Breakups, Puddings & Messages…

Last night was fun!! It started with work and quiet moments of blogging. I had half a Peroni, as my merry bit of company. I usually always order that if i’m at my local pub. I don’t even know why? It’s just easy. I’d worked all day. I’d juggled the kids. Mcdonalds got the better of me. (Who knew that they did ‘table service’ now?)

Then an hour zoomed by, at the speed of light.

My pink laptop slammed shut and as the late afternoon kicked in, I sat with friends and just let life take over. Sometimes, that’s all you need to do and I usually hate it when people try to ‘fight the feeling.’ It means they’ve lost their sense of child like ‘adventure.’

My favourite time, is when day turns to night….It’s even better over a tipple.

(I always want to be proposed to, when day turns to night. The reason for that, is simply because it’s such a sexy part of the day for me. It feels really real. It’s exciting, but chilled, all at the same time.)

So, I’m working a lot right now, so i’m making sure I fit in family, rest and fun with friends, whenever I can, really? Today was meant to be quite busy. Yet, I have the whole of Eat Leeds, next week…So I switched things around to chill with the babies today.

IT’S BEEN A STRESSY ONE & NO ONE IS THROWING ME A BONE.

But, next week I’ll be kitty tottering to almost every single swanky bar/restaurant in Leeds city centre. I’m certainly gonna need a good litter of energy for that.

I’m excited through! Who wouldn’t be!! I’m lucky.

Last night was a good time. It was filled with laughter. The bantery kind. Where people were put together to just have some fun! I’m having lots of good times recently. Leeds, last week, was a really good time. My moments of escapism, are always filled with pleasure.

It started off with KatyP and I rambling on to ‘Golfer Jonny’ about how we could never EVER be in a SEX LESS relationship. And I really couldn’t, I’d DIE. I’m no ‘nympho.’ I’m far more in control than that. Yet, when I fancy a guy, ‘Ooooooooooooooh’ do I fancy him…So if I ever have an ‘object of my desire,’ he is usually in for a treat. 😉

At 37, I LOVE a bit of nookie.  I’m a fully grown girl. I love my body and I love to give love and feel loved in return. So, if I had a partner and we’d decided to shimmie through life together, under a flag reading ‘FOREVER.’ I’d chose one with a ‘sexy disposition.’ I’d want him to be in to a bit of the ‘ooh laa.’

I was sat with a guy friend, who was waiting for his bets to roll in, as he showed me pictures of a cocktail, a salsa dancer and a bottle of wine , on his laptop.

Dude: ‘Did you think I did a good job?’

Me: ‘Yeah, yeah.’

Then Ms.Derry (who I adore) sauntered in, with KatyS, on the hunt for a pudding. Who honestly hunts for pudding??? Haha. The lost third course!! They crack me up!

I mean, they got their pudding, after searching MILES for a bit of cake.

‘We’re just three course girls and Electric theatre wouldn’t give us a pudding. We even went to Ego, but we were too late there. So we ended up here.’

(I love Northern girls. ‘Derry’ got chocolate cake and custard. Then fed it to my guy friend, who had initially mocked her pudding choice. I do love custard, but I hate a passing spoon feed, because i’m a total germaphobe. The worst thing anyone could do, is share a spoon. Lol It’s like when people suck a lolly and pass it on to another being for a suck. It’s awful. I’d die.) 

Ms.Derry’s  now fresh and single, after ‘pieing off’ a fifteen year relationship. But the great thing about her is,  that just like ‘Firmonnell’ and I…she’ll simply get on with the next chapter merrily, with a smile and a wink, without moaning.

She’s a fun one and she’s amazing and like we were saying last night, if you are a boy, who is ‘VANILLA,‘ dashed in bland, then we’re far too tasty for ya! Lol. Yet, it’s always the tasty girls, that the boys chase. 😉

My guy friend, sat and learnt about chicks pretty fast…

It’s weird, because this year…has been a year of BREAKUPS. I’ve kinda loved it, as NOW, so many new people are crossing paths and so many new people, now have the opportunity to give a fresh version of life, a go!

A new start is always wonderful!

(People who don’t like them are only scared.) 

Then just as ‘Derry’ was talking about my love life and saying..

Derry: ‘You’ll get it right, the next time around..’

Me: ‘Yeah! Yeah! I’ll definitely get married again, in the future. I’ll get it right, in the end.’

Derry: ‘You’re always so secretive about your relationships.’

…my phone *pinged* and ‘Firmonnell’ (who is my BEST chick friend of all time) starts a Snapchat banter. We enjoy to take the piss out of each other and like I always say, we’re not lame nor basic. We’re not chicks who cry into gin, take warm bubble baths to solve life problems and braid each other’s hair to Kylie tracks.

We’re successful, sassy hotties. Lol. When we chat…WE CHAT and it is GIRL BOSS BANTER.

Executive suites for everyone!

Unfortunately for me, my guy friend grabbed my phone, and started replying to ‘Firmonnell’ ….pretending to me.

People love to do that! But I don’t know why?? Lol

She knew it wasn’t me anyway, as soon as he referred to her as ‘HUN.’ (We would NEVER EVER, relate to each other as ‘HUN.’ We’re not dickheads. Lol)

Me: ‘You should’ve gone with Yo… BITCH.’

She knew when it WAS ME however, as whenever I mentioned a guy that I swirled with, she would give me her blunt sassy answers of ‘nada, no go.’

Me:’ He said he wanted to….’

Firmonnell: ‘He said that five years ago and still hasn’t…Lol’

Then she slagged my guy friend off, to my pretending to be me’ guy friend..because she knew my guy friend, was not actually me. (If you got that, you’re some kind of genius.)

It probably made him die inside a little.

I NEARLY DIED, a little. Lol

Me: ‘I really didn’t say that about you..Lol’

Friend: ‘Well at least I know the truth.’

Yet, let’s refrain from going on my phone and trying to tackle Big Girl banter, because YOU WILL get roasted!! Lol.

It was so much fun. Firmonnell messaged me this morning literally PISSING HERSELF, because she called my guy friend..

‘POOR, AND TOO MUCH.’

Hahaha.

OH LORD!!!

What is my life! No wonder I’m always fucking single!

So many options. Not one of them ever fits. Lol

But other than messing up a phone audition this morning, I don’t have anything else to report. I’ve just had fun with  my dad and the babies, today.

I’m annoyed that I messed up my audition, because it’s something that i’d really be good at. Something that I want. But I was sat in my car, half in pyjamas, half in a pin stripped shirt, whilst listening to an echo on the phone…and I just…Well, I could’ve done better than that!

Let’s hope, I get another shot!

Chrissie x

 

 

 

All four of us.

When I did Issho..

Image may contain: Chrissie Wunna, sitting and indoor

I’m having the best time and living the best life, right now. I feel amazing, like my world is a marvel. Yet, it’s only because I’ve come a long way and when you do, you tend to appreciate the ‘good times’ a little more, don’t you? I’m just enjoying life, embracing it (the only way I know how) and when your work is cocktailing and city life, nothing could be more delicious.  I’m the luckiest girl in the world. I mean, we’re all doing our own version of life on this giant Earth Ball. This is just my story..and I chose to share it with you, via a diary.

Thank you so much for following it…

D’ya know what’s been great? I’m managing to fit in a lot of family time (schools out for Summer & I’m a single mum of two) and that alone, makes my little kitten heart melt. Ruby, Junior & I are SO close & even though we might not have everything, on a superficial level, we have everything that matters.

And that ‘everything that matters’ keeps us strong as a family. We wind each other up, but do everything with love.

So, I tottered into Issho, Leeds on Friday afternoon, simply because I fancied a wee bit of sake and a couple cheeky *winks* of Asahi on the roof terrace. (This was after a guy showed me the content of his Jack Willis rucksack…I actually can’t remember what was in it, other than ONE shoe insole. Lol) 

Dude: ‘I’m prepared for anything, me.’

Issho, is one of my favourite haunts. I do go there quite a lot. Yet, I love it because even though it’s certainly one of the most popular venues,  in the city, it’s still magnificently divine, as the art of Zen swirls around you, at the same time as a vibe of utter ‘coolness.’

The place is literally beautiful…and being a child of the Orient, I’ll go where the finest sake in all the land is delivered.

