Hormones, Dull Folk & I Just Don’t Like Festivals

Image may contain: 1 person, shoes and outdoor

I’m feeling amazing today! I’m back on work mode and it feels good. It feels ‘OOoh Laaa.’ Yet, because i’m an old bird, I  was quite terribly knackered yesterday, after being blessed with  a really EARLY work wake up call. So, I just chilled and enjoyed family time, after a bit of picture taking and a rather important meeting. But I couldn’t keep my little kitten eyes open. I kept nodding off, like a granny, then shocking myself up. Lol. Only a Desperado could help me. 😉 (Any excuse, I know.!!! In case you DIDN’T KNOW A Desperado, is my favourite ‘slum it and chill’ go to drink.)

Yeeehah!

I’m in an updo today, and it’s great because it’s making me look like i’ve had botox.

(Snapchat Msg)

Chick friend: ‘You’ve properly stepped up your game Wunna! Your holiday pics and this whole Wunna Land blah, blah, is on fucking FIRE! You need a hose down.’

Me: ‘I’m getting there. I’m a long way off yet. But cheers, Baby boo. Hose down? Sounds rude. I think i’ll just have a 9am wine.’

Anyway, last night, I popped into a ‘Go Local’ in Ackworth to grab the Desperado and two ginger beers. (Love it there.) I’m craving ginger beers at the moment. And I  just love them because they remind me of my childhood. My dad and I would drink them and dance around to UB40 songs. A moment filled with love. 🙂 I get my drinking habits and my creative talent from my Pops. I don’t think he had a ginger beer though? His moves were too good. 🙂

Walked in. Saw the back of a guy, who looked moderately attractive. I only saw his back and his gym bum. But he had a Essex accent and was bantering out loud to the two middle aged ladies behind the counter. When he left, I slowly walked up an isle with a smile on my face…

Me: ‘Look at the state of you two! You’re beaming! Calm yourselves down! Hahaha!’

Lady: ‘Here you! Lol.  Just because we’re old doesn’t mean we can’t see a good thing, when it’s in front of us!’

Me: ‘You look love struck. Lol. I’ve never seen you so happy!’

Lady: ‘He’s moving down here….’

Me: ‘What? With his beautiful wife & kids? Haha.’

Lady: ‘Well SHE (points at the other cashier) definitely knows how to pull’em. She was stood there, chatting to the hottie, eating a bloody Shepherds pie! Hahaha!’

Me: ‘HAHAHAH. You couldn’t even BE any more northern if you tried.’

I mean, what is life without a bit of gravy on ya face, eh!

Anyway, the reason why i wanted to blog about that moment, was simply because it made my heart warm. It was so innocent and flirty and showed me that no matter how old, how young, sassy, quiet, how rich, poor, small or tall….a lady is..? She STILL always has that giggly little ‘playground’ girl inside of her… when it comes to boys.

It was such a cute moment. Glad, I destroyed it with by sick witty banter…and a ginger beer in my hand. 😉

Then I checked through the magazines,and papers, to see who had made all the covers.

Anyway, everything’s great! I’m really busy. The kids are back at school and i’m gonna miss having them around me all the time.

Being a ‘lone parent’ and raising them by myself, and having to work SO hard to give them a great great life, has always meant that I haven’t really ever had the option of just chilling. Y’know, what I mean, I never could just stay at home with them, mummy them, make teas, etc etc…. I never even managed to do that when I was wife…and that was ANY of the times, I was a wife. Lol. My life has just never given me that apple to munch on…However, it’s been wonderful.

I managed it all with happiness and I managed to be a NORMAL mum over their Easter holidays from school…(Well as normal as Wunna Land gets, because I did audition a lot and then fly to Spain and do days and days of pap shots.)  Bottom line, I love being with them and the cheeky little ‘Coconuts’ (which is what I call them) love it MADLY.

I sort of fantasize about times like that. I’m gonna miss them heading back to school…for about an hour. 😉 I’ll just swish back into work mode then and probably do it in stilettos.

I’m trying to tell you what’s going on work wise right now, but I because there’s just so so much, going on.  I have auditions zooming out my ear holes, a bunch of modeling gigs, i’ve had to turn down another trip to Spain, due to being ‘booked out,’ and turn down a show, because I didn’t think It was the right fit for me. It’s not something that I thought i’d enjoy….and I didn’t think i’d make much impact on a show of that sort. Well…no, i’d make impact, but not benefit from it AND…It involved a lot more of Wunna land than just me.

