Being ‘Filthy,’ Diva Strops & Pity Parties ;)

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How many days has it been? I don’t even know? It’s felt like forever…(let me just check…)

No, it’s fine. Monday was my last post. We’re all good. Well, I assume it was Monday, since it starts ‘Happy Monday,’ but let’s face it, you never know with me.

SO MUCH IS GOING ON…IT IS SUCH A BUSY TIME FOR ME.

I did throw a pity party yesterday. I did well and took it out on my best chick ‘Firmonnell.’

Yippppee!

‘It’s your job now.’

‘I know but…I’m throwing a pity party, just go with it… I feel like a thing and not a human…’

‘You ARE human, in fact you’re the best human I know.’

(I can’t stop adoring ‘Firmonnell.’ She’s someone that no matter what’s going on in her life, she’ll always make you feel better. I’m a bit like that…Yet only she notices it.)

Then I threw a moderate ‘almost’ strop on whatsapp last night, (i’m a feisty one and I like that about me,)  but I felt it in my soul and then swallowed my glitzy pride. I chilled on it a second, with my non diet wine..and even though I wanted to EXPLODE….I 37 year old stopped myself. 🙂

This morning I looked down at my phone and read…

‘How’s the diva doing today?x’

‘I nearly went ‘drag queen’ ape on you..’

‘U little shit…What are u doing?’

I’ve committed to both labels...’diva’ and ‘shit’ ..so yeah, just like that…. I’m altogether fine now.

Honest…

(They say ‘i’m fine’ is the biggest lie all humans tell every single minute of every single day. I could’ve just made that up…) 

I’ve just been asked to fly to Paris, but I can’t go because my work load is intense. I’m about to start my health kick and i’m not going to find the ‘health kick’ part hard…I’m doing to find the ‘dealing with the life stress’ bit hard…and i’m gonna miss my giant cocktail slurps.

I had so much to tell you, but i have no clue where to start or what to say now, which isn’t very handy when you’re a blogger.

I’ve danced in my undies in fitting rooms. (I stated on Facebook that I wanted to see your fitting room frolics. I did mean the girls, and all in the aid of empowerment. But only boys responded… Lol….At least I didn’t get any dick pics. I actually and quite thankfully haven’t received any in ages…THAT DOESN’T MEAN I WANT ANY. Here’s a wacky concept, save them for your wives!

(All I can currently smell around me is roast dinners. Stop eating roast dinners around me. I’m about to start my diet. The middle aged lady at the opposite table needs to watch herself because I might eat HER and her dinner.)

But where was I? I danced in fitting rooms. (GIRLS SEND ME YOUR ‘FITTING ROOM’ SELFIES.) I’ve worked, worked, worked, worked and worked. I had to wake up at 3am this morning to ‘online post’ stuff, to hit the time zones. (See! Told you the graft was that easy.) I forgot to schedule a post…So I had to do it manually..I shocked myself up at 2.30am and remembered. I also blind hand patted around in the dark for wine, but couldn’t find any. I’m that much of a loser.

Ruby and I had ‘mummy night’ last night, (Junior was at Keiran’s, his Dad,) so she slept in my bed and does every Mummy night,’ as ofcourse, as always….there’s just me in it.

She must’ve been having the weirdest 2.30am dream, because still asleep she burst into a fit of mad laughter and then shouted…

‘I HAVEN’T WEE’D MYSELF.’

Lord help me through BOTH OF THEIR teenage years. Rubes is like me, so she’s ll be fun, but fine. She’ll just cry over boys all the time. Junior is such a lad, which will be a nightmare. He is the product of two ‘wild ones.’ Only last weekend, the WONDERFUL security at The Frenchgate Centre, in Doncaster, prevented him from trying to wander off and do his own thing. They had to drag him back to Waterstones…because he was sure there was something more exciting happening around the corner.

Keiran might be a Jehovah’s Witness now, yet when I met him YEARS AND YEARS AGO, he was certainly an Ibiza party boy. (He’ll hate me putting that…But whatever…It’s the truth. 🙂 And there’s no shame in anyone’s game of story. I ain’t hating on you boy! We’re co parent an awesome son.) 

But anyway…There I was on March 7th, 2018…2.30am in the morning…in Yorkshire…

I sat up, naked, in the dark, with ‘Rocco’ my kitten and I posted this…

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Nothing is better to ME than ‘FILTHY SENTIMENTS.’ You should all know this, as I harp on about them all the time. I love how open, naughty, outspoken and fun the brand is! (With a classy twist. Like this isn’t some ‘run of the mill‘ cheapo brand. It’s so styled, so well run and each piece of ‘filth‘ is absolutely divine.)

Anyway, incase you didn’t know…I am now the PROUD OWNER of my very own bespoke ‘Filthy Sentiments’ mug…from their new neon range…

AND I F****** LOVE IT.

Yesterday, ‘Filthy Sentiments’ turned over their FIRST MILLION in sales. They’ve only been in business 3 years…and that IS HUGE, to say they specialize in ‘filthy’ gift cards, mugs, note books, pens and now pj’s. That’s not easy!

