Life, Business & Bullshit

I love these early morning blogs. (Not really, but i woke up at 4.08 am by accident. My eyes just opened. I can’t even remember what I dreaming about, but it made me haze back into the real world, as Rocco my kitten pawed me for ‘crack of dawn’ fodder.)

I’ve come to the conclusion that 4.08am is a useless time. No one should wake up or especially still be up at that time ever. Nothing happens. It’s boring. Its pointless. I could tell you it’s peaceful. But when there’s zero energy around you, there’s no magic. I hate no magic. I went back to sleep and simply because i’m not that dull. And well there was no wine.

I’m still half tucked in flamingo bed sheets, with my hair bobbled up in a top knot and a bit of peeky boob out. (WE LOVE PEEKY BOOB.) I stayed up later than usual last night watching/following the football. I got pretty hooked and it all ended with excitement and winners….So, it was kinda great to fill my soul with glee because I rested my head. They say if you go to bed with happy ‘feels’ running through your system, you manifest it into your life, as it’s the last thing you think or feel about at night. (My friends Hustle Barbie & Jonesez think about Murderers coming to get them before bed. Such lovely people. With such lovely thoughts. 😉 )

Anyway, Wunna Land is great right now. Work is great. The babies are amazing. I’m feeling wonderful, almost powerful and fueled with absolute ooh laa. There’s an excitement in my kitten eyes. My Va Voom is on point. I’m happy. I’m positive. I’m feeling unstoppable.

The great thing is that i’m not even having to cut out any bullshit from Wunna Land, simply because there isn’t any. (Well that’s not true. I’m also a liar. 😉 ) What I mean is that as soon as ANY bullshit tries to infiltrate it’s way into Wunna land, some crazy ‘trap door’ before it even gets to me, opens up and drops them back into the gutters. I love it! I am emotionally tough and I hate it when people think that i’m this ‘Doll’ of a softie. I’m fun loving, I’m kind….but i’m not remotely an idiot. I laugh the bad times off and i’m lucky right now to have a world filled with wonderful people, moments, family, friends and love. It couldn’t be better. So i’m guess i’m saying to the people that try and tricky dicky their way into MY world with a bucket labelled ‘bullshit,’ do know that we’re all utterly polite here in Wunna land and my soul is ever warm, but you will get told to fuck off, via the fine art of the imaginary TRAP DOOR. (Then Sumo wrestlers in glitter pants come and sit on you. Then Double B might come and rob you. Then Mel might come and swear at you. Fairytale will make you a brew and Firmonnell will laugh.)

I was also having a conversation with a really good friend of mine Abeiku Arthur who owns House of Solo Magazine and a publication business…well he found it hilarious to take the piss out of me for MEN in business NOT taking me seriously.

‘They all try to hit on you, rather than take you seriously as a business woman because you’re hot.’

(Luckily, he doesn’t have that problem. 😉 )

But it’s true. In the last three business meetings i’ve had, three of the guys have inappropriately tried to ask me out. That’s not good business. I guess it’s sometimes flattering, but it’s more than anything annoying and awkward because to me my work is work, it’s really important to me and i’m on my way up, I talented in my own special way and i’m doing the best I can.

My personal life is my own separate thing and that has nothing to do with work. The guy I talk about ‘The Swirl’…I adore him. Every piece of me adores him and I have a one track mind. I’m not promiscuous at all. I’m not easily swayed. When I adore. I adore. And no one can come in and tap dance their way into my heart during that time. ESPECIALLY when the focus should be work or business. Come on Boys, you’re able to work with me or any moderately attractive girl, without thinking with your boner first. You’re not that silly. You should have a classiness to you.

One of my best mates Abeiku Arthur (who i’ve known for ages…) finds it hilarious.

‘What are they even thinking!! Hahaha! They don’t know you at all! Plus, surely you’d smash tons of work at you with success, before trying to make you go on a date with them.’

Anyway, it’s mid week, it’s hump day, I have a lot on, i’m starving. I’m ordering dresses, booking hotels, organizing travel and sorting myself out for Friday, where i’ll be at the Diversity in Media Awards in London. I’m up for a award. I won’t win it. But i’m looking forward to just getting to do something out of Yorkshire, for one glittery evening….Y’know, get away from it all for a night.

Hope you have a wonderful day….

 

 

 

 

Shortcuts, Interviews & Prosecco

‘Are you Chrissie?’

‘Yeah…Hi…’

(I gave her that ‘100 Watt’ Chrissie Wunna beam. 😉 )

‘You write that blog! My daughter reads it. She loves bloggers. She’s mad on them. She’s just bought that book on..what’s his name? Someone.. Dawson?’

‘Aww…yeah…’

(I was polite, because I didn’t exactly know who that was…Yet, neither did she, so I was on safe ground. Lol)

‘Anyway, i’ve started reading your blog. Thank you so much for coming back…’

‘Oh no…I love it here. The kids even love it here…’

The glamourous lady, all tanned and dark haired, with the perfectly pouty lips, sits down in my stylish yet comfy Prosecco Pit Stop booth. (I love Prosecco Pit Stop in Doncaster. It is a frequent afternoon haunt of mine. I used to go all the time when Shaun Applegate owned it, yet since he’s tinkered off to open up a new cocktail bar in the Victoria Gate, Leeds, which I can’t wait to visit once open, I believe this new sassy lady, is the brand new Pit Stop, ‘Boss Lady.’ I love her.)

‘I’ve just called my husband and said *Chrissie’s Here.* He told me to keep you here until he arrives. Lol. I love that blog, the one where your friend goes down on a girl with a Fishermans Friends. Lol. It’s just so hilarious. My 14 year old daughter showed me the post and asked me what it meant! Hahah!’

‘He actually went down on her with a Hall Soother.  ‘

Then we *paused* before a glamorous ‘girl on girl’ belly laugh and as my children returned back from a toilet trip with Grandad….we all, as a family enjoyed our Brushetta Brunch at our favourite little Doncaster Pit Stop.

‘Be good to me…’

Let’s be honest….She literally has nothing to worry about. I mean, if you’re a glamour puss and you own a Pit Stop that serves my body with Prosecco, then I’m probably going to adore you with every delightful inch of my kitten soul. Even if I tried, I couldn’t find a reason to dislike any human of that calibre.

But annnnyway…..