So I just said no.

But regardless, I’m back on the telly shortly (I again, can’t tell you anything about it yet) and I’m unfortunately eating everything in sight….when i’m meant to be on a Herbalife plan.

I’m blaming it on the ‘You only life once’ line, because I have to blame it on something, right? But if i’m honest, I kinda feel sexy anyway, whether I have a shake OR a burger in my hand…and I think that’s what confidence and VA VOOM IS!

Shaking‘ was and IS great because it kinda made me realize that I’m happy anyway…. Plus, I did lose weight for my Spanish snaps, which helped me out tremendously. So, I’ll be back ‘shaking’ shortly. yet because my schedule is about to get tighter and when you’re on the go, it’s absolutely brilliant.

No Faff. Easy Going. Just the way I like things.

I think i might have a wine to celebrate!

I also think, it must nearly be my ‘time of the month’ soon, because I’m going through THAT week, where in which EVERYTHING annoys me. Lol. (You’ll only get it, if you’re a girl.) People are really annoying me right now and i’m being much sharper, much sassier…much more uncensored. 🙂 I seem to have put down my ‘rosie tinteds’ for a decent set of RAGING hormones.

I’m quite ‘tell it how it is‘ ..of course with charm…by nature. If people can’t take a bit of banter or the odd home truth, then they’re not yet comfy in their own skin. Right now, i’m finding everyone quite…….What’s the word??

Dull?

I keep reading people’s posts and listening to conversations and thinking…

WHY BE SO DULLSVILLE? WAKE UP. ENJOY LIFE.

And the thing about ‘The Dull’ ones, is that they’re ALWAYS the first humans, to get their slow moving, ‘JUDGEY *never pointed at fun* FINGERS‘ out…. They’re all..

‘I’m too good for this./I’m too good for that./I would never this…I cannot believe that…/I am the most boring, unexciting human in the entire flipping land. Let’s buy tins of magnolia paint and just watch it dry upon already magnolia walls.’

Lighten up. Chill out. You don’t have to be wild. You just have to switch the beige mindset, for a better one that’s swirled in LIFE, COLOUR…OR EVEN JUST RUM?

YOU BORING SODS. (Can you tell i’m hormonal? Lol)

I love being a girl. We’re bonkers. Staying sane, is our official life goal.

My news feed got so frustrating that I started looking at all the ‘festival fever because it’s everywhere, isn’t it. It’s all gone ‘Coachella mad!

Now, Coachella.. at least looks fun. It looks sunny and alive.  I just NOT a BRITISH festival kinda girl. I’m not one to want to camp in a tent, wee in a plastic cup and refrain from showering for days… in the name of anything. I’m a glamour puss. And i’m not really bothered about having Unicorn hair, rainbow glitter on my face and adorning my arm with endless wristbands, that aren’t made of diamonds. 🙂

I’m a kitten, who enjoys a ‘cocktail and a wink,‘ and yes I can slum it. I love to chill more than anything. I mean, chilling is my favourite thing. If you have ever dated me, ever…you will know that about me.

I’m too old to ‘festival’ or camp about.

I mean, Glamping in the forest , in my giant mansion of a cabin was about as far as my camping skills go…and even that had to include a massage, a hot tub, room service and the option of an ‘in house’ chef. 😉

My chick friend even once stated that..

‘Camping to Chrissie, is like staying in the worst room in some Five Star Hotel.’

I love that! I’m not a dick. I just don’t like things to be a struggle during my down time. I work really hard, even though it may not look that way. I work really REALLY hard. ALL THE TIME. My work ethic is incredible. I’m fun but i’m professional and most successful people are, I reckon? I simply play it like it’s all a jiggle and a winkl…because that’s what my job needs to look like…

I just prefer calm, easy going peace, or quiet luxury…that comes ready made with love..Festivals are a Wunna Land ‘no go.’ None of this waiting in line for a shower… in a tented field, filled with ‘drama’ boys, and girls with Unicorn hair because i’ve  paid extra pences and booked ‘Vanity.’

I’ll pass…

So, yeah, I enjoy fun. But a festival is just not my cuppa…gin.

