Glammy not Clammy


Morning bitches! Dolls! Kittens! Glamour Pusses! Kids! Mums! Boys! Ladies! (ooh…oooh de ladies!) I’m overly chipper today because quite frankly it’s MONDAY and i’m NOT AT FLIPPING WORK! Hurrah! Drinks all around, with a wiggle and a coffetti shower. Now, i’m not afraid of a good old days graft, yet i’ve successfully managed to complete a solid 0 hour work week, after being ill and with two babies…still in one piece, still smiling, whilst talking to the dude in America, who’s sorting out my business plan and whilst emailing in regards to my eyelash line. I’m naming my styles, fun things. Well after my favourite boys in LA. They were the reason behind my ever popular wink, so why not whop their names to a style and celebrate all things ‘Chrissie Wunna.’ (I have no idea why i’ve placed my name in commas, as it is my actual real name. These days i’m not detached from it. I’m me. The grown up version of me. When i did that Hilton show, which I loved by the way, i became two of me. There was ‘just Chrissie’ and the Chrissie that couldn’t walk around shopping centre’s due to happy teens and Mums wanting to take their picture with me. I didnt’ really hide behind the mask of ‘Chrissie Wunna’ as I am naturally, showy, naturally glitzy, naturally look at me and chatty. It was more my way of managing and coping with this sudden change in ‘everyone seems to know who i am for five minutes’ without going mental. I’m mental enough, so really…anything…but wine….helps. 🙂 (I’m working so much that i don’t even have time to drink wine now. How shit is that! But whatever, i’m doing what i do best and that is love hard, smile with a wink and make money. I’m doing really well now.

So, as you’be gathered and mainly because i’ve just told you and because  i’m actually writing a blog…i have the day off! Nothing is better, when you work ALL THE TIME, to have a MONDAY off work. I am over the moon. I couldn’t even sleep last night because I was that excited. My days off are now for errand running and catching up on the work that i like doing, ie/beauty line..auditioning etc. I want to make my mark and right now, i think that i’m gonna. Plus, i have the entire next weekend off to knuckle down and get going. (I’m currently having a flash back of a conversation I was having to an old friend in Morrisons, who was adjusting Mr.Kipling cakes on the isles to pretend like they were working hard.)

Another thing…why is everyone winning the lottery?? As you know…had message convo’s with Matt Myles who won the Euromillions. I think that’s simply because anyone that lucky must have some great karma. Very jealous. But very happy for him. Went into work the other day and a lady that i see every day…she’s 30…told me that she had won it too…well won £1 million,just before Christmas…ON A SCRATCH CARD! I’m surrounded by lottery winners and even though i’m one to work hard for my fine earned, Prada bag buying pences…when you win a bunch of money…it’s just better innit. It’s sexier. I actually feel bad for that girl who won the million on her scratch card because chubby taxi drivers keep asking her out and trying to woo her, with the best kind of wooing, a chip butty taxi driver could give. She sort of liked him but because she had split up from her hubby, she just wasn’t ready to date. I asked her if he was ‘fit.’ She said no, but he was a nice guy. UGH! HAHA.

I’ve decided that i’m quite superficial, when it comes to love. I like arm candy, eye candy, a good looking, great bodied guy. Maybe that’s why i’ve always dated younger? But i’m a swine for it. I’m shallow when it comes to chosen life partners. I did explain to her that my shallowness does get the better of me and i’ll always learn the hard way. Yet, just nice guy, doesn’t cut it for me. Neither does, ‘just hot.’ But i seem to be able to forgive a hottie faster than most…and i think it’s because i’m a fore sign. I’m quite masculine when it comes to love and sex and i don’t know whether it’s because I learnt it from my Hollywood guy friends, as I was always surrounded by boys, or whether, i’m just naturally like that because i’m a Sagittarius. Really. I don’t know?

I told her that i was the cougar, who will eventually settle down with the annoying toy boy, who uses me for everything that I obviously i will be a giant success by then. She smiled, didn’t judge and showed me a text from the taxi driver, who i think called her’ beautiful.’ Very sweet. that’s nice. I just enjoy eye candy. I can’t have sex with someone unless i think they’re a dreamy hot. I’d rather take a vow of celibacy then have to put out with an average. 🙂 HAHAHA. I am awful.

On the kids front, my babies are amazing. They’re both so smart now and i don’t mean that in a ‘aww they’re clever’ kinda way, like they’re actually super clever. I don’t know how? But i’m chuffed! Juniors trying to chitter chatter, Ruby is ever the actress. Yet more than anything they are closer than ever. When they’re apart they MISS each other so much, to the point where once reunited, Junior flings his arms around Ruby’s neck with squeaky glee, closes his eyes and just hugs her, as she hugs him back. If she cries, he power crawl up to her, rubs her back and gently pulls her hair out of her face, before scowling at whatever has made her weep. It’s things like that make you proud to be a mum. They’re great kids and they’ve weirdly been raised super well and by ME!!! Insane innit! HHAHA. Ruby’s mind is on fast forward, I don’t know how she knows so much….but she does. Junior is clever in the sense that you can give him anything and he’ll know what to do with it, from observation. Give him a tv remote, he’ll try and change the channel. Give him a hair brush, he’ll then start brush his hair, give him a pen, he’ll write, give him a phone and he’ll pale it up to his ear and say ‘Hiya.’ Give him a banana and he’ll do a monkey face and eat it. Both babies are super quick learners. They must get it off me. 😉 Strut..strut..pout.

So, this morning, i managed to submit my audition, slightly hard as i had Junior plonking hand prints on my freshly fake tanned legs and Ruby crying her eyes out because she wanted ‘Frozen’ on before nursery and to not be in a yellow dress? I was sat at the dining table, typing away, with the circus that is Wunna land going on around me, trying to sell myself to important folk, but i did it with far too giant eyelashes on and too much lipgloss.

Got done thought didn’t it. Missed a bit out, but that happens. Once you’ve sent it, you always think of something that you wanted to say, that you didn’t. Then i drove the babies to nursery, drove my mum to work, dropped my brother off in Barnsley, grabbed a sarnie and shot back to blog, and sort out my business plan.

Life is good right now and i’m feeling really lucky. I have everything in the world, all going my way.

I’m happy.

I love you.

Stay Glammy, not clammy in the sunshine dolls.

Chrissie x



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