With a little bit of luck….

Hilarious day! I love the days when you find yourself crying with unexpected laughter, to the point where everything pauses and your insides just crease with absolute piss take! If you know me personally, you’ll know that I have a really inappropriate  sense of humour. I find really awful things funny. But luckily, so do my chicks friends. I can’t even tell you how Mel greeted me this morning, as it is far too racist and wrong. But we laughed. We laughed like besties. And good besties can say anything to one another and find it funny. It’s weird and inappropriate, yet filled with love.

Then I found myself sat in a kitchen with ‘Firmonnell’…and lets just say we can’t be trusted together. We tend to have these lunches where everything goes tits up. I don’t know what happened, but after various snapchat filters and talks about my vagina, she decided that the BEST IDEA EVER, was for me to…well this is what she said,

‘You should definitely take a picture of your vagina and do the bush filter that trims itself into a heart! It’s HILARIOUS.’

Me: ‘Please don’t make me do that… EVER. HAHAH. I’m not snapchatting my vagina.’

Firmonnell: ‘And the funniest part is the fact that you’re gonna have to open bits to make the bush start trimming itself into a fucking heart! HAHAHAH! I’m dying!!’

Ofcourse i’m not an idiot and therefore her request was denied. But I will tell you that she totally stole someone’s VIP booth at the weekend, when her ‘totally not called Jen’ friend pretended to be someone totally called ‘Jen,’ who had apparently won some radio competition, where the prize was a VIP booth and booze.

Thye got all scared whilst pretending to be ‘Jen’ the VIP booth competition winner, but then after booze…

‘We better drink fast, incase she shows up’

…It seems they did not care one bit for ‘Jen’ and instead, they were quite prepared to offer to ‘Out Jen’ Jen, if Jen came.

‘I’m the better Jen. I’ll have a Jen off with her.’

I obviously choose my friends wisely. I was no part of this. I’m just proud of her. Lol.

Then I decided to share my new Cougar Cosmetics ‘Perfect Pout’ in Mulberry with the girls, alongside a smear of Volume lip pout. You know you have great friends, when you can stop shit for bit and just add a bit of ‘Volume Gloss’ to your lips. We all quit work for a few minutes simply to *pout* in our new lips.

‘My lips are stuck to my water bottle.’

Great Company! Great cosmetic line. Love that it’s called ‘Cougar.’

I had really great news today! Really great news! Again I can’t tell you about it yet. But it made me beam. If I could give you nay advice, it would be to do what you are good at. It doesn’t matter what it is, yet as long as you’re great at it, you will excel, because it will come so naturally to you. When you do the things that you’re great at…good things happen, because you put value and talent out there…and in return life throws you a glitter bone and slides you down a trophy. YEAH BABY! (I actually only told one person about it…and that person made me feel good, because they just understood  it all, got it all and replied with a ‘Ur on flames babe. ‘ Made me smile.)

But yes, I seem to have a lot of wonderful things happening to me in all areas right now. I can’t really believe it, but it’s all flipping great! I mist have wished upon a star sometime after wine and had all my dreams come true.

With the right wiggles, the correct winks and my fingers crossed in hope…all should be be panning out perfectly.

I guess some dreams come true….hard work, a lot of love and the best support around is what gets you where you need to be.

I’m early nighting it tonight.

Love you,

Chrissie

ps/ I’m still waiting for three more ‘good news’ calls.

 

 

 

 

 

 

When I got back into Stockings….

So, as all you lot drizzled in Bank Holiday madness, filled with *can can* kicks and sparkler lit cocktails to popular bar beats, as you *winked* at ‘Handsomes’ and eyed up the easy girls…I stayed in, wore a jumper (fair enough it had cherries on it, but that’s hardly wanging it out with conga lines is it) and had to rest in the peace of calm of Wunna land, away from trouble, late nights and any ridiculous mayhem because I had a shoot the next morning. A shoot that I wanted to SMASH. A boudoir shoot.

I even Snapchatted my…

‘Hey i’m staying in because I have a shoot tomorrow, in piglet ears…’ 

LOOK!

Are you following me? No? You have poor taste! Add me now: chrissiewunna1

That’s what I did today. Smashed a shoot. It felt great to be productive at short notice and by accident. 🙂 Yippeee!

