New Dates, Mates & Old Flames…

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LA Bestie: ‘How the hell are you still alone’

Me: ‘Haha. Wow! Cheers. Stop saying ALONE at me. I’m fine. FFs.’

LA Bestie: ‘I actually meant ALIVE. Lol. I really did.’

Me: ‘Oh? That…I definitely don’t know! Just lucky aren’t I. 😉 I need a fresh orange juice..’

LA Bestie: ‘What?? Honestly. What has happened to you?? Dead to me. Orange juice?’ 

Me: ‘IN MY MALIBU, you idiot. I don’t order juice.’

How’ve you all been? I’ve had to take a few days off blogging, because work, auditions. socializing, surprises, shocks and single mum life sped into a WHOLE different lane and I was pretty much slow jogging in stillettos behind. If i didn’t hit *pause* I would’ve lost the plot!

I like to keep on top of things. I’m not one to lag behind with ease… 

I hate not managing things appropriately. It stresses me out.

So yeah, right now, my life’s not easy.  I’m happy. But it ain’t easy. It’s a really hard juggle, to be honest. But THANK GOD, i’m back to ‘tipper tappering’ at my laptop, because I swear, it’s my saving grace. (Well, once I get my ‘swing’ back, anyhow. At first it’s shit and definitely feels like it needs rum cocktails pouring all over it.)

RUM TING PLEASE…

I’m just gonna jump the gun and tell you that I got this voice note, the other day, that followed a message. Remember I told you that a few weeks ago, a guy, a lovely older gentleman, had tinkered into my DM’s.

I’ve hardly ever been on a date with anyone older than me…I don’t know why? Maybe because my surroundings are always young. The last older guy, that I actually went on a date with…was Matt Dillon..whilst I was in LA. 

Crackers innit!

(Wait, I’ve lied. both ‘London Business Man’ and ‘Eton Mess’ were older than me. Yet, only by a couple years…They kinda seem boyish in comparison to the ‘voice note’ guy Yet, they’re both happily in relationships now…& I’m happy for them, as they certainly weren’t right for me. I can be treated better than that.) 

ANYWAY….The Gentleman..

He initially messaged me with a picture and then a couple voice notes…and I liked it, because hearing someones voice makes a difference. (Not my awful voice though.) But it’s true…A voice or a video helps a connection… doesn’t it?

I felt that he was SO polite and gentle, yet sweet and fun. He was really respectful. He wasn’t smutty. He led with his romantic foot forward. And I am ever so used to hearing smut, or the game of charm.

I mean, remember that also a couple weeks ago, a German footballer, slid into my insta DM’s…and was pretty much the opposite. He started with the usual ‘you’re beautiful’ stuff…then led it straight to the land of Smut.

I get that…it’s fine…However…

..at that point, I just ignored him…cos whatever…I’m too old for that shit.

Anyway, the other guy, who I always label a ‘gentleman.’ (I say label, because I haven’t actually spoken to him much and I’ve certainly never met him.) Back to the point..He sent me a message at the weekend…Was it Friday? AGAIN, followed by a voice note.

I like a surprise voice note..or video.

It helps me connect faster…(I’ve said that already, haven’t I?) 

Weeks ago, and I did blog this, he had asked if I’d like to go on a ‘friendly dinner,‘ with him, to ‘say hi, properly.’ He doesn’t live in the country, yet obviously he ventures to the UK quite a lot with work. His occupation…Pundit. He’s a retired footballer.

I should balls and a nets for my yard of milkshake, as it seems they’re the only guys that want to play Wunna Land, right now? They find me..

So, I get this message, at the weekend, saying that he’ll be over here on 18th…for work and it would be lovely to meet me.

Wow! Impressed!

I get asked out quite a lot…(that isn’t meant to sound conceited…it’s just the truth and we love a bit of truth in Wunna Land.) I always say ‘no.’ Or just ignore the message. I mean, I must be a sucker for eternal loneliness, because I definitely would love to find my Mr.Right, yet I ignore everyone who DM’s me. Lol.

It’s because i’m a happy singleton.

I’m never miserable about single life. I enjoy life. I still enjoy love. I’m just one of those chicks, who is sure my Knight will saunter up out of nowhere…one day, when he’s had his tea and ready. 

Fate will force him to…

Anyway, I haven’t ignored this ‘gentleman.‘ I need to give him a nickname, don’t I? That’ll come. Yet, bottom line…I’ve agreed to go meet him for ‘friendly dinnering,’ simply because he was so utterly and sincerely sweet to me via voice note. He treated me really normally, yet like a lady. He sounded nurturing and I love nurturing ‘I’ll keep you safe ‘ kinda men.

So, we’ll see what happens…I’m open to it..

I feel like i’ve had this really fun Summer of debauchery and irresponsible, sunshiny behaviour. We’ll all remember Summer ’18. It was fun. Yet, I kinda miss focusing on what i’m doing. Glamorously, of course.  I love what I do and I love what I have…and I’m really lucky, to have the mini opportunities, come my way…Hopefully, one day, the mini ones, will turn into BIG ones.

If i’m being honest…

I kinda started to feel stifled, over the last couple weeks and I’ve been on the search for excitement and adventure. A new chapter, with more balance. You’re a product of your environment..I was becoming one…and not being a chick to enjoy the ‘same old ting,’ I got my balance sorted.

