Robot Husbands, Sex & Miracles..

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Today has been one of those ‘miracle‘ kinda days. I haven’t been able to believe the luck that i’ve had, but i’ve been so grateful for it. I was little galloping around, doing *happy* dances, to no music and total strangers…who definitely now think i’m a lunatic.

I kinda started being positive, after a couple days of feeling worried (cos we do get worried don’t we?) Yet, just like magic, with a *wangle* of a wand and a little bit of a *wink*CONSECUTIVELY amazing things just started to happen….one at a time…ALL morning and hopefully. I even had a prosecco and let my eyes ‘fill up’ a little with glee.

Things aren’t always shit. Remember that. So if you’re going through a case of ‘da blues’ and I really hope you’re not…always remember it IS TEMPORARY. 

You’ve got a whole life to live and no one to answer to.

LIVE IT!

So, I’ve got a lot of shoots lined up and it’s all really exciting. I’m writing. I’m loving the blog and well i’m a ‘show girl’ at heart, meaning shoots are my forte. I love them. I live them…I just find it really fun.

(Hang on a second…I’ve just sat on a pocket rock. No…not a ‘pocket rocket,..’ 😉 that’s a whole different blog post… Junior..The littlest Wunna in all the land…my 4 year old son…Well, he gave every WUNNA in the family a rock , a stone each. They’re ones that he had found on his journies of being Junior. We all actually carry a rock around with us, at ALL times for good luck…I’ve just sat on mine. It’s jiggery jaggery and it KILLS!) 

This morning, I posted a whole bunch of photos and a video on all my ‘socials’ on me waking up…I’m not gonna lie. I did film it yesterday to post out today. I even sent it to someone last night before it went ‘live.’ Lol.

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Anyway, before 11am (it’s now noon) on my Facebook Fanpage the video had 13,000 views. And the thing that’s been so hilarious about the video is the simple fact that it weirdly shocked people?

I post a lot of pictures…sexy ones…because they’re MY favourite. I post them…People seem to like them, they certainly engage with them and I spend my entire day replying to comments (mainly to gents) around the merry world.

I put my pictures up first and the viewers of Wunna Land, went ahead and ‘liked‘…they ‘commented…’ they ‘engaged.’ It’s always pretty fast on my Facebook..almost like fire….which leads them to a ‘click’ onto my diary, this website…so they can find out more.

But as I posted my video, it was like everything *paused* for a second…Everyone tucked their ‘willies’ back in… put on their Sunday bests, got terrified, realized that I AM actually a REAL LIFE human. and not just a picture on their news feed, or a paragraph on a blog post, that they ‘maybe’ place as some kind of ‘social fantasy….’ (Hahaha. Listen to me talking about myself like i’m some kinda Queen of the world 😉 )

…AND THEY PANICKED.

It all became very real, very quickly…and my inbox has been inundated with the weirdest messages, from people who were shocked that i’m real???

I’M SO CONFUSED?

Who’dya think writes this blog? Lol

I post my own selfies…IT IS ME?

I just thought everyone was going to adore me…Lol…Yet, everyone was more shocked, than anything. And the video’s just morning ‘wake up and stretch’ video? It’s chilled. It’s glamourous. It’s me. (It’s also on my ‘Instagram’ so you can go see it there. 🙂 🙂 Follow me too, because growing an instagram following is harder than...(‘I’ll let you fill in something hard, I can’t think of anything right now…’

But yes, record straight. I’m actually a real life person. I know! How scary! No ones even talking to me today on ‘Insta’...like Twitter…. I’ll just have to wait until the American’s wake up and throw me some..

‘Hey Honey, Love the pics.’

I don’t really have anything else to say, other than the fact that you should totally believe in miracles. I’ve had the most remarkable morning. Eat clean. I’ve been eating ‘fresher than fresh’ and it has served my body delightfully. It’s the cleanest, sexiest rush of goodness. I’m glowing.

I’m also getting really worried because y’know I told you about that woman who married the ghost pirate because he didn’t believe she would ever find a good man….Well, last week i read an article that Robot Husbands were going on sale, so we can purchase and program our futures as women.

Now, I love all social development and I adore the amazing things that the world delivers,

YET, LET’S NOT BE IDIOTS.

