Tinder off, Boys and Panic Buttons.

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Dear Glamour Pusses! I am sooo sorry for for not blogging sooner, but i’ve been busy and i’ve hit *panic* button, with a big glitzy, kitten fist *thud.* I feel as though i have SO much on and i can’t get my head around it all, with ease. If this was a dance off, i’ve totally have it down, yet it’s not, is it? It’s real life, ‘trying to do well’ work stuff…which always makes me panic and I guess it makes me panic because I want it all to do well, which makes me feel as though failure terrifies me. However, it DOESN’T…as i’m used to picking up the pieces a hundred times over and it takes a lot of that to execute things appropriately in the end. I know that. I get that. I’m excited for my future, because it’s all going so well…but holy shit does it make me panic!!! I’m not good during times like this, as i surrender to the work load and sort of just start to spin out with my eyes shut, my fingers cross and maybe need a Princess stress weep. 🙂 Yipeee!

I’m stressed. I have the new launch of my lash line to develop. I’m sorting out the new samples, sorting through potential models, doing the packaging, running the rest of the lashes, trying to muddle through hiring, firing, working my full time day job, keeping life social and of course the two things that matter….the babies!

It’s actually quite a lot and if i need anything, this little kitty NEEDS HELP. *Waaaa.*

Right, so in the last week, lots has happened. I’ve done meet ups, meetings, work and Ben’s birthday in Leeds. The weather is awful which doesn’t make things easier and i’m behind on all my work, due to a severe lack of time.

I’ve caught up on my sleep and i’m happy. Don’t get me wrong. I couldn’t be happier. But it doesn’t mean that i’m not busy, mentally, physically and emotionally. My mind is on constant tick over but because i know i can do this. Once i chill and feel relaxed…even though i work better under pressure…i’ll be okay. I guess I just want everything to go well and everyone to be happy.

This time last week. I guess, it was almost this time last week. I was sat at The Carleton, with Ben, Nick, and Dodge. I reckon it was Thursday, but i couldn’t really remember, as time and days seems to mess into one. I’d worked all day and Ben had asked me to meet him after for a drink, which i’m always up for. I arrived there…in booty shorts….and the boys were found on some ‘answering questions’ game machine, thingy, at The Carleton entrance, getting shit wrong. 🙂

We all sat down, Nick ordered a burger. (It was like an anorexics version of ‘Man vs Food.’ He was sort of stuffed on hardly anything, yet acted as though he had just consumed 79 pizzas, in one sitting for the telly. I giggled and wiggle and then Dodge met us, within 20 minutes…and joined us at our table…to enjoy a ‘quiet one’…with brandy.)

Banter, banter, catch ups and delightful chitter occurred. They talked about midgets, with video’s, doing a ‘Booty dance,’ how some friend looked like Michael Jackson, who Dodge felt he needed to inform via Facebook. The usual…talk about cars….Eastenders…chicks..and all things inbetween…then Dodge and Nick felt like a ‘curtain off’ was appropriate, (which is the act of turning your hair into ‘curtains’ for kicks) as I videoed and Ben watched on. Ben was quite subdued. Tom Foolery wasn’t his thing that night. He’s quite balanced, so will only whop out silliness when he feels silly. Nick and Dodge are attention whorey , like moi..so any opportunity that rises, where in which a camera is plonked on and they can perform..they will…and i don’t don’t blame them really. I’m exactly the same. Ben is always really aware of what is going on and will carefully pick his moments. I’m similar to him in the sense that i always know what i’m doing, yet i’m far more of a dickhead and adore a bit of ‘look at me.’ He loves it to, yet is more conscious of what others may think of him. Not  a bad thing really.


THEN, I decided that Nick had totally lost his mojo since ‘Take Me out’ as chicks kept ditching him. (He’s a sensitive soul.) This however, spurred on his inner ego and well, mine also, which made us commit to a ‘Tinder off.’ I even installed the app to beat his ass at this ‘Tinder off’ and well…let’s just say now..I WON. (But ofourse. I mean play me at chess…i’d be shit at that, but don’t play me at trying to make guys like me. 🙂 Amateurs. Lol.)

Anyone, ofcourse you don’t know what a ‘Tinder off’ is because you’re not stupid and infantile like we are. But it is the art of going on Tinder, swiping through your choices, after the word ‘GO’ is shouted and trying to be the FIRST PERSON TO GET A MATCH, with a member of the opposite sex that YOU ACTUALLY FIND ATTRACTIVE.  He even had better choices than I had, as I had a bunch of beer bellied bin men, party boys or strange ones? He had a bunch of average looking chicks…so he could have won this with his eyes closed…and by what he was ‘liking’ he probably did. 🙂 HAHAHA.

I swiped though hundreds in a minute, saw a pic of one guy, who looked a bit more decent than the others, so i liked it..Nick did the same with his chick choices, but at the exact same time,WE BOTH got a match…meaning it had to be best out of three.

We went on, except, he got distracted with messaging them, well…because he’s a guy. I don’t do that, because…i’m ‘Wunna.’ Lol. I just tend not too because boys bite back with me. I mean, this one guy had been messaging me so much that i had to track through the thread to try and figure out why…and well it was because Dodge had once taken my phone and messaged him this:

‘I’ve had a whisky baby and i’m drying up.’ 🙂 FFS


We started again, we ‘matched’ at the EXACT same time three times in a row (even though eh accused me of cheating because one of my choices apparently looked like Phil Mitchel. HAHAH…then BOOM. Last round, he was still swiping away…I did ‘like’…and WAHOOO immediately and before him, waaay before him, it was a ‘MATCH.’

Deal done. Wunna Wins, Nick had lost his mojo. I deleted the app.

Infact we laughed about it afterward because he actually RAN OUT OF LIKES on Tinder and who knew that could even fucking happen!!!! HAHAHAHAHAH. I mean God Knows, how many chicks he’s been ‘liking.’ No wonder he can never find ‘true love’…as spreading yourself thinly never works, i’ve done that, you end up all lonely and puzzled. It’s about noticing who you have in your life, or who has been introduced into your life and is making some kind of magical impact, to the point where you can’t help but fall for them, madly. Innit. If you spread yourself thinly, you’re taking short cuts on the route to love…(not that i’m an expert,) and when you take shortcuts…you fucking get cut short. (Cheesy, but true.)

(I’m currently writing this at The Broken Bridge in Pontefract and men with no teeth or Scottish people, keep hitting on me, like i’m NOT BUSY. I’m trying to take over the world here, not cop off with no teeth fellas.)

Okay, Nick left and Quiz night occured. Ben, Dodge and I accidentally got involved, but were up for it…and we had drank more, so we felt like it was a good idea.

Although he quiz was easier than the hard as hell one at The Tap…we still got most of it wrong and I cheated the whole time, with Google. (Oh shush i don’t care…it’s not like it was important. It’s a fucking pub quiz, not the elections.)

Dodge is up for cheating. Ben IS NOT! HAHAHAHA. Whenever, i wa whispering, ‘It’s Miley Cyrus’…he REFUSED to write it down because he hates cheats! HAHAHAHA.

Long quiz, great night, we still lost, a women even mildy told me off for cheating because her table won. Then we watched all these other people WIN these other lucky star prizes that we weren’t involved in and left.

Dodge walked home. Ben and I chittered chattered a bit, in our favourite creepy woods…which I find soothing now.

Got home, slept…and went to work the next morning!

To be continued….

Ps/ Writing this blog has made me so much happier. HAHAHAH. I simply adore great memories and dollies, i have LOTS!


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