Popadoms, Players and Turner’s


Happy Monday morning to all you delicious *peeps* of an eye, around this merry world, who have accidentally, or hopefully intentionally found themselves a ‘click-click-scrolling’ their way into my jolly old bundle of Wunna Land. Welcome. (I’m currently in my living room, in my glasses. Keiran’s ventured off to work, after telling me i look ‘cute.’  But really and like i told him after porridge making…i fricking look like a ‘goober.’ He did an impression of me, that consisted of a funny voice, me being BLIND & then finally being able to see, after clumsily and eventually finding my sight.) I’m obviously the sexiest girl on the planet.

This is the first Monday, in a very loong time…aside from the time my beautiful ‘hubby to be’ Keiran took me to Oulton hall on my rather Decemebery birthday, that i have actually felt AMAZING. I spent the whole evening rocking my baby Ruby, nursing a hangover, tending to my ‘handsome’ and being up most of the night, due to early teeth making their way into my bambinos *ouchy* mouth and i’ve weirdly never felt better. I’ve made porridge, i’ve prepped for the nursery run and i’m finally once again committing my life to the things i adore, which is love, family and entertainment. Life is good. I never thought i’d finally get here! Yipppee! *happy dance here*

Okay, so, the weekend was great. Grooming, giggling and then finding my pretty self in a car on the way to Aagrah (Doncaster) with my Handsome Keiran, for a bit of ‘Wunna family’ love, over popadoms, fireworky desserts, wine, sambuca and Korma. It was busy and a bustle, full of life, love and excitement. Keiran’s become a delicious addition to The Wunna family and well anytime my parents not only love my ‘arm candy’..yet also regard him as a son, then you know you’ve done well. Baby Ruby tended dinner also (even though she did get mildy obssessed with a ‘far too old for her’ 7 year old boy, who proceeded to perform the ‘gun show’ at her. *Rolls eyes.* I guess the apple doesn’t fall far from the tree. Keiran is teaching her how to do a *cat hiss*..with a fucking claw. I’m not happy about this. Lol. I mean she’ll have it hard enough anyway having to be raised by a tragic Wunnary mother & a spray tanned handsome with an ‘ego’ strut…let alone being the asian baby who does a claw at people at nursery!!!!) I take that back. We are honestly the best parents EVER!

Lots of love, banter and fun occurred over dinner. I mean we actually got to meet the guy to owns every single Aagrah going. I love meeting people who have achieved something wonderful in their life. I’m inspired by them and well simply because not only did they turn something little, into something big, but they wave the flag for the notion that ‘dreams come true.’ There is nothing in my life that i’ve said i was going to achieve that i haven’t yet. (Apart from the time i thought i was going to be a popstar. 🙂 This producer in LA, that i used to never fancy, yet kiss by Hollywood wheely bins after vodka, who at the time was a little boy with a dream, yet now produces for R Kelly..is currently trying to make me do it. Now that i’m an oldie, i don’t have it in me. Popstardom is for the young and fruitful. I have tits and this uncanny knack of documenting my life via written word. For once i’ll stick to my strengths. The only singing i’ll be doing is after a bottle of rum, shamefully, in high heels during kareoke, in a shower or in the car. Infact Keiran and i have plenty a ‘sing-a-long’ in the car no matter what route to life we’re on. One minute we’ll be giggling, looking at our mirror images or talking about life and the next he’ll be cranking up the radio and well there we are, telling the world in a melodic and  somewhat free fashion that we’re ‘gonna pick up the pieces and build a lego house.’ We do the faces and everything. Y’know really ‘put our backs’ into it, like there’s a potential single in the making. Lol. #tragic