I don’t have anything else to say….I’m off to meet ‘Big A’ from ‘House of Solo’ Mag later I think….

I haven’t caught up with him in ages….

 

 

 

 

Girls Nights, Cocktails & A Random Brave Message..

Image may contain: 1 person

Morning!!! So sorry, I couldn’t whizzle out a little bit of ‘diary’ yesterday. I don’t know what happened?  I just decided to  surrender to ‘knackeredness’ after the weekend. I felt tired and hungover and both my babies are currently off school, so I found myself having to slide through tunnels in the sunshine, whilst having a picnic. Even though that sounds delightful to some….the park is NOT a place to be hungover. Bottom line…Ruby & Junior LOVED it and I guess, when it comes to life and parenting…that’s all that matters.

I now, NEVER blog when I’m shattered, as my story always lacks the essential ‘gusto.’ And I also try to refrain from blogging when drunk (these days)…as like tipsy texting…the blog is very rarely written by me and often should be credited to vodka. (Yet, I do adore a Wunna drunk blog. The last one ended in me being sick.) 

Okay, so Saturday evening, I worked, I mummied and with a *wink* and a *shimmie,* I managed to FIT INTO my ‘diet dress‘ deliciously designed by The Kardashians, glam up, damn up and venture over to The Electric Theatre for ‘Fairytales’ 30th birthday. (I don’t do weight loss via scales and tape measures…I do it via goal dresses.)

Right, I haven’t seen all the girls, apart from ‘Firmonnell’ (who is my chick best friend,) in a really long while. My life tinkered me in a completely different direction….a far less bumpy road, filled with magic and selfie taking 😉 . Work & passion took my hand, things got busy, dreams came true and I sort of had to look behind me and *wave* them off, as I focused, on doing me, happiness and everything i’ve always wanted to.

(I told you, this is the chapter of my life, where I am being a shit friend…down to work.)

So, regardless, it was really good to bump into everyone, even though we couldn’t really ‘catch up.’ We dedicated the night to ‘Fairytale,’ who looked divine, tipsy and not even nearly 30! And we were there to make sure she knew that we adored her….via booze.

I was there first, even though the girls has NAGGED ME to make sure I turned up. I sent them a snapchat, after seeing they still had rollers in their hair and a boozy ‘ring of fire’ going on around a dining table. Lol.

‘You dicks. Don’t rush me here, when you’re not even fucking ready, let alone nearly HERE! Hustle’s still got rollers in! You’re shit friends. I’m here first. Lol’

They arrived…Pissed…and began hugging ans lip smooching me.

Firmonnell: ‘I feel really discombobulated from you right now!’

Me: ‘I feel like I have so much to say, but I can’t say it. I think it’s shocked my system being around everyone.’

(It was sort of like going back in time….glamourously, of course. We’re ‘dress up’ gals by nature, so we don’t like to look shit. There was one on the stage, one at the bar, two on the sofa and one squatted outside by a barrel and a play area with her hands over her mouth in shock. Lol But we all still looked fabulous.) 

WE DON’T PLAY.

I got to chitter with Mel, eye talk with ‘Firmonnell,’ have a dance with ‘Hustle Barbie’ and private convo with ‘Double B.’ (Who still fucking cracks me up.)

What I DID notice is how much my life has actually changed. I didn’t really notice until that night. Lol. I also realized that even though I don’t miss that part of 2017 at all, I do value my individual relationships with them. I prefer meeting them individually. I’ve actually met ‘Firmonnell’ a lot. We actually each have really different relationships with each other.

I also noticed that since my merry absence….they’ve all got skinnier and they’ve all got naughtier…

I absolutely LOVE IT.

These girls are  living FOR THEM, right now and nothing makes me *sizzle* more!

LIFE IS ABOUT CELEBRATING YOU, YOUR CHOICES, OWNING YOUR PATH AND GETTING HAPPY.

People waste so much time ‘thumb twiddling’ and being concerned over what others think. These girls are hilarious. The amount of times I heard…

‘I can do what I want’

…almost made my spine tingle. Lol. I’m a ‘do what I want’ kinda kitten. That’s why we adore each other.  I love listening to all their drama. It’s my favourite. And they’d listen to mine, all day, every day! But, right now….my life just seems so easy and peaceful.

Their drama trumps mine ‘errday.’

