A Little Bit Of Inspiration & Dudes

‘Did *what’s his face* message you?’

‘He doesn’t as much now. He DM’d me the other day, but it was mucky, so I ignored it.’

‘What about the Naughty Swede? Hahaha.’

‘Yeah. He sent me voice notes at the weekend and on Tuesday, saying he has time of work. Hopes to see me sometime. Hopes i’m well..’

‘What did you say?’

‘I just wished him well. What can I say??’

The Swede is always lovely when he voice notes. Yet, it’s strange how other guys can only seem brave enough to talk ‘sexy’ to me. I don’t know whether it’s because they just see me as ‘sex.’ (Which I don’t like. I’m a lot more than a pulsing vagina, whether they like it or not.)

I don’t know whether it’s because THEY THINK, that’s how I’d like a guy to be, after seeing a couple of big boobied pics? I don’t whether it’s because they feel more comfortable emotionally with that approach? I just don’t get it? I just don’t know?

But right now, it’s not a priority. So I don’t seem to care. I don’t have time to aimlessly amuse a guy and ‘tickle his fancy’ on lonely nights. I have better things to do.

In this phase of my life, I would only have time for a guy, who made an actual effort.

Everyone else gets chucked in ‘fuck it’ bucket. Cya!

Sacha Not Fierce: ‘You’re such a DIVA!! Haha.’

I had my opening conversation via Whatsapp on my phone, during a foggy school run, this morning. I was strutting through a playground, in glitter heels, my specs and with a bag of shin pads in my hand. Oh! And I also had a little half Asian Baby attached to my leg…Luckily it was mine, which kinda saved any awkward situations.

(I was once in Camden and someone else’s child had got lost and accidentally attached itself to my leopard print faux fur. I hadn’t even had Ruby yet, so I remember looking down in terror. Then I realized it was a small child. So I smiled and said, ‘Life isn’t going to be better with me, Lovely! Let’s find your Mum.’)

 Big Kisses! Big Kisses! See you at 3.30pm!!! At 3.30, it’s the weekend, Babies!!!

Junior: ‘I love you MUM.’

Ruby: ‘When i’m older, i’m gonna be rich, just so I can have assistants.’

I’ve got so much going on right now, that i’m kinda just focusing on ME!! It may seem like I do that quite a lot. However, I actually really don’t. I get distracted by things easily. I put other things first. I sometimes give ‘distractions’ unnecessary priority.

But, at the end of the day, I’m a boobied Glamour Puss, not a Sergeant Major. That’ll happen. Yet, it shouldn’t happen ALL the time. I was INCREDIBLY motivated when I was a 20 something. You could see a ‘fire’ in my little Asian eyes. Now you see a ‘giggle.’ But the ‘fire’ is coming back.

It needs to come back, pronto. I think i’ve left under a bed sheet somewhere?

Sasha Not Fierce: ‘I don’t think you get distracted. I think you get bored and when you’re bored, you *hobby* boys, things, drama….anything, just to occupy your brain.’

‘Well, i’m not bored right now, i’m busy….’

Sasha:  ‘EXACTLY!’ And that’s why your focus is on YOU, Sassy Pants.’

Me: ‘I think I need botox?’

Old School Friend & School Mum (As i’m running back to my car):

‘CHRISSIE WUNNA!! I was having my cuppa tea this morning and WHO popped onto my screen!?! I nearly I died! I choked on it! Haha. I couldn’t even believe it. I was like OH MY GOD!! It’s…’

Me: ‘Haha. I know. It’s shocked everyone. But yeah, it’s on Dec 3rd…’

‘Well, I’ll DEFINITELY be watching!!! Good luck! Haha.’

Monday, December 3rd, 10pm, Channel 4. ‘First Dates.’ Set ya tellies!

‘I’ve been thinking about ‘The Swirl’ aka ‘T Bone’ a lot. He’s in my head. But he’s in my head because I miss him and i’m inspired by him. I need inspiration right now. He’s someone that’s really GOOD at focusing on what matters to him and balancing it all appropriately.

He sees the big picture and gives everything his all.  Now, I look back. I get it…because i’ve kinda found myself in the exact same position as he was in. I hope I see him in the near future….But I kinda probably won’t.

I’m also inspired by Toby, we know I am. He’s a life soldier. He’s a fighter. He’ll smash the upcoming Winter Olympics and again he’s someone who seems to stay very focused, without letting the art of ‘tango’ or ‘distraction’ get the better of him.

