Life, Love & Really Bad Habits…

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Hope you’ve had a really wonderful weekend! I had the BEST family time with Ruby & Junior. We lunched at ‘The Clam & Cork’ in Doncaster. (I had the oysters, Ruby had the sea bass. I had to go buy Junior a boiled hot dog from a cart, by watermelons. Lol) We shopped. We loved. We picked out our Style Favourites at Primark. I’m a huge Primark fan So as a family, we couldn’t feel happier, to be sharing our favourite pieces with you.

Primark has hands down’ shown us a lot of love & for that, i’m absolutely grateful for! In my mind there’s no reason for anyone to spend an ENTIRE fortune, in order to LOOK GOOD or most of all FEEL GOOD.

There ain’t no shame in your Primark game!

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In Wunna Land, our expensive buys, are always a ‘treat.‘ I mean we spend a lot on ‘good times’ and great food. Yet, when it comes to fashion, and I LOVE FASHION, I love BEAUTY….we’ve signed up to ‘Primania’ with our hearts full of joy.

I’ve shopped there for years and now it’s time to celebrate it! 

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(I mean, what is life without a knitted rainbow cardy, right!)

Okay, so….

The start of my week has been blissful, up until last night. (We’re only on Tuesday. Haha.) Last night, I decided to balls things up, for myself, which I do quite often. You know when you just don’t prioritize something correctly and you therefore accidentally, let yourself down, because a niggly guilt meanders through your head. A niggly guilt that won’t go away because you temporarily hurt someone. That’s what I did. That’s how I felt. I’m okay now. I’ve got over it look…

Yet, a lesson has been learnt…and I guess, I need to break another bad habit. (This is all really good for me. I’m going through a really CLEANSING time, by accident. Lol.)  I don’t smoke. I won’t drink as much. I’m wearing chakra balancing beads. I’m crying to love songs by JLS.  Next i’ll be doing yoga on my front lawn, in eco friendly workout attire and stroking goats…

I don’t think so… I’m a glamour puss, not a hippie. 😉 I am actually quite spiritual by nature..throw me a pack of Tarot cards and a voodoo doll and i’m sound. 😉

But…

WHY AM I STILL LEARNING LESSONS AT 37!!

Anyway, there’s lots going on. my Insta story is on fire, right now, with views. Work is on it’s way. I’m in limbo. I’m waiting for a something to air on TV. I have loads of shoots. I’m waiting for my time. My moment. I’m loving being a mum. My love life is still rubbish. Well not rubbish. The guy that I went on the Manchester date with, is looking forward to seeing me again. So, that’s sweet.

(All last night, I kept drinking red wine and accidentally crying to JLS songs, because I missed ‘The Swirl.’ Hahaha.) 

I love being a girl.

To be honest, I’ve been quite hormonal of recent. (As you may have guessed?) But i’ve found that as soon as I ‘doll’ myself up, whop in my hoops and get strutting…I’m fine. I’m dandy.

Just getting on with it, is the best way!

I feel like something great is going to happen to me in the love department? Even if it’s not right now…The ending to my story, when it comes to love…feels like it’s going to be amazing. Like Life has been leading me up to something phenomenal. (She glues her ‘rosy tinted specs’ to her face.)

Everything you go through, I believe is for a reason…

I’ve enjoyed by path, as ‘colourful’ as it’s been…I’m ready for a Happy Ending. Surely, I deserve one, in both work and love, for crying out loud!!

I’m committing to everything. I’m throwing myself into everything. You get nothing out of life if you don’t commit to it. 

You’ll never experience the happiness intended for you, if you don’t ‘throw skin to the wind’ and just go for it. Survive the bad. Enjoy the good. Be it big, small or inbetween. Just live. Just love. Just be ALIVE.

In the end, you’ll KNOW why you had to go through it all…

I believe that…

(But I still believe in Santa and Fairies…so don’t take my word for it.)

Right now, I can tell you, that i’m really proud of the kids. Junior has a true heart of gold. He’s insightful and loving..Yet won’t let you push him around, when he feels brave. Ruby is ambitious and dynamic. She’s a tough cookie. She is every inch….well…ME. (I’m kinda feeling really bad for Pete, right now, because Ruby hasn’t wanted to hang out with him over the last couple weeks…)

‘Tell Dad, that I do love him. Everything’s fine. I’d just rather spend my time with you and Junior, mum…’

She’s almost outgrowing him…and she’s only 7.

Pete: ‘Chrissie, it’s depressing me…’

The babies have really got stuck into this whole ‘showbizzy’ malarky, by choice, before you all start……I’m kinda having to rein them in a little and make them concentrate on school…because they have so much going on in October. I can’t keep up!!

But I actually couldn’t be prouder of them.

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Life is good. I’m tired though. I’m looking after myself more. I’m stepping up my game. I’m adoring my beauty regime. I’m wanting to make my mark, now. I’m also wanting to fall in love. I wonder if ‘The Swirl’ ever thinks about me? (I think about you. I think about you a lot.) I wonder if The Manchester Date guy will try to pursue a future with me? (You were so lovely to me. You made me feel lovely.)

I’m concentrating on my career…and like I said, this time LAST YEAR…

I ain’t gonna be dropping no ball, this time…

Watch this space…

Wunna Land, is on it’s way UP!!!

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30 Something Sexiness….

Woke up to the most beautiful message from one of my old LA guy friends ‘Raffi,’ who I adore more than anything, because he’s always filled with Wunna Love. He produces music and when I was a mid 20 something year old girl, in West Hollywood, we recorded a couple tracks together, that his brother had whammed up.

His brother was working with the likes of Britney Spears, N’sync, R.Kelly, Michael Jackson…His grandfather, worked with Elvis. So, let’s just say producing beats runs through his soul. He’s a ‘brother,’ and he’s swag.

But all that to one side…We had the most amazing friendship. We’d hang out all the time. He’d come around to my condo, after being at the studio and we’d just sit in his car, chill and chatter, under the LA night stars. It was great!

When he was a young 20 something he looked at me and said,

‘I’d be so happy, if I woke up to you every morning…But at fifty, you’d probably piss me off. Haha.’ 

Then he drank a Red bull, it gave him wings and he drove over my wheely bins, en route to drop by ‘Neyo’s. (Yeah…the ‘So sick of love songs’ Neyo.)

 Raffi’s always been such a good friend to me. In fact ALL of my LA friends are to this day, SO SO close to me. We tell each other how much we love one another, literally all day long and that’s because growing up…we went through SO, SO MUCH together, in one of the toughest towns emotionally, to try and make it in showbusiness.

This morning, I woke up to an insta DM from ‘Raffi’ after i posted the above picture…All he said was…

‘You are so beautiful.’

So 13 years on, and now on entirely different sides of the world, he is still so utterly lovely and goes out of his way to try and make a glamour puss smile. 🙂

(Thank you for that! I love you so dearly. May the night stars guide you bro.) 

Right. Okay…

I’m still filled with anxiety and panic and I have no clue why, really? I’m getting on with it though. I’m good at that. I’m doing it with a ‘100 watt’ smile and hoping it’s just hormones.

What am I terrified of?

This morning I posted the above pic, because I always thought that growing up a model and one that sold ‘sexiness‘….I always thought that I wouldn’t feel ‘sexy’ when I grew older.

The opposite has happened and at 37, I probably, right now, feel at my SEXIEST. It’s so crazy? I don’t know whether it’s because I’m more comfy in my own skin, or i’m just laid back with my natural ‘Va Voom.’ I’ve got nothing to prove now. I’m cool.

But again, my LA guy friends the other day, were saying that they hung out with me, as a young 20 something year old and back then they thought i was ‘Ooh laa…Ferocia.’

Yet now, almost 20 years on..(they fly in to visit me on occasion,) they’ll just look at me and say,

‘We still cannot believe how beautiful you are. It’s like you’re getting hotter and hotter.’ 

AWWW!!!

How nice is that!!!! Everyone needs to hear it. It’s positive and positive vibes are contagious. I’m so lucky to have such wonderful friends…Real friends. Real ‘life soldiers.’ Hopefully, that will put me in good stead for the future. Hopefully, you’ll take a moment today, at some point, just to tell someone that they’re beautiful.

It makes their day….

Everyone should embrace and adore their beauty. Both inner and out.

But y’know, there’s just something about being older, that FEELS SEXIER, than being young. I find, that, when you’re older your ‘SEXY’ comes from your soul, your life experience. It’s in your eyes. It’s your beauty. Your story.

Everyone has a story, even when you’re young. You just ‘own it‘ better when you’re grown.  When you’re really young, your ‘sexy,’ is still only pinned, glued and stuck on. It’s not real yet. Even in your 20’s, when you think you’re grown.

That’s what i’ve learnt through my 30’s. I’ve also realised that you mellow out, and grown emotionally. You become a wiser human and that alone is SEXY. 

