Book Tours, Diamonds & Slay Games

‘Right!! The first one out of you two to get a *rock* on it….wins!!!’

Two of my delicious little chick friends are dancing in the ‘let this be forever’ stage of their relationships. A stage that no guy really knows about. Yet all their chick friends hear about!

‘Fairytale Blond’ does love via a Disney text book, so she ofcourse a ‘year in,’ she would be helplessly  hoping for a bit of official Prince Charming commitment. New love….New House…New Diamond.

Mel…is my unconventional, sassy, ‘I’m getting married in red’ sex machine. You don’t fuck with Mel. She turns red with anger and then eats Jelly Babies to calm her sore vulva.

Now, she’s already discussed ‘lets do forever’ with her Gary (who I saw yesterday but couldn’t look in the eye because my imaginative mind kept physically picturing all the rampant sex that he had been having with her…in porn form. All he did was walk past me and say ‘Hi‘ and my head imagined him eating Mel out, so I had to run and hide. Hahahah! Code for: I just sat there staring and imagined it.)

‘I just can’t look him in the eye now that I’ve heard all these filthy stories.’

Anyway, whether they’ve discussed ‘forever’ or not…I’ve decided to spice up their lives a little, by forcing them to play the ‘ROCK ON IT’ game. A casual game, where I watch them both secretly *fight* it out to get a proper proposal…for kicks. Hustle Barbie could probably play this too, yet she wants to start a glamour modelling career and marry D’Acampo. And well Double B….Hahaha…the game would be tooo easy. Jordan and his ‘Jackson Five’ penis would marry her in a wink.

Mel: ‘Yeah, but we’ve already talked about…’

‘Nope, it doesn’t count, until you walk into this room… with the rock on it. 🙂 You walk in, you say nothing, you hold up your left hand up in the air and bling it.’

‘That’s fine. I’ll just tell Gary that I need to win and send him to the jewellers. Lol’

Fairytale Blond was quiet, with her heart all a flutter and then decided that Mel would win. Lol. (But she’ll play it strategically, as ‘Fairytale’ is not soft. She knows how to get what she wants.)

Mel: ‘What about you! You’d probably win this…!! Lol.’

Me: ‘Hahaha. Please. I have a hundred more months of sending nudes before that happens. LOL.’

So yeah…game on! Let’s see who wins! I’ll come back to this blog when one of them struts in with the ‘BLING HAND’ in the air. There’s nothing more fun than a ‘fucking up everyones love life’ game. 🙂

Life is great right now. I’ve a busy kitty and I’ve got my Friday feeling! Work is great! I’m juggling. But I’m gonna try and take so time off to focus. I’m not a ‘here, there and everywhere’ kinda gal. It may seem like that. But i’m the opposite to wishy washy. I’m driven and sharp, so I just need a moment, after yesterday’s delicious ‘early night’ to bundle myself together and chill. Calm mind, Great results.

I’ve told you once and I’ll tell you again…EVERYTHING IN THE FUTURE WILL BE SOCIAL. So all of you hoping to smash the big time ‘Dollar, Dollar, Fame Ball’ with a boobie bounce of victory….KNOW that you need to meander your career or lives down a Social Media path. If you don’t start it now…you’ll get left watching everyone else succeed.

I started my blog 10 years ago. I didn’t even know why? Five years in…nobody knew why I bothered doing it…But I at that point understood where everything was headed ‘socially’….A couple years after that….EVERYONE’S A BLOGGER OR A VLOGGER and it was in that moment where I accidentally smashed it, because all those previous years of blogging both honed my craft, built an audience (which is what you need) and made my STATS AMAZEBALLS!

