I’ve totally got the lergy. It’s got me and got me good.
Nothing is crapper than the lergy, simply because you sort of feel it coming don’t you? Yet you don’t really do anything about it, other than moan that you’re maybe starting to feel fluey. Then ‘SLAP-BANG-WALLOP’ is pops out of nowhere, in full force and *whams* you on the booty with a heavy palmed *GOTCHA.* 🙁
Now, although, in the past, i’ve been quite familiar with rocking a fuzzy head successfully, I truly cannot and in fact out right refuse to co-ordinate a snotty nose with my outfit. I’m devastated. I’m just mulling around with baby flu like symptoms and I’m certainly needing a cuddle. I need a BIG cuddle and an ‘aww bless’ more than anything right now. *Double sad face.*
As if, i’ve managed to let the lergy GET ME on a FRIDAY, when the weekend is about to dawn. Lergies are for Monday mornings or long Wednesday afternoons. Friday’s are about ‘Frrrrr’ feelings of joy and wines at lunch. Matt Dillon once told me that fresh ginger would help me get rid of the flu..whilst he was saucing me up with cocktails out of bamboo cups. So I bought some and well I’m now scoffing it with my fingers for breakfast because I have no clean forks. If it doesn’t work, i’m just gonna look like a twit, which i’m completely and utterly fine with. I think?
But yes, I hope to feel better soon. Don’t you just hate it when you feel a bit lousy and you need affection, yet there’s no affection around. 🙁 I need good food and lots of it. A big warm cuddle and maybe even some love. I need to feel love rushing through my lergy veins. It’s like when you’re mum kisses your poorly better. It doesn’t actually make it better, but it sure as hell puts a smile on your face and makes you feel all warm and yummy again.
The family’s all good. Junior is literally the happiest baby in all the land and i’m not joking. My little son wakes up EVERY SINGLE MONRING, with the biggest, most deliciously charming smile on his face and a fit of the giggles as soon as I come into his focus. AWWWWW!!! If I could wish for anything, it would be for everyone in the entire world to be as happy as my Baby Junior when they woke up. He’s a super, jolly blessing and even if I feel all run down and rubbish. he makes my 6am wake up call worth it. He giggles and laughs at everything. I love, love, love him sooooo much.
Every morning Ruby and I literally hover over him giggling at his giddiness. It’s such a fresh feeling to be able to see him kick, wiggle and ‘joy-joy.’ He’s alive, he’s happy and it’s how everyone should feel.
Anyway, Last night Keiran came over to see the children and to see me, I guess. I’d been working all day and it was actually really nice to know that he was coming over, because my little family is my comfort and since he’s been gone, we’ve been doing okay, yet there’s certainly been a piece of the jigsaw missing. I think all four of us are soul mates because the bond we all have as a whole and with each other individually is amazing. The connection is amazing. And my Dad always told me that soul mates HAD to be together in life, in order to function appropriately and to their best ability.
Yesterday when he came over it was nice because Ruby was filled with excitement and when he left, in the doorway, we had a cuddle…a big one…one that i needed and well something that was an action and not a word. We hugged and neck nustled (when you bury you face in someones neck, in a kitten like fashion) in the doorway. During that moment, everything for me felt safe again and I don’t even know if it made him feel happy. But I would assume so. Then straight after that moment of ‘togetherness’…and day was turning to night…life pulled us apart again as Ruby and I waved him off down the garden path and as he went back to rest at his new home. It must be really hard for him having to walk away from his wife and family and go to his new lodgings, because even when i’m down, our family home is filled with baby love and giggles. Even the noise of the Ruby tantrums and the playful banter is sort of a joy, when you don’t hear it anymore.
I was a bit worried because I wanted my birthday and Christmas to be filled with magic, love and family togetherness. It’s my favourite time of year and a time when i’d want everything to be more than picture perfect. Yet is it even going to be that way? I’d hate to have a Christmas that looked happy on the outside, but truly sad on the inside. Wouldn’t you?
Anyway, i’m off to tend to brief meetings and catch up with my correspondents. I had a guy tell me that he didn’t think I was able to do something today and I hated him for it. I felt like he whizzled all over part of my ambition, my dreams. Nothing is worse when that happens…well add the lergy and yeah, you have it pretty ‘worse.’ 😉