I had such a stressy night. All was well. All was wonderful. The Babies and I were a delight. All was sound, as we gathered in our *comfies* and watched telly, by the Christmas tree, with snacks.
Junior got the ‘Special Mention’ at school, so was filled with happiness. Ruby was overjoyed that it was finally the weekend, so she could relax. They had survived their consecutive day, ‘School Accident Form’ doo/dah and life was simply BLISS. (Junior was cute because when passing, he heard teachers talking about Ruby in the office. She had just had a fall. He stopped and asked if he could go see her in her classroom. Once granted, he went in and hugged her, to make sure she was okay. Aww! Lol)
Bliss! Delight! Let’s Call Disney & Tell Them To Make A Movie!
…my Mum pops around, we have a massive fight, and everything turns to shit. We’re both really strong headed, so it’s annoying, when we bicker. The thing about my Mum is that, she’s about to go on Holiday for 2 weeks. Even though she loves a holiday, (don’t we all,) every single INCH of HER worries about the babies and I, during her absence. She a proper family woman. A great mum. But she’s nuts.
After the sharp bicker, that played almost like a swift, yet verbal knife throw, I got so bored of sitting there awkwardly, (y’know when you just sit there, being silent and pulling faces, so everyone in the room KNOWS your mad, Lol) that I did the only thing I knew how to do, as a daughter.
That was stand up, storm out of the room, perform a giant, angry hair toss, fling my glitter shoes at a wall and strut upstairs, stomping on every step. Haha. I then wet wiped all my face OFF, took off all my clothes OFF and with a *HUFF* went OFF to bed!!
The art of ‘SULKING’ is exhausting. I hate it. I tossed and turned all night.
I’m such a Sasserilla, when I think i’m right, that my opponent has NO CHANCE.
Then I had this dream that I was high in the sky, amongst the clouds , but falling out of a plane, tied to Talique from ‘I’m a Celebrity.’ I’m not sure if it was a ‘losing control’ kinda dream or a sexy one? I can’t quite decide? Haha. But yes, I’ve woken up fine, but stressed…even though everything’s kinda gone back to normal. It’s made me feel unbalanced.
We do this, The Wunna’s….We have these ‘Blow Outs’ and then everything goes back to normal, straight away…and mainly because if not, I WILL SULK FOREVER. 😉 I’m a proper grudge holder, until I hear a sincere apology.
Honestly, I’m awful for a ‘sulk sesh.’ I’m not really good at it, but I FULLY COMMIT to it. I’m loyal and brimming with pride. I’m also vain, so I like to look good when I sulk. Haha. It’s great when you’re sulking, after a fight with a guy who’s attracted to you, because their willies kick into action and you always win the war.
I think there’s a problem with me because there’s no grey area. There’s no fuzzy, static channel. It’s all swift flying emotion, or nothing at all. That’s with BOTH happiness & despair. I’d sort it, if I could be bothered. But there’s cocktails to sip and I kinda like who I am.
(I currently have ‘Thanku, Next’ playing in the background. How is Ariana Grande’s voice so beautiful? She literally sounds like a dream. She can take any song and swirl it with a sound of smooth, angelic empowerment. I wish I could sing. I wish I could ice skate.)
So, I got this strange Snapchat message, yesterday evening. No. It wasn’t strange. It was actually lovely. Really lovely. The kind of message that I adore.
‘You’re so beautiful. X’
I’m classing it as ‘strange’ simply because I didn’t expect it to pop up, (I had to double take) and then I couldn’t decide if it was friendly, suggestive, by accident, all of the above, or even correct of him? I already know the guy closely. I just didn’t expect it, because he’s not in the correct ‘relationship status’ box.
That’s not cool.
However, I understand what he’ll be going through right now, because i’m going through the exact same thing…So he could’ve just had a couple of gins and let a mixture of his memories, his heart and his ‘really big’ willy take the lead.
I saved the conversation on purpose to terrify him…Boys sometimes need to feel terrified. They can’t have their cake and eat it. Even if they think they can…
I’m fine with the message though. I’ve done the ‘ginned up’ message numerous times, through life. So, I get it. My messages are always tragic though, because I don’t have a willy. (I might grow one, for kicks though.)
I wish I could just *blink* and be having fun in a Leeds cocktail bar right now.