(A young friend of mine sent me a message yesterday, and it put me off them, because… well he used a very young, 20 something year old term, to describe a group of people…in a derogatory fashion. He referred to them as ‘beggy’ and I don’t like that because I think it’s rude. I think it’s judgmental and something that a 30 something would never ever say..Lol. And I guess that’s that’s the difference, between being young and old.)

I’ve learnt so much about people and myself in this last 2 weeks. 

Anyway!!

All sorts has been happening to my friends. I have some finding their ‘bouji,’ and others clinking prosecco glasses. ‘Hustle Barbie’ (who’s Vegan) actually stole a PIG. A REAL PIG from a Butcher, because she didn’t want it to get slaughtered. Shenamed it ‘Elvis’ and it’s now in her house. Lol.

Everyone apparently loves the pig. Yet, I am not a piggy fan. I find their snouts intrusive. Lol. Yet, I admire her love and conquest. She’s filled with utter compassion.

Plus, I adore that she’s going to go out, get drunk, bring back a hot dude, forget she has a pig named ‘Elvis’ and suddenly remember he’s there, when he pops onto her sofa, mid ‘sexy time.’

If a pig came near me during sex, I would DIE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I’d grab my boobies and RUN FOR THE HILLS…NAKED.

I am terrified of animals of the farmyard variety.

TERROR SCREECHES THROUGH MY SOUL.

But on the up, there’s also been new love. My gay friend Liam, (he’s just tinkered off ‘The Extreme Diet Hotel’ show on Channel 4.) Anyway, he recently broke up with his beau and has hit the dating scene with his heart on his sleeve and it’s good to see him happy. He called me before his last date, with a beautiful looking man. They met at ‘Velvet’ in Manchester, for the date and he saw him sat outside drinking a latte.

Me: ‘A latte!!!! On a date!!!!’

Liam: ‘I didn’t want it to be a slaggy date. We’ve  spoken loads & really like him. It’s a non drinking date.’

(I don’t do ‘non drinking’ dates. 🙂 I get so nervous. I need to drink.)

He called me before his date because he was a little nervous. But dates are kinda like that, aren’t they?

Liam: ‘I’ve dressed really casual. is that okay??’

I’m glad, that I was his ‘make me not nervous‘ call. I’m good in those moments.

But they had the most beautiful time. I actually saw a picture of his date, whilst on the train to MY OWN date in Manchester. He was ‘sizzle.’ Really handsome. Really well groomed.  They loved their time together. It was all chatter and leg strokes. Cuddles over calamari. It was a classy afternoon date. But then they had to rush off home, because ‘twinges’ and testosterone kept kicking in…If the date went on any longer….the pleasantries would’ve been X Rated.

I always think that chicks sometimes get offended when a guy wants to ‘sex you up’ on the first date. Yet, you shouldn’t. (I know, it makes you think that they only want sex.) Yet DO KNOW, that they can’t help it. If they fancy you, the WANT, WANT, WANT you. It’s how they’re wired and they don’t mean it offensively. Their willy pops up and that’s it. They go ‘boz eyed’ and need to ‘jab for goals.’

So you can IMAGINE, what it must be like if you’re two GUYS on a date…and you fancy one another!

Hahaha….

‘I’ll have that latte to GO, Bitch.’ 

 

 

 

 

Will you still love me….

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I had such a ‘drama’ Monday, after the most blissful & peaceful weekend of ‘family.’ I’ve got so much going on, that i’m filling myself with a delicious flourish of stress. It’s kinda topped up with that beautiful thing we call ‘anxiety,’ simply because i’m terrified. I don’t even know what’s wrong with me? So, i’m gonna go with hormones?

I’m back on the telly shortly…That’s worrying me. I’ve got a lot to organise with the kids…That’s worrying me. I have shoots galore and auditions coming out my ‘hooty..’ That’s worrying me. My love life is *whizzing* around me, almost madly…I don’t even know what’s going on? Yes. I get a lot of attention. Yes, I’m single.

However, I’m noticing that, if I ever begin to feel for anyone, I get stressed out, because giant *CAUTION* signs go up everywhere. I’ve always had a shit love life. So, it’s scary. Plus,  I’m absolutely emotional, so to me, it only means ‘danger.‘ I do not ever want to get my heartbroken again….EVER. I tread carefully. (Well…fuck that. I ‘stiletto.’)

I have travels and schedules and places to influence…Everything’s a juggle…Sometimes, I panic and I can’t even breathe. (Cue: Drama 😉 )

But the weird thing is, i’m HAPPY. I’m really happy and maybe being so happy, or so lucky, makes me worry because LET ME TELL YOU, my life hasn’t been so easy….Haha. It’s laughable.

Basically, I’m scared of everything right now, because i’m having to pinch myself…and I need to ‘Man up,’ count my blessings and get on with it, with panache.

Anyway…

At the weekend, I did Meadowhall with The Wunna’s and Ruby. (Junior was at his Dads.) We were pretty much treated like Meadowhall shopping royalty (and I thank you for that, because I don’t even know why?) It did feel wonderful though.

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We shopped and stopped at Wagamama’s. Then after cocktail refuels, toy stores, makeup counters, new hair (we all need those extra few inches,) and my brand new chakra beads…Life felt almost perfect.

Ruby: ‘Mum. You’re chakra beads are not working. You’re CRAZY. You’re still nuts. They don’t work.’

(She is right, though. Even though I told her to ‘shush.‘ At this rate, i’m gonna need to see Buddha and get blessed by monks, or something! Maybe i’m just not meant for ‘Total Enlightenment.’ Maybe, i’m meant to live this ridiculous life of pathetic glory, for your entertainment… Haha.)

I’m starting to believe that…

‘Hey Destiny…You’ve fucked me over. You’re off the Christmas card list! You’re chilling on the naughty list, with Cupid and a few Pretty Boy exes from 2004.’

This is how I feel right now…

Like I’ve drank 42 energy drinks, had a bottle of rum, taken all my clothes off, and then thrown MYSELF to the lions.

Then…because i’m not at all mental….

…I lost the car…I always lose the car…Oh! Wait!! I don’t mean?Ugh. I’m rambling. I didn’t REALLY lose the car! I kinda ‘misplaced’ it? Y’know, when you can’t quite remember where you left it? 🙂 My Mum, drove home, because obviously, I guzzled Aperol Spritzies…after The Disney Store.

Fair enough, there was lots of wine, brunches and fun over the weekend. I checked in with my friends…briefly. Got on top of work. Then just relaxed with the kids. However….one of my favourite moments of the weekend, was the ‘school mum..’ catch up…

(There was a kids birthday party over the weekend…)

Miss.Murphy: ‘What are you wearing!?! Lol. Who wears glitter shoes to a kids party..?? Haha.’

Me: ‘Shut up. Lol. These are my driving shoes.’

Sam: ‘Does Ruby want Pizza?’

Me: ‘It’s like the Real Housewives of Yorkshire…’

Mum: ‘I got asked to be on Real Housewives of Marbella, a while ago, but I said no…I’m too boring, for it!’

Me: ‘You said NO! As if you said NO!! I can’t believe you said no. I would’ve moved to Marbella, to have done it. Haha.’

( I live for that show…It calms me, when I’m stressed. Yet, so does the occasional Jeremy Kyle episode…? So, yeah…I’m mental. Ignore me.)

Other Mum: ‘Oh yeah. I’m gonna be flying away with him.’

Miss. Murphy: ‘You’re actually going now! What about…?’

Other Mum: ‘Oh…he doesn’t know..’

Miss.Murphy: ‘You said he was fat and bald…But he’s not at all?’

Me: ‘How have I sat here for an hour and not known it’s your birthday today!!’ 

Miss. Murphy: ‘So, are you seeing your date again?’

I never thought i’d be a traditional ‘school mum.’ Yet, there’s just something about this group of Mamas, that is filled with the ‘sexy.’ They’re actually not traditional, school mums, in rain macs. They’re alive. They’re fun. They have designer shoes that read ‘LOVE.’ Louis Vuitton handbags and possible stables…’

They’re, what I call ‘Prosecco Mums,’ and I love them, madly. I’m like the tragic misfit of the bunch. The single, no husband, disorganized one, with a suggestive Insta profile…

We’re all really different from one another. Yet, w’re all great women. Confident women. Great mothers and well, I just really enjoy they’re company.

Then all our kids ruined everything and shoved tall plastic, slush palm trees, in our faces… 

At that point, the gossip got censored…

My inbox is * pinging,* almost every minute, with people asking me about my love life and my last date etc…

All I can tell you is that, the guy that I did the Manchester Airport date with, was wonderful. He says he wants to see me again, and I definitely will. I found him really sexy and confident. He’s smart and thoughtful. I liked him. I’find him interesting…I want to know lots about him…I’ll definitely be meeting him again. (I’m only one ‘meeting’ in. So it’s all ‘early doors.’)