And yes, it’s harder to start a blog/vlog now…as your competition is much much greater. Yet, if you don’t try and you wish to partake in a career of that fashion….you’re stupid. In years to come, no one will be watching tv…your shows will be online…Glamour Models are now Instagram Models. She’s now not a beautician, she’s a Beauty Blogger. You have Business Men starting everyday vlogs. Secret Footballers writing daily diary blogs. My inbox is literally RAMMED with the most amazing people or brands who are wanting to appear on this blog, which is literally just the story of my life. So yeah, blogging and vlogging are two different things. Find out what you’re stronger at and go for it.

Anyway, away from that! I’ve been doing shoots. This morning, I’m excited to see some of the new pics that Claire Pritchard has shot for me, for her Fallen Angels Brand. I can’t wait to show you them, and you will be seeing them shortly, as I tease your little tinglers, with a slow release of online Wunna ‘look at me.’ Claire is one of the most amazing photographers, so I can WAIT shoot with her again shortly…as we have a Playboy/Kitchen shoot to do…this time i’m taking Prosecco. I love her so much. So yes, if YOU wish to be a Fallen Angel please shimmie on down to ..

clarepritchardphotograpnhy.com

The pics will be on my blog over the weekend.

I have a book out this year. It is the relaunch of ‘Diaries of a Glamour Puss,’ yet i’m rewriting it, it’s being rebranded and ofcourse shot for again. I love a shoot. It now will be called ‘Dear Diary…’ and it’s taking you back to Volume 1 of my life…So it’s Chrissie Wunna (the naughty years. 😛 ) It’s a silly, but sexy bit of ‘all out there’ book. I’m sorting it all out now…and i’ll also be going on a signing tour, so you can get to meet me, have a chitter and well…if i’m being honest…just buy the flipping book. Hahahaha!

The eyelash line is also relauched at Christmas and I have a cheeky little secret that will popping up soon. (NO. IT’S NOT A BABY! LOL)

Ruby slept in my bed last night, as she does when Junior’s at his Daddy’s. I watch her when she sleeps and can’t believe how beautiful she is. We’ve come a long way. I’ve worked so hard and this is the first time in my life where I feel like i’m actually smashing it for them both. She’s six and waited until I had gone to sleep, just so she could sneak out of bed and stay up all night playing pretend pool parties.

‘What? I pretended to be asleep, so YOU would go to sleep and so I could get up and pretend Justin Bieber was at my pool party! I thought you said that we only live once!’

Ruby IS a terrifying MINI version of me.

Although, i’m celebrating a THANK FUCK it’s FRIDAY thing. Saturday i’m headed to London to meet with a Mr Kenworthy, in regards to a new project that i’m hoping to tinker with. Which reminds me, I need to finish off those questions. I’m trying to fit everything in, in blips. It’s not easy….sober. 🙂

But nonetheless, I can’t wait for the meeting and hopefully i’ll saunter out of it with a new business *notch* on my brand cycle..

Work hard. Get what’s yours. YOU CAN MAKE ANYTHING HAPPEN. If you do it fucking well!

Take a shortcut…you’ll get cut short. Half ass it…you get a calm stream instead of a gushing river. Have a fall back plan? YOU’LL FLIPPING FALL BACK ON IT.

 

 

 

 

 

Fun, Sasserillas & That Thing Called Life

‘There’s so much SASS in this office today! I’ve honestly gone out to buy a new car and a bunch of new suits simply because it’s all girls and all such a Fashion Show,’

…said the Newest ‘D’ to the little Burmese Glamour Puss, as ‘Firmonnell’ nibbled a warmed chicken fajita and we looked over the town from our glass windowed tower. (I had a pasty. It was really glamourous…honest!)

And tooooooooooooooooo right, Baby Boo! There’s no slumming it, without SASS allowed! Be armed with wit, charm and the best shoe game in town. Then with a *wink,* laugh off the drama and swirl it round with magIco!

‘What does Hasta Manana mean?’

‘Bananas.’

‘You should know Chrissie. Didn’t you have a Mexican Husband once?

‘I didn’t listen though did I! Why have you got a Rubix Cube?’

‘I can do it..’

‘As if! I totally fancy Justin Bieber simply because he can do a Rubix Cube.’