Gosh! Morning, my lil’ Twinkles! My delicious tickles of fancy. I have been SO UTTERLY *RUSHED* off my little kitten feet. It’s been mad. I’ve been busy. Yet in a way, I’m delighted, because I really do hope to one day ‘blink’ and see that ALL of my dreams have come true…and if that takes‘busy,’ if that takes ‘hard work,‘ than to me, I’m there. I’d rather do it, than ponder it..
TBone: ‘ It’s not what someone says, it’s always what they do…’
Especially when i’m in a productive frame of mind. Y’know, before cocktails get the better of me. Haha.
I reckon, if you can still commit to productivity, in a really great heels, you’ll smash life!
(Oh! Wait! I thought I said that I was always gonna wear ‘flats’ now, after running for my life and falling over 40 times at Scare Kingdom?)
Nevermind. Ghosts & Kidnappers would just set me free anyway, because I’d definitely do their head in. My choice of footwear wouldn’t be an issue.
Kidnapper: ‘God! Let her OUT. Switch her for a better victim. Ooh. Shes wearing glitter heeled pumps from the ****** collection.’
I was talking to ‘Celeb Ghost Hunt’ Ash, the other day…He wants me to go on an investigation with him. I must be a sucker for terror. I hate being frightened. Haha.
Anyway, back to non frightening stuff…
I’ve travelled all over. I’ve been on shoots, auditions, i’ve been good, i’ve been bad, I’ve been influencing a jolly load, ready for the festive season. (Which is a REALLY BUSY time for everyone.) I’m also doing the single mum thing also, aren’t I? (I adore every INCH of the bambinos. Junior’s a delight. Ruby’s got her first set of glasses.) I wouldn’t have it any other way. They’re my world. I’m raising a Glamour puss and a Hero. Last night they both *shocked* themselves up, ran out of their rooms and got into my bed, because we all got lonely and afraid of the dark. Lol
Nobody likes to sleep alone. The only time i’m okay with it, is when i’m drunk and just need to pass out…still with my face on. (Which I don’t really recommend as a graceful little pastime. It only makes you feel worse in the morning,)
On the whole, I’m really happy, right now and when i’m this busy and this happy, it seems that I forget about my ever so rubbish love life.
I’m still 37. I’m still single. It ain’t that bad.
I’m happy a singleton. But after everything i’ve been through. The ups, the downs & the ‘mess me arounds’, i’m still not cautious. (I still wear my heart on my sleeve.) I don’t know whether that’s a good thing or a bad thing? I very much trust people with my heart. EVEN NOW I still trust that they’re going to take care of it…..because firstly I see the beauty in everyone and secondly…because i’m probably foolish. Haha.
I never know if they see me as their ‘bitch,’ their ‘bed notch,‘ or their ‘baby for life? Haha..Sounds like a Fairytale. If I can’t decide, i’ll just sit back and leave it to them, to come forward and show me what category, I fall into.
If they don’t come forward then they’re weren’t for me. (I’ll just see it all as, ‘they weren’t that interested.’) I like a forward man. A brave one.
You know why? Probably because i’m not used to guys being romantically forward me with…It’s almost like they’re terrified to be? And I have no clue why? Whatsoever? I don’t get it? You’ll see a lot of guys openly comment on my pics etc, via my ‘socials.’ Yet, the majority of them don’t..and instead shoot in a sneaky DM. (That sounds naughty! Haha.)
I literally get one almost every 2 minutes.
However, in real life….If a guy actually fancies me…they’re usually forward to begin with and then stop being so forward…..It’s like they want ME to chase them?
When you’re a 30 something woman, nothing is worse than having to chase a guy for attention. I’ve done it lots, much to my own embarrassment. But I don’t do it, now. EVER. Who has the time or that? If someone wants to go on a date..They should just tell me. If they want to be with me…They shouldn’t be scared to say it.
Plus, i’m quite traditional when it comes to the chase..the ‘wooing.’ I like a boy to ‘hunt & gather,‘ as I ‘fan‘ myself prettily.
Guy friend: ‘You only like them to *hunt and chase* if you fancy them though. If you don’t, you always *shut* them down and we hate that. You make the approach extremely intimidating…’
I’ve decided to describe my love life like this….
It’s kinda like cleaning a window, with a raggy cloth. Some day, I’ll be able to see through the glass. 😉
I bumped into my friend Shaun yesterday. He’s a bodyguard..