In my old age, 😉 I like peace and there’s certainly a peacefulness to the place. ..and if you know me personally, you’ll know that when I do decide to tinker my kitten self, for a couple of afternoon drinks…I adore nothing more than the finer things in life, yet total, calm, enlightenment. Lol

BLISS

To me, it’s a haven, where I can have a quiet, yet ultimately stylish drink (or 7) with friends…

Everyone watches my stories on my ‘socials’ and thinks i’m there alone. Just so you know, i’m never anywhere alone. I enjoy my own company, for sure…But there’s usually ALWAYS someone with me.

I love to share moments…It makes memory making come alive.

I tottered in around 12.30, I’d say..and as soon as I did, I was greeted by the warmest bar staff, a hostest, with a beam and the manager, who couldn’t have been more delightful.

I’m a service girl and it doesn’t matter where you go, or what you do, you want to feel special, don’t you? You want to feel remembered and you want to feel like the people around you at that time, are so happy to have you there. You want to feel appreciated. That is literally human nature. We want to feel special always, in general life and not only in bouji cocktail bars.

I got that immediately…and being the attention seeker that I am…It felt marvellous.

I got to hug ‘my boys,’ the bartenders, who couldn’t do more for me, if they tried. They’re so much fun and they deliver the finest warm banter, that I kinda feel like I know them so well.

The service all around was DIVINE. It was first class, top rate, and without any prompting on another level.

They went out of their way to make everyone feel wonderful and that alone is magic.

I always watch the staff at the places that I go, as I know they have it hard, their lives are ‘busy busy’ at work. I also watch the people around me and there is not a single time, that I have tottered up that Victora Gate spiral staircase, to Issho ( I actually took the elevator to the 3rd floor Lol)…where they haven’t gone above and beyond, naturally, without complaint, to make me feel goddessy.

They’re so friendly and so warm, they radiate an image of calm.

I like that. I mean, who wants to go somewhere ‘Zen,’ by blossom trees, if the staff are pulling faces lol. Plus, with the food being such a marvel and the venue nesting in the best part of the city centre, they tend to bring in some tremendous clientele. Ofcourse,  adore a place like that, yet you would too,  simply because of the way they make you feel.

(I will say that my friend DID get attached to a tree at one point. Lol. Yet, after a couple of Asahi’s, that happens anyway. 😉 )

Me: ‘Do you want some of my sake.’

Friend: ‘Noooo. I’m still hungover. That will knock me out.’

Great conversations happened that day. Y’know, the kind of conversations where you talk for hours, about every inch of your life. Then you laugh about your troubles, with no judgement.

I think we intended on having ONE drink.

Friend: ‘I’m having this ONE, then I really have to go…’

Yet, as the story goes…we as humans, just love ‘good, good times’ and most normal humans will go ahead and embrace them, (even when we get grief for enjoying life) because gosh, we all go through so much stress on a daily, that if we don’t hold onto the lovely moments, we’d always feel stiff, narky and controlled on inside.

I love anybody that commits to the art of…

‘Shall we have one more..’

It shows me that you’re free…and freedom is sexy.

I talked about my love life. I peeked over the city, from the glorious roof terrace. I chatted with the bat staff and manager a little more. (I literally kept hugging everyone..and I’m not a usual ‘hugger.’ Issho just makes me feel warm…and when you’re SO gratetful for all that they do…You’re gonna glitter out a bit of Wunna Land love.)

The food is amazing, the drinks are wonderful, the service is IMPECCABLE. It is certainly on my list of favourite places and I’ve been all over the world for a couple afternoon drinks.

How something makes you FEEL, is literally what makes something worth it. We judge things based upon the way it makes us feel.

We value our feelings, more than anything, without even noticing. That’s how we KNOW we’re in bad situations, relationships…or anything in between.

Yet, on the up, that’s also how we know we’re happy! So if I could give you any advice today, it would be to pay attention to the things that make you happy, as they are key to your next life steps, and vital to your story.

Issho. I love you. I can’t wait to see you again.

Chrissie x

 

 

 

 

 

Girl Besties, Busy Times & An Offer Of Friendly Dinner

Busy, busy times. I’m working. The children are working. There’s a great deal to tango through and we’re all doing it with a smile on our faces. I love being busy. It’s when I shimmie at my finest. So there’s not one second of this period, that i’m not at all grateful for. I’m feeling pretty blessed. But there’s a mountain to climb. Technically in heels, it’s not that easy a strut. However, and as always, i’m shaking off the stress and doing my version of life, the best way I know how.

Late nights of Summer fun are now over. I’ve tickled really hard quiz nights with Sheffield Greg, had long chats with little Tyler, over Rhubarb and Custard ciders. Tyler’s great because he’s only 18, but he’s so emotionally together, after probably going through an awful lot, that I have all the time in the day for him.

I’ve cut away from debauchery and all things that end in naughty. right now. Plus, if i’m being honest, I’m kinda pretty focused, and it’s serving me well.

FINALLY!

Most of all, I’ve had the most amazing chats with my girl bestie ‘Firmonnell.’ I spent the morning filming, shooting, and in between sharing banter snaps with the chick that knows me, far better than I know myself. I also had a quick audition this morning…So hopefully that worked out well.

Yet, anyway, ‘Firmonnell’ and I are both in a good place and when we are….

We are on fire!

Firmonnell: ‘How you feeling today? Maybe it’s the right time now?’

Me: ‘Should I send a message? I’ll send a message. I’ve sent the message….Shit! He’s typing back.’ 

I don’t like the loss of good people in my life, so I always tend to treasure the good’uns and keep that bridge a ‘flourish.’ I only checked in. But to me, ‘checking in’ matters. I like it when people ‘check in’ on me. Especially through busy spots, as it makes me realize (through the bustle and the rush) that there are always folk who care. The people who’ll take a minute to think about you and whizz you some ‘love.’ (Even when you’re a swine, to them.)

It’s thoughtful and thoughtfulness is the new sexy.

Then as I was filming, my phone pinged and I noticed an Facebook inbox message, *ping* up. I never really notice them, as to be honest, my inbox is ‘ping‘ filled to the brim, almost every single minute, second and wink.

But anyway, I’ve clicked onto it…which hardly ever happens, with my Facebook messages…and I’d noticed that this person had recently followed me on all my ‘socials’ and ‘liked’ a few pics. (Always a good way to make yourself noticed.)

And then I read…

The most lovely picture message came through, of himself and his son. Followed by a voice message, a brief written message and another voice message, which gave me the option of adding his contact to my phone.

Now, this happens a lot. Yet, it was done SO WELL and with such grace, that I stopped for a second and well…it’s the ‘social’ age, I stalked all his pics. Lol.

His voice messages were filled with love, not smut. They were sponged with kindness and humility…instead of banter or cheekiness. He wasn’t scared to be himself, and didn’t try to force a charm.

And I listened…

(Then I messaged ‘Firmonnell’ because that’s what I do…as I was filming…and as I was signing papers that could change parts of my career. Lol)

I can’t really tell you much about it, as it only happened this morning. And I can’t really tell you too much about what ‘Firmonnell’ and I said to one another, because you wouldn’t be able to quite take the banter, just yet, if you didn’t know how close we actually are. Lol.

Our banter is for our ears only. Lol

Then we talked through our current states of ‘love life.’ We’re both single…so as girls do, we’ll ‘exchange,’ stories quietly…

Anyway, I guess he’d like to take me out on an ‘if i’m interested, friendly dinner.’ He’ll be FLYING OUT. However, no one needs to get their knickers in a twister just yet, as I only read the message this morning. Plus, it wouldn’t be just yet, right away, within a blink of an eye, as he’s currently on holiday, before the season kicks in.

Anyway, I got back to filming and sorting out all that I’m needing to influence. I’m in Leeds tomorrow afternoon, or is it morning?

Yet, if I could pass of any words of wisdom right now, it would be to LIVE, (as it always is.) Adventure. Take chances. Never get stuck in a rut. Embrace everyone human you meet and enjoy your time with them. Moments with them could change your life. They also couldn’t…and everything could stay the same. Yet, just in case…it’s key to keep your mind open, fresh and willing.

You can think about people, the past or a situation…and if it’s meant to be, in the end, life will force you to cross paths again. The ones that love you will always stand by you. They’ll always make the effort to care. Yet, sometimes good things fall apart, so better things can fall into place.

Enjoy it.

Have faith it life. Have faith in love. Have faith in your story…and the rest will ‘jigsaw fit.’