I’m glad that I briefly crossed paths with him, because he reminded me to take life and opportunity into my own hands. Like I used to!

It must be one of the keys to success. Both guys are sportsmen though. Maybe they’re taught that mentality, every day…

You’re a product of your environment right?

Saying that, Mike wasn’t at all a sportsmen? My first husband. (My Little Mikey Ray.) I’d already  had a few  dreams come true, so I knew that anything could happen. MY parents taught me that anything could happen if I tried, because they made THEIR OWN dreams come true. Mum came over here with only £17 in her pocket and built an entire EMPIRE by herself…

As did my Father, who trundled to the UK with his fingers crossed. He ended up being a bone surgeon and building his surgeries, across the lands.

Mum: ‘Yeah, then we had you. We thought we had it all sorted and you turned around and said you wanted to be a MODEL!! Hahaha! I was like, GOD!! RAY! What are we gonna do?? We know nothing about entertainment!!!??!!!’

(But i’m sure that can’t be true because my dad ABSOLUTELY bought The Sun Newspapers ‘Page 3’ Calendar every year and put it up in the living room. Haha. It didn’t even bother my Mum because she’s cool. Maybe HE inspired me! Lol. )

Whilst he did that, my mum took me around to every single dance class, agent, performing arts school, competition, audition, acting class, ACROSS THE COUNTRY.

You name it…I was there, from being about 7 years old onwards…and this was at the same time as doing school. I went to a Private Boarding School. I had a wonderful time at school. But you kinda had to smash it academically and perform. It wasn’t like you could toss it off and play ‘absent.’ It was competitive. But I liked that, because there was still a warmth!

Plus, all the kids there WANTED to do well. There wasn’t a single pupil there would ever turn around and say, ‘I can’t be arsed to be here.’

We LOVED being at school. It was like a resort, a well protected bubble.

There was no ‘hanging out by the bike sheds, sipping cider.’ It was all. ‘Have you signed up to golf, or pony trekking? I’m bored, do you want a quick round of tennis before tea? ’ Lol.

I remember getting pulled out of class, during my G.C.S.E years, to go shoot a campaign, or audition for a pop band..(lol) Everywhere I went as a child, to compete during this time…Sheridan Smith (who is huge now) was there, with her mum. Doing the exact same thing.

Everything must have been so hectic for my Mum. Yet to me it seemed busy, but it was just so fun and easy. However, I’m now only GOOD at working under pressure. I can only be productive when I have A LOT GOING ON. Otherwise, I get bored…and when i’m bored, you’ll know about it.

Meghan: ‘You’re never home! You’re always out and about.’

I still came out the other ‘G.C.S.E’ end, with 9 A’s, a couple A *’s and a B (for Maths!) I am RUBBISH AT SUMS. I can’t be bothered to add.

Miss. Liddle: ‘Did you see my SEESAW post!!! I’ve found what Junior’s good at! I tested him on his timetables. I put them in front of him, didn’t help him at all…and he got them all right! I was like YES!!!! Look in his bag!’

FINALLY!!!! BLISS! I COULD’VE CRIED! (But really! I could’ve cried!)

So, I have one child that’s a glamour puss and loves poetry, reading, success and beauty. Then another who loves maths, building, codes and logic.

Wait! I’ve got distracted again!

SHIT! I was meant to be talking about how I watched Mike’s dreams come true!!! Haha!

So yes…Forget all that. It must be all lies, because I seem to be good at making everything about ME, most of the time! 😉

BACK TO DREAMS COME TRUE…

Nothing is impossible if you want it bad enough…SOME dreams come true, but I reckon,  they come true because people work HARD, and succeed on purpose. They put everything in place, so that one day, when an opportunity for ‘dreams come true’ comes their way…THEY’RE READY!!

That’s all you have to do, right? Put yourself in a good place and the right place. The rest you leave to life magic and keep your fingers crossed. There’s always an element, a force beyond your control.

I WATCHED Mike’s dreams come true, with my very eyes. I watched him go, from wondering how he was going to  afford a Burger King, to doing a scene with Tom Cruise, in a movie, as I sat in a cinema.

I watched us never go out, because we had auditions the next day. I watched us once having to run out of The Saddle Ranch without paying our tab, to then a year later being sat at a five star restaurant, at dinner, on Valentine’s Day, next to Tom Hanks and his wife.

ANYTHING CAN HAPPEN! AT ANY POINT.

That’s why I hate it when people give up, because they stop believing. They run out of ‘fight.’

I mean, there are always moments where I sit with my head in my hands, thinking ‘FOR THE LOVE OF ABSOLUTE GOD!!’

