How many days has it been? I don’t even know? It’s felt like forever…(let me just check…)
No, it’s fine. Monday was my last post. We’re all good. Well, I assume it was Monday, since it starts ‘Happy Monday,’ but let’s face it, you never know with me.
SO MUCH IS GOING ON…IT IS SUCH A BUSY TIME FOR ME.
I did throw a pity party yesterday. I did well and took it out on my best chick ‘Firmonnell.’
‘It’s your job now.’
‘I know but…I’m throwing a pity party, just go with it… I feel like a thing and not a human…’
‘You ARE human, in fact you’re the best human I know.’
(I can’t stop adoring ‘Firmonnell.’ She’s someone that no matter what’s going on in her life, she’ll always make you feel better. I’m a bit like that…Yet only she notices it.)
Then I threw a moderate ‘almost’ strop on whatsapp last night, (i’m a feisty one and I like that about me,) but I felt it in my soul and then swallowed my glitzy pride. I chilled on it a second, with my non diet wine..and even though I wanted to EXPLODE….I 37 year old stopped myself. 🙂
This morning I looked down at my phone and read…
‘How’s the diva doing today?x’
‘I nearly went ‘drag queen’ ape on you..’
‘U little shit…What are u doing?’
I’ve committed to both labels...’diva’ and ‘shit’ ..so yeah, just like that…. I’m altogether fine now.
(They say ‘i’m fine’ is the biggest lie all humans tell every single minute of every single day. I could’ve just made that up…)
I’ve just been asked to fly to Paris, but I can’t go because my work load is intense. I’m about to start my health kick and i’m not going to find the ‘health kick’ part hard…I’m doing to find the ‘dealing with the life stress’ bit hard…and i’m gonna miss my giant cocktail slurps.
I had so much to tell you, but i have no clue where to start or what to say now, which isn’t very handy when you’re a blogger.
I’ve danced in my undies in fitting rooms. (I stated on Facebook that I wanted to see your fitting room frolics. I did mean the girls, and all in the aid of empowerment. But only boys responded… Lol….At least I didn’t get any dick pics. I actually and quite thankfully haven’t received any in ages…THAT DOESN’T MEAN I WANT ANY. Here’s a wacky concept, save them for your wives!
(All I can currently smell around me is roast dinners. Stop eating roast dinners around me. I’m about to start my diet. The middle aged lady at the opposite table needs to watch herself because I might eat HER and her dinner.)
But where was I? I danced in fitting rooms. (GIRLS SEND ME YOUR ‘FITTING ROOM’ SELFIES.) I’ve worked, worked, worked, worked and worked. I had to wake up at 3am this morning to ‘online post’ stuff, to hit the time zones. (See! Told you the graft was that easy.) I forgot to schedule a post…So I had to do it manually..I shocked myself up at 2.30am and remembered. I also blind hand patted around in the dark for wine, but couldn’t find any. I’m that much of a loser.
Ruby and I had ‘mummy night’ last night, (Junior was at Keiran’s, his Dad,) so she slept in my bed and does every Mummy night,’ as ofcourse, as always….there’s just me in it.
She must’ve been having the weirdest 2.30am dream, because still asleep she burst into a fit of mad laughter and then shouted…
‘I HAVEN’T WEE’D MYSELF.’
Lord help me through BOTH OF THEIR teenage years. Rubes is like me, so she’s ll be fun, but fine. She’ll just cry over boys all the time. Junior is such a lad, which will be a nightmare. He is the product of two ‘wild ones.’ Only last weekend, the WONDERFUL security at The Frenchgate Centre, in Doncaster, prevented him from trying to wander off and do his own thing. They had to drag him back to Waterstones…because he was sure there was something more exciting happening around the corner.
Keiran might be a Jehovah’s Witness now, yet when I met him YEARS AND YEARS AGO, he was certainly an Ibiza party boy. (He’ll hate me putting that…But whatever…It’s the truth. 🙂 And there’s no shame in anyone’s game of story. I ain’t hating on you boy! We’re co parent an awesome son.)
But anyway…There I was on March 7th, 2018…2.30am in the morning…in Yorkshire…
I sat up, naked, in the dark, with ‘Rocco’ my kitten and I posted this…
Nothing is better to ME than ‘FILTHY SENTIMENTS.’ You should all know this, as I harp on about them all the time. I love how open, naughty, outspoken and fun the brand is! (With a classy twist. Like this isn’t some ‘run of the mill‘ cheapo brand. It’s so styled, so well run and each piece of ‘filth‘ is absolutely divine.)
Anyway, incase you didn’t know…I am now the PROUD OWNER of my very own bespoke ‘Filthy Sentiments’ mug…from their new neon range…
AND I F****** LOVE IT.
Yesterday, ‘Filthy Sentiments’ turned over their FIRST MILLION in sales. They’ve only been in business 3 years…and that IS HUGE, to say they specialize in ‘filthy’ gift cards, mugs, note books, pens and now pj’s. That’s not easy!
So, here I am celebrating with ‘Filthy’ because, if anything I want you to be inspired. That took a great deal of hard work. And with fun brands people don’t think that ‘hard work’ happens, because they just see the ‘fun.’
Someone somewhere, came up with an idea, probably over a drink and BOOM….a million pound later…it worked….and it’s only just the beginning.
That is what I’m celebrating!
(And I loved it because on my Insta & Facebook post this morning, I could swear like a pirate on my post.)
Get you bit of FILTH NOW!
OH NO…THE PLACE WHERE I’M BLOGGING IS NOW PLAYING SAD LOVE SONGS…I’m too emosh. It’s reminding me of ‘Dancing on Ice.’
Right now, I have a friend away filming a reality show. Lisa (as in Appleton) was also just on Jeremy Kyle with Lauren Harries this morning. My new school/old school diet and work out matey ‘Kate’ reminded me this morning. I missed it. But i’ll see it on catch up.
I love it when Lisa gets feisty.
All girls are hot when they’re feisty.
It’s important that you always stand up for what you believe is right, even when you might be moderately terrified to do so. Make sure, you’re being treated the way you want to be treated. Make sure, you are always staying LOYAL to what you believe in.
The people that give a shit, will stand by you, understand you and love you madly anyway…
Thank you for following my life…