Let’s find our *SWAG* a second. (Yes guys, there’s Robot Wives also.)

Surely everyone knows that love isn’t about robots and programming? Surely everyone believes that in the end, they’ll find their perfect match.It’s all about fate, timing and true love. Some find it faster than others…but it’s definitely not a race. Surely everyone in the world is NOT THAT LONELY!!!

I mean can you imagine ME, in my flipping living room listening to some Robot Husband, that i’ve had to get dressed and plonk on some chair, telling me that he ‘loves’ me, whilst we enjoy a homemade skinny cocktail together and watch ‘Dancing on Ice,’ as the kids look at me like i’ve finally COMPLETELY LOST THE PLOT. I mean they’re already like..

Ruby: ‘Can’t wait until I’m married and move to LA, so you don’t moan at me for not going to bed on time.. When are we gonna have a proper family…’

Junior: ‘If you ever get a Prince…Like a real daddy…don’t let him touch your boobs, cos they’re mine.’

And then even worst….when it comes to the ‘nookie’ part of the relationship…The part that as a 37 year old I actually adore. I’m sensual by nature…

CAN YOU IMAGINE ME, HAVING TO UNDRESS MY BLOODY ROBOT, DO SEXY EYES AND BECKONS AT HIM, (whilst he just sits there spewing out his..‘yeah baby you’re hot’ lines that i’ve programmed into him

… AND THEN HAVING TO CLAMBER ON TOP OF HIM FOR SEX. YES WITH MY REAL LIFE ROBOT HUSBAND…

WHAT THE ACTUAL…

Wunna land says it’s a no go….

I even had a conversation with my chick friend ‘Jilly G’ about it..

Jilly G: ‘It’s just like a man shaped dildo.’

Me: ‘No it’s fucking not. It’s not a dildo AT ALL. It has eyes. Creepy ROBOT EYES. My dildo’s don’t have eyes? Do yours?

Jilly G: ‘No..Lol..They don’t speak either..’

Me: ‘Oh? I might have one that speaks? Haha.’

Bottom line…I’ll wait it out, marry a ghost pirate, order 100 cats and cry myself to sleep before I EVER INVEST IN A ROBOT HUSBAND.

Love you,

Chrissie x

 

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Passings, Drama & Screensavers…

Things were quite emotional in Wunna Land today. I’m feeling strong and the best thing about feeling tough, is that you don’t give the *niggly bits* importance.

I was meant to head a little bit ‘down south’ today…However, due to life, two schedules couldn’t ‘tango’ as one. I hope they do shortly and…I hope it is JUST schedules and not anything more? But you can’t control the way two paths cross, you can only control you part of the jiggle…and sometimes even then….you kinda have to leave shit to rum.

But I’m happy and i’m the luckiest girl in all the land.

However, again…I was meant to head a little ‘southern,’ today but didn’t and ‘the didn’t part made me realise that sometimes things & situations time out exactly, how they’re meant to.

So, my Grandmother passed over Christmas. I wrote a blog about it and as a family, we all decided to still enjoy the festive season and fully LIVE LIFE….because we watched it slip through someone’s fingers….

Today, my Mum needed me. She’s hard as nails is my Mum, her heart is kitten soft, but she’s found this time quite difficult, yet marched on positively.

The wonderful thing about today, is that she didn’t say that she needed me, i just knew she needed me….and at the last minute, after a school run…I found her, parked up my car, jumped in hers and went with her, to go see my Grandmother’s body laid to rest.

Now, I am THE MOST SQUEAMISH, human being on the planet. I like to thing i’m all sass and ‘boss’ like, yet OH MY GOD, I’ll go through the ‘fandango’ if I have too, but I’ll flitter and screech. I’ll run for the hills barefoot and naked if I have tooo!  I’m brave like that. 🙂 You can count on me to save your life.

(I have my First Aid certificate and when a lady, who had cut OPEN her ACTUAL finger and needed the glamourous ‘FIRST AIDER’ to come to the rescue…I screamed, cried, ran off, had a panic attack and had to get a police man to save her. Lol)

Today, I had walked side by side, with my Mum, to go see my Grandma, who is no longer with us in soul, yet we had to walk into a room and see her body, dressed and laid….for the first time since her passing.