Tomorrow…Leeds. (I fancy Issho)

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Life, Love & Sports Day

Image may contain: Chrissie Wunna, standing

Morning! Morning! I hope you’re all well. Thank you so much for taking the time to click into Wunna Land. I appreciate it madly. It makes a little oriental chick, from Yorkshire smile. When you make someone smile, they say it comes back to you threefold..with love. (Sometimes, it comes back to you via gin. Either way…you’re looking at a bonus.) 

Over the last couple days, i’ve been pretty stressed. Just wallowing around in it for attention. Lol.  I could hand pity parties out of my pocket right now. 🙂  I’ve laid awake in bed, staring at my ceiling at 2am, because that solves everything, doesn’t it. 😉 I’ve downloaded a meditation app, (the ‘Breethe’ app…) which I do actually think is great. I’m quite a spiritual little swine. (I’m not ‘hippie/save the trees‘ with it though. Just in tune with my tender kitten soul… and all that.) I have quite a busy mind and it needs to be calmed. Maybe that’s why i enjoy a good drink. It quietens the mind madness for a while….well, before I start drunk messaging. 😉

If i’m being honest, I’ve been feeling under pressure because of this book i’ve got to write. My fear of writing this book is so immense that i’m kinda letting everything bundle on top of me, which is an odd way for me to deal with the situation, as I really don’t like the art of bundling. It’s clumsy. I’m sharp. Why am I buffooning about?

But away from that…(as she pretends it’s not happening..)

Yesterday I learnt how precious LIFE is. How important LOVE is. How vital it is to make sure all the people you care about, all the people you love, all the people you forgot to show love to KNOW, HOW MUCH they mean to you.

Life’s really short and within a *blink* it whizzes past you, or even worse get’s taken away from you, without your consent. Basically, if the only problem I have, is the fact that i’m stressing over writing some book, then on the whole i’m pretty lucky lady. I need to pull myself together. I’m being a baby.

Let’s frisbee back to positive…

Life’s pretty great at the moment. I’m happy. I’m not skin to the wind ‘buzzing,‘ but i’m certainly grateful and filled with ‘ooh laa.’ I feel pretty strong and even though I seem to have prioritized work over my social life, I’ve prioritized my family, as in the babies, over everything right now and it’s made me feel really powerful.

I love to keep things simple and loving unconditionally is the easiest thing in the world to me. When I operate in such a way, i’m magic.

Wednesday was great. The kids had Sports Day and I got to catch up with the school mums. (We’re all busy women, who hardly ever get to check in with each other and they’re such a lovely bunch, so it’s always really awesome.) Our kids go to a local Private school in West Yorkshire. I never used to be able to show up to things like Sports Day, or any of the school ‘dilly dallies,‘ due to work.

Yet now, I can. I now never EVER miss anything they do, at all…EVER!!! It means so much to me. More importantly it means SO much to them.

It makes my entire world go around.

Unfortunately, I showed up with some dodgy giant umbrella…It was the size of my entire body…and blue. Urgh! (I don’t like blue, it’s my least favourite colour. My favourite colour is yellow. I like a yellow rose.)

Anyway, when anyone lends me an umbrella, they can never give me a normal flipping shot at life…The last umbrella I borrowed had giant happy PIGS on it and no one can *BOSS* that out, even when the pigs look moderately chipper.

It was the sunniest, most humid day ever. Didn’t even rain. Lol. Don’t know why I thought it was gonna rain, must be the optimist in me? 😉 Luckily, ‘Miss Murphy‘ showed up with a dense floral blanket, which kinda lightened the blow..

Miss.Murphy: ‘I think i’ve illegally parked, in front of some gates??’

Me: ‘It’ll be ‘right.. Lol.’

We rocked up, everyone was already there and well I thought we were moderately organised…

Me: ‘We’re fine, between us we have a giant umbrella, a floral blanket and a faux fur..’

(What more could you need in life?) 

The other Mums had brought things like…. fold up chairs, happy faces, husbands, snacks… and ‘Bobby’ (who had spent the morning filming ‘Victoria’) even brought a flipping POP UP TENT, like we were at Creamfields!

Bobby: ‘Get in it then..’

Me: ‘Nah…You’re alright. Lol.’

She’s a nutter, but I love her. She makes my eyes smile. She’s ACE. I think she may have asked to lick ice creams and told lonely fathers that she was spending the rest of the day…nude.

(I’d never seen a gentleman beam as much.)

The day was great. It was just filled with that good old, real life excitement. I mean, Miss Murphy, Bobby and I may have brought the worse accessories, between us. However our *yells* of competitive encouragement , surely made our style misfortunes, okay?

Let’s just say we weren’t about the ‘taking part‘ and all about THE WIN. Hahaha. (Which is fine if you’re ‘Murphy’ and you’ve birthed some five year old sporting champion. Junior spent the day holding his teachers hand and making her run races with him.) 

Mumma P: ‘To make the Wunna Babies TRY to win anything, you have to have a modelling contract, gifts, or a selfie opportunity at the finish line, so they can at least make it worth their while. Lol’

Me: ‘Yeah..Lol. Ruby did ask me what she would get if she won the races and when I said house points for your team, she just looked at me like I was an idiot. Haha.’ 

BBQ’s, Ice creams and good clean fun occurred and you need spurts of good clean fun, don’t you? I’m kinda loving life right now. I’m feeling all grown up. I’m no longer selling myself short. I’ve got my career on track and I’m chipper.

If you’ve been following any of my ‘socials,’ you’ll know that I received a bunch of messages the other day, from a couple of beings who kept branding me as ‘fake.’ 

I’m polite. But I’m not fake. I get why you may think that though. Yet, let me tells you… I’m literally the warmest little piece of Burmese bunkin’ you’ll ever really run into. It’s only because you haven’t had the delightful pleasure of meeting me in person. 🙂 If you did know me personally, you’d go with ‘immature.’ 😉  You might even add in a ‘beautiful.’ 😉

My chick friends go with ‘dickhead.’ Firmonnell (who is one of my closest chick friends,) called me a ‘dickhead’ at least 9 times in the space of 4 messages yesterday. She had a needy Thursday. 🙂 I love her. I love it when she’s mad at me. Nothing pleases me more. And she can’t just shout at me once, she has to Snapchat Filter shout at me, 40 times in a row and I just can’t take it seriously…All I do is piss myself laughing…which winds her up more.

Then I bumped into ‘Hustle,’ who needed a wee at ‘Ego.’ She walked past me, whilst telling me that her love life was shit and her last date ‘pied her off’ after stealing money out her purse. To make it even better…She actually saw him again and went on another date. I love that about ‘Hustle’ like me, she’s resilient. (Code for: Were both so, so foolish.)

Oh wait? No. He didn’t pie her off. The ‘Date in the woods’ dude, did? (Hahaha…and she’s gonna kill me for saying this…) But she thinks he didn’t want to speak to her again, because she may have accidentally pooed her pants. Lol.

HAHAHAHAHA. I’M DYING. That’s disgusting. Lol.

I love how she wonders why he stopped messaging? It’s only funny because she’s so beautiful. I’m so delighted she may have excreted in her own jeans.

We always get pied.

With me, I’m a ‘grower.’ I’m someone who may catch your eye initially…Then you’ll judge me and decide to not like me…..Then you’ll have a little think, date far less awesome chicks and realize i’m actually the girl of ya dreams. 😉

God! How long was this blog? Lol. Sorry!

Chrissie x

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Tequila Shots, Flirts & The End of Wedding Season

Image may contain: 1 person, smiling

So, we head into Rogerthorpe Manor for the reception dinner. Lead by a guy in a Gucci tie, who everyone thought was a guest. He wasn’t, he was the ‘Master of Ceremonies’ I guess? Is that what he was? I don’t know? He was lively and witty, let’s say. However Laura, Toby & I still managed to make fun of him every half hour, because he kept skipping out of nowhere…a doorway, a table, a bush…and scorning us politely, for not being at the right place, at the right time…at least he did it in Gucci.

Gucci Tie: ‘It’s the speeches now…So you all need to get back inside.’

Me: ‘It’s not the speeches yet. I’ve just spoke to Guy & Neil…and LOOK, they’re all the way up the garden, by that dodgy stone woman.’

(There was the most hilarious giant woman made of out stone in the garden. She was half naked, shoulder crouching & holding part of a robe in front of her, to cover her modesty…YET SHE LOOKED TERRIFIED. Like Jackie Chan was gonna hurtle out the trees naked and Kung Fu her. Or like Toby was about to sell her a car. 😉 ) 

Anyway, I was sat on a different table to Laura & Toby. For once, I wasn’t on the naughty table. I think I was on the ‘some of us are single’ table. Everyone was  talking about diggers and how exciting they found Power Plants though, so it confused me. Then at least convo ‘sexed’ up a bit, when they boobs took the focus.