Early morning rise, a quick eyelash flutter and a Skinny Tan. I had a bit of a moment yesterday. Even though all was really well, something happened that involved me having to take a minute, a drive away in order to feel okay about things again. Not a biggie. Just a Keiran/Junior issue that hurt my heart for a second. After a wine, a chat with my mum and a Solero, I was fine again. 🙂 When I have niggly problems…I shout about them and have a ‘not real’ sulk. But when something happens that’s big enough to make me properly FEEL, I take it on the life chin, withdraw for a moment and come out of my cave *beaming* like i’ve won some kind of ‘figured it out’ trophy.

This morning, at around noon, (we both got stuck in traffic) I met Clare Pritchard, outside her studio on Westgate, Wakefield and followed her up some fabulous spiral staircases, to her super creative studio and for my very first shoot as a ‘Fallen Angel.’ You should ALL want to be a ‘Fallen Angel.’ What a sassy title…

Now, I’ve met Claire before. We have a mutual friend. (Mel.) Today…I had the BEST time ever, with one of the most talented, unique and creative photographers that I have ever worked with…and I would never just say that, as I’m quite particular when it comes to a bit of picture taking, aren’t I!

I’ve shot with a lot of people in my time. LOTS! All over this merry Earth Ball.However let me tell you, Lil’ Miss Pritchard has GOT IT. She is one sassy, photographic genius. I’ve never had anyone direct me so well through a shoot, show me her version of ‘life’ through a lens and really give me a grasp, a feel of what we were going to produce as a team. I love direction. I take it well. I listen. I perform. I respect a photographer always…But Clare will create mood boards, suggest styling, she’ll get stuck in with you and understand how you work and try and deliver her direction appropriately, to your character. I loved it.

As a model….I’m a go for it kinda girl. I find it easy because I love it. But it’s NOT EASY. You have to love it. I wanted to shoot well. I wanted to nail it. I didn’t want to let her down and you’ll only let a photographer down if you’re not comfortable, confident…or a bitch. 🙂

I’ll always love a boudoir shoot. They’re my favourite. There’s a glamourous sexiness to them. So it just felt so GREAT to be slipping out of my jeans and slipping into my kitten stockings and heels again, to mood music, good lighting and for a bit of sexy picture taking. I was back in my ‘battle wear.’ The uniform.

‘Chrissie….chin down, head forward, look to me.. straight to camera, chin down…and YES…good face…FIERCE.’

We had the most hilarious time, as there we were in the middle of Wakefield, with her big lights and camera and my little dinky lingerie numbers, in the studio creating the most amazing shots. Honestly…she’s great and she can direct ‘sexy’ because she IS so sexy. She would literally SHOW ME what she wanted…and being visual, i’d get it, copy it and smash it. We were such a good team. We laughed the whole time. And it was really great being shot by a girl…as I have never ever in my entire life been shot my a female photography. It helps so much with boudoir, as no one knows a woman’s body better than another woman.

‘Chrissie, there’s a bit of a nipple out on that shot…but ah well it looks good. Lol. Remind me about the fan. Chin down…head forward! BEAUTIFUL! The light on your skin tone is amazing. You look so elegant! GREAT FACE!!! Chin down…’

‘Sorry…I just get carried away and think i’m a showgirl and my head starts kicking back…’

We just pissed ourselves laughing.

‘We should’ve brought Prosecco…’

Nothing was more Girl Power. We’re both sassy. Both creative. Both want to do well. I’d be getting naked and slipping into my next outfit…

‘I won’t look…I’ll turn away and pretend i’m playing with these lights.’