I found me a new chapter..

(…and it took nothing but determination.. Something I am oozed in.)

I’ve been with my family. (My strength.)  I’ve been with the kids. (My world.) I’ve worked hard, (my passion)… auditioned lots (my challenge)..and still managed to cocktail my way to happiness, whilst being over eyelashes, boobied and fully lipped. (Just who I am.)

Let’s *clink* wine glasses to that!

Summer 2018, was really important to me, because I learnt a lot about myself…and I was actually a little broken hearted, through it. Hence why I celebrated, enjoyed and drank a lot. Well, I say broken hearted…but I began with a solid stance. Then emotionally ventured to ‘all over the place,’ which led me to naughty fun (because of course I’m that way inclined..) and was left with my eyes open...WIDE open…my ears a listening (they could hear everything once more)…and as I screwed my head back on, bundled up my heart strings, back into my hands, ready for the next round of blissful, romantic tugging…I realized that my mind, my gut…my body…my everything…just kept lulling back to, reflecting back to…and utterly missing….(back to…lol)…..

..The Swirl.

(Who I renamed ‘T Bone.’)

So, I know that i’m not gonna to go through life, without encountering ‘T Bone’ again…I mean, I might do? But I doubt it, because we get on so well…

My gut just tells me…

Yet the timing of it all…. ‘our ting,’ has always been off. Life has never cut me some slack with that old timing shindig. But I’m willing to see and willing to wait on it.

Right now, he’s no where near me, he recently moved to another country for work…and he’s pretty focused on that and doing his version of life out there.

So, now that i’ve done my Summer of ‘heartache’ (lol…a heartache, that I didn’t realize was happening…) I’m pretty ready to explore…and let my little kitty eyes, take a peeky and who else, of DECENT POTENTIAL…that i’m attracted to… is a knocking?

Right?

September 18th…’Friendly dinner,’ here I come…

Ps? I keep getting a Flashback of Ms.Derry, being sat on the  ‘door wide open’ loo, with her leopard print shorts down by her ankles, as she wee’d, told me she fractured her hand, because she fell, whilst flamenco dancing down the pavement. She was in those shorts, that night too.

Then she wiped up, jumped up, pulled this make up stamper thing, out of her hand bag and stamped my hand with a tiny, black love heart.

It was beautiful. Made me smile.

Be beautiful always…

Text From Your Ex Boy

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I shocked myself up this morning, after the craziest dream. A dream that was filled, with almost every single ex or sexy fumble, that I could’ve ever encountered. Yet, they were all being lovely and in love with me, but showing up at my door? Then I picked one, who was being the opposite to how he has been of recent…and he decided to love me forever.

Why am I tapped? Who dreams shit like that!!

Then there was a knock at my door!

*Tap.Tap.Tap.*

I looked out the window and Keiran’s van (Junior’s Dad) had just pulled up outside. I’m half naked, so I have to throw together, the most random outfit, put on sunglasses and leg it to the door.

Ruby’s shouting..

‘Junior’s back already??’

I swing open the door. Keiran smiled with his eyes. Junior leapt into my arms, with glee and I just swung the door shut, with my sunglasses on, as Keiran laughed at my ‘just got uppidness.’ and walked away.

No words were even exchanged. Lol

Yet, it was hilarious. The moment was filled with warmth and humour.

Then I got a text from an ex…

‘I miss you.’

Hit play…

Why do exes always miss me? Why didn’t you just love me when you had me? Lol. It’s not that wacky a concept, is it?? This means that I must be the kinda girl that eventually grows on a guy..Y’know, when they’ve got over JUST thinking with their willies.

Always! Always! It’ll be months after..and then they’ll have a rethink, after it didn’t quite work out with some other chick, or they think they’ve made a mistake…Then they come to rekindle.

But it kinda makes me feel good, because it makes me feel empowered. Like I’m a treasure of a chicadee…

I’m not really a rekindler…

UNLESS..

They do it correctly.

I’m looking for a fun, emotionally stable, reliable…not a lost douche, who either thinks i hate men, i’m evil or …you get the picture. lol.

In fact, the other night, a guy kept saying that he felt weirdly starstruck, didn’t know what to say to me, had once read a blog and knew that I hated men??

Me: ‘I really don’t hate men. I love men. In fact if I was honest, if it wasn’t for men… I wouldn’t have built an entire career.’

I definitely feel like I WANT to be loved and adored right now. (Maybe, even a little pampered. 😉 ) Y’know, be someones ‘special chica.’

Yet, that will come, when it comes…I’m lucky enough, to have a pretty good life anyhow. A life that’s filled with love, regardless. I’m a picky girl and this time, I want to get it right. I want to make someone happy, but BE happy at the same time.

But I expect to couple again…

Right now, being single feels good, because i’m not having to sacrifice anything. It’s one less problem. I feel free. Yet, don’t ever get it twisted and think that I don’t like men. I just want to pick well…and I know that a pretty good, love life, is in the stars for me.

I can feel it in my little Burmese bones.

(Always trust your guy instinct. Nothing is more powerful)

Do I fancy someone right now?

Yes.

I’ll say my mind is on someone…Yet not much, in fact, nothing is happening.

