Doing my life sober is REALLY starting to get on my *nunnies.* It’s just odd, i’m confused, i’ve lost my marbles and not even stumbling off my hot pink heels into statinary objects? Don’t get me wrong…(because you always do BURMA)…i can’t wait to be a MUm and i’m very happy the Good Lord has blessed me with child…but it’s sooo weird, strutting past a cocktail bar in the middle of the day and not being able to fling open the door of it and get myself a wine! I really want that! That was my whole entire life! Now, i’m all preggo sober and i don’t care what anyones says, for ME…like on Lemonade ain’t that fun! (I’m doing everything backwards, i did the whole ‘making my dreams come true, marrying a movie star, modelling and moving to Hollywood’ thing FIRST! Now, i’m back in Pontefract, with a new lover and completely and utterly tee-total? Eww…i make myself sick! GIN! GIN! GIN! NOW!!!)
Anyway yeah, today, was the day i aided the journey of my Loverboy from his parents home and to his new appartment, (which is lovely might I add,) whilst doing a lunch detour mid-travels. We had a carvery and because i love them. They remind me of Christmas time for some reason and well now that i’m a fatty *Mmmkay*…carbs are my new best friend. (Step aside Hilton. Starch ain’t gonna eliminate me, for wanting a book out and a shoe line. 🙂 ) We went to ‘The Highwayman’…a good clean ‘family’ place, which is nothing like me and simply because there’s no feathers, men and nudity. But i actually had me a lovely time, even though i felt stared at with each mouthful of ‘carvery’ i munched. The men in there act like they have never seen a floozy in a pink dress before. ‘Yes, i have tits. It’s not a that big a deal.’
Pete actually cried ALL the way. He’ dj ust picked up his last bits of stuffs from his parents and home and got rather teary eyed. he’s a sentsitve boy and well just felt like he was gonna miss them. It was cute to see him feel comfortable enough to cry infront of me. He didn’t commit to hysteria…he did those eyes that *fill up* with weeps and trickle down your cheeks. (Like i always say..the real kind of crying.) I bought him lunch and a lager to cheer him up. (Call me cheap, but dolls…you try carrying a human inside you. Lol. I love how that’s now my EXCUSE for EVERYTHING!) Not sure what happened? But i found myself sat in his passenger seat after turkey and telling him i’d look cute if i was just in nipple tassles right now, doing this…[insert a Carry On face, eyes & a slow shimmie.] Pete rarely gets a word in edge ways, as soon as he pauses mid-sentence to breathe, i blurt out some Glamour puss, Bimbo nonsense in order to get the conversation back onto ME! 🙂 (But i would’ve looked great in diamante nipple tassles at that point.)
I’m currently craving salmon flavoured rice, with lemon juice. My cravings have gone quite bouji now and after wathcing ‘Ru Pauls Drag Race’ last night. Whenever i’m around, or watchign Drag Queens, i up my game and ‘DIVA.’ *Hair-toss.* Even my cravings are all diamonds and caviar.
Ru Paul now has the BEST show on the telly, in my mind. I love trannies pole dancing and then trying to sell innceont Hollywood tourist cherry pie, after having to Lip syn for their life. HAHA.GENIUS! When i was on a the telly, Paris made us clean out PIGS for a challenge. Ru Paul makes them re-design what Barbie is wearing to make her look more ‘DARG!’ WHAT!?! Is this show just not my LIFE! I want it! I love it! Mine! Mine! MINE!
I could seriously so chain myself to a ‘Ru Paul Drag Race’ marathon. (I must say that i do have to be a bit careful though. I got a little carried away with my ‘smokey eyes’ today! Haha. I *dragged* myself up good and proper. I had eye shadow up to my eyebrows. Lol But fuck it. If anyone can ‘work it’…it’s this Kitty cat!) The main reason why i find Drag Queens so interesting is the fact that they are so bitchy honest about how they feel..they have this persona that they fiercely OWN and commit to! I enjoy watching them do THEIR version of ‘femme.’ How they think a woman should act! I’m the QUEEN of Glamour Pussing and the main thing i saw them do wrong with the Men was be mean to them. ALL Kittens know how to work their ‘femme’ to their advantage. I’m never mean to men. It’s not worth my while. I’m all winks, smiles and giggles. You can manipulate them with a look. One bitch tried to sell cherry pie to a guy by saying ‘ Where’s your wallet, gimme your money! You want this shit’ LOL. There’s no ‘ooh laa’ in that. There’s no story, no *magic.*
Other than that, i’ve just got home from waking up on someone bed. I’m so preggo now that if i see a bed, i find myself falling alseep on it. The smallest things, like walking…now exhaust me. It’s hilarious. It was actually Loverboy’s spare bed that i found myself upon and luckily he woke up on it naked too! (*Hubba hubba* God he is FIT!) We had had sex and blowjobs and well…it seems these days, we BOTH need a nap after a bit of * hanky panky.* I just like how he was in nothing but a white towel, we kissed, he got a boner and then he led me into his bedroom, as horses were on the telly. Saucy!
I am actually starving, so i do need to get some foodies. I’m reading up on how Kelly Osbourne lost all her weight, whilst i’m being told i’m an ‘idol.’ Firstly we all know it was cocaine and secondly…i do love being worshipped. (I love how i hate on thin people now that i have a belly.) 🙂