We on a World Tour


SO. Last night, I had made the executive decision to only go out for a couple drinks, as i wanted to paint my fireplace ‘Slate’ and decorate and write these blogs that are now getting down today. I can’t rest on Fridays and it’s not because such a massive ‘party girl’ and i need to get trashed, it’s actually because Keiran has the children on Friday’s and when they’re not with me my home is just a shell, a glamourous empty shell of nothing, without noise or reason. I go mental because i miss their bustle and the love that they fill our tiny little home with…So, I  resort to making the time go quickly and that’s by having a good time with good friends. I’m a ‘good time’ girl by nature. I love a drink, friends and a social environment. Ben had text me telling me they were all out…so off i strutted…in a shitty pinstripe shirt, droopy ponytail, red boots and cleavage. (I looked stupid and felt fat.)

Anyway, luckily EVERYONE had decided to go out for a couple drinks..and JUST A COUPLE as nobody actually ended up in ‘Biggies.’ I kNOW! How proud am I of myself!! ‘Biggies’ is shit on Friday’s anyhow.

I got a cab to the now posh ‘Tap and Barrel.’ Ben was already there with Dodge. Rich was walking up and I was slamming the door to my ‘take the long way around’ taxi, as I waved ‘goodbye’ to it and tottered into the bar.

I am currently LOVING the comfort of the ‘Tap and Barrel’ and it upgrades Ponty a little. It’s now like a cosy wine/ale/liquor bar, that is pricey, but the best place to start the night in.

Got there, the boys were all there and already drinking. Probably already a bit pissed as I walked in on their game, on being on a ‘World TOUR…’ stating that I was tired from working all day, fat and feeling frumpy…

Now, the ‘World Tour’ was an accidental game that seemed to accidentally happen when they got pissed, where each and every time the boys went to the bar for a drink it had to be from a different country of the world. (It didn’t really HAVE TO BE, but fuck it they were pissed and coming up with shit…so i joined in.)

So, they had ales from America. Some chocolate drink that Dodge loved and Ben hated, but drank anyway. Note that when you chose your drinks, the drink’s actual country of origin is where you currently are on your ‘world tour?’ Are you getting this? LOl. I@m not either.

So…Rich was doing Belgium I think and i had a vodka, which mean I was in Russia. God, knows what the boys were drinking, but it was a different country every time for a while and you could tell as they were getting really pissed and ding weird laughs to attract the attention of others for kicks.

I got a wine, which took me to France, as i bantered and walked down memory lane with Rich…who was on the same drink all the time because he’s actually sensible. But he must’ve been a bit pissed as he walkde up a random guy who had mistaken for our old friend Dale and randomly started greeting him with fond affection. HAHAHA. He even said, ‘Chrissie did you see Dale in there..because you didn’t say hello to him? ‘ HAHAHA. It wasn’t him AT ALL…but kinda looked like a chubbier version of him. But yeah, we pretty much chatted shit and slagged others off…but that’s what we do. It’s fun and allowed. 🙂  I actually miss being a retard with his ‘wifey’ Katty…I need to drink with her. She makes me smile and gives me rum..which must be something they do as Rich also gave me rum…like a really strong neat rum shot, because I bought a shitty Captain Morgan and Coke.

Me: ‘OOhhhh, I have a RUM.’

Rich: ‘Which Rum?’

Me: ‘Captain Morgan…I’M IN JAMAICA!!!’

Rich: ‘You knobhead, out of all the rums you could’ve picked, you chose a shit one…You’re not in Jamaica, you’re in fucking Sheffield.’

Ben: ‘I fucking told you to pick a better one.’

Me: ‘I thought i was in Jamaica 🙁 ‘

Rich can’t take it anymore and runs off to get proper rum…neat…with lime.

I drank it, it blew my head off…i was SOOOOOOOOOOOOOO in Jamaica and for the rest of the night i was pissed.