So, here I am celebrating with ‘Filthy’ because, if anything I want you to be inspired. That took a great deal of hard work. And with fun brands people don’t think that ‘hard work’ happens, because they just see the ‘fun.’

Someone somewhere, came up with an idea, probably over a drink and BOOM….a million pound later…it worked….and it’s only just the beginning.

That is what I’m celebrating!

(And I loved it because on my Insta & Facebook post this morning, I could swear like a pirate on my post.)

FILTHYSENTIMENTS.CO.UK

Get you bit of FILTH NOW!

OH NO…THE PLACE WHERE I’M BLOGGING IS NOW PLAYING SAD LOVE SONGS…I’m too emosh. It’s reminding me of ‘Dancing on Ice.’

Right now, I have a friend away filming a reality show. Lisa (as in Appleton) was also just on Jeremy Kyle with Lauren Harries this morning. My new school/old school diet and work out matey ‘Kate’ reminded me this morning. I missed it. But i’ll see it on catch up.

I love it when Lisa gets feisty.

All girls are hot when they’re feisty.

It’s important that you always stand up for what you believe is right, even when you might be moderately terrified to do so. Make sure, you’re being treated the way you want to be treated. Make sure, you are always staying LOYAL to what you believe in.

The people that give a shit, will stand by you, understand you and love you madly anyway…

Thank you for following my life…

Chrissie,

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HAPPY MOTHERS DAY!

HAPPY MOTHERS DAY TO ALL YOU HOT MAMAS!

Mother’s Day means so much to us in Wunna Land, as ofcourse I am a single mum of two, so I *force* the children to praise me on this with love, laughter and gifts. 🙂 They exceeded themselves this year with the designer clutch that I wanted. Lol. They apparently both smiled and fought there way en route to delivering this gift to me, as Grandmas instructed their path.

Junior: ‘RUBY! DON’T TOUCH HAIR!’

Ruby: ‘Ugh! Junior. Shut up and get this to MUM!!’

Raised so well, I know! 🙂 But whatever, I got the designer clutch that I yearned for. (Thanks Mum 😉 )

And on a more sentimental note, I have THE GREATEST MUM ALIVE. In life, I’ve heard all sorts of stories about people and their mums. Good ones. Bad ones. And i’ve remembered them all. Yet, the reason why I do try to remember them all is to remind myself every moment of every day, how lucky I am to have the most wonderfully loving, supportive, ambitious, gentle, hilarious, feisty, yet total ‘boss it’ mum, as MY MUM. She pretty much created this glamourous ‘beast’ of a unicorn that is ‘Chrissie Wunna.’ I’ve laughed with her, i’ve cried with her, she screamed at me over my bad decisions and high fived me with silent oriental *nods of approval* when i’ve done her proud. The one thing she has NEVER DONE, is EVER leave me emotionally stranded…and I couldn’t thank you enough for that! You & Dad are the reason why I always feel loved.

Ruby & Junior…I couldn’t have done it without you Mama. You made single mummying a breeze.They babies have such great Dads, who are there for them lovingly and always, YET I KNOW that both Pete & Keiran would say CONTINUOUSLY….that we couldn’t have done it without you. THANK YOU. I love you.

See you at lunch this afternoon!

This morning my Mum was at mine house, sat in one of the upstairs rooms and I had Baby Junior walk in with a mini bouquet of fresh hand tied peach roses for her. Then I had Ruby walk into the room with a medium sized bouquet of fresh cut lemon roses for her…and then I walked in, all smiles and with all the charm in the world and presented her with a huge and distinctly glamourous bouquet of fresh lillies. Their aroma swirled through the home. I can even smell them now. But I had to go second, as my brother had decided to wake up at the crack of dawn and slide on in with his card/gift first, to claim the ‘favourite child’ trophy.

I’M A GREAT GIFT GIVER. because I genuinely adore buying gifts for people that I know will surprise them and make them smile. I’m naturally generously and there’s a glow about me whenever I have sent a gift to any human that I adore. I was fine with going second. 🙂 I smashed my flowery entrance. Lol. (Get back in lane Bruv.)

But yes! I hope you’re treating your Mums and I hope if you are a Mum you are being treated or spoiling yourself! 🙂

I’m headed to Ego in Ackworth this afternoon, for Mother’s Day lunch and cocktails, with the family. Both babies did their Mother’s day with me yesterday. they took me out to lunch and spoiled me by tormenting strangers. 🙂 Every Sunday is ‘Daddy day’ in Wunna land, Ruby & Junior will head off to lunch with their fathers!

I’m a single mum,  but I just think it is really important for your children to have the healthiest bond with both parents. If you know us personally, you’ll know that Pete, Keiran and I get on so well, we’re like a family. Both boys will come to me and discuss life problems with laughter. I’ll tell them everything…and it’s a blast watching the kids grow up. We were kids when we had them, so watching us play ‘grown ups’ to these little lives that we created (in hotel rooms Lol) is honestly so rewarding. It’s the biggest BUZZ ever. 🙂 Ruby and Junior are my WORLD.