‘Ugh! You should fancy Will Smith. He can do a Rubix Cube.’

‘I do. I fancy them ALL!’

Now, that would be a jolly threesome to consider and I CANNOT THINK of ANYTHING WORSE at my age than the thought of a THREESOME. I’m more of a get married and enjoy a love swirl kinda girl, than I am a ‘messy threesome’ type. Now i’m 30 something. They gross me out. I just couldn’t be bothered, could you? I’d prefer to just hand out the refreshments or something? They’re never very ‘Arabian Nights’ are they? And more just in someones 2 bed apartment, by a washing machine and sofa.

Romance is alive.

Anyway, that wasn’t the point to my blog today.

Today I wanted to expressed how IMPORTANT IT IS TO JUST FUCKING HAVE FUN!

Jesus.

We all work so hard. Work all hours. Chase dreams madly. Stress out about the bullshit that life chucks at us and sometimes you’ve just got to stop the *running/chasing/dashing/stressing* and kick it with four wines, good times, great friends, love and family. Sometimes we just need to forgot about the ‘busy,’ the ‘money being made‘ the drama, the decimal points, the percentages, the targets and do life…LIVE, love with our heart on our sleeves and get lost in a swirl of magic.

I work too hard. Well I think I do? I’ll hit brick walls and climb over them with giggles and that in itself is a great talent.  So I’ll pat myself on the back for that, as I’m going through a really busy time.

Yet, I can work TOO HARD sometimes that I forget to enjoy having fun! AND WHAT COULD BE MORE DULL. What could be more unattractive, right?

Yes, i’ve got goals. Yes, I’m ambitious and driven. Yes, I KNOW that i’ll get there. But the one thing GREAT thing about me, is that I know how to have a good time.  I’m free! I know how to let loose, have fun and ENJOY LIFE. I have a great grasp of what life means to me and what I stand for…

Infact, the one thing that made this blog popular (aside from the telly stint where I tinkered with Paris Hilton and tried to be her best friend for ITV2) was the fact that openly had a blast I did and still do MY life, MY way and without being censored. And that’s real. That’s the good stuff. That’s the first bite of ‘MMmmm’ when you’re scoffing a great meal.

We’re in Spring. We’re headed for Summer…and it’s about time we geared our pretty selves up for a good flipping life!

Have that extra 2 drinks. Dance infront of your mirror naked. Buy that expensive new whip. Laugh out loud. Dip yourself in Luxury. Save for that Mulberry bag. Party the night away. Text that girl or guy you fancy. Chill with friends. Cuddle with your babies. Fall in love. Get ya hair did. Take that trip! Enjoy risks. Love new chapters. Trump out loud. Kiss a few frogs! Lay in if you want to! BE DELICIOUS! Just love whatever it is, that you see as ‘good times.’

We spend too much time stressing about bollocks and dream chasing and all that *panic button* jazz! We obsess over it, don’t we? When really, we forget that’magic’ that glistens from us having those ‘good times’ that gets us where we need to be.

I AM the single most ambitious girl you will ever know. I work hard. Yet, what i’m realizing is that sometimes, you’ve done everything you can in a moment…and once you’ve batted that glitter ball, across your flashy giant ball park, you just have to chill and let someone see it, catch it and realize that you’re wonderful.

So, yes! Make your mark on this world…But oh my GOD, have a blast whilst you do it! It’s that *glow* that makes you sexy!

Right now, I’m no so bothered about an audience, a follow, a ‘like’ a whatever it is? I’m having a great time with my chick friends, all the work that I have a bubbling and my time with my babies…and i’m loving it. I’m not worried about ‘an audience’ as it always always finds me…I feel really confident. I’m set for good things and if i’m not…I’ll live. 🙂 I’m gearing up for fun….and I intend to EMBRACE every single waking minute of it!


