How many days til’ Christmas?

Wunna land couldn’t be more perfect right now. The Christmas cheer is winking and beckoning me to rejoice in it’s juicy swirl of madness, my marriage to quite frankly one of the best in this entire world, the fruit of my glittery Burmese loins is a pigtail frenzy, delight of a ‘can now flawlessly count to 10’ and is certainly learning her ways from Mummy Glamour Puss and Daddy Keiran. (Lord help her. She has ‘Daddy Keiran’ and ‘Daddy Pete.’ That’ll  be fun for me to explain to her when she’s a teen.) And well with another little bundle of baby joy on the way, an upcoming birthday (i’ve already had my pretend ‘Wazza thinks it’s funny’ bicker about my birthday and how old i am rant with The Great Waz himself, who still fails to absorb that i am only 2 months older than him, so if i turn 32….after a few Christmassy drinks, a ‘Happy New Year’ rum, followed by a ‘shake hands with Cupid’ arrow shoot…he turns the EXACT same age. Every year we have to have the same convo and well like i told him yesterday, he’ll be doing it until i’m 92.)

But yeah, my world is lovely. I’m really just enjoying crimbo now and putting work to one side, as a lot happens next year, like a couple of telly things, a lip gloss line, a book promo, the writing of a second book, an opening of a beauty salon and a baby…that i think i need the rest to celebrate this year, with my new found *bump* and with a *shimmie.* I’ve never been happier and as i said to Keiran a couple days ago, who claimed that it still felt bizarre him being in a relationship, as he found himself washing the dishes. He quickly added…’Good weird’…before i began a big old ‘girl’ rant at him. But we’ve both been through an entire full life circle as separate individuals. I had my Hollywood chapter. he had his army, working away chapter. We played, flirted no gooded and winked, all the way through that time, only to BOTH find ourselves back where we began AND then infront of each other falling in love, followed by being engaged, being a family, marrying each other, having so many crazy things happen to us entertainment wise, living a fairytale and now having a baby on the way. It’s our new circle of life and well even though we both enjoyed our previous circle, (I was marrying movie stars, as he was in a jungle defending our country) we’ve finally managed to look back, celotape that era shut, give it a good old dusty and frisbee it away with a ‘past’ flag. Nothing is better than our new chapter, a much more simplier life, which is ending up being not so simple and sprinkled with glitter. I always say that we are and have become so lucky…and well our relationship has always been filled with love, a deep love that no-one could ever understand but us…and Baby Ruby. We’ve had our downs…yes…. and we’ve had everyone make a comment, or interfere with what we call our ‘bubble,whenever they’ve wanted to. But more importantly we’ve had our ‘ups.’ *Wiggle-wink.* And now we’ve finally found our balance and you can only find that balance when you grow up, forget everything else and like i always say ‘just trust, just love and be happy.’ We laid on the sofa last night, him in his work clothes, I in my preggo pyjamas, giggling and baby talking and teasing each other with mindless childish foolery. I think i was pretending to *snip* him out of my life with a bit pair of pretend giant scissors, and roll him up into a ball, before sewing him back into my life with playful flirty regret. (Dont ask! I hear the looney bin a calling. He loved it and told me i could never succeed at *snipping* him out because he doesn’t *snip* so easily. Then he might of asked for a blowjob? No…wait…he didn’t. He stated that he thought i was on pills because i was actually happy, instead of being moody. 🙂 I’m obviously such a great wife, that i shock my own husband, when i act remotely satisfied with him.)  He shouldnt actually think that way though because one of the biggest things that i’ve always adored about Keiran is that he is the only guy ever, who i am actually impressed by and i’m impressed by him every day. Not only because he works hard and loves hard and can do pretty much anything with panache, be it romance, man stuff, or the world. Yet because i feel like i’ve weirdly watched him grow from this boy into a man…and well every woman is proud of that moment, in their gent. It’s all we ever really want out of them…and ofcourse adoration…and ofcourse gifts. 🙂 But really out of EVERY man i’ve ever met or dated and i’ve dated loads of men from all walks of life and caliber….i have never been as impressed by them, as i am of my own little hubby. Can wait to forest hot tub at the log cabin again, this Christmas for my birthday. Four whole days of calm, happy, family, Christmassy bliss. It’ll be lovely and super exciting for Rubes. Plus, i’m cooking Christmas dinner and topless hot tubbing in forest, with the man of my dreams. It couldn’t be better. I constantly *flashback* to the time when we met and the things we would do and say to one another and i adore where we’ve ended up. It’s perfect. Our one year relationship, that turned into a marriage, is equivalent to 5 years of a normal couples union. We’ve been through so much and managed to do so many things that people never get to do in their lifetimes. I still can’t believe it.  Yet i do know that there are couples who get to do a whle lot more, so we’re excited to achieve. I know we’re very lucky. (Shit, Starbucks has got soo busy since i began this blog. There’s buggies and babies everywhere. Oh! And a woman scowling at my outfit. I’m in Jeggings, a jumper and a farmer’s flat cap. Surely, i’m the bomb diggy. AND i’m by pancakes! I’m like a Fatboy’s delight!)