I’ve never done or seen anything like this in my life. I’m even having to breathe OUT, whilst telling you the story..and i’m gonna tell you that initially when the door opened….I panicked…I panicked….My brother panicked and had to run back to the car to breathe. Yet I stood there with my mum. My face blank and arms crossed.  (They say when you stand with your arms crossed you’re either feeling closed off, or insecure, even if you’re stood with a face as hard as nails.)

But I looked to my left and my Mum, who is the strongest person alive…filled up with tears…tears that she tried to control…..She cries, but only when she’s really upset…She doesn’t like to cry in front of me. I never know why?

We both slowly walk up to where my Grandma was laid, fully clothed, ready for Friday and I stood and watched my Mum say her final private words to her…..

Mum: ‘I need to pull myself together…It’s bad luck to cry…’

(We’re an Oriental family…and their are traditions that run through the Burmese…sacred ones, that are magical and enchanting. There’s a respect.)

Me: You can cry mum. She’s passed now. Her souls happy and gone…this is just her body..’

I said it soft, direct, yet warm and made no eye contact with my Mum…and in that moment she let go and cried….

In that moment, I wasn’t her daughter…I was her best friend.

In that moment, I couldn’t have felt stronger, happier and like I had felt and done all the right things, at all the right times…Everything felt really REAL. It was like a magic swirled around us and like the meaning of life hit our hearts.

It wasn’t a morbid time…I don’t want you to think that. It was a warm time, It was filled with support, unconditional love, true friendship, family and blessings.

My Mum smiled like she was going to be okay now. (My Mum’s actually a Doctor, so seeing a body laid to rest isn’t something that gets to her, like it would me…. But of course seeing someone who you love, laid their still, yet peacefully is always a little shocking.)

We said our final farewells. My Grandmother looked so beautiful. My Mother looked so beautiful. I overcame a really big fear…and I can’t tell you what because even though i’m telling you a lot about the moment, there’s a whole lot of emotion that I have chosen to leave out, out of respect.

But I overcame something huge today and as we walked away….we both breathed out and got on with our day, our life, with a much clearer understanding to the way the world works.

I’m never gonna spend another moment of my life unhappy, or unfilled, i’m gonna love everything close to me, with all of my heart. I’m gonna LIVE. I’m gonna make every single dream I have COME TRUE.

I’m gonna make sure that I am always loyal to my own beliefs and to never sell myself short, or let others treat me without care or disrespect. I’m gonna be the greatest MUM, that I can be…I’m gonna smash my career to the skies and back. I’m gonna love. I’m always gonna be the best version of myself. I’m will continue to cut out ‘the negative’ and simply because I don’t have time for it.

A friend of mine was being really negative towards me last night and I just thought ‘fuck this…’ and deleted the ‘chat‘ as their ramblings were drenched in melodrama…because they didn’t feel important in my world anymore….

What I can tell you from that conversation, is to make sure that YOU DO NOT TAKE ADVICE from people…WHO DO NOT KNOW your world, or what they’re talking about….

Me: ‘Stop speaking to me like i’m 17 and dumb…’

Friend: ‘I’m not. I actually think you’re really smart. You obviously don’t know me at all. We’re meant to be friends! Everything i’m saying to you is out of love…’

Me: ‘No it’s NOT. It’s about YOU…Not me. I’m fine. I’m happy. I’m doing well! I’d appreciate it if you didn’t come at me like that…’

Bottom line…I don’t give them advice on their world or how to do their life…So, trying to control my world and my life, when you know nothing about the ‘ins’ the ‘outs’ or the inbetweens….is pretty silly. If I need advice…I’ll ask. And friends aren’t meant to judge me, i’m sure???

But yes…that happened. Lol.

However, the rest of the day went on spritely as normal…It was a great day. I’ve laughed. I’ve jiggled. I’ve worked really hard. I have a few auditions coming up and unlike most…I don’t really prep for them…I just ‘canon ball’ in with my fingers crossed, giving it the old ‘Wunna Land.’ I’m a really lucky girl and when that’s dashed with charm, you’re alright. 😉 I’m juggling really normal things glamourously and i’m on top of it now…I’m even doing the school runs!! I never got to do the school runs before, due to the wrong kinda of schedule.