All polite. All such fun. Don’t really rememebr anyone’s name. But I do know that someone was German, two people were single….and they all love Guy whenever he gets naked in pubs? Hilarious table. Filled with smut. They couldn’t have welcomed me more. To my left was a gent, who had been Guy’s ‘Best Man’ twice before, yet didn’t get the ‘role of’ this time around. Lol.

AWKS! Hahaha.

Then the day turned to dusk as the traditional comedy speeches were being made…and we all ventured back outside onto the lawn for more drinks. The sun was shining. The sky was still blue. You need fresh air at weddings, because that’s what keeps you alive! It’s like I started the day again…Yet maybe that was the gin…

Laura: ‘Right now, I could put my tracksuit on, some flats, tie my hair on top of my head…and just chill in the sun…with this gin. I got you one too..’

Me: ‘Awww! Thank you! That creepy, stone woman is urking me out.’

Then people whopped out the cigars…

Toby: ‘He looks like a Don.’

More drinking was going on…I kinda left Vicki to do the wedding rounds, like you must! I met the rest of her family, mid gin though and I loved that! I mean, I adore little Estelle and have known her anyway. But I got to meet her sons…Ben & Andy…and Ben’s chick, who was dressed in red and I love a girl who rocks a red dress.

Excitement must have got the better of us…

Someone told us that the music had been turned on, so I tinkered on in armed with my new East London crew…Lol…and Let’s just say Toby, Laura & I, got the party started. Well, we just inappropriately *bumped* and *grinded* to whatever the DJ was playing, whilst forcing him to ‘turn it up, turn it up’ and watching Page Boys ‘Floss’ and Bridesmaids ‘Hair toss.’

We were drinking our through it….But I still didn’t feel pissed yet? And when i’m at a wedding, I want to be pissed.

At this point, things ‘wilded’ up…Everyone still looked beautiful. ‘Bobby’ (Roberta) had shown up, out of the blue, in blue, looking stunning and not wearing knickers….

‘Chrissie look under her dress and see if she has any knickers on…’

(I love ‘Bobby’ because she’s a wild one like me. She didn’t know if she had an official invite. She just watched my Insta story, got dressed and rocked up. Hahaha! She LIVES! I mean, you’ll find ‘BobbyShe’ll be naked. Not care…and you’ll have to deal with it. She does the Wunna Land ‘Live life/YOLO Ting’ and it’s bliss. You’re only here once. If you’re lucky, you’ve got 100 years to just enjoy being alive.)

Andy’s now buying me Tiger Beers, because I was Asian and he fancied me a bit Lol. Toby & Laura disappeared for a few…and I’m sure they went for a quick ‘moment‘ upstairs. 😉  Yet, they assured me that no such ting happened. They were apparently looking for me, everywhere…

Andy: ‘Do you think, I have a chance with her…’

Laura: ‘No…lol’

The wedding was great and the dance floor filled. A giant, fun photobooth with props had been set up, so ‘Bobby’ and I smashed it THREE TIMES, because we’re the Ultimate Queen of Selfie and i grumbled a bit, because it moved too fast for my Insta story. Haha.

Then I don’t know what happened, but Andy, Ben, His Red Dressed Girlfriend, Laura, Toby and I…ended up at the faaaaaaar end of the bar, a little away from everyone, kinda by the buffet…The lights had been dimmed, so it was officially night time…and Toby goes…

‘Are we having shots then…?’

And in this time…What Happened! It turned from beautiful time, on the most beautiful grounds, at the most beautiful wedding…to a party episode of Geordie Shore….(Even though no one was or is a Geordie???/ I’m so good at this! I need the sack.) 

We SHOT everything. Chick shots. Dude shots. Shots, from each other shots. Shots, OFF EACH OTHER shots…The Guys were shooting Tequila in the end and sucking the lemons out of each other mouths.

EWWW! 

( I say ‘sucking,’ which makes it sound more aggressive, than it was…When I actually watched my intsa story back, it looked someone loving. Andy cradled Toby’s head, like he was Mother Mary.)

Then out of nowhere, in the name of a DARE. Army Ben, at Toby’s suggestion…does a Tequila shot, but he doesn’t lick the salt, he SNIFFS THE SALT UP HIS NOSE, SHOOTS THE SHOT AND THEN SQUEEZES THE GODDAMN LEMON IN HIS GODDAMN EYE!!! 

OUCH!!!!!!!!

It was brilliant. I was so entertained. It made my life complete.

Toby: ‘I was giving them a £100, but I think I might pull out a tenner for shots and give them £90 instead. Hahaa.’

Then just like magic, we all went onto chill mode and I sat outside chatting to Vicki’s lovely Irish Mummy. She looked like the most glamourous Irish Mummy in the world. I loved her. She was funny, polite, yet I could see a ‘sassy’ in her eyes. I loved her!

Then like ya do…I think I went on a massive ‘Preach’ mode and forced everyone to listen to me tell them how much I loved Vicki.

A really drunk Yorkshire lady sat down and started banter…I loved her, because she was so ‘tell it how it is.’ 

Toby: ‘Where has she been all night! She’s great!!’

And then towards the end of the night, I finally got to spend some time with the Bride…

We just heard ‘CAKE,’ held hands and found it…

Vicki: ‘Lemon or Fruit cake’

Then we laughed. He danced. We talked over the day, with smiles. She was the most BEAUTIFUL BRIDE, in all the land and i’m not even kidding. Vicki’s ‘40 something‘ and she LOOKED 20 SOMETHING STUNNING.

Then i might have had to fight off a few lovely gents… 😉 I’ll say no more. Hahah.

And the funniest thing…as more time passed, more drinks were had…and more celebrations were turned into memories to share the day that Guy & Vicki committed to being ‘life partners…’

When I eventually walked out of the main doors at Rogerthorpe Manor, the LAST SENTENCE, that I said, (well this was after a ‘Thank you’ and ‘Cya’…)

The LAST SENTENCE that flew out of my mouth, was…

‘No…I’m not going to sit on your willy….’

Hahaha…

Such a great time. I send both Guy & Vicki all my love. I made some really great new friends…and I’m so lucky and honoured to have been there.

Definitely lost my bank card. (When that happens, you know shit got messy.)  Toby & Laura and now in Jamaica…And today….We Start the World Cup! Lol.

Thank you following my life…

Chrissie x

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I’ll Tells You What I Fancy In GUYS…..

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Hope you’re having the most beautiful Thursday! Going well for you? I truly hope so. You all deserve a bit of love, luck and happiness. And thank you so much for finding you way to Wunna Land. It’s utterly much appreciated.

I’m quite dandy today and I don’t really know why? But i’m kinda brimming over with the ‘joy joys’ and I love it when that happens, because it’s such a great feeling. It fills my sorry ass soul with light.

You won’t know this, but every morning in Wunna land, Ruby, Junior  (my babies) and I are woken up by a hand picked song, that plays and fills each room in the house. I believe it puts us all in a good mood. I’m a huge music lover. And even if you’re hungover, it’s ace, because it makes you think the party is still going on.

Today’s choice was by my five year old, Baby Junior and it was this…So i’m gonna put it on for you, so you can feel today’s vibe…

*Hit Play Now.*

Then KatyP sends me a whatsapp message stating that we should pack up boxes of super strength dildos, make sure the boxes are labelled ‘SUPER STRENGTH DILDOS‘ and drop them outside each of our friends doorsteps.

KatyP: ‘Claire would expect it to be full. Lol.’

Me: ‘It’s fine, we can just chuck in a couple of kitchen knives and say it’s bondage or summat.’

KatyP: ‘We’ll put a soap on a rope in there too..’

Me: ‘And a teddy to cuddle, for after the ordeal.’

Then she gave me a list of Adult Cereals that went along the lines of ‘Fifty Shades of Grain/Special D/Porn Flakes/Rice Friskies’ that I could consider munching, as  I’m actually a breakfast skipper. (I just do coffee and selfie taking and yeah lol…it’s really bad for your system. You should always have breakfast.) My favourite was ‘Cheery Hoes.‘ So if I do ever consider eating before 9am…

They’d be my first choice of delight.

Away from that, I loved Love Island last night. I still fancy Adam. I don’t know why some people don’t. He’s far too attractive to not adore and his personality, to me… is on point. Like I don’t care if he’s sweet, but egotistical, kind, but cocky…In general, I love that in a guy. I love a guy with ‘gusto.’

