Hairy God Mother

Just got out the most delicious shower. The kind of shower where you ease away the troubles of the day, in a warm, steamy rainfall, that makes you feel nothing but blissfully safe. I prefer a bath, but i do shower. I love it red hot and well i can’t think of a better way to end my Thursday than towel patting down the fresh new me, after washing away the sunny sins of the day! My towel was pink. The cubicle was steamed. The floor was stoney tiled and i had a smile of satisfaction on me, like no other. I wonder how many other people around this worl dof mystery, were taking midnight showers? I’d invite you all into mine, yet i’m really not one for sharing. You hear all these sex stories that people have commited to whilst in the shower, bath or place to get clean. I don’t enjoy getting ‘dirty’ in water. I’m all fire. I find it clumsy boring and yeah, i’d prefer to just use the BED! I class my bathing time, as personal time. I grew up having people pretty much *picture* me in bath tubs and showers telling me to *wink-pout and look playful* for shoots. Now, i’m grown up, i finally get to bathe alone! Woohoo! *Pass me my Rubber Ducky!*

I need to get to bed early tonight, because i’ve got a lot of packing, and organizing to do as soon as i peel myself away from my morning sheets tomorrow. I’m travelling to London in the late evening, after an afternoon with my ‘Handsome,’ who always misses me deepy when i go! I have to work there until Monday morning. I’m doing the ‘Early Bird’ show. I have 5am call times, which means 4am wake up times, which does actually mean fun, yet i won’t beable to get my ‘party party’ on. In the time that i’m not sleeping, i’ll be writing. I’ve got a hell of a lot to do and if i’m deeply honest i am so *scream it from the roof tops* excited for all the book stuff that i have coming out! (Oh I just looked through my emails. I have an audition next weekend…. and I have to dance. 🙂 ) Wazza is currently being my favourite person ever! I tend to ramble on at him with all the things that i have to do in a mild, drunk, online panic. Then like a hero…he’ll *click* his fingers! ( I love how i’m making him sound like Arthur Fonzirelli…) and just like that…he’ll sort out my life in one sexy, pie eating second. He’s like my big, Pontefract, Hairy God Mother of Cyberland. I would seriously be unable to function without him!

Other than that and before i go to bed, I’ve had ‘Latin Lover’ Facebook yell at me, for no reason. I hate that! Have a reason for the yelling!!! I mean why bother! There is nothing worse than ONLINE facebook chat stroppiness. He’s such an undeserving attention whore, at times. Like a child who throws a tantrum, in order to make me notice him. Lots of boys do that, and i find it highly unattractive. I’ d much prefer someone to yell at me face to face, than over a slow Facebook chat!

Anyway, he made up lies and went with it. (Jolly good.) I’m the Queen of truth telling and well I did my little wiggle of wisdom at him! I think I opted for a rather eloquent and clever way of chat back and went with calling him a, ‘Dickhead.‘ It’s simple but to the point…rather like me! You can tell what kind of a character a person is, by how they punctuate their *talk.*

Long story short, it took him 3.2 minutes for ‘Latin Lover’ to admit that he was lying and then apologise. He claimed that he just wanted to stress me out for fun. That’s not fun and that’s not what people do in their spare time. People ruin their OWN lives for fun…not mine!!! Even my mum read it, looked at me and called him an ‘Idiot.’ Then she helped me make up lies in order to get me out of trouble. 🙂

Life is currently terrific, but i’m terribly knackered right now. Loverboy is texting me, this very second being the perfect darling that he is! Right now he’s a village away from me, yet like th rest of the world we’re blanketted by the night sky. I’m sitting in the middle of my living room, on the floor, in my baby blue pjyama bottoms, on a lush pink carpet, with the smell of roses around me and my boobies. I have a kitten by my side ( a kitten that won’t stop sleeping down my cleavge) and a laptop delivering my words of jiggery… to this merry world! Oooh i can’t wait to fall into my white bed sheets!! They are calling their Queen of Hoochie Coochie! I actually still have my eyelashes on! Wait…i can’t believe it’s 1.15am already!

I don’t have anything else to report really, other than there are naked Indian men on my tv screen rubbing each other in a sauna, (lovely lovely.) Ye sterday, i was called a ‘Playmate of Riot’  by @GaryPonty ( I liiike) and well Latin men should only be filed under ‘lovers!’ I say it all the time! There’s a reason why they are given that title and it’s simply because they are not great at relationships. They make better holiday flings!! The sooner they learn that the better. Infact the sooner they learn to also stop tampering in Wunnaland with their constant ‘love me- love me,‘ the better! I’ve loved you…now move! 🙂 (He hasn’t been very good to me in the past. I recall him slapping me in an Italian restuarant, after i slapped him or being big headed. Then i remember him wrestling me to the floor, in a busy Mexican fooery. There’s actually a whole lot more in that box of Pandora, that none of you guys know of yet!) I Do get myself into the most awkward predicatments! LMAO. Thank GOD i managed to glue myself together. Thank God…it ALL worked out for the better! if i can do it, anyone can!

Bed for me. Night!!

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