It’s kinda making me feel a little deluded. Lol. Yet, wishes come true every single second, on this Earth ball and with all the luck on my side…

I reckon i’m gonna be alright.

I’m about to step into a really exciting time work wise and I’m really happy to have you come with me.

Every single moment, I truly appreciate you clicking on this blog. It’s only the story of my life in diary form..Yet ife is the only thing we have. Your job doesn’t matter. Your car doesn’t matter. Your outfit, house or really shitty girlfriend doesn’t matter. Without the ability to wake up every single morning…YOU HAVE NOTHING.

Please do treasure your existence. This is just MY story. But I LOVE YOUR story…and doing my LIFE, has taught me a lot about people and their own ‘bits and pieces.’ I’m never one to shun, disregard, or be unkind to anyone…I kinda just understand shit. I guess, that’s why I hate it when people refuse to understand, judge or take advantage of me.

I’d never do that. I’d never dream of doing that to someone.

(However, saying that..the 20 something version of me, in Hollywood, would’ve been JUST THAT. I certainly did that to others and learnt karma the hard way. Yet at 37 and a hell of a lot more successful and grown…I would never DREAM of treating anyone, with disregard, disrespect…or malice…unless, ofcourse…they deserved it. 😉 ) 

Chick friend: ‘Wunna’s a really good person..and it’s something people forget, because they so caught up in an image and a set of tits.’

I send you all my love.

Bless ya!

Chrissie x

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ps/ I’m getting loads of messages about the @RubyandJunior instagram thing..and I’m gonna be addressing that tomorrow. I’ll tells you, what went down.

 

I’ll Tells You What I Fancy In GUYS…..

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Hope you’re having the most beautiful Thursday! Going well for you? I truly hope so. You all deserve a bit of love, luck and happiness. And thank you so much for finding you way to Wunna Land. It’s utterly much appreciated.

I’m quite dandy today and I don’t really know why? But i’m kinda brimming over with the ‘joy joys’ and I love it when that happens, because it’s such a great feeling. It fills my sorry ass soul with light.

You won’t know this, but every morning in Wunna land, Ruby, Junior  (my babies) and I are woken up by a hand picked song, that plays and fills each room in the house. I believe it puts us all in a good mood. I’m a huge music lover. And even if you’re hungover, it’s ace, because it makes you think the party is still going on.

Today’s choice was by my five year old, Baby Junior and it was this…So i’m gonna put it on for you, so you can feel today’s vibe…

*Hit Play Now.*

Then KatyP sends me a whatsapp message stating that we should pack up boxes of super strength dildos, make sure the boxes are labelled ‘SUPER STRENGTH DILDOS‘ and drop them outside each of our friends doorsteps.

KatyP: ‘Claire would expect it to be full. Lol.’

Me: ‘It’s fine, we can just chuck in a couple of kitchen knives and say it’s bondage or summat.’

KatyP: ‘We’ll put a soap on a rope in there too..’

Me: ‘And a teddy to cuddle, for after the ordeal.’

Then she gave me a list of Adult Cereals that went along the lines of ‘Fifty Shades of Grain/Special D/Porn Flakes/Rice Friskies’ that I could consider munching, as  I’m actually a breakfast skipper. (I just do coffee and selfie taking and yeah lol…it’s really bad for your system. You should always have breakfast.) My favourite was ‘Cheery Hoes.‘ So if I do ever consider eating before 9am…

They’d be my first choice of delight.

Away from that, I loved Love Island last night. I still fancy Adam. I don’t know why some people don’t. He’s far too attractive to not adore and his personality, to me… is on point. Like I don’t care if he’s sweet, but egotistical, kind, but cocky…In general, I love that in a guy. I love a guy with ‘gusto.’

Y’know, when they know what they want and how to get it. It not only means they’ve used their brain, yet also learnt along the way of life…and studied girls with a sly carefulness. I don’t mind a guy who fancies himself as a bit of charmer, but only when it’s executed well.  I like ‘smooth’ not cheeky. Cheeky is young. ‘Smooth’ is grow ass man. I like a soft gentleman, mixed in with a delicious roaring swag. I go for sexy. I love sexy.

It’s hot.

I still fill as though the Doctor is gonna get pied off by Rosie, ‘The Solictor’ though. I mean, she used date Jordan Weekender…which means she’s gonna swoop on in for MY ADAM. Haha. Hurrah!! Poor Alex.

I had ace chats about this with my chickadee Zara (who works at Creator Hair in Sheffield) late last night. I think we decided we loved each other and then decided that all men were twats.

Why are they though? We’re proper catches!

Then we talked about cougars and how every young guy goes through his ‘cougar phase.‘ I’m not agest by any means. I can’t afford to be emotionally. Lol.

However, I’ve always ended up with a toyboy. I don’t know whether that’s because i’m the oldest girl in the world, living a young life or because I’ve never found an older man, (apart from ONE..who is my mate ‘Trigg’ who i find extremely attractive. I mean, for 42, he’s a looker. You should stalk his Insta: Simon T Trigg. It’s a grow up girls treat.)

Me: ‘I don’t think a 20 something guy would ever really  seriously consider being with a 30 something yr old girl…long term..’