Shaun: ‘It’s not like the flipping movie Chrissie!!’
He’d just got back from London. I’d just got off a busy weekend. Plus, I’m actually looking for family security and safety, right now. A wee bit of close protection. Not all the time. Just when necessary. Sometimes, when we’re out as a family or i’m influencing something, people will stop to chatter or selfie with me. And I love that. Yet, they’ll just be ME & the babies. I need to make sure they’re always watched. I’m paranoid after some creepy guy, who only knew me from instagram, followed us around Doncaster & wouldn’t leave us alone & after a guy tried to glass another guy in a Manchester bar, because he was trying to hit on me?
I didn’t know either guy…I knew they were both trying to hit on me?
All I heard was the female manager shouting..
‘Get her out the way…’
Then guys and girls starting grabbing glass bottles and smashing them up against the bar, to use in a fight!
IT WASN’T EVEN A ROUGH PLACE.
I wouldn’t have gone there if it was.
The police even got called and the bar had to be shut down for the evening, It got that crazy.
I don’t get it?
So, it was good to briefly catch up, with Shaun.
Shaun: ‘You’re starting early…’
Me: ‘Haha. I know. I don’t even care.’
(I was sat in a quiet corner at The Mallard, in Doncaster.)
Me: ‘You’ve got luggage on wheels. I hate it when people have luggage on wheels. Haha.’
Shaun: ‘I feel like a Trolley Dolly, but i’m working it.’
So we discussed security, talked life, work and caught up…The we dashed off. (I didn’t end up posting my blog. When people I know come up to me and start chatting, that’s it, you can’t shut me up. I’ll just spend time with them instead. But I like that about me. I put LIVING life, BEFORE typing it out.)
I guess, I need to find balance. 😉
Then Sam ‘The Reecey Reece’ fest messaged me, to see when we could schedule in ‘catch up’ time. We’re like ‘ships passing in the night.’
‘Are you free on…?’
Then I just got on with life.
I’ve had so much fun over the weekend. I’ve worked. I’ve loved. I’ve lived. I’ve had the best time. I celebrated my Dad’s birthday on Saturday. I did Xscape, Castelford with the kids. We smashed ‘Nandos.’ I did Meadowhall. I wiggled at Wagamamas.
Just so much!
I’m so grateful for how well, everyone treated me, over that time!
It was actually Pete (Ruby’s Dad’s Birthday) on Sunday. But Ruby didn’t want to hang out with him, because she wanted to do Influencing with me at Meadowhall. Being Pete. he showed up at Meadowhall, with is bestie Jay, in dying hope that he’d get to spend some time with Ruby..in her new specs.
It worked…and we all ended up doing dinner together at Wagamamas, with my Mum & brother.
But I kinda like that, we co parent well. We haven’t been together for years. In fact 7 years…Yet, it’s great that we can all ‘kick it.’ Y’know, just chill and have a duck pancake together. Lol.
When co parenting works.
Anyway, about my love life…
The weird thing is, with me being busy and ‘forgetting’ about love…It seems, that gents are peeking back into Wunna Land and tapping on my glitter door, again.
I’m calling this time..
Operation ‘Blasts From The Pasts.’
A couple of guys that USED to fancy me,…seemed to have returned to my DM’s with a ‘Hey. How are you?’ One guy had actually started dating a girl, but she went through his phone and *blocked* me…Haha. He didn’t even realise, until one of his other friends pointed it out.
Safe to say…They’re no longer together. (But there you have it! You shouldn’t have chosen ‘The Crazy’ over me. Hhahaha.)
It’s all good fun. A laugh. We’re all making memories.
If i could tell you anything.
I’ll tell you that I was a really lucky girl. I’ll tell you to always chase your dreams and when you feel inspired, to act upon it. A dream doesn’t just have to be a ‘make believe‘ moment. You can at least TRY and make your reality. People do it every day. Why not you? I’m living proof.
Always be kind. Always do the things that make you happy. Don’t sacrifice your true happiness, to ‘run through the motions.’ Wake up. Feel the breeze, Go with it. Nothing is better than living you best life.
Don’t listen to anyone, or anything but your gut instinct. It will show you the right way. It will also tell you when you’re ready.
