Retail Therapy & Writing Books on Dating..

Image may contain: 1 person, smiling

A bit of ‘Retail Therapy.‘ A bit of ‘buying me some love.‘ A bit of filling my soul with the beautiful art of ‘purchase.’ A bit of swanning around a department store, Dior counter, in order to feel lost in a powdery haze of well lit glamour, is on the cards for me today.

It’s a treat ya’self. Don’t cheat ya’self kinda weekend.

(A boy once slid me a note that read exactly that, when we were on a modelling gig in Palm Springs, back in the day. he had a really bog ‘fro.’ I can’t at all remember his name. He was actually a decent human and the note was a joke. Plus, he had exceptional ‘comedy timing’ as he noted me, when I was IN THE SHOWER and naked.)

To say yesterday could’ve ended up somewhat ‘rubbishy,’ (and the result was ‘rubbishy,’)  I actually had a really great time. I took it all on the chin and pretty much managed to get some work done, catch up with friends, by inflatable unicorns and wooden panels and spend the rest of my day waiting…. in a cocktail bar.

Life could’ve been worse.

Anyway, to ease my pain, i’m filling my purchasey pockets with wondrously girly…shite today. I need lots of little treats that will save my soul from a mental breakdown.

I couldn’t at all sleep last night, because my minds under this crazy pressure. I know that I said that I like working under pressure, but I obviously lied.  I’ve now got 2 months to write, a completely different book and like I was saying to ‘Newly Married‘ Vicki…. (I love you by the way, thank you so much for believing in me always.) Anyway, she dashed me with bright ideas, encouraged me with all of her strength and then bloody left me to swim to some pool bar, during her honeymoon…

I KEEP running away from writing the book because i’m intimidate by it.

I don’t know where to start? But I should know where to start…I’m a writer?

Vicki: ‘Start from the middle and go from there..’

Any excuse that I can find to distract myself from book writing I will. And maybe it’s because I don’t believe I can do it? But i’m not like that by nature. So technically, I don’t know what’s up with me? Maybe all the Peroni’s have literally meandered through my soul and made me feel real life? Lol. Maybe I feel ‘one my own’ with this project? Maybe, I am scared that it won’t do well…? But I’m not scared of anything? (Except, sausage dogs.)

The first book to get ‘shopped’ will be a DATING book. A ‘How to‘ book. Not that I qualify ‘on paper.’ Yet, I certainly qualify when it comes to experience…and in my mind THAT IS ALL THAT MATTERS. The reason for it being a ‘dating book,’ will become apparent to you shortly…Yet, at the same time, I write about life every day and to me, our love lives are such an important part of our existence.

My newly single, chick bestie ‘Firmonnell’ has moved ‘Hustle Barbie’ into her home temporarily. They’re both really close friends of mine…and ‘Hustle’s’ actually single now too. I think she went on some date with a dude in the woods or something?

Wow! That sounds safe! 🙂

We’re obviously such catches. Lol. Whenever ‘Hustle’ goes out with the girls, she comes home mud riddenly filthy. I don’t even know how? She would’ve been to Angelica’s not Old Macdonald’s goddamn farm. So i’m sure her date in the woods, went well. Sure she looked like a Pagent Queen…TO BE BEGIN WITH.

Anyway, ‘Firmonnell’ was seeing if I wanted to hang out with her yesterday…Yet, she knew that I couldn’t or wouldn’t…so presented it to me like this…

‘Are you doing anything Friday, because you can come to mine for drinks? I thought i’d message you first, so you could give me the first brush off..’

And I did. Successfully. Lol. I even replied with a..

‘Brush off complete..’

Like I said, this year, i’m such a shit friend. But not really ‘in heart,’ because I love them all so madly, I treasure them… but certainly when it comes to actual real life appearances. Haha.

Yet, your good friends and your perfect boy/girl love matches will always understand that.

I’ve got a goal and a lot of work I need to do to get there and i’m much closer than I thought I could be to that goal again…So right now, like I always say, i’m going back IN, to not only take what’s mine, but to take all the things that everyone said I could never have.

That’s fighting talk to say i’m a kitten.

(Did, I say ‘kitten?’ Sorry…I meant BITCH.)

Talking about bitchiness…I’m really glad Hayley’s been booted off ‘Love Island.’ Not because she was nasty, but because she was having a bit of free telly ride, without playing the game. You can’t go on Love Island and not DO the ‘love’ part. You can’t shun every single boy and think you’re gonna stay on the show. It’s not, ‘I can’t find a connection’ island and it’s certainly not how reality tv works. Cya Darling!

Glad that i’ve got that off my chest.

Big family day today. I’m really close to my family and with it being Father’s day tomorrow, we’re gonna celebrate being The Wunna’s ALL weekend. It’s what we do. Both Ruby and Junior will be with me all day and I think, as per usual…we’re headed to Doncaster. Ruby’s still bandaged up. (She had a bicycle accident.) And Junior is embracing his family time, with all of his heart. For some reason now, he’s always scared to go to his Dads?

Junior: ‘Please don’t send me there tomorrow. It’s Father’s day and Dad hates Father’s day. I’m scared.’

Luckily the kids are dandy because they have MASSIVE Wunna Land back up. It’s certainly a land run by woman, where the guys are always the bit parts, waiting in the wings.

I’m actually going through another new chapter right now, where you’re going to get to see a really different side to me…Operation ‘Clean Up My Act’ is en route…

Firmonnell: ‘Sounds really dull.’

Hahah. 😉 Love her.

See ya soon!

Thank you for following my life…

FYI/ I’ve written all of this BLIND and without my contact lenses in. I’ve looked like a half naked, 90 year old, horny bat, all the way through it.

Hope that’s made you feel sexy!

Cheers.

 

 

‘Hustle’ is a vegan, she has a pineapple on her kitchen table.

Me: ‘Aww. That’s so cute. She can ***can’t tell you what I actually said*** and then cute to raw pineapples slices afterward.’

 

I’ll Tells You What I Fancy In GUYS…..

Image may contain: 1 person, smiling, sunglasses

Hope you’re having the most beautiful Thursday! Going well for you? I truly hope so. You all deserve a bit of love, luck and happiness. And thank you so much for finding you way to Wunna Land. It’s utterly much appreciated.

I’m quite dandy today and I don’t really know why? But i’m kinda brimming over with the ‘joy joys’ and I love it when that happens, because it’s such a great feeling. It fills my sorry ass soul with light.

You won’t know this, but every morning in Wunna land, Ruby, Junior  (my babies) and I are woken up by a hand picked song, that plays and fills each room in the house. I believe it puts us all in a good mood. I’m a huge music lover. And even if you’re hungover, it’s ace, because it makes you think the party is still going on.

Today’s choice was by my five year old, Baby Junior and it was this…So i’m gonna put it on for you, so you can feel today’s vibe…

*Hit Play Now.*

Then KatyP sends me a whatsapp message stating that we should pack up boxes of super strength dildos, make sure the boxes are labelled ‘SUPER STRENGTH DILDOS‘ and drop them outside each of our friends doorsteps.

KatyP: ‘Claire would expect it to be full. Lol.’

Me: ‘It’s fine, we can just chuck in a couple of kitchen knives and say it’s bondage or summat.’

KatyP: ‘We’ll put a soap on a rope in there too..’

Me: ‘And a teddy to cuddle, for after the ordeal.’

Then she gave me a list of Adult Cereals that went along the lines of ‘Fifty Shades of Grain/Special D/Porn Flakes/Rice Friskies’ that I could consider munching, as  I’m actually a breakfast skipper. (I just do coffee and selfie taking and yeah lol…it’s really bad for your system. You should always have breakfast.) My favourite was ‘Cheery Hoes.‘ So if I do ever consider eating before 9am…

They’d be my first choice of delight.

Away from that, I loved Love Island last night. I still fancy Adam. I don’t know why some people don’t. He’s far too attractive to not adore and his personality, to me… is on point. Like I don’t care if he’s sweet, but egotistical, kind, but cocky…In general, I love that in a guy. I love a guy with ‘gusto.’

Y’know, when they know what they want and how to get it. It not only means they’ve used their brain, yet also learnt along the way of life…and studied girls with a sly carefulness. I don’t mind a guy who fancies himself as a bit of charmer, but only when it’s executed well.  I like ‘smooth’ not cheeky. Cheeky is young. ‘Smooth’ is grow ass man. I like a soft gentleman, mixed in with a delicious roaring swag. I go for sexy. I love sexy.

It’s hot.

I still fill as though the Doctor is gonna get pied off by Rosie, ‘The Solictor’ though. I mean, she used date Jordan Weekender…which means she’s gonna swoop on in for MY ADAM. Haha. Hurrah!! Poor Alex.

I had ace chats about this with my chickadee Zara (who works at Creator Hair in Sheffield) late last night. I think we decided we loved each other and then decided that all men were twats.

Why are they though? We’re proper catches!

Then we talked about cougars and how every young guy goes through his ‘cougar phase.‘ I’m not agest by any means. I can’t afford to be emotionally. Lol.

However, I’ve always ended up with a toyboy. I don’t know whether that’s because i’m the oldest girl in the world, living a young life or because I’ve never found an older man, (apart from ONE..who is my mate ‘Trigg’ who i find extremely attractive. I mean, for 42, he’s a looker. You should stalk his Insta: Simon T Trigg. It’s a grow up girls treat.)

Me: ‘I don’t think a 20 something guy would ever really  seriously consider being with a 30 something yr old girl…long term..’

Zara: ‘You’d be surprised…’

Me: ‘I just don’t think, they’d look to settle down with someone quite a bit older, in the end…It’s just a phase for them. Yeah, we’re by far better women, all grown up, no drama and better in bed…

Zara: ‘When you’re in Sheffield at the end of the month. I know you’ll already have somewhere to stay, but feel free to stay at mine. Oh shit. Wait. And that’s not because you’ve just said you’re good in bed. Hahahahahahaha. 