I actually hung out with Ben alot that night as we’re buddies now and he secretly fancies me. 🙂 He’ s actually a great guy, like he’s lovely to me and most people. He let me wear his hoodie and we bought each other rounds…even though he got all angry bit evening…because he felt like all his ‘secrets’ had been let out…HAHAHA. But he got over it when we moved to The Blacky Moor (another pub in Ponty)…and we only moved because the ‘Tap and Barrel’ decided to do a ‘Lock in’ but no one wanted to get locked in because when you’re pissed it gets boring (hence why i say it’s a good start off place) and well in Ben’s words ‘it’s too fucking expensive to get locked in here.’ HAHAHA I LOVE EXPENSIVE, but couldn’t be arsed with the thought of being ‘LOCKED IN.’ It suffocates me and makes me nervous, be it in pubs, life, friendships, buildings or relationships. HAHA.

Rich went home, Ben, Dodge (who was now fucked, but had the best laugh ever) and I moved to the next place. We took Matty and Webbo with us, as Matty was  actually getting by this chick friend that he had, that he spoons and gets boners with, I one point i had to tell them off to being fighty, like they were might children…as he was getting  punched in the goolies..repeatedly. 🙂 Love is…(Matt’s actually a good guy. I noticed that last night.)

Okay…we’re now at ‘The Blacky’  (new pub) after doing all these ‘World Tour’ drinks. I’m drunk, tired from work and lagging really? I definitely wasn’t as fun as usual. Everyone was lagging, apart from the people who usually lag. Odd? It was a switch around.

All sat, all chatting, all slowly drinking but not feeling it as much as we should. Ben got into a ‘bromance’ with some old friend of his…God knows? He doesn’t have a job but a girlfriend who pays and lots of tattoes? HAHA.

I watched Dodge get more fucked and have to be at work at 7am.  We reminded him that none of us actually had work the next morning and that is was now 1am. But we kinda did it really loudly, via a chant, and dancing chant arms. (‘Chrissie, you’ve made me paranoid now.’)

Luke showed up an d’really enjoyed’ his fishbowl drink, like he was a little boy who’s granny had just baked him a pie. He was soo smiley about it.

Ben was utterly LOVELY TO ME ALL NIGHT and for the first time ever we didn’t even LOSE EACH OTHER!!! He says that we go somewhere then i’ll fuck off and ditch him and i say he does? Last night…we were there by each other ALL NIGHT to the point where we EVEN MANAGED TO GET CHILLI CHEESE FRIES BEFORE TAXIS HOME! I KNOW!

It’s probably because we didn’t go to ‘Biggies.’

Again, he was actually really lovely to me…as right now we have a good friendship. I don’t actually know what’s going to happen in this space…but he’s a good guy, and i’ve noticed that.

When I got home, i promised that i’d call him…and we chatted.

He was drunk and telling that he wouldn’t say no to finding love if it came along and having someone to be with and that he didn’t judge girls and how much he’d just love to sort of have someone that he could love. (This is making him sound cringe…but it was nice because he was open and I was doing a wee. 🙂 )

I agreed, because i’m the same. I’m never looking, but if something happens naturally i’m completely open to it. I want to find the man of my dreams, who’ll love me ever.

But Lord knows what happened as I was laid in bed, with my box of chilli cheese fries on my bedside table, that i couldn’t eat and I SHOCKED MYSELF UP!! HAHAHA.

I looked to my right and i still had my phone in my hand and heard Ben shouting out ‘WUNNA!!!! WUNNA!!! WUNNA? ARE YOU STILL THERE?’


Whilst he had been pouring his heart out, i had fallen asleep by chillie cheese fries by accident! HAHAHA

I fell so deep into an accidental sleep that i shocked myself up when he was shouting down the phone.


I apologized and did that thing were you pretend you haven’t been asleep and was totally listening the whole time. 🙂 I put the phone to my ear and listened and all he said was..

‘Did you fucking fall asleep? Hahaha. Am i that boring?’

HAHAHA. We just laughed…and well we hung up and i fell asleep in my Thorpe Audlin bed (on the right hand side) alone and he fell asleep in his Carleton Glen bed (on the left hand side) alone. 🙂

It’s like a fun fairytale, but with no happy ending. 🙂

He’s just sent me a text reading,

‘Wunna, that mental guy is out. Haha. If he stabs me, it’s been  a pleasure knowing you. HAHAHA.’


Wunna x








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