Lisa: ‘Hiya! How are you. I feel like I haven’t seen you in ages..but i’ve seen a lot of you…Lol.’

Me: ‘Lol…yeah I’ve been ‘attention’ building on Facebook.. So there’s boobs everywhere…But I love it. It’s fun.’

Lisa: ‘You’re not doing any harm…go for it. Hahah.’

Then we strutted to the necessary parts of the childrens school playground to pick up our ‘little ones.’

A lot is going on right now.

All good stuff and hopefully my wishes upon stars will all come true. But i’m working on it…I’m working hard.

THANK YOU TO EVERYONE WHO HAD FUN WITH MY COMPETITION AND MADE ME THEIR SCREENSAVER FOR THE DAY!

Every single person who sent me a screenshot will be receiving a personalized picture from me. ALL OF YOU. I’m shooting the pics at the weekend, so you should get them on Sunday, methinks. So do not fret if you haven’t got your picture yet!! They’re coming! I’ve just been busy and If i’m honest, I didn’t actually realize how many of you would take part! I have a very busy weekend of picture taking. Lol.

I appreciate it so much. It shows that there’s still tons of you who love to have fun! But i’m a woman of my word…so your pics will be with you, by Sunday.

It was meant to be in this blog, where I announce the winner….who will recieve a video message! However, due to sudden circumstance today, where my Mum really needed me….it will be in TOMORROW’S BLOG!

So watch out for it!

I love you all so much!

Thank you.

FYI/ Thursday’s pics…are GOOOOD! I love them!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Writers Block, Jiggles & That Little Bit Of Saffron

Dear Diary,

I have CRAZY WRITERS BLOCK! It’s awful! I mean, so much has gone on in the last few days, the last few weeks..that I don’t even know where to begin? I’ve been through changes. Great changes and i’m exactly where I want to be. Yet, I guess changes are always alarming on the old kitty system at first, aren’t they? Well until you get used to them.

It can be new starts, new chapters, new cities, new jobs, new relationships, new friends, new anything…They’re all great…Yet your soul jiggles about a bit, until you feel settled. Once you do settle…you become alive…you’re on fire. So, like myself, if you’re experiencing anything NEW, know that you’re fine, it’s good for you and when the ‘Jiggles’ settle, you’ll be dandy as prosecco pour!

HURRAH!

I have writers block.

I don’t know if it’s because my heads a bit of a muddle, like I said so much has gone on, all wonderful, yet still alarming? But my brain needs to *bloom* and hurry up with the blooming process…Lol, as right now it’s a bud and it’s closed tight!

All I know is that i’m happy. So that’s good going, isn’t it! And I haven’t done Dry January..and that’s also good going. 🙂  Everyone seems to have committed to it. Yet, I can’t strap myself ‘down’ to ‘don’t.’ My will power is amazing. It’s a gift from the Girl Gods. Yet, if I fancy a vino at 7pm after a long day, I’ll have one, be it January, Wednesday or Life.

Dry Jan IS GOOD FOR YOU. So, if you’re tinkering along with *can can* kicks…WELL DONE! Enjoy being healthier. It’s fantastic.

Oh and if you still have you Christmas Tree up..TAKE IT DOWN (I’ve just seen that my chick friend ‘Hustle Barbie’ hasn’t bothered to move her ‘tinsel tree’just yet. She should. Or at least get her buff boyfriend too!

I’ve got so much to tell you. Good news arrived on Thursday. Really great career news. I have all the most wonderful collaborations, that you’ll slowly see *oozing* through Wunna Land, but I have writers block…and it’s CRAZY! I HATE IT!

BLOOM BRAIN, BLOOM!

I still haven’t even told you about my time in London with Top LA Chef Ronnie Woo. (He’s one of my best guy friends, we grew up together in LA and when he flew out to London in December to shimmie in ‘she ma bestie bestie‘ Wunna Land, we literally had the BEST time together…even though his executive suite had a random ‘cage like’ upstairs level.

Ronnie: ‘I don’t see the point to it? There’s not even a view?’

Me: ‘It’s like a bouji cage. I love it. I’m stuck in a bouji cage.’