I love Zara. She’s ace. When she first met me, (at the Weaves & Waves event in Leeds, she came with Sam etc) she didn’t like me and was certainly unsure, then hours in… she thought I was okay and finally, at the very end of the night, she decided she did. I literally love her.  I find her funny, she makes my evil soul fill with laughter. She’s a good find. Aw! Yeah and I saw that Sam BURNT HIS HEAD with straighteners today on his Insta story…

‘Mr. Assured Chrissie Wunna, that HE NEVER BURNS ANYTHING, whilst doing hair.’  

All he did was emoji piss himself at me…then got on with life.

(Ooh, i’ve just got a message in from ‘Firmonnell.’ She’s one of my chick besties,  but she’s in France..camping. Once sec, let me see what she’s got to say, because I miss her…)

It was a snapchat of her face with flower filter ears, Lol…with text reading..

‘Thought you might miss my face…’

Why can’t guys be as thoughtful as girls? Why are we girls all so attentive with one another, yet when we date, the guy’s we’ve chosen (aside from KatyP, who has the most romantic ‘Golfer Jonny’…even though she’s *six day* sore..) are FAR LESS so…? Why are relationships always hard work? They shouldn’t be. But maybe it’s me. That’s why I’M single…always. Lol.

I do love, love and i’m a hopeless romantic. But honestly, where is he? I know we’re not meant to have a perfect man in our heads. But I’m quite happy being single until that man rocks up..I don’t think i’m a bad woman. I think i’m a great woman. And my imaginary perfect man, isn’t made up of a list like most girls, it is all based upon how he would make me FEEL. That’s all I care about. Alongside handsome, sexy and stable.

I love eye candy. It’s always been a part of me that’s been really shallow.

I will always want to be with a really attractive man, provided his personality matches up to his looks. So technically, I’m balanced. 😉

Someone’s just sent me a link to read. I click on it, and all it does is unfold me really really slloooowly, then it states as a headline, ‘Paris Hiltons British Best Friend, slips a nips during photoshoot.’ 

Thrilling news…

Love you,

Chrissie x

Image may contain: Chrissie Wunna, outdoor

 

 

Stress, Love, Boys & Dickheads

Image may contain: 1 person, close-up

Oh my GOD! I’ve been having the most stressful time. Lol. It’s been hideous. I kinda just want to hide under my duvet for months, until life turns ace again! Right now, i’m on ‘rest’ and I’m never going on ‘rest’ again. I’d rather burn the candle at both ends, than be anything near, this jolly term of EVIL, that my superiors have labelled ‘rest.’ It literally only gets me into trouble. I swear on my life, it’s been crackers. I don’t do crackers. Well…unless their prawn. 😉

Resting should never be done and only fine when placed in front of the words ‘bitch face.’

The good thing however, is that Junior’s had a birthday. My Baby son, who (alongside Ruby) is my world, has officially turned FIVE. I love him so dearly, that i oculd fill up, right now,  even telling ya. Unfortunately, (as there’s always got to be a party pooper,) his father (who’s a previous ‘party boy,’ now turned Jehovah’s Witness,) and I, do NOT see the world through the same EYES. Let’s just say, I’m in Dior sunnies and he’s….. obviously BLIND. 🙂 But we co parent Junior. We share a son.

Basically, I wanted to make sure my son celebrated the day he was born, as LIFE in general, is SO deliciously important, in my mind and well Keiran, (his Papa)…is utterly against such apparent ‘Tom Foolery’ (due to God and stuff) and informed Junior that if he did not chose to work for ‘Jehovah,’ when he grows up… when he DIES,  he will not go to paradise?

EH?? He’s FIVE. What’s Paradise? Issho on a Sunday? That’s bonkers. Let us pray for YOU, Daddio.

Anyway, I won..and we flipping celebrated my baby son’s birthday for FOUR DAYS STRAIGHT.

Wunna:1

Jehovah: 0

I’m certainly exhausted, but whatever, it was worth every PIECE of glitter ball energy. No one loves a shindig more than my boy.

Now, when I co parent, I don’t always know what’s best for my son? We as parents always just do the best we can, with what we know, right? But I know what really ISN’T right and I know what doesn’t sit well with me. And I will say, that the great thing about Keiran and I, is that we both love our son, madly. However, the MAJOR difference between us, is that I prefer to ask & listen to Junior’s needs and go with what he tells me he loves….instead of telling him what he HAS to do, or force a religion upon him and basically because i’m not….. *swear here* deluded.

Rant over. Back to fairytales.

It’s just hard because I’m so glad that I’m no longer with Keiran or married to him anymore. It’s been years and it’s been so wonderful being free. And he’d say the same. Yet my son, who I love more than life itself….has to hang out with him…. twice a week and recite the Bible. Surely that confuses his soul?

*Rolls Eyes.*

Anyway…moving on….No… shit does not… end there…

Like it couldn’t get any worse… life wanted to pull the rug from right under me AGAIN…

Cheers! Wahey!

..and one merry thing, after another merry thing, all decided to lose its mind and venture it’s way ‘tits‘ up. FRIDAY, was literally the worst day ever. Lol. I got so stressed, I could’ve exploded. But hey, exploding is better than imploding.  The cat ran away (and i’m not surprised. Haha. I can’t find Rocco anywhere, and each one of us is devastated.) I was then embarrassed and shouted at in the middle of Ego’s garden area, by a dude who called me a ‘Bad Mum.’

Jenna: ‘As if you were embarrassed. You’re never embarrassed. i should video this..’

Infact,  this is what he said…

‘Right, i’m gonna be honest with you….EVERYBODY LISTEN….I’ve been off my face on cocaine for the last three days and I could kidnap your *points at me*  kids if I wanted to.’

LOVELY!

Then he loses the plot on me….and after a wee ‘DOO DAA,’ (and I’m labelling that lightly…)

..It all kinda went wrong for him….I think? I mean, the beautiful staff at Ego, sorted his sorry arse out…and saved my delicious honour.

Kim (Ego): ‘He’s been asked to leave…’

I literally had to turn around to Ruby, who said,

‘Mum, he told me he knew you, he said he was your friend because he knows you off Instagram.’

‘No Ruby. If someone knows me off Instagram. They aren’t always my real friend. He doesn’t know me at all… What did he ask you?’

‘My name. Where I live? What school I go to? How old I was? He said I looked just like you…’

‘Please, pleeeease, don’t talk to a stranger ever again. Sometimes, it’s not safe.’

And in that moment, I kinda realised that everything was changing…and for the first time ever, I had to teach my daughter to distrust, because of my career choice. This IS a NEW chapter and that moment with the crazy dude, AT FIRST.. made me never want to go out again, or have to talk to ‘strangers’ that I didn’t know, during my free time. Like it wasn’t or isn’t worth the drama.

Then my friends gathered around me and stood by with utter support...(I have wonderful friends,  family and support. I’m so lucky, it’s unbelievable.)

And just like that….I slept on it and once again, I felt moderately mighty. Don’t call someone a bad parent, when  you’re a ‘self confessed’ druggie father. It’s not how it works. Don’t think you know everything about me, when you’ve only seen a handful of pictures on Instagram. Don’t embarrass me in front of everyone, simply because it makes you feel less weak.

Don’t do it in front or around my children….EVER. I try to keep them balanced and away from panic. You didn’t have my permission to invade our personal time or space. Don’t show up to a party that you’re not invited to.

Common etiquette.

On Friday, I either wanted to get back to work, or to jet off on a sunny holiday. (Code for: A glamourous way of burying my head in the sand.)

It kinda made me feel more exhausted and a little weary of people and that’s not a good combo of fun, is it? I hate that. I’m a positive soul and that’s all wrong. I want to protect what’s mine and have no one mess with that ever. I only want to be around those who know me truly and nowhere near those, who really don’t. I’m tired of being judged. But accept that I always will be.

And yeah  this may sound really grumbly, but I’m actually super okay about it all now. I just needed to vent it out loudly. So, from the bottom of my Pina Colada heart, I thank you ALL for listening. ..

Being ‘on rest’ has tired me out more than anything. Lol. I’m stressed out, because of it. But, I’ll shush, cos it’s only temporary. But GOD! How many shitty things can happen to someone in 24 hours. It’s been shocking. Being at work, keeps you focused.

Keeps you out of trouble.

Today’s a new day and I just need a moment to ACTUALLY relax. Actually chill. I could nap all day. But I won’t, will I? Instead i’ll galavant.

Infact, I went for a couple of drinks last night to destress and I loved it. It helped so much. KatyP is now back from her forest cabin trip. Thank God. Before she left, she began a saucy rumour about a DUTY FREE SIZED TOBERLONE... and my vagina. (Hahah.) We laughed so much, we cried…then she f***** off to Norfolk. (I don’t even know if that’s where she went? Lol)

Claire: ‘I’m glad you get what a Mars Bar party is Chrissie…Anyway, I heard about you and Duty Free Toberlone. Haha’

Me: ‘Haha. That honestly, never happened…It’s Kate’s fault. I’m gonna start a rumour about HER, for when she comes back.’

Last night was fun because I was surrounded by friends….Julie, Scotty, Claire, Ian, Golfer Jonny, His mate Barney, KatyP.. and a whole lot of faces that I kinda knew anyway, were scattered throughout the bar. It got me back to normal and I needed that. I really needed that. I’ve just been knackered.

I’m excited to go again and get back to work. I’m only on ‘rest’ because when you have a job that entails continuous drinking, partying, late nights, early mornings, and travelling, you run your body down quite quickly. But you also run yourself out mentally…Yet, your mind needs to be sound, because you have to write it all out and influence every little bit, as you go along.

The thing that I hadn’t been doing is eating well. I shouldn’t say this, but I’ll tell you the truth… I haven’t sat down and had a full proper meal, in weeks. Everything’s been a snack here, a ‘graze’ there…a nibble…or nothing at all, and my system has been flooded with work, cocktails, fun and life.

I’m really close to my family and  both my parents are doctors…So, whenever I do a big work stint…we all check in, with my agent and make sure i’m healthy, replenished and dandy, before I shimmie off again. It’s like being a sportmans, but when your sport is LIFE.

It’s nothing like being a sportsman! Haha. It’s way less sweaty.