There was a moment when ‘Hustle’ (who looked beautiful) was perched on the edge of the sofa, that I was sat on, wondering whether the drink, she was drinking, was hers and said…

‘So, how IS everything you? What’s going on?’

And I didn’t know what to say….? And I don’t know why I didn’t know what to say? I just didn’t? Everything’s kinda really great right now and i think I daren’t say it out loud, in case ‘The Gods’ hear and fuck me over.

I’m doing what I love….and it’s accidentally going really well. I think, I’m still safe with that.

I didn’t really do much that night, I just chilled and chatted, because i’d rolled off a hectic week. I ‘caught up’ and stood with wine….But it was great to see everyone, and celebrate ‘Fairytale’ turning 30.

I have some great chick friends. I’m lucky. We make our own choices…Laugh about them. Cry about them…But value each others ways…

Then Sunday morning…

I woke up….

I rolled over in my sheets, grabbed my phone and scrolled through my emails. (I love naked, bed sheeted, kitten rolls, in the morning…as it means, if you have time to do them…. you’re not in a rush…)

Found a random one with ‘Noticed you at Electric Theatre ..Proposal’ as the subject title….

So, I clicked on it…and it read…

‘Chrissie

Tonight I noticed you at the electric theatre on a number of occasions at the birthday party.

I crossed eyes with you at the bar, while I was on a break between sets with the band – hope you had a good night out?

Little did I realize until now, that I was looking at a model/blogger from round the corner.

Your blogs are a really good read at first glance …….it says in your blogs that you believe in love at first sight ……well…….?

As they say in Yorkshire , if ya don’t ask ya don’t get…….so I’d be intrigued to know if you noticed me or just wondered why the hell was a guy staring at you…..but I guess you are used to that when you stand out like a sore thumb!

X’

Now, I’ll be honest…and say that I don’t really recall ‘catching eyes’ at the bar, with anyone? All I remember at the bar, where the girls going on about ‘shots per text.’ But I do remember, looking at one of the guys who played in the band, whilst I was on the dance floor, because I was sure that I knew him from somewhere, but couldn’t figure out where?

However, I do love that you sent me that message, as that took a great deal of Goolies….and it’s romantic, it’s sweet. Now, I don’t know whether you read the blog or not? But if you are reading this today…whizz me another email…and we can absolutely go for a drink…  a ‘friendly’ as I like to call them. That took loads of balls, and probably a few drinks…and even though I can’t remember the moment…I do actually appreciate your message.

Then as all girls do….the ‘morning after’ group ‘Whatsapp’ was going mental.

First Mel thanked ‘Fairytale’ for inviting her…After moderately bollocking me for ‘sloping off’ without saying bye. ( I love sloping off.) We all told ‘Fairytale’ how great she was and hoped she had a lovely time….Then I plonked in the above email….

…and it all went down hill from there?

‘Who was that?’

Me: ‘I don’t know? I fell in love and didn’t even realise?’

Hustle: ‘I can actually remember most of my night for a change.’

(I had stated that night, that it hasn’t started until ‘Hustle’ has skidded across the floor on her arse.) 

‘It was good. I have no beer fear! Lol’

Fairytale: ‘I’m sweating worse than an otters pocket.. and I can’t stop thinking about your bum hole Chrissie.’

Hustle: ‘Chrissie’s bum hole? What did I miss?’

Me: ‘Was I not in the same place as everyone last night? I don’t remember falling in love or my bum hole?’

Fairytale: ‘I’ll say one word…Jonny.’

(Jonny is Fairytale’s boyfriend.) 

Me: ‘Jonny, did me up the bum? This just gets worse…’

Double B: ‘Hahaha, I honestly have no idea what’s going on here?’

Fairytale: ‘Jonny pinched my phone…Lol’

Me: ‘It’s too early for this shit…What is going on???’

Then I got saved, because as soon as I placed my phone down on my bed side table, it *pinged* again….

(Whatsapp…Other friends….)

Kate: ‘SO!!! No date happened last night. Lol. BUT I ended up having a date with a different guy in the end by accident!!

Me: ‘Omg! As If. I need to know everything…’

Kate: ‘Lol…What you up too? Meet you at The Carelton in 10…?