But every time, I just take a deep breath, swig a wine and get on with it.

Don’t run out of hope. Don’t run out of ‘fight.’ Keep karma on your side, always, because HOLY SHIT, it can be a BITCH.

Love. Live.

Try not to doubt yourself. Focus on how far you’ve come. It’ll impress you.  It’ll stretch you that little bit further over the line, to get you where you want to be.

Don’t compare yourself to others. It’s depressing. Be inspired by them. But don’t compare your life chapter, to theirs. You don’t know what they’re going through behind an Instagram Pic.

Don’t let other people get you down. It’s your version of life, not theirs. Celebrate YOUR story. I’ve never had anyone ‘hate’ on me, who’s actually doing better than me. 😉 Use any ‘hate’ to motivate you.

I call it ‘Operation: Watch Me Now, Boo.’

Make the right choices FOR YOU. After years of sometimes making really bad choices and failing miserably, over and over again, I will actually tell you that it made me smarter. It made me stronger. Made me wiser.

HOWEVER, some of those opportunities were opportunities that really only come around ONCE in a LIFETIME. Lol.  I properly fucked them up because I was distracted. I had to find another tunnel and dig my way to the light. Save yourself some time. Haha.

Stay focused.

I would’ve preferred to have made the right decision in the first place.

I hear a lot of wise people advising others to ‘fail as much as possible.’ And I get that. It’s true. It makes you mighty in the end. You shouldn’t be scared to’ get back up when you fail,’ I guess is the message. Yet, DO KNOW that whenever i’ve made a GOOD DECISION (yes, that HAS ACTUALLY HAPPENED BEFORE) and done something right the FIRST TIME ROUND…. It hasn’t felt bad AT ALL. It’s actually felt WONDERFUL!! Haha.

I feel like Dr.Phil. Wait! No I don’t because i’m about to shoot topless on a space hopper, with a martini glass in my hand, for my birthday Insta pics.

We all have different lives. Do yours well!

I wonder what ‘Fairytale, ‘Hustle Barbie, Mel, Firmonnell and Double B are all doing? I haven’t caught up with them in ages.

I’m getting a Flash back of a time when Double B, Fairytale and I were all sat ON THE PAVEMENT, outside some building in Leeds, after a night out, waiting for Prince Jonny, at around 2am, some morning. Double B had her shoes off and some drunk Ginger guy thought we were homeless and threw change at us!

Hahah….

Will you still love me….

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I had such a ‘drama’ Monday, after the most blissful & peaceful weekend of ‘family.’ I’ve got so much going on, that i’m filling myself with a delicious flourish of stress. It’s kinda topped up with that beautiful thing we call ‘anxiety,’ simply because i’m terrified. I don’t even know what’s wrong with me? So, i’m gonna go with hormones?

I’m back on the telly shortly…That’s worrying me. I’ve got a lot to organise with the kids…That’s worrying me. I have shoots galore and auditions coming out my ‘hooty..’ That’s worrying me. My love life is *whizzing* around me, almost madly…I don’t even know what’s going on? Yes. I get a lot of attention. Yes, I’m single.

However, I’m noticing that, if I ever begin to feel for anyone, I get stressed out, because giant *CAUTION* signs go up everywhere. I’ve always had a shit love life. So, it’s scary. Plus,  I’m absolutely emotional, so to me, it only means ‘danger.‘ I do not ever want to get my heartbroken again….EVER. I tread carefully. (Well…fuck that. I ‘stiletto.’)

I have travels and schedules and places to influence…Everything’s a juggle…Sometimes, I panic and I can’t even breathe. (Cue: Drama 😉 )

But the weird thing is, i’m HAPPY. I’m really happy and maybe being so happy, or so lucky, makes me worry because LET ME TELL YOU, my life hasn’t been so easy….Haha. It’s laughable.

Basically, I’m scared of everything right now, because i’m having to pinch myself…and I need to ‘Man up,’ count my blessings and get on with it, with panache.

Anyway…

At the weekend, I did Meadowhall with The Wunna’s and Ruby. (Junior was at his Dads.) We were pretty much treated like Meadowhall shopping royalty (and I thank you for that, because I don’t even know why?) It did feel wonderful though.

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We shopped and stopped at Wagamama’s. Then after cocktail refuels, toy stores, makeup counters, new hair (we all need those extra few inches,) and my brand new chakra beads…Life felt almost perfect.

Ruby: ‘Mum. You’re chakra beads are not working. You’re CRAZY. You’re still nuts. They don’t work.’