Anyway, everyone keeps asking me about my love life? I haven’t talked about it for a while, because it’s ‘dead air.’ Lol. No one fancies me. No one’s talking to me. Lol. Everyone’s ‘pieing‘ me off. 😉 Nothing exciting is happening, at all.

Yesterday, I was all ‘love needy.’ Today, I’ve grown up…and I can’t be arsed with the drama of a potential relationship. I’m happy. I’m really happy and it’s gonna take a really great MAN, to walk in, step up and share a life with me….as under no circumstances ever, will I give up my own happiness, JUST TO ‘couple up,’ if he’s not my soul mate.

 I know what I want and I’m refusing to sell myself short.

Plus, when it comes to love, even though, I write my life out for the world to read….this isn’t ‘SHOW,’ where I NEED to fall in love for ratings…It ain’t  ‘Love Island,’ this is REAL LIFE, where grown ups reside, feel and live. It’s not ‘story boarded’ or perfectly produced….it’s written per stiletto step, as I go along….

I never know what’s going to happen to me…I only know that no matter what, in the end it will be wonderful.

Chrisse x

ps/ Do not settle for something your soul does not deserve.

 

 

 

 

 

When Wunna Did Sheffield! [Part One ;) ]

Image may contain: Chrissie Wunna, outdoor

So, I’ve just got back from Sheffield. If you’ve been following my ‘socials’ (mainly my Instagram Story @chrissiewunna) you will absolutely be aware of that. I ended up getting home at 1.17am Monday morning, simply because I was so utterly knackered and fell asleep on my train, after filling my entire body with cocktails and eating a giant Whopper burger. I totally missed my stop…and ended up in flipping NEWCASTLE at around 10pm..by ACCIDENT. Zara, who works at The Creator Salon, in Sheffield, well she offered to throw me a ‘life line’ of ‘need any help babe?’ At that point I suggested that she simply hire someone to find me and throw me onto train tracks or summat?’

I was DONE! I was HAD. Life got the better of my sorry cocktailed ass.

But..

My time in Sheffield was a delight. It was AMAZING and a lot more amazing than I thought it was gonna be, if i’m being honest. I’m Yorkshire anyway, so when you tinker off to work in in the same land, but on different turf, it’s kinda more like a ‘staycation than anything. It’s made me ADORE a ‘staycation’ and now I truly believe that people should do it MORE often. I honestly, had THE TIME OF MY ENTIRE LIFE. 

If I could describe my time in the city…I’d say….

It was a fun filled swirl of complete & utter decadent MADNESS!

I checked into The Novotel, in Sheffield city centre on Sunday & immediately the staff couldn’t be more helpful. They’re young. They’re cool. But they’re warm. The service was literally impeccable.(Esther…You are delightful and hilarious. Sorry, i almost got you done. 🙂 I have that effect on people.) 

Image may contain: 1 person

And fair enough they’re aware that i’m going to blog about my stay…I’m not an idiot. However, I watch and scan everything…and not only is that place peaceful, calm and designed so beautifully. It boasts a modern edge of glamour, with a meandering contemporary ‘ooh,’ the service all around, was first rate…I love that the hotel felt so relaxing, because nothing to me is worse than a bustle ridden ‘staycation.‘ I have a busy life. I yearn for peace.

The bar was swanky, the bartender was ‘winks,’ the indoor heated pool was private and my suite was perfectly ‘city‘ and divine. In general I love a masculine or moody looking suite. I don’t know why that is? I like it to look like a New York Business man’s stop off? It’s my favourite feeling when I’m hotelling it?  I much prefer it to light & fluffy…and maybe because it either makes me feel POWERFUL, or just balances ‘comfort’ with ‘work,’ so I stay focused. (Everyone always thinks i’m just tossing it off and socializing. It’s actually work. Don’t be getting it twisted.) 

I will say that The Novotel, they remembered the small things. I’m a ‘it’s the small things that matter’ kinda girl. (Well, apart from in certain departments. 😉 I like gents to be accompanied by the correct  sized trouser ‘bulge.’ I find it such a turn on. I cant even help it? It literally drives me wild…& i’m certainly not apologizing for it. Lol) But, yes…the ‘small things.’ I was Instagram story posting, the bartender spotted my Insta Story within seconds…He noticed that I asked you, to remind me to snack…and in a jiffy brought me over a tiny pot of nuts… with a grin. 😉

I was really impressed. And I love to feel impressed. This goes for work, service ANYWHERE and when it comes to guys.

I got to my room, after two wines and as soon as I checked in, to get showered & ready, I received a little *tipper tapper* at my door. I kitty dash to over, and I’m wrapped in a towel, after 20 minutes of showering, selfie taking, story loading and spying into other people’s windows, in the nude. (I only found Tupac. He wasn’t arsed about me.) I peek through the peeky hole and with a warm and chipper ‘door swing,‘ I was gifted with the most delicately beautiful dessert, with a handwritten note reading:

‘Dear Ms Wunna,

Wishing you a warm welcome to Sheffield. Hope you have a lovely stay with us and enjoy you time in the city.

Kind Regards, Beatrice.’

Image may contain: food

 

I love a handwritten note…It makes me feel all special. It’s old school and delicious. It was certainly a perfect ‘work’ break. What I love about that place, is that they’re VERY MUCH aware that i’m going to be cheeky, with a sophisticated dash of charm and selfie with a ‘wink,’ which often includes zero clothes and maybe sexually suggested picture taking, with the addition of moderate swearing and nude spying. And that is absolutely fine with them. No probs. No issues!

They’re all ‘Let the Kitten do her work. ‘ Hahah

I adore companies, that refrain from judging influencers, simply because they’re a bit naughty or a wee bit ‘sexy’ and instead are smart enough to use that ‘power‘ to their advantage, in order to build attention, or invite in, a new audience.

Over the last 2 days, my story views were the highest of ALL TIME.

Over the last 2 days, I finally grew to love a Sheffield. And I say that because it was a city that I’d kinda forgotten about, really? I mean, if you’re from Sheffield, don’t forget to seek through it, enjoy it, find new bits and love it. There’s so much you can do and often, like long term relationships….when you see something or have something all the time, you kinda forget how special it is, or can be.

I had a blast…and my adventure there hand’t even really begun yet…

A couple interviews, whatsapp chats with my Leeds crew and a quick meeting later… I was dressed, and ready to go meet a friend at Kuckoo, Sheffield.

Now, I’m not someone who’s EVER going to stay in, when in a new city, a new hotel…with new excitement. I LOVE GOOD TIMES, I find my own fun and every inch of me intended to take that piece of ‘city’ and make it MINE for the night.

What could possibly go wrong! 😉

I strutted through street crowds, the bustle and a whole bunch of people dancing and drinking at street stands. They were all dressed really casual. But I was tinkering through, in my heels and orange dress. There was a vibe in the air. A sexy ‘testosterony’ energy. A ‘magic.‘ The city was actually packed. It was filled to the brim with ‘bank holiday’ life…Everyone was out! There was BUZZ around certain corners….An excitement…a ‘flutter.’ But I did notice that night, that the streets, bars of Sheffield were completely FILLED WITH GUYS!

Where were the girls at?

I tottered through the city streets. I think I was on Leopold Square or something? I have no sense of direction and I don’t care because I usually always find my way somewhere, right? Lol.

Me: ‘Where the fuck am I?’ I’m by the Leopold Hotel or something?’

AG: ‘Just keep walking… I can come find you. Wait..’

Me: ‘I don’t need you to find me. Just tell me where to go…’

AG was already there waiting for me. I’m usually never late, but whatever, I got lost mid totter…and had to walk through the maddest Latin street party ever. Lol

I finally got to a large door, with a small stair way and I could see a warm ‘red lit’ ooze of sexy, cocktail dripped lushness, radiating…

Me: ‘I’m here, I’m walking in now…’

On Sunday, at around 8pm….I strutted into Kuckoo….

 

 

 

Boodee, House of Lily & 3 Pumps For You Sir!

Image may contain: 1 person

Me: ‘We’ve all got knickers, as in pants on right?’

Cece: ‘Yeah. I’ve definitely got pants on. We’ve all got pants on…She hasn’t though…(Points at girl.) I mean, we’re old. They’re young and don’t where pants. But there was a young girl, who I was fitting, who clearly said she had spanx on.’

Rocker Lily: ‘I’ve got pants on.’

ALL GOOD! SAFETY FIRST!

Now, before I get into all that, as you ALL know that I was at the Boodee Boutique,Influencers Brunch’ on Sunday, at ‘Cuckoo’ in Leeds. My ‘socials’ and inboxes are going CRAZY CRACKERS over it.

I’ve never ever been to ‘Cuckoo’ in my life and I’m known for socialiting cocktail bars like a champion. It’s absolutely new, a tremendous find and it drips with a chilled out, bouji swirl of swag. It’s… COOL. It’s alive. It’s stylish, glamourous, yet not remotely pretentious and you get a free flipping pizza with your drink!

Image may contain: people sitting, drink and indoor Image may contain: shoes

Bartender: ‘Are you wanting the free pizza..?’

Me: ‘Noo, course not. I’m fine. Lol.

Bartender: ‘I didn’t think so, somehow. 😉 ‘

There’s just a vibe in that place… and ‘old school/new school’ vibe and if you were a child of the 80’s/90’s you will find the music deliciously swag. I ‘Pon De Replayed’ it…. like I WAS….. RIHANNA. (Don’t hate. You could’ve *swiggled it* too. In fact, Hit *play* to feel like you were there with me. See! Aren’t I nice to you! 😉 )

But let me take you back…The train into Leeds, was the busiest ‘Bank Holiday’ train of madness ever. It was filled with young gaggles of party boys, older couples, girls and a group of posh Geordies. (I’ve decided that Geordies are everywhere.)

I had begun the day feeling like a bit of a plonker, as it was early Sunday morning and I was strutting around life, petrol stations, Xscape, wine bars and Platform 2’s in a GIANT fluffy PINK faux fur, diamante heels, necklace and head to toe in PINK & WHITE.