Y’know, when they know what they want and how to get it. It not only means they’ve used their brain, yet also learnt along the way of life…and studied girls with a sly carefulness. I don’t mind a guy who fancies himself as a bit of charmer, but only when it’s executed well.  I like ‘smooth’ not cheeky. Cheeky is young. ‘Smooth’ is grow ass man. I like a soft gentleman, mixed in with a delicious roaring swag. I go for sexy. I love sexy.

It’s hot.

I still fill as though the Doctor is gonna get pied off by Rosie, ‘The Solictor’ though. I mean, she used date Jordan Weekender…which means she’s gonna swoop on in for MY ADAM. Haha. Hurrah!! Poor Alex.

I had ace chats about this with my chickadee Zara (who works at Creator Hair in Sheffield) late last night. I think we decided we loved each other and then decided that all men were twats.

Why are they though? We’re proper catches!

Then we talked about cougars and how every young guy goes through his ‘cougar phase.‘ I’m not agest by any means. I can’t afford to be emotionally. Lol.

However, I’ve always ended up with a toyboy. I don’t know whether that’s because i’m the oldest girl in the world, living a young life or because I’ve never found an older man, (apart from ONE..who is my mate ‘Trigg’ who i find extremely attractive. I mean, for 42, he’s a looker. You should stalk his Insta: Simon T Trigg. It’s a grow up girls treat.)

Me: ‘I don’t think a 20 something guy would ever really  seriously consider being with a 30 something yr old girl…long term..’

Zara: ‘You’d be surprised…’

Me: ‘I just don’t think, they’d look to settle down with someone quite a bit older, in the end…It’s just a phase for them. Yeah, we’re by far better women, all grown up, no drama and better in bed…

Zara: ‘When you’re in Sheffield at the end of the month. I know you’ll already have somewhere to stay, but feel free to stay at mine. Oh shit. Wait. And that’s not because you’ve just said you’re good in bed. Hahahahahahaha. 

I love Zara. She’s ace. When she first met me, (at the Weaves & Waves event in Leeds, she came with Sam etc) she didn’t like me and was certainly unsure, then hours in… she thought I was okay and finally, at the very end of the night, she decided she did. I literally love her.  I find her funny, she makes my evil soul fill with laughter. She’s a good find. Aw! Yeah and I saw that Sam BURNT HIS HEAD with straighteners today on his Insta story…

‘Mr. Assured Chrissie Wunna, that HE NEVER BURNS ANYTHING, whilst doing hair.’  

All he did was emoji piss himself at me…then got on with life.

(Ooh, i’ve just got a message in from ‘Firmonnell.’ She’s one of my chick besties,  but she’s in France..camping. Once sec, let me see what she’s got to say, because I miss her…)

It was a snapchat of her face with flower filter ears, Lol…with text reading..

‘Thought you might miss my face…’

Why can’t guys be as thoughtful as girls? Why are we girls all so attentive with one another, yet when we date, the guy’s we’ve chosen (aside from KatyP, who has the most romantic ‘Golfer Jonny’…even though she’s *six day* sore..) are FAR LESS so…? Why are relationships always hard work? They shouldn’t be. But maybe it’s me. That’s why I’M single…always. Lol.

I do love, love and i’m a hopeless romantic. But honestly, where is he? I know we’re not meant to have a perfect man in our heads. But I’m quite happy being single until that man rocks up..I don’t think i’m a bad woman. I think i’m a great woman. And my imaginary perfect man, isn’t made up of a list like most girls, it is all based upon how he would make me FEEL. That’s all I care about. Alongside handsome, sexy and stable.

I love eye candy. It’s always been a part of me that’s been really shallow.

I will always want to be with a really attractive man, provided his personality matches up to his looks. So technically, I’m balanced. 😉

Someone’s just sent me a link to read. I click on it, and all it does is unfold me really really slloooowly, then it states as a headline, ‘Paris Hiltons British Best Friend, slips a nips during photoshoot.’ 

Thrilling news…

Love you,

Chrissie x

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Gino’s, Issho & A Bit of Bottega Milanese

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So, last week, I think it was Tuesday, after I shocked myself up, the night before, dashed off a train, only to find myself in Newcastle, which was of course wasn’t Leeds and of course completely the wrong stop! Yipppeee! I waited for ages, hopped back on a train and tinkered home, got in at around 1am…and woke up the next morning ready for work and lets face it, ready to ‘work it.’

*Wiggle, Wink.*

The city was Leeds. A city close to my heart. And my number of stop off’s, shimmied to THREE…and I LOVE it when I get to visit loads of my faves in one day. It gets me excited…and you get to watch it, as I place it on my Insta story…(which is the whole point to me going.)

I actually fooled myself into thinking that if I wore pinstripes and looked moderately smart, I wouldn’t feel as tired and everyone would think I was sassy and posh. Haha. But whenever, I do venture into the city centre, through the day…I always dress quite smart anyway, because it’s that kinda city. We’re quite eclectic, yes…But we’re also quite ‘bouji.’ There’s a sense of style, grace and fun…no matter what walk of life you head into the city from.

You’ll strut…not walk. You’ll pass shoulders with young professionals in suits. You’ll cross city streets next to PR girls in heels. Everyone is well turned out…The city is alive. Everyone’s filled with ambition and ready to make something glorious out of themselves…It is a ‘stop off for a cocktail at noon,’ kinda town.

And for someone like ME…What could be better.

Plus, I always walk through the city and never drive through it, simply because I can only FEEL IT and blog about it, when i’m immersed in the middle of it.

At around 12.30, I tottered into my favourite ‘daytime gig’, which is the Espresso bar ‘La Bottega Milanese.’ I go there all the time, when I fancy a bit of peace, yet fun, because the tunes in that joint are SO good. It’s sort of R & B ish, which you wouldn’t expect from such an airy, calm place of creativity.

I blogged from the high bench, hungover on Tuesday..and I usually always get there around 11.30am. (They also sell Prosecco and light treats, even though they are an award winning espresso bar. In case you didn’t know.) And I loved every single minute of being there, because every soul around you is doing something creative. I was sat next to a guy who was writing poems in a notebook and a girl, with a sketch book, who he didn’t know, who was drawing him.

I LOVE THAT!

And both parties were completely fine with it all, because we’re still Yorkshire. We don’t get worked up over the little things that make people happy.

To my left, was a business man, who was conducting a meeting with a suited GQ looking colleague and they were both in ‘commercial property,’ discussing a ‘closing’ of a deal. I was blogging, hungover in the middle, in my ‘don’t look hungover‘ pinstripe shirt. And if you were following my story, you will have been there with me. (Insta: @chrissiewunna.)

It got really busy at lunch time and that place filled up in minutes. But I already had another place to stop by. So I packed up my pink laptop and tinkered back through into the city. But yes, you all should stop by La Bottega Milanese.

‘A place for networking, relaxing and to be seen.’

You’re drinks are served to you in the most creative manner and the detail and design of the joint is perfection. I go there ALL THE TIME.

My next stop was Issho. Now you all now how much I adore Issho, at Victoria Gate. It’s located in the ‘bouji’ part of the city. You’ll pass Louis Vuitton, Harvey Nics, and everything in between. It’s my favourite Sunday Afternoon ‘roof top terrace’ spot. The place is beautiful, calm, yet busy with a sexy quiet lust, It’s Japanses. Stylish and a haven for a models, glamour pusses, footballers, wealthy families, or the money man…That’s the vibe and whenever I go…I’ll always order a cold sake, which is served to me, in a Japanese clay bowl, filled with ice, to keep it’s temperature correct, at all times.

The staff are the height of exquisite, when it comes to service and they’re also so much fun. I mean I was talking to Jack…(I think it was Jack or was it John? Lol) Anyway, he is originally from Romania, just moved to Leeds, from Manchester, now working at Issho and has been in the city for only 2 weeks. He was telling me how having your own place in a new city is amazing, because you can do whatever you want.

If you wanna walk around naked with a whisky, you can.

Yet being new to a city, on your own is difficult, but only at first, because Leeds is a city where you make acquaintances quickly. It’s not as cold as London, yet there’s still so much to do. But he was going to Everyman’s Cinema with his work colleague, who was also so much fun..Also so much banter..and offered to take me swimming. Lol.

Me: ‘Swimming?’

