The Ego has Landed!

Most AMAZING day ever! Oh my word! This little kitty cat is making cleverly ‘sexy‘ much, stiletto shaped marks of  glory, va voom, giggle and what’s that word i’m looking for? Oh yeah…stardom! It was meant to be a dandy little Sunday afternoon shopping out of boredom trip and well due to this insane bubbly, almost giddy, positive ‘Ooh‘ i’ve been feeling recently, it ended up being one of those ‘OMG, i’m actually off the telly and have a big blog’ days! I have felt like a star all day and let me tell you…just like the Port i’m currently drinking…it went straight to my head. (I flipping needed it too. Last night, i was fucking pulling angry faces at old pictures of Me and my ex-hubby and mentally blaming him for everything that went wrong in my life. LOL. Oh it was hilarious. Port makes me all emotional and funny. I was stomping around like a Dolly with a weight problem..but i snapped out of it with laughter, then ate a muffin and told Jonny i loved him. CHAMPION.)

Anyway, got to Doncaster armed with family, boobs, a pout, a wink and a blue polo neck jumper, with a giant white fur. Began by having a little lunch at Mizu. I love it there, because they give us free food, like we’re either homeless or ‘off the telly.’ On the way there, (3 minutes in,) a delicious gaggle of the most beautiful teenage girls, all trendy and everything they were. (When i was a teenager, i’m sure i wore scrunchies, shell suits and slanted eyes? Times have changed. They looked like the cover of Teen Vogue.) I saw them totter past me…do what i call ‘the notice.’ Not dare to ask if it was Me. I deliberately walked onward pretending i didn’t see. I do this on purpose..and not because i’m a dickhead, ( I am a dickhead,) but because i want to stir the COURAGE in people. 

And like the girls of GREATness they were, one of them (after a little bit) came a running after me, with a ‘Are you Chrissie?’ I LOVE courage in girlies! Good on ya. Once you’ve made the move, i’m alll good and from that point on, i had a banter with them and treated them like they were my best friends, because i adored them. I’m surprised i could even see. Hungover much! But they were BRILLIANT and i had already by this time meet 3 other groups of girls. Before i had my noodles at Mizu, i decided to change it up a little and take pictures of them instead. They loved it, but then ventured off, whilst i stuffed my face with carbs and did more ‘hello’s’ with other carb eaters, who watch telly. 🙂

Finished up. I was with my family. My dad was wanting to do something sweet for my mum, and i had been on a business call all the way through lunch. Therefore we decided to have a wander to a trendy jewellery store in the Frenchgate…can’t even remember what it’s called, but it’s a Boutique. I again saw my new girl entourage (who i adore) on my way to the store…so i thought i’d give them a wave and a ‘Hi babes!’ They were divine! I saw them get excited, which i like. I enjoy being a being who brings a ‘skip’ in ya step and they commited for..again what i call…‘The follow.’ I enjoy ‘the follow.‘ I’m an attention whore. It works for me.

Got to the store, my dads picking out expensive charms for a bracellet he’s buying my mother. The girls…my lovely girly girls of ‘follow,’ ariive at the store and the with a polite ‘may i have your picture’…we all WENT TO TOWN on the posing. I’m not kidding, in a about 5 minutes the jewellery store was FILLED with pouting, posing, camera phone mania, girls, mums, me and unhappy looking sales people. The store is quite tiny, therefore when people are in the doorway doing pictures, they get pissed. But fuck it, where else i am gonna stand and be amazing… I took the posse of ‘ooh laa’ out the store, into the normal shopping center part and we got a magician to take our pictures.

No word of a lie, the next 15 minutes, were taking up by the cutest  teenage boy called Michael and his friend ‘Joe,’ doing magic card tricks at Me, and filming the whole palava! I actually thought he was brilliant. I kept telling him. He kept blushing. The girls knew him already from school, and were quickly used as props. I asked him what his dream was? He said wanted to be like Derren Brown, or David Blaine. Aww! Then after a long ‘magic trick’ while of deliciousness, my parents had bought their jewel like goods and i had to venture off and be a decent daughter.

The rest of the day was spent being the happiest bunny in all the land. My Mother began laughing at my tragicness. I don’t think she can believe she even bred ‘Chrissie Wunna.’ I bought two dresses, jewellery, shoes, makeup and train tickets. I was watched, stopped and photographed the whole entire day. I love every moment and LOVED the fact that i actually got to stop and talk to pretty much each and every one of you. I’m good like that. I’m a great person for you to randomly bump into! People were lovely today! (Apart from one blond slag, who thought i was gonna dry-hump her boyfriend. 🙂 ) ‘Hello’ doesn’t mean i’m gonna sleep with him, right now this precious minute. It simply means ‘hello…. (i’m going to sleep with you later.) 🙂

Loving life. I have a very busy week. I’m actually in London tomorrow, just for the a bit of it really. I’m off to Abergavenny in Wales on Tuesday for a day of radio interviews, greetings and promo. I’m dead excited!!! Watch it bitches…i’m coming to get you. But London should be dandy tomorrow afternoon. I’ll need an early night, coz i have an early morning. But i left my appartment spotless, so i’m happy!! Aaaah bliss.

Life is hotting up. And being up north is changing everything. I’m feeling amazing, happy and oooh la laaaa! And it seems when you are, wonderful things happen. I haven’t moved to Leeds, as of yet, but i will be doing shortly. I can’t wait to experience the new chapter! New friends. New boys. New party. New Town.

Other than that, i’m off to Nandos tongiht for a bit of chicken and rice with my Mother. I feel drunk, therefore it’ll be a dinner of greatness! I’ve got to tan. I’ve got a lot of admin to do. I’ve got all these stats to hand in to TV people. There’s more than i thought, therefore Wazza and I are ploughing through them and getting them handed in like homework (that we never did at school) so we an take over the world and all that good stuff! I’m very HAPPY right now. Bubbling! I hope you are too, my little coochie coos. I love you very much. Thankyou for everything. INNIT! *wink* Oh and i practiced the art of ‘smiling’ today. it worked. I made me feel marvellous. If you’re down (and you should’nt be) all you have to do is not be…and you honestly will feel GREAT! (Oh and met my old school friend today! Apparently it’s a bugger trying to get a hold of me. I’m going to watch the play at the school she works in, which is the school i went to.) Right, that’s it…i can’t see or type now…i#m drunk. Nando’s here i comage! Pontefract! Xscape! I love ME. Get INVOLVED!!!

My girl posse of ‘Follow.’ I LOVE THEM!!!!