(She is right, though. Even though I told her to ‘shush.‘ At this rate, i’m gonna need to see Buddha and get blessed by monks, or something! Maybe i’m just not meant for ‘Total Enlightenment.’ Maybe, i’m meant to live this ridiculous life of pathetic glory, for your entertainment… Haha.)

I’m starting to believe that…

‘Hey Destiny…You’ve fucked me over. You’re off the Christmas card list! You’re chilling on the naughty list, with Cupid and a few Pretty Boy exes from 2004.’

This is how I feel right now…

Like I’ve drank 42 energy drinks, had a bottle of rum, taken all my clothes off, and then thrown MYSELF to the lions.

Then…because i’m not at all mental….

…I lost the car…I always lose the car…Oh! Wait!! I don’t mean?Ugh. I’m rambling. I didn’t REALLY lose the car! I kinda ‘misplaced’ it? Y’know, when you can’t quite remember where you left it? 🙂 My Mum, drove home, because obviously, I guzzled Aperol Spritzies…after The Disney Store.

Fair enough, there was lots of wine, brunches and fun over the weekend. I checked in with my friends…briefly. Got on top of work. Then just relaxed with the kids. However….one of my favourite moments of the weekend, was the ‘school mum..’ catch up…

(There was a kids birthday party over the weekend…)

Miss.Murphy: ‘What are you wearing!?! Lol. Who wears glitter shoes to a kids party..?? Haha.’

Me: ‘Shut up. Lol. These are my driving shoes.’

Sam: ‘Does Ruby want Pizza?’

Me: ‘It’s like the Real Housewives of Yorkshire…’

Mum: ‘I got asked to be on Real Housewives of Marbella, a while ago, but I said no…I’m too boring, for it!’

Me: ‘You said NO! As if you said NO!! I can’t believe you said no. I would’ve moved to Marbella, to have done it. Haha.’

( I live for that show…It calms me, when I’m stressed. Yet, so does the occasional Jeremy Kyle episode…? So, yeah…I’m mental. Ignore me.)

Other Mum: ‘Oh yeah. I’m gonna be flying away with him.’

Miss. Murphy: ‘You’re actually going now! What about…?’

Other Mum: ‘Oh…he doesn’t know..’

Miss.Murphy: ‘You said he was fat and bald…But he’s not at all?’

Me: ‘How have I sat here for an hour and not known it’s your birthday today!!’ 

Miss. Murphy: ‘So, are you seeing your date again?’

I never thought i’d be a traditional ‘school mum.’ Yet, there’s just something about this group of Mamas, that is filled with the ‘sexy.’ They’re actually not traditional, school mums, in rain macs. They’re alive. They’re fun. They have designer shoes that read ‘LOVE.’ Louis Vuitton handbags and possible stables…’

They’re, what I call ‘Prosecco Mums,’ and I love them, madly. I’m like the tragic misfit of the bunch. The single, no husband, disorganized one, with a suggestive Insta profile…

We’re all really different from one another. Yet, w’re all great women. Confident women. Great mothers and well, I just really enjoy they’re company.

Then all our kids ruined everything and shoved tall plastic, slush palm trees, in our faces… 

At that point, the gossip got censored…

My inbox is * pinging,* almost every minute, with people asking me about my love life and my last date etc…

All I can tell you is that, the guy that I did the Manchester Airport date with, was wonderful. He says he wants to see me again, and I definitely will. I found him really sexy and confident. He’s smart and thoughtful. I liked him. I’find him interesting…I want to know lots about him…I’ll definitely be meeting him again. (I’m only one ‘meeting’ in. So it’s all ‘early doors.’)

I’m just treading carefully…Like I said, I’m not bothered about getting my heart broken, right now, when I have so much going on…

I eventually want to fall in love. I’m a true romantic. I want to be swept off my feet. Adored. Respected. And y’know, in that one meet up, my date was that! He was a REAL MAN, which made me notice that I’d not only been looking in the wrong place for love, but i’d wasted a lot of my time, on ‘little boys.’  At 37 years old, I don’t need to be doing that!

When it comes to love…

…this time..because obviously i’ve been married three times and had numerous flings and relationships..I want to PROPERLY fall in love. I want it to be stable and forever…with no stress. No drama.

And I do want to just say, that even though on paper, i’ve dated, romanced, flinged, loved, married, divorced, sexed..and well…just all sorts, with men, all over the world.

DO KNOW THAT….