(You don’t need to take me swimming to see me in a bikini. Just Google my socials. Lol) 

Issho J: ‘Well why don’t you come to the cinema?’

Me: ‘I’m already booked to go next week, for work.’

Bottom line, lots of gentle fun, surrounded by all things stylish and Zen. I could have a Issho Sake now. (What time is it?) Love that palce. You should go.

My last stop was Gino’s. Owned by the delightful Gino D’Acampo. Everybody in the city knows that this is where you will always find me…as it is literally my favourite haunt..and I influence the the glories out of this restaurant/bar. I’ve been to them all over. The staff are hot Italian Gems. I could not get treated better in that place and it is a stylish, but warm, family, friend or date spot, kinda joint. It serves you all and when you’re in there, you FEEL good, like you’re in safe hands.

Probably why I like to go.

The quality of the drinks, service and food is divine. I mean, as soon as I walked in, straight away it’s air kisses, love from the managers and the warmest greetings as I’m  and walked to the bar. i don’t even have to order (I go there so much) and a Prosecco in a frozen glass will appears, in front of me. Immediately, before I even wink, the beautiful Italian lady behind the bar, winks and says,

‘I’ve ordered you the focaccia, breaksticks wrapped in parma ham with pesto and honey drizzled cheese. I know you’ll need a bar snack, you can have them with your drink, to compliment it. 

PERFECT! HOW GOOD IS THAT SERVICE.

Then later, I got talking to Francesco ( Insta: @francesecolapodl) who works behind the bar there…and I loved him because he was such a delight.

Francesco: ‘Where have you just come from?’

Me: ‘Issho…It’s great there.’

Francesco: ‘Is it! I’m looking for somewhere to take my girlfriend on a date. I’m looking for somewhere Asian. We did Sukhothai…

Me: ‘Yeah, I love it there. Issho’s Japanese. So it’s like sushi/sashimi…and lovely. It’s pricey though..’

He *winks*…because that’s  what the Italians do. Oh the charm. I love the charm. Haha. I mean you can’t stop adoring the staff at Gino’s…It’s almost like a perfectly cast show of style, glamour, and Italian family values.

Then with a smirk, he says…(and this part is SOOOO HOT LADIES…..His lucky girlfriend…)

‘I don’t mind pricey. 🙂 The price doesn’t matter to me at all, Chrissie. I work in the industry. I’m happy to pay over and over again. for good food, great service and good times, with my girlfriend.’

Francesco, please marry us all. We girls LOVE IT when guys are hot like that. And it’s not about the date,  or the simple cost of anything..and all about the fact that it’s such a MANLY…GENTLEMANLY…TRADITIONAL way to be. It’s attractive. And all girls find it attractive. He’s the man of his kingdom and can take care of his girl on every level, out of love, respect and good times.

I kinda want to head to Gino’s now too? Lol

Anyway, I know that everyone this evening is going to be hooked on ‘Love Island’ and never venturing out again for the next month. But if you need places to go in Leeds, you should try the above three joints out.. I actually only watched little bits of ‘Love Island’ last year. But i’m gonna make the effort to watch more of it this year…However, I’m not gonna let it effect my social life. Lol. I am still a grown up. I can catch a tv show on repeat. Real life social interactions for always right now.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

What Some Of My Friends, Say About Me…

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Morning! It’s only just turned 11am. I’ve been working since 4.30 and then spend around 3 hours driving from city to city. I’m stressed out. I’m hormonal. But really super happy, for some reason. My diet is currently SHOCKING. I’ve literally just had a mircowaved Uncle Ben’s Mexican Rice, with a Prosecco, because I couldn’t find anything else to eat…FAST. I wanted a coconut water and celery dippers…But God just didn’t want life to pan out that way..and who am I to mess with the Good Lord’s wishes?

I’ve definitely put my pre holiday weight back on, (hahaha…I influenced Herbalife well 🙂 ) but to be honest, I’m not that bothered. It’s kinda gone on my boobs and thighs and i’m okay with that. 🙂 I don’t feel fat. I mean Jabba the Hutt’s fat. I just have ‘Lady Lumps,’ and I don’t hear anyone complaining. I feel sexy.

Anyway, I need to throw a ‘pity party’, so I’m not really going to be writing out my life today. I want some time to myself, with friends, in a quiet corner somewhere with a wine. Even though I have a lot on, i’m a little bit bored and that…. when you’re a ‘liver of life‘ is a mighty problem…as I tend to cause excitement, for no real reason. I love winding people up. I love making them feel alive, for a second.

But i’m feeling wonderful right now, because all i’m doing is LIVING. Literally LIVING, without a care in the world. I’m doing it to the fullest and with a positive beam and a giggle. I’m doing whatever I want, whenever I want…and it’s bliss. I’m loving me, loving you. I’m living for the moment. I’m not giving any shits or hoots about what anyone thinks.

You only have a short time on this Earth ball…so let’s just make our time, our story…worth it.

Don’t be afraid of anything….

But yes, because I can’t be bothered to properly ‘diary’ life today…Here is what some of MY friends, think /say about ME…..

‘Chrissie Wunna is one of life’s one offs!! Fun, fit and fabulous. She’s an amazing mum.’

‘She once sold my actual ass…YES my actual anus, at a gay bar in West Hollywood…to one of Janet Jackson’s backing dancers, for a stick of gum…I did end up sleeping with him, and she did get her gum, so technically, she’s magic.’

‘She’s a crazy bitch, but she’s so much fun. She always makes sure she has a story to tell…’

‘She’s addictive. She’s like a drug. She’s just someone who you’ll never forget.’

‘I don’t know how or why her love life is so shit. She’s literally one of the best birds I know.’

‘She has a tattoo on her right inner arm that she always lies about. Haha. It’s the last name of a guy she wanted, that she didn’t even date. HAHAHAHA. She’ll tell you some made up story about how it means something completely different. lol’

‘To say she’s so sexy….she wears her heart on her sleeve. She’s a hopeless romantic and it’s annoying. People never know that, about her.’

‘She’s someone who is really great at making YOU FEEL GOOD, Feel SPECIAL. Feel important.’

‘She’s a drinker…’

‘Her work ethic is ridiculous. She works so HARD.’

‘Great in bed. Haha. 😉

‘She’s not scared of anything. She is wild and free, but so down to Earth.’

‘Someone who doesn’t like to waste her time or any part of her life. She just lives it passionately.’

‘She’s one of a kind, that’s for sure.’

‘She’s really good in bed… 😉 ‘

‘She’s crazy, but at the same time so sweet. Love her blog…it gets funny..at times….’

‘She’s great at understanding people. She’ll give anyone her time, be you homeless or the richest man in the world… She can put herself in our shoes…’

‘She once cried over a penis…because a guy with a really good penis left her and she loved his great penis… Lol.’

‘She’s a legend, dipped in sunshine and tequila.’

‘Ambitious.’

‘She’s got this energy…Even when she’s quiet….She has this presence…’

‘Really talented…’

‘Amazing sense of humour. When she’s pissed off she’s a proper dick though… she’s stubborn…’

‘She’s the girl you wished you never dumped….’

‘Smart, savvy, needy, but fun.’

‘A total attention whore, but she does it SO WELL.’

‘She lives for love and excitement and panics when she doesn’t have it or feel it anymore.’

‘Loyal, trustworthy. Really good at keeping secrets…’

‘She’s so charming. She once farted in a grocery store…and it was almost like glitter and money flew out of her symphonic booty. I’m surprised people didn’t applaud.’

‘Big headed. Quite the ego maniac.’

‘She a girly girl, with boy banter.. She’ll sit and have a pint with you & be talking about sex, or pour the finest champers, as she winks at a handsome, dressed to the nines..’

‘Confident. Bubbly. You can actually see it in her daughter.’

‘She loves being glamourous.’

‘She’s never had a guy, really actually look after her or care for her and she deserves that.’

‘She loves a looker… and is shallow when it comes to picking guys she wants to date…lol’

‘She gets everything she wants… She knew exactly what she wanted to do with her life, from being 13.’

‘She swears more when she WRITES, than she does in real life..’

‘At school, she pretended to be on her period for an entire 3 months, so she didn’t have to go swimming, because it would mess up her hair and face.’

‘Just one of those great souls…’

Cue Song:

 

 

 

 

 

 

Blogging, Firmonnell & I’m in the MOOD for a Date

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Morning, my little pieces of ‘love festival.’ I’m feeling great today. There’s a beam around my soul, a tingle down my spine…a glint in my wink…and a sizzle of excitement in the air. I never know what life has in store for me? Who does? Yet, I just know that it’s going to be something wonderful.