 

 

I did The Clothes Show

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So i’ve been at The Clothes Show! The last ever Clothes Show to be held in Birmingham, as it will move to Liverpool for the coming years. (Yay! Northern!) I am a regular haunt at the event…and blogged it for a jazzy while. I’ve presented it. Smoozed. I’ve shopped! I’ve celebrated the event with love, as i genuinely find it divine.

This year has been the best year that I have ever has the pleasure of being invited to. Oh my GOD, I could LIVE at The Clothes Show this year. You should go, as it is ever girly girls DREAM LAND. There is no where on earth where you can literally shop until your little kitten heart is satisfied, smooze with your fave reality tv celebs and when you need a ‘pick me up’ saunter into some kind of ‘Lounge’ for a lift up! Jesus! There were the MOST GLAMOROUS Pop Up lounged everywhere. The ‘Diva Lounge,’ the ‘Pamper Lounge,’ the ‘Lambrini Bubbles Bar,’ the this lounge, that lounge, get your hair did and teeth whitened whilst you ‘chill for ten’ spots. It was AMAZING and pretty much catered to everything that I’d build shrines for. I snapchatted my Clothes Show Story for all of you to see and let me tell you IT IS MARVELLOUS. I mean GOD, i’ve done Lambrini proud. Lol. I don’t think anyone has made as much impact in a ‘Bubbles Bar’ in their life. If i can do anything, i can kick back, meet new people, selfie pout with folk and drink in glamourous ‘pop ups.’ It’s the new thing innit, ‘Pop Up’ Wine bars and they are my favourite. i guess with Lambrini, i sort of just represent eerything that they market, so i was a great ‘Bubbles Bar’ choice. Lol. I’ve sipped and sampled every single new Lambrini Flavour and I can you Strawberry is my fave.

 

 

 

I even had my fortune told by accident via a crystal ball and I tried not to take it seriously, as you don’t do you. But holy shit, when i got beckoned behind a curtain and asked to hold this ball, (I’m good at that. 😉 ) THE THINGS THAT GYSPY  Margaret Rose Lee were telling me were things that NOT A SINGLE BEING in this entire world, but myself and my family would know! It was crazy. I was kitty shocked being this little red curtain…as she looked through my past, present and future. BANG ON, she was! And i guess as always my future is charmed…I can’t wait to get to the ‘charmed’ bit of my future (haha)…as even though i’m a positive soul, who has it pretty good, I’m heavily ambitious when it comes to work, love and family….and well this waiting around and working dead hard at it stuff can sometimes be a draaaaaaaaaaaag. When i have success, love and everything with bells on, then i’ll be able to do things like have a quiet drink in a bar, by myself and not stress and lay in bed at night, without a busy mind. I can’t wait for that bliss.

Okay away from that! Let’s go behind the scenes, as in life i have the best of both worlds at such events, where i’ll get booked to, what i call ‘be a face’ and entertain, yet at the same time GET TO BE PRESS, with my pass for chrissiewunna.com and venture through the back stages, the press calls and get all the behind the scenes gossip. I know, it’s awesome. So, for those of you who love a bit of Pop Culture, a bit of ‘Celeb,’ a bit of reality tv, i’ll tell you that i got to share time with Joey Essex, Alex Mytton and Jamie Laing! Reality at it’s finest. I watched them, studied them and listened to everything going on around them. I always kinda look smiley, boobied and giddy…but i scan and watch EVERYTHING!! The little things a opposed to the big things.

 

This is what I can tell you…

I’m not about to hear anyone call these boys ‘famous for nothing,’ as people tend to say that about Reality show personalities, don’t they. I’ve experienced reality show life and not even nearly close to the popularity that these boys are going through and that alone was HARD.