I knew, I either looked marvellous or ridiculous because everyone was staring at me…constantly….and so much to the point that I’d started to feel moderately insecure. Lol. That’s why I had a wine, in the nearest bar, which was The Winter Seam, before my train. The problem with me is that I’ll feel ‘all the eyes.’ which it will make me very aware of my existence…It’ll then make me feel a bit ‘wibbly.’ but you would NEVER EVER know because I will strut into a place, IN MY GIANT PINK FAUX FUR, like i’m P.Diddy. (In fact, if Paris Hilton, Ru Paul, P.Diddy had a threesome, and did it whilst eating a bag of prawn crackers…THAT’S what I looked like. 🙂 )

Luckily, I looked less like a dickhead 3 minutes afterwards, because guys in budget  ‘Stag Do’ Hawaiian shirts began drizzling in…and then even they were *trumped* by the casual floral dress  ‘rocker’ lady with the bright blue hair. Then another Geordie appeared out of nowhere, said I was ‘stunning‘ and asked me where I was headed? (Told you, they’re everywhere. They’ve infiltrated Yorkshire. They’ve infiltrated Leeds.)

Me: ‘I’m off to a brunch in Leeds. I’m not just dressed like this for a fry up. Honest…’

He then asked me for my number, after he smirked at my obviously wonderful banter. 😉 So, I did that ‘Chrissie Wunna’ charm face, where I just smile, shrug, slide off my bar stool and laugh it off, like it hasn’t been said, as I giggle out the door.

Next minute I was in Leeds city centre. It was filled with bustle and I didn’t feel as strange anymore as EVERYONE  was dolled up to the heavens and back.

I diamante strutted down the side of the train station, to Call Lane, through busy city streets, car parks, alley ways, puddles, gave a homeless person a light and past a ton of young 20 somethings who were galloping around with excitement….I kinda felt like The Queen of all Leeds, at that point.  Then I walked past ‘Mission’ which reminded me that Zanetti was doing better than Me.

37, Call Lane. I was at ‘Cuckoo.’ The street seemed so quiet, so I carefully tinkered through the door and..

OH MY GOD….

*Camera Flashes, Music, Balloons, Cocktails, Skimpy Dresses, Highest Heels, Giggles, Laughter, Lip Gloss, Selfie Stations, Madness…*

It looked like the most marvellous place on Earth. Literally a Glamour Pusses DREAM. Firstly, it was filled to the brim with the most ‘dolled up‘ beautiful young girls, you will have ever seen in your life…and secondly, as I told you early, the most glamourously ‘cool’ buzz *fast swirled* through that entire place, like wildfire. (And I was only downstairs at first.)

A huge floral wall by ‘Orla Flora’ greeted you….(they’re really IN right now, aren’t they and taking the place of the ‘Media Board’ for a while.) If you have no clue, what I’m on about…. it’s  basically a huge wall made up of flowers, that you picture by, at events…Any event…Weddings, Parties…Whatever….and I LOVE THEM. (I didn’t have my picture taken by the floral wall, whist I was there, because I was too busy drinking and being on the phone to my friend, but I did notice how strikingly beautiful it was.) 

Image may contain: 2 people, people standing

Image may contain: 1 person, standing

GIANT PINK bespoke printed balloons (by Instagram @balloonroomx) filled the room, as young influencers and hopeful future influencers selfied, pictured and pouted by them for content..

The balloons were actually really cute, because they were giant and pink, with the words,

‘YOU DO YOU BOO’

..printed upon them.

It was just ace…

So, let me just fill you in. I appeared at the BOODEE BOUTIQUE, ‘Influencers Brunch,’ which is a glamourous afternoon networking event, for all those who are wanting to be ‘Insta Famous,’ an Influencer, a Blogger, Vlogger, those who want to start building their own business or empire, or those who already have….Well, it was a brunch for chicas of that sort…as they could all meet each other, network and at the same time go around the stalls set up by companies & brands (who are currently looking for influencers to promote their lines) and go make themselves known. Pretty much all the brands where looking for ‘the new face of…’ so they were scouting and casting through the crowds of girls. It was dripped in cocktail magic and the dress code was ‘pink & white.’ (And everything about this business, or any business is about MEETING PEOPLE. It is networking.)

Got it?

Cece: ‘Hi, have you been upstairs yet? I saw you walk in. You stuck out like a sore thumb. Here’s a card for House Of Lily. I was just seeing if you wanted to come upstairs and try some of our clothes for pictures….We’re casting for the new face…’

I’m like stood in my pink faux fur, guzzling wine and texting…But there was just something about ‘Cece’ that I loved. It was the fun in her eyes…So I took the card and she disappeared into the crowds.

Then little Baby Doll ‘Charlie C’ (instagram @charliecaitlyn) caught eyes with me and dashed up, with hugs and smiles…(She is as cute as a button and kinda hot as hell.) She pretty much thanked me for coming and within seconds has *whizzed* me upstairs to go and meet everyone….

Image may contain: 5 people, indoor Image may contain: 1 person, indoor

Image may contain: indoor Image may contain: 1 person, smiling, indoor

Charlie C: ‘I need you to meet Lisa…’

Me: ‘OH! HI! IT’S GREAT TO MEET YOU..’

Charlie C: ‘No…That’s not Lisa…That’s…’

Me: ‘Oh sorry. Hahaha. Nice to meet you anyway…

(We were literally hand in hand, rushing through the crowds of girls….)

Charlie C: ‘Chrissie. Wait here. I need to grab you a candle. It’s a bloggers candle…and you have a gift bag…Here! Take that!….Oh! That’s Lisa…’

Me: ‘Have I just met her downstairs?’

‘Charlie C’ was one of the girls running the event. She’s young, beautiful, Leeds and bubbly and was dashing about like some kind of stunning ‘headless’ chica of ‘ooh laa.’ She did REALLY WELL, as that event was DIVINE. To the point where I even stopped her at the end…to see if she’d throw me an event..

That girl is so young, but so good at what she does..She is the future Queen of Party Leeds.

Anyway, I felt like a glamourous Veteran at the Boodee event, as everyone around me was so young, I’d say from 18 upwards…There were SO MANY GIRLS, all done up and brimming with hopefulness and it was made me realise how many young people in this actual day and age want to be ‘Influencers.’ It’s the new dream job. I can’t believe how competitive it was, well IS and the girls were every INCH stunning.

They were immaculate.

I agree, that they’re all under really great pressure and I can see the pressure on their faces and I agree that it’s such a hard time for them to grow up in, with everything seeming so ‘social media’ perfect. Their stars and inspirations are the popular bloggers, vloggers and Instagrammers of today. And I feel like, they feel as though, they have a lot to try and accomplish, to get to where they want to be. I’m sure it makes them feel insecure, yet it’s the CONFIDENT ONES that smash through the barriers.

(And I can pick those girls right out of a crowd.)

Yet, the thing that made me smile was the fact that RIGHT NOW, INT HIS TIME, being a BLOGGER/Influencer is such a THING.’ When I started my blog 10 years ago in Hollywood...NOT A SINGLE SOUL was blogging, or giving any shits about blogging…People were making FUN OF for writing an online diary….

NOW! It’s one of the MOST LUCRATIVE CAREERS you can have! (IN YOUR FACE!) So firstly, I’m lucky because I accidentally built by blog up over 10 years, so didn’t really have to start from scratch..I did it all the way through my modeling & tv career…Secondly, I’m old….and so to be smashing it about ‘socially’ at 37 is huge, because you just wouldn’t have thought it could happen. But it has.

Anyway, whenever I go to an event, I do the room scan, I chat to everyone I want, I try to meet everyone and then whilst drinking all the cocktails, in all the land, I’ll then just do what I want. 🙂

Me: ‘I kinda just wanna get pissed now..’

I found Lisa, the owner of ‘House Of Lily.’ She was casting for the new faces of her brand. They had a shoot set organised for the girls, who were choosing something to try on, being fitted into it and then being photographed.

Image may contain: 1 person, standing Image may contain: 1 person, smiling, standing

I loved watching the girls, because it reminded me of being young at model casting days. It was far less glam though and I never heard this:

House of Lily: ‘Make sure the girls are tucking their tops in properly…I don’t want any boobs out…’

 Image may contain: 2 people, people smiling, people standing

I looked through all of ‘House Of Lily’s’ pieces and they were absolutely beautiful. She’s so talented. I mean, tweed fitted jackets, stunning long sequin dresses, patterned jump suits, see through lace Pussy bow blouses….Each piece was so special and so unique…I was in love!  There is so much that is just SO ME from that brand. I’m gonna meet up with Lisa again and take a look through everything properly with her personally, because her line is remarkable and at an event, it’s really difficult after prosecco.

From that point….my afternoon changed. I don’t know what happened, but I kinda brought the *jiggy* (like I do, I mean lets face it, i’m a chip off the ‘Hilton’ brand, I’ve been raised to ‘party’ and do it fucking well.

Me: ‘I need to drink my body weight in wine..’

Rocker Lils: ‘Shall we get sambuca shots.’

Cece: Chrissie, get in an outfit and picture with it please.’

Me: ‘I honestly can’t be bothered to take ALL OF MY CLOTHES OFF at 37, to put them all back on again right now.’

Then fresh wine was poured and our beautiful cup caked, lily vased, booth…turned into a party. 🙂

Image may contain: 1 person, smiling, indoor Image may contain: plant and flower

So, I basically ‘lowered the tone…’ glamourously of course! Lol.

Me: ‘We’ve all got knickers or pants on right?’

Cece: ‘Yeah. I’ve definitely got pants on.

I ‘d already decided to ‘get comfy,’ at this point, because I loved the girls. I started drinking, and dancing in the booth, and multi tasked it with selfie and videoing taking for my insta/facebook.snapchat stories. ‘PR Lauren’ sat pissing herself at me, in awe. (I went with ‘awe,’ but she was again either staring at me like I was amazing or nuts? You decide.) We might have had a ‘pose off’ also for selfies.

Cece: ‘Look at you. Please tell me it’s real! You have some life. I want it. I want you meet my daughter.’

(She has the most eye catching mixed raced daughter, who floors it in the beauty stakes. I saw a picture of her on her phone and I was blown away.)