It’s a busy time in Wunna land and I know I keep harping on about how busy things are right now, but it’s pretty much the truth. My world is currently quite scheduled out and I’m feeling really lucky because I seem to have the best help at hand. I’m enjoying all my work, meetings, shoots, afternoon cocktails (I was at Ego yesterday afternoon) and just life in general. Early nights have been my favourite and yeah, i’m slowly but surely, getting everything built up and ready to take the next stiletto steps upward, upon that glitzy ladder of success. (When I say ‘Success,’ I don’t mean diamonds, riches and golden baths of wealth…Even though that really does sound like one of the most delicious plans. Why am I so stupid? That really is a great plan! Success to me is HAPPINESS. Finding your ‘happy’ and achieving it. Doing something that you love and yeah…having other people love and recognise what you do, feels good. I’m not gonna lie. It feels really good.

I write my blog to inspire. I inspire by telling my story. My own version of life. Everything else… comes from that….A really smart human once told me that if you give the world something of VALUE and simply because you LOVE doing it, you bizarrely get ‘Life Love’ back… threefold. It just comes to you. (That’s the ‘Candy Floss’ version of it. Yet, for shortcuts….having a great PR Team, also works just as well. 😉 I learn everything the hard way, so 10 years of tapping out my life as proved to be beneficial. I don’t know why I didn’t ‘shortcut’ the journey? I should’ve shortcutted the journey. Yet, good thing about missing the shortcut, is that fact that it made me SOLID in what I do.

You can say a lot. All that you want…but I’ve hit every road bump with a *BAZINGA.* Lol. Wunna Land is now one slick operation because of it. No one can take that away from me. I know my life. (Sounds weird, but some people still don’t know where they’re headed and that’s completely fine. You don’t have to know. You just have to be comfortable in the unknown zone. Just appreciate all that you have going on RIGHT NOW. Work hard. Have faith. Listen to your gut instincts and you’ll get there.) I don’t actually know what I’ trying to say, other than, if I can do it, ANYONE CAN. Don’t put yourself on a timer. It happens when it’s meant to happen. People…opportunities…everything finds you when it’s mean to. I’m only saying that because I always used to put myself on a timer.

Shortcuts are great. They’re great. But only when you’re ready. And i’m ready now…I’m all stable and filled with Va Voom. Yet with anything in life, be it in work or love…if you wish for longevity and not a short glittery *pan flash…* it takes the leg work.

Talking about my Va Voom, it’s certainly on point right now. Lol. I definitely heard ‘Firmonnell’ accidentally call me her ‘partner’ instead of her ‘colleague’ and my 20 something year old work colleague  ‘Jonesez’ kept sauntering around me and blushing…because he has some weird Asian girl fetish.

‘Why are you being weird and fancying me right now?’

‘Have you heard ya’self!!!

‘Is it the boobie thing?’

‘Hahah. No it’s the Asian thing.’

He hates feet though.

I have a busy week ahead. Junior’s loving school. Ruby’s loving life. And on Friday I have the Diversity in Media Awards. I’m up for ‘Blogger of the Year.’ I still haven’t bought a dress and I’ve completely run out of foundation. I forgot to go on my diet and had buckets of Piri Piri chicken wings and bread all weekend. But whatever….having bread wasn’t cheating on my diet. Trying to EVEN BE ON A DIET during the weekend, is surely cheating on BREAD.

I actually had so much other stuff to tell you today, but i’ve forgotten to *tap* it all out. Haha! Yipppee! It’ll have to wait until the next one. This blog has gone on too long today.

Yesterday there was a Chrissie Wunna Q & A in Inscriber Mag…. thanks to Kind Publishing. Incase you missed it…

Here’s the link for you to go and check it out…

http://theinscribermag.com/glamour-girl-burmese-beauty-q-and-a-with-glamour-model-author-and-blogger-chrissie-wunna/

 

 

Work, Success & Sex With Inflatables?

Gosh! It’s such a busy time. I have this mountain of glittery work to get through, in order to get Wunna Land to where it needs to be, for the birth of the New Year. I’m looking at it, in the highest of heels, with a Vivienne Westwood handbag and a puzzled face that can only suggest confusion. 😉

Right now, I have opportunity a knocking and it’s knocking on every door that my kitty kingdom could possibly handle. I’m not really talking about much of it, because i’m on work mode. But there ARE people that I do tell things to in confidence, like ‘Firmonnell’ and ‘The Swirl.’ They’re the two people that I seem to tell everything to….Oh and also my Mum. She’s a diamond. A stress head. But a diamond.

I’m really excited and i’m honestly really grateful to be fair, yet finding the TIME to do well and progress, y’know ‘fitting it all in’ is not that easy and things are much more knackering at thirty something. Haha. Doesn’t matter how glamourous you are! You can still do ya back in. It’s a juggle. A juggle that I CAN quite easily cope with. I love to be busy when it comes to work, just as much as I like to chill. I don’t like pressure, or rushing, But productivity, I enjoy. However, because I’m bloated and feeling moderately hormonal this week, I’m choosing to be dramatic about it all. Best thing about being a girl. If you ARE a girl, you’ll get it. If you ARE a guy…well the sooner you get it the better.

I reckon that no matter what business, profession or ‘Pachinga’ (don’t care if that’s not a word) you’re in…the lead up to the end of the year, is ALWAYS really hectic. IT’S MADNESS, I’ll tells ya! There needs to be more hours in the day.

Last night I literally slept for around 3 hours, just to fit all my work in and then got up at the crack of dawn to get ahead of myself. I KNOW! Lol. Yet, the most wonderful thing, away from all the ‘glitter’ is that my baby Junior smashed his first day of school. He smashed it…and I was so worried, that he would be terrified. I was SO worried, that he’d not adjust. But he loved it. He can’t wait to go again. Ruby troopered her Big Sister role and BOOM…as a mum NOTHING FEELS BETTER. (I did it. They’re both in school.)

Right now, even though i’m busy, i’m feeling like life is good. Pretty good. I’m feeling lucky and I reckon I have you lot to thank for that. I mean, this blog is on its merry way up for some reason and i’m not trying to give the clichéd ‘I love you’ speech. I’m just trying to say ‘cheers’ because if I actually one day wake up and find that Wunna Land has been walloped with some ‘taken over’ stamp of utter superstar success…It honestly will be because of you. You practically will have MADE me. So, yeah, cheers.