Challenges, Balls & Busy Times

Image may contain: 1 person, smiling, standing

Happy Frinally! How you all doing? I’m utterly rushed off my feet. It’s busy, but it’s all good. I’m feeling grateful for the Wunna Land *buzz* and even though it’s completely what I asked for Lol….I’m not gonna lie and say it’s not hard work.

Hard work pays off…

(And all that…;) )

I have a lot going on. I’m excited to cook with Kwoklyn Wan next month, and to also film the advert for my blog next week. I’m looking forward to celebrate friends birthdays and pick up my new whip. I’m scheduling and rescheduling and i’m trying to get it all sorted. There’s not enough hours in the day, nor is there days in a week.

But it’s exciting times..

I’m lucky. I don’t have it bad.

(And to everyone who has started a blog, a vlog, a social account or whatever it is, that you’ve chosen to ‘Boom,’ DO KNOW, that it takes utter dedication and work. It’s a FULL TIME job…that may not be rewarding at first..Yet once it bursts it’s ridiculously amazing. Like with anything, stick at it. It depends on how much you want it to work, I guess. If you ‘half ass’ it, you’ll get ‘half ass’ results. Which is better than nothing…Yet, with it being so competitive, there are people who aren’t ‘half arsing’ it…with their jobs, their kids, their everything in between and they’re the names that are smashing it or going to smash it in the future.

Preach over. I’m just being real. I get asked about it all the time.

I shot this morning, I also did DAY 2 of my Herbalife challenge (for all of you asking me about that also, do know that you can inbox me at any time and I’ll send you the details.)

Also, i’m getting a lot of emails for ‘meet and greets.’  I’m excited to ‘meet and greet’ with you.  BUTYou do need to make sure you email : info@thecelebritymanagement.com They will get it sorted for you and i’ll hopefully see you soon.

Plus, thank you for all the love i’m getting for, what i’m calling…‘my nipple pics.’ Lol. My nips appreciate the love? I don’t know what to say? If you subscribed to my Only Fans Account (onlyfans.com.chrissiewunna) you would’ve actually seen those pics…and a bit more…at the beginning of the week. Lol (They get exclusive content.)

Right, i’ve got all the blurb out the way! 🙂 I feel like I wrote that in one quick breath.

I have a busy weekend. Which reminds me i need to reschedule something. Ugh. I hate rescheduling, but sometimes, you just have to! 🙁

Mother’s Day is approaching, which a day that means so much to me. I was actually meant to ‘influence’ a brand for Mothers Day but I didn’t have the time to fit it in, which was hard on me, because it’s a brand that I adore.

However, I’m looking forward to both spending time with my own ‘Mama,’ and with Ruby and Junior. (I’ve emailed both Dads today, to do a ‘Day Switch’ with me, as they usually do ‘Sunday with the Babies.’ BUT, both have them have ignored my message. Lol.

WHICH IS ANNOYING.

Co parenting is bliss, but difficult at times.

But the kids are happy…and that makes me smile. (It’s World Book day’ today at their school and Junior actually thought i was pranking him and making him go to school in fancy dress, just for kicks. Lol. As if!!)

Junior: ‘If no one else is dressed up MUM. I’m gonna be SO UPSET AT YOU’

Me: ‘What Ruby’s *Little Red Riding Hood.*’

Junior: ‘That doesn’t count. She’s weird anyway.’

Me: ‘Show me ya pecs.’

(He went as Superman and it’s ace because it has padded pecs and muscles in. LOL. DYING.)

Talking about death…Ruby laid on m bed last night and asked me about the above. She’s recently had two great grandparents pass away and it’s weirdly stuck. It’s in her head constantly.

‘I don’t want you to die. When will I die. I don’t want…’

‘Don’t focus on people dying. Focus on having the best time ever, whilst you can baby. That’s what living is all about.’

I kissed her and she went to bed.

(Awww. I hate that it’s stuck in her head.) 

I’m currently hiding (yes because i’m creepy.) I needed a quiet moment, so i’ve come to a quiet place to secretly blog. You know when you just fancy some ‘you’ time…away from the ‘la dee daa.’ I love quiet chill moments by myself. I guess, when you have a really ‘social’ career…You treasure these moments.

I love them.

I get what Ronnie (one of my LA besties, who came to visit me in London recently) meant now. He’s a celebrity chef out there and well he said, whilst we were drinking in his suite, (well I was, he was ill) that he always posted a week afterward, simply because he didn’t want anyone to know where he exactly was.

