Fairytales, A Bit Of Luck & a Very ‘Happy Ending?’ ;)

Image may contain: one or more people and people sitting

I don’t even know what’s happening right now? I’m literally the luckiest little tinker in all of the world. I’m jammy. I’m a shit. But i’m really enjoying my little version of life and mainly because right now, I’m doing everything I love, everything I WANT to do and now no longer HAVING to do.

You’ll already also know, (because I shoved it all over my ‘socials,’ that I found part of my Spanish get away in the foreign press a few days ago…which made me smile. I shot a lot, so to see me headline, a little something, in a different land, made all the picture taking worthwhile.

Image may contain: 2 people, people smiling, text

Image may contain: text

I like making foreign press, as with the blog being read all over the world, (which i’m grateful for)…I’m gonna be honest, all press or ‘look at me‘ around the globe… is pretty helpful. Having the blog is great for spreading Wunna Land news around the world…as is being a model….You travel a lot.

It honestly helps a great deal. The phone starts ringing so much, you start making up a dance routine to your ring tone….

But anyway….

I had a WUNNAFUL Thursday…Well….I think it was Thursday? Whatever day it was last week….We’re gonna fly with Thursday….

WUNNA LAND WENT MENTAL.

It was sort of good news, after good news, after great news phone calls, after really fucking phenomenal emails. Lol. Everything, I had been worrying about, turned out roses. Everything that I didn’t even know would happen…ended up being presented to me as a lucky opportunity….and being the high strung executive that I am.. ;)….I simply did what any professional would do…and that was…

JUMP UP AND DOWN MADLY ON A STOOL, IN THE MIDDLE OF MY LIVING ROOM, SCREAMING WEIRD SHIT LIKE *YIPPPEEE* & *WOO* AS I LET THAT RUSH OF A WUNNA LAND BUZZ RADIATE FROM ME.

I was so giddy I could’ve giggled up martini’s and done *can can* kicks in a conga line..(and I hate conga lines, Iย  always feelย  that they degrade people. Lol) You lose ALL SWIGEDDY SWAG in a conga line, just so you know. And it’s actually not the fun jiggly part, that makes you look like a lunatic It’s the part where in which the line…. drizzles off, into nothingness and no one knows what to do, other than look lost and act like it never even happened?? It’s a similar awkwardness to that of a dodgy one night stand.

It’s that part that solidifies it’s stamp of utter degradation. ๐Ÿ™‚

But yeah, I don’t even know what’s going on? I’m just riding the beginners wave and enjoying it with love, my fingers crossed and excitement! And the reason why i’m so happy about the weird consecutive ‘good news’ thing, is because my life NEVER pans out this way. I USUALLY have TO FIGHT for a ‘good news’ result.

Now, it’s served up to me, with cocktail umbrellas and nipple tassles on. I can’t really believe? It’s weird because in life, I do feel as though i’ve done well. I’ve achieved. And my dreams have come true.

Yet, i kinda set all these other goals and dreams, each time I accomplish a ‘tick box’

Friend: ‘You’re actually going to do it Wunna!!!’

…and right now, it’s crazy, because it feels like i’m doing it again? And because i’ve worked so hard for it…It feels doubley great! You just feel so much more satisfied. I can’t even believe it. My life is changing again!

I feel like the luckiest girl alive…

..in work… ๐Ÿ™‚ because we always know that my love life pretty much insists on being disobedient, as it refuses to dance up a happy ending.ย  Well, not the right kind of ‘happy ending.’ ๐Ÿ™‚

(Sorry, i’m having a giggle to myself, because the last time someone, well lets say ‘happy endinged‘ on my back, or was it on my bum? I couldn’t see, I don’t know? Lol….The sentence they said, immediately after, as they did the loving tissue ‘wipe up’ was…)

‘HOW YOU DOIN’

Yes…in a ‘Joey‘ from ‘Friends‘ voice. Love it! Hilarious! (You know who you are! Lol)ย I actually messaged them yesterday to ‘check in‘ and see how Saturday had been to them? I think I annoy this human. But i’m rubbish via text. I always sound like a twat. At least in real life, I can charm the ‘swiney‘ bits away with boobs and eyelash flutters.

I had so much to tell you, but i’ve got completely distracted by ‘Happy endings.’

I’ll skim it.

So…This Wednesday, I’m at an event in Leeds, it’s the ‘Weaves & Waves’ event with Emma from ‘Love Island’ and I can’t wait simply because I love a good hair piece, so I’m excited to see what’s in store.

My best chick friend ‘Firmonnell’ has exceeded herself. I love her. She’s been drinking prosecco in caravans, to step digging with her mum at Motown nights. She’s felt rough, then after 30 minutes, found that she’s completely and utterly fine again..

Firmonnell: ‘What a different a wash and 30 minutes makes!’

Me: ‘Wow, you sound like a scruff bag.’