I’m just treading carefully…Like I said, I’m not bothered about getting my heart broken, right now, when I have so much going on…

I eventually want to fall in love. I’m a true romantic. I want to be swept off my feet. Adored. Respected. And y’know, in that one meet up, my date was that! He was a REAL MAN, which made me notice that I’d not only been looking in the wrong place for love, but i’d wasted a lot of my time, on ‘little boys.’  At 37 years old, I don’t need to be doing that!

When it comes to love…

…this time..because obviously i’ve been married three times and had numerous flings and relationships..I want to PROPERLY fall in love. I want it to be stable and forever…with no stress. No drama.

And I do want to just say, that even though on paper, i’ve dated, romanced, flinged, loved, married, divorced, sexed..and well…just all sorts, with men, all over the world.

DO KNOW THAT….

… I never did all that because I was a floozy. That’s one of the biggest misconceptions about me. I’m a love bunny. There were options. I was young. A glamour model. Off the telly…Growing up in Hollywood…All sorts.

Yet, I never was and still not a man eater. I’m non judgemental. I’m modern. Yet when it comes to love, I’m quite ‘fairytale.’ I’m quite traditional…I’m a hopeless romantic, with a capital ‘H.’

I’m tragic…

So, every single time, I went into these encounters, with men, boys, gents, or misfits..

I always hoped (like any girl or woman,) that they would love me forever.

It just didn’t and still hasn’t quite worked out that way….

It’s actually only when I suddenly realise, that they guy i’ve been chatting to, or dating, only see’s me as  a ‘bed notch’ or someone they daren’t date… It was only THEN…at that point, when I HAVE to  file the encounter under ‘casual,‘ and ‘take it on the chin,’ without being embarrassed.

So i’m accidentally, a sassy, sexy, modern day woman.

The ‘Brand’ goes alongside that….and that’s fine with me, as it makes me very ‘now.’ It gives me the necessary ‘street cred.’ I’m swag. I’m cool…I’m…Blah, blah….

You get it…

Y’see, when it comes to WORK, I am that. I’m fire. I’m determined. I’m ambitious. I’m a glamourous, kitty DIVA, sprayed over, in solid steel, showers of glitter. Champagne pops around me and naughty winks, fill my walk way…

When it comes to love…I’m the opposite.

I’m not someone who really wants random casual sex. I love sex. But i don’t play a numbers game. I want to feeel a connection.

Plus, If i’m honest, I can have sex with anyone… I have an inbox full of offers…almost every few minutes.

That doesn’t make me feel mighty. It’s flattering. I appreciate the ‘adoration..’ Of course I do….

If anything it stresses me out, because I think, ‘how the hell can I have so much attention and not find Mr.Right. That ONE MAN, who will truly love and treasure me forever?’

I’m ready to fall in love…

I’m just scared to….

It makes me anxious…

Anyway…

Away from all that…Sunday morning was great because before Meadowhall, I got to chatter to Lil’ Sam Reece. I shouldn’t call him ‘Lil’ as he’s pretty grown. He’s a good guy.  I’ve referred to him as ‘Tats’ on this blog before.

I like waking up on a Sunday morning to a Reecy phone ‘ping.’ We’ll just have brief morning banter. ..then get on with life. We chatter in ‘spits & spots’ a lot. We both always have really shit love lives…We’re both ‘Yorkshire.’ We actually get on well. It’s easy. We wired the same way. We have the same banter.. This Sunday we talked ‘car bonnets/hotels and flat caps.’ 

I was actually gonna meet him for drinks..But I ended up doing Meadowhall instead and he ended up doing boy drinks…

But he’s a good guy. So I have a lot of respect for our Sam. He’s a good buddy…I’d see Sam as the kinda guy, i’d go for a drink with and kiss in the elevator when no one was looking. Haha!

(That hasn’t happened, by the way, before you all get excited. But i’d definitely kiss him in an elevator…It’d be a waste of ‘sexy’ people, if not. I don’t like to waste sexy people. You only live once.)

Right! I’m off!

Have a fantastic Tuesday!!

I love you.

Chrissie x

ps/ I’m about to step up my game…So strap in!

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Trips to Manchester, To Find Love….

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Did my hair, did my face, did my lips, did my pout, slipped into heels and got myself to the train station, which would delicately deliver me to Manchester airport, in one glamourous piece, ready for my ‘date,’ my ‘meet up.’

Before, we start, I’ll let you know I had the most amazing time. It was almost wonderous. I  wrongly thought that my date was in Liverpool, but it was actually in Manchester. Good job, he reminded me, before I arrived in the wrong city. Lol. He actually FLEW IN for work and then the date… (Bouji, innit. 😉 I like that about him.)

But why am I  so shocking!!!! I couldn’t even get the city right?

Yet, before I even got there, I shat myself with nerves, in my little Missy Empire pink dress. (Thank you for the dress. It was devilish. The little pink dress, is the NEW little black dress.) I stopped off, got two wines at The Mallard, in Doncaster, as @kingkenny1985 (who works there, and loves a Wunna Land insta story) had to *pause* and do a ‘double take..’ with a…

‘I just had to double check to see if it was you…You WILL get yourself into these situations…Lol’

I got to Platform 3B, which takes me straight to Manchester airport, kinda in a jiffy and that was after ‘The Draughtsman Ale House’ handed me a ‘half’ a tipple, to calm my nerves, because they were so excited about my little adventure! (Thank you for that! 🙂 )

(It fell out of my hand on the train, whilst I was messaging Miss.Muprhy and ‘drop poured’ into my OPEN, overnight bag. 😉 )

YIPPPPPPPPEEEEEeeeeeeee!

Everything just stank of ale! 🙂 All you could hear was this random Oriental, faux furred, big haired… idiot, SWEARING under her breath, like an angry, porny looking…ninja.

‘I can’t help it, i’m just drawn this way….’

My date was excited, messaged me the whole way through, to keep me in check, with his whereabouts. He did admit he was a little nervous.

Date: ‘Wow! I’m almost nervous to meet you…Lol.’

(I was ‘dropping fucking drinks’ nervous. But it always scares me when they’re nervous, because I don’t want them to think i’m some kind of goddess, because they’ll only be disappointed when they meet me, i’m sure.) 

Chick friend: ‘Not so adventurous and brave now, are you Wuns! Haha.’ 

Me: ‘Fuck off. I’m STILL l doing it. I’m STILL headed there. I never said I don’t actually feel the fear! Haha.’

He’d organised everything, so perfectly to a ‘T.’ Rooms were booked, everything has been scheduled, sorted and planned out. Almost wonderfully. All he wished for ME to do, was show up,’relax and enjoy.’

It’s almost like I had forgotten, that men like him…actually still existed. 

He’s a miracle. You wouldn’t even believe it. Before I even went on the date….and remember I had never ever met him in person….He had already managed to make me feel like a Princess…That’s the wrong word.

He made me feel appreciated, respected, beautiful and of absolute worth. 

All that ever matters to me, is how someone makes me feel… He didn’t even do it, with intent to manipulate or be showy….He did it, because he’s just built that way, he’s kind. He’s so much fun, but a proper old school gentleman.

I LOVED IT. It makes a guy so so sexy!

I arrived at the airport. I was driven to the hotel…It was raining so heavily outside, which I kinda love, when I know i’m INSIDE. There’s an evening comfort to it.

He arrived much earlier and had to dash off to work. I had school runs etc, so arrived in the evening…I had an envelope with my name upon it, with my room key ready and waiting for me…and with a smile, a wink and shake off of the rain, I was headed up the elevator, into my room…as the rain poured down, over Manchester Airport.

I got settled, took selfies, did lunges (lol) and went down to the bar for a white wine spritzer. The staff couldn’t have been more delightful. I was at The Clayton Hotel. right by the airport. I tottered in with my wink and pink dress…and Life was pretty much sorted from there.

He had just got done at the match….and was en route to meeting me.

The whole way through, he made sure I was utterly comfortable. He’s really organised, so he was telling me the plan, every hour. Lol.

Date: ‘Just order anything you need to eat or drink on the room, when you arrive. Don’t worry. Honestly, just enjoy…I’ll see you soon…’

I got my own drinks at the bar..whilst I waited.  I actually met loads of fun people, who were all off on sunny adventures. The gents loved me in that bar, but the chicks didn’t…and I hate that, because I’m lovely. Lol.

(Girls shouldn’t SCOWL at girls, they do not know. When you do, you lose your swag, your beauty & your level of confidence becomes very visible. Even if you feel it…don’t do it. I’m not there to steal your man, i’m on a flipping DATE!) 

But what can I say…My lil’ pink dress was ‘killer.’

Anyway…

Long story short…

He arrived…I was upstairs in the room…and when the door opened and I saw him…I filled with terror, smiled, (because you just godda charm that shit out) and then just told him that I was nervous.