These boys must work almost every hour under the sun and then some to build and maintain a profile and do what people with ambition do, make money! I mean Jamie Laing had just got back from travelling for fifty hours, back from Australia after his ‘I’m a Celeb’ Extra Camp gig, to come and present a fashion show in Birmingham. Plus he had his brand ‘Candy Kittens’ at The Clothes Show, so he was making sure that was running smoothly also. I watched him present a fashion show and he’s just a natural entertainer, he sort of looked like a veteran in comparison Alex, who also shimmied on Made in Chelsea with him. Jamie’s warm hearted, talented, a great entertainer and ‘human’ not fakey. There’s nothing stuck up about him and he’s just a joy, you can see it in his soul. There’s an energy.

Alex…extremely good looking, not a telly newbie, but seemed a bit more quiet that Jamie. However, non the less, sweet, got on with it and was fun, fun, fun with it all. I did notice that whilst he was in the ‘pap pen’ and saw a camera man and I stood taking piccies, that he clocked the camera man straight away and like the sexy boy that he is, rolled up his sleeves a little on the sly to make sure we got a good view of his ‘gun show’ on pictures. Lol. Now, i’m not one to complain. I say ‘Good boy!’ But it’s interesting isn’t it, as to how people feel the best way to market themselves is. I love how his mind ticks. Interesting guy! I was on the same train as him on the way back. He had his girlfriend with him, who was all skinny, blond and..well…not every smiley. Haha. I don’t know how these guy’s hold proper loving, long term relationships. It must be difficult.

And Joey….The whirlwind that was Joey Essex! It almost felt as though every teenager in the entire world had decided to stand in one spot in Birmingham, at The Clothes Show  and as he quickly paced out, guarded by security, cameras and all sorts…they ALL decided to get their New Look knickers in a twist and go ABSOLUTELY MENTAL, like Michael Jackson had trumped gold on Justin Bieber or something!! And to the loudest screams ever, they elbowed and tripped each other out the way, clambered on shoulders and rushed, dashed and fell with camera phones…They lost their entire teenage MINDS! (I got elbowed and kicked a bit, as I was stood right next to him, but i had a Press Pass and Celebs love People with Press Passes, so i was sorted. Lol)

Now, this is what you didn’t know (or did gather) about Joey…who makes his ‘dollar’ by maybe selling himself as maybe not the ‘brightest berry’ in the bunch. And God does it work. He’s rinsing it. Well done!

But let me tell you, if you were to watch him talk to his manager during a ‘madness moment’ like that or behind the scenes, he is LITERALLY one of the most savvy, intelligent and ‘in the know’ guys on reality tv. He’s direct. He knows what he’s doing. He knows what he represents and he is all ambition and work. He knows it’s work and he smashes it! I heard him talking to Dave his manager with this power house voice of ‘this is what i want you to do.’ He had guardian and cameras filming the madness, on his instruction…(clever, clever) and he got through his Pap Pen session, with less heart than Jamie, but with the biggest career mind out of the BUNCH!

They work really hard and they have to, as the world of ‘Reality Celeb’ isn’t easy anymore is it. As it’s become more and more about being really savvy at the old marketing and winning popularity ‘doo dah’ than anything and now EVERYONE has become really really good at it. I’ve always thought there is room for everyone and as long as you have talent, a creative flair and or a business mind….I mean, as long as you’re good at your craft, no matter what it may be…and you work the hardest you have ever worked at your passion or goal…you’ll get there!

The great thing about these boys is that they made so many people happy that day…and when you do that…it kinda makes it all worth it.

 

 

 

 

 

 

Crazy little thing called…

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I’m back, I’m not whack and I’m certainly on track!

Let’s blog!

So, i’ve been really busy, enjoying and getting on with life! I’ve enjoyed cheering people up and just not taking anything too seriously. I’ve refrained from putting up with the Billy Bull**** that the world or others can often try to pour upon you. Safety first! Belt in or duck, weave & dodge. 🙂 You are a product of your environment. So it’s essential that you karate chop the negative with a glamourous shrug and absorb all things positive as they fill you with warmth and good vibes. It’s attractive. I’ve swirled in a glittery happiness and felt really lucky about my own story, be it in work, at home, in love and all round! I’ve been steady and kept myself to myself…yet i’m ready for a bit of fun this week.