Okay, I’m off to cocktail!

But I will leave you with this…I got a random phone call yesterday at around 4.30pm from ‘Double D’..

I answer, as I know he wouldn’t be calling me if he wasn’t in some kind of emergency…and this is what I heard…

‘WHAT’S THE CODE!!!!!!!!!!’

‘The code for what?’

‘THE CODE!!! I CAN’T…I DIDN’T…’

‘Oh! LOL. It’s **********’

‘Double D‘ had managed to get himself trapped inside a building with the giant ALARM sounding off and with nothing but PANIC.

Hilarious! He was SHITTING HIMSELF! All I could hear when I answered the phone was FLUSTER and this intense panic in his voice. Lol. Behind him…this CRAZY ALARM background noise, which almost sounded like something from some shitty boys movie. It was all very dramatic. I should’ve hung up for *giggles.* But I didn’t I came to the rescue.

I guess, some Saturdays went better than others…:)

ENJOY THE SUNSHINE! My Summer Song…

 

Gift 6!! It’s WORTH £100!!

 

Morning folks! I’ve had a loong night that was spent dazzling the bright lights of the A&E department of Pontefract hospital. I’m juggling a lot right now, with my mind all over the place. I have the babies, the giveaway, the beauty line, Christmas and The Clothes Show Live tomorrow and even though things seems stressful I am over the moon and brimming over with a glitzy excitment.

Obviously today is a busy day in preparation…so I’m going to SHOOT the NEXT DAY OF GIVING right at you with a *BOOM.*

Gift 6:

DOLLS! TODAY IS…

GOODIE BAG DAY! HURRAH! WGGLES! WINKS!

As you know I recently got a very lovely goodie bag form the darlings at The Clothes Show live…

 

Therefore I figured if I was Glamour Puss enough to be treated to such yumminess in a bag..then so should you!

Has anyone heard of ….

  

 

YEAH BABY!

In celebration of The Clothes Show Live and the fact that I get to cover all the glamour of  it, this year here at chrissiewunna,com, I am giving away a very glitzy gift a day, every day and for 12 days!

The very kind Gods of Glamour at Monsoon/Accessorize have whirled over an AMAZING TREAT for one lucky winner, with a distinct eye for luxury.

In the name of all things ‘goodie,’ I came up with the idea of choosing some deliciously, luxurious winter and somewhat fun items…that I adore and placing them ALL IN MY BAG of ‘GOODIE’….for YOU! *Cheer here.*

Okay…

In your bag…there is one of these chunky, woolly Winter knitted scarves…A definite must for cold kitten necks this season! A Glamour Puss loves to snuggle up warm under the mistletoe. 😉

 

However, because i’m Chrissie Wunna…of course i’ve chosen one in…

CORAL! 🙂

The scarf/wrap retails alone at around £30. Could be yours FOR FREE TODAY, if you’ve been a good girl or boy!

But wait…we can’t let our kitty ears get chilly…so…

You will also be treated to…

 

Yes! Fun fully knitted earmuffs! (The ones I have picked out for you are pink wool and leopard faux fur. 🙂 The ear muffs retail at £16….today they could be yours FOR FREEEE! (Why thank you Wunna!) Gimme! Gimme! Gimme!

Moving on…

Also in your delicious Monsoon/Accessorize goodie bag of glamour…you will find this….

 

…yes….like it could get any better…a shimmering golden, fit for any kitten purse/clutch! It retails itself for £15! It’s in the bag and ready to be WON!

Now we can’t wrap up warm and cover of ears in faux fur without a bit of ‘ooh laa.’

So i’ve also included…

 

These very glamorous earrings! £12

 

…a fun Kooky necklace. It’s actually the cream air bubble one that says ‘I heart U.’ £8

AND OF COURSE..NO MONSOON/ACCESSORIZE GOODIE BAG WOULD BE COMPLETE WITHOUT THEIR TRADITION CHUNKY WOODEN BANGLE

 

Don’t worry I have great taste in chunky wooden’s….the one I have picked IS DIVINE and worth £12.

Oh and i’ ve thrown in a beauty of a flower hair clip, simply to keep your boho alive. £6

So! Kittens!

If you wish to win my gorgeously magical Christmas Goodie Bag filled with perfectly selected Accessorize and Monsoon goodies…which is worth a yummy £100!!! CRAZY I KNOW! AND FROM ME TO YOU FOR CHRISTMAS!

Then all you have to do is answer this question…which of course a Chrissie Wunna fact.

Question: I have a small tattoo on the inside of my right arm. It’s a word and you have to guess it.

The clues are easy, so you’re lucky today! 🙂

It is the 3rd month of the year and also the *blank* in this sentence..

‘……….. to the beat of your own drum.’

Get your answer to me asap via any online channel..Tweet it, Facebook it, Email it Instagram it…just get it to me and you may have a personally picked, Monsoon/Accessorize Goodie bag under your tree this Xmas, from everyone’s favourite Kitty Claus. Me!

THIS GIFT IS WORTH £100!

Jeepers! Get guessing!

 

Starts TOMORROW! See you there!