Sweaty Betty’s, No Sex and Sangria


I’m here! I’m here! I’ve not gone anywhere. I just haven’t really found time to bust out a blog, as i’ve been utilizing my free time with  fun, Motherhood and friendship. Sometimes in blogsville, this happens…as we need fodder to blog about. I can’t even remember what’s happened or where I left off? I mean, did i tell you that I did ‘Biggies’ on Saturday, after storming out in red boots because i needed a release? Then I worked, worked, worked…did The Carleton with Ben Dodge and Andy…did The Bridge…and then last night did The Carleton for a couple again…all during the time when the day turns to night, which is favourite time of day EVER….

So basically, inbetween work, (which is sucking balls right now) and being Mama…(which is always awesome..even when it sucks balls) i’ve been drinking happy evening drinks (my favourite pastime with Ben, Andy and Dodge. Boy talk is always about food, cars, food, computer games or mechanical objects…yet then i shout of them with my ‘rolling eyes’ and make sure they remember I’m a glamour puss. They love me. 🙂 )

I don’t even remember what i’ve told you and what i haven’t. But i will tell you that I FUCKING LOST MY BANK CARD.

Yes! Serves me right! Decided to go on a cheeky Pontefratc, spontaneous drinking session, because all babies had gone to ‘daddies.’ had so much fun. Fell on the floor, AGAIN in ‘Biggies’…lost my fucking bank card!!!! I still don’t have it yet, but luckily, i’ve managed to have big shouty session with the shit hole that is Natwest…yesterday was a shitty day in general because it was one of those days where in which i woke up did my face, wiggled, winked, pouted at my mirror image…then JUST GOT FUCKING BOLLOCKED ALL DAY…BY EVERYONE! (And i don’t mean fun bollocked, as getting teabagged by everyone i met, would’ve had least humoured me right now. But instead, i literally got shouted at by every sweaty human on the planet, who i just so happened to cross paths with. I’m not that used to such behaviour, because in general, most people are usually lovely to me, or telling me i’m ace…lol. So being shouted at pissed me off…and mainly because it was on repeat! (*Hashtag Dickheads*)

Other than losing y bank card. (I was poor Monday night for drinks, but i did the honourable thing purchased things that could be shared by all. I’m good like that and literally the most generous kitten on the glitter block.) Tuesday, I figured out a way to access my money because i couldn’t get to it due to my work schedule! The shouting did me good, because it made me turn mighty and all pissed off and when i’m like that I will do ANYTHING in make something work for me!! I WILL WIN..and i did. Tuesday night rocked! 🙂

Anyway, away from all that I also TOOK a vow of CELIBACY! Yipppeee! Now, i don’t know who you’re meant to take this vow with.. is it Cupid, The Good Lord, yourself, or your vagina? But I took one…all i’m going to say it that LAST TIME I took such a vow…and this was in LA….the last time i took a vow of celibacy because i was soo cik of men and constantly making the wrong boy choices…i broke the vow within 24 hours. 🙂 (I think it was with my ex husband…I can’t remember? But i rememebr walking into DK’s appartment with a cum stain on my ‘I break heart’s on a daily’ t shirt.’ He just laughed and rambled on about what he had eaten or drank all day. Theo once found me moaning about men in a corner….and when our other friend arrived, all he said to him was, ‘don’t mind her, she’s crying over a penis…she’s not bothered that they’re not together anymore, just sad that she won’t see his penis enlargement ever again. HAHAHA.’ (True story. I didn’t like him because although he treated me well,….very well, he forgot to tell me that he had a wife and children. I found out by his wife finding me on the street with Ronnie.)

Anyway, my vow of celibacy is going good for me. 🙂 I’ve banned myself from romance and it’s all going well. I’m ‘the one’ for me. Yippeee! (*Should pudda riiiing on it.*)

Today all i did was sweat like a fucking pig. Being at work and doing rubbish, boring things in the hottest July England has EVER experienced is shit. I never ever sweat because my body never works hard enough. Today it sweated for the first time and it was disgusting. I got sooo tired even my legs were wibbly. I WAS EVEN IN FLATS!!! (The devils work.)

Now i’m home with a wine, the babies are bathed and bedded. I’m blogging, eating and probably needing to reshower. I have one more day of work…which will be hard in this heat  (I love the heat, but hate working in it) then i’m off, off off and I can’t wait…because I am soooooooooooooooooo excited for my Friday with Ben and Dodge! It starts with Rubes too which makes it even more awesome. Ben’s on about gammon. Dodge is feeling sangria’s and I’ve got this fun bus that no one usually gets on fast enough!

See ya!
love you!

Will blog more!

So tired. x



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