Taxis to Angelica, Sam Reece & Curly Blows…

So, I walk out the ‘back room‘ door, now armed with a pink vodka… I thank Gemma, for my ‘back room’ shindig…and Sam Reece walks out of the loo door, at the exact same time. He’s in a hat, skinny jeans….and let’s face it, he’s a much talked about ‘handsome’ that the ladies can’t help but adore…They all love a bit of ‘The Reecey,’ because he *oozes* a charm that is almost magnetic.

All the charm. All the *ooze.* All the hats?

Yet, I needed to go find Sophia…because I’d been meaning to speak to her all night. So, I had to totter off, by the now performing dancing ‘Gatsby Girls,’ who were body popping with ‘ooh faces,‘ tassels and winks galore.. and the poor kittens had to do all that ‘jiggery,’ toย  a crowd of Reality TV faces…

Me: ‘Hiya! I wanted to come say hello. I JUST missed you in Spain. Literally as you were just getting onto Spanish soil, I was getting into a taxi back to the airport!

Sophia: ‘I know! I wish I had seen you! It was a good time. I wish I would’ve shot with you too!’

Me: ‘I know. Great combo. I love you. I’ve been watching ya stories.’

Now, in case you didn’t know. I adore Sophia. She’s young and currently on this series of ‘Ex on The Beach’ on MTV. She’d just had a drink ‘swilled’ in her face on the telly the evening before and she reigns by the last name ‘Filipe.

‘I’m Portugese.’

She’s a DREAM. After speaking to her, she is LITERALLY one of my favourite chicks ever. I just love her. So, I need to drink with her again…and will absolutely stalk her until she’s free. ๐Ÿ˜‰

We chatted for quite a while and for someone who’s brand new to all this ‘on the telly,’ entertainment marlarky, she is the most savvy, together, and hilarious girl i’ve met. She’s quick witted. She’s fun. She’s smart. She’s a glamour puss, yet… like moi, (even if I do say so myself,) she’sย one of the most ‘down to earth‘ chicas, you’re ever gonna run into. I could’ve chatted to her all night. Yet instead we pissed ourselves.. at OUR OWN rubbish sense of humours, giggled with ‘Marlie Weekender’ and bantered with the super sweet Joe Angus, (who is set to be the new ‘Scotty T.’)

Me: ‘Have to told Scotty that!’

Joe: ‘Yeah…Haha. I saw him in a club.’

Joe was actually really sweet…I don’t know how to describe him? He seemed sweet like ‘apple pie.’ He’s Geordie and sensible, but still giddy and fun. He’s one of the good guys…all responsible, all ‘on time‘ and shit… and offered to drive people everywhere….because he’s kind like that. Lol. He even brought a hoodie, to keep himself warm and normal. ๐Ÿ™‚ If you grew up in LA, he’s like what we used to refer to, as the ‘Good Midwestern Boy.’ย But he’s British…and from Newcastle.

Get it? Good!

Long story short…The night at ‘Weaves & Waves’ was coming to an end…We’d all at so much to drink. We’d all embraced a bit of an event…and just now needed MORE, MORE MORE….As per usual…everyone fancied going for a few more drinks around Leeds. So fuck it…we did. Everyone always pretends like they’re deciding, and just goes anyway. ๐Ÿ˜‰ (That always happens at events.)

I was chatting to ‘Marlie Weekender..’

Marlie: ‘My Mum is literally the best photographer.Honestly, you don’t even know. She’s like…pose like this. Pose like that…. I don’t know if I like the guy that I brought? I mean he’s hot, but he’s not that social.

Me: ‘She’s like your Momager. Lol. Which guy? Oh him? He’s hot. Why do I feel like a drag queen right now?’

Karl: ‘I like you. You make me laugh…Why don’t you come over here?’

(We start walking over to his crew of ‘friendlies.’)

People started getting into taxis, left, right and centre to….

‘Shall we meet at Angelica’s?

But I followed Karl, because he was gay and that’s what happens, in my world…

Anyway,ย  I start chatting to his friends Zara, a guy in a cool flat cap (i’m so sorry, I forgot your name) and Sam…(as in ‘Reece.’) They’re all hair stylists and work at a salon in Sheffield…I think it’s called ‘Creator.’ They came as a ‘crew.’

Banter, giggles, whispers and those moments when you don’t know the person you’re conversing with too personally, however you’re liking them, BUT still sizing them up.

‘Why does that dude, look like he’s poured himself into that shirt?’

Me: ‘Hahaha. I like that. His jeans are too skinny though! God!’

Karl: ‘Haha. I love you.’

We all decide to go for ‘one more’ at Angelica’s…But Sam can’t fit me in his car…

Sam: ‘I don’t have enough room in the car.’