‘Haha…honestly, it’s fine. Worse things have happened to me. 🙂 ‘

…as Clare would be trying to carry these ginormous lights out into the artsy corridor, after showing me the mood of the next set. She is awesome for that, as I’m a story teller…and she’ll direct me by showing me and telling me the story of the next set. It’s sexy AND THE BEST WAY for me TO WORK. It brings soul to the shoot and a simple yet glamourous sex appeal, a ‘LIFE’ to the pictures. That’s something you can’t force…as it’s something you need to FEEL. I loved the raw shots that I saw. (I usually never love the raw shots that I see. Lol)  I haven’t worked with anyone as great when it comes to boudoir picture taking, in a really long time. (I can’t tell you ALL the banter, as you’d literally die of shock! 🙂 )

But yes, these pictures are BIG. They’re important to us both. No one has seen new pictures of me in a while and since that while, i’ve kinda built myself a big old success ladder and climbed up a few more rungs. 😉 These pictures are going to circulate around social media like wild fire…so yeah there’s a bit of pressure and yeah it was important to me that I shot well (I couldn’t fuck it up.) At the same time it’s important to Clare because ..well these are her images, they will represent her work, her reputation and her ‘Fallen Angel’ brand. It’s a bit scary now i’ve said that.

I knew it was going to be great from the get go, as FIRST SHOT in, I felt so comfy, straight away… we smashed it and I saw a *beam* on her face, a confident *nod* as she looked up from her camera and just said,

‘This feels gooood…’

We had a laugh, but we worked hard, so i’m really excited for you to see what we came up with. I loved my time with Clare so much i’m shooting with her again…I CAN’T WAIT. We got on so well.

Yet the great thing about today (other than the cocktails that I treated myself to afterward at Ego 🙂 ) was the simple fact that she reminded me how much I loved slipping on those stockings and delicate lingerie bits. I loved shooting today. I felt so feminine. I felt like I really embraced and celebrated being a woman. She reminded me how much I loved being in front of  camera. How much I loved getting my ‘model’ mode on. You can do something so much that you forget to love it, right? You forget to stop and just look at what you have or what you’re doing!

Today she reminded me how lucky I was and how much I loved what i do, the blogging, the shoots, the entertaining, the creative swirl of it all….It’s magic! AND she inspired me to do well. She brought out the best in me…and nothing is sexier than human who can make you feel alive….

Best shoot ever…

www.clarepritchardphotography.com

 

 

 

Booty Bum Bursts!

Today was the day when I must have *bent over* without a  kitty care in the world and the ENTIRE BACK SEAM of my dress *RIPPED* open, presenting the *WUNNA BOOTY* to all the land! 🙂

Hurrah! Booties for everyone!

As if i’ve managed to get so fat…Well I like to say ‘Playground’ because I heard it on ‘Real Housewives of Atlanta’ being used as a term for ‘Being Bootilicious’…But yes, now it’s official… I am absolutely TOO ‘BOOTY’ to wear a pencil dress. You want a Kardashian Bum? You go to Greggs and have a sausage roll and latte EVERY FLIPPING DAY and you’ll own a *booty,* SO BUSTING, that it makes like the ‘Incredible Juicy Hulk’ and glamourously *bursts* out of your pencil dress like it’s Beyonce.

I literally had my bum out all day, because I couldn’t be arsed (excuse my pun) to buy a new dress. I’ve done worse. A bit of bum cheek is fine. 😉 I was infact, the least shocked… out of the entire bunch..and it was MY ASS that was out.

Oh but let me tell you….

What did my ‘ride or die’ glammy chick friends do? Offer me support? Love? Remedies to my problem?

No…

They fucking pointed, laughed out loud, called me a dickhead and showed everybody my freshly ripped *booty peek* whilst snaphatting it!

Me: ‘What? I can’t see anything??’

‘Honestly! Chrissie! The back of your dress is flapped open… like a hospital gown! Hahahahaha!’

‘Is it THAT BAD? Have I got good knickers on?’

‘Yeah, they’re black lace. Hahah!’

I will say that Mel did offer me a moment of…

‘Safety pins? Shall we safety pin or staple you back up? Shit…I don’t have any? Sorry lol.’

Then just to keep things moving, I attempted to make fun of ‘Hot Sarah’ for no real reason really..and she shot it back with a..

‘You can’t make fun of my face when you’re in an ass out dress.’

‘Whatever! Everyone will be doing it tomorrow.’

I was totally like that ‘whatcha m’call her’ chick from ‘Mean Girls’ with the nipple shirt. I ROCKED my ‘ass out‘ pencil dress.

I mean, GOD ‘Webbo‘ and ‘The King of the North’ didn’t seem to mind and I used Webbo’s window as a mirror.

‘I honestly can’t see anything! Can you? Is my bum out?’

