Xmas, Bump Rubbing & Disco lap dances

Awesome day, filled with laughter, work and flowers! I was up early. Pretty much worked all day. Met a new boy named ‘Ryan’…(when i say ‘met’ i don’t mean as in ‘date’…for once. I mean as in new male ‘being’ who has been planted into Wunnaland.) Infact, i’m well impressed with how well i’ve been doing with my Petey…aka ‘Loverboy.’ I’m actually going to manage ‘happily ever after’ with him! How ace am I!?! The puss in high heeled boots, has managed to settle down and find a fella who not only doesn’t mind, doing a lifetime with me. Yet also actually flipping wants to, out of nothing but love and the fact that i have boobies. Yay! (Fyi, ‘Ryan’ is my favourite guys name. It reminds me of a Ryan i was once highly fond of in Hollywood…who broke pretty little ‘i can’t believe he took money off me’ heart! 🙂 Wow, i loved that boy…and WOW did he play me for a twat! I can even remember handing over a fresh $700 cash, in an envelope, over a bar counter at The Abbey…and all because he needed it and i loved him. Hurrah! Babycham for everyone! He actually had a girlfriend the whole entire time! Niiice! I’m much wiser these days! lol Not really! I have a rash.)

Anyway, not only have i had a boy named ‘Gazz’ sing to my *bump,* and tell another boy ‘Matt’ off for banging it like a bongo, before playing selected mobile phone tunes at it, via the fine art of holding the phone up to my belly…which is better than him shouting down my belly button, with his mouth pressed against my belly. (He’s bought his girlfriend microwavable gloves for Christmas and ‘Gazz’ is about to no longer work alongside me. 🙁 It’s sad really because i’m actually gonna miss him. He’s pretty ace. Infact any boy that gets horny when he eats prawns, gives disco lap dances and wants to play ‘gynaecologists’ deserves trophies! You know you’re ACE if you’re gonna be missed.

The good thing is that i recieved flowers today! I LOVE getting flowers. Therefore when they were politely handed over to me by a chica named ‘Rebecca’…it made me feel all warm and fuzzy on the inside. Warm and fuzzy on the outside…is porn. I was actually sitting next to a girl named ‘Lisa’ who turned another year older today. I had bought her roses..a big bunch of yellow ones. This is the difference between us.. Lisa recieves HER bouquet, gets choked up and thinks she’s going to cry. I recieve My bouquet…(it was a deep red, silver and glittery..love, love, love it) i immediately began to pretend i was Miss.World for an audience of two. I think i royal waved, held my fleurs like my life depended on it, did my fake beauty pagent smiled and with my imaginary tiara, stated that i enjoy warm bubble baths, long walks in the park…and WORLD PEACE! I really loved my flowers!! It makes you feel girlie and appreciated. Ace when preggo!

Other than sitting in what i call ‘Preggo corner.’ A corner when i’m work, that i have labelled such a thing because you may only be part of ‘Preggo corner’ if you are PREGNANT or willing to IMPREGNATE! I told new ‘Ryan’ that today. Lots of fun things happen in ‘Preggo corner,’ like eating, cyberland, verbal abuse and *bump* rubbing…after repeating the term ‘Preggo corner’ for most of the 8hr day.  Infact Gazz, rubbed my *bump* with is bum today…which he called ‘affectionate.’ I call it…virginal.

I’ve had a fun day and worked my charming people skills on everyone, in my faux fur. A girl named ‘Claire’ told me that she was going to buy a pair of slutty secretary glasses, so she can look whorey (i love it) at the front desk! There you go…see the effect i have on people! Anyway, not sure how, but personal tranier ‘Adam’ who just seemed to be hovering around aimlessly, doing my voice, claimed that he had once watched a porn where everyone got naked and placed on pairs of Deirdre Barlow glasses, before getting sexual. It was apparently erotic. He actually told me off for calling Deirdre Barlow…Deirdre BARLOW and simply because ‘Ken cheats on her.’ HAHAHA. Welcome to my world. I really am loving it. Xmas is greatness!

This morning i took a taxi to work. It arrived early..which i loved….and because he waited. We bantered through the morning frosty streets, as he told me about his pregnant wife and current baby. Then he broke a couple of laws, laughed as he blamed them on me and told me that if we got caught i was too pretend that i was going into labour in order to save him for getting arrested! Hilarious! I’m always in the WRONG cab. Lol.

Luckily we were fine and well i always find the funny in everything. I liked him and simply because when i asked him if he was stressed over Christmas, he replied with a ‘If you are stressed at a time like Christmas, then you really must have something wrong with you!’ I AGREE! It’s a calm time for merriment. Almost like ‘life’ itself. People always forget that and get caught up in the stress of it all. The clamer and happier you are. The more joyous you’re life will be. INNIT! I loved the way his eyes lit up when he told me how excited he was for his 2 year old little girl on Christmas day. He brought Crimbo back to life for me. It made me think of my future with Pete and our little bambino! I can’t wait to have her now! I can’t wait to no longer waddle and i can’t wait to be her MUMMY!!! My life has utterly changed hasn’t it??? Amazing!

I do not at all remember what i was going to tell you now. I’ve managed to make my OWN hamper. FUCK you everyone who wouldn’t supply me with one. I tried to make it on a budget, but it cost me £50. Lol. I have a ridiculously early start tomorrow. I have to wake up at 4.3o to get ready for work, and get there before 6am. OUCH! I then work a full 8hrs, yet luckily i get done at 2pm. It’ll be my last day of work before i can officially celebrate Christmas and it’s wonderful that i’ll now get doen at 2pm, instead of 6pm..followed by 4 consecutive days OFF WORK! WOOHOO!

I really do need to have a cuppa tea and get to bed early, with my kitten. I feel like i haven’t seen Loverboy in ages. He’s jealous that i got flowers today. 🙂 I milked it like a true Glamour puss. I only have a few more prezzies to buy and then i’m all done with the gift buying. Christmas is a magical time of year. Remember to keep it that way and Remember to make sure that the people who have been good to you in 2010, are rewarded for their kindness with a little appreciation!

I love you dolls! What an amazing day!

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