I still don’t have my car as when i went to sort it all out, the joint was closed. Yipppee! But ah well…what can do? Exactly nada. I did a weekend graft. Work feels great! And as a result, I’ve managed to enjoy accidental granny naps and all day today 🙂  inbewteen moments with the kids, my mum and my dad. I’m feeling relaxed and boy does it feel good. Infact, I will say the Baby Daddies, Pete and Keiran have been good during the no car situation. Pete always offers destressy verbal support and Keiran will always by nature see it as his ‘duty’ (because i have birthed his child) even though it’s not is duty really, to solve any problem that I have..and that’s kind.

‘Chrissie, don’t stress…if you need your car issue sorted. I’ll do it. call me in the morning and i will have it all sorted out for you. Call me, if you need ANYTHING!!’

I’ve giggled with new faces and been grateful for the return of old faces. I’ve missed my LA guy friends (Brandon especially, we’ve had such great LA adventures in our time and i miss him as he’s always so lovely. As a friend, he never ever fails to make sure that i know how much he appreciates my existence openly…and i’m the same way. It’s ace!) I’ve also enjoyed moments pointing out eye candy with the girls. Like i always say, ‘eye candy is always fun, as it’s harmless. There’s not pressure, no drama, just peeks and giggles and an appreciation of those who are attractive. Lol.

‘Who is that?’

‘You’re specialty. A greasy, dark haired, GQ looking Italian, in a suit.’ HAHAHAH.

I don’t really think i have a type? But my friends certainly seem to think i do. I don’t think I discriminate? (That much. 🙂 ) Yet apparently, i have a motif that i will go for…and that motif (which i swear is not true as in the past i’ve dated all different kinds of gents, from all different walks of life.)  Yet according to my friends, this motif is ‘tall, dark haired, tanned, italian looking, stylish male.’ HAHAHAHA. Doesn’t every one like that though? I mean, i’m not one to discriminate on hair colour. Lol. I don’t pick people just on a look lol, there are other things, OTHER THAN THE MOTIF lol, that i do look for and that is a sexiness in the form of kindess, thoughfulness, humour, a sense of fun, great manners loyalty, consistency, silliness, reliability and INTELLECT. I love smart. I find it sexy. I love funny…i find it sexy. I love affectionate…i find it sexy. I like brave ambitious, emotionally stable men. 🙂 A physical attraction matters…dont’ get me wrong. As i couldn’t bring my self to make ‘whooppee’ with someone that i didn’t find ‘ooh laa.’

Anyway, away from that…I did lunch with my folks this afternoon and my dad tried to sell me at a Turkish delight stand to a man from Iran. He does it smuggly, whenever a random guy comments on the way i may look… or my boobies. He reminds them that I get my ‘sexiness’ from HIM, which puts them off instantly. Hahaha. My Father and I have been gifted with a tremendous sense of humour and fun. The man from Iran, didn’t even know what hit him. But i still got sold. Lol. Cheers Pops! He’s never really worried about me or over protective as he’s always super proud of how i can handle the sticky male situations i seem to get into, with absolute Wunna charm and it’s because i’m so used to it. My Mum on the other hand, who’s ace and dynamic, will kill you, if you mess with her first born. 🙂 I like that. I think it’s hot. 🙂 She won’t let me deal with a ‘situation’ of sorts, as she sees it, as her duty as MUM, (lol) to step in and sort it out for me, before i’ve even begun with the evil charm.

I got really bored today and started stalking everyone’s Facebook profile. It seems you all do it too, as when i mentioned it, it got ‘liked’ quite a lot by other fellow stalkers. Kinda made me feel at home. 🙂 I even had a discussion on how you need to becareful incase you accidentally ‘like’ their pictures from years ago or genuinely like’ a shot by accident whilst getting carried away on a ‘zoom’ in. Lol. HAHAHA.