Zara: ‘Meet us there…’

Me: ‘Can’t I just fit in the boot? I’m Asian. I’m fine with that.’

Then as everyone kept passing me shit loads of cocktails, to try and ‘finish up,’ and Weaves & Waves were on a ‘Key Hunt.’

‘Why is the key in Manchester???’

I jumped into a taxi with Rick (who organised the event)..

Rick: ‘Chrissie. I like you. It’s funny. I didn’t expect to. Did you win the Paris Hilton Show…’

…and the sexy Emma Woodhams…Who had definitely decided mid journey that she maybe hated all men and that she was definitely Beyonce in her ‘Destiny Childs’ days…

‘Look at me. I am.’

(Notice how everyone doesn’t expect to like me….Lol.)

We couldn’t find Angelica’s for ages. I asked everyone. Rick ran up and down escalators the wrong way, Emma danced and we maybe found Lego Land, whilst singing. I’ve been to Angelica’s 1 million times…so the fact that I couldn’t find it, means cocktails stole my soul.

Me: ‘This is like following the yellow brick road…TO HELL. How have I ended up with you too?’

Then a random helpful dude, pointed at a neon sign above, like it was a sign sent from the Gods…it read…

‘ANGELICA.’ ๐Ÿ˜‰

And after what felt like a marathon, three trip ups, another escalator, a donkey, 42 piggy back rides, a ‘tuk tuk’ wave down… and 42 lifts… We got there…

Me: How the FUCK, do we get to that SIGN…!! Are we…?’

Random Lady (as the elevator door opens):…’Yes, you’re here..’

Prosecco was poured. I spotted Sam, Zara and ‘le crew’ over at a table…we ‘eye clocked..’

But Rick had decided to order us all prosecco, so under the stars, on the roof terrace, we all chatted life, as we pondered our existences.

Me: ‘Right, I’m gonna snapchat the table, so if any of you are doing or saying things you don’t what people to hear…DON’T.’

Everyone laughed…then stopped sinning, for exactly 10 seconds.

NO Filter.

After banter, I decided to go back to chat to Sam and crew….

‘I’m off over there now…’

…who decided to shimmie onto the roof terrace anyway.

Zara: ‘We’re going after this one.’

They ended up staying…and it ended up being really fun. I love to chill and just drinky sip, as I chitter….It’s like the perfect scene for a bit of Wunna Land.

Zara: ‘So have you two known each other for ages?’

Me: ‘No.’

Sam: ‘No…We’ve just met tonight. In fact, I don’t even know you’re name…What is it?’

Zara: ‘Oh? I thought you two had known each other for years…’

Sam: ‘So you’re a blogger, right? Are you in Leeds, cos i’m just in Sheffield? I really like Leeds.’

Before conversations and sitting down on the evening rooftop terrace began, he had to REMOVE the pure sheepskin throw that was laid on his seat…He did so by just chucking it on the floor, in a good old lothario fashion…

Sam: ‘It might have bugs in it… Haha.’

Me: ‘Don’t tell me that, when I’ve got half my arse on it..’

My bum cushioned that flipping sheepskin. It probably thought it’s Mama was back for a nuzzle.ย  Sam can make ‘throwing sheep’ off chairs look sexy. I just sat on mine…I’m a glamour puss, but sometimes my arse just needs to chill…ย  then had to pull tables across….. so everyone could fit.

We’re all talking. I’m getting to know everyone. I’m warming up to Zara, because she’s a ‘tough crowd’ when she’s around idiots and bullshit. She doesn’t like it. She’s straight forward, direct and actually lots of fun. I loved her. She’s northern, like moi and will literally just ‘tell it how it is.’

Zara: ‘I just can’t deal with bullshit…and they’re bullshit.’

Me: ‘She’s cool though. The rest of them seem really young.;

Sam: ‘Yeah, I like her. She’s banter like a lad…’

By this point, a gaggle of girls had surrounded the table, all giggly and young, they were oozing with absolute delight, BUT WEIRDLY trying to pretend that they didn’t know who Sam Reece was…Yet, knew his name was ‘Sam Reece’ because the fucking said it enough. ๐Ÿ˜‰

This is all you could hear for the next 10 minutes…

‘Are you Sam Reece?’ Sam Reece? It’s Sam Reece. Is it Sam Reece? Sam Reiss? No, Sam Reece. Sam Reece! What do you do? I thought you meant Reiss? As if it’s Sam Reece…Are you Sam Reece…’

Then everyone asked for a ‘Curly Blow.’ ๐Ÿ˜‰

Sam: ‘It just sounds so naughty. Hahah.’

Me: ‘I know. I love it. Hahaha. I want a curly blow.’

