Not to moan or anything, but why is everyone i’m currently meeting A TWIN???? I don’t get it?? I’ve never met so many twins in my life ever. This is no joke. Everyone i am bumping into is like, ‘hey, i’m Jill, Jack, Joe or Jane…..oh and i’m a twin!!!’
In LA no-one i have ever met in 5 years, has been a twin except from this one girl that use to work at Crunch Gym with me, and this other hot model boy, who i talked to whilst drunk in Palm Springs. He was hot, a bit of a tit, lots of fun, yet the most lost little sparrow, in all of the land. Hollywood was chewing him up, yet i was on a hammock, tipsy, and a wee bit lonely because some other boy wasn’t agreeing to love me….so we made out ( i worked on his vunerability) and we never talked again. He had a twin! That would’ve been fun!! That was such a great time. I remember running around with a bunch of Adidas models, girls and guys and causing destructive chaos. It was night, and soooooo hot out!!! I had this tiny white frilly skirt on. I kept tripping up over myself and it would slowly inch upward, until i was finally running around lawns like an over-excited idiot, with my bum out, and not a single clue!! That’s the beauty of Chrissie Wunna..i guess?
Wait, i’m getting distracted!! Yeah, that twin was a lost hottie. The tragic thing is that he ended up being good friends ( i know, how random and just my fucking luck) with the male i went on to date. So it made the ‘never talk to again’ thing difficult. Very small world, and not very teacups and Disney.
Anyway, in the last 3 months, i’ve met approx. 14 sets of twins. It’s insane!! There’s got to be something in the water over here in the Motherland, as this is borderline ridiculous!! I mean, i always thought i wanted twins, yet now it’s sooo…’everyone is one.’ There’s been a girl who has a twin in Prague, a twin who tried to trick me into smacking a pony. A twin that forgot he was a twin, one that had a twin randomly show up at a party, one that was on Byker Grove, another that had a Drag Queen twin. One who’s twin sister was named after a sea nymph, and one that told me, his twin would fancy me if i was taller. I think i’m just surprised because i thought twins did everything together, and we’re arm in arm 24/7. (hahaha) I thought they wore the same clothes, and on occasion struggled to find their own identity or something???
I can’t imagine having a twin??? I’d have to do away with her, in her sleep. I’d always be trying to nip her and pull her hair. Then i’d complain because she was trying to steal my face. I’d end up destroying her (being the good person that i am and everything.) Luckily, i am not blessed with a twin. I am a sister, yes….but i was born FIRST, which as everyone knows is essential when it comes to the order of children in families!!! (hahaha) I had a boy say to me, ‘It’s odd that you’re the eldest, as you act like a bratty only child.’