If i’m being honest, i’m quite confident that i’ll get there. I’m confident by nature. YET, i’m a hustler….A glamourous ‘grafter,’ as it’s done gracefully ofcourse. My First Husband didn’t use to call me ‘Dynamite’ for no reason. 😉 However, I am by no means delusional. I hate delusional people. I’m a patient girl and I do things correctly, with winks and that’s after learning things the hard way. I don’t strike while the irons hot. I strike when i’m ready and everything is set in place. It’s important for me to build and make impact when all is set in place, MORE than it is, to be fickle with a *whip* and shoot out the canon before i’m ready.

Other than that…Yesterday (and I don’t know how this occurred) Firmonnell, Hustle Barbie & Jonesez decided to have a conversation about humans are in committed relationships with inflatables.

Jonesez: ‘This one guy on Youtube is married to a bunch of inflatables.’

Me: ‘Yeah, But i think that’s funny. I want to be married to a bunch of inflatable people.’

Jonesez: ‘No, they’re not people…they’re random objects, like banana’s and rubber rings and ink flamingos.’

WHY ARE PEOPLE SO FUCKING WEIRD??? I love it! I do love it. I find it hilarious. But why? I don’t get it??

Firmonnell: ‘I won’t let you say COMMITTED RELATIONSHIP with an inflatable. It’s ridiculous!!’

HOW THE HELL AS AN INFLATABLE RUBBER RING MANAGED TO HAVE A BETTER LOVE LIFE THAT HALF THE WOMEN ON THIS EARTH??? Lol.

(Girls, if a guy can commit and propose to a pink flamingo because he can’t live without it, and you still don’t have a ring on it yet…let me tell you…..you’re fucked. We’re fucked. It makes me lose my faith in mankind. Hahaha. Yet, it can’t stop being hilarious.)

Then Hustle Barbie forced me to watch some video (when i say ‘forced,’ she just showed me it and I watched it…I’m just dramatic today, I told you,) anyway it was a video of a guy making out with his car, THAT HE WAS HAVING A COMMITTED SEXUAL RELATIONSHIP WITH?

Hustle: ‘How do you have sex with a car?’

Jonesez: ‘You sit on the gear stick.’

And it’s the moments like that, that take the pressure OFF you, OFF life, because you just remember how to have a big old laugh, you remember how to love and notice that you have great people and support around you. It’s take the stress of ‘busy’ and reminds you of the fact that shit ain’t so bad. 😉

Then after I moaned…a friend of mine, who again is the most hilarious human that I have ever been lucky enough to have cross paths with….sent me this…(They also stated that it was ‘a bit cheesy but had substance.’)

‘There’s something so beautiful about a woman who believes in herself, who knows she’s capable of doing anything she sets her mind to.’

It made me beam and last night, because of that I slept like a Goddess…..

 

Busy Minds & Early Nights…

A good day. I mean I’ve nothing to be complaining about really. I’m in a good place. But my minds busy. It’s so busy. I can’t rest it. It’s tiring me out and it’s filled with bundles of work and trundles of thought. I’m even going to have to ‘early night’ it, simply to chill my head. Calm it down. Give it some peace. This month, there’s a lot of work and excitement going on in Wunna land. My Land. So, like I said, it’s nothing bad. Infact, quite the opposite…it’s actually ALL REALLY GOOD. My kitten mind is just doing a jive and right now, I cant make it stop. It has a lot of energy.

Y’know, this only ever happens when I have a great deal going on, or there’s a wee bit of pressure that I kinda have to shimmie alongside. During times like this, I tend to go all quiet and withdraw. It helps me focus. Don’t fret. It’s all fine. I just need to rest my mind to pan pipe music or something lame like that. Lol. (Pan Pipe music always reminds me of that INSANE Chinese Lady in Camden who was in charge of massaging me and delivering total enlightenment to my soul, yet instead almost broke every fricking bone in my body. Haha. What a bitch! J  Don’t go there. SHE’S CRAZY!)

I’m writing my book, my audition went well..

Firmonnell: ‘You’re gonna get that…

and i’m shooting strong.

When it comes to all that. I’m pretty confident.

I have the Diversity in Media awards in 11 days. It’s such an honour. I’m way out my depth. I want to win the award. I won’t win it by any means. Yet, I feel really lucky to have been nominated and then shortlisted in such a great league, amongst some of the nations best talent! It’s insane and such a wonderful award to be representing. So, i’ll do my red carpet strut, tinker my MTV interview like a kitten and just enjoy my evening…(code for NETWORK the Hell out of Wunna Land. 😉 ) It’s being live streamed anyhow, so you’ll get to watch me lose. I’ll do that ‘Ah so happy for the winner’ face for you…then i’ll drink loads and do selfies with everyone.

Away from all that, life is great. I’m feeling really positive. I’m feeling gentle. I’m feeling beautiful. When a girl feels beautiful, she feels like she can conquer anything and it’s the single most divine feeling. Then all my chick friends all decided that they wanted to join some ‘fat club,’ that they’ve made up themselves, where in which they’ll all put in £1, weight themselves weekly at Boots (lol,) only in the name of ‘slimming’ and then whoever has lost the most weight, gets all the quids. Hahah!

Me: ‘I’m not arsed about playing the weighing game. I feel alright right now. I’m all curve happy.’

Firmonnell: ‘Yeah, but we want you’re quid.’

Me: ‘I’ll just watch you all and cheer you on.’

Firmonnell: ‘Yeah, but we want you’re quid.’

Me: ‘Hahah. I’m happy right now and this weighing game will make me all competitive and make me feel like i need to lose a pound just to win and beat you all. It’s pointless and stress for no reason.’

Mel: ‘I’m doing it. It’ll just have to be us.’

I look at Firmonnell…

Me: ‘You told me that looks don’t matter, that it all FADES and that all anyone has to be is FUNNY, so you’re not bored with whoever you’ve chosen to be with.. when you’re 80.’

This all came about because her hubby ‘Big D’ might go on a ‘lose a few pounds’ diet, after someone called him fat. This diet wouldn’t matter because obviously she’s married to him, she’s loves him madly and would love him madly always and anyway, until the say she dies. We all would.

I mean GOD, when I love someone, I love them no matter what. As time passes and you’ve built your bond, it becomes unconditional and nothing can break it, if it’s real. To me it doesn’t matter what they do, where they’re from, how chubby they’re getting…If i love & respect them and they love & respect me too….then that’s pretty much all that’s matters. I have NO CLUE how Big D’s ‘maybe diet,‘turned into a whole weighing game at Boots? Hahaha. That’s chicks for ya!