Zara: ‘I don’t know how he deals with that…’

(Some girl was tossing her hair in Zara’s face and sat in her seat…so it was all awkward and hysterical, to watch.)

But let me tell you about Sam. The most politest, almost calm, bit of gentleman…served in the style of ‘male model,’ย NOT sat on sheepskin, easy going…down to earth…God of all sex appeal. He’s confident, he’s not afraid to try and win a lady over….even though he’ll do so with swag. It’s delivered with a handsome banter… a chilled directness….almost a determination, that doesn’t make him look foolish. He likes to get what he wants, but his soul is good. He’s definitely one of the good guys, yet there’s an ambition in his eyes…Easiest person to talk to…Northern..

You can’t help but like this guy… I mean for someone who’s quite prejudged…and i know how that feels….he’s extremely likeable…

And I only know all this, because well all accidentally had to become his ‘wing man‘ and we were all shit at it. No. I take that back. i’m really good at being ‘wing man.’

We all ended up going home after a few more…We definitely didn’t let anyone get in our elevator… A girl was screaming for us to wait to get into our lift…and it looked like she’d be ages and have 40 friends and Elvis with her…

Sam: ‘I can’t be arsed with that….shut the doors… Haha.’

Then everyone decided to wait for me, on Boar Lane, because my car had got lost…and I couldn’t describe where I was appropriately.

‘I’ve just walked out Trinity and now i’m by Mcdonalds and Nandos…on the corner…’

Zara: We’re waiting because we want to. Don’t be silly. I’m not leaving you here. Shut up, you.’

Me: ‘I’m fine. Just go..’

And because i’m obviously shite at directing anything, Sam takes my phone out my hands…and like some tattooed ‘all together’ hero, starts chatting and solves my first world….’where is the driver’ issues..

‘Is it that Range Rover? It’s here.’

Everyone gets kisses, everyone makes sure I get home safe….THEY go on to Fiber…I get my sorry ass home.

I’m actually at their salon on Thursday….And I’m really excited to see everyone again.

The reason why I loved the ‘Weaves & Waves’ event so much, was that it was actually filled with people, who I loved. That hardly happens….And, it was great because everyone there was ‘alive’ and everyone their was filled with personality. They were all open and easy going…which makes a blog really fucking easy. ๐Ÿ˜‰

 

 

My Airport Jiggle to a Sassy Spanish Getaway

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Whatsapp Msg: ‘Morning!’

‘Morning!’

So on April 5th at exactly 4am, my alarm went off, my *wake up* call shimmied and I started getting ready, glamming up, sorting the last bits of packing, wishing that I had a morning mimosa and that was before I kissed the babies, whilst they were still asleep and dashed out the door, with only two pieces of hand luggage ( I always travel light, I’m not a ‘take the pope and the kitchen sink’ kinda gal.) Myย driver pulled up, greeted me like he was the perkiest, most stylish human ON EARTH to ever do 4am…and with a…

‘It’s lovely to meet you…Let me take your bags…’

I stepped into his ‘RS’ and we travelled to Leeds/Bradford airport, so I could get my pretty arse on that flight to Spain.

Wooooooooohoooo!

(I don’t know why i’m shouting ‘Wooohooo’ because I pretty much had a panic attack and got super nervous, the evening before for no real reason, other than being a girl. Yipppeee.)

So, for my airport runs, I used Pit Stop Rentals. (You can search them on INSTAGRAM.) They’re a prestigious, super car, chauffeuring company, who pretty much make sure you get to your destination stylishly, in good time and whilst catering that time to your needs.

I’m a service girl. You all know that from this blog. You can be 2 Star orย 5 Star brand, if the service is poor….I’ll never use that company again…and I guess,ย  it’s is scary territory for some, as they’re very aware that I write a blog. ๐Ÿ™‚ But always great for me, because I mostly get treated deliciously. Lol

We chatted all the way to the airport, as the dawn turned to day. Clear roads. Easy run. Not traffic. Just bliss. I love travelling at that time. We laughed, We joked. He asked me about my career. Why I was headed to Spain? He gave me really good life tips! And it was great because he settled my nerves and not only made me feel really comfy, yet also kinda made me feel extra confident and somewhat powerful. I needed that.

So, i’ll give them MEGA POINTS for service. It was literally like an airport run with ya best friend AND therapy IN ONE…and you know what I’m like, I’ll chat to anyone, about anything….He did great to put up with my ‘extremely glammy’ ๐Ÿ˜‰ย  shit.

As soon as we pulled up…my driver then let me take a gzillion selfies, and let me Snapchat and Insta story my entire journey t….as he turned up the tunes and enjoyed the show! Lol

Driver: ‘Make sure you get chair in! Aw! As if you accidentally deleted the best one.’

Me: ‘I know, I hit the wrong thing.. Are you going in it?’