… I never did all that because I was a floozy. That’s one of the biggest misconceptions about me. I’m a love bunny. There were options. I was young. A glamour model. Off the telly…Growing up in Hollywood…All sorts.

Yet, I never was and still not a man eater. I’m non judgemental. I’m modern. Yet when it comes to love, I’m quite ‘fairytale.’ I’m quite traditional…I’m a hopeless romantic, with a capital ‘H.’

I’m tragic…

So, every single time, I went into these encounters, with men, boys, gents, or misfits..

I always hoped (like any girl or woman,) that they would love me forever.

It just didn’t and still hasn’t quite worked out that way….

It’s actually only when I suddenly realise, that they guy i’ve been chatting to, or dating, only see’s me as  a ‘bed notch’ or someone they daren’t date… It was only THEN…at that point, when I HAVE to  file the encounter under ‘casual,‘ and ‘take it on the chin,’ without being embarrassed.

So i’m accidentally, a sassy, sexy, modern day woman.

The ‘Brand’ goes alongside that….and that’s fine with me, as it makes me very ‘now.’ It gives me the necessary ‘street cred.’ I’m swag. I’m cool…I’m…Blah, blah….

You get it…

Y’see, when it comes to WORK, I am that. I’m fire. I’m determined. I’m ambitious. I’m a glamourous, kitty DIVA, sprayed over, in solid steel, showers of glitter. Champagne pops around me and naughty winks, fill my walk way…

When it comes to love…I’m the opposite.

I’m not someone who really wants random casual sex. I love sex. But i don’t play a numbers game. I want to feeel a connection.

Plus, If i’m honest, I can have sex with anyone… I have an inbox full of offers…almost every few minutes.

That doesn’t make me feel mighty. It’s flattering. I appreciate the ‘adoration..’ Of course I do….

If anything it stresses me out, because I think, ‘how the hell can I have so much attention and not find Mr.Right. That ONE MAN, who will truly love and treasure me forever?’

I’m ready to fall in love…

I’m just scared to….

It makes me anxious…

Anyway…

Away from all that…Sunday morning was great because before Meadowhall, I got to chatter to Lil’ Sam Reece. I shouldn’t call him ‘Lil’ as he’s pretty grown. He’s a good guy.  I’ve referred to him as ‘Tats’ on this blog before.

I like waking up on a Sunday morning to a Reecy phone ‘ping.’ We’ll just have brief morning banter. ..then get on with life. We chatter in ‘spits & spots’ a lot. We both always have really shit love lives…We’re both ‘Yorkshire.’ We actually get on well. It’s easy. We wired the same way. We have the same banter.. This Sunday we talked ‘car bonnets/hotels and flat caps.’ 

I was actually gonna meet him for drinks..But I ended up doing Meadowhall instead and he ended up doing boy drinks…

But he’s a good guy. So I have a lot of respect for our Sam. He’s a good buddy…I’d see Sam as the kinda guy, i’d go for a drink with and kiss in the elevator when no one was looking. Haha!

(That hasn’t happened, by the way, before you all get excited. But i’d definitely kiss him in an elevator…It’d be a waste of ‘sexy’ people, if not. I don’t like to waste sexy people. You only live once.)

Right! I’m off!

Have a fantastic Tuesday!!

I love you.

Chrissie x

ps/ I’m about to step up my game…So strap in!

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Those Little Phone calls….

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And just when you think everything’s turning a bit shitty, ‘The Gods’ throw you a bone and just like that you’re back to normal and life goes straight back to magical.

I feel like the luckiest tinker in the world.

Last night, I was so stressed. I was SO stressed, that I was stressing myself out. I don’t like a pity party. I throw them. But I don’t like them. I look at ‘dwellers’ in a bizarrely weak light. I’m not harsh with them, because everyone is different. I simply leave them to it.

My friends will also tell you that I’m rubbish at sympathy when other’s are throwing a pity party , because no matter what they’re going through, I’ve either been through it myself at some point, a million times over and know that all ends up alright in the end…Well depending on the experience and strength of the human. And I can see someone’s strength in a second.

Yet, after a moment of feeling sorry for myself, I kinda just snapped out of it and realized how lucky I was.  Then I figured that being stressed, was a complete waste of my time, (nothing is worse than wasted time.) So I got over myself, got over the dramatics, and the words of Jaden Smith, I..

‘Looked at the case and closed it.’

My phone rang this morning (after I slept on life and let the world take a turn) and the other end of my line said,

Agent: ‘I read ya blog. I have news. Good news! So, let’s get you back working and excited.’

