Last night, i was in an all in one, skimpy, dark leopard print, low cut leotard, that was sprinkled with gold and heels. I’m was in Leeds getting ready to get my stripper-doo-dee dance on (an adventure that is now wearing thin, and simply because the hours kill ME. I’m a social night owl of ‘ooh,’ but i’m a Glamour Puss, being at the party is waaay different to working the party. Plus, i’m not finding it as fun…as i was initially. The money making part is the fun part..and when that becomes the fun part in anything…you’re in trouble.) I’m exhausted from getting home at at 5am. I don’t think i’m cut out for such an adventure at my age. However, i’m not letting go just yet, i’m just going to rest when i need to rest and work, when i want to work. Then slowly have a bit of a rethinky dinky. INNIT!
I had to start off the night on a bit of an ‘hmm’ because before work, i had a delicious drink, with Loverboy, who had picked me up, drove me to Leeds in the rain and then made a rather great executive decision to stop off at a place called ‘Henry’s’ for cocktails (i had a chocolate orange martini, he had a white russian..) and food! (We both went for pasta! I love my carbs and needed it if i wanted to get through the evening alive.) ‘Henry’s’ is greatness, because all drinks are 50% off during the week. Hell to the yeah much!!! Two cocktails for £6 and two beers for £2. Tremendous! The food was good too…even though they forgot to make our food. I was a little bit ‘hmm’ because i would of rather spent more time with Pete, then have to have gone into work. I’m not use to it. I don’t live my life like that! I do whatever i want, whenever i want..and with deliciousness and fun. I hate having to do anything i don’t want to do. It makes me tantrum…and fart. 🙂
Anyway, I was early for work, because i had time to kill. It’s funny how when you want to kill time, time refuses the ‘kill.’ I had coffee to sober up a bit. Then i called @GaryPonty…who amused me greatly, whilst i sat in Cafe nero, watching ‘thought they were being clever’ drug dealers, be quite obvious dealers of drugs. We had a bit of a banter, a bit of a laugh, (about midget porn,) then before you know it, the time DID fly. It was 7.15pm and i was having to *strut* to work, and get ready for all the jiggery pokery.
Dead night. Quiet night. Boring at first…i’m not gonna lie. I like to be busy and adventurous and surrounded by *bustle*…it gets me going and makes me feel safe. A socialite needs her people and her people need to be having a good time around her, to a tremendous degree. I was in a leopard print leotard (oh lord) and bored…so the manager pretty much MADE me do an interview with a lady who wanted to do a little bit of the old research. I got asked, why i chose to do this? What made me? How i felt about it? What i liked and disliked? It was weird, i didn’t really feel too comfortable…but maybe because i hadn’t had my wine yet? I mean, i’m a good interviewee always, because i’m honest, bizarre, controversial and tragically open about pretty much everything. I’m just better after wine…but aren’t we all!
Nice lady…she watched me on the ‘Hilton’ show…scared me a little, then my time was done…and i was immediately handed a wine, by Louise the beautiful bartnder. I think she could see the ‘uncomfortable’ in my face. I strutted up to the bar, believing that it was an awful way to begin any night, where i would have to be confident and naked, every four seconds to the music of sex gods. I felt a bit interogated really…which is odd for me? I don’t think she found my jokes even mildy funny.
Anyway like i said quiet night, bored until about 2.30am. Yet thankfully due to 2 brilliant blondes named Morgan and Paige…my night was saved. They’re really good people and i love good people. Good, fair, caring, people. Who aren’t just out for themselves or user much. It’s refreshing…i enjoy it! *Does a bailey shot*
Long story short a bunch of bankers staggered in and in record time, three of us were dancing up a little *tease* for them…infront of a mirror, and finding it hilarious. You know you’re shit when two of the three girls (yes i was one of them) are laughing out loud, all the way through it, you are getting peeked at through curtains, and you trip over an actual naked human being, who was expressing herself via the fine art of erotic dancing AND al of this with your comedy boobs out! I tripped over an actual naked dancer. How did i not see her!! Hahah! Greatness! I fell into a wall.