But this is guys for ya! I’ve just checked my Snapchat and one of my guy friends (he’s only a young 20 something) is looking or an ‘extra money’ Sunday job, because he managed to spend £300 on strippers in an hour on Friday night. Lol. If anyone needed love or a girlfriend more…it’d probably be him right now. He’s actually super romantic and can’t even cope without having someone to love. SO GIRLS. There you have it. If you wanna date my mate, inbox me and i’ll set you up. You’ll only have to dance to a Little Mix track for 3 minutes and you’ll at least make £20….but then you’d have to make him his tea.

I’m so glad i’m a grown up. Haha.

I mean, who can be arsed with being 20 something nowadays? It’s a shambles. Lol. Thirty something is so much sexier, as it’s dashed in a sensible whirl of duty. Yet you can still rock it in Louboutins,clink a cocktail and  strut it like a fox. Thirty something, be you a girl or guy…is HOT AS HELL. There’s a classiness to it. A ‘hey baby, i’ve lived and learnt, a little.’ (Do know that i’m only saying this because i’m a’thirty something.’ When i’m a ‘forty something,’ or even a ‘fifty something,’ that will be the new hot.)

Right, I said I was early nighting it, so i’ll love you and leave you!

But once again, thank you so much for following my life. It means a lot. I hope that somewhere in this absolute decade of blogging you find a piece of Wunna land that inspires you….

 

 

 

 

Girl Banter, Wine & Dance Routines

Firmonnell: ‘I just love it. Whenever I hear it, it makes me feel like I want to make up some kinda dance routine. Haha.’

(We’re in our thirties…this is not normal.)

Me: ‘Lol. That’s exactly what I said, when I first heard it?’

(Because i’m just as immature.)

Double B: ‘What song is it…?’

And unfortunately for life, Firmonnell and I proceeded to perform the song..well attempt to sing it for Double B, just so she could get which song we were on about? We’d totally forgot what it was called? But it’s that ‘Instruction’ song by Demi Lovato.

Double B: ‘What song? I don’t get it?’

(Her 21 year old ears don’t even work.)

Me: ‘We’re not even singing it shit!!! GOD!!!’

She finally got it. Sanity was restored. The world became a shimmie and well she might have delivered the sentence…

‘Get on my tits’

…as she Sumo Wrestler, knee bended, during the ‘morning part’ of the day.

Then i wished we had prosecco. Kisstory played on in the background….and Russian Roulette was the only game that our phones would allow us play.

Nights out were reconfirmed. Liars were worshipped. Then the girls decided to imagine what i’m next wedding would be like. All the laughs. *Rolls Eyes.* 🙂

Firmonnell: ‘We would be in the SLUTTIEST bridemaids dresses that anybody would have ever seen!!!’

(Who said they’d be wearing dresses? I might make them adorn their crotches with fig leaves, or a single peacock feather. Naked isle strutting! Wahey!)

Double B: ‘I want you to walk down the isle and do an outfit change half way down…I want your first outfit to just slip off your body magically, to reveal your second outfit…Hahaha.’

Me: ‘Hahaha. It’s like the Britians Got Talent Bloopers! I wanna walk to the top of the isle, forget to look at my husband and strike a pose for a  selfie… just for ‘Insta’ likes.’

We had a great day. I was surrounded by the best chick click ever. I’m so lucky. I love my girl besties. But we totally gave zero fucks today and laughed off all danger with sarcasm, lies and should i get that ‘coconut, chilli chicken salad today’ questions.

Sometimes in life, you just have to give zero fucks about things. Have fun. God! We’re a long time dead. If you can’t cut an atmosphere with a burst of good times, then you certainly are not living right.

Then ‘Hustle Barbie’ saunters in, all glamourous, hot and blond. She’s off to her fancy dress party tomorrow night….as ‘Sandy from Grease.’ Luckily she’s going as Sandy, when she’s all ‘skin tight leggings and hip wiggles’ and not the crying in a giant nighty version.

Do remember that in that movie… when Sandy’s all pure and demure,  ‘Zucko’ pretends to not give 2 shits, as he’s far too busy ‘pussy wagonning’ with the boys. Yet when she’s all Sassy and ‘look at me bitch’ he’s all of a sudden got ‘chills that are multiplying’ and a boner that will love only her forever. Interesting!!!

Anyway, back to the story….I got distracted! I’m not sure what happened, because I was just rocking from side to side on an orange swizzle chair and not listening to anyone in my turtle neck, but Double B, did state that ‘Hustle B’ would be totally fucked because see was certainly about to meet someone, where in which the ability to ‘sign language’ would be an absolute must….

Double B: ‘But you don’t know sign language, so you’re just gonna have to make it up. Lol. Is that a dictionary?’

Hustle Barbie: ‘Eww! No…It’s eyelashes.’

Welcome to my world.

Then as I continued to swizzle about on a chair and not listen to much, as ‘No Scrubs’ played on the radio and no one could find a pen… Firmonnell retold the story of the moment Double B sauntered in and looked…well she described her as this…

‘She came in like a 1920’s washer woman, no face on, her skin transparent…and with a messy top knot in. Hahaha. She looked like someone from Downtown Abbey…but who lived in the cellar!’

Hahahaha. I love that!!!!! You know you have great friends when you can refer to each other as cellar gremlins.Just a great day!

Not sure what else happened? Aside from Firmonnell deciding that she didn’t like her hubby ‘Big D’ in a vest…Apparently the only way she can get him to not wear one is if they have sex…

‘At least, he’d take it off then.’

Hahaha.

YES! I’m all for her ‘let’s have sex so you don’t fashion crime around me’ policy. Why is she not Prime Minister?

To be honest, my day ended up being a long one, a busy one, a stressy one…You know the score… I’m just glad it’s the weekend! I’m so excited for peace. I’m gonna chill, enjoy family time, have a wine and write the rest of my book. (It’s out in the New Year. I’ve had people read extracts and apparently it’s rude but okay.)

I mean, on the whole i’ve had a good day, it just ended mentally, which doesn’t help relaxation mode.. I just wanted to get home. I couldn’t wait to get home. But if we (the girls and I) didn’t see adult twins in matching outfits, the cast of Gangman style, a young wannabe ‘heart throb’ use our window as a ‘hair doing’ mirror and a weird dude in an S & M biker hat and nipple vest walk by…I don’t know what we would’ve done all afternoon?