Her life seems delicious right now and i’m happy that she’s getting a good old swing in her step…Even if it drowns in prosecco pours. You know you have a bestie when they HAVE TO TELL you, how much you they adore you at 2am. That’s true love. I mean when I was in Spain….I recieved a message that read…

Firmonnell: ‘Are you back yet! I don’t like it when you’re out of the country!’

Me: ‘Don’t bother, i’m not in the mood to be missing you right now. I’m headed to the airport. You could’ve come.’

Firmonnell: ‘That’s cool. Swag it out. Oh and CHEERS! Are you a dick? You can’t invite someone to something, WHEN IT’S ALREADY FUCKING HAPPENED!’

Hahaha. I love her. I love our mad 2am messages, even though our phones refuse to type ‘fucking’ and always ‘predictive text’ out the word ‘ducking’ instead. It’s sooo annoying!

WE DON’T EVEN LIKE DUCKS! It’s so annoying!!

But it’s not just girls and 2am prosecco messages,ย  It’s the same with boys also….

Get ready for this true fact….

IF A GIRL IS NOT DRUNK TEXTING YOU….YOU’RE DEFINITELY NOT THE ONE MATE. ๐Ÿ™‚

AND THAT IS THE HONEST TRUTH! LOL.ย 

Am i going to get away with wearing flip flops today? Cheap ones, with weird pretend flowers on? Lol

I’m hating on my wonky bottom tooth today. I’m trying to not let it bother me, but it is! I’m trying not to be vain. But I am. I hate it. I want it fixed. It’s ruining my banter. You can’t banter with a buck tooth. I want veneers like ‘Big Brother’ Simone….Her teeth were brilliant! Yet, instead i’m probably going to end up ‘influencing’ something that will lead me to straighter teeth.

Right, i’m done for now. I’m having a chill day with my Mum.

Have a great Sunday! Sundays are always my favourite!

(Pete, Ruby’s Dad is here to pick her up now for the day. It’s strange because Pete and I co parent really well. He’s sweet. We get on superbly. Yet, whenever he comes over for pick ups now, I always feel like he tries to linger, or come in the house, or see me…and i’m always in my own world, when I have down time…I like to withdraw from the pleasantries…So just to wind him up, I disappear and let my mum walk her out, or have Ruby greet him by herself. Lol I’m literally nowhere to be found! ๐Ÿ™‚ Haha. I’ve even just heard him say ‘Is our mum in? Can I come in?’ Lol.)ย 

 

Image may contain: one or more people and people sitting

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Sunday Church, Preggo Porn & Pork Dumplings

DSC_0536

Morning, my sexy giggles of bubble joy.

It’s Sunday, the day of God! (Or is that Saturday?) I don’t know, i’d blow up in church? Whatever you’re doing, is better than what i’m doing, because i’m at work all day, smiling and nodding…in an outfit that merely cheers ‘average.’ Whoopppeee!

My updo rocks, so that’s all that matters. You really can get by with great eyes (if you wear my lashes ๐Ÿ™‚ ), great hair, boobs (maybe) and absolute utter charm.

I ooze charm. It streams out of my booty, like glitter glue, out of soul train rocket. (Have no clue? Don’t bother asking?)

If i could do anything today, it would be to do the things that I love. (Not as in Ben. ๐Ÿ˜‰ ) But, ‘yes’ as in Ben, as it’d just be nice to have more family time, time at home, time to pursue the my interests and dreams and have more time with the children.

I mean, gosh everyone knows that I love nothing more than making money as it makes me feel powerful. It makes me feel great. But i do absolutely envy stay at home mums, who get to…well it’s kinda self explanatory…but just yes, stay at home, be happy and with the people that they love the most. That’s why i’d pine and be obsessed with marathon episodes of ‘Real Housewives…’ as it was something that I kinda was by nature, but not at all living. Lol.

Saying that stay at home mums’ look stressed and die for free time. So, i guess life is about balance. And, what is worse than having to always ask your hubby for dosh.

The good thing about me, is that I run and steer my ship with glitz and i do it well, by myself. I’m on saving mode right now. But i’m still happy. We’re only in Jan and i feel like i’ve done so much already, in order to improve things.

I’ve not got much else to say, other than have fun at church…and PEOPLE HAVE ACTUALLY FOUND THIS BLOG TODAY, by searching ‘PREGGO PORN’ on Google.

Lol.

This makes me cry. HAHAHA. Now, i don’t want to judge. But i will anyway. But SURELY there aren’t preggo’s doing pornos??? I mean, i know that there will be, but why oh why???? I don’t get it? I don’t even blame the perverts for watching it, if it’s’ there.

When i was preggo, the last thing on my mind (and i’m loosely moraled) would’ve been to be D.P ‘ed by willies that belonged to strangers, on video…for money??? I couldn’t even put my own socks on, due to my ginormous bump and I waddled around Freeport, like a pork dumpling. Where they found the energy to them practice a cum shot, i have no clue?

It’s like that documentary that I watched with my Mum, where these 80 year old women were sex escorts. Don’t do it to yourself. It’s the only time you’ll ever hear me say, ‘be lazy.’