(Even though I spent part of yesterday dressed as a Mermaid and that was somewhat alarming on all levels. Yet, a girl’s godda eat…so if work says ‘today you’re mermaid, start pouting for pics,‘ i’m there. I mean, it could be worse, I could be locked in a cellar, with zero chances of  prosecco and without the ability to selfie. Oh & just so you know, the picture above was taken by Insta: @AaronPix.Celebs & I’m pictured with Simone Reed, who has a new boyfriend, who’s apparently friends, with my friends.)

*Ramble Over.*

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So, what are you up to today? Owt or Nowt?

I’m going through quite a busy time right now, (where everyone wants a piece of me,) but like I said, it’s an exciting time, filled with opportunity, so i’m enjoying it. It actually feels like a really lucky time for me, so we’ll see what arises from the glitter pool. I’ll just keep everything crossed in the meantime and try and stay out of trouble. I’m so sorry to all the friends that I’ve had to cancel plans with for work. But honestly, it’s truly quite busy…I’ll come drink with you, always when i’m free.

*Always remind me.*

Who knew that writing a little life blog, could actually place you on some kind of ‘tippy tappy’ pedestal? I’m kinda in shock, but so utterly grateful. Never get that twisted!

I mean, who knew that, when I started typing out my life in LA, almost 10 years ago and simply because ‘D.K’ a middle aged barista (who kept a diary of everything he ate, because he had an eating disorder) told me to…Who knew that masses of people globally, literally on every continent of the world, were soon to be tuning into my life, as I ‘diaried’ along.

It’s nuts.

But what I love about the blog, is that it’s something that people just ‘discover’ out of nowhere, whilst they’re tinkering through their OWN existence. During that time they accidentally cross paths with MY existence…and ‘just like that’ they find THEMSELVES in this story.

It’s magic.

But I must’ve met a lot of people, because i’ll tell you, I’m bloody knackered.

I have an audition this morning, then I might head over to Gino’s Leeds for a quick prosecco to chill. You all know how much I adore that place. It’s certainly my hideaway and they never fail to treat me like  Queen. (Which I adore. Lol)

Remember last year, I got to speak to Gino and got to watch him work, as I became part of the madness during his stage show and launches…I had such a great time. I always go to the Leeds spot, yet when I did Harrogate, I cocktailed and played table football with, Adam Clayton. I don’t know who he plays football for, but he had his girlfriend’s Chanel bag dangling from his neck, who was also playing table footy with us.

There’s just a great spirit in that restaurant…I do drinks there all the time…and in the Summer, you should too! It’s a fun lunch spot.

Anyway, tomorrow, I’m at ‘Creator Hair’ in Sheffield. This time last week..(as if it’s been a week,) I bumped into Sam & Zara at the ‘Weaves & Waves’ event…You all know who Sam Reece is anyway and I love Zara, because she’s sassy and fun. No one does a better ‘resting bitch face.’ I love her for it.

Long story short…and after a few Whatsapp messages…I’m booked in at Creator Hair, (creatorhair.com) tomorrow at noon and Sam is gonna give me a ‘blow.’ 🙂

I just love saying *blow*

I don’t even know what’s gonna happen to my hair, (Hahaha) I just want to see them all again!! I’m excited. It should be fun. I’ll be blogging about my bouji bit of time there and I’ll try and get some really great pictures for ya’ll to see.

I had this mad phone call with my chick bestie ‘Firmonnell’ last night.

(Snapchat Msg)

Me: ‘Omg. When you’re free tonight, fucking call me. I’m stressed. All this shit has happened…and I don’t know what to do!’

It’s hilarious, because when we have a problem, one of us’ll send the other an ’emergency text’….and you can FEEL the ’emergency‘ in the message. We don’t do pleasantries. We just get tot he point.

By nature, we’re both sassy. We’re not lame…So it’s not like we’re all ‘come over to mine, drink tea, do a face mask and we’ll plait each others hair.’ 

It’s more like ‘fuck this, get gin, come now and sort my life out.

Then we’ll have a big verbal *THRASH OUT* where I’ll usually witter on about shit my love life always is, and she’ll solve all my problems, kinda like she’s Oprah, but drunk…

Once solved, she’ll then deliver her mountains of problems.

I never solve her problems. Lol. I’m too selfish. 🙂 Plus, I’m really shit at giving advice. Hahaha! She’s not someone that needs help. She likes tough love. And i’m good at that! 🙂

Witter. Witter. Banter. Banter. Moments where we *pause* to appreciate how wonderful are, in comparison to everyone else is. Lol.  I go bananas! Then we start accusing people of being ‘DULL’

‘Why are they the DULLEST PERSON IN ALL THE LAND. They definitely have shit sex. They’re SO DULL.’

Once that’s been said….

… it always ends with..

‘Well it’s their loss not mine. So I win!’

(Lol. Yesterday’s *Thrash out* was all about the art of ‘WINNING,’ when it’s mixed with this dodgy thing called ‘feelings.’)

Then it’s like we both just hang up on each other, like we don’t care.. Hahaha. Until the next time, my sweet!

I love ‘Firmonnell’ because I can be absolutely, truly 100 percent honest with her. I tell her EVERYTHING. And I never tell people anything! It’s like there’s nothing I can do WRONG, in her eyes…Even when I’ve really sinned and vice versa, there’s nothing SHE CAN EVER DO wrong…without me finding it funny. 🙂

Why can’t I just find a guy like that?

I’m in the mood for a date….Why is no one taking me on a date?

It’s sunny for crying out loud!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Taxis to Angelica, Sam Reece & Curly Blows…

So, I walk out the ‘back room‘ door, now armed with a pink vodka… I thank Gemma, for my ‘back room’ shindig…and Sam Reece walks out of the loo door, at the exact same time. He’s in a hat, skinny jeans….and let’s face it, he’s a much talked about ‘handsome’ that the ladies can’t help but adore…They all love a bit of ‘The Reecey,’ because he *oozes* a charm that is almost magnetic.

All the charm. All the *ooze.* All the hats?

Yet, I needed to go find Sophia…because I’d been meaning to speak to her all night. So, I had to totter off, by the now performing dancing ‘Gatsby Girls,’ who were body popping with ‘ooh faces,‘ tassels and winks galore.. and the poor kittens had to do all that ‘jiggery,’ to  a crowd of Reality TV faces…

Me: ‘Hiya! I wanted to come say hello. I JUST missed you in Spain. Literally as you were just getting onto Spanish soil, I was getting into a taxi back to the airport!

Sophia: ‘I know! I wish I had seen you! It was a good time. I wish I would’ve shot with you too!’

Me: ‘I know. Great combo. I love you. I’ve been watching ya stories.’

Now, in case you didn’t know. I adore Sophia. She’s young and currently on this series of ‘Ex on The Beach’ on MTV. She’d just had a drink ‘swilled’ in her face on the telly the evening before and she reigns by the last name ‘Filipe.

‘I’m Portugese.’

She’s a DREAM. After speaking to her, she is LITERALLY one of my favourite chicks ever. I just love her. So, I need to drink with her again…and will absolutely stalk her until she’s free. 😉

We chatted for quite a while and for someone who’s brand new to all this ‘on the telly,’ entertainment marlarky, she is the most savvy, together, and hilarious girl i’ve met. She’s quick witted. She’s fun. She’s smart. She’s a glamour puss, yet… like moi, (even if I do say so myself,) she’s one of the most ‘down to earth‘ chicas, you’re ever gonna run into. I could’ve chatted to her all night. Yet instead we pissed ourselves.. at OUR OWN rubbish sense of humours, giggled with ‘Marlie Weekender’ and bantered with the super sweet Joe Angus, (who is set to be the new ‘Scotty T.’)

Me: ‘Have to told Scotty that!’

Joe: ‘Yeah…Haha. I saw him in a club.’

Joe was actually really sweet…I don’t know how to describe him? He seemed sweet like ‘apple pie.’ He’s Geordie and sensible, but still giddy and fun. He’s one of the good guys…all responsible, all ‘on time‘ and shit… and offered to drive people everywhere….because he’s kind like that. Lol. He even brought a hoodie, to keep himself warm and normal. 🙂 If you grew up in LA, he’s like what we used to refer to, as the ‘Good Midwestern Boy.’ But he’s British…and from Newcastle.

Get it? Good!

