Morning my Glamour Pusses of ‘Ooh laa.’ I feeling amazing today. Full of ‘Va Voom‘ and adventure. I woke up to Jedward (woohoo…love them) on my telly…it was a sexy little threesome it was, and then a phone was thrust into my face. That’s how my morning began…(I have tea..i’m fine,) and i’m used to the thrusting of a pink phone.
I’ve been having a little thinky and well i’m just so happy right now with everything that’s going on in life. And although i am occasionally hardest on myself ( but hardly too often…haha, I mean myself and I are really good friends with each other) i’m pretty content in knowing that i (The Queen of Greatness) have stood under a hand made banana tree dressed as a yellow bird and pretended to fly whilst children sang. I’ve can- canned in an exotic land ontop of a dandy bunch of muscle bound heros. I’ve seduced a whole pitcher of margarita and climbed ontop of a moving vehicle all in the dying name of ‘Lust.’I’ve loved hard. I’ve fought hard. I’ve lived hard…and danced much! I’ve ridden an elephant through an Asian park, been thrown out of a ‘Zen’ garden, and pushed into oncoming traffic.I’ve passed-out on a merry-go-round after a tequila dance and a broken heart and was found by a delicious group of gays from LA who lifted me and drove me home to safety (I actually remember mid-‘passout’ one of them saying, ‘ooh doesn’t she have an amazing pedicure!!’) Infact (sorry to ramble) when they got me home, after trying to put a ‘key bump’ up my nose to wake me up…whilst i was passed out…they saw my fit half naked roomate..who thought it was rather random that a bundle of gays had invaded our living room. (They were all running around and bumping into each other clumsily.) Anyway, they sighted him and dropped me, in 2.3 seconds on a sofa (that i rolled off of) to lay there and DIE…and then sexually abused poor ‘roomey’ i believe for 5 hours ‘sort of’ straight.
I’ve piggy backed on drag queens, on glitter filled nights…I’ve burlesqued for Paris Hilton, wiggled to the merry tunes of ‘good times.’ I’ve romanced like no dear other, drank like a shit faced sailor…smeared a reputation around this little town named Hollywood and loved every minute of this thing we’re calling ‘life.’ I’ve done the complete right things and the exact wrong things…but this way i’ve learnt.
Russell Brand thought me that in order to find out who you really are…you have to cut deep, right through to the bare bone of your ‘being’….and well it ‘bloody hurts.’ I’m actually proud that i’ve done that…i’ve really lived. However, I DO NOT want you guys to have to go through it…learn from my mistakes…Be naughty, be good, be sexy, be virginal…be whoever you are, you want, you believe and celebrate it. (Madly.)
Being Chrissie Wunna represents a ‘celebration of self’ and winky ‘good time‘…a cheeky, happy ‘ooh laa,’ the ability to bounce back…find the ‘funny‘ in everything, dare to be honest, (yet dolloped off with a smile and wicked side of ‘wit.) Be independant, free and do not court scandal. Most importantly love your merry life, whatever you’ve been given. Once you start loving it… (and i’m living proof) it loves you right back….Forgive and understand why people make certain choices and do all off this with a wee bit of ‘glamour’ and a fucking great push up bra. Find the ‘FUN’ in everything. It’s there…just look harder.
Have a great Monday! (Loving being home!!) x