At ‘LOADED’ (Blondie is Rachel, who’s back got nickarooed. Back? I mean ‘bag.’) Not sure what i’m doing? Yet i’m sure it has something to do with Ego, booze and me welcoming my (imaginary) subjects. I was just drunk on champagne and having a boogie with my boobies at the end of the ‘everyone begging the DJ not to stop’ night. I have a glow stick and a whistle around my neck, given to me in the VIP by show fans who had pierced nips and were in ‘want’ of baby boobie jobs….i think?
Anyway, i’m pissed off because i’m having to miss ‘Britains Got Talent’ tonight, because of a family (snooze fest) dinner at ‘Aaaragh.’ I HAVE to go because it’s my lovely cousins birthday and because she’s milked the fact that i will be showing up. At least i’ll beable to get trollied infront of my on Grandmother. It sounds bad dunnit, but it’s not. She loves it. She use to be ‘Miss. Burma’ (haha) and well she’s the biggest fan of my boob job…after Buddha ofcourse.
Please tell me what happens. I need all the details. Feel free to text me a moment to moment account. I’m rude. I totally use my phone whilst ‘fooding’ with company. It’s non-stop for me right now and my Facebook Chat is going insane. (I’m not ignoring you because i’m a bitch. I’m ignoring you because i’m currently naked, trying to spray tan and geting ready for dinner, whilst writing a blog and because i’m a bitch.) Calm down my delicious ‘jollies.’ (Ooh-la la.) I’m a trollop, not a multi-tasker. Oh i met loadsa gays today, who worshipped me appropriately in book stores and dancing competitions. I LOVE my GAYS! You KNOW it! I find a new gay best friend everyday.