Yesterday was AMAZING! There was a brief moment of *panic* when my pre-booked 11am taxi arrived at 11.15am..which really wouldn’t have been too ‘cutting it fine’ if i didn’t have an 11.35am train to catch.
I leapt upon it, was treated like a Queen throughout my journey. I celebrated my existance with a bacon butty…my current fave thing to consume in the morning and i glided towards the Capital, for my exciting day of worky work. (*Puts down Blackberry-Kicks back on train journey.*)
First stop.. Mind Studios. Bow Rd, East London, Fairfield Ave (well i think it’s Avenue?) An easy tube down there, a pleasant walk to the studio. Lots of attention along the way, whilst i was armed with my hidden bump and my strawberry Ribena. I’m lethal on that stuff…it sexes me up good and proper. Tottered up the stairs, after creeping through giant doors of blue. Met by a lovely named ‘Matt,’ escorted into the dressing room. A wonderfully warm greeting surrounded me, by a tired but delicious production team and then the producer..( a sexy, means business, but might get kinky after a a glass of wine female) swaggered in, all smiles and and ooh laa.) I adore her. She’s got a certain ‘you want this’ about her! *Sizzle*
Anyway, immediately sat down ont he comfy red sofa, whilst changing my boots to 9 inch heels. I was handed money by Matt. Advice by the sound guy. Then the producer sat by my sat and not only congratulated me on my appearance on the show, (‘Sex Lessons’ on Fiver.) But also congratulated me on my *bump.* I gave her a little peek and she was happily shocked. I mean last time i was there, i was pregnant, yet unfortunately nobody knew..not even me! (I was giving cucumbers blowjobs and taking about anal! I’m going to be a GREAT mother.)
Not to blow my own trumpet (*toot-toot*.) But she did actually say that they were all dying to have me back, because i was Channel 5’s favourite! (Team Wunna much! The People’s champ!) I have this problem when a camera is on me. I start showing off in the form of telling everyone, EVERYTHING, about my life…without that oh so important intelligence to CENSOR! ( I mean, i shoot my boarding school Quacker education, out my arse!!) I spill it ALL and then some! It’s messy and i don’t even realize i’m doing it. I sort of *mist* into this haze of unstoppable Wunna magic…and trgaically, but sort of charmingly…it works. Heelllooos the stations FAVOURITE much!! 🙂 ( I saw one of the guys off the show, the upfront east end one, just finishing up, as i was strutting in. I was sort of star struck, cos i had seen him on the telly. lol. I just smiled and walked on, because he was doing that thing where you beg for the producer to remember you for future projects!) I tend not to do the begging thing. The idea is to give them a show!! Y’know show’em what you’ve got when it matters. It’s their job (and they’re really good at it) to remember well suited talent.
The interview was AMAZING! Sexual, delicous and candid. I actually thought i could’ve done better, but at the time, my mind was on full flashback mode of all the kinky things that had happened in my life. There were sooo many, that i couldn’t get it all out. I sexily but comedically bantered about gays, sex, lesbos, who has it easier…the gays or the lesbos? Sexy myths. Fetishes. people weeing on people, slaves, religion, two girls one cup, love, facebook, trust, and ofocurse there was my favourite section, celverly titled ‘What the F***!’ I told them that i shoudl be the poster child for that campaign.
MORE importantly and just before i had been perfectly place, in the correct lighting, mood and camera setting…i noticed (4 seconds before the interview was about to start) the producer shoes! OMG! TO DIE FOR much! I mean, she was dressed in sort of jeans, and one of those long cardigans…i think? Plain, normal clours. Then as she sat down, ready to ‘lights, camera, action’ the Wunna…what did i see? I saw, two pointy toed, hot RED, furry leopard print shoes of the high heeled variety poke their way out from beneath her denim. OMG!!! I nearly died and screeched ‘THEY ARE THE HOTTEST SHOES EVER!! OMG! THEY ARE SOOO SEXY!’
This is the best part. When, i say things like that to people, my sheer genuine excitement, and terrifying voice invades their personal boundaries and they shyly sway away. Mmmkaaaay! Not this hottie. All filming was put on a *halt* for a minute. She stood up, she edged the denim up her leg and like a total puss of glamour and with a sexy pride and dignity. She flaunted her red, leopard print, piece of ‘sexual’ like it was a BEAST of sheer beauty! I LOVE people like that! People who are not afraid to confidently show off their ‘ooh laa.’ It was magical Then the interview began! You’re going to have to watch it. Great show! It’s done really well!
Straight after that bit of pokery…i double *air kissed,* suggested the sound guy had porn in his back pocket and with my 9 inchers now in my bag, and my boots back on, i quickly tottered to my next bit of worky…which was all the way across town.
Next stop.. Busy central London. 1 Stephen Street. The Freemantle Media building…where the offices of Talk Back Thames, BMG, Sony…and pretty much everything lies. If you’re in entertainment…it’s one of those buildings thhat you walk into and think ‘yeah, i’ve made it,’ because you feel like you’ve been fitted amongst some of the best in the industry. It’s like when you first go to an audition on the Warner Bros (now CW network) lot in LA and ‘guest pass’ in. You feel important and like you’re on your way to making the big time. I remember auditioning for ER and being half shuttled, half golf carted to the building i was to read in. We past the stage, where they film ‘Friends,’ the West Wing building, the areas where they once filmed Grease…and you kind of ‘inside smile’ clutching you sides, (as in audition pages) knowing you’re where you always wanted to be! The Hollywood dream! I was only about 21 or something?