As soon as I got home, I stripped down to comfies, adored my little babies, ordered in a ‘take out’ and watched a motivational video that my Mentor sent me.

Unfortunately i have a short attention span….I like short bursts, rather than long winded stories. Which is weird because I tell long winded stories on here constantly. Lol. But I kinda watched the beginning and fast forwarded it to the end.  🙂 That’s how impressively studious I am. It just got too dramatic and boring. I just don’t need a shouty American to tell me to be driven. I AM driven. I just do it my way…which is calmly… with a cocktail. My eye is NEVER not on the prize. Don’t get it twisted. I’ve not done that bad in life. 😉

I even sent the video on. have no clue why? I just felt like it. But it seems that if you’re already driven and already successful, you’re not too arsed about a motivational video because you don’t really need one. If I can watch it and be bored, then I must be in a good place.

Right…I need wine…

 

 

 

Saturday, Leeds Games & Glamourous Trumping

Me: ‘But sex is a big part of  relationship…’

Chica: ‘Yeah but he’s rubbish at it…’

(Sips Cocktail)

Me: ‘Yes, but have you only had sex once…because sometimes it takes a few goes, to get in line with each others ooh laa…?’

Chica: ‘No…it’s just awkward and not in sync. I’m doing these bedroom faces that aren’t true to his work..?’

Me: ‘HAHAHAHAH! Are you good at sex though? As I reckon loads of girls must be shit at sex, because so many men are always on the look out for it. They take really good ‘i’m good at sex’ selfies, but are shit when it comes to the art of it all. Show him what to do?’

Chica: ‘Show him what to do? He’s a grown ass man. Plus, i’m too shy…’

Me: ‘If you’re shy with the man you fancy in the bedroom, then you’re shit at sex.. There’s only you and him there…It’s not like i’m watching on and judging your thrusts??? Lol.’

Then to our disgrace a guy in a group of boys, who were at the bar also watching last night’s Leeds game does the LOUDEST, most GIANT TRUMP, in the history of the world ever…HAHAHAH….Properly.. with no shame, he just lets it blow. It shattered the mirror of stress, everyone paused and then with ‘throw head back’ smiles, laughter burst through the airs…It didn’t even smell of egg….Kinda smelt like Jean Paul Gautier. Impressive.

Random Guy: ‘Steady on Paul! FUCKS SAKE!’

I love trumps when people don’t care. Hahahaha!

Leeds won. Life was great. I admire my friend Kate’s new kitten hair. I had spent the whole day with the children at the fair in Doncaster. (If you didn’t know, Doncaster is my home town…I go there a lot, so The Wunna Babies and I are a hit down at the old Frenchgate. Lol)

They fun housed, rode motorbikes, hooked ducks and then won fucking fish. IF YOU’RE A PARENT….you get how awful this is! We already have a NEW KITTEN. I’m like flipping Noah’s Arc or something? How can I go from nothing, to a kitten and  fish in days!! Then I had carry these fish around in a tank, with people awwing at me, a security man following me, two bags of Lush bath bombs, 2 bags of books from Waterstones, a bloody whistle, emoji cookies and with my hair stuck on my freshly lip glossed lips. Devastating. It should be a children’s book..‘When Mummy is a glamour puss and had to carry your shit home.’ 

I couldn’t take it any more and demanded that we go to Ego for new steak sandwiches and 2 for 1 cocktails. We’ve had lunch there about 4 times this week. To be honest, at the request of Ruby. Yesterday…I needed Ego and I smashed that salted rimmed margarita like a champion, as Junior made me a car with sparkles on, which looked like a clay poo with sequins and brought me a tiny buttercup. I love the ‘Arts & Craft’ table at the restaurant….You’re kids can make clay things, as you recover and drink wine. It’s creative and educational…honest! 😉

Long, but great day! Ruby decided to be a lawyer and Junior decided that be wanted to play football just so he could kick a ball into my boobies all day?  He laughed about it for about 3 hours. (I’m doing everything with a kitten in my arms.)

I then got home, striped down to my bra and frillies, chilled and sent a message to the guy that I ‘heart’ and the world swirled down to a happy magical ending, as day turned to night…and Saturday turned ‘lights out.’

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

What Chu Know ‘Bout Me? Part Uno!

As I cocktail, lunch and spend time with my little ones, dipped in a diamantee haze and shimmied over in a festival of winks, here…my sassy little heros is a ‘What chu know ‘bout me’ blog…I asked for your questions…you gave me them…I’ve answered them…

Cue music… (Before I start, do know that a bundle of gentleman did try to use this opportunity to get to ‘inappropriately’ chatter with me. I didn’t reply, because I only asked for your questions. I don’t need to get ‘hit on’ right now, just so you could enjoy a bit of a boner. Then there were other guys who were strange and sent me messages simply reading…‘ANYTHING?’ Again, I didn’t reply……because obviously I DID SAY ‘ASK ME ANYTHING.’ Read it, ask a question…get an answer, Simple process. 😉 Glad we got that cleared up….

Cue tune…

Q: Do you date Larger men?

A: Large where? 😉

Q: You’re a blogging hero…How did you turn your everyday life into a business…?

A: I think the blog ended up doing well because I stuck at it. It’s the only thing that I’ve ever been disciplined enough to do throughout 10 years…almost every day. It happened by itself & is a success because I love it so much. I’ve worked really hard.

Q: Will you get married again?

A: Yes. I’ll get it right this time.

Q: Favourite Book?

A: ‘My Booky Wook’ by Russell Brand

Q: Favourite thing to eat?

A: Sashimi

Q: Is being a glamour model as great at is seems?

A: It depends on what YOU love to do. To me…yeah. It’s been the best job in the world. You kinda have to be savvy, stay safe, be emotionally tough and not get lost in the bullshit that comes with it. Just focus on it being work…and nothing more.

Q: Does the ‘Casting Couch’ still happen?

A: In LA…yes massively. In England…well…not as much, but YES…definitely.

Q: How was Paris Hilton in real life?

A: She was great and a smart girl. That show served me so well…I learnt so much at the same time as entertaining. I love reality tv. I love being on it….It’s such a buzz.

Q: Chocolate bar or bag of crisps?

A: Bag of crisps every time!!

Q: Favourite cocktail?

A: I love all cocktails. I can drink anything. Literally. I can drink most humans under the table…but only when it comes to cocktail drinking. I love a Bloody Mary when i’m hung over. I love a salted rimmed margarita at Ego. I adore a good mai tai. I’m a creature of habit…I will always get the same drink/food in a particular bar or restuarant EVERY time.