Always believe in love…
It is the ONLY thing, that is going to power you through the bad times and make the good times simply MAGICAL.
I had such a ‘drama’ Monday, after the most blissful & peaceful weekend of ‘family.’ I’ve got so much going on, that i’m filling myself with a delicious flourish of stress. It’s kinda topped up with that beautiful thing we call ‘anxiety,’ simply because i’m terrified. I don’t even know what’s wrong with me? So, i’m gonna go with hormones?
I’m back on the telly shortly…That’s worrying me. I’ve got a lot to organise with the kids…That’s worrying me. I have shoots galore and auditions coming out my ‘hooty..’ That’s worrying me. My love life is *whizzing* around me, almost madly…I don’t even know what’s going on? Yes. I get a lot of attention. Yes, I’m single.
However, I’m noticing that, if I ever begin to feel for anyone, I get stressed out, because giant *CAUTION* signs go up everywhere. I’ve always had a shit love life. So, it’s scary. Plus, I’m absolutely emotional, so to me, it only means ‘danger.‘ I do not ever want to get my heartbroken again….EVER. I tread carefully. (Well…fuck that. I ‘stiletto.’)
I have travels and schedules and places to influence…Everything’s a juggle…Sometimes, I panic and I can’t even breathe. (Cue: Drama 😉 )
But the weird thing is, i’m HAPPY. I’m really happy and maybe being so happy, or so lucky, makes me worry because LET ME TELL YOU, my life hasn’t been so easy….Haha. It’s laughable.
Basically, I’m scared of everything right now, because i’m having to pinch myself…and I need to ‘Man up,’ count my blessings and get on with it, with panache.
At the weekend, I did Meadowhall with The Wunna’s and Ruby. (Junior was at his Dads.) We were pretty much treated like Meadowhall shopping royalty (and I thank you for that, because I don’t even know why?) It did feel wonderful though.
We shopped and stopped at Wagamama’s. Then after cocktail refuels, toy stores, makeup counters, new hair (we all need those extra few inches,) and my brand new chakra beads…Life felt almost perfect.
Ruby: ‘Mum. You’re chakra beads are not working. You’re CRAZY. You’re still nuts. They don’t work.’
(She is right, though. Even though I told her to ‘shush.‘ At this rate, i’m gonna need to see Buddha and get blessed by monks, or something! Maybe i’m just not meant for ‘Total Enlightenment.’ Maybe, i’m meant to live this ridiculous life of pathetic glory, for your entertainment… Haha.)
I’m starting to believe that…
‘Hey Destiny…You’ve fucked me over. You’re off the Christmas card list! You’re chilling on the naughty list, with Cupid and a few Pretty Boy exes from 2004.’
This is how I feel right now…
Like I’ve drank 42 energy drinks, had a bottle of rum, taken all my clothes off, and then thrown MYSELF to the lions.
Then…because i’m not at all mental….
…I lost the car…I always lose the car…Oh! Wait!! I don’t mean?Ugh. I’m rambling. I didn’t REALLY lose the car! I kinda ‘misplaced’ it? Y’know, when you can’t quite remember where you left it? 🙂 My Mum, drove home, because obviously, I guzzled Aperol Spritzies…after The Disney Store.
Fair enough, there was lots of wine, brunches and fun over the weekend. I checked in with my friends…briefly. Got on top of work. Then just relaxed with the kids. However….one of my favourite moments of the weekend, was the ‘school mum..’ catch up…
(There was a kids birthday party over the weekend…)
Miss.Murphy: ‘What are you wearing!?! Lol. Who wears glitter shoes to a kids party..?? Haha.’
Me: ‘Shut up. Lol. These are my driving shoes.’
Sam: ‘Does Ruby want Pizza?’
Me: ‘It’s like the Real Housewives of Yorkshire…’
Mum: ‘I got asked to be on Real Housewives of Marbella, a while ago, but I said no…I’m too boring, for it!’
Me: ‘You said NO! As if you said NO!! I can’t believe you said no. I would’ve moved to Marbella, to have done it. Haha.’
( I live for that show…It calms me, when I’m stressed. Yet, so does the occasional Jeremy Kyle episode…? So, yeah…I’m mental. Ignore me.)
Other Mum: ‘Oh yeah. I’m gonna be flying away with him.’
Miss. Murphy: ‘You’re actually going now! What about…?’