Driver: ‘Nooo. I don’t have my sunglasses. I’ve been up since 4am.’

Me: ‘Yeah, but you don’t look like shit. You’re hot!’

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By this time, everyone in the car park was glaring at us, so I made the executive decision to quit being a twat and just get myself into the airport. ๐Ÿ™‚ There’s no shame in my game. I’m a ‘You only live once, so make your story worth it’ piece of chicken. If you want to watch…WATCH. It’s only when you scowl and watch that makes me think you’re ‘judgey.’

Now, when i’m chatting service…My Pitstop Rentals Driver, not only grabbed my bags out the boot for me, BUT also carried them all the way into the airport, through the airport, (I had already ‘checked in online‘ with myย Jet2.com app,)ย he helped me avoid the queues, by chatting to the Jet2 representatives for me, and then sat me down, in a cafe, (because I was super early for my fight ,)ย and BOUGHT ME a large coffee and a muffin! Lol.

Is that like the best service on EARTH or what???

Then we started just chatting in general about life. He aske me about my world, my love life, my job.

‘You’re the luckiest girl in the world. I would love to have woken up this moment, and be jetting off on a Spanish getaway for a couple days for… And to have had a career young, where you just casually moved to Hollywood to be a model… Lol.’

I asked HIM about his life and found out that he enjoys all things ‘bouji’ and that he DOESN’T TRAVEL LIGHT.

Me: ‘I always travel light, because I have non working arms and if I need to get away fast, I can. Lol’

Driver: ‘That’s a good idea… I don’t know why i’m agreeing, I DON’T actually ever travel light ever. I’m like a chick. I had a 2 night stay in a hotel, took everything in the world, filled a car, took 4 changes of shoes, my slippers, dressing gown, 2 tracksuits, 4 shirts… 3 pairs of jeans….Two wedding outfits….Lol’

It was like the GQ version of ‘The Hungry Caterpillar,’ the part where he just stuffs everything in his belly.

Yet, I enjoyed that could say the word ‘bouji’ and he totally got what I meant, without question, as sometimes people look at me like i’m speaking a whole different language. And I know when people are just pretending to understand what I’m saying to them. ๐Ÿ˜‰ He wasn’t.

Time flew…and before you know it, we headed to Security, to get through the the Boarding gates. Just so I didn’t have to wait…he paid for me to FAST TRACK through , because the lines looked so horrific…and

OH MY GOD! IT WAS A GOO JOB HE THOUGHT OF THAT!

(At that point he left me to my own devices….as I scheduled in my return pick up…)

‘Thank you so much, I really appreciate everything. I’m back on Saturday at 7pm.’

‘It’s been a pleasure thank you. See you then!’

So, I fast track through to security…and from that point it all goes *TITS UP.*

I get to the security, plonk all my stuff in the trays…that goes through to be examined…

There’s things in my luggage that i’m not allowed to take on the plane, so that get’s put to one side, to be opened up and looked through.

I BLEEP at the ‘walk through,’ so I then have to wait to be patted down and mini searched.

By this time, it is now BUSY AS HELL! There’s what feels like a gzillon people, trying to rush through security.

It takes so so, because it’s so busy, that as my flight is boarding…I’m still at security WAITING FOR MY BAG TO BE OPENED UP AND LOOKED THROUGH.

I was there so long, that my gate was now no longer boarding, BUT CLOSING!!!

By this time, I’d won the support of the crowd, who were all rooting for me to get on this plane…and offering me all kinds of help…and letting me push in.

But no pushing in is allowed…as the have to do everything in order…

So, I did what any ‘Diva’ would do…I asked nicely….I asked nicely again, in the most politest manner.

‘I am so so sorry, as I know it’s not your fault, because it’s really busy and just you having to go through everything…But my gate is flashing *closing* and my bag hasn’t been checked through…’

There was nothing he could do…and to be honest, I got that…But I ‘Glamour Pussed’ him in the eye and he gave me a look like he wanted to help and needed to help…but wasn’t allowed to.

An middle aged couple almost ‘begged’ him to let my bag be searched ahead of their bad. But then the big grumpy boss came over and reiterated that ‘NO SPECIAL TREATMENT‘ was allowed…(which is true Lol…But if I can work it, I will.)

Grumpy but right Boss: ‘Do, not let her put her hands in her suitcase!!! It’s not allowed.’

So after I realized that….I did what any little ‘DIVA’ from the Orient would do (because I wasn’t gonna miss that flight and I wasn’t getting my own way.. )

I KICKED THE FUCK OFF! ๐Ÿ™‚ HURRAH!

‘I have been WAITING HERE FOR HOURS! My gate had boarded and almost CLOSED IN THAT TIME. I’M GONNA MISS MY FLIGHT AND i KNOW YOU DON’T CARE, BUT THIS IS NOT OKAY!!!’