Cece: So, you’ve done Playboy….Have you been to mansion and met Hefner?’

Me: ‘Yeah course. Gosh. I wasn’t a *girlfriend,* I modelled for the brand, which is really different…As the *girlfriends* had to pump him. Lol. I think it was something like *3 pumps* and then the next one?

Cece: ‘Hahaha. There’s me thinking he was some kind of Don, when he could only manage 3 pumps and you’re off.’

Me: ‘Well he’s old int’ he and he has to have them ALL pump him, one at a time and watch…I’m sure they were fine with it, it’s only 3 pumps and a weekly allowance. Hahahaha! It was like a grand a week or something.’

Cece: ‘Y’see, I don’t hate on them at ALL for that. A girl’ll do what a girl will do. I’d 3 pump him for that.

Me: ‘Lol. Me too. I just didn’t have the opportunity too. ‘

Cece: ‘Would you?’

Rocker Lils: ‘Noooo, I couldn’t.’

PR Lauren: *BLUSHES*…I don’t know if…’

Rocker Lils: ‘Actually, now I think about it, I might… I’d do more than 3 pumps though. I’m gonna with yeah…

Me: ‘You’d end up bloody married to him!’

And that was the tone of the rest of the evening. It was THE BEST…WE WERE IN FITS OF LAUGHTER and we’re all Yorkshire, so we’re properly down to Earth, don’t care, say whatever we want kinda gals and it’s amazing!

House of Lily: ‘We might have found the girl/girls for the brand….There was one girl that I can’t find…Go find her Cece…’

Cece: ‘Go find her! You go find her. I don’t know what she looks like or where she’s chuffing gone. It’s packed in here. Lol.’

I just LOVE northern bits of tinker…because if I was in LA I would’ve heard…

‘Honey, can you go get me that gurl already.’

If I was in London… They would’ve have been ‘darling darling’ posh.

In Yorkshire, they’re like..

‘For chuffs sake…’

…and I love it.

Literally the most amazing afternoon brunch of wild girly madness….swirled in a fantasy red lighting, with unicorn balloons and giant carousel decor surrounding me.

All the girls that day looked amazing and the all did so fantastically. Well, I hope they did. I hoped they networked well.

I WILL SAY HOWEVER, that I did notice that even though the girls were immaculately beautiful, a lot of the girls did look ‘samey.’ (I actually got told off for saying that out loud. Lol)

Me: They all look the same. I’m trying to scan through the crowd for something different or someone who tries to POP OUT.’ They look the same, but they’re all different girls? And they’re wearing the same…

Cece: ‘It’s a bloody themed dress code you idiot.’

I’m a personality girl and yes, the glam thing always works, it’s part of the job. I do it at 37 and i’ve done it all the way through my teens until now. And being in LA at the time, we took it to the next level. Yet, through that crowd of girls, there needed to be a ballsy, sassy, ‘stand out’ girl, who strutted in, didn’t care what anyone thought, looked amazing, was of great character and someone who was just unforgettable. Someone who oozed so much confidence that she OWNED THAT ENTIRE ROOM…Someone who you spoke to and was completely and utterly taken by!

A STAR! (‘Types’ SMASH IT.)

I did actually see one, but I can’t tell you who… (No, it wasn’t me, you twats…Lol.)

Great night. Ended up going to Gino’s for a quick wine, which was filled with Italian waiters and a suited party of gents who were all talking about boring things like football and how much they reckoned Rugby players got paid. (I watched them and ate pink wafers out my goody bag.)

Got the train home. Slept through my stop. Absolutely fucking nightmare. (A little lovely Geordie lady nudged me away with a ‘Petal’ and I shocked up with a ‘OH SHIT!!!’ She just smiled and like a Guardian Angel solved all my life problems…Told you, they’re everywhere.)

I ended up having to walk for ages, in my giant pink faux fur and as soon as I got home, I collapsed in a heap on my bed.

Hope you had a phenomenal Easter! Thank you for following my life. Thank you for following my ‘socials.’

Two days and I fly to Spain.

Image may contain: 1 person, smiling

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Girls Nights, Cocktails & A Random Brave Message..

Image may contain: 1 person

Morning!!! So sorry, I couldn’t whizzle out a little bit of ‘diary’ yesterday. I don’t know what happened?  I just decided to  surrender to ‘knackeredness’ after the weekend. I felt tired and hungover and both my babies are currently off school, so I found myself having to slide through tunnels in the sunshine, whilst having a picnic. Even though that sounds delightful to some….the park is NOT a place to be hungover. Bottom line…Ruby & Junior LOVED it and I guess, when it comes to life and parenting…that’s all that matters.

I now, NEVER blog when I’m shattered, as my story always lacks the essential ‘gusto.’ And I also try to refrain from blogging when drunk (these days)…as like tipsy texting…the blog is very rarely written by me and often should be credited to vodka. (Yet, I do adore a Wunna drunk blog. The last one ended in me being sick.) 

Okay, so Saturday evening, I worked, I mummied and with a *wink* and a *shimmie,* I managed to FIT INTO my ‘diet dress‘ deliciously designed by The Kardashians, glam up, damn up and venture over to The Electric Theatre for ‘Fairytales’ 30th birthday. (I don’t do weight loss via scales and tape measures…I do it via goal dresses.)

Right, I haven’t seen all the girls, apart from ‘Firmonnell’ (who is my chick best friend,) in a really long while. My life tinkered me in a completely different direction….a far less bumpy road, filled with magic and selfie taking 😉 . Work & passion took my hand, things got busy, dreams came true and I sort of had to look behind me and *wave* them off, as I focused, on doing me, happiness and everything i’ve always wanted to.

(I told you, this is the chapter of my life, where I am being a shit friend…down to work.)

So, regardless, it was really good to bump into everyone, even though we couldn’t really ‘catch up.’ We dedicated the night to ‘Fairytale,’ who looked divine, tipsy and not even nearly 30! And we were there to make sure she knew that we adored her….via booze.

I was there first, even though the girls has NAGGED ME to make sure I turned up. I sent them a snapchat, after seeing they still had rollers in their hair and a boozy ‘ring of fire’ going on around a dining table. Lol.

‘You dicks. Don’t rush me here, when you’re not even fucking ready, let alone nearly HERE! Hustle’s still got rollers in! You’re shit friends. I’m here first. Lol’

They arrived…Pissed…and began hugging ans lip smooching me.

Firmonnell: ‘I feel really discombobulated from you right now!’

Me: ‘I feel like I have so much to say, but I can’t say it. I think it’s shocked my system being around everyone.’

(It was sort of like going back in time….glamourously, of course. We’re ‘dress up’ gals by nature, so we don’t like to look shit. There was one on the stage, one at the bar, two on the sofa and one squatted outside by a barrel and a play area with her hands over her mouth in shock. Lol But we all still looked fabulous.) 

WE DON’T PLAY.

I got to chitter with Mel, eye talk with ‘Firmonnell,’ have a dance with ‘Hustle Barbie’ and private convo with ‘Double B.’ (Who still fucking cracks me up.)

What I DID notice is how much my life has actually changed. I didn’t really notice until that night. Lol. I also realized that even though I don’t miss that part of 2017 at all, I do value my individual relationships with them. I prefer meeting them individually. I’ve actually met ‘Firmonnell’ a lot. We actually each have really different relationships with each other.

I also noticed that since my merry absence….they’ve all got skinnier and they’ve all got naughtier…

I absolutely LOVE IT.

These girls are  living FOR THEM, right now and nothing makes me *sizzle* more!

LIFE IS ABOUT CELEBRATING YOU, YOUR CHOICES, OWNING YOUR PATH AND GETTING HAPPY.

People waste so much time ‘thumb twiddling’ and being concerned over what others think. These girls are hilarious. The amount of times I heard…

‘I can do what I want’

…almost made my spine tingle. Lol. I’m a ‘do what I want’ kinda kitten. That’s why we adore each other.  I love listening to all their drama. It’s my favourite. And they’d listen to mine, all day, every day! But, right now….my life just seems so easy and peaceful.

Their drama trumps mine ‘errday.’

There was a moment when ‘Hustle’ (who looked beautiful) was perched on the edge of the sofa, that I was sat on, wondering whether the drink, she was drinking, was hers and said…

‘So, how IS everything you? What’s going on?’

And I didn’t know what to say….? And I don’t know why I didn’t know what to say? I just didn’t? Everything’s kinda really great right now and i think I daren’t say it out loud, in case ‘The Gods’ hear and fuck me over.

I’m doing what I love….and it’s accidentally going really well. I think, I’m still safe with that.

I didn’t really do much that night, I just chilled and chatted, because i’d rolled off a hectic week. I ‘caught up’ and stood with wine….But it was great to see everyone, and celebrate ‘Fairytale’ turning 30.

I have some great chick friends. I’m lucky. We make our own choices…Laugh about them. Cry about them…But value each others ways…

Then Sunday morning…

I woke up….

I rolled over in my sheets, grabbed my phone and scrolled through my emails. (I love naked, bed sheeted, kitten rolls, in the morning…as it means, if you have time to do them…. you’re not in a rush…)

Found a random one with ‘Noticed you at Electric Theatre ..Proposal’ as the subject title….

So, I clicked on it…and it read…

‘Chrissie

Tonight I noticed you at the electric theatre on a number of occasions at the birthday party.

I crossed eyes with you at the bar, while I was on a break between sets with the band – hope you had a good night out?

Little did I realize until now, that I was looking at a model/blogger from round the corner.

Your blogs are a really good read at first glance …….it says in your blogs that you believe in love at first sight ……well…….?

As they say in Yorkshire , if ya don’t ask ya don’t get…….so I’d be intrigued to know if you noticed me or just wondered why the hell was a guy staring at you…..but I guess you are used to that when you stand out like a sore thumb!

X’

Now, I’ll be honest…and say that I don’t really recall ‘catching eyes’ at the bar, with anyone? All I remember at the bar, where the girls going on about ‘shots per text.’ But I do remember, looking at one of the guys who played in the band, whilst I was on the dance floor, because I was sure that I knew him from somewhere, but couldn’t figure out where?