He smiled…looked at me. He actually *paused* and looked me in the eye. I didn’t know whether to be happy for terrified. Did he think I was hot? Or did he think I was not? Yet, then when I snapped out of my few seconds of utter, charming *panic,* I then looked at HIM…and a calm, warmness sort from him…

Date: ‘Wow, you look great. You’re dressed like that and i’m dressed like this..Lol.  I’ve ordered food to the room…I’ve had such a stressful day, i need a drink. Lol. I’ve also ordered you another wine…’

(He already knew what i’d been drinking at the bar. I like that. It impresses me.) 

Then just like that, we sat down, we relaxed and we just started talking. He sat on the sofa and I sat a little away from him…But I noticed that I’m much more guarded now. I had my arms folded, to accessorize my smile. When I was on my first date with ‘The Swirl’ ages ago…I wasn’t like that, I was all cuddly and kissy…and…banter.

I was guarded that night. Open, friendly…yet nervous about potentially getting my little kitten heart broken…in the future. Yet, that’s not the way to go…You don’t know what’s gonna happen in the future…So, i relaxed, enjoyed by time, the moment and him.

He was alive He’s smart. He’s fun. He’s non judgemental. He knows a lot about people and life. He’s excited by me. He’s a family man. Someone who knows what truly matters to him, in life…

HE DIDN’T EVEN FLINCH, WHEN I TOLD HIM HOW MANY TIMES, I’D BEEN MARRIED ETC… He’s not terrified of me….He’s impressed by me?

He laughed and said…

‘I love that about you…At least I know you’re not scared of commitment, If i ever need to ask….Lol’ 

Then he said,

‘Datings always hard isn’t it…because you can meet a really pretty girl and she has an awful personality, or has no grasp on real life…You’re not like that, at all. I saw that you were a Mum and I loved that about you… I knew that you had real responsibilities and experienced real love…real life…’

OH MY GOD! DREAM!

(He’s also a Father… and I love a family man, don’t I! I also love that he’s bouji, but real. He’s not caught up with bullshit. He’s solid, stable, loving, sexy and a HAPPY singleton. He’s open to love….But would rather be on his own, than be with someone who wasn’t right! Just like ME!!!)

But the more we spoke, the more I relaxed I became. He was so interesting…so calm….

Date: ‘How old are you? God! You don’t look it at all…’

Me: ‘Everyone says that, but I don’t get it. It’s cos you didn’t know me when I was 20.’ 

Then we started eating and sipping our drinks…We started talking about footballers and glamour models and how they kinda have the same sort of job/lifestyle, yet one has the boy version and the other had the girl version…. of the shindig.

Date: ‘I guess, that’s why they always date?’

Me: ‘I just think sporty boys are filled with more testosterone, really. Lol’ 

Date: ‘Hahah. No, but when it comes to our lifestyle etc….Us guys, want to date an exciting girl. A *dangerous* girl. A beautiful girl…A.. ….’

Me: ‘Someone that gets ya juices flowing… I get it… Someone who isn’t Vanilla..’

Date: ‘Yeah. You’re that. You’re dangerous...(he had a smirk on his face, when he said it.) But you’re not just looks, like most…So, i’m almost sat here, hoping you want to see me again…I need to get shower… Hang on…’

Me: Why have you turned the lights off…?’

Date: ‘So I don’t scare you… Lol’

(Only a true vixen isn’t scared in the dark Haha. It’s the light that makes her feel unnerved.)

The rest of the evening was divine. We relaxed. We shared stories. I needed to relax a lot more than he did, if I’m honest. He was confident, caring, he knew life. He’s one of those ‘good at everything,’ guys… But so so humble.

Me: ‘There isn’t anything you can’t do? What are you rubbish at?’

Date: ‘I can’t dance well. I’m an athlete, so I can move…But I just don’t find it easy to dance. Hahaha. ‘

Then because he felt I was tense, he walked his fingers up my back and pushed on parts that he felt were tense.

It was literally the most gentle thing, and it felt SO good.

He was GROWN. He was full MAN. Like, he raised the bar, on what being a true man is! He’s an  actual ‘great at everything,’ guy, with a successful career, who’s a wonderful father/family guy. Someone who’s loving, sexy… and truly truly knows how to take care of a woman…on every level.

He walked his fingers up to the top of my back, just under my neck and pushed his fingers down to release tension….I looked at him, through a mirror…and we smiled…

That was the part where I trusted him…and he massaged me….

The next morning, I woke up at The Clayton Hotel, by Manchester Airport…after the most wonderful time, with the most thoughtful man I had every met.

It couldn’t even be real. It was like a dream….He was IMPRESSIVE. I like to feel impressed, don’t I? And Cupid properly threw in a gem, this time around….It’s like The Gods are trying to show me my options…

I swear…

I literally haven’t met a more generous, or more thoughtful man ever, who is dripping in sex appeal. He’s not even wet with his kindness. He’s charming. But not fake. He’s real. He’s someone you never need to prompt, because he’s always waaay ahead of you. I love that! He’s really intelligent.

(‘Well, we were only working a couple hours a day. There was a lot of free time. In that time, I got a degree…so I could use it later…Most of the guys don’t think to do that. I even speak five languages now…and run two companies…’) 

There’s a sophistication to him, that’s delivered with punctuated fun. He’s not a lose cannon. He’s stable. His feet are firmly on the ground. Yet, at the same time, he’s not ‘vanilla.’

For once, I got to feel like a girl. I got to feel so precious. I got to feel ‘taken care of,‘ instead of ‘having to take care of…’ I know so many women (including myself) who never get to feel like that!

He’s a good person…

Date: ‘I hope you want to see me again…I don’t know what you’re thinking, but I hope so. I’ll message you as soon as I get home…’ 

I can’t honestly have been that lucky?

Haha…it felt so ‘Pretty Woman.’

What is happening in my life right now?

If i don’t see this guy again, I will officially be the stupidest girl in the world. What a gentleman. What an amazing man. I don’t think i’ve ever been treated that well!!

I’m stunned…

I took the 10.53, from Platform 3A at Manchester Airport, back home, with my Red Bull…so I could arrive in time for a school run. 

Cashier: ‘You know it’s £2.90…’

Me: ‘Yeah…but fuck it, I need it..’

 

On my train home…

(After some chick gave me daggers and rammed her luggage on wheels into me. Lol. You can’t *ram* me after i’ve just been Princess treated!)

Miss. (who I love) Murphy: ‘The guys in the office who follow you avidly want to know which………he is? Liam has worked out that… Hahaha. This is hilarious!’

Firmonnell: ‘Did you fancy him? He sounds so perfect. How did it go!!!??!!! He’s sexy!’

Laura Grace: ‘Tell me everything…’

Halewood: ‘What happened!!!! You lucky bitch!’

Man sitting next to me: ‘I feel like i’ve seen you before….? Oh shit! I follow you on insta. How was the…’

Bartender Girl: ‘How was it then!!?!’

King Kenny: ‘How did it all go?’

Sarah T: ‘Who is this guy!!!!’

Big Brother Rex: ‘Must’ve been a good… with ya hair like that! 😉 Hahaha. ‘

 

3.30pm…

Ruby: ‘I’m glad you’re back Mum. How was he?’

 

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Tats, Dates & What I Fancy…..?

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Hiya!!! We’ve made it to FRIDAY!

FRINALLY, Baby!!!

(As my five year old son, Junior..would say. 😉 ) 

Grab ya best nipple tassles and get ya *shimmie* on point!! (Ruby, my daughter, would probably say that.)

It is THE WEEKEND!! (Well, almost.) But it’s important to have a weekend mentality, before it kicks in, because otherwise, you’re not only dull, like the broken custard cream at the bottom of the biscuit tin. You’re also not embracing the excitement, to come and that alone, in Wunna Land…

is a SIN!!

I love Fridays. I don’t know why, because it’s not like I have a Monday to Friday kinda job? I reckon I just enjoy celebrations of any kind. So fuck it. It’s FRIDAY! I’m in. I’m there!

Shake ya…*I’ll let you fill in the blank.*

I’m on rest today, due to my body being on the mend. I know, from my Insta story, it looks like I rest all the time. Hahah. But believe me, they’re just snippets of moments, that are filmed for YOU, either on the spot, but more often than not, FILMED PREVIOUSLY. 😉 A lot of work is going on behind the scenes in Wunna Land right now, with the old glammy career and the jazzy business of life.

That is my business…LIFE.

(..ofcourse done glamourously, with a dash of wit and showbusiness.) 

There’s telly, there’s modeling, running a company and influencing. Now that the babies are beginning to do their ‘ting,’ it’s doubley busy…But by the end of the month, they should be signing up to an agent, which will take a lot of pressure of MOI!

I have so much to do and I didn’t even have my morning GIN!!

‘It’s not like you to do a morning school run, without a wine in your hand, Chrissie. Haha..’