Infact, a lot of the time, we team up into pairs or triplets, and well i’m don’t really love that! It’s far too cluttered for my liking. There’s pro’s and cons to it though. The good thing is you get to do less work, because the focus is shared…kinda like in an orgy…but without the sex. (Pointless.) But the bad thing is, when you’re not doing anything, and both men are being occupied, via the fine art of ‘teasey dance’ you feel like a bit of a twat…just dancing around, and feeling yaself up… like a ‘Billy no mates,’ for no real reason. I mean, i was bored,so i got on the floor and let my top *ping* off…(this is the part in the orgy, where you leave for a bit and make a cuppa tea, by the tumble dryer.) Paige stopped mid-dance and said, ‘OMG!! YOU HAVE ACE BOOBs!! I’ve never seen your boobs out before, i had no idea..OMG’ and all of this whilst she was grinding on a banker in a baby blue sweater and a wedding ring. *Naughty Naughty! Wink, wink, sending you to hell.*
My other dancers we’re VIP..and again humourous. I drank soo much…to the point where all dancing and stripping was comedy. One of the bankers stayed until 4am. He’d spent £500 and tiny minutes worth of dancing with boobies out. We cashed out at the end of the night. I called Loverboy, all pissy, moody and delightful. Then Morgan (who i love..the most genuine girl you’ll meet and a beauty) drove me to the train station.
I had missed my last train. The first one was not for an hour. I was all on my own at 4am, with a ginormous baby pink, and polka dot bag. I didn’t know what to do…so i went to the loo and glued my pulled my eyelashes off. That took up a whole 3 seconds of time. For some reason i was angry…which isn’t like me. I’m never angry for no reason. But i was! I couldn’t be bothered to wait an hour on my own, with a bunch of workmen, so i hopped in a cab and it drove me all the way…‘didn’t at all know his way’ home. I wanted to fall asleep but i couldn’t incase he took an extra lovely detour, and i’d end up under a patio, after an inappropriate against my will ‘feel up.’
I’ve never less like a Glamour Puss that i did at that moment. It’s exhausting me and yeah the adventure is now not really as exciting as thought it would be. It’s not ‘ooh laa.‘ It’s taking everything that i LOVE about being a girl, a Glamour puss, infact ME and turning it into chore. Making it boring and tiring. I tried to ask Loverboy about what he felt about it this ‘pokery,’ but he’s always so ‘nicey nicey people pleaser’ that i never get a direct, bold, opinion….EVER! He wants me to be happy, so he often doesn’t like to speak up about things that i might need to hear. I’m a girl that’s full of direct, bold opinions. I’m not a fence percher. I WILL take a sexy, dangerous, step and a very noisey, giant high heeled one at that! *WINKAWOO*Pete likes to make everyone happy. I wish that he would sometimes not be afraid to be bold. There’s a lot more to this boy that i want to know. I love him very much and well he can’t be okay with EVERYTHING? I need to ask him the correct questions.
Other than that, i found out that i can catch, i love my kittens, i fancy a chill drink tonight, i’ve talked to Jonny about the past, i’ve been in my pyjamas all day and i’ve taken the night off! The pervs have been out in full force on Facebook today..which like i said, i’m greatful for the love, and the flattery and the attention. I mean, it’s lovely to be fancied…but holy shit have they taken it too far today. There’s being fancied, adored and worshipped, and then there’s being completely disrespected! I’m HUGE on respect. I don’t know how some of them think they’re gonna get away with it. I’m not stupid, i’m very familair with the art of ‘dickhead guy behaviour’…today i’ve been lethal, i’ve deleted away like a champion. I must be getting my period. But i’m glad i did, because i have 649 friend requests awaiting a space..therefore the more pervs i can delete the better! Hurrah!!!
*Wiggle-Wiggle-Wink* Love you! Today i thought a boy told me to ‘LICK’ his face. He actually was asking me whether i ‘LIKED’ his face! It happens!! Oops!