Beautiful day, shame i’m still sick really. I’m in that stage of the ‘worse’ before it gets ‘better.’ I have snot pouring out of every oraphis, i’ve wiped it on my arm and well in the Wunna household, the only way to get better, is to pamper oneself with the mere luxuries that life has to offer. Roll in the able bodied masseuse.
I figured the only way i’ m gonna get felt up, during this time of snottiness, is if i actually pay a man to come on into my house, strip me naked and rub every part of my butterery body over with essential oils. I am delighted by the pure genius of this idea, passed on through the ages of Wunna family. It’s the art of FORCING someone to feel you up via the fine art of PAYMENT! Yet, i don’t want to get too excited about the whole scenario, incase all he does is actually massage me. (haha) I mean he better come with the police or something, because the way i’m feeling right now, you wanna try and keep moving when you’re around me. Y’know keep one foot in front of the other. The moment you stop to breath, i’ll mistake your pause for advances, and it’ll be a ‘pants down-pounce’ bonanza. I’ll be scrambling on top of you like you were Mount….? (I can’t really think of any mountains i like, right now??)
Anyway, i’ve got to go shopping, which i can’t be arsed to do. Yet it’s normally something i do in order to waste time, i guess? I’m pissed off because as of right now, i have people trying to hurry me out of the door, mid blog. I hate to be on a time line and rushed for no real importance. They act like the World is about to fall apart at the seams. FUCKING makes me want to slap them with a wide palmed, butchers hand and feed them to horny midgets. I can’t do this right now…they’re ruining my life!! It’s soooo rude! I’m goin gout in disguise today. Not that i need too. I just feel like it…because i’m sick. Tragic. Odd how i went for neon. (She winks.) ‘LOOK AT ME!!!’