‘Wow, you parked like shit…’

Anyway!!!

Lots of you already know from following my ‘socials..’ But recently, there was a Wunna Fan, that wanted to get my attention, so offered up a game of dares, on my insta story, during my daily ‘Ask Me Anything’ thing. I went in all ‘Big Balls’ and dared him to get my initials tattooed upon him…

Yesterday morning, I found out that HE ACTUALLY DID IT. Hahah. I saw a video sitting in my inbox the evening before. I think it was Wednesday. I didn’t dare even look, so I left it until Thursday morning. Lol.

YESTERDAY, was actually a really good day. I felt really fun! I felt really sexy! I felt really appreciated by everyone. My Insta stories are getting really popular now, because i’m being more playful and putting my back into it, a little more.

Being ME

And as the tale goes, it seems the best thing you can do, is be yourself. I know that sounds cliched. But like I always say, no one in the entire world can do it better. Plus, at 37, I don’t want to be someone who’s always so worried about saying the wrong thing, or censoring the juicy bits, that make me who I am. Some brands don’t like it. Some do.

Therefore, I’m full blown committing to just letting loose and well, knowing what I’m doing. I don’t think people should tell people HOW TO influence something…They already know what works for them, their niche and their audience.

Fuck! I was meant to tell you about the Tattoo guy.

Yes! He wanted to win a date with me…and totally got my INITIALS tattooed on his thumbs!

Chick friend: ‘You literally have the best life…I can’t get my own husband to do the fucking dishes, let alone a stranger TATTOO ME on his thumbs!!’

Hahaha! Love it! Well done, Boy!

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So, now I can either go on a date with him, or subject myself to a dare. (One that he has already given to me, as an option.) 

I don’t ever learn do I? Fun, just gets the better of me…and that’s it. I’m a swine. But, to me, that’s what life is about. No one does it quite as well. Hahaha. I showed Ruby his tattoo and her face just dropped! 🙂 Junior said…

‘Why is he nuts?’ 🙂

Haha…

But, I think, it’s amazing. I was talking to my friend Liam about it yesterday. He’s just come off ‘The Extreme Diet Hotel’ show. I was doing the school run, with my phone to my ear in the playground, waiting for the kids, as I was telling him.

He was telling me about how he met some guy (he’s gay by the way,) in Bristol, bar labelled ‘OMG…’

Liam: ‘Chrissie, it was called OMG! for fucks sake! I saw this guy, he looked young, had a lip ring, so I ordered a jager bomb to be down with the kids and all that. I had to walk off afterward, because when I kissed him, all his friends cheered and I thought gosh, how young is everyone in here? He wasn’t even my type.’ 

Chrissie: ‘You need a man…not a kid. I like A MAN. I’ve dated too many,  not grown yet…..boys…’

Liam: ‘Put it this way, he wasn’t worth jeopardizing my type for…Hahah. I love you  guys, Chrissie…*Well, he’s not really successful and he definitely doesn’t look like he’s stepped off the cover of GQ magazine, but he seems lovely…* Hahahah!’

Chrissie: ‘This is why i’m always single…’

Liam: ‘Shit! You have that date next week, don’t you!?!’

And YES, I DO. But i’m not gonna call it a date, because I don’t know him? In fact, like HE first suggested…It’s a ‘Friendly’ meet up. Makes it sound lovely and less intense. You never really know, until you meet them, do you? A personality is KEY to me and it’s something that you can’t hide in person…even when you try to.

Can’t believe i’ve only just caught this clue…Lol.

I’m a personality girl now, in my old age. Lol. Yes, i’m still shallow. 😉 Yes, I LOVE ROMANCE. However, as long as I find them sexy, i’m good. I’m always gonna go on, how well someone treats me. How they make me feel. He’s been great, so far…He’s really humble and really ..decent to me…

(T Bone, IGNORED my last two messages. Cute. Lol. He keeps posting photos on his ‘story’ …of views. I’M A REALLY GOOD VIEW!!!! Open your eyes! Open your heart! Open…ANYTHING! HAHAHA. 🙂 ) 

But whatever…

Tuesday will be fun! It’s like an adventure and i’ll be heading to Liverpool.

‘The Gent’ (as i’ve been calling him,) has been quite attentive. He sent me a couple voice notes yesterday simply saying that he was looking forward to seeing me. Then he and caught me up, with what he did during the day with his son. (Awww.)

All good! Roll on Tuesday.

I’m in Doncaster all day tomorrow with Ruby & Junior…at The Frenchgate Centre. Hopefully, i’ll be seeing you there!

Ps/ Ruby saw a ‘sexy’ photo of me online this morning, by accident. It was just the one I posted this morning on my Instagram…She I only had stockings and a white faux fur on…and she said…

It’s like…

Thank you for following my diary. Be you. Live it! Do you! Be happy!

Chrissie x

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Dares For A Date, Road Beef & 21 Days..

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Today is ace. Sunday is always my favourite day. It’s like a peach and Malibu cocktail, with a tangy thong of ‘ooh.’ There’s a chilled sweetness to it, isn’t there?

I’m feeling wonderful. I’m looking better than I thought. 😉

*Purr Here…*

I can’t remember if I told you? But i’ve been breaking a bad habit? I might have said it on my Insta Story instead? But, without me going into it, because I’m weird like that (lol.) I’m SO open, about everything, all sorts, literally enough to make you blush and call a Doctor. HOWEVER, if I NEED to ‘conquer‘ something personally, that i’m gonna find a bit of a ‘TASK,’ I’ll always do it privately, under my ‘hush hush‘ brolly, like an insecure, oriental pixie.

(I’ll only tell a couple people, who I know won’t nag me about it. I hate ‘naggers.’ I’m too rebellious, once I hear a ‘nag.’ They get me all guns blazing, with my knickers in a tight, diva twist.)

Anyway. I’ve just passed Day 10, of my ‘breaking’ of bad habit & I’m really proud of myself, because I really didn’t think I could even get this far! Haha. FFs.

First Week Smashed. Ping off that bra and shout a Hail Mary!

I’ve said it before, it takes 21 days to break a habit…COLD TURKEY. (Use this when it comes to anything emotional, physical or mental. It’s a game of will power.)

21 DAYS!

I’m not far off now. So when I get to Thursday Sept 20th… I’ve done it. I’ve hit it. I’ve smacked it’s little booty and winked at it on the ‘naughty step.’ 

I’m actually going to treat myself after that. Like a reward for conquering a ‘glamour pussy’ demon.

What do they say?

‘Strength doesn’t come from doing what you can already DO! It comes from accomplishing the things, you never imagined you could conquer…’

Something, i’ve done all the way through my life. I always say, i wish you could see into my head and witness, all that i’ve seen all through my life.

(Currently getting a Flashback or riding down the escalator, outside Crunch Gym, on Sunset Blvd, in West Hollywood, with Joseph Fiennes, who was in town to film a movie. I think it was ‘Running with Scissors?’ He had a baseball cap on and was telling me he was Irish? Weird time to flash back THAT moment??) 

I was only a 23 year old kid. We’d been flirting for about a day…Lol.

You know what I’m like. I was all a flutter…He just probably thought I was fit…or cute…or whatever? ‘Road Beef’ is what I used to call my LA chick friend Jen. Hahah. (She used to always date these sportsmen. These athletes.  These American football players & Baseball Players.)

I’d always date an Actor, or a model…Yet, only because they were the ONLY guys around me, really….

Jen: ‘I’m driving to Anaheim today..I’m gonna go see him. He’s BBM’ed me.’

Me: ‘Haha. Don’t do that! You’re totally Road Beef. Lol’

(Even though I would do the same. I just wear my little heart on my sleeve and I always have. I like that about me though. I’d rather be that, than be incapable of loving. To me, that’s a travesty. A life without true love, is no life at all.) 

She’s finally happy, settled (Girls settle down much later in Hollywood)  and she’s just had her first gorgeous baby. I’m still…well..probably ‘Road beef’…But with a family…Haha.

I’m headed into a lucky time. A juicy time. A good time of work, excitement and new adventures. You know how much I love an adventure. My spirit is wild. I never want to feel tamed. There’s a lot of opportunity a brewing for us all and it’s making me feel delicious. I have a lot of news and I’ve changed everything around ‘personally,’ for it.

There’s something in the air, in Wunna Land, right now. The babies and I can feel it.

Even Ruby has a glint in her eye…

(She’s like a machine of magic, that girl…She’s grown straight into being….Lil’ Miss.Wunna, I guess? You wouldn’t think, but it’s kinda by accident, because I always encourage the kids, to simply BE THEM. But hey..If the crown fits? 😉 )

I will tell you, that I thought I was gonna have a quiet Sunday of putting my Depop store together. Yet, I got side tracked, because during my ‘Ask Me Anything‘ on Insta…a guy propositioned me to a GAME OF DARES….

