I’m F****** Fabulous

Had the most delicious day today! Right from the start, i was filled to the brim with the ‘happy happy-ooh yeah’ and let me tell you, i’ve been ON TOP of THE WORLD…infact I still am!!! I have wine. I have ‘Ooh laa.’ I’m loving my world of Kitty Cat  and well life has been nothing but GREAT today and to be honest, it seems it has for everyone. WOOHOO! (*Bra pings off*)

I’ve shopped all day, in an odd white faux fur, pink, and yellow, Bimbo barbie colours, a cheeky glint in my eye and armed with a spending problem. I went to Doncaster. (I go a lot…it was the town that birthed me and after my ‘years long’ stretch in good old Holly Hollywood, it seems i appreciate Doncaster a great deal more.) But yeah, i walked the jubblies around the town center with my Mother. Had lunch at the worst place i have ever eaten in my life. Just so you know, ‘Thai Chilli’ in Donny, is CRAP. When the best part of your meal is your BEER, than you know it’s pointless forcing food down your throat, to a background melody of ‘on repeat’ screachy oriental disco beats, and paying money you could’ve spazzed on bronzer, in that place of ‘not much great food’ joy. 🙂

To be honest, i am being a bitch, because when i walked in they were nothing but amazingly nice to me. We got the ‘power table’ and everything. (Thankyou Paris Hilton.) But, i can’t lie, the food was ‘oooh nooo,’ and i’ll eat ANYTHING. Infact, stand too close to me for too long, and i will eat YOU! (Please don’t send me *pants down* love mail, with the word ‘DINNER’ on it. I’m not in the mood…yet.) Great banoffee pie thing though. I ventured towards the dessert cart, with my hair, eyes and boobies. I was all alone. And yeah, i am TRAGIC. I’m work ‘it’ to the dessert cart, like a WHORE! Yet suddenly out of nowhere, i was surrounded by a whole crowd of men, who all apparently wanted banoffee pie, with a side of ‘floozey’ also. 🙂 LOVE MY LIFE! They were lovely. I made them carry my plate.

Anyway, after crap food, My Mother and I decide we need coffee, in order to shop. We take four steps forward, find ourselves in Curry’s, and furthermore find ourselves buying laptops, because they are PINK and because the salesman was hot. The salesmen are like vultures in there! They see me, or any other Wunna, and bee line inward, with their grubby mits a ‘rubbing.’ In 15 minutes, i’d spent a grand on two laptops i didn’t need..(UGH, coz it was FUCKING PINK…kill me) and another…for no real reason. Love it though! You only live once. I was in a great mood. We couldn’t be arsed to carry it all, so we left it there to pick up later. On the way to the shopping center, i bumped into one of my Wunnarettes ‘JOY,’ who had trained it on her own after pretending she was ill. (Aww…) I sort of looked up, saw her and Bimbo squealed. I love meeting twitter Wunna fans…especially Wunnarettes! I feel like we’re one big (misguided by Me) deliciously disgusting family. Yay! *shimmie here*

Finally got to the coffee shop…and recieved a baby sized mobbage. It’s great on days when i feel amazing, because i’ll sit, have a banter AND probably end up buying you things. (God, i’m FULL of LIFE today! Bubbly! Loving it! And i’m not even on drugs…yet!! Lol) I loved meeting everyone. I bought more bags of nonsense. Walked through stores pulling handful of jumpers that i felt i needed and throwing them into arms. Grabbed a bottle of wine, bought cat litter, found dignity, winked, waved and let my mum buy £10,000 worth of diamonds! (WTF!!! Her own money though.) My mums got the flu…it’s the only thing that makes her better. Also looked at new appartments today and got a free dildo through the mail from a company that believes i’d be a great girl to advertise their product. lol I also had a chav, grab cabbages, put them on his boobs and wiggle around, doing my voice, pretending they were MY boobs… at Me.

I eventually decided to venture back home after a quick stop off at Morrisons, bbmed Jonny and discussed a ‘move in.’ (I think it’d be good. Without me even knowing, i was looking at a place, unable to imagine him not being in it.) But anyway, I’m feeling happy, sexy, drunk and Va Voomy. I believe i have a great career a coming this year FINALLY and i’ve been flirting with ‘Eastenders Neil’ on Twitter, because he showed me what he looks like shirtless. I look GREAT shirtless, it’s only fair. I enjoy a casual moment of ‘flirt for fun’ breeze on Twitter. Keeps us alive and with a fanbase. (:) ) I also heard that one of my friends hung out with my big delicious Gay

4 thoughts on “I’m F****** Fabulous”

  1. Hi like reading this blog. Sounds like you are tuned into the universe or it is tuned into you. Sorry to hear about the bad food. But glad things are good and you having fun and as you put it everyone wants you at there parties. Heck enjoy life as you can and don’t think that once you get older you can’t enjoy it either. Have fun enjoy life but don’t get in a rut either change things suprise people don’t become predicatable. Cheers.

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