Okay, so you all know i had a great weekend. Ruby and I spent time at Victoria garden centre that is filled with Christmas activites galore. Fiber optic rooms, trees, lights, toys, Santa, food and pets! I mean Holy Terrfying much! Those pets had to run for their lives, when my daughter (who didn’t know she was on kiddie reins) charged up to them with utter excitement, to *squash* her little Burmese nose up to the glass, whilst screaming with a magnificent joy. I would’ve stopped her, but ah well, i’m a soft parent. She has to be doing something really bad, like stealing hamsters and putting them up grannies underwear, whilst they’re on fire, for me to scold her. I have loose morals, for a child that was raised so well. I think the humour of it all gets the better of me and then i can’t help myself. Nothing i do is ever with malicious intent (unless it’s with malicious intent 😉 ) and always in the name of fun or ‘funny.’ However, unfortunately, my sense of humour is not for everyone really, now is it. 🙂 *Blows you a kiss.* (I’m angry right now, because i thought i just accidentally deleted this entire entry, by stupidly pushing the wrong button. I didn’t and if i did, thanks to Wazza…it probably would’ve got saved. *Happy again.*)

We also got a car, this weekend. A car gifted to us, by my Mama, in the form of ‘surprise-Mercedes-yay’.’ I’ve just done my *boast* about that already, so i’m now going to leave it to settle with you and rejoice in the fact that my Mother is quite wonderful and we now have an extra set of wheels.

My hubby has been working non-fricking stop, to the point where he has hit exhausted. I do need to be more helpful and less doughie eyed…but having a *bump* ain’t that easy, especially with the thought that he actually really, no word of a lie, would like me to have 21 children. And i’m not joking and doing my normal bit of ‘exaggeratio-much-strut-strut.’ He really does want as many as my body will push out, and believes that my true job is to ‘give & carry.’ (His 20 million offspring. 🙂 ) I do believe that life is all about love and reproduction and i do adore having a family. Yet i watched the documentary last night, on a woman who had 15 children, all to the same man, so it wasn’t all broken and chavtastic…but it surely was a bundle. Keiran’s heart and eyes lit up with complete love and well from that moment on…he was determined to have his 21 kids. We’ve both always wanted an amazing family. But 21…i can’t do. I just looked at him and said, ‘I’d have to have one a year until i’m 50. I’d have to actually carry them and birth them, whereas all you have to do, is have sex with me and *spurt.*’ He smiled and said, ‘Well you could have twins and triplets in between, so it’d give you a year off.’ HAHAHAHA. For now, i think we need to concentrate on making sure the one we’re currently cooking is all dandy. I think Keiran enjoys me as a preggo. Not the mood swings, having to do more and me hitting himin the goolies. But the no drinking, no partying, all goodie-goodie part of me that has bloomed. I’m quite high horsed and moral, right now. All posh, good girl, looking after my baby, the home and my bump. He much prefers that and hates ‘The Wunna’ that is a slave to the Pinot Grigio. I actually prefer the new me to, as you can still be posh, classy and a goodie-goodie and still be fabulous all at the same time. I never realized that before. I feel more fabulous now than i have ever been before. I *sizzle.* I feel of absolute worth.