However, I do love that you sent me that message, as that took a great deal of Goolies….and it’s romantic, it’s sweet. Now, I don’t know whether you read the blog or not? But if you are reading this today…whizz me another email…and we can absolutely go for a drink…  a ‘friendly’ as I like to call them. That took loads of balls, and probably a few drinks…and even though I can’t remember the moment…I do actually appreciate your message.

Then as all girls do….the ‘morning after’ group ‘Whatsapp’ was going mental.

First Mel thanked ‘Fairytale’ for inviting her…After moderately bollocking me for ‘sloping off’ without saying bye. ( I love sloping off.) We all told ‘Fairytale’ how great she was and hoped she had a lovely time….Then I plonked in the above email….

…and it all went down hill from there?

‘Who was that?’

Me: ‘I don’t know? I fell in love and didn’t even realise?’

Hustle: ‘I can actually remember most of my night for a change.’

(I had stated that night, that it hasn’t started until ‘Hustle’ has skidded across the floor on her arse.) 

‘It was good. I have no beer fear! Lol’

Fairytale: ‘I’m sweating worse than an otters pocket.. and I can’t stop thinking about your bum hole Chrissie.’

Hustle: ‘Chrissie’s bum hole? What did I miss?’

Me: ‘Was I not in the same place as everyone last night? I don’t remember falling in love or my bum hole?’

Fairytale: ‘I’ll say one word…Jonny.’

(Jonny is Fairytale’s boyfriend.) 

Me: ‘Jonny, did me up the bum? This just gets worse…’

Double B: ‘Hahaha, I honestly have no idea what’s going on here?’

Fairytale: ‘Jonny pinched my phone…Lol’

Me: ‘It’s too early for this shit…What is going on???’

Then I got saved, because as soon as I placed my phone down on my bed side table, it *pinged* again….

(Whatsapp…Other friends….)

Kate: ‘SO!!! No date happened last night. Lol. BUT I ended up having a date with a different guy in the end by accident!!

Me: ‘Omg! As If. I need to know everything…’

Kate: ‘Lol…What you up too? Meet you at The Carelton in 10…?

What Chu’ Know ‘Bout Me…..???

Morning! Morning! Morning! It’s really busy times in Wunna Land and everything is going delightfully. I’m really happy. Things are great. Yeah…I lost my flipping purse and bank cards…But they’re all cancelled off, new ones are headed my way and just like that….life went back to normal. (Even though my Mum did have to take the children and I out to dinner, because I had no access to funds. 🙂 ) We Pizza Expressed it and I had actually forgot how great the food is there. I only got the Caesar Salad, however it was remarkable! I could have it everyday!

BUT NOT WITHOUT A BANK CARD!

Yippppppeeeee!

Yes! I’m in a great mood. I’m tinkered over in a magical swirl of happiness. I still feel like the luckiest girl alive….and today, my cheeky little swines…You have a…

‘WHAT CHU’ KNOW BOUT ME’ BLOG!

(I do the ‘What Chu’ Know’ blog every so often, when things are a little too busy with work….You inbox me questions…I give you my honest answers…You get to know me better, (maybe on a more personal level…) and we all slip on our stilettos and sing nursery rhymes, to the beat of utter happiness.

You cool? Get it?

Cue SONG:

What is your real name?

Christina Wunna. People are always shocked that my name is actually ‘Christina’ and I have no clue why?

What part of Asian are you from?

I was born in Yorkshire, but both of my parents are Burmese. Making me 100 percent Burmese through blood.

Have you ever got with a girl?

I’ve kissed a girl…Haven’t we all…and maybe messed around with one, once…..back in my Hollywood days….Yet only because I had a weird ‘swinger’ boyfriend. I actually didn’t enjoy it….But being young, I sort of just experimented with the whole thing…for him. I wouldn’t do that now…. I’m far too sassy…. I know what I want….Yet, I don’t judge people on their sexual preferences….Ours just didn’t match…. Lol.

Did you actually go to Private school?

Yeah I did. Hard to believe I know…Lol I went to Hill House in Doncaster, then Ackworth School in Pontefract. I have Doctor parents, so I ended up there. However, both my children actually go to that school there now. Which is lovely.

Weren’t you scared moving to Hollywood when you were young?

No. I was so excited. I wasn’t even scared of the bad things that happen in Hollywood. As soon as I got into my taxi at LAX, after literally just arriving, the taxi driver turned around and said, ‘I’ll give you $100 for a blow job.’ I just looked at him, laughed, said, ‘Don’t be a dick…no’ and he drove me safely to my hotel, without uttering another word. He was more terrified of me. I hate ‘ugly’ humans. Good try. But you lose.

Would you let your daughter be a glamour model? 

Not at all. 🙂 One rule for me….One rule for her… Lol

Would you ever get married again?

Yes. Fourth time lucky. I’ll get it right this time around. I’m just a slow learner when it comes to love. I wear my heart on my sleeve…and it’s shit. Lol

How long have you been single for?

I don’t know….? I don’t really count the minutes, seconds and years of ‘single’ or ‘together‘ life….I just get on with it…

What is you favourite cocktail?

Too vague a question. I love all cocktails. I can literally drink ANYTHING. So it depends on my mood. But I’m a creature of habit, so when I’m hungover, I will find a Bloody Mary. Or at Ego, I’ll always order a ‘Salted Rimmed Margarita,’ When I’m Ginos…I’ll always have an Espresso Martini….When I’m at Tattu i’ll always order the ‘Skull Candy.’ That’s just the way it goes…I attached drinks to memories…They remind me of men, friends or past dates….

Are you completely different to how you were in your 20’s?

Yeah, I’m completely different. You are or will be too. In my 20’s. I loved the 20 year old version of me. I didn’t care what anyone thought. I just LIVED FREELY AND HAPPILY. I was a wild one….I’m not as WILD now…I’m cheeky, but balanced. I just love fun…It’s in my soul…

What do you hate about yourself he most?

Such a nice question? Lol. I hate my wonky bottom tooth, which I never seem to get fixed and I hate that I can’t ever conquer my love life….It’s like i’m on a slow moving merry go around, just doing the same thing over and over again….without learning…

Saw that you just watched Fifty Shades Darker….When it comes to sex, or you Submissive or Dominant, and also when it comes to your regular personality?

I’m sassy. I’m both. Well, I can ‘play’ both. and get off on both. I love to ‘play’ in the bedroom. I’m naughty but fun. It’s good clean filth. Lol. I’m just feel really confident in the bedroom. Yet, I’m not remotely promiscuous. Loyalty is HUGE TO ME. I wouldn’t like to sleep with lots of different people….When you’re in your 30s, you can’t be arsed with the ‘no hopers.’ I have a one track mind and heart…So when I love someone, I love them madly. But only them…

Personality wise…I’m dominant. Really dominant. I’m a ‘Diva. I might play or try and be submissive at times….But I’m not….By nature….I’m bossy. I know what I want…and hate not getting what I want. 🙂

Your pics are getting hotter and hotter, do you feel under pressure now that your 37 to look good?

Yes! All the time. It’s stressy. Lol. I have a shoot coming up in a couple weeks in swimwear and looking good for that, has sent me moderately bonkers. But I am vain by nature. I don’t find it a chore to primp. I actually love it.

What are your thoughts on long distance romantic relationships? 

I’m fine with long distance relationships. I’m actually really used to them. Most of the guys that i’ve dated have had busy careers, that take them away a lot and my career too, is quite busy…so It’s kinda just the norm. Plus, romantically, i don’t think geography is an issue when you truly love someone…You’d still make it work….if you could be arsed to, or if it was meant to be…

Will you marry me?

Where’s the rock?

Will you marry me…have more kids, cook…clean and be my bed slave, then take me to male chauvinism classes??

No. Simples. Lol

Dinner, what are we eating, where and when?

Lol. Everyone wants to feed me…. I get this question almost 4 times a day, by strangers…

Can I be your slave…?

Noooooo. I’m not a Dom. I don’t get off on humiliating strange men. I once had a guy follow me around G.A.Y in London, begging to be my slave…He literally wouldn’t go away and kept doing everything I told him too…It was so dull….It couldn’t have annoyed me more! My friends were pissing themselves because they said, ‘You’re the only person I know, to go to the bar and come back with a slave.’ 

Can I spoil you?

No. I hate it when guys say that. Surely real men just spoil you anyway, without having to ask because they want to. If you have to ask a girl that, it means you will never ever do it. I buy my own things. 🙂

You said you’re back on the tv soon, which show?

Can’t tell you…

Being Asian/Oriental did you find it hard breaking into the glamour modelling industry?

No. I started out in LA and out there, you’re actually at an advantage, because everyone is blond, tanned and beautiful, or brunette tanned and ‘girl next door,‘ meaning they have it a lot tougher, because there’s so much competition. ‘Types’ (as in being ‘asian’) work ALL THE TIME, because there’s really just a handful of you in the entire city and they have to put you in the magazine. Lol.

Do you reckon you’ve met the man of your dreams…?

There is definitely someone who I really fancy right now. In fact, more than fancy….

Do you think you’re a good or bad role model for girls?

I’m not trying to be role model. I just write the diary of my life….The good bits and the bad bits….Sometimes i’m preachy and ‘role model’ like, other times i’m a swine. But that’s what makes me real. That’s what makes me human.

Do you make up the stories on your blog?

Noooooo. Not one piece of it is fabricated. Absolutely every single little bit has truthfully happened….to the point where I even MISS things out, because they’re too inappropriate, or because I don’t want anyone to know. All the people are real…They’ve just been given ‘nicknames’ because then they still have their own sense of privacy, yet can enjoy reading and reliving their piece of the blog without you knowing, who they are.

Over the years, are some of the ‘characters’ you’ve labelled with ‘other names’ and wrote about famous?

Oh God yeah….A lot more than you think.

How do you think your blog has become successful?

Word of mouth. It’s like Chinese Whispers…Someone tells someone, who tells someone else….I’ve met a lot of people in my time…So I guess, a lot of people have accidentally read the blog and just told someone else about it….It’s like a cheeky discovery.