Long story short…The night at ‘Weaves & Waves’ was coming to an end…We’d all at so much to drink. We’d all embraced a bit of an event…and just now needed MORE, MORE MORE….As per usual…everyone fancied going for a few more drinks around Leeds. So fuck it…we did. Everyone always pretends like they’re deciding, and just goes anyway. 😉 (That always happens at events.)

I was chatting to ‘Marlie Weekender..’

Marlie: ‘My Mum is literally the best photographer.Honestly, you don’t even know. She’s like…pose like this. Pose like that…. I don’t know if I like the guy that I brought? I mean he’s hot, but he’s not that social.

Me: ‘She’s like your Momager. Lol. Which guy? Oh him? He’s hot. Why do I feel like a drag queen right now?’

Karl: ‘I like you. You make me laugh…Why don’t you come over here?’

(We start walking over to his crew of ‘friendlies.’)

People started getting into taxis, left, right and centre to….

‘Shall we meet at Angelica’s?

But I followed Karl, because he was gay and that’s what happens, in my world…

Anyway,  I start chatting to his friends Zara, a guy in a cool flat cap (i’m so sorry, I forgot your name) and Sam…(as in ‘Reece.’) They’re all hair stylists and work at a salon in Sheffield…I think it’s called ‘Creator.’ They came as a ‘crew.’

Banter, giggles, whispers and those moments when you don’t know the person you’re conversing with too personally, however you’re liking them, BUT still sizing them up.

‘Why does that dude, look like he’s poured himself into that shirt?’

Me: ‘Hahaha. I like that. His jeans are too skinny though! God!’

Karl: ‘Haha. I love you.’

We all decide to go for ‘one more’ at Angelica’s…But Sam can’t fit me in his car…

Sam: ‘I don’t have enough room in the car.’

Zara: ‘Meet us there…’

Me: ‘Can’t I just fit in the boot? I’m Asian. I’m fine with that.’

Then as everyone kept passing me shit loads of cocktails, to try and ‘finish up,’ and Weaves & Waves were on a ‘Key Hunt.’

‘Why is the key in Manchester???’

I jumped into a taxi with Rick (who organised the event)..

Rick: ‘Chrissie. I like you. It’s funny. I didn’t expect to. Did you win the Paris Hilton Show…’

…and the sexy Emma Woodhams…Who had definitely decided mid journey that she maybe hated all men and that she was definitely Beyonce in her ‘Destiny Childs’ days…

‘Look at me. I am.’

(Notice how everyone doesn’t expect to like me….Lol.)

We couldn’t find Angelica’s for ages. I asked everyone. Rick ran up and down escalators the wrong way, Emma danced and we maybe found Lego Land, whilst singing. I’ve been to Angelica’s 1 million times…so the fact that I couldn’t find it, means cocktails stole my soul.

Me: ‘This is like following the yellow brick road…TO HELL. How have I ended up with you too?’

Then a random helpful dude, pointed at a neon sign above, like it was a sign sent from the Gods…it read…

‘ANGELICA.’ 😉

And after what felt like a marathon, three trip ups, another escalator, a donkey, 42 piggy back rides, a ‘tuk tuk’ wave down… and 42 lifts… We got there…

Me: How the FUCK, do we get to that SIGN…!! Are we…?’

Random Lady (as the elevator door opens):…’Yes, you’re here..’

Prosecco was poured. I spotted Sam, Zara and ‘le crew’ over at a table…we ‘eye clocked..’

But Rick had decided to order us all prosecco, so under the stars, on the roof terrace, we all chatted life, as we pondered our existences.

Me: ‘Right, I’m gonna snapchat the table, so if any of you are doing or saying things you don’t what people to hear…DON’T.’

Everyone laughed…then stopped sinning, for exactly 10 seconds.

NO Filter.

After banter, I decided to go back to chat to Sam and crew….

‘I’m off over there now…’

…who decided to shimmie onto the roof terrace anyway.

Zara: ‘We’re going after this one.’

They ended up staying…and it ended up being really fun. I love to chill and just drinky sip, as I chitter….It’s like the perfect scene for a bit of Wunna Land.

Zara: ‘So have you two known each other for ages?’

Me: ‘No.’

Sam: ‘No…We’ve just met tonight. In fact, I don’t even know you’re name…What is it?’

Zara: ‘Oh? I thought you two had known each other for years…’

Sam: ‘So you’re a blogger, right? Are you in Leeds, cos i’m just in Sheffield? I really like Leeds.’

Before conversations and sitting down on the evening rooftop terrace began, he had to REMOVE the pure sheepskin throw that was laid on his seat…He did so by just chucking it on the floor, in a good old lothario fashion…

Sam: ‘It might have bugs in it… Haha.’

Me: ‘Don’t tell me that, when I’ve got half my arse on it..’

My bum cushioned that flipping sheepskin. It probably thought it’s Mama was back for a nuzzle.  Sam can make ‘throwing sheep’ off chairs look sexy. I just sat on mine…I’m a glamour puss, but sometimes my arse just needs to chill…  then had to pull tables across….. so everyone could fit.

We’re all talking. I’m getting to know everyone. I’m warming up to Zara, because she’s a ‘tough crowd’ when she’s around idiots and bullshit. She doesn’t like it. She’s straight forward, direct and actually lots of fun. I loved her. She’s northern, like moi and will literally just ‘tell it how it is.’

Zara: ‘I just can’t deal with bullshit…and they’re bullshit.’

Me: ‘She’s cool though. The rest of them seem really young.;

Sam: ‘Yeah, I like her. She’s banter like a lad…’

By this point, a gaggle of girls had surrounded the table, all giggly and young, they were oozing with absolute delight, BUT WEIRDLY trying to pretend that they didn’t know who Sam Reece was…Yet, knew his name was ‘Sam Reece’ because the fucking said it enough. 😉

This is all you could hear for the next 10 minutes…

‘Are you Sam Reece?’ Sam Reece? It’s Sam Reece. Is it Sam Reece? Sam Reiss? No, Sam Reece. Sam Reece! What do you do? I thought you meant Reiss? As if it’s Sam Reece…Are you Sam Reece…’

Then everyone asked for a ‘Curly Blow.’ 😉

Sam: ‘It just sounds so naughty. Hahah.’

Me: ‘I know. I love it. Hahaha. I want a curly blow.’

Zara: ‘I don’t know how he deals with that…’

(Some girl was tossing her hair in Zara’s face and sat in her seat…so it was all awkward and hysterical, to watch.)

But let me tell you about Sam. The most politest, almost calm, bit of gentleman…served in the style of ‘male model,’ NOT sat on sheepskin, easy going…down to earth…God of all sex appeal. He’s confident, he’s not afraid to try and win a lady over….even though he’ll do so with swag. It’s delivered with a handsome banter… a chilled directness….almost a determination, that doesn’t make him look foolish. He likes to get what he wants, but his soul is good. He’s definitely one of the good guys, yet there’s an ambition in his eyes…Easiest person to talk to…Northern..

You can’t help but like this guy… I mean for someone who’s quite prejudged…and i know how that feels….he’s extremely likeable…

And I only know all this, because well all accidentally had to become his ‘wing man‘ and we were all shit at it. No. I take that back. i’m really good at being ‘wing man.’

We all ended up going home after a few more…We definitely didn’t let anyone get in our elevator… A girl was screaming for us to wait to get into our lift…and it looked like she’d be ages and have 40 friends and Elvis with her…

Sam: ‘I can’t be arsed with that….shut the doors… Haha.’

Then everyone decided to wait for me, on Boar Lane, because my car had got lost…and I couldn’t describe where I was appropriately.

‘I’ve just walked out Trinity and now i’m by Mcdonalds and Nandos…on the corner…’

Zara: We’re waiting because we want to. Don’t be silly. I’m not leaving you here. Shut up, you.’

Me: ‘I’m fine. Just go..’

And because i’m obviously shite at directing anything, Sam takes my phone out my hands…and like some tattooed ‘all together’ hero, starts chatting and solves my first world….’where is the driver’ issues..

‘Is it that Range Rover? It’s here.’

Everyone gets kisses, everyone makes sure I get home safe….THEY go on to Fiber…I get my sorry ass home.

I’m actually at their salon on Thursday….And I’m really excited to see everyone again.

The reason why I loved the ‘Weaves & Waves’ event so much, was that it was actually filled with people, who I loved. That hardly happens….And, it was great because everyone there was ‘alive’ and everyone their was filled with personality. They were all open and easy going…which makes a blog really fucking easy. 😉