I’m up for a dare. Why not? It’s life…

I came straight in…with a…

‘If you get my initials tattooed on you..’ (fyi, I don’t know this guy personally, at all..He’s a big Wunna Land Fan and I love that!) 

He immediately took the challenge,

‘I’m next in Thursday evening for ink, so I’ll film it being done, then send it to you…’

WHAT! WOW!

Then he came back and challenged me…

‘Ok, no problem…But then you’ll have to do my dare…’

If he went through with it….(Do know that it was just banter…I just said it to terrify him…But he wasn’t scared. Lol) I told him he’s win a date, if he did…and he will, if he does…

However, he would have to chose between DATE or Dare.

His Reply…

*Hit Play…*

SO, IT’S ON!!!

I love a challenge. I’m not backing down. If he wins, he’ll WIN A DATE. (Something that as a Wunna Land Fan, he’s requested for months.) If I win, he pretty much said…

We’ll see! Let’s play! I love that he had a sense of adventure. It’s yummy. More guys are scared of me, than they are bold, with me. I like it. There you have it. I’m playing ‘Dares For A Date’ with a Wunna Insta Story Fan.

Makes sense to me! Lol. Yay! SUNDAY!

What did you get up toooooo? 

I’ll be seeing ya! I’ve got work to do…

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Ps/ Junior got a ‘Special Mention Certificate’ on Friday at school. 😉 Miss. Murphy (who I love,) sent me a message, after reading my blog. (Our babies are in school together…) Her baby son Ray, told her, that Junior got called up for his mini certificate, but was too terrified to walk up and receive it. His best, school buddy friend, saw this and walked him up there, to help him feel bold. Awww! How magical! It melted my heart. It gave him all the confidence he needed. I love Miss. Murphy…He’s like the liquor in your cocktail..Not just the garnish. 😉

 

 

 

New Dates, Mates & Old Flames…

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LA Bestie: ‘How the hell are you still alone’

Me: ‘Haha. Wow! Cheers. Stop saying ALONE at me. I’m fine. FFs.’

LA Bestie: ‘I actually meant ALIVE. Lol. I really did.’

Me: ‘Oh? That…I definitely don’t know! Just lucky aren’t I. 😉 I need a fresh orange juice..’

LA Bestie: ‘What?? Honestly. What has happened to you?? Dead to me. Orange juice?’ 

Me: ‘IN MY MALIBU, you idiot. I don’t order juice.’

How’ve you all been? I’ve had to take a few days off blogging, because work, auditions. socializing, surprises, shocks and single mum life sped into a WHOLE different lane and I was pretty much slow jogging in stillettos behind. If i didn’t hit *pause* I would’ve lost the plot!

I like to keep on top of things. I’m not one to lag behind with ease… 

I hate not managing things appropriately. It stresses me out.

So yeah, right now, my life’s not easy.  I’m happy. But it ain’t easy. It’s a really hard juggle, to be honest. But THANK GOD, i’m back to ‘tipper tappering’ at my laptop, because I swear, it’s my saving grace. (Well, once I get my ‘swing’ back, anyhow. At first it’s shit and definitely feels like it needs rum cocktails pouring all over it.)

RUM TING PLEASE…

I’m just gonna jump the gun and tell you that I got this voice note, the other day, that followed a message. Remember I told you that a few weeks ago, a guy, a lovely older gentleman, had tinkered into my DM’s.

I’ve hardly ever been on a date with anyone older than me…I don’t know why? Maybe because my surroundings are always young. The last older guy, that I actually went on a date with…was Matt Dillon..whilst I was in LA. 

Crackers innit!

(Wait, I’ve lied. both ‘London Business Man’ and ‘Eton Mess’ were older than me. Yet, only by a couple years…They kinda seem boyish in comparison to the ‘voice note’ guy Yet, they’re both happily in relationships now…& I’m happy for them, as they certainly weren’t right for me. I can be treated better than that.) 

ANYWAY….The Gentleman..

He initially messaged me with a picture and then a couple voice notes…and I liked it, because hearing someones voice makes a difference. (Not my awful voice though.) But it’s true…A voice or a video helps a connection… doesn’t it?

I felt that he was SO polite and gentle, yet sweet and fun. He was really respectful. He wasn’t smutty. He led with his romantic foot forward. And I am ever so used to hearing smut, or the game of charm.

I mean, remember that also a couple weeks ago, a German footballer, slid into my insta DM’s…and was pretty much the opposite. He started with the usual ‘you’re beautiful’ stuff…then led it straight to the land of Smut.

I get that…it’s fine…However…

..at that point, I just ignored him…cos whatever…I’m too old for that shit.

Anyway, the other guy, who I always label a ‘gentleman.’ (I say label, because I haven’t actually spoken to him much and I’ve certainly never met him.) Back to the point..He sent me a message at the weekend…Was it Friday? AGAIN, followed by a voice note.

I like a surprise voice note..or video.

It helps me connect faster…(I’ve said that already, haven’t I?) 

Weeks ago, and I did blog this, he had asked if I’d like to go on a ‘friendly dinner,‘ with him, to ‘say hi, properly.’ He doesn’t live in the country, yet obviously he ventures to the UK quite a lot with work. His occupation…Pundit. He’s a retired footballer.

I should balls and a nets for my yard of milkshake, as it seems they’re the only guys that want to play Wunna Land, right now? They find me..

So, I get this message, at the weekend, saying that he’ll be over here on 18th…for work and it would be lovely to meet me.

Wow! Impressed!

I get asked out quite a lot…(that isn’t meant to sound conceited…it’s just the truth and we love a bit of truth in Wunna Land.) I always say ‘no.’ Or just ignore the message. I mean, I must be a sucker for eternal loneliness, because I definitely would love to find my Mr.Right, yet I ignore everyone who DM’s me. Lol.

It’s because i’m a happy singleton.

I’m never miserable about single life. I enjoy life. I still enjoy love. I’m just one of those chicks, who is sure my Knight will saunter up out of nowhere…one day, when he’s had his tea and ready. 

Fate will force him to…

Anyway, I haven’t ignored this ‘gentleman.‘ I need to give him a nickname, don’t I? That’ll come. Yet, bottom line…I’ve agreed to go meet him for ‘friendly dinnering,’ simply because he was so utterly and sincerely sweet to me via voice note. He treated me really normally, yet like a lady. He sounded nurturing and I love nurturing ‘I’ll keep you safe ‘ kinda men.

So, we’ll see what happens…I’m open to it..

I feel like i’ve had this really fun Summer of debauchery and irresponsible, sunshiny behaviour. We’ll all remember Summer ’18. It was fun. Yet, I kinda miss focusing on what i’m doing. Glamorously, of course.  I love what I do and I love what I have…and I’m really lucky, to have the mini opportunities, come my way…Hopefully, one day, the mini ones, will turn into BIG ones.

If i’m being honest…

I kinda started to feel stifled, over the last couple weeks and I’ve been on the search for excitement and adventure. A new chapter, with more balance. You’re a product of your environment..I was becoming one…and not being a chick to enjoy the ‘same old ting,’ I got my balance sorted.

I found me a new chapter..

(…and it took nothing but determination.. Something I am oozed in.)

I’ve been with my family. (My strength.)  I’ve been with the kids. (My world.) I’ve worked hard, (my passion)… auditioned lots (my challenge)..and still managed to cocktail my way to happiness, whilst being over eyelashes, boobied and fully lipped. (Just who I am.)

Let’s *clink* wine glasses to that!

Summer 2018, was really important to me, because I learnt a lot about myself…and I was actually a little broken hearted, through it. Hence why I celebrated, enjoyed and drank a lot. Well, I say broken hearted…but I began with a solid stance. Then emotionally ventured to ‘all over the place,’ which led me to naughty fun (because of course I’m that way inclined..) and was left with my eyes open...WIDE open…my ears a listening (they could hear everything once more)…and as I screwed my head back on, bundled up my heart strings, back into my hands, ready for the next round of blissful, romantic tugging…I realized that my mind, my gut…my body…my everything…just kept lulling back to, reflecting back to…and utterly missing….(back to…lol)…..

..The Swirl.

(Who I renamed ‘T Bone.’)

So, I know that i’m not gonna to go through life, without encountering ‘T Bone’ again…I mean, I might do? But I doubt it, because we get on so well…

My gut just tells me…

Yet the timing of it all…. ‘our ting,’ has always been off. Life has never cut me some slack with that old timing shindig. But I’m willing to see and willing to wait on it.

Right now, he’s no where near me, he recently moved to another country for work…and he’s pretty focused on that and doing his version of life out there.

So, now that i’ve done my Summer of ‘heartache’ (lol…a heartache, that I didn’t realize was happening…) I’m pretty ready to explore…and let my little kitty eyes, take a peeky and who else, of DECENT POTENTIAL…that i’m attracted to… is a knocking?

Right?