I won’t tell you who i stalked…but today out of boredom…i was on point. HAHAHA.

My inbox is still thriving, which is boring now. I kinda only wait to see if it’s a message from of my actual friends or a message from a guy that I might fancy. It’s a shame that their messages get wedged inbetween pictures of random willies, nonstop random video calls (that i will never answer, IF I DON’T KNOW YOU,) utter weirdness or I will say compliments. That bit’s nice.

I also got asked the other day how i manage to get on so well with my exes. I get on with them well because i place them in ‘the exes’ box and i never return to that box for ‘tinkers’ EVER. I’m not petty or stressy by nature, i respect them, value you them as friends and i think that sometimes in life you meet people for that particular chapter…and that’s a good thing. It’s not a bad thing. However once that chapter is up…and your rapport has changed…your connection with them alters…and they kinda just become a friend, as a new being struts in, which is a being you’re again MEANT TO MEET and it’a normal to feel excited about that without guilt. And that’s really natural. People always act like it’s so odd? I never get that. It’s how life works. I mean i hate it when people moan on about how tragic they’re relationship is…if you hate it…change it. Simples. Be with someone who makes you feel excited…a better connection, as one day you’ll meet someone, who you struts into your life, that you don’t run out of love for…and life is all blissy without drama. It’s easy, they understand you and yes again it’s VERY NORMAL. Just get on with it.

Also with my exes, ofcourse i will have gone through hideous times with them, hence why they became exes…Yet I manage to get along with them, as when i (very rarely) or sometimes *flashback* upon them, my memory has stored a GOOD moment, rather than a bad moment. It’s not in my nature to focus on the negative. I find it dull. So instead of remembering the shitty bits, I focus on the time I left Eric’s home in LA one sunny morning and he shouted, ‘One day i’m going to ask you to marry me Christina.’ And the time when Mike and I used to piss ourselves laughing at others and act it out on nights, with a bourbon. Or when Keiran used to have flowers sent to my work and leave me surprise gifts around the house to make me smile, whenever he was set to work away. I mean, I’ll never go back to these boys and GOD i had some awful times of shouts and tears with them…but they’re the moments i remember, the good bits, which helps me get along with them as friends.

I think chicks stress out about their relationships or their love life a lot more than they need to and that’s just down to security. I read this the other day….The way I see it (and i’m super single) is that i might not be someones first choice, or only choice, yet i’m a GREAT choice and ‘more fool them’ for not noticing. Right? I don’t pretend to be someone i’m not, because i’m good at being ME. I might not be proud of some of the things that i’ve done in the past, but i’m pretty proud of who i am today. I may not be perfect…but i don’t need to be. They either take the opportunity or watch me walk away. And that’s a positive way to see it because nothing is more attractive than an emotionally together female.

God, i need my weave tightened. I need to tan. I really fancy noodles and i’m about to chill with a Sunday night tipple and a bit of telly watching.

 

 

 

 

 

 

Dating, Perv Thursday and Love

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When your day begins with you standing by Dvd’s of the £2.99 range, whilst looking at your friend Jenna, who is firstly utterly oblivious that you’re looking at her… all tanned, hair tied back, blond and chick like, waiting in a kiosk queue to buy a Lucozade and she doesn’t AT ALL know that there is a BEAST OF A HOT MAN literally stood 4 feet from her…all studly, tall, dark, heroic, muscular and handsome. However then….like i had some kind of slutty ‘Cupid’s arrow,’ she slowly turns her head around and SPIES, the HOT, STUDLY, BEAST OF A MAN…has a good look…has more of a good look…then slowly turns her head back to form…her face notices me on the way (lol) and she pulls a girl face at me…which would suggest that here is a giant, studly, hot beast of a man, 4 foot away from her…Before she has even finished her ‘face pulling,’ I have ALREADY, mimed the words, ‘I KNOOOW’ at her, with utter excitement. And that Ladies and Gentleman, is what we call…’Perv Thursday!’ Boom! Join us! (Boys can do it, so we can tooo!) I appreciate eye candy in general…just to look at. To date…obviously there needs to be a dash of sex appeal, a good heart, a promising  soul, an interesting vibe, a good job… and well…my list in endless…but the main thing…for me…is the connection. That’s not what ‘Perv Thursday’ is about. ‘Perv Thursday’ is about peeking, appreciating and fun! (It’s kinda what guys to to me…instead of realizing that i might be of some actual substance. Lol.) Do know that ‘Perv Wednesday’ also occurred. Lol. Finding a bit of eye candy is a treat for any girl or guy who lives in Pontefract, as is doesn’t happen often. It is NOT LIKE HOLLYWOOD, where everyone is literally GORGEOUS! We treasure those moments of ‘eye candy’ and then listen to Victoria who tells me to move back to LA and find a husband, as i wouldn’t find a good match here, nor would i find a guy ho understood me or loved me the way i want him too. Hahaha. (I love Vic.)