Crazy innt.

But I get it now. Lol.

(I remember getting really drunk that night and dancing around a pretend executive suite cage. Ronnie’s gay by the way. Anyway, It ended up being such a hilarious evening. I love memories.)

Loads of people are messaging me telling me that I don’t need to do my 30 Day Challenge. I don’t wanna hear that. I’ve chosen to do it. So I’m doing it. What I need is support. Lol. So grab ya Wunna Flags and start telling me to smash it. I’m not defeatist by any mean. But, I just need to hear champion talk. Lol. You don’t have to do it. But I really want to. So yes, from now…

CHAMPION TALK, Please!

(It’s actually making me feel really good.)

I have also noticed that a bunch of my guy friends are haring on about how they don’t get an ‘International Mens day.’ Lol. Stop being babies…You wouldn’t do anything on it anyway. 🙂 Then I saw  react so incredibly to ‘Steak & Blow Job’ day with with March 14th. I’ve never seen so many excited posts. It’s not until Wednesday. So you just need to calm down.

I’m sure lots of you will get you steak and have us …*fill in the blank.* Lol. 

I do actually think you deserve a day, because it’s not that easy being a dude. So that can be your day to embrace.

Hope you all get blowys and red meat. Lol

ANYWAY…

Right now in life, i’m busy, but i’m feeling happy and free. I’m feeling liberated and finally like i’m getting somewhere. I had to make a switch, which took a lot of balls, but I did it and I haven’t looked back.

Don’t be scared to do the things that make you happy, because if you are, you’ll never feel fulfilled….

Kisses,

Thank you for following my life!

See you on my ‘Socials.’

 

 

 

 

Just a Quickie, Herbalife & New Agents

Image may contain: 1 person, smiling Image may contain: 1 person

Hiya! This morning I put down my morning mimosa and made the executive decision to make my first ever Herbalife shake.

(I know!! Hell hasn’t frozen over, I’m just wanting to get back to ‘ooh laa.’ I’m body confident. I’m not gonna make like i’m not. Yet, at 37, and two babies later, there are wibbly bits to me, that I don’t really like to ‘wibble.’It’s not hot or empowering to me, when I’m about to ‘get jiggy’ and bits of me are wibbly.  I’m sensual by nature…and I don’t want niggle body bits to adjust my sexy flow. 😉 I do have moments when I strip down, throw on a bikini and think, ‘it’s a one piece kinda day.’ And being a girl, I just don’t like that feeling, no girl does. So, like I said in an earlier post, I was looking for something to get me into incredible shape…)

I was on instagram and I saw a selfie….A hot one…One that made me want to kitty *pounce* at and make non stop loving toooo! Lol. Anyway, they’d been using the Herbalife products. So, after a think and a look in the mirror, I committed to it with love…and today has been my first day of the Herbalife 30 Day Challenge.

This is my ‘before’ pic….

Image may contain: 1 person

I’ll post the exact same ‘hopefully new body version’ of this pic in 30 days times.

I’m looking for support on this challenge. Lol. I’ve been inundated with messages from people saying ‘You already look amazing.’ I really appreciate that. I do. I just want to see if I can try and get the body I want…Everyone has different goals…So, in my head, I have a picture of what i’d like my body to look like.

I’m excited. Who knew could actually make a shake. (And it was actually the best shake i’d ever had.)

Image may contain: 1 person, smiling

But I’m doing it…Two shakes and a healthy meal. Wish me luck. I’m also getting DM’s from people wanting to do it also. Just send me an email or message me on one of my ‘socials’ and you can shimmie along with me. (I’ve already roped my friend Kate into it because we all kinda need a buddy to ‘shake’ with.)

Today, I also signed to new management.

I know! Crazy times.

 

Image may contain: one or more people and text Image may contain: 2 people, people sitting and text

I’m now signed to CMC..and i’m really excited.

I started two new journies today in one.

Image may contain: text

Everything’s just gone crazy. I’m really busy. I’m loving life. And to be honest, (I know i’m usually sassy) but I couldn’t be more grateful.

I say it all the time, but i’ll say it again and again…

I feel like the luckiest girl in the entire world.

Away from all that, I’ve had a conversation about what my life would be like if i lived in a caravan.