Q: What don’t we know about you?

A: I’m soft when it comes to love and matters of the heart. I also built a brand on being glamourous and wild…when I’m really quite together and sensible. Still fun though…Still glamourous…just chilled and not lost. Lol. I’m funny. I have an ace sense of humour and i’m way more down to earth that people imagine. I’m allergic to nuts. I’m great at keeping secrets.

Q: What do you find unattractive in men?

A: Bad manners. Lost boys. Bad sex. Men who don’t know how to love, protect or look after a woman. I’m traditional in the most unconventional way.

Q: Can I take you out?

A: Everyone asks me that. I’m a rubbish date. 🙂

Q: What sex toy did you create for Ann Summers?

A: Lol…an anal vibrator or beginners called ‘The Learning Curve‘ 🙂 There was actually a whole range.

Q: What’s your favourite sex position?

A: I love all sex ….I’m playful in the bedroom. Yet not promiscuous. Meaning, if I’m WITH a long term partner…we will be having the best sex ever. Lol

Q: How do I become a blogger?

A: Start one. Mine started in LA via a barista in a coffee shop, who thought it would be an online hit one day….;) Being a blogger is the best job i have ever had and personal lifestyle blogging is hard, as the only thing you’re blogging about is yourself…so you have to hope it catches on..it’s not like writing a parenting blog, or a beauty blog, or a restuarant review. Yet if it does catch on, you’re onto a winner, as no one can write about YOUR LIFE better than you.

Q: Key to writing a great blog?

A: Be honest. Nothing in my blog is fabricated. It all happens. Everyone is a real person…if anything i leave things out…I could do with being MORE honest. Yet since it’s got bigger, i’ve weirdly become more careful…which i don’t like.

Q: Worst thing that has ever happened to you?

A: So much has happened. Homeless in New York was pretty bad. Yet i aced it. I felt cheery through the whole thing and survived it. Anytime i have my heart broken is always the worst. I hate that feeling…..I hate it….and i always try and brave face it, which sucks.

Q: Northern or Southern?

A: Northern.

Q: Best time of your life?

A: I am so lucky to have had SO MANY ‘BEST TIMES IN MY LIFE’ to the point where I can’t even believe all i’ve achieved. Kinda everything i’ve wanted to do, i’ve managed to do somehow? I don’t know how? It’s been utterly surreal. I guess, you get what you’re mean to get? Sometimes you can work really hard for something and it doesn’t materialize and other times you don’t and it’s delivered to you with bells on? I cannot believe some of the things that have happened to me!

Q: Finer things in life or to slum it?

A: Right, I always say i’m chilled and I am…yet I am bouji by nature, so I enjoy the finer things in life. I’m well balanced. So I can sit in your comfies and smash a nandos on your sofa, or dine in the finest places in all the land. I’m happy either way. Weird innit?

Q: Do you think you’ll win the Diversity in Media Awards?

A: No. I want to though.

Q: Where do you hope your blog end up?

A: Where? I hope it takes over the entire world, but MADLY. I’m half way there. 😉

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Boys, Emojis & Fire Talk

Y’know when you just can’t find your way out of a fricking carpark!! No? Just me then. 😉 FFS.

Lord knows what happened, but I got into the carpark with a shimmie, hair toss and maybe even a wink….yet getting out the fucker was like some kind of comedically trippy maze. I drove round and round, up and down, parked up, waved at concerned people, like I totally knew what I was doing, pondered, adjusted my bra, glossed my lips and finally after about 17 minutes, I found my way out. 🙂 Welcome to my world. I’ll definitely make someone a good wife one day. I CAN’T EVEN GET OUT OF CARPARKS. (However, do note, there are other things i CAN DO and well…so bare with me.)

Life is great otherwise. Ruby, Junior and I have a new kitten, after many name changes (Sammi/Beckham/Harry/Sprint…) and after I felt bad from taking it from a weeping child,

Mel: ‘Chrissie…just leave with the kitten. Take it…NOW.’

… we finally all agreed on ROCCO. So Baby Rocco, full name ‘Rocco RoMEo’ is our new kitty addition. Hurrah! He’s amazing. We love him. (We don’t know how to look after pets, so it will be a challenge. I mean how hard can it be? I raised two humans on my own.)

But yes, I’ve been a busy glamour puss, but a chilled one all at the same time. I’ve nothing too hardcore other than posing and pouting for a camera to endure, after a stint of secret filming…until the 21st…so i’m just enjoying the downtown…until i have to step it all up and write a book and tend to a lash line relaunch.. without wine.

I had a chat with my guy friend ‘Marbles’ the other day…and it’s weird how men think? We’re wired so differently….He adores this girl…that he kinda knows…and well this is how our convo went down..

Me: ‘So you fancy her, she’s single, but you’re not gonna tell her?’

Marbles: ‘Yes.’

Me: ‘Hmm…? I can see how that works? NOT! Lol. Girls hate that. We want you to be all masterful..well brave..It makes us feel femme…all of us want some hero, you know that. What was the last message you sent her?’

Marbles: ‘A thumbs up emoji. Lol. And Nah. She might turn me down…I’m flirty but she’s way out of my league…’

WHAT!!! WHAT IS GOING ON? WHAT IS HAPPENING TO MEN! We’ve terrified them. There isn’t leagues. (Well maybe there are leagues.) But there isn’t any leagues. Lol. Nothing is hotter than being brave and expressive regardless. A ‘thumbs up’ emoji is odd to a girl. To us, it means you either didn’t know what to say, didn’t have time to say or even worse couldn’t be bothered to say…

You have one life to live, one honey to woo, a wifey to maybe commit to in the end. And I do know that ‘steady treading’ is always very sensible, as I do believe that the guy or girl that stands the test of time, is one that is worth all your love, if you fancy them and they have a snuggled a cosy spot in your heart.

Yet love isn’t sensible, it’s an emotion, it’s not something that calculated logically. It’s something you feel and can’t help but feel, even if you’ve going through a bumpy run or an easy peasy ‘slip n slide.’ I’m always expressive, too expressive…so expressive, that I have zero qualms or fear when it comes to  delivering how I feel about anyone or anything…it’s how I’M wired. It makes me a good blogger and a decent telly personality. 😉 Yet, it’s just struck me that some people are quite willing to forget that they one shot to ‘go for it’ and instead will go for ‘nah, she’s out of my league.’ EH?