Zara: ‘You’d be surprised…’

Me: ‘I just don’t think, they’d look to settle down with someone quite a bit older, in the end…It’s just a phase for them. Yeah, we’re by far better women, all grown up, no drama and better in bed…

Zara: ‘When you’re in Sheffield at the end of the month. I know you’ll already have somewhere to stay, but feel free to stay at mine. Oh shit. Wait. And that’s not because you’ve just said you’re good in bed. Hahahahahahaha. 

I love Zara. She’s ace. When she first met me, (at the Weaves & Waves event in Leeds, she came with Sam etc) she didn’t like me and was certainly unsure, then hours in… she thought I was okay and finally, at the very end of the night, she decided she did. I literally love her.  I find her funny, she makes my evil soul fill with laughter. She’s a good find. Aw! Yeah and I saw that Sam BURNT HIS HEAD with straighteners today on his Insta story…

‘Mr. Assured Chrissie Wunna, that HE NEVER BURNS ANYTHING, whilst doing hair.’  

All he did was emoji piss himself at me…then got on with life.

(Ooh, i’ve just got a message in from ‘Firmonnell.’ She’s one of my chick besties,  but she’s in France..camping. Once sec, let me see what she’s got to say, because I miss her…)

It was a snapchat of her face with flower filter ears, Lol…with text reading..

‘Thought you might miss my face…’

Why can’t guys be as thoughtful as girls? Why are we girls all so attentive with one another, yet when we date, the guy’s we’ve chosen (aside from KatyP, who has the most romantic ‘Golfer Jonny’…even though she’s *six day* sore..) are FAR LESS so…? Why are relationships always hard work? They shouldn’t be. But maybe it’s me. That’s why I’M single…always. Lol.

I do love, love and i’m a hopeless romantic. But honestly, where is he? I know we’re not meant to have a perfect man in our heads. But I’m quite happy being single until that man rocks up..I don’t think i’m a bad woman. I think i’m a great woman. And my imaginary perfect man, isn’t made up of a list like most girls, it is all based upon how he would make me FEEL. That’s all I care about. Alongside handsome, sexy and stable.

I love eye candy. It’s always been a part of me that’s been really shallow.

I will always want to be with a really attractive man, provided his personality matches up to his looks. So technically, I’m balanced. 😉

Someone’s just sent me a link to read. I click on it, and all it does is unfold me really really slloooowly, then it states as a headline, ‘Paris Hiltons British Best Friend, slips a nips during photoshoot.’ 

Thrilling news…

Love you,

Chrissie x

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Gino’s, Issho & A Bit of Bottega Milanese

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So, last week, I think it was Tuesday, after I shocked myself up, the night before, dashed off a train, only to find myself in Newcastle, which was of course wasn’t Leeds and of course completely the wrong stop! Yipppeee! I waited for ages, hopped back on a train and tinkered home, got in at around 1am…and woke up the next morning ready for work and lets face it, ready to ‘work it.’

*Wiggle, Wink.*

The city was Leeds. A city close to my heart. And my number of stop off’s, shimmied to THREE…and I LOVE it when I get to visit loads of my faves in one day. It gets me excited…and you get to watch it, as I place it on my Insta story…(which is the whole point to me going.)

I actually fooled myself into thinking that if I wore pinstripes and looked moderately smart, I wouldn’t feel as tired and everyone would think I was sassy and posh. Haha. But whenever, I do venture into the city centre, through the day…I always dress quite smart anyway, because it’s that kinda city. We’re quite eclectic, yes…But we’re also quite ‘bouji.’ There’s a sense of style, grace and fun…no matter what walk of life you head into the city from.

You’ll strut…not walk. You’ll pass shoulders with young professionals in suits. You’ll cross city streets next to PR girls in heels. Everyone is well turned out…The city is alive. Everyone’s filled with ambition and ready to make something glorious out of themselves…It is a ‘stop off for a cocktail at noon,’ kinda town.

And for someone like ME…What could be better.

Plus, I always walk through the city and never drive through it, simply because I can only FEEL IT and blog about it, when i’m immersed in the middle of it.

At around 12.30, I tottered into my favourite ‘daytime gig’, which is the Espresso bar ‘La Bottega Milanese.’ I go there all the time, when I fancy a bit of peace, yet fun, because the tunes in that joint are SO good. It’s sort of R & B ish, which you wouldn’t expect from such an airy, calm place of creativity.

I blogged from the high bench, hungover on Tuesday..and I usually always get there around 11.30am. (They also sell Prosecco and light treats, even though they are an award winning espresso bar. In case you didn’t know.) And I loved every single minute of being there, because every soul around you is doing something creative. I was sat next to a guy who was writing poems in a notebook and a girl, with a sketch book, who he didn’t know, who was drawing him.

I LOVE THAT!

And both parties were completely fine with it all, because we’re still Yorkshire. We don’t get worked up over the little things that make people happy.

To my left, was a business man, who was conducting a meeting with a suited GQ looking colleague and they were both in ‘commercial property,’ discussing a ‘closing’ of a deal. I was blogging, hungover in the middle, in my ‘don’t look hungover‘ pinstripe shirt. And if you were following my story, you will have been there with me. (Insta: @chrissiewunna.)