I kinda said it shouty…

And weirdly, it was my turn for my bag to be checked through…It got opened, sent back through the tunnel, came out the other end and then security even HELPED ME repack it as fast as he could….

I thanked everyone….and then

DASHED LIKE CRAZY TO MY CLOSING GATE.

I was in diamante heels and all the Duty Free lot where trying to spritz me with their latest scents as I flew by. Lol

‘I’ve godda go. I’m late for my flight.’

I finally get to Gate….Everyone has boarded. I smash through, out of breath, looking all sorry for myself…

He laughs, checks my boarding pass and passport…

‘Please just tell me i’ve made it..’

‘OOooooooh CLOSE!!! Get on love. You’re fine. You’re off to Spain!’

‘AH! I love you! Thank God for that!’

Last one on. The Jet2 staff couldn’t have been lovelier to me!

Just over 10 minutes later….

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I was on my way to Spain….

Get Me To Spain & Ronaldo Beach Towels

Happy Wednesday, my gorgeous whips of lick festival! That’s it. I’m on holiday mode. I’m feeling the chicas and shaking the maracas and booty grinding to my mirror image, to any ‘holiday memory’ song that will have me.

I’ve worked so so hard this year and in fact all of last year…I’ve worked so hard… I could die. I’ve jiggled and juggled and mummied and selfied. I’ve wiggled and waddled and written every piece of my life out for my own settle of mind and for your own delicious entertainment. There’s been great times, hard times…jollies and stress…Right now, I don’t care….Get me to Spain. I fly tomorrow morning.

I AM NOT IN PANTS. SAFETY LAST!

In fact, if i’m being honest, i’m currently sat up in bed blogging and feeling ridiculously IMPRESSED, with how WELL my tan has developed from last night. Yes, I know I’m Asian and already tanned. Yet, before a bit of โ€˜bikiniโ€™ and because i’m a bit of a Glamour Puss…

*Flashback* Guy: ‘Everyone wants a shot at the glamour puss.’

…I do like a quick fake over, to make my tan McJuicy. I used the Model Co, ‘One Hour Tan Mousse’…

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and I’m always really skeptical about fake tans, because I always figure they’re just gonna wash completely off and not be dark enough for me. But i’ve woken up impressed. So GET ME TO SPAIN NOW.

I couldn’t sleep all night. I don’t know why? I’ve flown a lot, but I don’t like flying and airports stress me out. I was up at 4am stroking ‘Rocco’ my kitten (that sounds rude..it wasn’t that fun….that ‘stroke’ was yesterday ๐Ÿ˜‰ ) and did what I normally do, when I can’t sleep and that is..

GOOGLE EVERYTHING. (Apart from myself. I hate doing that because all the pictures are really old and cringe.)

So, on my Google agenda at 4am, was every celebrity…’on the beach.’ Lol. (Yes, I am that sad. Some people Google ‘World Peace,’ I Google ‘beach bodies‘ and I’m okay with that.)

I went with ‘The Kardashians’ obviously, as they calm my soul in bikinis at 4am, when i’m stressed. I even watched an Oprah interview with them all.

Then I don’t know how I got onto it….(I Googled it ๐Ÿ˜‰ )….But I ended up with ‘Cristiano Ronaldo on the beach’ shots. Lol. AGAIN, what a good find at 4am in the morning….It was SO good that I may have become moderately obsessed with his beach shots. I found myself rating his ‘old school’ look, against his ‘new school’ look.

HAHAHAHA. Why am I a tool?

This is why I need to sleep. This is why I need to grow up. This is why my 7 year old daughter Ruby says,

‘Why does everyone else at school have a normal Mum and I have one that’s like a teenager. You’re like a child.’

The most hilarious part of this Google search was that I ended up at this…

Image result for cristiano ronaldo beach towel ebay

The Cristiano Ronaldo beach towel on ebay. Lol. It could be yours for the bargain price of 30 quid. So I did what any normal girl would do…(no, I didn’t buy it…which reminds me I haven’t packed a towel for my holiday yet,)ย Instead, I *screenshot* it and Snapchatted it to my girl bestie ‘Firmonnell’ who I was messaging last night, with a caption that read…

‘Nothing makes me happier than this towel… Happy Morning!’

The good thing about ‘Firmonnell’ is that she knows I’m an absolute plank, and will just go with it anyway. (Probs because I can get us free cocktails.) And she replied this morning with simple ‘laughy face’ emojis….meaning..

I MAKE PEOPLE HAPPY. (And that like any other normal human being, she can’t be arsed to type before 7am.)