Ronnie: ‘Let’s go take selfies and get lunch…’

[Passes me a pink champers that he had brought back from Vienna.]

But, I’ll get around to that blog.

If I go back to that evening… when I left his suite around five o clock in the evening, so he could spend some quality time with his beautiful husband Doug…. I remember being stood outside Le Meridien (the hotel,) in Piccadilly, at the busiest time possible, on the other side of the glass revolving doors, as London traffic bustled by and the skies were now navy as they turned our world to night. Stars littered the skies above me. Taxi headlights and horns flashed by and *beeped.*

I was on my phone (what a surprise) and there was a guy, who I guessed was here on business from New Jersey stood to my left..just sort of wandering around and in front of me was a random 20 something, lost, Spanish girl, who had stopped to see if I could call her also ‘lost’ boyfriend, because her phone had run out of charge.

IT’S ANNOYING WHEN YOU HAVE NO CHARGE.

Of course, I helped. I’m helpful. I try to be anyhow. Sometimes, I’m shocking at being helpful. But most of the time, I help. I had to take his number down, add it to my Whatsapp contacts and then message him, before calling him, to tell him where his girlfriend was. Lol.

She’s Spanish, lost in London and needs help. I’m a glamour puss, found in London and helping.

A bit of a ball ache, but nonetheless, I’d hope someone woud help me, if I needed help?

I’d also ordered an Uber..So I waiting for my car to arrive. That’s why I was stood outside. Of course, my Uber driver called..and the Spanish girl, her name was Carmen, thought it was her boyfriend, so answered my phone…

In fact now I remember..the Uber driver said the word, ‘Car’….and we assumed that he said ‘Carmen.’ He had called from some weird number. She spoke to him in Spanish…whilst walking away slightly… on my phone. See, i’m SO TRUSTING!

When she got back, I read a text stating that my Uber had got cancelled because I wasn’t at my pick up point, I got charged for that…and Her boyfriend magically appeared out of nowhere…

YIPPPEEE!

So yes, she was safe and I had to order another Uber back to the station. (During this time, I had my agent and my London friends all calling my phone continuously to try and meet up..)

Me: ‘Erm..Hi…Yeah, I’m kind of a little stressed out right now…I’ll call you back.’

Other end of phone: ‘But when are you back in London?’

Me: NEVER! Lol.’

Agent: ‘Hi, it’s me..I’ve submitted you for this and I need you to go meet…’

Me: ‘I need a gin.’

Then the New Jersey business man to my left, had noticed that I had been somewhat thoughtful, decided that I was ‘kind’..

‘I saw that you were kind..’

…and had also decided that I was definitely the girl of his dreams. He offered to buy me gin at the hotel bar. He plays ice hockey also, or something? It was just moment, upon moment of ‘craziness.’

YET, the best part of that whole day, other than seeing one of my oldest friends from LA, was the fact that there was a moment outside Le Meridien, where I was stood on my own, just looking through my Snapchat story.

I was WEEING MYSELF at how funny Ronnie & I had been all day!

(I actually really can’t tell you many Ronnie stories, as they’re secret secrets and his brand is much ‘cleaner’ than Wunna land. Lol. He was sick. I wasn’t. He’s back in LA now and just cooked for a whole bunch of celebrities, across the pond in Hollywood and on the telly. There you go.)

But yes, the best moment, was the moment, when I stood outside the hotel, immersed in the  busy London life….(Everyone dashed passed me, like they needed to be home immediately) and well I must’ve looked really HAPPY, because I had accidentally been LAUGHING OUT LOUD, at MY OWN Snapchat Story and I must’ve been laughing so hard (YES, i WAS BUY MYSELF AND LOOKED LIKE A LUNATIC..A GLAMOUROUS LUNATIC) because two middle aged gentleman, both business men, both dapper, both gay, both looked really important….walked up to me, like they had known me for years, saw me, stopped their ‘busy’ and said,

‘LET’S HAVE A LOOK….What are you watching?’

And just like that, we were all STOOD around my phone, for a good fifteen minutes, pissing ourselves and watching my Snapchat story.