I’ve had a fun Summer. A Summer that I needed to have. I don’t know why I had to have it? Yet, i’m really glad I did, because I got to enjoy it normally and simply just LIVE. I might have felt a little lost through it in parts. Yet, I’m SO glad, that I got to feel all that I did. I’m the luckiest girl in the world.

But in one second straight, I grew ten feet tall and burst into confetti with excitement.

I’M BEAMING.

I guess, the good thing about my life, is it’s never EVER easy and because it’s hardly that easy, i’ve grown and developed super fast. On occasion it’s fueled by cocktails, yet once work kicks in (and i’ve been on down time due to slow scheduling, book writing and delays)...I become ALIVE again and I’m simply at my strongest, when a schedule is put into place and the schedule involves everything I love, everything I know, everything new and everything that makes me happy.

I’m at my happiest right now and when that happens, I radiate a *glow,* an energy.

KatyP: ‘Look at you. You look so happy now, to be getting out of your down time.’

She said it with a smirk, that made me beam, because it was a smirk where in which no words were needed.

Those moments are magical.

If anyone can embrace a new chapter or a bit of the old ‘showbiz,’ it’s me. I couldn’t be more excited to have everything go back to normal. (Well my version of normal anyhow.) By nature, I’m a ‘toughy’ aren’t I? Yet, everything now is suddenly back in place and I  can way *b’bye* to a rowdy, Peroni dripped Summer and just get on with Girl bossing it again. Well, just get on with my  version of LIFE again. When it comes to life, I kinda learn it along the way. I never matters how old or young you are? How much experience you’ve had…makes you grown.

It’s weird how a phone call can simply change everything.

I had an inbox this morning from the this guy I dated when I was 18. I actually left him for LA and married another human, so he would have no reason to really be lovely to be a few decades on.

He’s actually done well for himself. I always say that i’m like some kind of juicy mojo, as all the guys that I’ve dated (aside from the lazy ones) have ended up doing really well for themselves, off their own back. I’m gonna go with it’s because i’m inspirational. They wouldn’t. Lol. Yet, if not, at least I gave them a point to prove.

I ignored the message, because it’s what I always do and let’s face it, I don’t want to be with him, do I. 

Yet, he came at me with a..

‘You can come over to mine, the kids can play in the pool, whilst you tell me how shit your life is without me.’

I admire the confidence. Yet honey, my life isn’t too shabby. 😉 Lol.

I don’t really have that much more to say, other than….

Here we go…

Wunna Land, IS BACK.

You’re always one decision away from a new version of Life.

 

 

 

My New Years Resolutions….

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Gosh! All this time off is making me go bonkers. It’s hilarious! I’m tottering around pestering and annoying innocent folk, just so my brain has something to do. Hahah! I’m like the kid that gets kicked out of glitter class (Wait? Hold up! I’d never get kicked out of glitter class? What the actual fuck IS glitter class? Lol Whatever it is? I wouldn’t get  kicked out of it.) But you get the picture, my system needs to get back to work mode in order to feel satisfied. I’m really excited because i’m about to go into a *juggle,* which is when you have lots to conquer all at once. It’s challenging, it’s fun.  Yet, right now all i’m doing is thinking and planning it all (which actually makes me panic as you can ponder things far too much) and being a FIRE sign, all the *pondering* gets boring after a while, when you have to wait to move forward. I’m an action girl…and therefore now, because i’m impatient…you are receiving a rant. Lol.

January always goes really fast! I don’t mean the ‘waiting for a pay day’ part, as I realize that most have spazzed their fine earned pences on cocktails. Yipppeee! Yet, when you have goals that you’re trying to fit in, in the first month, it’s always hard, as it *zoom* by without you consent and you have to double up in Feb.

I slept last night. I never can sleep, so that’s a good thing. But weirdly, I watched Chloe Khan’s snippets (lots of naked bits, boobie bits and sex bits) from her time in the Celebrity Big Brother House. Now, i don’t know whether she did that on purpose to gain ‘attention?’ If she did, well done, it worked and it took some fucking balls. It made her newsworthy. So the result, good or bad, was an attention winner. OR if she’s just like that as a human? Then I had a wine and wasn’t bothered anymore and fell asleep. It kinda made me learn that it’s what you do AFTER the snippets of attention have occurred that set task of longevity. My mind and soul must’ve been content with that knowledge and just conked out peacefully.

