Where the Heart is…

Home sweet home! I finished work at exactly 10am. (Actually loved work this morning. I did the best i’ve ever apparently done! I kept it fun, sexy,exotic and hilarious, and well i do have to pretty much thank everyone who called in for a chatteroo. It’s hard being on a tv screen and not being able to see anyone i’m talking to. I’m having to identify personalites via voice tone. The lucky thing is that you all get to see me….and totally in my undies. *Wit-woo-wink*

Afterward, i stayed a bit longer in the dressing room with two of the girls i’ve met there…Crystal and Emma. (Emma was again curling her hair in the mirror, and Emma was stting on the dressing table with suitcase packed.) It felt good to ease off my red padded boudior of a bed and grab a coffee, by the mirrored walls. We talked about boys, decided we whether we were racist and discussed how the mjaoirty of boys are twats! (My ‘Boy of Lover’ isn’t a *wally*though, he’s delicious.) The fact that during our conversation,  in the dressing room, I stated that we were like the ‘slaggy version of Loose Women’ must mean we’re defintely tragic…but yeah totally hot.

Currently a lot of you kittens have been going on about how my life is taking a whirlwind spin of glory….(and it is.) However, let me tell you, that you do not even know the half of it. I am seriously the LUCKIEST girl in the world. I sort of totter around, all winks, smiles, with my martini, boobs and *Va Voomage* and FALL into the most mind blowing situations of marvel, that any Puss of Glamour could ever wish to be in. I can’t really tell you what’s going on right now, due to love, loyalty and excitment. But i will refer to it, as my ‘thing-a ling.’ It’s kinda something that i’m keeping out of cyberland and only sharing with those that I love and who meet me in person. All i’m gonna say is, if you thought you were pretty good at *shocking* baby sized crowds, much. Well Dollies…have i got a story to tell! (But one to tell later…when the time has riped over to ‘right.’) I’ve out done myself this time. I mean this will SEAL the DEAL of Greatness, when it comes to Wunna land jiggery pokery and pretty much forever! Watch this space. (I’m currently reading a text that says ‘..with a horny gran by your side getting tag teamed by an amputee and a horny midget.’ These are the friends I keep. 🙂 *You bedda know yo’self!- Strut-strut-hip bump-pout* )

Anyway, yeah…(enough of that!) As soon as i’d finished work, ( i waited to recieve my schedule…i have a lot on right now, and i’m loving it.) Then i quickly raced through Camden, in the sun, with my three bags, coat, greeted Wunna fans in the form of teenage hip hop girls, and jumped on a tubed to KIngs Cross station. I leapt onto the first train i could, which was the 11.30am on Platform 1 and then with the biggest smile on my face and the loveliest *sigh* of relief, i sat in my luxury train chair of comfort and breathed. (I’ve been up since 4am. I’m like a machine! Why am i remembering that my friends vagina smells like roast chicken Monster Munch??)

I was sat on one of those tables seats opposite a laptop business guy, who was mildy perverted…(however having to listen to men wank for most of the morning, made me immune to the ‘p’ in his ‘perv.) Next to him…(I don’t let people sit next to me 🙂 ) was a drunk granny, with a book, who was pretending to be sober. Now i’m quite skilled in the art of drunkardness. You can’t hide it from me on the best of days! I swear on my life, she nearly toppled off her own bottom half at one point…but i adored her all the same! (God, i’ve been out pretty much EVERY SINGLE day of this month!! This will come to bite me in the arse…you will find out why, a few months from now Kittens.)

I arrived in Doncaster at around 2pm i think? I had a bacon sandwich, it made me feel queezey, so instead of waiting for my mum (who i had earlier broke fantastic but shocking news to) and got a taxi back home for £20. i enjoy breaking fantasticly shocking news to people, thinking, or well hoping that they would be jumping for joy. However instead of a happy and whimsical *leap* of ‘hurrah’…i recieved an awkward silence, a stern telling off, and an ‘oh dear…’ followed by the ‘You’re always so impulsive Christina, you never think’ speech. A favourite of mine. I’m so used to it, i could recite it to you in African with bongos, and whilst doing Vogue arms!