I’m an early bird, so even if I CAN sleep, i’m still up at the crack of dawn. I like to get the most out of my day. Like, I honestly don’t know how people ‘sleep in‘ until noon and slob about eating bacon sarnies, whilst trumping, wondering where life has gone.

Am I in Spain yet? No? Okay cool…

Right, technically, I should take this moment and I do want to take this moment to…

THANK EVERY SINGLE HUMAN AND OR COMPANY…

..That has send me a treat for my holidays. I have been inundated with gifts, products, services and from brands all over the land…and I honestly couldn’t be more grateful. I really, truly appreciate it and I can’t believe how lucky I am. You’ve made me feel really special and in return, I’ll blog, picture and snap the ‘jollies’ out of your products, whilst I’m away. Thank you ever so much. Honestly…I will make sure that they are all over my ‘socials’ throughout my time in Spain.

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Here are a couple of my treats from companies Mirror Image Style (mirrorimagestyle.co.uk) and @Mishmashfashionuk (mishmashfashion.co.uk)ย 

Thank you so much. I’ve tried them all on and they are divine. In total I have 22 bikinis….and you’ll all be rocking this blog and my socials shortly. I’m gonna look ‘Queen’ because of you.

I’ve literally spent the last entire week in bikini fitting, after bikini fitting. Followed by hair piece fitting, after hair piece fitting….It’s been crackers. Yet, I appreciate it all. I feel so lucky. (It makes an old bird smile. ๐Ÿ˜‰ )ย 

I also want to thank ‘Pitstop Rentals, Leeds’ (they’re actually everywhere, all over the North, not just in Leeds) which is a LUXURY/PRESTIGE super car rental and chauffeuring service. I love them so madly and well they will ‘new whipping’ my arse to the airport.

But you’ll all see pictures of everything…as I’ll be placing them everywhere. Make sure you’re following my ‘social’s and stories.’

The diets been going well…I’m still Herbalifing and i’m on Week 4. My body’s changed quite a lot and i’m enjoying feeling a little bit more in shape…and at 37 with two babies…who flipping doesn’t. It’s given me a new lease of life. It made me feel really great! So, i’m certainly doing better for it. I did have someone ‘hate’ on me for doing it, yet mainly because they wanted to indirectly promote their ownย  fitness/nutrition brand all over my wall….

I’ll tell you now. The best way to promote something, is not to ‘hate’ on something or someone else, and place it all over a seemingly popular persons wall to gain audience. As soon as you do. I’m not interested. And I understand that it wasn’t the brand itself, it was someone trying to promote the brand…Yet, they properly went about it, the absolute wrong way. I mean, they even ‘hated’ on the person or people who introduced me to such….and you don’t even know who that was?

I’m a glamour puss. We’re not rude around here. We’re real…in diamonds. Let’s play bouji.

Bottom line, the reason why I decided to initially Herbalife wasย  simply because I saw a body transformation selfie on the Insta profile of a really good friend of mine. He looked amazing. In fact really great. I was personally really impressed….I was SO impressed that it INSPIRED me to want to get back into shape and start feeling extra great.

I spoke to that person…and they helped point me in the right direction…that’s how I ended up here.

Life works via word of mouth, or by the way you choose to cultivate a rapport, with someone. They didn’t ‘hate’ on my wall to promote something because they didn’t have to. They’re classier than that. Instead they showed their own result…which celebrates an achievement..which ended up with ME *tapping* on their door with a ‘help me.’ By all means, mention someone and be lovely about them…Everyone adores that….Yet, just do things correctly….It’s classy and sassy baby boo.

SIMPLES….

It’s funny because I always say, that everything in life, is all about how something makes you FEEL. Nothing more… nothing less.

We react to how the littlest or even biggest things MAKE US FEEL and the only things that can truly make us FEEL, are other things that can FEEL also.

A bit of a preach there for you. ๐Ÿ˜‰ I’m not saying lets all be kind to one another and wear party hats, whilst we sway to boyband love songs. That’s not human nature. We’re all different.

What I AM saying, is let’s be flipping REAL here, instead of dickheads.. Bottom line, don’t hate on another brand on my wall, simply to promote your own. ๐Ÿ˜‰ It is definitely bad manners.

Hahah. I’m over it now. Life was better when I was Googling Ronaldo beach towels at 4am.

I love life. I adore experience. To me, it’s what life is about. And yeah I’ve done some really outrageous things, during my existence so far, that have placed me in really sticky situations. (But I definitely blame the boogie and Hollywood for them. A tremendously surreal place to grow into an adult.)ย  I’ve always been a ballsy one, a life liver, a wild one, who is never afraid to ‘DO ME.’ And yes, i’ve definitely mellowed out at 37, when it comes to the wild antics, yet not when it comes to TRUE SPIRIT. I’ll always do what i love and what I want. And I never feel like I want or need to explain or justify them…as I’m living my own version of life.

