The ‘bedroom’ in my slanted eyes

Rubber Bands were invented today!!! Really they were, by a dude named ‘Steve Perry,’ or something??? So, if you’re at work, or in the middle of a ‘really boring, but having to pretend you’re listenning’ type conversation. You can bring that little bit of random knowledge up, and state that it’s a 100%, valid enough reason, for everybody to be at the pub right now getting blotto…. to celebrate!!! WE LOVE RUBBER BANDS!!!

As you can tell, i’m a whole lot better now. Infact GLORIOUS!! Let’s get cocktails!! And i think that, when i write my blog, too early in the morning ( as in, when i’ve just risen from my sheets,) i’m usuallly quite grumpy, (not a morning person) therefore it makes me seem as though i need serious anger management sessions.  But i don’t i promise, (well only when i’m angry..ha.)

Just so you know, i’m a happy go lucky Glamour Puss and for those that too, wake up quite grumpily, in the morning…all you need to remember is that someone,  somewhere has it a lot ‘SHITTER’ than you, and Thank GOD for that ‘someone, somewhere,’ as they sure as hell made Me feel good about myself again, today!!!

So i’m back, armed with serious ‘Va Voomage’, and nothing is going to get in my way, of cheeky chappy happiness, without getting a sharp stiletto heel pierced into it’s soul. ‘OOH Laaa.!’ I kind of wish i was at a hotel right now, grabbing a night cap, even though it’s the daytime. Don’t know why??? But in LA, Hotels are great places to get your McCrunk on. I think it’s just the revolving cast of delicious males you can flirt with. I like new people, new faces, new room keys (haha) It excites me!! It gives me the wiggles, and the ‘OOH laa,’ in my eyes!!

I love eyes!! Obviously because it means, the boy in question can usually SEE, and My eyes, although a little slanted (hee! hee!), are my pretty little champions!! A couple years ago a friend and I tested them out, on some poor boy, that had been chosen to be my rebound, for the evening, to help me get over some other handsome, underwear model!! I hadn’t said a single word to him ALL evening, yet we had been watching him (yay to stalking,) and plotting our ‘POUNCE!’ I don’t usually like to ‘Plot’ as i’m too rebellious, to go along with any sort of  ‘Plotting.’ I’m more of a ‘heat of the moment,’ type girl, and i am NOT shy. But long story short, he was playing pool, i went to the toilet (which was obviously via his eyeline…otherwise the ‘plot’-thing would have been pointless..hahaha.) I come out of the toilet, in little red dress, ignore him, (even though, i know he’s staring at me. ) I wait until i get quite a ways past him. Then I stop, look back, (he’s looking right at me,) and i give him the dirtiest, hottest, ‘come to bed’ eyes, anyone has EVER seen. Then after 5 seconds i glide off….( and piss myself laughing to my friend, with a beer, who claims, my eyes were SHITE!)

Not that ‘SHITE!!!’ Boy comes ‘accidently on purpose,’ sauntering around to my table, sits himself down, randomly, and starts making conversation with me, beginning with the famous, ‘Don’t i know you from somewhere,’ line. (Champion!!!) Anyway, he then spoils it, by dedicating every kareoke love song, in the world ever to me. Whilst i shout, ‘I don’t F**king like you!!’ (hahaha) Then forces me to ‘slow dance’ with him, (Jesus Christ!!) And later produces a Sex tape….. 200 points to him, end of story, moving on…..hahaha

Yeah, i hate eyes!

10 thoughts on “The ‘bedroom’ in my slanted eyes”

  1. whoa whoawhoawhoa WHOA! You’re at it again – slipping in these juicey little titbits at the end of the blog like you think we won’t notice…. “produces a sex tape”? As in “from his pocket”????


  2. Yes, but what are the production values? Is this high-quality erotica, or something dark and grainy where all the action has to be inferred because no one can see anything? 🙂

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