They invited such ‘jiggery pokkery’ into their world, with love, Bromantic ‘you’ll not have your Portugal body,‘ hugs and a bottle of Archers in their hands.

Then ‘the new boy’ started singing Ed Sheran songs and telling me that he has a pet bunny….(yes, you heard.) He then went on to explain that he saved his girlfriend from a dodgy life in Hull and dragged her to a dodgy life… just outside of Bradford. Lol.

Me: ‘A bunny? That’s…I’m pretending to be nice. That is actually really weird! LOL.’

All was dandy, all was well and then ‘Feisty Gem’ makes the executive decision to wear white ‘bowling shoes’ with her very dark tights…which caused me to panic a little.

*Panic.Panic.* It’s like acid to the eyes.*

Especially when i’m in my Specsaver Specs. (I’m waiting for my contact lenses to arrive.) Right now I have EXTRA DOUBLE STRENGTH VISION! It’s intense. But, *applause* to her, as  I did laugh at her naughty sassiness today, even though she committed to poor shoe choices.

‘You’re like the naughty rebellious one.’

Then ‘Double B’ piped in with a shake of ‘diva’ and a dazzle of  ferocity, as she was deliciously misheard by Firmonell…

Double B: ‘How rude was that guy! Don’t talk to me like that! GOD! I want to march down there and flick him on his fucking nose.’

Firmonnell: ‘Ewwwwwwwwww! You’re vile.’

Firmonnell thought that Double B had suggested she would *punish* the rude talking male by not ‘flicking‘ his nose, but ‘FUCKING’ his nose. Lol.

‘I said FLICKING!!!! WHY WOULD I EVER TREAT HIM TO THAT!’

As IF the ‘not flicking‘ would EVER be a treat!!! ABSOLUTELY DYING! Being a boy SUCKS. Being a girl is Wunnaful! (‘Wunnaful‘ is a state that surpasses the fine art of something feeling WONDERFUL.)

Then Mel started moderately describing a human, in her natural sassy downgrady but lovey‘ way, to the ‘King of The North,’ who is about to be forced off the Island….

Mel: ‘I mean, I’ve met her… She’s alright, but she’s just hard faced…Y’know, a bit abrupt, tells it how it is…She’s a bit grumpy…WAIT! I’VE JUST DESCRIBED MYSELF!’

King of the North, ‘Chrissie! Bend over again!’

Y’know, today was all about fun. It was bubbled with naughty laughter and was shimmied about in BANTER. You’ve got to have a charming wink of ‘chitter’ in your soul. It’s a weapon I mean, I ADORE a delicious ‘banter trifle,’ where humour kicks in and uncensored wording flies out.  It’s cheeky, it’s naughty. It’s flirty. It’s fun! More than anything it makes life so much more worthwhile. You need those moments in’life,’ as they help keep your spirit alive. Your spirit is that *magic* that radiates from you when you laugh out loud, or your eyes smile, or you surrender into a ‘love swirl.’ It’s your spirit that is attractive to someone like me. I like to feel a chemistry,

(‘Hot Sarah’ …who i now want to name ‘Hustle Barbie’ has just sent me a Snapchat. It’s of her… with her big fluffy cat…and with the ‘teddy leopard ear’ filter! Haha! Love it! Almost as hilarious as ‘Fairytale Blond’ with the  Yorkshire Terrier *plonked* on her head. Lol. Wow! It must be so weird being a blond! 🙂 )

On the whole…

I know some really great people and hopefully i’ll know them forever. Yet if i don’t…i’ll always remember this chapter of my life….

Lady Shizzle: ‘Something tells me that you’re moving onto better times Chrissie… I know it. This is your year…’

 

 

 

Single by Choice?

images (41)

Aren’t I a busy kitten! I smashed into Monday with a massive work day, a strut and a ‘let’s get on with it, dolls.’ Busy day! But i’m made for busy! I’m excited by it! And not because it makes time fly, but because i feel like i’m being put to good use. 🙂 Nothing is worse to me than dawdling, on any level. If i love doing something, be it work, play or in love. 😉 I’ll go for it whole heartedly and never want to be shit at it. It’s call passion…and sometimes, if it’s event….tequila. 🙂 (*It makes you happy.*)