Chick friend: ‘Would we drink out of caravan cups and shit?’

Me: ‘No cupped hands. Obviously.’

Chick friend: ‘If I come over to yours and you don’t live in a caravan, I’m going to be really disappointed now.’

Then my other chick friend ‘Daisy’ and I decided that ‘tight’ people were unattractive. The art of generosity is sexy. We’ve decided this because it’s thoughtful…and because we’re princesses. Lol. (Mainly because we’re princesses. Am I too old to be a ‘princess’ now? )

Daisy: ‘Thought you were a Diva?’

Me: ‘Yeah, I’m only a Princess when you put the word *Mother Fucking* infront of it. Otherwise i’m a Queen.’

I also think that everyone’s horny right now. My inbox has filled up with the weirdest men, with the weirdest approaches to Wunna Land. There must be something in the air. I suggest cold showers and a moment away from your socials….OR some precious ‘self’ time. Lol. I don’t know why they think, i’m going to read a Facebook DM from someone i don’t know at all and then all of a sudden delight them with the pornographic version of me.

‘Hellllo. Yes sir. Absolutely. Here’s a picture of me in the buff…’

It’s not happening…

I don’t mind if you go Google a few pics or scroll through my ‘socials. By all means ‘pleasure’ away. That’s what it there for. Lol. I’ all for it. I just don’t want to talk to you about it….especially when I don’t at all know you. It’s bizarre. It’s creepy. Don’t do it.

I’ve got sassy now, haven’t I?

(Backstreet Boys is playing in the Background…. and a women who likes Tenerife is sat infront of me.)

I don’t actually have anything else to say…My minds gone blank.

Daisy: ‘Because you’ve not had a wine. Why don’t you tell everyone that you come with a tattoo of an exes name on you. Lol.’

Hahaha…Why do I have shit friends? I’m sure, right now, I could just find better ones. 🙂

Right I’m off.

Just a quickie for you,

Love you,

Thank you for following my life..

It’s a really busy time and I’m enjoying it.

Chrissie

Image may contain: 5 people

 

Being ‘Filthy,’ Diva Strops & Pity Parties ;)

Image may contain: 1 person, smiling

How many days has it been? I don’t even know? It’s felt like forever…(let me just check…)

No, it’s fine. Monday was my last post. We’re all good. Well, I assume it was Monday, since it starts ‘Happy Monday,’ but let’s face it, you never know with me.

SO MUCH IS GOING ON…IT IS SUCH A BUSY TIME FOR ME.

I did throw a pity party yesterday. I did well and took it out on my best chick ‘Firmonnell.’

Yippppee!

‘It’s your job now.’

‘I know but…I’m throwing a pity party, just go with it… I feel like a thing and not a human…’

‘You ARE human, in fact you’re the best human I know.’

(I can’t stop adoring ‘Firmonnell.’ She’s someone that no matter what’s going on in her life, she’ll always make you feel better. I’m a bit like that…Yet only she notices it.)

Then I threw a moderate ‘almost’ strop on whatsapp last night, (i’m a feisty one and I like that about me,)  but I felt it in my soul and then swallowed my glitzy pride. I chilled on it a second, with my non diet wine..and even though I wanted to EXPLODE….I 37 year old stopped myself. 🙂

This morning I looked down at my phone and read…

‘How’s the diva doing today?x’

‘I nearly went ‘drag queen’ ape on you..’

‘U little shit…What are u doing?’

I’ve committed to both labels...’diva’ and ‘shit’ ..so yeah, just like that…. I’m altogether fine now.

Honest…

(They say ‘i’m fine’ is the biggest lie all humans tell every single minute of every single day. I could’ve just made that up…) 

I’ve just been asked to fly to Paris, but I can’t go because my work load is intense. I’m about to start my health kick and i’m not going to find the ‘health kick’ part hard…I’m doing to find the ‘dealing with the life stress’ bit hard…and i’m gonna miss my giant cocktail slurps.

I had so much to tell you, but i have no clue where to start or what to say now, which isn’t very handy when you’re a blogger.

I’ve danced in my undies in fitting rooms. (I stated on Facebook that I wanted to see your fitting room frolics. I did mean the girls, and all in the aid of empowerment. But only boys responded… Lol….At least I didn’t get any dick pics. I actually and quite thankfully haven’t received any in ages…THAT DOESN’T MEAN I WANT ANY. Here’s a wacky concept, save them for your wives!