Other Mum: ‘Oh…he doesn’t know..’
Miss.Murphy: ‘You said he was fat and bald…But he’s not at all?’
Me: ‘How have I sat here for an hour and not known it’s your birthday today!!’
Miss. Murphy: ‘So, are you seeing your date again?’
I never thought i’d be a traditional ‘school mum.’ Yet, there’s just something about this group of Mamas, that is filled with the ‘sexy.’ They’re actually not traditional, school mums, in rain macs. They’re alive. They’re fun. They have designer shoes that read ‘LOVE.’ Louis Vuitton handbags and possible stables…’
They’re, what I call ‘Prosecco Mums,’ and I love them, madly. I’m like the tragic misfit of the bunch. The single, no husband, disorganized one, with a suggestive Insta profile…
We’re all really different from one another. Yet, w’re all great women. Confident women. Great mothers and well, I just really enjoy they’re company.
Then all our kids ruined everything and shoved tall plastic, slush palm trees, in our faces…
At that point, the gossip got censored…
My inbox is * pinging,* almost every minute, with people asking me about my love life and my last date etc…
All I can tell you is that, the guy that I did the Manchester Airport date with, was wonderful. He says he wants to see me again, and I definitely will. I found him really sexy and confident. He’s smart and thoughtful. I liked him. I’find him interesting…I want to know lots about him…I’ll definitely be meeting him again. (I’m only one ‘meeting’ in. So it’s all ‘early doors.’)
I’m just treading carefully…Like I said, I’m not bothered about getting my heart broken, right now, when I have so much going on…
I eventually want to fall in love. I’m a true romantic. I want to be swept off my feet. Adored. Respected. And y’know, in that one meet up, my date was that! He was a REAL MAN, which made me notice that I’d not only been looking in the wrong place for love, but i’d wasted a lot of my time, on ‘little boys.’ At 37 years old, I don’t need to be doing that!
When it comes to love…
…this time..because obviously i’ve been married three times and had numerous flings and relationships..I want to PROPERLY fall in love. I want it to be stable and forever…with no stress. No drama.
And I do want to just say, that even though on paper, i’ve dated, romanced, flinged, loved, married, divorced, sexed..and well…just all sorts, with men, all over the world.
DO KNOW THAT….
… I never did all that because I was a floozy. That’s one of the biggest misconceptions about me. I’m a love bunny. There were options. I was young. A glamour model. Off the telly…Growing up in Hollywood…All sorts.
Yet, I never was and still not a man eater. I’m non judgemental. I’m modern. Yet when it comes to love, I’m quite ‘fairytale.’ I’m quite traditional…I’m a hopeless romantic, with a capital ‘H.’
So, every single time, I went into these encounters, with men, boys, gents, or misfits..
I always hoped (like any girl or woman,) that they would love me forever.
It just didn’t and still hasn’t quite worked out that way….
It’s actually only when I suddenly realise, that they guy i’ve been chatting to, or dating, only see’s me as a ‘bed notch’ or someone they daren’t date… It was only THEN…at that point, when I HAVE to file the encounter under ‘casual,‘ and ‘take it on the chin,’ without being embarrassed.
So i’m accidentally, a sassy, sexy, modern day woman.
The ‘Brand’ goes alongside that….and that’s fine with me, as it makes me very ‘now.’ It gives me the necessary ‘street cred.’ I’m swag. I’m cool…I’m…Blah, blah….
You get it…
Y’see, when it comes to WORK, I am that. I’m fire. I’m determined. I’m ambitious. I’m a glamourous, kitty DIVA, sprayed over, in solid steel, showers of glitter. Champagne pops around me and naughty winks, fill my walk way…
When it comes to love…I’m the opposite.
I’m not someone who really wants random casual sex. I love sex. But i don’t play a numbers game. I want to feeel a connection.
Plus, If i’m honest, I can have sex with anyone… I have an inbox full of offers…almost every few minutes.
That doesn’t make me feel mighty. It’s flattering. I appreciate the ‘adoration..’ Of course I do….
If anything it stresses me out, because I think, ‘how the hell can I have so much attention and not find Mr.Right. That ONE MAN, who will truly love and treasure me forever?’
I’m ready to fall in love…
I’m just scared to….