The first time i walked onto the Warner bros lot, not as a tourist but as an actor, with a dream in my heart, it felt magical. As it does when you walk into the ABC network, or Disney building, or Fox…. After a year you’ve been in them so many times, tending more and more failed auditions, that it kind of becomes normal. 🙂 You’re still happy…but way less shocked at your achievement! lol I’ve been in those buildings millions of times now…Yet even though it’s normal..you always know that some of the world greatest and biggest stars have also walked your exact path to their auditions, way back when. And i’m not meaning the Chuckle Brothers. I’m talking Brad Pitt, Johnny Depp, Marliyn Monroe. Amazing! At least i got to do that! It really prepped me for what was to lie ahead…and funnily enough…in England!
Yesterday walking through the 1 Stephen Street, Freemantle Media building doors. I just felt great! I’m in a different position now. A much much better one, due to my mild telly stint and my delicious bloggery. I swung through the revolving doors, earlier than i thought i would be. I Immediately tottered in my party dress..( i always wear a party dress…i’m not a casual girl and i’m also an idiot, dipped in *bimbo*) sat on the first reception area black stool like chair i could find, changed from my boots into black stilettos, spritzed twice, hair tossed, then with a smile, went up the reception desk with a ‘Hi, i’m Chrissie Wunna. I’m here to see Jonathan. Take Me out USA?’
The girls at the recpetion desk had been watching me from my entrance…wondering what i was up to? They called up and with a ‘Here’s your pass Chrissie. Jonathan’ll meet you on floor five.‘ I was permitted into the building and elevatored upward to casting!
The floor five doors opened, The Wunna tottered out, with a bag and her coat in her hands. I was immediately greeted my Jonathan, who was actually REALLY lovely for letting me meet him at that time. He knew i had been filming earlier in the day, so scheduled me in after all that jiggery..which i thought was pretty perfect. Funny, charming, hot, cutie. He knew Iona who worked as part of the production on ‘Paris Hiltons British Best Friend,’ who i adored simple because she put up with my nonsense and picked me to go through onto the show, in casting. Apparently she’s currently stranded on the back of a navy ship filming. LMAO! From pretty pink BBF prison, to sweaty navy ships! I love it!
Joanthan talked me through what was going to happen and about the show. I filled in all my paperwork, that we BOTH manged to spill water all over and ruin. Woohoo! It was so much fun. I love Jonathan. Then after about 10 whole mintues. He set ups his camera and put me on film. I interviewed, loved it, laughed all the way through it and after about i’d say 30 mins…it was all done! I guess, i do things playfully, but with a fun, fast flair. We had a blast!
He thanked me. I thanked him..with a *giggle-wink.* Then after grabbing my what seemed like a thousand bags…it was one…i sauntered out merrily, smiling at every being i passed and looking at all the BAFTA’s and Digital spy awards on display! I glided back down to the ground floor, handed in my ID badge, changed my heels back into boots..(How Cinderella of me) i revolving doored my way out of the building, only to get stopped by a young 24 yr old gent, who’s name was also ‘Jonny’ (common name) who with a cheeky, flair of London town…told me i was beauitful and asked me about my life. He worked in the buidling. Infact, maybe even on the same show? He said he had seen me walk in and thought i was hot. I asked if he was hitting on me? When i’m in work mode i forget about boys. Silly of me really! He simply cheeky bantered with me for a little. Told me he wasn’t tryingt o get his swagger on, and had a girlfriend. He apparently just wanted to tell me i was beautiful and that he would love to go out for a drink with me. 🙂 (I still got it bitches! Lol)
After ten minutes, I tubed it back, slowly and merrily to Kings Cross, after the most wonderful day of work. I mean, i feel really lucky. Two shows, one day! Life has really turned around. I’ve tampered with everything, good and bad, to find out what people and life is all about. Worked all different jobs. Experienced different lives. But now…it’s all come together. I had an AMAZING day. I have an AMAZING life and what makes it all so perculiar is that i’m no Danni Minogue, Cheryl Cole, or Victoria beckham. I’m just a normal girl…who’s accidentally doing well. Proving YOU ALL can! Two shows, one day…with one currently airing. I love it. A book. A tour. A life. Thank you GOD!! Infact, thankyou YOU!
I actually had to sit at Starbucks for and and eat everything in sight as i waited for my train. I had gotten done so early! Two hours earlier than expected! Loved it though. I even bought a bun ..a victoria sponge cupcake, to be exact and pretended it wasn’t mine…Then when no-one was looking i gobbled it up, with my greek wild honey yoghurt, cheese sandwich and juice. Yum Yum! I’m truely loving my 2nd trimester of motherhood. The being sick part has dissolved away and the GREAT part of being preggars has kicked in! I’m LOVING IT!
More blogs to come today. I have so much to tell you. Trannies, Jack Daniels and parent meetings! Strap in. Strap on. Close eyes!