It was a really good moment and it shows that laughter brings people together. All of us together. It’s contagious. And yeah, I know that sounds cliched, like I make cherry pies in dodgy gingham pinnies and sell them for tuppence, over the magical ‘pot of gold’ rainbow…But i’m not that way, I’m sassy. So, what i’m saying is…I mean it. 😉

Me: ‘It was total Cage Life!!’

Business Men: ‘Hahah….You are the cutest thing ever! We should grab a drink! Who’s he? He’s HOT. How do I know you?’

Moments make memories…

I’m doing alright for Writers block right now!

ANYWAY…

I’m currently sat in my car with a pink laptop on my knee, in a Little mistress Faux Fur, typing this blog out on WORD. I’ve been trying to blog for days! So any opportunity that I get to AT LEAST attempt to ‘chitter…’ I embrace.

It hasn’t worked until right now.

I have going on this week. I’ve been reading about little Saffron Drewitt Barlow, who is celebrating worldwide headlines, due to being the FIRST EVER little lady, to be registered as having TWO FATHERS and NO mother, in Britain…and I LOVE IT!! She’s 18 now and is the luckiest girl in the world.  She’s owning it! She has a wardrobe worth a million pounds, thanks to her Dads…who couldn’t love her and all her brothers and sisters more.

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She gets an allowance of around FIVE THOUSAND POUNDS A MONTH, to spend on anything her heart desires. There’s a dream and she is living it! I’m loving it!

But away from that, what her Fathers Barrie & Tony have achieved is SO IMPORTANT, as they’ve fought their cause, worked hard and now made history! They’re filled with love…I adore them..madly!

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It’s almost like a bouji, modern day fairytale. (There’s a magic to it! A ‘glitter.’)

Surely they adopt me? I’m marvellous! 🙂 Honestly…I am!

Can you even believe that only a few years ago, it was actually  ILLEGAL for adults, who loved one other, to ‘marry’ if they weren’t straight…let alone have a family!

It’s crazy, isn’t it! I love how much more open the world is becoming. I love that people are celebrating love, themselves and their own version of life.  I don’t think there’s anything wrong with telling the world your story. I do it every day….(When I don’t have writers block. 😉 ) 

I’m behind them all the way! The family is great! They’re so interesting! And yeah, we should absolutely celebrate a bit of Saffron! I love her! It’s magical!

Okay, i’m bored of being sat in my car now…

So, just a quick note to say THANK YOU for all the love, that i’m receiving on my ‘socials.’

I say it everyday…THANK YOU. If you’re not following my ‘Socials’ and you should be…Here are some of the pics, that you’ve missed…

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It means a great deal…as i’m obviously attempting to build Wunna Land to it’s finest and your ‘love..likes…follows and website clicks’ make a HUGE IMPACT. What am I on about? MAKE ALL the impact! That’s the truth!

A thousand MORE of you ‘liked’ my Facebook Fanpage this week and in the business of blogging, that means a lot! So yes, THANK YOU, from the bottom of my kitten heart. (Glad you’re liking my pics. 😉  You’ve got some good ones tomorrow… Oh and the ‘fitting room’ situation…Is it deliberate? YES! And you, my little ‘winks’ will found out why shortly!

Right, i’m off to deal with my now ‘moderate’ writers block, to ‘food a little‘ with my Mother. The Great Wunna before me.

Hope you don’t start your juice cleanse with a Mimosa like did. Hope you don’t drink too much coffee (which is what my body lives on…) as it makes you do stupid things….faster….

Love you all. Thank you for following my life. I need to get my bloggers flow back.

Kisses,

Chrissie x

 

 

Fights, Willies & Wunna Land

Life is currently great! I am in THE BEST mood ever. Technically, last week I was a jazzy bit hormonal, however now i’m all roses and winks. I’ve surfed the wave, had a word with myself and now i’m  back on the winners track. Things are great! I’ve had a lot on my mind over the last few weeks. Those niggly things that need to get sorted, that you box and ‘pretty bow’ to the back on your head in merry ‘trying to not deal with’ storage.

‘I’ll deal with them later.’