It makes me anxious…
Away from all that…Sunday morning was great because before Meadowhall, I got to chatter to Lil’ Sam Reece. I shouldn’t call him ‘Lil’ as he’s pretty grown. He’s a good guy. I’ve referred to him as ‘Tats’ on this blog before.
I like waking up on a Sunday morning to a Reecy phone ‘ping.’ We’ll just have brief morning banter. ..then get on with life. We chatter in ‘spits & spots’ a lot. We both always have really shit love lives…We’re both ‘Yorkshire.’ We actually get on well. It’s easy. We wired the same way. We have the same banter.. This Sunday we talked ‘car bonnets/hotels and flat caps.’
I was actually gonna meet him for drinks..But I ended up doing Meadowhall instead and he ended up doing boy drinks…
But he’s a good guy. So I have a lot of respect for our Sam. He’s a good buddy…I’d see Sam as the kinda guy, i’d go for a drink with and kiss in the elevator when no one was looking. Haha!
(That hasn’t happened, by the way, before you all get excited. But i’d definitely kiss him in an elevator…It’d be a waste of ‘sexy’ people, if not. I don’t like to waste sexy people. You only live once.)
Did my hair, did my face, did my lips, did my pout, slipped into heels and got myself to the train station, which would delicately deliver me to Manchester airport, in one glamourous piece, ready for my ‘date,’ my ‘meet up.’
Before, we start, I’ll let you know I had the most amazing time. It was almost wonderous. I wrongly thought that my date was in Liverpool, but it was actually in Manchester. Good job, he reminded me, before I arrived in the wrong city. Lol. He actually FLEW IN for work and then the date… (Bouji, innit. 😉 I like that about him.)
But why am I so shocking!!!! I couldn’t even get the city right?
Yet, before I even got there, I shat myself with nerves, in my little Missy Empire pink dress. (Thank you for the dress. It was devilish. The little pink dress, is the NEW little black dress.) I stopped off, got two wines at The Mallard, in Doncaster, as @kingkenny1985 (who works there, and loves a Wunna Land insta story) had to *pause* and do a ‘double take..’ with a…
‘I just had to double check to see if it was you…You WILL get yourself into these situations…Lol’
I got to Platform 3B, which takes me straight to Manchester airport, kinda in a jiffy and that was after ‘The Draughtsman Ale House’ handed me a ‘half’ a tipple, to calm my nerves, because they were so excited about my little adventure! (Thank you for that! 🙂 )
(It fell out of my hand on the train, whilst I was messaging Miss.Muprhy and ‘drop poured’ into my OPEN, overnight bag. 😉 )
Everything just stank of ale! 🙂 All you could hear was this random Oriental, faux furred, big haired… idiot, SWEARING under her breath, like an angry, porny looking…ninja.
‘I can’t help it, i’m just drawn this way….’
My date was excited, messaged me the whole way through, to keep me in check, with his whereabouts. He did admit he was a little nervous.
Date: ‘Wow! I’m almost nervous to meet you…Lol.’
(I was ‘dropping fucking drinks’ nervous. But it always scares me when they’re nervous, because I don’t want them to think i’m some kind of goddess, because they’ll only be disappointed when they meet me, i’m sure.)
Chick friend: ‘Not so adventurous and brave now, are you Wuns! Haha.’
Me: ‘Fuck off. I’m STILL l doing it. I’m STILL headed there. I never said I don’t actually feel the fear! Haha.’
He’d organised everything, so perfectly to a ‘T.’ Rooms were booked, everything has been scheduled, sorted and planned out. Almost wonderfully. All he wished for ME to do, was show up,’relax and enjoy.’
It’s almost like I had forgotten, that men like him…actually still existed.
He’s a miracle. You wouldn’t even believe it. Before I even went on the date….and remember I had never ever met him in person….He had already managed to make me feel like a Princess…That’s the wrong word.
He made me feel appreciated, respected, beautiful and of absolute worth.
All that ever matters to me, is how someone makes me feel… He didn’t even do it, with intent to manipulate or be showy….He did it, because he’s just built that way, he’s kind. He’s so much fun, but a proper old school gentleman.
I LOVED IT. It makes a guy so so sexy!
I arrived at the airport. I was driven to the hotel…It was raining so heavily outside, which I kinda love, when I know i’m INSIDE. There’s an evening comfort to it.