It got really busy at lunch time and that place filled up in minutes. But I already had another place to stop by. So I packed up my pink laptop and tinkered back through into the city. But yes, you all should stop by La Bottega Milanese.

‘A place for networking, relaxing and to be seen.’

You’re drinks are served to you in the most creative manner and the detail and design of the joint is perfection. I go there ALL THE TIME.

My next stop was Issho. Now you all now how much I adore Issho, at Victoria Gate. It’s located in the ‘bouji’ part of the city. You’ll pass Louis Vuitton, Harvey Nics, and everything in between. It’s my favourite Sunday Afternoon ‘roof top terrace’ spot. The place is beautiful, calm, yet busy with a sexy quiet lust, It’s Japanses. Stylish and a haven for a models, glamour pusses, footballers, wealthy families, or the money man…That’s the vibe and whenever I go…I’ll always order a cold sake, which is served to me, in a Japanese clay bowl, filled with ice, to keep it’s temperature correct, at all times.

The staff are the height of exquisite, when it comes to service and they’re also so much fun. I mean I was talking to Jack…(I think it was Jack or was it John? Lol) Anyway, he is originally from Romania, just moved to Leeds, from Manchester, now working at Issho and has been in the city for only 2 weeks. He was telling me how having your own place in a new city is amazing, because you can do whatever you want.

If you wanna walk around naked with a whisky, you can.

Yet being new to a city, on your own is difficult, but only at first, because Leeds is a city where you make acquaintances quickly. It’s not as cold as London, yet there’s still so much to do. But he was going to Everyman’s Cinema with his work colleague, who was also so much fun..Also so much banter..and offered to take me swimming. Lol.

Me: ‘Swimming?’

(You don’t need to take me swimming to see me in a bikini. Just Google my socials. Lol) 

Issho J: ‘Well why don’t you come to the cinema?’

Me: ‘I’m already booked to go next week, for work.’

Bottom line, lots of gentle fun, surrounded by all things stylish and Zen. I could have a Issho Sake now. (What time is it?) Love that palce. You should go.

My last stop was Gino’s. Owned by the delightful Gino D’Acampo. Everybody in the city knows that this is where you will always find me…as it is literally my favourite haunt..and I influence the the glories out of this restaurant/bar. I’ve been to them all over. The staff are hot Italian Gems. I could not get treated better in that place and it is a stylish, but warm, family, friend or date spot, kinda joint. It serves you all and when you’re in there, you FEEL good, like you’re in safe hands.

Probably why I like to go.

The quality of the drinks, service and food is divine. I mean, as soon as I walked in, straight away it’s air kisses, love from the managers and the warmest greetings as I’m  and walked to the bar. i don’t even have to order (I go there so much) and a Prosecco in a frozen glass will appears, in front of me. Immediately, before I even wink, the beautiful Italian lady behind the bar, winks and says,

‘I’ve ordered you the focaccia, breaksticks wrapped in parma ham with pesto and honey drizzled cheese. I know you’ll need a bar snack, you can have them with your drink, to compliment it. 

PERFECT! HOW GOOD IS THAT SERVICE.

Then later, I got talking to Francesco ( Insta: @francesecolapodl) who works behind the bar there…and I loved him because he was such a delight.

Francesco: ‘Where have you just come from?’

Me: ‘Issho…It’s great there.’

Francesco: ‘Is it! I’m looking for somewhere to take my girlfriend on a date. I’m looking for somewhere Asian. We did Sukhothai…

Me: ‘Yeah, I love it there. Issho’s Japanese. So it’s like sushi/sashimi…and lovely. It’s pricey though..’

He *winks*…because that’s  what the Italians do. Oh the charm. I love the charm. Haha. I mean you can’t stop adoring the staff at Gino’s…It’s almost like a perfectly cast show of style, glamour, and Italian family values.

Then with a smirk, he says…(and this part is SOOOO HOT LADIES…..His lucky girlfriend…)

‘I don’t mind pricey. 🙂 The price doesn’t matter to me at all, Chrissie. I work in the industry. I’m happy to pay over and over again. for good food, great service and good times, with my girlfriend.’

Francesco, please marry us all. We girls LOVE IT when guys are hot like that. And it’s not about the date,  or the simple cost of anything..and all about the fact that it’s such a MANLY…GENTLEMANLY…TRADITIONAL way to be. It’s attractive. And all girls find it attractive. He’s the man of his kingdom and can take care of his girl on every level, out of love, respect and good times.

I kinda want to head to Gino’s now too? Lol

Anyway, I know that everyone this evening is going to be hooked on ‘Love Island’ and never venturing out again for the next month. But if you need places to go in Leeds, you should try the above three joints out.. I actually only watched little bits of ‘Love Island’ last year. But i’m gonna make the effort to watch more of it this year…However, I’m not gonna let it effect my social life. Lol. I am still a grown up. I can catch a tv show on repeat. Real life social interactions for always right now.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Boodee, House of Lily & 3 Pumps For You Sir!

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Me: ‘We’ve all got knickers, as in pants on right?’

Cece: ‘Yeah. I’ve definitely got pants on. We’ve all got pants on…She hasn’t though…(Points at girl.) I mean, we’re old. They’re young and don’t where pants. But there was a young girl, who I was fitting, who clearly said she had spanx on.’