When life dishes out crazy bad/exciting times, and you get caught up with the fine art of mistake making…ย (I did this a lot in my 20’s and I am proud to say that I haven’t mistake made in YEARS now..)ย to me it’s all about the LESSONS YOU LEARN. And if a real lesson HAS been learnt, than I am pretty fine with having that experience. I don’t worry about how I got here. I concentrate on where i’m at now….

Everything happens the way it’s supposed to…and we always find out why in the end…

GET ME TO SPAIN!

Here’s a tune to put you in my Holiday mood. (I did all my fittings to this yesterday, as the children made Zebra’s, which Junior still thinks is a Giraffe out of random Wunna Land. Arts & Crafts bits.)

I might not have chance to blog before I land on Spanish soil tomorrow afternoon…So please do follow my ‘Socials’ and Stories.

Love you lots,

Chrissie x


 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Friends, Wine, Gingers & *C* Bombs

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Morning! Gosh! It’s such a busy time. I’m running around like a topless ๐Ÿ˜‰ chicken, trying to get everything dished, dashed and sorted. It’s absolute mayhem. But, what can I say, I’m loving it. (I never take for granted how lucky I am.)

There’s a lot going on right now and yeah, it can feel stressy and yeah, yesterday I felt like I didn’t have the positive support that I needed…But today’s a new day…I’m breathing, I’m smiling and i’m sat blogging this in a giant faux fur, knee high boots, diamante danglers and with heated rollers in my hair!

THAT MY BITCHES…IS GLAMOUR PUSSING. We’ll call it *EXTRA.* ๐Ÿ˜‰

Anyway, that last Sunday, I ended up meeting ‘Poggy’ at The Carleton for a couple drinks…without my bank card. (I have it now. Life is bliss.) The guy she wanted to maybe go on a date with was busy, yet instead, a different guy had waited all night until his guy friends had each left, then approached her with a…

‘I was waiting for them to leave, so I could get to chat to you….’

They ended up on a ‘date.’ So, even though it’s ‘early days,’ I guess everything happens for a reason. You get what you’re meant to get…and life sort of times things correctly for you. You’ll be surprised at how many things do actually fall into place. It’s magical and like I always say, it’s a ‘magic’ we can’t control.

I never use timing as an excuse. You meet people because you’re meant to meet them..even if right away that second, you have no clue why? It’s always for a reason, a season or a lifetime. You’re paths will keep crossing, until all life elements are correctly in place, and you’ve figured out your connection.

Barmaid to Poggy: ‘He’s the kinda man who will kiss you when you need to be kissed and slap you when you need to be slapped.’

That Sunday night ended up being wilder than I thought? So much fun. Good friends, new memories and all around a table…as day turned to night.

There was laughter, wine and sarcasm as it’s finest…and as always, we definitely got carried away. You can’t get us started with banter, in the name of wit and ‘Being Yorkshire’ we go for it.

I went to school with ‘Poggy’ and she’s been a good friend of mine for years. We were actually laughing over the fact that our ‘careers teacher,’ stated that she would become a marine and that I would become a florist, after we answered a couple of personality questions. Lol.

Poggy: ‘How the F*** did they come up with that!!’

Me: ‘I must have just said I like flowers and pretty things and you must have said that you…’

Pet Laura: ‘Like to kill things…Lol. It’s like The Hunter & The Vajazzle.’

(‘Pet Laura’ is a Dog Groomer. She found herself at our table, wishing she was in Africa, bottle feeding tigers, or something? Then she had gin.)ย 

One gin down and she was naming our vagina’s after ‘Harry Potter’ spells. I distinctly remember looking up and for some reason ‘Poggy’ and ‘Pet Laura’ were doing these weird hand actions and refering to their ‘lady parts’ as..

HUNTER.

(Mine’s not a ‘Hunter,’ mines just tired. Hi, True love! Where are you? Please find me.)

Poggy: ‘I think that because you have such a busy life and a busy life online, you would always need a man who is chilled. Someone who gets on with it and takes that stress away…’

Me: ‘Yeah, I don’t like a stressy man. I don’t like them to come with a bundle of emotional issues… I don’t like things to be complicated. I don’t have time to unfold, mend or cry into wine anymore.’

Y’know, everyone always thinks i’m picky when it comes to love and I’m not picky as in ‘fussy,’ i’m just happy and when you’re happy….you sometimes wonder whether you need to invite another human in? But then I think, I’m gonna need someone to carry heavy bags and do the bins, aren’t I? ๐Ÿ˜‰

So, yeah, I should probably team up with a fella and do ‘lifetime’ sometime shortly.