Anyway, i got distracted. After dinner and via text we got invited to pop along to the home of ‘Turner in the backgrounds’ home for drinking games, cuddles and a weird chav boy, who actually underneath it all is a good boy, yet needs to not be 18 and needs to not pretend he’s the biggest player going. Pulease! Boys like that are tragic. But he’s young so he’s okay. When a young gent has a front of ‘player-player’ i always know that they’re the easiest pull, because all they acutally want is to be cared for…properly, but the right way. I mean, young boys see ‘player-player’ as cool. Glamour pussy girls never ever like that in a boy and simply because we get hit all of the time, due to all the wrong reasons. We hear it a lot and it’s boring. (Oh look another boy who only wants to fuck. *Yawn.*)  When i go out or go anywhere, i never ‘put it out there.’ Why because i don’t have too. Infact, a guy on a balcony once taught me that if you’re interested in yourself, then people become interested in you. When my friends and I were young in Hollywood, we would strut in..we would ALL be hot..and well we’d pretty much ignore any advances made and just have cocktaily fun (not that kinda cocky-taily) in our own little circle. We had one friend who soo badly wanted love and therefore would always go on a hunt to chase it, in order to feel worthy. Then i distinctly remember looking to my left, as i was sat on a bench, at 10.45pm, by a tree in a West Hollywood fairy-lit bar, and my friend Colin, (who is dreamy…one of the universally fit ones…) who everyone wanted a piece of, was right next to me…chilling, with his leg propped up on the tree. He had a care in the world, nor an insecurity problem and didin’t even raise his eyes to the gaggle of girlies trying to get his attention. We were having a conversation about the boy that had ventured off to ‘find ass’ amongst the glitzy crowds. I remember him grabbing him, sitting him down and saying ‘you don’t need to go find it. That’s not at all hot. The people that like you can see you. Chill..stay in one spot..they will come to you.’ Never a truer word said! I remember being single forever…well i had boyfriends and a constant stream of arm candy, i was known for that. Hence why my Hollywood friends find it hilarious that i’m actually getting properly married and i now have a baby. Yet i always felt single and because i never could look at the ‘bit of candy’ on the end of my arm and think they were good enough to be my ‘forever.’ (Not because i’m big headed..and i am giantly big headed. But because i never wanted to just settle for something that wasn’t my ‘perfect.’ Keiran years and years after, is my ‘perfect.’  But it took that long to find it and i’m sooo glad i waited for him to arrive. From being with him i’ve learnt that everything happens for a reason. You’re path plays out the way it’s meant to. We’ve never been more in love. We’ve found our balance and enjoying everyone moment of our home life, our bubble and our love. It’s the kind of love that people hope to find. The kinda of love that people have written about in fairytales for centuries. The young are young…and well when i met the 18 year old and the girl that hoped to be his ‘forever.’ We’ve all been there. It never felt soo good to be old! 🙂  Thank fuck. I’d never want to go through all that boy/girl drama again. FYI/Keiran and I haven’t fought in ages!!!! I love it!)

Being at ‘Turner in the backgrounds’ was great. I get on well with his little ‘Adeline.’ (That’s his girlfriend..and not the name of his willy.) We certainly got through some vodka, after a drinking game and the need to abort it after thick people ruined the excitment. Then we rambled the evening away, laughing, loving and putting things on coasters. 🙂 (Adeline gets mad if you don’t put everything on a coaster.) I think i then had a mild bicker with the 18 year old who though he was a player-player, after he attempted his moves on me, by a patio door…whilst my hubby was in the other room and his ‘bedroom totty’ was approximately 10 steps away by a fridge.  I watched an arm wrestle and gave advice under the night stars.Not sure what happened then..but i began to feel really drunky. #notgood

Everyone had accidentally left me on my own. My tummy started to hurt. I was already ‘hanging out my arse’ and began to feel tired. I remember walking into the living room, looking to my right and seeing Adeline on the sofa. Then looking to my left and seeing the 18 year old pretend ‘player’..sat on the other sofa and his only 17  ‘bedroom totty’ sat on Keiran’s knee. Infact, now i think about it…they were half  like snuggling?? Hmm..? #againnotgood (I’d never do that!) But then again, it was accidental. He had spent the night being the perfect hubby, pulling me to one side and telling me how much he loved me. (‘Baby i love you. I’m so glad i have you in my life. You’re the best thing to ever happen to me.’) Aww… 🙂 I likey. I’m learning how to concentrate on the good that he does and not dwell on the little things that don’t matter. We both are and we’re doing really well! I mean i did ‘hang up’ on him after a mild tantrum. But as soon as i saw him walk through the door, i went through 5 minutes of being ‘off button’ then i leaped upon him with a giant cuddle. I love him and i just can’t help the way i feel. I love being in love with him. It makes me feel ALIVE.

Anyway, back to the story..i must’ve felt ill…coz at the time i didn’t care about the ‘lap sitting.’ I plonked my drunken self on the sofa feeling really sicky and after a deliberate *cough*by Adeline, Keiran swifted his way over to me…took me upstairs…i puked and then went to bed. Adeline later came and joined me for a ‘pass-out’ but gave up on the rest, after all we could here were feet thundering their way up and down the stairs.

Fun night. Loved it lots. Keiran walked in on Turner and Adeline trying to ‘get jiggy.’ Adeline was all grumpy at Keiran for ruining the moment. Lol. Erm..? Turner has walked in on Keiran and I bonking a MILLION times. Yet the difference is MY ‘handsome’ walked away from the ‘pumpy.’ Turner…walked IN towards and not only asked for £10, but then wanted a conversation about life! HAHAHAHA. (Which reminds me. I cleaned the windowsill 2 days ago. It had raunchy orange  handprints and sin smeared all over it.)

I’m currently MADLY in love. The book is going to be amazing. Baby Ruby is very Mummy clinging right now and life…oh life…couldn’t be better! I can’t wait for my hubby to get back from work! Really really happy. I’ve actually got quite a lot to do today. Oh and nothing is worse then waking up in a party dress and in the same face from the evening before…with your handsome still in his suit…and having to venture back home, hungover, tired and freezing in the wind and rain. Walk of shame..won’t be doing that anymore!

New leaf, new chapter, new life..[Bronze here]

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