Green Lights, Lust & Booze

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God! How cringy was my blog last night! I woke up at the crack of dawn, with the birds chirping and Junior’s foot in my face, giggling because Guinness had made me be a plonker.

Just to get the record straight. I’m dandy. I now do not have Guinness running through my system and with the Ben thing…he did loads of things wrong. That he could’ve done right, or thought about before he did them. Done! Said! Sorted! Phewf! (Boys and booze are rubbish. They make you feel sorry for yourself or even worse THEM. Lol. I’ve been instructed to drink a can of Guinness every night for my iron deficiency..so BE WARNED. On the plus, at least it’s not tequila, as that causes the Tequila dance and you find yourself passed out on a West Hollywood merry go around, whilst 4 gay men carry you into a car and drive you home, so the drummer from Maroon Five can walk you up the patio, as the gays have forgotten about you, because you have a hot male, lawyer, room mate…Who has also been out partying.)

Okay cool…that’s over.

Anyway, today’s a new day and i’m excited. I’m at work all day, i’ve had a morning text from Keiran to organize Baby Junior. I went to brush my teeth this morning and found a giant naked toy baby in the sink..weeing. (Thanks Ruby! The beauty of having kids. You can’t even take a relaxing bath without a clapping audience or sitting on a flipping plastic pirate ship, mid chill.) And well…like I said, the Doctor messages me all night telling me all these wonderful things about myself. (He doesn’t tell me much about himself, but tells me how beautiful I am. Could be a match made in Heaven. Lol.)

No, but honestly, he asked for a picture last night, not a mucky one, not once has he been mucky…so I sent him a nice, smiley, normal one..and what I got from that was a message stating how ‘different, caring, special, sweet and bright’ I was. Followed by a message saying that he couldn’t wait to see me…(I like that, as I can’t wait to see him) and this…’Can’t wait to make you mine. You won’t be single long. 😉 ‘

I’m telling you…i either take really great selfies or my charm is beyond me. I should bottle it up and sell it for millions. So i’m back on the path to excitement…he’s making such a grand effort, that he’s proving to be such a great date! I mean it’s not even 8am and we’ve both already done our ‘Morning, you’re beautiful’ texts, wished each other an amazing day and he sent me over a million kisses. *SWOON*

I’m working with Lydia today and yesterday I taught her about ‘green lighting’ a boy, as she states that she is flirty by nature but if she likes a boy she’s not so much. ERM??? LOL. Wrong way around! I’m old. I’m confident. If i like a guy, he knows it. So I basically explained to her how timid boys are and how hard it is for them to actually be confident and make the first move and if you want them to, you have to make sure they know the ground is safe to walk on…and give them a sexy, but subtle, flirty ‘GREEN LIGHT!’ Make sure they know that they could potentially upgrade out of Friend zone and be yours! If it was I, I’d just tell him how hot he was and how attracted I was to him…but in my own little glamour puss way. However, Lydia, being scared because she actually fancies someone is going to stick to the phrase, ‘hey Handsome’ with a few ‘winky faces’ Lol. Which then turned into just a random statement…followed by a ‘winky’ face. HAHAHAHA. Oh Lord, have mercy!

Happy April Fools Day! (I don’t bother with Tom Foolery, as my life is already full of it regardless. I might be different and just be dead normal with zero silliness, to prove to myself that my life can be somewhat sensible!)

 

1 thought on “Green Lights, Lust & Booze”

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