I feel like i’m really busy right now? I’m working a lot, but i do anyway…. It just feels really busy, like i have no time to fit everything in..when really I have more time than usual? I work a great deal and i’m in a transitional period, where i’m changing chapters, jobs and all sorts. It’s scary, but i think i’m just trying to enjoy what i have going on and around me right now…as soon it will all be gone and plonked into a mental memory box. I’m really lucky…and get to wear pinstripes. I actaully had lots of ‘end of the day’ fun with Jenna today, we laughed and joked and moaned about everything, by grass covered bunnies, seeds, giant Connect Four games, and garden furniture. I even bought TWO, not one, BUT TWO flamingo watering cans, because i’m ace.

 

But even though i’m gonna miss her…it’s great because NEXT WEEKEND, i have my leaving drinks! Nothing is better than wiggling into your next chapter with good hearts, good friends and a cocktail. Things were easy today to be honest…i’m in a weird limbo phase, I found myself glaring at my new friend Chloe’s face as she told me about a guy named ‘Colin’ (I don’t know why that makes me laugh,) who has a massive forehead. Colin, with the massive forehead, wants to take her out on a date…bowling…She hates bowling…It’s not a sexy date is it? It’s not a fun ‘touchy’ romance date is it? It’s a Justin Bieber, early pop video, type of date isn’t it! HAHAH. But not with sexy Justin and instead with ‘Massive Forehead’ Colin. No wonder she wants to buy a sloth and misses her dog, even though it’s viscous?

What’s going on in my love life….Physically…nothing. My sex life is lie a Ferrari..I don’t have one. But i don’t mind it. Lol. I’d rather be safe than sorry. I can’t be arsed wallowing in heartbreak. Even if it’s glamourous. I friend zoned the Doctor, the Sailor…the computer guy…the random Newcastle boy, who i don’t remember? All sorts! I’m a pretty happy being and yes open to a great relationship. I love, love..when it’s the good kind. I love a good person. I mean, a weird thing happened today as i had thought about this sixty something year old, lovely, giant man, who i used to bump into, just on my daily travels. I hadn’t seen him in MONTHS. Last year even. I just remember him being so kind to everyone around him…so generous. Like if he was 20 years younger, he’d be MINE. Anyway, out of the blue, he came into my mind 2 days ago, as i hadn’t seen him in yonks…today…I SAW HIM, like magic…and it was lovely. Gosh, he even gave me a fiver for just being kind! Lol. Yay! AND because i’m kind also…i shared it. 🙂

Anyway, i got diverted…boys, dating, Summer…

My theory, as we all know is that guys don’t settle settle down in Summer…as Summer is about flings, freedom and fun. When it turns to Autumn, they cool it down, their tans get less red, their testosterone levels reduce.. and they start looking for cuddles, warm dinners, good loving and commitment. 🙂

PLUS, guys are terrified of me…and i never ever now why? I’m sure I should have it easy! Lol. I want to be in a swirl of love.