How was your New Year! I actually ditched my Slutty Sailor Girl outfit and Cockpit Pilot sexy wear, to simply stay home, with my babies. To the ‘Party Goers’ (and i am one to indulge in a good time, if it’s done right and in some form of luxury lol) that may sound dull. But to ME, it was heaven sent, peaceful, loving and bubbled my sail into 2017 with love. Their faces alone we’re adorable.

I will go on to tell you that LOVE MATTERS. It’s what makes you strong. Gives you a purpose. I’m a single mum, so the LOVE that I have for my children power me forward. Nothing compares to that! I’m ambitious, so the LOVE that I have for my ‘dream come true’ job and work radiates from my kitty soul like fire. The LOVE that I have for my parents, the people that gave me a foundation to grow, is deep rooted and dashed with the most sincere respect. The love that I have for having such hilarious friends, keeps my system light, filled with laughter and keeps me being a functioning alcoholic. Lol. It’s a fun love, as you need your ‘soldiers’ right by your side. They’re the people you tell everything to without *censor.*

We all know that i’m SINGLE and i’ve been single by choice because I just haven’t been able to find the correct male human to partner up with. Hahaha! Yes, i’ve been on dates, as usual, as they’ve come, and learnt a lot. Yet, i haven’t had that ‘chemistry’ that is essential to the way i think, move, or see the future…swing by me. Where i cn just be me and the get it! All great guys. All phenomenal people. But just not right for me. And i mean that both ways. As, I am also just not right for them. (Even if some of them haven’t seen that yet. 🙂 )

I get loads of messages from guys, as any girl would on social media, who may tickle anyones fancy, who read my blog and say that I haven’t have such a hardcore *tick list.* There isn’t a *tick list.* I just know what i like, need and want in another human being, that is so much more than a simple list, as it’ll be something i feel, when i see them and meet them. (HAHAHAHAH….That makes me sound pervy!) Just because i’m not willing to ‘just settle’ for ‘a bit right’ doesn’t mean i’m being tight. It just means that i’m doing what’s right for ME…and you can’t change that, because it’s working for me and i’m quite toolish and strong headed. HOWEVER, if YOU WERE Mr.Right, you wouldn’t want to change that would you? 🙂 As firstly, you’d be IT and secondly, trying to change a partner means you’re not getting it. You’re not accepting them for who they are with love and support. Nonetheless, I’m always quite willing to go on dates! Well…some dates. Lol. I LOVE meeting people.

I’ve gone on a rant haven’t I!

New Years Resolutions! What’s Yours?

I never usually make them, as I’m not good at confining myself to rules that i make personally. The little rules that I make for myself. If i find that i’m only answerable to myself, then there’s no hope, as I can handle Me telling myself off. Lol. I just end up hitting the glitzy *fuck it* button and having fun. (When i say ‘fun’ I simply mean doing the things that I love.) But if someone else gives me rules, I seem to be pretty obedient. It’s weird. Maybe because i feel more responsible and i’m not in the business of letting people down by nature. It makes me feel awkward.

But here they are anyway..

Wunna’s New Year’s Resolutions.

. EVERY DAY THIS YEAR do something proactive big or small that will help me get closer to my big goal. Work harder at it, basically.

. 20 minutes exercise every day. (I’m shit at going to gym, or signing up to groups, so it won’t be that. So it’ll just be some ‘show up to whenever’ class, or some run or something? I reckon i’ll be into Pilates. Lol

.EVERY DAY (because Karma’s ace) do a good deed for someone. Doesn’t have to be massive, as it’s the little things in life that make a difference. Hopefully it’ll come back on me threefold. If not, i’m not doing it again next year! HAHAHA. EVIL!

That’s it! As everything else in my life i do well. 🙂

I need a massage and to get my nails done today.

I’m back to work tomorrow. The sun is shining. The babies and my Mum and I are all off to The Frenchgate centre in Doncaster.

I’m excited to tell you about the stuff that I have going on in 2017. There will be a blog about it all. I’ll be telling you where i’m going, why I’m going and when as I go along also.

Do remember that you are able to cross life paths with me at ANY SINGLE POINT. Maybe life will just naturally guide you my way. But if not…purposely *bump* into Wunna land, have a good time with me and find yourself in this blog the next day! *The 2017 cast 😉 ) But this year, chrissiewunna.com will be becoming more interactive, as we all do life together.  I’m going to be focusing a lot on getting another rung up that success ladder…so bare with me.

Like i said there’s a plan, yet in life you never quite know what’s going to happen, do you? But everything i have ‘intended’ sounds pretty good. Lol.