I balanced out my glammy Leeds lifestyle swirl, with a weekend of chilling and being Mum. Junior was a joy. Ruby was a delicious nightmare…and they tagged teamed me in public, in front of on lookers who weirdly watched everything, at the same time as pretending that they weren’t watching. Lol. It was odd. But i styled it out glamourously, (code for ‘like a dickhead’) with Ruby LAID on a store floor, attached to my ankle, SCREAMING things at me, as I gracefully did this calm, warm looking, pretend ‘oh darrrling’ DRAAAAG thing…whilst smiling. I fake smiled so much that my oriental face nearly EXPLODED. I WAS FUMING! Lol. And when I say ‘DRAAAAG’ thing, i do mean a slow, heavy, long winded, leg pull and not…act like I was RuPaul…as I wasn’t superior enough to own such a character at that point, taking off my weave and pulling out any form of ‘privates’ would certainly have made it all worse.

Anyway, great weekend!

But away from all that. I’ve actually met some really awesome new people from doing the Leeds Lifestyle thing. I’d move to Leeds. I remember at one point, looking up and around me, whilst I was stood outside on the red carpet, at night, when it was all quiet and seeing the illuminated ‘Leeds Dock’ sign and thinking how ace the city actually was and how lucky I was to be right there. I’ve chatted to loads of people since that night, girls, guys, all the people that I met there. It’s been great! I have loads of social things planned with them and I’m looking forward to ‘can canning’ the year out on glittery victory surf board!

Loads of little opportunities have come from that night! Entertainment has come a knocking. And i can’t wait to have a go at them all and see what happens. Plus, I’m looking forward to celebrating the launches of others AND blog for them all.

I will say that everyone keeps asking me if i pulled that night? I really didn’t. I didn’t hit on anyone and even though potential suitors swanned around Wunna land with charm, winks and smiles, no one actually hit on me.  I mean, one gent messaged me afterward, after finding me on Twitter, which was really sweet, yet it was a guy who i never actually got to bump into during the night. So, no, i didn’t pull at all. I just enjoyed life, being moi and doing cocktails.

I’m good like that as yeah I guess, i’m as they say ‘single by choice’ but it’s really by accident, as it’s unintentional, i’m happy either way. I’m quite happy to do ‘togetherness’ and adventure it up with a life buddy who i’ll adore madly and high five ‘loyalty’ with (provided he’s right lol) OR just embrace every single wink of being a single independant chick, who tickles around events with a wine, excitement, sequins and…boobies. Lol.

What could be better!

I’ve been talking to ‘Eton Mess’ (for ages now) and i want to swoosh up to see him shortly. He’s just great! Such a laugh. Ever so handsome and we seem to just get along. I mean, he started off ‘sort of’ being in friend zone for ages, but after hanging out and chatting…and more so now, he’s certainly smashed that door down and ‘high fived’ me in the ‘potential’ arena. I like ‘Eton Mess’ I make the effort to make sure our paths do crossing. I fancy him. He’s awesome.

Weirdly, ‘London Business Man’ who’s ended up being a good friend, after he began his journey into Wunna land, by presenting himself as a suitor, under complicated circumstances, a long while ago, messaged me last night. We still occasionally talk about how rubbish our love lives are and give each other rubbish advice etc.. But last night, he popped out of nowhere with a message, after I pretty much watched the most hilarious ‘monkey faced’ video of him, and stated that he was ‘crazy about me, had been the whole time’ and that he ‘did tell me’ and that i apparently told him to ‘go away?’ I don’t remember telling him to go away. Lol I simply stated that i wouldn’t allow myself to be ‘wedged’ inbetween chicks. But on the whole, he’s a good guy. Really different to’Eton Mess.’ They’re similar, yet different. I understand  ‘London Business Man’ and how he is, I get on with him really well,we have a laugh. Yet my spirit plays better with ‘Eton Mess.’ I can sort of be myself. He’s current and very ‘present.’ I don’t have to watch what I say or how i am. There’s a warmness about him. Yet it’s dashed in sexiness. London Business man was almost a bit scared to be warm to me, in a not so scared, charming way? But something tells me that he’s going to MAKE HIMSELF more present. Especially now that my interest seems to be focused elsewhere..