Then ‘Marbles’ (and i’m referring to him as that because he’s certainly lost his) went on to say…

‘Like you. Wunna land is a pretty daunting place to approach..’

Me: ‘No, it’s not, not if you have your OWN LAND going on. Then you’re comfy, you feel all confident. It’s normal. I hate it when people are daunted by Wunna land because it makes me feel like they’ve judged me. Aww no. It’s not me is it? HAHAHA… I’m not your Woo Woo am I…cos I don’t..’

Marbles: ‘Hahah…Nope you big headed bitch. Lol. Men aren’t like that. We’re always a bit sketchy, until we fall head over heels and that happens when we know we can trust the girl. When we feel safe.’

Me: ‘That sounds very girly to me. It’s like a Backstreet boys track. Yeah she might not fancy you, but you’ll know if she does….she’ll tell you, or even better show you… YEEeeeah!’

Marbles: ‘I hope you die an old lonely cat lady…’

Me: ‘Hahahaha. Not only did my friend Kate TELL ME that i now have a Cat Lady starter pack with Rocco, but fuck you because my love life isn’t even that shit right now. 😉 ‘

Marbles: ‘You’re in a swirl…’

Me: ‘It’s pretty good. Infact so good that I might need a wine to celebrate…’

At the end of the day, you work hard, you play hard and well you’ve kinda just godda have that good old faith in love. If someone adores you, no matter what, where or how, they will always still be stood there..even when the mist has risen. If not, you’re sat in your tight t shirt playing the ‘shoulda woulda coulda‘ game (which is shit) or crying into your Louboutin wearing fruity gin sessions. Faith in love (without you realizing) gets you through shit and I MEAN IT. I mean god my time in LA was so emotionally INSANE that it was almost a work of art. I was happy through it and I sailed it with flying colours unscathed. It was only when I got back home to Yorkshire, did a tv show with Hilton, looked back and reflected on LA and thought shit, how the absolute hell did I get through all that smiling. But I did. And yeah I might be thirty six now…and yeah i’ve shimmied with the best…but let me tell you i have NEVER in my entire life felt as empowered and I do now.

The time i’m going through right now is probably the best time of my entire life…and that’s saying something. Like I don’t have to look back and hold onto my ‘misty watercolours’ wistfully as i’m currently SMASHING IT. Someone close to me always whatsapps me and says, ‘You’re on fire, babe’ and makes me feel good because I never would have imagined it.  Y’know, a lot of hard work, glitter and ‘fingers crossed’ has gone into this year and it will continue until the end of the year. I’ve kinda winged it. But i’ve done it. I’m doing it. You can do anything. Remember that! Just go for it. If people don’t like it, fuck’em.

On the whole…I’m buzzing…and not even needing to do it in a Wonderbra and anytime that happens you know you’re winning at life.

Ps/ I’m up for Blogger/Podcaster of the year for the Diversity in Media awards…I kinda wished i tried harder to make everyone vote for me now. Voting has closed and I tinker to the event in September. There’s hit loads of people up for awards like Graham Norton, Rio Ferdinand…some other folk…I keep needing to blink and think and realize that life is all ace!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Time, Family & A bit of Shania in Weaves

Yesterday ‘jazzed’ up a bit. I mean fair enough it wasn’t the height of utter excitement. (I’m beginning to think, you have to create your own. Lol) However, it was mildy more ‘buzz’ like.

There was definitely a moment where in which ‘Double B’ and I glamourised an outside corner by some church steps. Is it a church or a castle? Who knows? Nice steps though. Far too nice to do your prayers on. Anyway, she’s sat there with her bootilicious derriere, newly plumped lips, big eyelashes and fresh blond extensions and I’m stood by her, (i like to stand, it makes me feel dominant…lol) with my boobies, dark black weave, cougar lips and exotic tan. How we didn’t burst into flames, I don’t even know? 😉

Anyway, most people on steps by churches, would probably ponder life in a normal, more educated fashion…we decided to get ourselves confused over a girls ‘This is how I woke up top,’

Double B: ‘I thought the whole point to wearing that top was the fact that you’re meant to look glam in it, not like a scruff. Not like you really have actually JUST WOKEN UP’ like that.

Then we chatted more shit, ridiculed our good friends and sang Shania Twain tracks that we forgot even existed. We went with ‘That don’t impress me much! 

Double B: ‘What are you even singing? WHAT A BANGER THAT SONG WAS.’

Me: I’ve kinda jumbled all her songs into one and they’re all coming out my mouth at the same time???

Then with a hair toss, a pout, an adjustment of the old bra….we strutted away and back to business.

Not much else happened, apart from making fun of my friend David, who needs to man up and learn the art of ‘the chase.’ He’s about to go on a date with a girl we both know, who’s a great sassy fit for him…and he’s heel clicking to love songs and everything ALREADY. Lol. The sweet thing about it, is that he’s happy. I love happy people. The other sweet thing about it all is that it’s lovely to see a GUY so excited about a girl.

David: ‘I just haven’t been this excited about a date in a long time. ‘

I think it’s lovely, but even ‘Fairytale Blond’ had to tell him to calm down a bit.

Hustle Barbie: ‘David! You need to keep her on her toes. Girls don’t like that full on stuff….’

I’m ALL for a bit of full on. Lol. So i’m with him on that mark. I think he should move with his romantic foot forward! It shows BALLS.

But then talking about balls, we all got distracted, as Ms.White tinkers up to us all mid banter, whops out her phone and shows us a video o a naked dancing man, with a semi on, dancing….

Me: ‘WHo’s that!?!’

Ms.White: ‘My boyfriend, I took it of him last night. Not really…HAHAHAHAHA. IT’S ACE.’

Ms.White’s actually quite funny because she got so burnt sunbathing on holiday, but only ON ONE side, so she kinda looked like an Drumstick lollipop. She said, she had to run away from people all holiday because they kept trying to ‘lick her.’ Hahaha.

A fun day. Good times. I’m mentally chilling before I set off for exciting stuffs, that I can’t tell you about.

I’ve actually been having a few Mummy problems with Ruby and Junior, as they’ve been fighting a lot of recent and when you’re a single mummying it…things aren’t easy, because there’s just you. I have to work hard. I have to make a living. I have to balance it all with love and time. Two nights ago they FOUGHT like they hated each other. That’s never happened before. I never let that happen.