Rocker Lily: ‘I’ve got pants on.’

ALL GOOD! SAFETY FIRST!

Now, before I get into all that, as you ALL know that I was at the Boodee Boutique,Influencers Brunch’ on Sunday, at ‘Cuckoo’ in Leeds. My ‘socials’ and inboxes are going CRAZY CRACKERS over it.

I’ve never ever been to ‘Cuckoo’ in my life and I’m known for socialiting cocktail bars like a champion. It’s absolutely new, a tremendous find and it drips with a chilled out, bouji swirl of swag. It’s… COOL. It’s alive. It’s stylish, glamourous, yet not remotely pretentious and you get a free flipping pizza with your drink!

Image may contain: people sitting, drink and indoor Image may contain: shoes

Bartender: ‘Are you wanting the free pizza..?’

Me: ‘Noo, course not. I’m fine. Lol.

Bartender: ‘I didn’t think so, somehow. 😉 ‘

There’s just a vibe in that place… and ‘old school/new school’ vibe and if you were a child of the 80’s/90’s you will find the music deliciously swag. I ‘Pon De Replayed’ it…. like I WAS….. RIHANNA. (Don’t hate. You could’ve *swiggled it* too. In fact, Hit *play* to feel like you were there with me. See! Aren’t I nice to you! 😉 )

But let me take you back…The train into Leeds, was the busiest ‘Bank Holiday’ train of madness ever. It was filled with young gaggles of party boys, older couples, girls and a group of posh Geordies. (I’ve decided that Geordies are everywhere.)

I had begun the day feeling like a bit of a plonker, as it was early Sunday morning and I was strutting around life, petrol stations, Xscape, wine bars and Platform 2’s in a GIANT fluffy PINK faux fur, diamante heels, necklace and head to toe in PINK & WHITE.

I knew, I either looked marvellous or ridiculous because everyone was staring at me…constantly….and so much to the point that I’d started to feel moderately insecure. Lol. That’s why I had a wine, in the nearest bar, which was The Winter Seam, before my train. The problem with me is that I’ll feel ‘all the eyes.’ which it will make me very aware of my existence…It’ll then make me feel a bit ‘wibbly.’ but you would NEVER EVER know because I will strut into a place, IN MY GIANT PINK FAUX FUR, like i’m P.Diddy. (In fact, if Paris Hilton, Ru Paul, P.Diddy had a threesome, and did it whilst eating a bag of prawn crackers…THAT’S what I looked like. 🙂 )

Luckily, I looked less like a dickhead 3 minutes afterwards, because guys in budget  ‘Stag Do’ Hawaiian shirts began drizzling in…and then even they were *trumped* by the casual floral dress  ‘rocker’ lady with the bright blue hair. Then another Geordie appeared out of nowhere, said I was ‘stunning‘ and asked me where I was headed? (Told you, they’re everywhere. They’ve infiltrated Yorkshire. They’ve infiltrated Leeds.)

Me: ‘I’m off to a brunch in Leeds. I’m not just dressed like this for a fry up. Honest…’

He then asked me for my number, after he smirked at my obviously wonderful banter. 😉 So, I did that ‘Chrissie Wunna’ charm face, where I just smile, shrug, slide off my bar stool and laugh it off, like it hasn’t been said, as I giggle out the door.

Next minute I was in Leeds city centre. It was filled with bustle and I didn’t feel as strange anymore as EVERYONE  was dolled up to the heavens and back.

I diamante strutted down the side of the train station, to Call Lane, through busy city streets, car parks, alley ways, puddles, gave a homeless person a light and past a ton of young 20 somethings who were galloping around with excitement….I kinda felt like The Queen of all Leeds, at that point.  Then I walked past ‘Mission’ which reminded me that Zanetti was doing better than Me.

37, Call Lane. I was at ‘Cuckoo.’ The street seemed so quiet, so I carefully tinkered through the door and..

OH MY GOD….

*Camera Flashes, Music, Balloons, Cocktails, Skimpy Dresses, Highest Heels, Giggles, Laughter, Lip Gloss, Selfie Stations, Madness…*

It looked like the most marvellous place on Earth. Literally a Glamour Pusses DREAM. Firstly, it was filled to the brim with the most ‘dolled up‘ beautiful young girls, you will have ever seen in your life…and secondly, as I told you early, the most glamourously ‘cool’ buzz *fast swirled* through that entire place, like wildfire. (And I was only downstairs at first.)

A huge floral wall by ‘Orla Flora’ greeted you….(they’re really IN right now, aren’t they and taking the place of the ‘Media Board’ for a while.) If you have no clue, what I’m on about…. it’s  basically a huge wall made up of flowers, that you picture by, at events…Any event…Weddings, Parties…Whatever….and I LOVE THEM. (I didn’t have my picture taken by the floral wall, whist I was there, because I was too busy drinking and being on the phone to my friend, but I did notice how strikingly beautiful it was.) 

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GIANT PINK bespoke printed balloons (by Instagram @balloonroomx) filled the room, as young influencers and hopeful future influencers selfied, pictured and pouted by them for content..

The balloons were actually really cute, because they were giant and pink, with the words,

‘YOU DO YOU BOO’

..printed upon them.

