Lotion my dry bits

‘Why do you have your hands down your pants?

I’m trying to moisturise my thighs without anybody seeing!’

‘Then why are you doing it in front of a public footpath??’

Yes, it’s morning and my day has already taken a swift skid into ‘The Land of all things Bizarro.’ There was someone in almost every room of the house, so i was forced to lotion my dry bits, in a secret public footpath location. I’m sure i must have looked a little ‘pass me the kipper, so i can smack it against my head,’ as i was having to lotion random dry parts, with my clothes on. It looked like i was rummaging around for treasure. But it’s fine. I live in one of those private residential areas. I have no privacy ever…it ROCKS!!

3 thoughts on “Lotion my dry bits”

  1. you funny fucker chrissie i bet all the geezers on your manor are always looking out for u coming out doing random shit. and throwing rocks at your window trying ot get u out aint they babe

  2. shut up aint they got no eyes round your way then aint they seen the thrups? u would get people tring to chirpse u in our mannor chrissie take care babe tada scratch


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