What the most important thing to you?

Ruby & Junior. I don’t value anything more than their journey through life…..I’m a soft mum, so they literally walk all over me….

Love or Money?

Both. I like balance. Lol.

If i were to meet you in person, would I be shocked?

No. ‘Shocked’ isn’t the right word? You might feel awkward at first, But everyone feels a little bit weird, until the first five minutes of ‘pleasantries’ are over…I am SUPER DOOPER GOOD WITH PEOPLE.

Would you have another child?

Yes. I’d have one more…Yet, It’s not something that I NEED to do, as I already have Ruby & Junior. I have my hands kinda full, as a lone parent. So, if I knew that the guy was gonna stick around and we were a whole family and utterly committed…Then ofcourse…yeah. I’m sure parenting is much easier with two of you.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Mums Night, Wine & Get Me Stepping…

 

Image may contain: 1 person, close-up

How beautiful is the weather today!!! It’s gorgeous! The suns out, I’m feeling a glimpse of Springtime and well Life just feels dandier, doesn’t it, when we are treated to a jolly bit of ‘shine.’

In fact, i’m kinda glad it was sunny, because I bumped into Keiran (Juniors Dad) during the school run this morning. He was dropping Junior off and for some reason today (it’s his birthday today, but he’s a Jehovahs Witness now and therefore doesn’t celebrate it anymore.. I just didn’t mention birthday anything.)

But he just needed to talk to me today. Not even about anything….He just wanted to chat, talk life, the kids and weirdly reminisce in a carpark…as I waved at other mums.

Keiran: ‘Junior said that you’d been crying. Are you okay?’

Me: ‘When? I’m completely fine. He totally made that up. I haven’t cried at all. Anyway, i’ve got to go..’

Keiran: ‘No..wait….’

I don’t know? I think he must’ve just missed me today, or felt a bit lonely. However, even though i’m happy that we ‘co parent’ Junior, the best way we know how…To me…he’s my EX husband..and it’s done. Years and years ago, there were so many opportunities where he could’ve made it right…but he couldn’t be arsed to.

Luckily that was just how life was supposed to play out for me….

Years flew by, I loved being a single mum, I felt the happiest I had ever been…My career went from strength to strength..and NEVER in a million, trillion, gzillion, years… even if it was drenched in wine and came with kittens, cold hard cash, with a cherry on top, would I ever even consider getting back with Keiran.

It’s done. I like that we only ‘co parent’ now. But I’m polite…So I took in the sunshine and chatted for 30 minutes before zooming off…

I’m in a good mood today. Yesterday ended up being fabulous. I bumped into my friends Kate and Hairdresser Claire. It was kinda did that I did, because they had wine and I had managed to accidentally get myself wedged into a funeral party.

Don’t ask.

I just sorted of looked up all ‘dolly eyed‘ and found a funeral around by accident…

20 minutes later…Kate & Hairdresser Claire rock up and sweep me to one side, as they contemplated the ‘Hunters Chicken.’

Me: ‘I’m off to Spain soon and I have to look good in a flipping bikini.’

Kate: ‘You always post selfies in no clothes…You already look good.’

Me: ‘No. I mean I have to look really good.’

Claire: ‘Well you’re doing really well with that Peroni in front of you. Lol.’

Then we chatted about glamourously trashing hotels, how Claire should’ve been my ‘in Spain’ hairdresser, how all parties should have tattooists and how Kate still needs cigs even though she’s vaping. Lol

I learnt a bit more about Kate yesterday. I learnt that under her tough sassy banter…She is VERY MUCH a girl.. (I’m the same way. That’s why I could spot it.)

Then we talked about stalking people and ran off to do school runs…

I love being a girl.

Rushing, gathering children, sushi and madness occurred then. Yet, I still felt like the happiest human in the world? I just got on with it and loved it.

I was excited yesterday because that evening, a group of Mum’s (our children are all in the same class at school,) I think there were about 10 of us? (I’m shit at counting. It takes too long.) Anyway, we had all arranged to meet at Ego for 7.30pm for dinner and a couple drinks.

I LOVE MEETING NEW PEOPLE. I’m highly social. I find it fun. And like I said, we see each other daily, yet just in passing, with a child in tow or a dash to work sprint on…We’ve always made ‘pleasantries’ but we’ve never really created an opportunity to get to know one another.

Rupert’s Mum did last night…and with what felt like a single *Blink* ….Day had now turned to Night, it was around 7.11pm…and I found myself with ‘Miss Murphy’ squatted down, outside Ego rummaging through handbags like savages, to see if we could AT ALL, in ALL OF THE  ENTIRE LAND… find a lighter. Lol.

YOU CAN NEVER FIND ONE WHEN YOU ACTUALLY NEED ONE.

‘Can you find yours?’

‘No.’

‘Wait, I think I have one in the car…’

‘No…Hang on…i’ve found one…’

Plus, I ruined her phone conversation too…even though she very politely told me I didn’t.

It was already a fun night and it hadn’t even begun…

Unfortunately for me, I thought I was early, but by the time i walked in…everyone was already there, sat comfortably, with drinks….. waiting!

Me: ‘Oh! Sorry! I thought I was early. Lol’

Miss.Murphy: ‘Have you all been waiting a really long time?

‘Nooooo….’

Miss. Murphy: ‘So, you have then…Lol.’

We were all shown to our table and just like that, these ladies who I see every single day, yet never really find chance to speak to, all did dinner and that means a lot because we’re all busy women, some career women, some who dash around holding the family together. We’re all ages, all sorts, all types, from all different walks of lives.

Our children go to a nearby Private school (infact the school I went to as a child) and well, there’s only 10 children in their entire year…Meaning our kids are gonna grow up to be really close….So we might as well have white wine spritzers and get to know one another…As we have YEARS of our babies growing…

It was such fun, yet civilized, evening and great banter, chitter chatter, laid back life talk and a great night of just opening up and letting other ladies, at the table peek into YOUR life a bit more…because it’s always ‘steady’ at first, isn’t it?

Karen: ‘Do your kids do any out of school activites…’

Me: ‘No. Ruby asked if she could join Brownies and I just said *NO* lol.’

Miss.Murphy: ‘They eat out a lot…. That’s what they do. Lol.  I said No to Beavers.

There were talks about work, bald pigs, camper vans, wood worm, beavers, money, horses, great places to dine, ice skating, boat hotels, botox, boarding school and late teas…

(Unless you have a child in the school, you will not understand the JOY of the schools ‘Late tea’.)

Me: ‘By the time they’re get to the first year of Senior school, they’ll all be boarders, even though we all only live up the road. Lol.’

We’re all really lucky! And our babies are really lucky. We’re all really different. But a great set of mums!

I like a group of successful women. It makes me smile. So it was actually wonderful to sit, banter and sip white wine spritzers with them…

It was actually a breath of fresh air. Everyone was really honest. Everyone laughed. Some were loud. Some were quiet. Other’s wished for more wine and as I scanned the table, I was really happy that we all, for a moment, valued each other enough to take the time to do dinner. ( I mean, today I have a stack of work to get through. Another Mum has three different teas to arrange. Another Mum has a flight to catch for work this morning..) 

Yet, we made it to dinner… (Probably because we knew there was wine.)

I can’t wait to do it again….

Great night!

I’ve got to dash because i’m doing my Sport Relief steps today throughout work, and i’ve been sat on my arse for the last 30 minutes…instead of stepping. (You need to Download the Sport Relief App today and start having each step you take count towards the nations ‘Billion Step ‘Challenge,’ to help change lives. Joe Wicks is doing it. Davina’s doing it. Man U are doing…Everyone’s doing it. I’ve only taken 712 steps today. Lol.

Godda Go! Godda Go! I’ve got to arrange my flights and bikinis for Spain. (Business…Not just pleasure.)

Lots of love,

Chrissie (I always look moody on my ‘no clothes’ pics.)

Image may contain: 1 person, close-up

 

 

When guys are like…………

Image may contain: 1 person, close-up

I’m in such a GOOD MOOD today!!! I’m like a juicy little bubble berried  with excitement. You could just *squeeze* me and I’d *POP* confetti, with *squeaks* of laughter and shrieks and ‘ooh laa.‘ Then champagne showers would simply start roaring out of nowhere, as let’s face it it’s Wunna Land. Glasses would be poured.  ‘Handsomes‘ would be winking…. and I would just strut forward, knowing that my version of life just seems to be getting better!

To be fair, after that really shit 2013…or was it 2014? I’ve blanked out deliberately. Lol. One of those years was SHOCKING. After that point…MY LIFE, just changed and I became the luckiest chick ever.

Then at the beginning of 2017 my mentality changed…new people entered Wunna Land. I became closer to people who I never knew I would be so close to….Then my life changed again…and Right now,because I whopped out that sassy Wunna ‘Gusto’ and decided to just  do the things that made me happy, without fear…2018 has ended up (so far) being one of the best years of my life….

YIPPPPPPPPeeeeeeeeEEEEEEEE!

I’m in the most wonderful mood, for no real reason and it’s fantastic because I feel ALIVE! I’m ‘happy go lucky’ by nature. I’m the frill in ya twisters. The *pop* of that champers spray. I’m giddy…I’m great. I’m like a little girl, that’s filled with charm….I’m celebrating life and no one can stop me. And the most wonderous thing about my Tuesday, is the simple the fact that today…I have NO PRESSURE! I’m freeeeeeeeeeee!

So, I’m feeling like a Winner! ( Chicken! Chicken! Dinner!)

To me ‘balance’ is one of the most important things that I measure when it comes to success. (I nearly typed ‘ ‘when it comes to sex‘ then. Lol. How ‘Cougar‘ of me. I can’t wait until my ‘Cougar’ days kick in. I CAN REALLY. I’D HATE IT. After financially and emotionally looking after every single man in the entire world, that Cupid has FORCED me to date…or Life has MADE me cross paths with….A little lost boy, with no job, is not gonna make my wish list. Ever. And I don’t even care. Lol. I can like what or who I want….