It was just ace…

So, let me just fill you in. I appeared at the BOODEE BOUTIQUE, ‘Influencers Brunch,’ which is a glamourous afternoon networking event, for all those who are wanting to be ‘Insta Famous,’ an Influencer, a Blogger, Vlogger, those who want to start building their own business or empire, or those who already have….Well, it was a brunch for chicas of that sort…as they could all meet each other, network and at the same time go around the stalls set up by companies & brands (who are currently looking for influencers to promote their lines) and go make themselves known. Pretty much all the brands where looking for ‘the new face of…’ so they were scouting and casting through the crowds of girls. It was dripped in cocktail magic and the dress code was ‘pink & white.’ (And everything about this business, or any business is about MEETING PEOPLE. It is networking.)

Got it?

Cece: ‘Hi, have you been upstairs yet? I saw you walk in. You stuck out like a sore thumb. Here’s a card for House Of Lily. I was just seeing if you wanted to come upstairs and try some of our clothes for pictures….We’re casting for the new face…’

I’m like stood in my pink faux fur, guzzling wine and texting…But there was just something about ‘Cece’ that I loved. It was the fun in her eyes…So I took the card and she disappeared into the crowds.

Then little Baby Doll ‘Charlie C’ (instagram @charliecaitlyn) caught eyes with me and dashed up, with hugs and smiles…(She is as cute as a button and kinda hot as hell.) She pretty much thanked me for coming and within seconds has *whizzed* me upstairs to go and meet everyone….

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Charlie C: ‘I need you to meet Lisa…’

Me: ‘OH! HI! IT’S GREAT TO MEET YOU..’

Charlie C: ‘No…That’s not Lisa…That’s…’

Me: ‘Oh sorry. Hahaha. Nice to meet you anyway…

(We were literally hand in hand, rushing through the crowds of girls….)

Charlie C: ‘Chrissie. Wait here. I need to grab you a candle. It’s a bloggers candle…and you have a gift bag…Here! Take that!….Oh! That’s Lisa…’

Me: ‘Have I just met her downstairs?’

‘Charlie C’ was one of the girls running the event. She’s young, beautiful, Leeds and bubbly and was dashing about like some kind of stunning ‘headless’ chica of ‘ooh laa.’ She did REALLY WELL, as that event was DIVINE. To the point where I even stopped her at the end…to see if she’d throw me an event..

That girl is so young, but so good at what she does..She is the future Queen of Party Leeds.

Anyway, I felt like a glamourous Veteran at the Boodee event, as everyone around me was so young, I’d say from 18 upwards…There were SO MANY GIRLS, all done up and brimming with hopefulness and it was made me realise how many young people in this actual day and age want to be ‘Influencers.’ It’s the new dream job. I can’t believe how competitive it was, well IS and the girls were every INCH stunning.

They were immaculate.

I agree, that they’re all under really great pressure and I can see the pressure on their faces and I agree that it’s such a hard time for them to grow up in, with everything seeming so ‘social media’ perfect. Their stars and inspirations are the popular bloggers, vloggers and Instagrammers of today. And I feel like, they feel as though, they have a lot to try and accomplish, to get to where they want to be. I’m sure it makes them feel insecure, yet it’s the CONFIDENT ONES that smash through the barriers.

(And I can pick those girls right out of a crowd.)

Yet, the thing that made me smile was the fact that RIGHT NOW, INT HIS TIME, being a BLOGGER/Influencer is such a THING.’ When I started my blog 10 years ago in Hollywood...NOT A SINGLE SOUL was blogging, or giving any shits about blogging…People were making FUN OF for writing an online diary….

NOW! It’s one of the MOST LUCRATIVE CAREERS you can have! (IN YOUR FACE!) So firstly, I’m lucky because I accidentally built by blog up over 10 years, so didn’t really have to start from scratch..I did it all the way through my modeling & tv career…Secondly, I’m old….and so to be smashing it about ‘socially’ at 37 is huge, because you just wouldn’t have thought it could happen. But it has.

Anyway, whenever I go to an event, I do the room scan, I chat to everyone I want, I try to meet everyone and then whilst drinking all the cocktails, in all the land, I’ll then just do what I want. 🙂

Me: ‘I kinda just wanna get pissed now..’

I found Lisa, the owner of ‘House Of Lily.’ She was casting for the new faces of her brand. They had a shoot set organised for the girls, who were choosing something to try on, being fitted into it and then being photographed.

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I loved watching the girls, because it reminded me of being young at model casting days. It was far less glam though and I never heard this:

House of Lily: ‘Make sure the girls are tucking their tops in properly…I don’t want any boobs out…’

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I looked through all of ‘House Of Lily’s’ pieces and they were absolutely beautiful. She’s so talented. I mean, tweed fitted jackets, stunning long sequin dresses, patterned jump suits, see through lace Pussy bow blouses….Each piece was so special and so unique…I was in love!  There is so much that is just SO ME from that brand. I’m gonna meet up with Lisa again and take a look through everything properly with her personally, because her line is remarkable and at an event, it’s really difficult after prosecco.

From that point….my afternoon changed. I don’t know what happened, but I kinda brought the *jiggy* (like I do, I mean lets face it, i’m a chip off the ‘Hilton’ brand, I’ve been raised to ‘party’ and do it fucking well.