We have our first scan on Friday morning at 10.30am at Pontefract Hospital. I’m worried and excited all at the same time. As a mum you worry for the health of your baby and well i’m excited to watch ‘The hubs’ go through it all for the  first time. If you came to our wedding, you know he’s emotional. So Lord help him Friday morning.

I’m happy to read the messages from those of you who are finding dating fun and the ‘handsomes’ that are worthy of your heart this Christmas. I’m sad for the girls that are finding the ‘true stories’ behind their ‘not so truthful’ males. But ah well, that can all be taken care with via a curb kick and a *shimmie-what.* I was ill yesterday and weirdly had 27 phone calls from journalists asking me to cal them back? I didn’t and haven’t yet. But wondered what it was all about. Now i get why? My school friend Kweku, what the press like to call the ‘Rogue trader’…unfortunately got sentenced yesterday for the biggest bank fraud in British History. 7 years he got and well i feel as though the press are trying to depict him as some hideously, evil mastermind, greedy mastermind. But from what i know, or knew of him, he couldn’t be further from that description. I remember him a selfless, warm hearted, quiet, intelligent, do-gooder of gentleman, from a family of great integrity…so i hate that they’re all now painting some kind of undeserved ‘tragic’ picture of him. But it’s what they do to make money and they’ve all started to call me about him. I’ve ignored them, as i’m sure his family are going through enough right now. However, it’s not easy as ofcourse i’m one who hates people being painted in what i consider to be an untrue light…and so journalists tapping into Wunna land is not that fun.

Okay, i’m gonna go now, because i’ve got a bit of Xmas shopping to do before Rubes get back from nursery and Kerian gets back from London. I’m currently hearing about ‘I’m a Celebrity’ drama and apparently ‘working class’ Eric, doesn’t like rich ‘Upper Class’ Hugo, because he believes he’s spoilt and been born with a silver spoon in his mouth and doesn’t like the fact that Hugo went on a trip to Scotland with his friends and hired a chef to cook for him. Not one part of me, thinks that is bad. 🙂 Infact, i think that is GREAT! The last time i went to the log cabin, i tried to hire a chef to cook for us, yet he was off that week, so i couldn’t! I adore Hugo and so what if he’s been spoilt a bit and born into money. I don’t think that’s his fault. I actually love it and i think people these days more people aspire for such a life and quite frankly, i don’t believe that that is such a bad thing. It’s so much better than young boys or girls aspiring to be a chav and achieve an ‘ASBO,’ and thinking they’re cool because they’re in a street gang. You can have anything you want in life. Look around you and outside that window…it’s there and it’s for the taking. Go get it!

Anyway, I will leave you with love, a wiggle and a charitable cause:

If you do anything this Christmas, please sponsor a Burmese child with Action Aid, for only 50p. It’s a cause close to my heart, simply because i am Burmese and my entire family originates from the country, a beautiful country, which was forced into poverty under evil rule. Yet now it has a chance to be bold once more, as justice and democracy meanders back into the country and offers it’s helping hand.

Changing a child’s life is GREAT KARMA!

So call 0800 108 8080 or text ‘Sponsor’ to 70500, to help a little Burmese child this Christmas, for only 50p! I’ve done it, alongside lots of good hearted people and a whole bundle of celebs.


Now, i know a lot of people who believe ‘charity beings at home’ and therefore can’t be bothered to give to such a cause, as it’s a cause they may not relate to. Yet children and the love of them is something everyone should beable to relate and being a charitable person, isn’t something that is within any good person and not something they*whop* out, whenever they feel they want to. If you’re good to the people of the world and good to the people who are good to you, than life gives you a *wink* and blesses you with loveliness! (Meaning: Sponsor a Burmese child for 50p NOW! 🙂 )

Wishing you all a happy time and a fruitful end of November, as we roll into my Birthday month. I love having a December birthday. There’s just something about this time of year that creates a magical atmosphere. I also adore all people who have Decembers birthday and simply because on the 19th…it’s MINE!

My choice of attire this lovely end of November afternoon, whilst i’m 3 months pregnant! Jeggings, with heels! Do it! Here are some of my favourite ones from Select. At only £12, you can get them in every colour! (I already have!)


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