Last night, they couldn’t sleep and I could sense a fight coming. Even Ruby sat crying to me saying, ‘I don’t want anyone to love me ever, but you. Why are you even not married! Why don’t we have a normal life.’

So when all was heated and they were both in their own beds, glaring at ceilings and filled with frustration…ready to take it out on each other….I simply, got changed, put my coat on, walked into each of their rooms and said,

‘Put your coats and shoes on…’

‘What?’

‘Get up! Get coats and shoes on…we’re off out. We’re night owls. Let’s go have some fun, as a family, just us…together…right now.’

And you should have seen their faces. They beamed and dashed and scurried for shoes and giggled with madness.

Last night, when it felt (to them) like all the world was asleep, we enjoyed a late night park session. No one but us…love..and memories being made.

Last night, I had the HAPPIEST CHILDREN IN AL THE LAND. It meant so much to them. They felt loved. They felt excited. They showed loved. They showed excitement.

Under the night stars, as we slid down slides and raced around on merry go rounds….we felt free….

 

 

 

Love, Gin & Learning Things The Hard Way

I had gin last night, after watching the back of a bald man’s head for a while, during the afternoon, during a moment of ‘by myself’ chill. (I love a ‘by myself’ chill.) Not sure why I was so mesmerized by the back of his really bald head? I just like the way it folded and wiggled whenever I looked up, from Googling myself. 😉 Went well with a rhubarb gin and tonic…It sort of added humour and stability to a moderately emotional time. 🙂

Yesterday was both busy and chilled. I had an amazing time with Ruby & Junior, we played, we lunched, we loved. I knew that Junior had a great day, simply because whenever he does and I lay him to sleep at night, he always wraps himself around me, cuddles me in bed and whispers…

‘I love you mum. I love you so much.’

(I’ve trained him well. 😉  Hair toss, wink.)

Love matters to me. Love matters to me massively. It does to everyone, even when they don’t believe it does. It’s weird because i’m always confident when it comes to love and i’m really comfortable in my own glitzy skin….Yet, I crave love, but only the true kind, so when it comes along, I always want to treasure it and save it forever.

Some people see that as lame.  I see it as beautiful.

Gin was great last night. I managed to have chitters with my old school friend Kate who switched us to wine. Yet, the reason why it was all so great was because after such a great day, I really really thought about everything. I’m a passionate girl, but an expressive one and sometimes I don’t express as well I should. I get scared to, And no one should feel scared to express. It’s our life, we have one shot…and we’ve got to do it boldy.

So, I expressed yesterday evening, after a really great day, after a couple of good gin and tonics and really chilled times and the thing about my expression was that it was true, it was honest, it was loving, but most of all, it was Me. When it comes to ‘things’ or situations…and when something matters to you deeply, i always think that it’s really important that you’re able to just say how you feel and when you do, whether it’s been listened to or not (and usually if you’re honest, people DO listen) you feel liberated. I felt liberated and today as I woke up and look down at my phone everything felt like bliss. I felt like I had a best friend, who just gets it.

It made me really productive actually. I’m powered my humour, good times and true love. That’s where i get my energy from..and tequila. (Loved the West Hollywood Tequila dance that I used to do probably about 10 years ago now. Hate that I cried afterward because this dude named Ryan didn’t care about me. But loved that drag queen carried me home, like i was a Queen. Lol)

But yes, i’ve got a lot of things going on in work and it’s making me pretend that the little niggly things don’t matter. I don’t like the little niggly things. I leave them and they accumulate and then they terrify me because i’ve left myself a mountain to sort through. Like voicemails. I HATE going through my voicemails, unless they’re all ‘good news’ calls. My emails…this morning I had 79,329 to go through, that I had let accumulate. By noon, I had gone through them all…and now my inbox is chilling at 0. YEAH BABY! (This is why I’ve always said that I need to marry a really organised male, one that’s good at the niggly things. The things that demand organisation. Lol. The big things i can conquer with panache and glamourousity. I’m ace at the big things. I’ve been married three time and people always always message me asking me about my love life. The most common question from women, that I receive weekly is one that asks me if i would ever marry again. And GOD, ABSOLUTELY. But only if the guy was RIGHT! I’m not just gonna high kick gleefully down the isle to anyone. Lol. (I’ve done that before. 😉 )

I believe in love (i’m a sucker for it) and yeah, I’ve shared some interesting chapters, that didn’t quite fit. Yet it doesn’t EVER make me feel as though I couldn’t do it again. The great thing is, this time, i’ll get it right. I’m not someone who doesn’t KNOW what I want or what i’m looking or. That’s sexy in itself. I tend to learn the hard way, which to me, is always the BEST way. Nothing like a bit of good old raw experience. Beats the ‘Once Upon Time’ books.

(My good friend Inadequate Chris is just messaging. Remember weeks ago, before I did Ginos, i wrote a blog about his love life…well I was right. He has just waved ‘good bye’ to a 9 year relationship, that maybe wasn’t right anymore for both parties and well, it’s been tough, but he is happily moving forward. Y’see, to me, that 9 years was simply a young chapter and it’s what you do when you’re a grown up that makes impact, because as grown ups, we think wisely and know how to love properly. There’s a stability to us oldies. It great. It’s sexy. Nine years isn’t that long when you have a hopeful 100 years to do love in. Yes, we all hope to get it right the first time, but if you haven’t and in the past I haven’t….obviously….I’ve been hilarious and half of you have followed it through the decades. Do know that it’s right around the corner and that guy or that girl who makes you feel utterly COMPLETE…will find you and adore you…forever. )

But away from my preachy keeness, WUNNA LAND is WONDERFUL right now. I’m working hard, i’m making things happen, i’m feeling really lucky and really positive. All areas are fantastic. I even have to pinch myself to believe it’s true. It’s almost like a dysfunctional Cinderella Story. There’s a lot going on and yes, as always with work, i’m unable to wink it out there, until it’s time. However, it kinda feels like i’m BACK. (Well en route anyway, my Uber must have been delayed. 🙂 )

In sat in the Mallard in Doncaster blogging this…and two lesbians are talking about dildos infront of their children. Lol. I’m also looking at a picture of Jeremy Clarkson, because they have framed photos of people who grew up in Doncaster, who became stars…On and cycling is on the telly.

I’m off now to do a prosecco and buy hair.

FILL UP ON GOOD TIMES….

Love you,

Chrissie x