September 18th…’Friendly dinner,’ here I come…

Ps? I keep getting a Flashback of Ms.Derry, being sat on the  ‘door wide open’ loo, with her leopard print shorts down by her ankles, as she wee’d, told me she fractured her hand, because she fell, whilst flamenco dancing down the pavement. She was in those shorts, that night too.

Then she wiped up, jumped up, pulled this make up stamper thing, out of her hand bag and stamped my hand with a tiny, black love heart.

It was beautiful. Made me smile.

Be beautiful always…

Drunkies, Messages & Shock UPs!

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I couldn’t sleep at all last night because Ruby’s away on holiday and Junior was at his Dads. My mind couldn’t settle because the two beings, that make my heart worth it, weren’t by my side. It’s mental, because when they’re there all the time, they literally drive me nuts. Yet, as soon as they disappear…GOSH, I DO miss them, madly.

I’m not arsed about doing life on my own.

Give me love, family, a team, a partner…anything? Just give me energy. Give me great people. (The shit ones, i’m not bothered about having around me. Lol.) 

I went out for an early tea, had a couple drinks, watched the Leeds game, with my mates Webbo & Scott. (Who chucked a ‘find your phone,’ bleepy thing across a car park, because it reminded him of his ex wife.)

Last night, I actually learnt how much sex means to a man. How much ‘feeling adored‘ means to a guy.

It was a good night..

I felt tipsy and when i’m tipsy, I have the worst night’s sleep. I have no clue why? I’ll just toss, sweat and turn in my sheets, naked, as my head fills up, with the weirdest dreams ever.

It’s shit!

The good thing is I shocked myself up 6:06 am. I felt awful, dehydrated, my head killed and I had the worst stomach ache. So I ended up naked dashing to the loo, half blind, only to grab a length of tissue, pat down my brow and crash again.

The next time my eyes opened….and they opened to shouting, was at 8:03am…

At 8:03am, I felt fine. I literally felt amazing. So, I figured, I was really lucky, because The Gods had given a second shot at figuring out Wednesday. 😉

You’ve godda thank life for those moments…

Anyway, I actually had an exciting phone call yesterday, which got me ‘juiced’ for potential ‘good times.’ I don’t know what’s gonna happen, but hopefully wonderful things? We’ll see…everything happens for a reason.

Even though I was chipper, I got kinda bored yesterday and drank loads because if it.  Boredom’s a swine for that, innit? Boredom and I are not good friends. I spent my life getting myself into trouble because of Boredom. Then he teamed up with Cupid…and ruined things over and over again for me. Lol.

I did ALWAYS look GOOD though…. whilst getting into trouble.

I mean, The Devil DOES wear Prada. 😉 

But yes, good news phone calls. A lot of work is going down. A lot of looking around, at people and feeling that I’m about to shimmie into another new chapter. Everyone looks like their stuck in a life rut? Me however, I’m feeling lucky girl. I’m still poured over with attention. Influencing & blogging are going fabulously.

Jodie: ‘You should get paid more because I ONLY booked the Kitty Cafe, after seeing your post..’

( I love that. 🙂 I love influencing. It gets my ‘jiggy’ all a jolly.)

Everyone always asks me how or why influencers, bloggers & vloggers get paid? The above…is exactly why! 

I’m an old school girl, with a new school career…and it’s juicy! I’m almost ‘traditional,’ with a modern day twist by nature…and I love it because it makes me feel really whole. Makes me feel really well rounded.

I’ve learnt everything the hard way. Yet that’s how you learn. I’ve never given up. I’ve known that getting past the struggle is what makes you develop. I’ve always given up in love however…(Which i find weird.)

Someone asked me yesterday…why I thought I was 37 single, with 3 marriages under my belt and two babies, to two different fathers…and I paused….thought a little while and replied with a simple..

‘I really don’t know?’

I’m that tragic, I have no clue? Lol. Is it because i’ve lost all hope now? Is it because i’m an egomaniac? It is because i’m so romantic, that I’ve lost myself in a haze of ‘pretend it’s not happening?‘ Is it because i’m shit at coupling up? Or is it because i’m so picky?

Who knows???

It’s just my story and if I tell you the truth…I love it. If I didn’t have that story, i would never have been able to start building a little Wunna empire…There’s a happy ending in it for me, one day. I’m sure? Well I fucking hope! Hahah….

ANYHOW!!

I have excitement on it’s way to me and being made with adventure in my bones…I’m ready for it. I’m living with a sassy kink in my step and i’m loving it. I’m doing me and doing it well. Something’s due. I have a cocktail dripped feeling for it and my gut feeling is exactly on point, right now. It’s so good, it’s sexy.

Scott: ‘I love it when you say you can feel it in your bones…Haha.’

So, right now, I’m kicking off my kitten heels. I’m still answering all your questions on my Insta story, right now...(@chrissiewunna.) Tinker over. Get involved!

If I miss your questions, it’s not deliberate… I’m literally inundated with quezzies…So, i’m picking them at random…

(I had to freestyle a poem about DICKS today! How was YOUR Wednesday.)

Shit!!  forgot to tell ya! Yesterday evening… I received three voice notes from a gentleman…I’ve never met him, but he’s intorduced himself to me previously and i’ve chatted to him briefly via voice note! He just seems so grown and so lovely? Maybe I need that? We’ll see…

Anyway, godda go. I’m chilling with Junior and I now have an 11am audition, in the morning…

Thank you for following my life…

Chrissie x

Flirts, Single Life & Custard…

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Yesterday was so much fun. Was it yesterday? Yeah…yesterday! I’ve literally been all over the land, working my merry tinker of a booty off and I’m feeling really lucky. I’m knackered though. God! It’s been trains, travel, bars, restaurants people, social media and deadlines…NON STOP. But i’m loving every second and I’m counting my lucky..stilettos?

They say, ‘Hard work pays off,’ and slowly, but surely, when it’s your turn to shine…it will. Everyone’s always in some kind of race…and you don’t need to be. You don’t need to compare yourself to someone else. They may be on Chapter 20, when you’re only on Chapter 1. ..and that’s fine. Just be inspired, hone your talent, enjoy every minute and push forward, whilst concentrating solely on what YOU’RE doing.

People will talk. LET THEM. 

Chrissiewunna.com ONLY became popular via people talking & gossiping about me. 😉

You’ll make your dreams come true, if you give the world something of value.

People never post their failures online…They tend to only talk about them, once they’ve made it big.  The good thing about this little blog, is that you live my triumphs and failures as I go along…

It’s human nature..

But preach over…Let’s chat…

I hardly slept at all yesterday. Ruby’s away on holiday with her Dad. Junior had an evening with his Father last night also.  I was all on my own, with my flipping meditation app and hated every second of not having the kids around me. (I like hearing them screaming in the background.) 

I’m so lucky right now, because I never feel alone, because of them. However, I dread to think what life would be like, when i’m really really old, if I stayed single and alone forever? I’m just not that kind of person. I don’t want that.  I don’t deserve that. I want to feel love and give love always. I’m just not willing to settle for ‘Mr.Anyone,‘ for the sake of ‘just because.’ I’d rather be alone than ever be with someone who wasn’t right!

I want that magic. That unconditional love that swirls through two people, who can’t help BUT be soul mates..

And i’m sure i’ll find it…It’ll pop out of nowhere, when I least expect it to…But like I said, I’m in no race. I’ll do my own story, at my own pace…I have absolute faith in my own version of life. I never know what’s going to happen to me in the end, I just know it’s going to be something wonderful…

I bumped into Passionate Jaz, Baby Tom & No Knicks yesterday afternoon, at the pub.

SUNDAY FUNDAY!

It was ace. Passionate Jaz, was hungover and needing carbs to survive another hour of life. She had fallen asleep on a really comfy bin, in town, enticed ‘Baby Tom’ with her sexiness..

‘You’re definitely *getting some* when we get home. 😉 ‘

Baby Tom, IMMEDIATELY orders a taxi (woo’ed by the debauchery.) He gets them home, straight away, at the speed of ‘I definitely have a boner’ light.  Then ONCE HOME,  Jaz, tells him off….

‘If you dare come near me or in this room…’

(Hahahah)

..and so he ends up just sleeping on the sofa, cuddling a bottle of Jack Daniels. Lol.

I love them. They’re my favourite couple. I love hanging out with them…and watching them eat nachos.

Jaz: ‘I do like custard?’

Me: ‘I like custard..’

Jaz: ‘I like rice pudding with jam on me..’

Tom: ‘Oh yeah. Her ship was leaking..Lol’

Jaz: ‘I was definitely on the sinking ship. His friends didn’t like me…’

Me: ‘I don’t  like Ben because he lied about me..’

No Knicks: ‘My ex cheated on me..’

Jaz: ‘Stop dating people you work with!’

Me: ‘It’s never really a good night if someone isn’t hysterically crying for or kicking off..’

Tom: ‘Owt for Nowt..’