He arrived much earlier and had to dash off to work. I had school runs etc, so arrived in the evening…I had an envelope with my name upon it, with my room key ready and waiting for me…and with a smile, a wink and shake off of the rain, I was headed up the elevator, into my room…as the rain poured down, over Manchester Airport.
I got settled, took selfies, did lunges (lol) and went down to the bar for a white wine spritzer. The staff couldn’t have been more delightful. I was at The Clayton Hotel. right by the airport. I tottered in with my wink and pink dress…and Life was pretty much sorted from there.
He had just got done at the match….and was en route to meeting me.
The whole way through, he made sure I was utterly comfortable. He’s really organised, so he was telling me the plan, every hour. Lol.
Date: ‘Just order anything you need to eat or drink on the room, when you arrive. Don’t worry. Honestly, just enjoy…I’ll see you soon…’
I got my own drinks at the bar..whilst I waited. I actually met loads of fun people, who were all off on sunny adventures. The gents loved me in that bar, but the chicks didn’t…and I hate that, because I’m lovely. Lol.
(Girls shouldn’t SCOWL at girls, they do not know. When you do, you lose your swag, your beauty & your level of confidence becomes very visible. Even if you feel it…don’t do it. I’m not there to steal your man, i’m on a flipping DATE!)
But what can I say…My lil’ pink dress was ‘killer.’
Long story short…
He arrived…I was upstairs in the room…and when the door opened and I saw him…I filled with terror, smiled, (because you just godda charm that shit out) and then just told him that I was nervous.
He smiled…looked at me. He actually *paused* and looked me in the eye. I didn’t know whether to be happy for terrified. Did he think I was hot? Or did he think I was not? Yet, then when I snapped out of my few seconds of utter, charming *panic,* I then looked at HIM…and a calm, warmness sort from him…
Date: ‘Wow, you look great. You’re dressed like that and i’m dressed like this..Lol. I’ve ordered food to the room…I’ve had such a stressful day, i need a drink. Lol. I’ve also ordered you another wine…’
(He already knew what i’d been drinking at the bar. I like that. It impresses me.)
Then just like that, we sat down, we relaxed and we just started talking. He sat on the sofa and I sat a little away from him…But I noticed that I’m much more guarded now. I had my arms folded, to accessorize my smile. When I was on my first date with ‘The Swirl’ ages ago…I wasn’t like that, I was all cuddly and kissy…and…banter.
I was guarded that night. Open, friendly…yet nervous about potentially getting my little kitten heart broken…in the future. Yet, that’s not the way to go…You don’t know what’s gonna happen in the future…So, i relaxed, enjoyed by time, the moment and him.
He was alive He’s smart. He’s fun. He’s non judgemental. He knows a lot about people and life. He’s excited by me. He’s a family man. Someone who knows what truly matters to him, in life…
HE DIDN’T EVEN FLINCH, WHEN I TOLD HIM HOW MANY TIMES, I’D BEEN MARRIED ETC… He’s not terrified of me….He’s impressed by me?
He laughed and said…
‘I love that about you…At least I know you’re not scared of commitment, If i ever need to ask….Lol’
Then he said,
‘Datings always hard isn’t it…because you can meet a really pretty girl and she has an awful personality, or has no grasp on real life…You’re not like that, at all. I saw that you were a Mum and I loved that about you… I knew that you had real responsibilities and experienced real love…real life…’
OH MY GOD! DREAM!
(He’s also a Father… and I love a family man, don’t I! I also love that he’s bouji, but real. He’s not caught up with bullshit. He’s solid, stable, loving, sexy and a HAPPY singleton. He’s open to love….But would rather be on his own, than be with someone who wasn’t right! Just like ME!!!)
But the more we spoke, the more I relaxed I became. He was so interesting…so calm….
Date: ‘How old are you? God! You don’t look it at all…’
Me: ‘Everyone says that, but I don’t get it. It’s cos you didn’t know me when I was 20.’
Then we started eating and sipping our drinks…We started talking about footballers and glamour models and how they kinda have the same sort of job/lifestyle, yet one has the boy version and the other had the girl version…. of the shindig.
Date: ‘I guess, that’s why they always date?’
Me: ‘I just think sporty boys are filled with more testosterone, really. Lol’
Date: ‘Hahah. No, but when it comes to our lifestyle etc….Us guys, want to date an exciting girl. A *dangerous* girl. A beautiful girl…A.. ….’