After a chat, a sprinkle of finally taking my life by the reins again and committing to only doing the things that make me smile, I kinda felt like an entire burden had been lifted from me by ‘The Gods’ (hot ones in togas)…and it came as a shock, because I didn’t think that brief moment of chat or decision making would make me feel as happy as it did. I as kinda scared of it. Yet if anything, in that moment I PROVED that you should only do the things that you love. The things that you were made for. If you don’t or if what you’re doing doesn’t eventually lead or guide you to where you see your future…If it doesn’t help your future at all…then not only are you wasting your time, but you’ll never feel fulfilled. You’ll miss your happy place. I’M actually talking about work in this case, yet this goes for literally anything..be it work, love or life…which we all seem to take for jolly granted.

This year, I’ve committed myself to taking chances, doing what I love, focusing on work and falling in love. I’ve changed a lot and it’s been nothing short of amazing. It makes you feel powerful. And it’s that feeling of internal POWER that makes you successful. Why? Well, because you’re happy IN ALL AREAS of your life. If you don’t have the ‘snazzle’ of everything, in balance, then you are wibbly. And when you’re wibbly, you fall much faster. 😉

Let me take you back to Friday….

Me: ‘Who is she even messaging…?’

Double B: ‘Some guy…she’s stalking him…’

Me: ‘Why are you secretly stalking him…Lol? You’re literally rewatching his Snapchats lovingly, with gentle creepy smiles.’

Hustle Barbie: ‘I can’t help it! Haha. He’s so…He’s just a baby though. Too young.’

Me: ‘What happened to funny Bald Dave or whatever he’s called?’

Hustle B: ‘No, i’ve gone off him now. He’s not being responsive! HAHAHAH!’

(It’s hilarious because Hustle Barbie is an extremely attractive blond. She’s hot. Guys fancy her. They buy her gin and lillies. And Funny Bald Dave…who she stalked for a bit because he was…well funny… DON’T ASK…in my mind… would be PUNCHING AND THEN SOME….So if Hustle Barbie was to send you a message…you’d probably respond immediately…Surely you would? I don’t get it Bald Dave. She’s going through this weird phase of internet stalking the lesser male. Hahahah.)

Double B: I had sex last night. First time in FOUR MONTHS.’

Me: ‘Look at you! Hahaha. You actually gave him some? Why? What happened?’

(Double B has been in this longterm 3 year relationship with ‘J’, who I think is hilarious. They are both so ideally suited, and part of a young ‘let’s spend thousands of pounds at *Ralphies* in 3 hours’ couple. Such a great match. She never gives him sex though…and he still adores her madly. EVEN THOUGH, he definitely wants a bit of nookie.)

Double B: ‘I dunno. I just felt sexy…’

Hustle Barbie: ‘…because we were all talking about sex yesterday.’

Double B: ‘ I wanted it , so just grabbed his willy. It’s put me in a good mood. I should do it more often.’

Me: ‘Why don’t you have sex with him?’

Double D: ‘Cos it usually lasts about a minute..’

Me: ‘Cos you never give him any…’

Hustle Barbie: ‘I always know when Alex wants sex, because he’ll come out the shower and leave his clothes off and then lay on the bed butt naked…It’s normal to not have sex when you’ve been together for a long time.’

Me: ‘No it’s not! Lol. The longer you’re with them, the better sex gets.’

Double B: ‘I’m definitely having sex more often. He’s just text me to tell me that he’s taking me out to dinner now.. Did you know that when men get older their willies get darker…!!’

Me: ‘No they don’t….Haha.’

Hustle B: ‘What dya mean darker? How old?’

Double B: ‘Like at 70…the older they get, the darker their willy gets.’

Me: ‘How do you know what a 70 year olds will looks like? They’re not white and all of a sudden have a big black willy. Lol’

Hustle B: ‘I’m snapchatting this…. Say it again…’

And she did…that’s what I love about Double B….she’s ever the showman…as am I!!!! She’ll perform in the name of humour and it’s GREAT!

Me: Ugh…I’ve got to try and build my Instagram following….’

Double B: ‘Is that why you’re posting so many selfies…Lol..’

Me: ‘Yes…Hahaha. Add me! Add me! Love me! Love me!’

