A Little Bit of Blogging Goes a long long way

Morning my Dumplings of Didgeridoo. My Happy little Hummers of Horn Fest. My Kittens of tender ‘sexual’ much and my tiny lumps of love. I’m meant to be attempting to breed. Today i welcomed my ‘crimson tide,’ so well done me for failing miserably. Woohoo! *Grabs Trophy.* I think the rain has put a spanner in the works..and a dollop of stress and horrifically Motherly lectures from The Great Wunna before me, has turned me from ‘chipper’ to maybe wanting to kick things. (I don’t like lectures. I hate being told what to do. Last nights lecture was on ‘the dangers of drinking’ and how it will make me old, because ‘look what happened to Brad Pitt.‘ Infact, no i don’t mind lectures because i enjoy honesty and straight talk. I just don’t like it to be decorated, or in some kind of code, or have Brad Pitt involved.) I love my Mother, I do. Yet she doesn’t half try and control everything tiny thing i do. I’ll never beable to breed under these conditions. God i really need a cuppa tea and a bunch of fertility pills.

Moving on…Last night Loverboy was so sweet. He always calls me after work and to tell me how much he loves me. Which is always rather handy, because i’ve usually spent the day missing him and wanting him to be there when i look to my left. We’ve come a long way fast and one of the reasons why (and i’m telling you this because i get messages about how we make it work on a daily) is because instead of complicating ‘Love,’ we’ve just accepted it openly. No game was played. From day one, i told him exactly how i felt about him, without fear. I’m not scared to be open, nor do i fear rejection. (Fear ruins everything!)

Luckily, he responded with love and a mild moment of  ‘feeling me up.‘ 🙂 We kissed..and after our first date, he told me that he loved me. I loved him right back…madly. But we’ve always fancied each other, even since school…except at that time he was like 12. (Lovely, lovely! Infact, i’m kinda dating my Childhood sweetheart.) I’m actually about 5 years older than him and I find him incredibly beautiful. He’s pretty much the perfect man and what I find sexy about him is the fact that he’s not afraid to BE HAPPY. People destory their own happiness. We’re two people that welcome ‘happy.’

We’re actually hanging out later today..and i can’t wait to get my grubby little hands all over him. I see him and my whole entire ‘being’  immediately melts. I smooch him to death, to the point wear his lips end up smeared in pink lip gloss. I know how to mark my territory. *Wink-Pout.* (The old lipstick on the collar trick.) But ThenAGAIN….he wins, as i find myself with my legs at ‘Quarter to nine,’ telling him my ‘Ooh mama’ is all his and how much i love his ‘Hey hey sailor.’ I love this man and have a fairytale. You could have one to. You just need grab a gin and start one. Baby step your way to your own happy ending. (Even if it does end, in a quick change of underwear and a side of chlamydia, and an asian woman, demanding $50.)

There’s a lot of praising of Loverboy today, because last night he discovered THE BLOG, due to the fine art of a work colleague, Googling his slanted eyed floozey, with boobies..and reading out a post to him…word for word, about our sexy little moments of ‘dirt.’ I had deliciously referred to his willy as a ‘whoop-dee’ and described how he toyed with his ‘matey’ whilst i committed to being a ‘Kinkerella.’ Oopsie! HAHA. I was on the phone to him late last night, after talking to Gay Gary Ponty and well Pete (Loverboy) wasn’t mad at all. He actually LOVED it and thought it was funny. FINALLY, a boy with a sense of humour. (IN YOUR FACE JONATHAN!!!)

Anyway, i’ve got to tan and groom and all sorts. Therefore i will leave you with this:

You are reading this blog with the actual people of the world…but like really. It’s read on every continent of this merry planet…via the fine art of ‘word of mouth.’ (That still cracks me up, to this day. I have no idea how it happened?) The five current…(as in today) countries that my blog is most popular in.. are: (And i do mean, where it’s read the most)

1. U

The two countries, waaay down the list where it is least popular today are Jamaica and Oman.


OH WAIT!!! Before i go, news just in via Facebook Chat by Wazza. (Who is pretty much the only boy i let run my life.)

He’s just messaged me this:

 ‘Here are some phrases people have searched for, to find your blog:

.Ann summers meadowhall peep holes

.Chrissie wunna pokemon

.Tranny booty gum (I especially like this one)

.Chrissie wunna wazza

.hagging a cream egg (Ooh actually that could be a fave.)

Welcome to my life…I’m growing up, and blogging my journey as I go along. Thankyou for being arsed to read it. I love you x

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