Me: ‘There’s literally A MILLION SINGLE MEN in they city of LEEDS, ALL looking for love. Why can’t you find ONE, that DOESN’T work with you??

Tom: ‘I’ll have a pint of Peroni please..’

Jaz: ‘I want a Jam Roly Poly now…’

No Knicks: ‘I hate that i’m single…Please tell me that it’s going to be okay, because i’m 29, never been married with no kids.’ 

She’ll be fine though. I mean, ’29, never been married with no kids,’ is a much easier sell, than..

‘Hi. I’m Chrissie. I’m 37. Been married 3 times, oh and I have two babies… to two different guys.’

That is my first date banter…because I always feel like I need to get it out in the open STRAIGHT AWAY. I let THEM take it from there..Lol

I remember being sat in ‘The Swirls’ (do I still call him ‘The Swirl’ or should I call him ‘T Bone?) Anyway, it wasn’t this Easter, but the Easter before and I was sat on his sofa, after sex…in his apartment in Ipswich, with ‘Dinner Date’ on as telly background and to our right, was a GIANT canvas picture, with a half naked, abstract artsy lady painted on it. The canvas was LEMON and the lady seemed to be dancing? She looked all FREE….

T Bone: ‘That’s not mine. It was already here when I moved in.. Lol.’

Anyway, I told him the 30 something, married loads of times, two babies, to two different daddies spiel…

I did my usual *pause* afterward…(I always do it, to scan their face…)

The 30 something thing, didn’t bother him. He’s a younger 30 something than me. And even though he did look, a little taken a back, by my story…for a second…

He paused, tried to say something humourously sensible at me…Then pointed at the tv….in fact at Kim Kardashian, because an E Network Advert had come on…and said..

‘It’s only like her. She’s been married a couple of times…I think you’re great girl. I think you’re lovely.’

Smooooth. 😉  It was sweet of him to refrain from being judgemental. The less judgemental a guy is, the more i’m going to fancy him.

Me: ‘Well, it’s my story. I can’t help my story or my past. There’s nothing I can do about it, so people kinda just have to either love me for it or lump it..’

Anyway….

How did I get so distracted???

The rest of the yesterday, I sat with a table of guys…who were all on the gin after the races. A really good set of lads. Some were better at banter than others.. Then ‘Stringer’ sang ‘Hero’ by Enrique Iglesias, IN SPANISH…lovingly, into his fruity gin…

He was actually AMAZING…

He sang EXACTLY THIS…into his gin…whilst ordering Dominos.

Then we talked about Stag Do’s. How I was accidentally on HIS stag do. KatyP came back from a BBQ, with Golfer Jonny, the MOST PISSED I had ever seen her...Lol.

‘Holy shit! What happened to you, in that time???’

I hugged everyone…Then it was home time…I got home. Stripped down naked. Turned out the lights and online stalked the people I fancy, in bed… after Peroni’s. (Haha. Tragic. 😉 )

This morning I woke up from a Snapchat message from Big Brother 9’s Rex Newmark, who’s actually really good friend of mine. He pretty much said my outfit made me look like I was headed to a ‘rodeo’ 🙂 and then we mutually agreed that I looked like a hooker..

Rex: ‘Both good choices. Never a wives favourite though. Haha.’

Me: I’m NEVER a wives favourite!’

Rex: ‘When are you back in London. I want you to visit some of my restaurants…?’

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Naked Snacking, Castings & Hormones..

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This is how glamourous I am. I mean, everyone thinks that I wake up on a morning, throw on my diamante encrusted robe and get carried to breakfast, in nothing but heels, by half naked Greek male models in togas, with six packs.

I WISH!

Last night, I sat on my bed at around 1.30am, because I was too excited to sleep, with a ripped open packet of prawn cocktail crisps, a ripped open packet of salt and vinegar crisps..a raw green chilli as a side, as I swigged a mini red wine, out of the bottle, in front of my bedroom mirror.

Dirty Nicole: ‘You’ve kinda made that sound glammy?’

It was sort of like the Matrix, if you were snacky and it was a budget porn. Instead of the pills, I chose crisps. Instead of the creepy phone call…I swigged wine. Instead of black cape like coats…I wore nothing.

So basically…nothing like The Matrix, at all?

Hahaha! Hey! Ho!

Wednesday turned out to be a dream, in the end, after a dodgy start. I’ve been influencing…yes. But i’ve been going on a lot of Castings. There’s a lot of new shows coming out and I’ve basically, been on the audition rounds…with everything crossed.

But i’ve got really excited again. I love it so madly.  That’s why I couldn’t sleep. I was on the phone to America, about some show n the early hours of the morning.

I’m an entertainer at heart…nothing makes me happier.

However, I was kinda really stressed, for moments yesterday, but because i’m hormonal. I must be getting my period soon. I can tell because I’m enjoying eating everything I can and I would never EVER do that… in probably a zillion years.

Plus, I wanted one of those ‘Crying to Sam Smith’ baths, that ‘Passionate Jaz’ suggested. She apparently, gets into a RED HOT bath, and with the door closed, plays Sam Smith tracks, alone…and then CRIES. Lol I love it!!

Yippppppppppeee!

‘Yoooooooou SSSAAAaaaaaaY, you love meEEEEee…’

(..as you glug under..)

I decided against having one. I had an ace time with my babies instead. We had a great night. I’m loving being Mama. Ruby & Junior are literally the funnest people I know.

I’m not kidding, when I say that…

Some of my grown up friends aren’t even NEARLY as emotionally stable or confident as they are. Let alone as ACE! Probably because my mates didn’t have the delight of having ME raise them. 😉

Miserable swines.

Then I got called ‘Stuck up.’ (Dull.) At least i’m not ‘Vanilla.’ I’d rather be the absolute WONDER that I am, than a plain old Ryvita. It’s always the people with no excitement in their life, that hate on the ones, that have a GUST in their sails, a GIGGLE  in their wink.

I’m FAR FROM stuck up. You’d know that if you met me.

(Don’t get me wrong, I’m feisty…but what glamour puss isn’t. In fact i’m more polite, than I am feisty always!! Yet, I’m a lot of fun!)

I’m more big headed than I am stuck up. Maybe you got it mixed up? But that’s the truth. I’m humble and kind, yet I don’t think there is anyone, in any form of entertainment, that ISN’T a little big headed and ‘LOOK AT ME.’ 

IT’S OUR JOB.

There’s another Insta Question, that’s come in also, rambling on about my past and whether i’m ashamed of it!!!???!!!

‘Rolls Eyes.’

WHAT!! 

I’ve done really well for myself!!

Ashamed? Why would I EVER be ashamed of my past! I’ve had the most colourful, wonderful experiences so far…If anything I’m grateful, that i’ve been alive! It’s all part of my story and i’m proud of what I’ve achieved, how I’ve developed and glad that I’ve documented every single moment. I lived life with bells on and got up to all kinds of naughty. But I don’t care, because it has all contributed to who I am and what stand for today!!!

Rant Over.

(Techincally, I did say ‘Ask Me Anything.’)

 

Tony Boney: Y’know, there’s this new bracelet out that holds wine…’

Me: ‘It reminds me of a She Wee.’

Toney Boney: ‘Eh???’

Lucy: ‘You drink out of it, from your wrist…Not piss into it, from your vagina..’

Bottom line, it’s shocking and reminds me of She Wee, but for your mouth? I don’t know why? I’m just creative.  I mean,  I’d like booze on my wrist…if it was bouji. But really how much wine could you actually fit into, a WIDE wrist bangle.

Not enough for any normal human, Jesus or Ru Paul! 

Plus, it’s not very dainty is it? It’s just…alcoholism at it’s finest.

‘I’ve run out of wine…’

‘Here… there’s some on my fucking wrist.’

Gross!

But stop press!

Did you know that i have blogged for about FIFTEEN YEARS and that CHRISSIEWUNNA.COM has been going for TEN WHOLE YEARS,THIS YEAR! 

It’s my 10 year Anniversary and later on in the year, i’m going to be celebrating it…and THANKING all those who have helped my story come alive. (The first five years of my blog, I wrote in LA, on Myspace, on other people’s computers. Lol) 

Anyway, I’m going, I need to do my face, take a few Insta pics and then grab a quick drinks. I’m gonna make ‘Golfer Jonny’ (KatyP’s boyfriend,) feel my specs up and mould them to my face.

Kinky.

I’m in Leeds, tomorrow, meeting Blackhouse and then I’m headed to Tattu.

Have a great Wednesday.

If I leave you with anything…I’ll tell you that it only takes 21 DAYS to break ANY HABIT! 

All my love,

Chrissie x

Ps/ I’ve just got a DM from my friend Kyle…

‘How many thirsty guys popped up to that photo?’

(The one above. Lol)

Awww…and Firmonnell’s sent me a morning Video snap, saying she misses me. Why can’t guys be just like her!!!!