Now if i’m honestly, I am currrently laughing this off with a bit of wit and wonder. However, i am actually mildy hurt. I mean what i had to deliver was what i was file as ‘pretty major,’ therefore to feel that the woman who is closest to me, was giving me the ‘you must enjoy tangling your life up’ yadda-yadda…kinda made me sad. I read the text, said nothing, stared at the clock, and continued eating my bacon and egg sandwich in deep thought, in a grey Doncaster cafe. It did have the sun shinning through though and well…i don’tcare I’M FRICKING HAPPY!!!! Woohoo! (Wazza however, was as always a sweet pillar of support! He’s sad today because his only famous Twitter follower has decided to die. ‘Yeah not you Chrissie.’)

I’m back home in Badsworth right now, happy, relaxed, ejoying my world and getting ready to get a jolly big bollocking at approximately 8pm. Yippppeeee! Isn’t it awful when you knwo you’re gonna get bollocked and yet you kinda of just have to wait for it…happily and patiently. Yeah i’m in BIG TROUBLE. if you’ve ever thought that i was naughty before, all pulled a shocker, well like i keep saying, you do not even KNOW what i’ve done this time. What I will say is that it’s typically Chrissie Wunna and well my life really is deliciously hilarious. It’s forever changing. I’m even having to keep a secret diary about it all.

Okay, right now, i thought i could rest…and i do need it, as waking up to work at 4am, is hardly ever a treat! I can’t believe i was in Camden this morning, with a driver swaning me off to the studio at 4.50am, where i wiggled and winked on a bed of red, in my undies for chatty folk.  Now i’m in Badsworth, in pyjama bottoms and a cuppa tea, shaking my head at all the work i have to do.

I’ve got two books to write. One is almost done and ready to get sent to editing. My cosmetics line. (Loves loves.) I have a song to learn by Saturday and for some reason i’m finding it hard? It’s for Sony and well they sent me a song about good times and pocket sized pooches. I have to talk to my Lit agent about all sorts of excting ‘ooh laa.’ Then after all that, and a shoot inbewteen, and a chat to LA about my the show….I have to fit in my love life and finally absorb my ‘thing-a-ling.’ It hasn’t soaked through to *sunk in* yet! (I have something in my zebra clutch, that would shock the life out of you!!!)

Right now, if i’m honest, and i was telling @garyponty this the other day. (I was on the phone to him, in my London appartement, whilst on the loo.) I just feel like everything i ever wanted, i have right now. I keep saying it, but dreams do come true. I have my dream career, (writing, modelling, telly work, perfoming, music, branding, blog.) I have my dream boy, (the most wonderfully pure and romantic ‘being’ you will ever hope to cross your path.) I have fun, (drinks, laughter, hot pink dresses, heels and boobies) and top of the fullest heart and a world of pure marvel. I have unbeatable happiness. Infact, not just that…I now have my little ‘thing-a-ling.’ Everything!!! No really EVERYTHING!!! I feel so utterly blessed and i don’t know how i got so lucky??? But i’m never gonna take it for granted and i’m grateful for every single one of you that boosted me on my merrydrunken way!

You know how you can look at people and see that they’re only *pretend* happy. All fake smiles,’ ooh laa,’ but dead in the eyes. A friend of mine does that. He’s probably the loneliest person I know, yet pretends like he’s so fun and happy.  Well i’m not that. I’m glowing on the inside to the point whre i can’t even CONTAIN my *beam.* I’m trying to share it and celebrate it with you. If you could just see the goodness in the world and hold it close to you, whilst ridding yourself of the bad…you will prosper. I mean many people have regrets…i sure as hell do…and well we all see moments when we’ve let an angel or a good soul slip through ours hands. (Mine was Michael. Oh and also Eric.) Quite frankly, we should feel regret over things like this because there’s only very few truely good people in this world, that you will encounter…so when they cross your path, be smart enough to not take them for granted..because when their gone…it kinda hurts! But saying that, how else do we learn. I mean that’s why i’ll never let Pete go, or take him for granted. I’ve been given another shot…and because karma claims, i deserve one. Woohoo!!!

I’ve been inundated with messages asking for advice, mixed in with the odd, ‘You’re beautiful, can I look at your vagina’ comment. Now, I’m the Kitty Queen of *bounce back* ability and if I could pass on any bit of advice it would be to learn it. (OMG…i totally forgot, i have that Burma interview. Shit! I’m causing quite a controversial bit of chaos over there right now. 🙂 )

Anyhow, everythings changing and fast! I’m truely living and loving it. Bring on the fireworks, with a petal shower and dancing boys! Add a *shimme* and bitches, you have *magic.*

Ps/ I have the best baby pink nails in town!!!

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