Me: ‘Someone that gets ya juices flowing… I get it… Someone who isn’t Vanilla..’
Date: ‘Yeah. You’re that. You’re dangerous...(he had a smirk on his face, when he said it.) But you’re not just looks, like most…So, i’m almost sat here, hoping you want to see me again…I need to get shower… Hang on…’
Me: Why have you turned the lights off…?’
Date: ‘So I don’t scare you… Lol’
(Only a true vixen isn’t scared in the dark Haha. It’s the light that makes her feel unnerved.)
The rest of the evening was divine. We relaxed. We shared stories. I needed to relax a lot more than he did, if I’m honest. He was confident, caring, he knew life. He’s one of those ‘good at everything,’ guys… But so so humble.
Me: ‘There isn’t anything you can’t do? What are you rubbish at?’
Date: ‘I can’t dance well. I’m an athlete, so I can move…But I just don’t find it easy to dance. Hahaha. ‘
Then because he felt I was tense, he walked his fingers up my back and pushed on parts that he felt were tense.
It was literally the most gentle thing, and it felt SO good.
He was GROWN. He was full MAN. Like, he raised the bar, on what being a true man is! He’s an actual ‘great at everything,’ guy, with a successful career, who’s a wonderful father/family guy. Someone who’s loving, sexy… and truly truly knows how to take care of a woman…on every level.
He walked his fingers up to the top of my back, just under my neck and pushed his fingers down to release tension….I looked at him, through a mirror…and we smiled…
That was the part where I trusted him…and he massaged me….
The next morning, I woke up at The Clayton Hotel, by Manchester Airport…after the most wonderful time, with the most thoughtful man I had every met.
It couldn’t even be real. It was like a dream….He was IMPRESSIVE. I like to feel impressed, don’t I? And Cupid properly threw in a gem, this time around….It’s like The Gods are trying to show me my options…
I literally haven’t met a more generous, or more thoughtful man ever, who is dripping in sex appeal. He’s not even wet with his kindness. He’s charming. But not fake. He’s real. He’s someone you never need to prompt, because he’s always waaay ahead of you. I love that! He’s really intelligent.
(‘Well, we were only working a couple hours a day. There was a lot of free time. In that time, I got a degree…so I could use it later…Most of the guys don’t think to do that. I even speak five languages now…and run two companies…’)
There’s a sophistication to him, that’s delivered with punctuated fun. He’s not a lose cannon. He’s stable. His feet are firmly on the ground. Yet, at the same time, he’s not ‘vanilla.’
For once, I got to feel like a girl. I got to feel so precious. I got to feel ‘taken care of,‘ instead of ‘having to take care of…’ I know so many women (including myself) who never get to feel like that!
He’s a good person…
Date: ‘I hope you want to see me again…I don’t know what you’re thinking, but I hope so. I’ll message you as soon as I get home…’
I can’t honestly have been that lucky?
Haha…it felt so ‘Pretty Woman.’
What is happening in my life right now?
If i don’t see this guy again, I will officially be the stupidest girl in the world. What a gentleman. What an amazing man. I don’t think i’ve ever been treated that well!!
I took the 10.53, from Platform 3A at Manchester Airport, back home, with my Red Bull…so I could arrive in time for a school run.
Cashier: ‘You know it’s £2.90…’
Me: ‘Yeah…but fuck it, I need it..’
On my train home…
(After some chick gave me daggers and rammed her luggage on wheels into me. Lol. You can’t *ram* me after i’ve just been Princess treated!)
Miss. (who I love) Murphy: ‘The guys in the office who follow you avidly want to know which………he is? Liam has worked out that… Hahaha. This is hilarious!’
Firmonnell: ‘Did you fancy him? He sounds so perfect. How did it go!!!??!!! He’s sexy!’
Laura Grace: ‘Tell me everything…’
Halewood: ‘What happened!!!! You lucky bitch!’
Man sitting next to me: ‘I feel like i’ve seen you before….? Oh shit! I follow you on insta. How was the…’
Bartender Girl: ‘How was it then!!?!’
King Kenny: ‘How did it all go?’
Sarah T: ‘Who is this guy!!!!’
Big Brother Rex: ‘Must’ve been a good… with ya hair like that! 😉 Hahaha. ‘