Feel Free to bob on any of my social media profiles and share your New Years Resolutions with me.

FOLLOW ME ON TWITTER : @chrissiewunna

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Decent Humans, Corset Sex & Ponies

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So, we’ve all fallen off the tracks, a bit. I have a friend, on a diet, who today decided that they needed a cheese toastie because of ‘fuck it.’ Lol. I have another who was so passionate about writing a really pervy book about the story of their life, who now…has lost her ‘gusto’ about it all. I’ve been really shit at saving, (you’d think that I would’ve been good, but when you’re the head honcho of a family, money just seems to sieve through your fingers…plus, i’m still not over wasting dosh on my rubbish night out in Ponte Lol ) and well if nothing else, this is the time, when we should all get back on our broken down ponies and shimmie back on track with *Victory.*

Now, I’m a girl who oozes determination. I’m never one to stop in my heels, simply because somethings gone wrong and i’m certainly never one to give up on anything. Things have to be really bad, or the situation has been utterly, utterly negative for me to pack up my luxury pink suitcase, throw in my diamante towel and call it a day. I’m just not of that nature and as humans, we’re either people who fight, or people who give in. So, now, i’m just gonna do what I do best, in moments when my friends, loved ones, or myself feel weak, or have come across a minor hiccup…which is FIGHT. Yes, in kitten boxing gloves…but still…armed with a smile, a warm heart made of ‘lioness’ and a wink. You can’t get anywhere in life if you give up all the time.

Okay, one of the good things that happened was a moment. There was a moment today, a brief one, where in which a friend, who was feeling rather emotional, decided to hit *pause,* simply to tell me how much they appreciated my existence in their life…and moments like that, even though i may laugh them off, or deliver a response with sarcasm….mean so much to me. Y’know…they sort of looked at me with tears in their eyes, after saying lovely things to me, about myself (always good Lol) and said, ‘So yeah, if I was to describe you in three words…this is what i would say…’

I’m really great at listening…so I only can remember two. Hahaha. But one word was ‘uplifting’ because they felt that in times of trouble, i was the person who managed to pick you their pieces and glue them back together… (I do this alot, but without being mushy. It’s all charm, kindness, dashed in wit and humour.) The second word, they used was ‘Positive.’ By nature, i’m always positive. Even when i’m grumbly…i’m soul is pretty much still positive. I’m not a dark ‘deep place’ person. I’m light…and it’s the light in me that others weirdly find inspiring?

I can’t remember the third word, but it was a good one. Hahaha. Yet, just in that moment, seeing their eyes fill up and their confidence be able to say this to me, made my day worthwhile. The conversation ended with a ‘Okay, i’l stop being gay now,’ and then we had bacon butties, to steam roll over this odd, emotional moment. 🙂 (That’s a very ‘Yorkshire’ thing to do.)

Later on, during my day, I found myself giving another lovely advice on, what I call ‘corset sex.’ HAHAHA. Now, ‘Corset sex’ is pretty self explanatory, and GREAT if you’re a girl who may feel insecure about being fully naked, during sexytime. Boys dig corsets. Corsets make your boobs look bigger. AND more importantly…they hold in your wibbly bits, that we all have, when we’re being bent over in uncompromising positions, that only boys seem to find sexy. So, if you’re a little terrified of showing of that tum tum, do sexy time in a Corset. (I have a red one that I whop out in emergencies. Ben loves it.)

She looked up at me, all doughie eyed, beautiful, whilst eating something cakey Lol…and said, ‘But i can’t wear a corset ALL THE TIME.’ Yes, you can! Grab a variety of them, focus on your best bits and go for it!

Feeling sexy is the most important part to sex. When i don’t feel sexy, I just don’t put out…Simples!

So, there you have it….today you learnt how to be sexy with your wibbly bits, how to express kindness and also get back on that pony, when you feel as though you’re about to swirl down that plug hole. Do it all glamourously and you’re set for another month. We’ll come up with another plan at the end of Feb. Lol.

On the whole, by nature, i’m gobby, smiley, expressive, loud and opinionated. But I enjoy it when the people who truly know me, or the people who don’t manage to see the good bits about me…’uplifting, positive, inspiring.’ 🙂 I mean, you don’t have to walk around fully covered up, with a Bible passage in your hand and a gummy label, glued to your shirt saying ‘I’m kind,’ to be a decent person. I come in boobs, an Oriental wash, ten layers of fake tan, over eyeshadowed peepers, sarcasm and big hair. Someone once bought me a Bible and I lost it, but I still know how to be a pretty alright human being.