Welcome to Wunnaland.. and testicles

Well good evening my munchkins of  ‘merry’ much. I’m drinking sherry. I was sober all yesterday, due to puppy sitting and being infront of the parents of a ‘Handsome,’ therefore i needed a bit of a drinky poo tonight…with me being a cocktail needing puss of glamour, of wiggly woo.

Yesterday, i puppy sat, the boy i’m datings dog. Well it belongs to his parents. Loverboy and I have never really spent a WHOLE entire day together, in a home like environment…and especially not sober! I got there around noon, and i left at about midnight…i know i had a great time, simply because the last thing he said to me, as i stepped out of his car and went to gently swing the door shut, was ‘Did you remember you knickers?’

Thankfully, spending a whole entire day together, in a home, sober wasn’t bad at all… I mean we are really different people, i’m a sequinned, Glamour puss ‘party girl’ who’s trying to exercise muscles that have never been stretched before…and i do mean the whole calm, ‘settley’ down thing. (All my other muscles stretch quite easily. Lol.) And well he finds this whole ‘home life’ thing quite easy. Loverboy enjoys quiet and peace. I enjoy noise  (made by me) and shirtless dancing boys. He’s been out drinking with me a great great deal, therefore i’m learning to ‘homebody‘ a little more…because i’m good like that. It’s a whole new world for me…and i’m liking it. I actually think we’re really great influences on each other. I make him feel confident and feel worth something again.  He makes me learn the art of peace & harmony…but lets me do it in heels. (High ones) Like i honestly believed i was fated to walk my fabulous path in life alone….But it seems there is actually room for one more, afterall. This boy looks at Me and tells me he wants to spend the next 60 years with me. (I’ll be dead, but that’d be lovely.) He really actually loves me. I’m used to being rolled out of a bed, and into the next available taxi. Well sometimes…i’m the one running for the taxi. (Wink-Pout-Giggle)

Y’know puppy sitting isn’t too bad, with a ‘Handsome‘ that adores you. All you have to do is give the puppy more attention than neccessary, and the ‘Handsome’ will get jealous. Men LOVE attention and i’m an attention whore, therefore i know how to work it. I cuddled and kissed and fluffed up the puppy good and proper…my ‘Handsome’ began to get jealous, told the puppy off for ‘steaming in on his bird’ and then locked him outside! Hahaha…awful! Then we laid on the sofa, and canoodled. Boys can never have girls over and not want to canoodle. I was in baby pink and tiny skirt, with chandelier diamantes in my ears, and boobies, being a little bundle of very deliberate ‘delicious.’ You can try and resist temptation…but yeah…you’re not gonna win that battle. I’m a Wunna. I mean I winked and pouted like a champion, and before you knew it, he was smooching me, cooking me the most delicious lunch, then taking me to little private room to watch telly, as we both squided onto a reclining chair that rocked, watched a documentary on autistic children (how romantic,) then i guess he did actually win in the end, because i found myself putting on a rather ‘dirty much’ show for him..whilst he played with his ‘Whoop-dee’ and i played with my ‘Oopsie.’ We’re in love…it’s fine. I had mucky man juice, spurted all over me…whilst Joan Rivers was on the telly, being roasted. Aaah young love. You couldn’t write a better fairytale.  Normal fairytales don’t end with you in a bathroom frantically scrubbing ‘man juice’ off your pure parts of lady, so his Dad wouldn’t find out…I had it on my boob, my wrist, my shirt, my thigh, my hair, my life….It was actually funny. It happens. 🙂

Anyway, i’ve had an amazing day today. I’m LIVING and loving it. Have fun!! Be happy, sweet and playful and you’re dreams will come true. I’ve never felt happier. (God i love this sherry.) Today, i’ve caught up with all my friends, done a bit of business, decided to make my Facebook Fanpage my second Profile…because it doesn’t have a friend limit. I’m a social, Puss of Glamour…you can’t limit my friends!! I had 62 requests today and because i’m a general cutie chops, with ‘feist’ and not a big old ‘bitchy boo,’ i sent each one of them a personal message telling them to add my 2nd profile (My Fan Page…plug plug) because my current profile is FULLAGE. I’ve kinda actually left my Facebook chat on for hours. I’m waiting for the pervy wurvies to make their usual ‘lovely lovely’ comments, so i can immediately delete them and make more room, for those who don’t have their hands down their pants, in a dark corner.

Talked to Loverboy today, (My hero, my knight, my ‘only boy to beable to put up with me’ other than Wazza. Loverboy had a test today and he passed it because i told him that if he did, i’d dress up as a slutty cheerleader for him…and &^%$£&.* Also talked to Jonny today, who filled me in on the London drama, and wondered how pigeons mated. Then i talked to actor Danny in Manchester, who had heard that i am nothing like people percieve me and that i’m actually rather posh and finally Latin Lover messaged me and told me to hurry on back to LA. (Where i pretty much grew up…emotionally.)

I’m quite popular with the boys right now, which is great because i’ve ‘cleaned’ up my image. I was always complaining about ‘The pervs.’ However, i realized i was giving out a really wrong message and not doing myself any favours. Plus, i’m in an odd position now, where a lot of young girls are looking up to me and i’m actually realizing it’s important, to at least attempt to be a decent role model…even if only one person is listenning…and that’s out of love. I love you all…be you young, old, girl, boy, gay, straight, happy, sad, drunk, sober, fat, thin, feisty or still. I’m a playful, love bunny of ‘oooh’…not a slaggamuffin bitchy boo. My pictures are now showing you who i really am.. .and i really love that. I also would really love it if ALL testicles tasted like jelly beans….but we can’t win them all. I AM TRYING. (Just go with it.)

I bottom line, want you to live your dreams, have fun, be happy and know that i love you…with a dollop of ‘ooh laa’ ofcourse. I also want to go to @EddClay’s Uni, in Cardiff. He sent me a picture of himself, being the Ultimate Glamour puss, whilst he was in the middle of a lecture. I loved it. He’s delicious. I should really lick him…but i have people who do that for me. 🙂

Remember that you can achieve anything your heart desires, all you have to do is try. Dreams come true every single day. Mine did. Yours can too. Just keep baby stepping and do it in your OWN time.

If you’re reading this and in America, ‘Paris Hilton’s British Best Friend‘ is on TONIGHT for you to have a watchy…on the TV Guide Channel…i think around 10pm? I dunno really? I’m BBF Chrissie. Chrissie Wunna. A delicious merry bundle of you already know that…but for  those of you who don’t…WELCOME TO WUNNALAND. (Bring a bottle…oh and you can leave your dignity at the door.)

If you spend your life half bored and half drunk (stole that off a fan) then there’s really no reason why you shouldn’t be reading this blog. 🙂 Remember that life is a human experience….it’s an amazing gift…so live it, the way you always wanted to! Celebrate being YOU!

I love you x

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