I sailed into the weekend…The suns out….It’s now Sunday, but I sorted another little ‘niggly’ mind box out before the weekend sprung…and again felt much better for it. I’ve made loads of decisions, ‘cut and dry’ ones over the last 2 days…and It’s made me BEAM because i chose to stay loyal to what I believe is right.  I’m quite composed and I’ll never really let people see what’s going on when they’re around me if i DO have ‘niggly’ bits going on in my head. That’s why I find it easy to write things out, because you can’t actually see me. Lol. In person i’m fun loving, laid back and pretty much always positive…I’m a laugh…Yet, I never left people see me ‘not okay.’ But one of the great things about me, is that I make decisions quickly. I always know what i want and when I know, I will whole heartedly commit to it.

Saturday morning felt wonderful. I was gleefully wallowing in the happiest of moods. I felt glamourous. I felt powerful. I felt like I had everything under control. I had a meeting, went through the Wunna Land plan. I never tell you my plans, as I always think you shouldn’t…as in a ‘Social’ climate you have to be able to meander and change plans accordingly at a drop of a stiletto. I’m fluid like that. But I’ve been patient and i’m not always too patient. I’ve learnt to be. I now don’t strike before i’m ready. I’ve spent a good amount of time ‘building’ Wunna land and make sure, I’m mot steady on my heels, but SOLID on them, so I stay on my feet. I sipped a couple cocktails. I’ve concentrated on what I’m doing and not what anyone else is doing…

Meeting: ‘Who else do you know…that you can name off the top of your head, literally off the top off your head, who is doing what you’re doing…as well as you’re doing it…..right now?’

Me: ‘Well…

Meeting: ‘And I don’t mean bloggers and all sorts…There’s tons of people trying their luck at it all …and I don’t even mean people who are different to you, who are doing it extremely well…I mean IN YOUR NICHE…’

Me: ‘Well no one…I can’t think of anyone at the top of my head. I mean there must be someone? I just haven’t really searched for a rival of sorts. I’ve just been zoning in on what I’m doing, not what they’re doing…and the shit thing is, I don’t read anyone else’s blog. That’s not true, I read one and i’ve been reading a whole bunch of memoirs. But there’s room for everyone…it’s Cyberland…There isn’t just one good blog about this one thing…on the whole of the internet.’

Meeting: ‘In Cyberland….in life in general….that’s true. In business….and you’ve turned your life into a business…IN YOUR NICHE…there is only room for ONE. You’ve done it the exact same way, that I did, you found your own way…again in a niche that is unique to yourself. You’ve made something old school, like diary writing.. MODERN.  In business, there’s room for one…there’s always a Bride and a Bridesmaid.’

Luckily, I’ve been a Bride millions of times…Lol…so I think I have this down.

A great meeting with my mentor. He is a very successful person, a very famous person, I knew them personally waaay before anyone did, when they began their own little blog, that they turned into a multi million dollar business. It’s good to have someone who has done what you’re , believe in you madly. Not only does it make you feel guided, but it makes you strong.

Then I got dressed, sent a Whatsapp message to ‘The Swirl’ wishing him good luck and better ribs…I like him. I find him really interesting….I’m hooked…..and with a stroke of my new baby kitten Rocco, I ventured into the world…to live!

It’s now Sunday. I watched the Mayweather/McGregor fight. I rooted for Mayweather all the way. I love a champion and I kinda didn’t want his Champion title to get smudged. He’s really the only one that had anything to lose. McGregor is good at what he does, they’re both great at what they do. Yet he’s not a boxer and well he was GREAT PR when it came to getting folk excited. They both made a shit ton of money and life is still great.

I love the Live  Celeb quotes from the fight that night…Like 50 Cent who watched McGregor cuddling Mayweather from behind, for a moment, was like, 

‘What the fuck is going on…..Haha….Okay Floyd, just knock this fool out.’

I like that he went in for a bit of a cuddle. He’s hard out there in that ring. Lol. Wait…I’ve made that sound rude by accident.

But even better, Jamie Foxx (who once gave me advice in LA on ‘how to handle boys, now i was bouji’ lol) posted an ace Instagram video about his choice of Fight Shoe, which was a  Gucci Fur Slipper. Lol. You need to watch it. It’s hilarious and fricking FOLLOW ME, whilst you’re at it.

Bloody hell. 🙂