At this point in my life, I very much want to be taken care of emotionally, mentally, physically and by a grown up man that I don’t have to pay for. That’s always good, isn’t it! And i’ve noticed that the more successful I’ve become, the more ‘lost little boys, with no job‘ come a knocking.

‘Meal tickets are the other way…Nope…No…Wait…Turn around…A bit to the left…Oh yeah and keep on walking darling…Don’t look back now, you cheeky little thing. Wunna land’s door is FUCKING SLAMMED….beautifully shut. 😉  Oh the kids are swearing at you, from the rosy tinted windows.’

What has happened to men?

I mean, the ‘Little Lost Boy’ aside….It doesn’t take much to value your girl, guy, wife, partner or fancy piece and treat her with both respect…AND like a Princess! 😉

ITS NOT THAT HARD!

I mean my guy friend, the other day was moaning about how  we chicks are all ‘trying to be independent’ now….(He took a chick out on a date, made her pay for THEIR meal and then ‘boned’ her in the back of a car.)

Romance is alive….Shakespeare couldn’t have written it better himself.

We girls have always been independent. Not only have some of us wanted to be. But we’ve also HAD to be.

I’m adventurous and fun by nature. I moved to LA by myself as a kid to chase dreams. That’s my ‘WANTING to be’ independent streak. But my ‘HAVING to be‘ independent streak is still utterly alive, because i’m a lone parent of two little babies…I’m Mum, I’m Dad, I’m Love, I’m Money. I’m everything!

At first that wasn’t by choice. Yet now….It’s great and it’s made me feel powerful… and if I love anything, I love feeling powerful. Lol.

It’s a turn on. (Sick I know.) But I go for that in guys also? I have no clue why, other than sickness? However, yes, I’m totally turned on by it….BUT ONLY IF THEY HAVE A BEAUTIFUL SOUL AND RESEMBLE A DELICIOUS PIECE OF EYE CANDY. 🙂 (Meaning not some big grizzle, ancient years older than me, evil pervert, with 22 beer bellies and a boner.)

I like a well rounded, fun, loyal, loving man. The ‘power’ things is only a sexual turn on. I don’t want you to get it twisted. Lol. It’s not an essential trait that they need. Lol. In the bedroom…I’d find that REALLY SEXY. But like I said, they have to be of the ‘handsome’ variety…You can call me ‘shallow’ for that….and…well..I won’t care. Lol. It’s what I fancy.

Everyone loves eye candy. Some people just like to look at eye candy. I like to find eye candy, with an amazing personality, that would make a good hubbster …and just make him MINE. 🙂

Italiano: (My LA Friend..) ‘She pretty much grew up in Hollywood around a bunch of guys. We were all roomates. Models, actors, lawyers, agents… But it was definitely ALL guys and Chrissie…So she kinda picked up a Hollywood dudes mentality when it comes to dating… And it’s fucking awesome. She was the best roomie I ever had!’

(We all just had so much fun. I cannot even begin to TELL you the stories. But they’re scattered throughout my blog… through the years….I loved that at 20, we could just show up to an audition, do really bad at it and then simply say ‘Fuck it’ go to The Standard, order 4 poolside strawberry margaritas and make ourselves feel better, before our next audition.)

I’ve gone on a flipping tangent!

What was I even on about? Balance? Or things I like i guys? I forgot about it all, because I was too busy *bobbing* away with cocktails at ‘The Standard.’

When it comes to men…their spirit needs to play well with mine. I want them to be my best friend. They have to be a family man. I have kids. They are part of my package. I love a laugh. I love a thoughtful person. I love sexy. I LOVE SEXY. Smart. Vain. I love ‘good times.’ But I love to chill and even if I fancy treating myself to utter glamour pussy, dressed ‘to the nines’ luxury, (which I adore,) I also love to just slum it and banter in my comfies…with a takeout.

When it comes to ‘balance’ true success to me, is when someone has everything…Happiness, health, wealth, a career they love, their dream partner, maybe even a family…and it’s all easy and all beautiful.

When I see a man who has that…I see him as ‘Successful.’

(I mean, what’s the point at winning at ONE thing, if during that time, you managed to lose everything else….?)

I learnt that early on in life in LA, when I was about 23. It was a very hard ‘learn.’ Hahaha. I cried a lot for a while…then cried over useless wilies….;)

Throwback convo….Do it in your best American accent….

Christine: ‘What the fuck is up with her…?’

Theo: ‘It’s fine, leave it. She’s crying over a penis…’

I can’t be bothered to write anymore…I need an afternoon tipple…Or an adventure with friends! I met my good friend ‘House of Solo’ Magazines, ‘Big A’ yesterday. He’s on a diet and with an orange juice, showed me all the people he was booking for the front cover of his magazine. This was at Ego…(which is like my local bar.)

BUT…

I’m excited, because I’m actually at Ego this evening for dinner and drinks, with all the Mum’s of Ruby’s class/year…whatever you want to call it. It’s great because we’ve never really hung out with each other before. We only ever see one another in passing…So, it will be really lovely, to just sit down, eat, drink and be merry, and get to know some faces that I pretty much see everyday!

That’s tonight!

Kisses,

Chrissie. x

 

Let’s Not Judge & Bubblegum Bed Spreads

Image may contain: 1 person, text

I’ve slept on Bubblegums, so bare with me….Not sure what’s exactly happened, but my kids managed to place small round multi coloured bubble gum balls, under my flat sheet….? It was like ‘The Princess  The Pea’ but much much shitter and not very royal. Swearing happened. I mean before I had to film yesterday afternoon, I took the children to go watch ‘Peter Rabbit’ at the cinema yesterday morning….(I like to be away from the crowd) and Ruby complained because he VIP Box Seat wasn’t a bed???? What am I raising? Junior’s cool. Ruby is SO high maintenance that even i’m cringing.

It’s weird how we label people right? And even though we always state that we are hardly ever judgmental, by any means….We still judge…don’t we? And we shouldn’t. But it’s just life….innit.

If you know me personally, you’ll know that I’m probably one of the most easy going chicks around. I’m easy breezy, laid back and yeah I’ll strop when I’m hormonally imbalanced, or feel something with a ‘fire’ in my soul…I can be a ‘Diva.’ Yet, 90 percent of the time…I’m cool. I’m swag. Like you’ve got to be a proper TWAT for me to dislike you.

Image may contain: 1 person, sunglasses and text Image may contain: one or more people and text

Recently, I’ve been really busy with work and i’m really happy about that because it’s all I’ve ever wanted. I feel really lucky and i’m counting every single ONE of my sassy little blessings. I’ve worked really hard and it feels good to look back and kinda notice achievement. It sends a buzz through me. Almost like a love buzz. I am in a VERY NEW CHAPTER. It did start earlier, towards the end of last year, with work…HOWEVER, it takes time for change to sink in…and now I can feel this CHAPTER and it is BRIMMING with excitement.

However, on Monday….was it Monday? No….Wednesday. NO wait. It was flipping THURSDAY. Lol. On Thursday, I’d stopped off for a quick ‘boozy’ treat at one of my locals. Kate and Claire had rocked up with wine in their hands, so naturally, they parked themselves at a table that had a ‘Wunna’ parked upon it and we had THE BEST BANTER OF A NATTER EVER. It was wonderful and I really felt ALIVE.

Wine was poured, laughter was out loud and we just talked shit for HOURS. We talked guys, sex, girls, diets and life….We had this discussion on how important it was for women to still feel feminine as they got older. How we should always still have ‘girl’ fun and be treated well by gents and even though we can be feisty, most of the time we’re submissive…as men are the more selfish sex. The best girls are independant and work their own sense of self. Like i’ll still be doing my face at 80 and thinking i’m ‘da bomb.’ 😉

It was such a great afternoon, that we didn’t ever want it to stop. If we didn’t have responsibilities…(The shit thing about being 30 something) it would’ve gone on FOREVER. I would’ve turned 90 and died of laughter at that table, dripped in vino.

But Claire and I have actually known each other for years…in passing. Everyday she walked passed me. Everyday I walked passed. Everyday we said nothing to each other.

Kate: ‘Yeah, she was really shocked when she hung out with you the other day..as she had such a laugh, and didn’t think you were like that…She said she used to see you all the time, but thought you’d never speak to her…’

Claire: ‘WHAT I SAID was, that I used to look at Chrissie, tottering up all glam in her heels and hair and looking all sexy and just thought, she’ll just look at me and think….’

Me: ‘I used to look at you and think that I better not say anything because she’ll just think i’m some kind of bimbo.’

(Claire’s all tattooed, edgy and cool looking….I just thought she wouldn’t be arsed with someone like me…) 

She was saying that just because she has tattoos people often think she’s EVIL, or worships the Devil…And I was saying that everyone already seems to have an opinion of me…Yet from an Oriental girl point of view, if I just randomly find myself stood next to a guy, or an old man at a bar….People will automatically think we’re dating, that i’m a ‘Thai Bride’ or I need a visa. Lol.

Kate: ‘She’s from Doncaster.’

Anyway, The funniest thing was, that on THURSDAY we found out that we were really similar and that we actually got along really really well. So, I’m utterly happy that I sat down on Thursday afternoon, for my ‘boozy treat’ and the rocked up with their bottle of vino.

I’m social by nature. I’m chatty. I’m easy to get along with. But we’re sometimes scared to say ‘Hi’ to new people, right? Or too scared to learn about the new people, that have entered our newest chapter….

We shouldn’t always be…(and I am often cautious because within seconds…and  if i’m too friendly… a semi circle of utter testosterone floods my path of glamour and before you know it they’re talking at me, with ‘wild’ in their eyes and a boners that suggest a distinct lack of control. Lol) 

So, the message of the day is to refrain from labeling others….then making a judgement based upon that label. We chose our own versions of life, our own jobs, paths, our own looks and our own way to success, love and family….

That what makes us humans ACE.

ps/ I’m flipping over this snow. I keep watching everyone’s Instagram Stories and is everyone in the world just in Dubai right now? Or are holiday’s there on the cheap? It’s pool party this, swimwear brunch that…

PLEASE LORD GIVE ME SUN.