Divine Dollop of Dolliness!

Feeling AMAZING today. All it took to reach this legendary status of ‘AMAZING’ was an early night, wise words from my Mother, a little bit of sparkle and a cupcake made up of chocolately delights. (Know that i’m not really a chocolate person. I will always choose brightly coloured, candy scented sweeties, over a milky block of brown.)

I was sick of worrying. Tired of wallowing in self pity. Woohoo! So now i’m back! yeah bitches..and don’t THINK i’m not doing ‘back’ in pink and feathers! (Reminds me of a time, I was at The Abbey in West Hollywood. I had a guiant bag made up of fushia feathers. It was a monster..and I loved every sheding piece of it. A big gay, called ‘Randy’ who i loved and guzzled bottles of champagne with, whilst piggy backing upon him and letting a group of cuddley gays sing ‘Greatness’ songs at me..once found a bundle of handbags…purses are what we call them in America. I guess all us girls had plonked them down by the bar, whilst we sunbathed, over Malibu. (The booze, not the city.)  He pondered over the purses trying to fit one with a figure. As he tossed them over his 6ft 3 shoulder. He came across my pink feathered piece of madness, as i was strutting by with hotties, telling them i loved them and letting them fight over me. ( I did actually used to do that!)  Then with the most careful manner, slowly lifted it up, almost as if it was fit for a Queen..(as in Liz..not drag) and without a single moment of hesitation, shone it towards me, in the LA Tuesday afternoon sunlight, with a ‘This is no doubt yours, my doll!!’ I like that people can spot my pokery a mile off, without hesitation. Be it boys, bull, bags or boobies. Nothing of mine, gets tossed over a shoulder and if it did…a minute later, they’d be running back to glue the pieces back together!

Right, today, i’m going shopping. Doncaster is the destination. It’s the townt hat birthed me, so every weekend, i venture back for a little shopperoo. I’m armed with my fine eatned pences, my pussycat manner and my mother and darlings, i am in the MOOD for a purchasing!

I feel delicious, sexy, frisky and like i can conquer the world. The ‘bleeding’ thing is no longer a worry. I’m not letting it chew at me..Why would I? I hate chewers! Plus, ive noticed that it takes a great deal more than a bit of ‘sexy blood to stop this pair of eyes from functioning.  I’m packing up my troubles and bra flinging them to the moon. I love this about me….i can bounce back within moments…and it always ends with me drinking. This time i can’t drink, so i’m excited at the mysterious outcome of what this new charge of sudden happiness will bring! Yipppeee! I want champagne!

I feel like the cheap charisma that flies out of a party popper..all ‘boom’ and ‘magic,’ and over within a second. I need a bit of fun, a bit of a pick me up. I haven’t been able to have fun in a loong while and so i’m going to find myslef, a little ‘ooh laa daddio.’ I can’t live without fun in my life. My *bump* will have to learn that.  This is the year i that took to rest. It was my time out…and i wanted to feel normal again. What i’ve learnt from this year of time out, is that i’m not normal at all…and i love that about me. I love that i’m a Glamour Puss. I love that i’m a minx. I love that i’m playful, weird and silly. I love that i don’t take life seriously and i love that i adventure through EVERYTHING! You can’t fight who you are, and when you are something so delicious…why would you? (I was totally reminded of the time when gay Adam and I, stood infront of my appartment window after a day of filming and completely flashed the traffic. We did it like we were naughty school kids. Haha…like twats! He crotched grabbed and well i did, just for the full ‘magic’ to happen. I loved that moment. We felt free..then pissed ourselves for the whole entire night at what dickheads we were! That’s life to me!)

Anyway,  this Ultimate Glamour puss, who all the boys love and all the girls work hard to wiggle to, needs to get ready for a big day of shopping. I want to look divine this afternoon…sort of like i a work of art. Something that you can only look at, but dare not touch! I want to melt hearts and smile at lovelies. Then indulge in luxuries and *pout pout strut,* to the next four walls of beauty. (Why is it that when you smell a party popper once it’s popped, it totally smells like gun powder? It’s my favourite smell in the world…left over burning, after a little bit of silliness.)

Okay, so i’m going! I’m just reading the letter my new literary agents sent me..it reads, ‘Thankyou for meeting with us today…..and taking the steps into the unknown with your every first book publishing!’ OMG…can you believe it. It’s a dream come true! It’s all i’ve ever wanted! They’re a celebrity agency and I just feel relieved that i finally have people mentoring me to success..and the RIGHT mentors! I have a brand, a book, a something that can truely make an impact. So yeah… Face of the future? Why not? People do it everyday. I think i can give it a shot. I mean, everyone loves a fun loving glamour puss and if they don’t….they will. 🙂


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