Me: ‘I need to drink my body weight in wine..’

Rocker Lils: ‘Shall we get sambuca shots.’

Cece: Chrissie, get in an outfit and picture with it please.’

Me: ‘I honestly can’t be bothered to take ALL OF MY CLOTHES OFF at 37, to put them all back on again right now.’

Then fresh wine was poured and our beautiful cup caked, lily vased, booth…turned into a party. 🙂

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So, I basically ‘lowered the tone…’ glamourously of course! Lol.

Me: ‘We’ve all got knickers or pants on right?’

Cece: ‘Yeah. I’ve definitely got pants on.

I ‘d already decided to ‘get comfy,’ at this point, because I loved the girls. I started drinking, and dancing in the booth, and multi tasked it with selfie and videoing taking for my insta/facebook.snapchat stories. ‘PR Lauren’ sat pissing herself at me, in awe. (I went with ‘awe,’ but she was again either staring at me like I was amazing or nuts? You decide.) We might have had a ‘pose off’ also for selfies.

Cece: ‘Look at you. Please tell me it’s real! You have some life. I want it. I want you meet my daughter.’

(She has the most eye catching mixed raced daughter, who floors it in the beauty stakes. I saw a picture of her on her phone and I was blown away.)

Cece: So, you’ve done Playboy….Have you been to mansion and met Hefner?’

Me: ‘Yeah course. Gosh. I wasn’t a *girlfriend,* I modelled for the brand, which is really different…As the *girlfriends* had to pump him. Lol. I think it was something like *3 pumps* and then the next one?

Cece: ‘Hahaha. There’s me thinking he was some kind of Don, when he could only manage 3 pumps and you’re off.’

Me: ‘Well he’s old int’ he and he has to have them ALL pump him, one at a time and watch…I’m sure they were fine with it, it’s only 3 pumps and a weekly allowance. Hahahaha! It was like a grand a week or something.’

Cece: ‘Y’see, I don’t hate on them at ALL for that. A girl’ll do what a girl will do. I’d 3 pump him for that.

Me: ‘Lol. Me too. I just didn’t have the opportunity too. ‘

Cece: ‘Would you?’

Rocker Lils: ‘Noooo, I couldn’t.’

PR Lauren: *BLUSHES*…I don’t know if…’

Rocker Lils: ‘Actually, now I think about it, I might… I’d do more than 3 pumps though. I’m gonna with yeah…

Me: ‘You’d end up bloody married to him!’

And that was the tone of the rest of the evening. It was THE BEST…WE WERE IN FITS OF LAUGHTER and we’re all Yorkshire, so we’re properly down to Earth, don’t care, say whatever we want kinda gals and it’s amazing!

House of Lily: ‘We might have found the girl/girls for the brand….There was one girl that I can’t find…Go find her Cece…’

Cece: ‘Go find her! You go find her. I don’t know what she looks like or where she’s chuffing gone. It’s packed in here. Lol.’

I just LOVE northern bits of tinker…because if I was in LA I would’ve heard…

‘Honey, can you go get me that gurl already.’

If I was in London… They would’ve have been ‘darling darling’ posh.

In Yorkshire, they’re like..

‘For chuffs sake…’

…and I love it.

Literally the most amazing afternoon brunch of wild girly madness….swirled in a fantasy red lighting, with unicorn balloons and giant carousel decor surrounding me.

All the girls that day looked amazing and the all did so fantastically. Well, I hope they did. I hoped they networked well.

I WILL SAY HOWEVER, that I did notice that even though the girls were immaculately beautiful, a lot of the girls did look ‘samey.’ (I actually got told off for saying that out loud. Lol)

Me: They all look the same. I’m trying to scan through the crowd for something different or someone who tries to POP OUT.’ They look the same, but they’re all different girls? And they’re wearing the same…

Cece: ‘It’s a bloody themed dress code you idiot.’

I’m a personality girl and yes, the glam thing always works, it’s part of the job. I do it at 37 and i’ve done it all the way through my teens until now. And being in LA at the time, we took it to the next level. Yet, through that crowd of girls, there needed to be a ballsy, sassy, ‘stand out’ girl, who strutted in, didn’t care what anyone thought, looked amazing, was of great character and someone who was just unforgettable. Someone who oozed so much confidence that she OWNED THAT ENTIRE ROOM…Someone who you spoke to and was completely and utterly taken by!

A STAR! (‘Types’ SMASH IT.)

I did actually see one, but I can’t tell you who… (No, it wasn’t me, you twats…Lol.)

Great night. Ended up going to Gino’s for a quick wine, which was filled with Italian waiters and a suited party of gents who were all talking about boring things like football and how much they reckoned Rugby players got paid. (I watched them and ate pink wafers out my goody bag.)

Got the train home. Slept through my stop. Absolutely fucking nightmare. (A little lovely Geordie lady nudged me away with a ‘Petal’ and I shocked up with a ‘OH SHIT!!!’ She just smiled and like a Guardian Angel solved all my life problems…Told you, they’re everywhere.)

I ended up having to walk for ages, in my giant pink faux fur and as soon as I got home, I collapsed in a heap on my bed.

Hope you had a phenomenal Easter! Thank you for following my life. Thank you for following my ‘socials.’

Two days and I fly to Spain.

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