I just don’t want to invest in a ‘fling’ at 37. I can’t be arsed. I’m not excited by them. I’m too old for that I’ve ‘flung’ all the way through my 20’s, hoping that it would always be forever. Each time I got it wrong. Even after ‘I doing it’ three whole times!

What I’ve learnt, is that I don’t need to worry about it. YOU don’t need to worry about it either. Girls always worry about it. I never do.ย  I have absolute faith, that no matter what, the man who truly loves me, because he can’t help it, (banter, winks, diva strops and all)….will come get me. (I shouldn’t have used the word ‘get’ it makes it sound like he’s gonna kidnap me and throw me in the back of a van.)

But you get what I mean….innit! ๐Ÿ™‚

All I have to do, is ‘sit pretty,’ get on with life…and wait. Cupid an I are mates now. He doesn’t mess with me. I don’t mess with him. It’s simples. Plus, Girls shouldn’t chase boys. We shouldn’t have to. I enjoy the traditional art of the ‘dude coming forward.’

Annnnnyway… (I totally got distracted…)

That Sunday…day turned to night and the bright blue skies, were slowly blanketed with a navy sheet, that almost swirled in a grey mist, littered with stars. (I don’t actually know if there were stars out?? Lol. I’ve made that bit up.)

‘Pet Laura’ had left and just as she did, the outside door swung open and out popped ‘Parsons.’ (She’s a friend of a friend, who is ace, because whenever she’s drunk, she gets really gobby and starts doing hand stands and rollie pollies everywhere.)

The tempo changed to that good old, loud, cracking, fast Northern, naughty, foul mouthed, BANTER.

IT WAS GREAT! (I cannot even repeat what was said.)

‘Parsons’ enjoys to use the *C* bomb, which I always find hilarious. She’s such a free spirit. Such a wild, loud, laugh! In fact, she loves the *C* bomb so much, that she even delivers it in melody.

Everything at this point turned into a blurry, fun, wine drenched haze. And a red ‘outside heater’ glow, surrounded us. It nurtured us. It kept us safe. It obided to he rules of The Wine Gods.

Now, ‘Poggy’ and ‘Parsons’ got on really well…They have swimming in common. They want to swim everywhere together. They want to travel the world and swim through valleys.

It was like one of those moments when you first meet someone in a bar, but you’re both pissed, think you’re best friends and plan holidays together! ๐Ÿ™‚

Me: ‘You’re definitely not going to swim together.’

Parsons: ‘Everyone thinks i’m fat. But i’m actually a really good swimmer.’

(Then she did ‘swimming arm’ demonstrations at me.)

Me: ‘I only do breast stroke with my face above the water, so it doesn’t ruin my face.’

Anyway, they had some unique ‘hoe’mance’ going on. They loved each other and mocked ‘Parsons’ ginger husband, who was definitely stood, pressing the ‘heater on’ button every 10 seconds.

Poggy: ‘He’s like The King of The Gingers.’

Me: ‘But he’s not even ginger? You can’t be The Ginger King…when you’ve got brown hair? Surely that’s not a title you can take?’

Parsons: ‘He IS ginger. I’ve got a ginger kid and i’m a brunette. I love you *Poggy,* you’re like a blond version of me… in a polo neck.’

(Now, i’ve just looked at my blog notes from that evening and I’ve typed ‘Fast pass to brown hair,’ after that piece of ‘polo neck’ statement. However, I have no clue, what that means now? Lol. All I remember was looking up and seeing the girls bickering over who had said the ‘funniest’ thing..)

‘Why have you put that down. I said something WAAAY MORE FUNNIER THAN HER and that SHOULD MAKE THE BLOG.’

All got really drunk. All had a lot of fun. I got stopped a couple times, that evening by the occasional Geordie and people who love my ‘Blog/Influencey’ stuffs.

I absolutely bantered with you all. But I was far too drunk to dish out advice, which is what everyone was asking me for. ๐Ÿ™‚

I’ve received your DM’s though…So, i’ll try and swizzle in some time to meet and inspire. (I appreciate the love.)

Message me again, in case I forgot. There’s not such thing and reminding me TOO MUCH. I love ‘people reminders’ as I often get lost in work load and jiggery pokery.

Right, I’m off. I’ve got the babies and a lot to try and organize. Things have been so jam packed, that it’s been hectic. I fly to Spain in 7 days. Thursday morning.

I’m kinda really looking forward to getting away for a few days by myself, just to relax and finally get that ‘chill’ time in,ย  that I never seem to prioritize.

It’s been a busy first part of the year…and sometimes I feel like i’m running as fast as I can, but on the spot. Lol.

What I need right now, is to relax…a wine….and a result.

(Things are never that easy though, are they?)

Kisses,

Chrissie,

 

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