Bunnies out of Hats Bitches

Oh God! I was supposed to invest so much time in work today and instead i sat around in my pyjamas all day and pushed it to one merry side. THIS IS NOT GOOD! I keep getting distracted by meaningless things. It’s like i’m about to do so well in life and God (being the occasional bitch that She is) decides to toy with me and dangle bait right infront of my little hungry eyes, to lull me away from what i’m meant to be concentrating on. The bait always comes in the form of a ‘Penis’ or a ‘Good time.’ It needs to stop. I can’t afford to lose this shot, so i need to stay focussed so i don’t waste my time, my life, my energy, my big moment! I’m useless!! God!! I’m not lazy, i’m just always on some magical adventure, that takes me away from work. I’ve always had this feeling that if you just do something you love, money will come later. Yet i’m at the point where i’m quite complacent and i’m not even doing what it is i love anymore.Which is foolish, as it will be snatched away from me if i don’t buckle down. I’m waving at the crowds for no fucking reason. Little ‘shortcuts’ are being drooped infront of me all delicious and ‘ooh laa’…but if you take shortcuts, you’ll always get cut short. I have the ability to do amazing things. I need to concentrate on that and not on random ‘will not even know them in a year’ penis,’or ‘already done it a million times’ fun.(No-one will ever beable to take that crown from me.)

On a much lighter note i’m trying to make pasta. How hard is making pasta!!!! Fucking ‘ell. All i know is that it’s ready to eat when you can pick up a piece, throw it at a wall and it sticks. My friend Dylan who i use to have sex with in LA taught me that little trick, after picking me up from an airport when i was leaving some ‘Loser’ in New York. He did go on to say that ‘pasta making’ was ‘womens work.’ I think that’s why he was teaching me?? Anyway we drank a whole bottle of Crown Royale, gave each other massages and spent about 20 minutes throwing strings of pasta at his kitchen wall. After a round of slutty picture taking. His recovering alcoholic friend who’s a magacian came over and showed us a few too many card tricks. It was hilarious because he was rubbish and we insisted on telling him!! Everytime he performed a ‘magical moment’ we would beat it into him that he was worthless (haha) which would make him swig our Crown Royale with each line of abuse!! Awesome! He was shit though. I mean if you’re gonna dedicate your time to something…at least be a little bit good at it right? Until you’re pulling bunnies out of hats that are leaping ontop my lap and performing hip hop rountines and hoola dancing to jungle beats, then i’m not going to be impressed. He just kept drunken slurring ‘Is this your caaaarrd?’ And i kept saying, ‘NO, you FUCKER!!!’ It really wasn’t even my card. I wasn’t even toying with him! Then he’d swig the ‘Crown,’ whilst shaking his head in disappointment. I feel like him right now.  (Well not really, I don’t think i could ever feel quite as amazing as him!!) I need to start working a great deal harder!! It’s because i’m being forced to use the ‘intellectual’ side of me. A muscle that’s not so used to being worked so visciously. (Hahah!)

After pasta i’m writing a giant list of all the things i need to do and then proceeding to do them! Come on Wunna. Snap out of it!! (‘Latin Lover’ is soooo hot right now! Swooon.)

1 thought on “Bunnies out of Hats Bitches”

  1. u are to funny chrissie u do make me bubble babe pasta is a pieve of piss to cook get the mince meat stick it in the frying pan cut up some sausages and a bit of bacon chop up some onion and garlic and throw the sauce in boil the pasta job done pasta ala scratch

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