(All I can currently smell around me is roast dinners. Stop eating roast dinners around me. I’m about to start my diet. The middle aged lady at the opposite table needs to watch herself because I might eat HER and her dinner.)

But where was I? I danced in fitting rooms. (GIRLS SEND ME YOUR ‘FITTING ROOM’ SELFIES.) I’ve worked, worked, worked, worked and worked. I had to wake up at 3am this morning to ‘online post’ stuff, to hit the time zones. (See! Told you the graft was that easy.) I forgot to schedule a post…So I had to do it manually..I shocked myself up at 2.30am and remembered. I also blind hand patted around in the dark for wine, but couldn’t find any. I’m that much of a loser.

Ruby and I had ‘mummy night’ last night, (Junior was at Keiran’s, his Dad,) so she slept in my bed and does every Mummy night,’ as ofcourse, as always….there’s just me in it.

She must’ve been having the weirdest 2.30am dream, because still asleep she burst into a fit of mad laughter and then shouted…

‘I HAVEN’T WEE’D MYSELF.’

Lord help me through BOTH OF THEIR teenage years. Rubes is like me, so she’s ll be fun, but fine. She’ll just cry over boys all the time. Junior is such a lad, which will be a nightmare. He is the product of two ‘wild ones.’ Only last weekend, the WONDERFUL security at The Frenchgate Centre, in Doncaster, prevented him from trying to wander off and do his own thing. They had to drag him back to Waterstones…because he was sure there was something more exciting happening around the corner.

Keiran might be a Jehovah’s Witness now, yet when I met him YEARS AND YEARS AGO, he was certainly an Ibiza party boy. (He’ll hate me putting that…But whatever…It’s the truth. 🙂 And there’s no shame in anyone’s game of story. I ain’t hating on you boy! We’re co parent an awesome son.) 

But anyway…There I was on March 7th, 2018…2.30am in the morning…in Yorkshire…

I sat up, naked, in the dark, with ‘Rocco’ my kitten and I posted this…

Image may contain: 1 person, smiling

Image may contain: 4 people, people smiling

Image may contain: 1 person, smiling Image may contain: 1 person, smiling

Nothing is better to ME than ‘FILTHY SENTIMENTS.’ You should all know this, as I harp on about them all the time. I love how open, naughty, outspoken and fun the brand is! (With a classy twist. Like this isn’t some ‘run of the mill‘ cheapo brand. It’s so styled, so well run and each piece of ‘filth‘ is absolutely divine.)

Anyway, incase you didn’t know…I am now the PROUD OWNER of my very own bespoke ‘Filthy Sentiments’ mug…from their new neon range…

AND I F****** LOVE IT.

Yesterday, ‘Filthy Sentiments’ turned over their FIRST MILLION in sales. They’ve only been in business 3 years…and that IS HUGE, to say they specialize in ‘filthy’ gift cards, mugs, note books, pens and now pj’s. That’s not easy!

So, here I am celebrating with ‘Filthy’ because, if anything I want you to be inspired. That took a great deal of hard work. And with fun brands people don’t think that ‘hard work’ happens, because they just see the ‘fun.’

Someone somewhere, came up with an idea, probably over a drink and BOOM….a million pound later…it worked….and it’s only just the beginning.

That is what I’m celebrating!

(And I loved it because on my Insta & Facebook post this morning, I could swear like a pirate on my post.)

FILTHYSENTIMENTS.CO.UK

Get you bit of FILTH NOW!

OH NO…THE PLACE WHERE I’M BLOGGING IS NOW PLAYING SAD LOVE SONGS…I’m too emosh. It’s reminding me of ‘Dancing on Ice.’

Right now, I have a friend away filming a reality show. Lisa (as in Appleton) was also just on Jeremy Kyle with Lauren Harries this morning. My new school/old school diet and work out matey ‘Kate’ reminded me this morning. I missed it. But i’ll see it on catch up.

I love it when Lisa gets feisty.

All girls are hot when they’re feisty.

It’s important that you always stand up for what you believe is right, even when you might be moderately terrified to do so. Make sure, you’re being treated the way you want to be treated. Make sure, you are always staying LOYAL to what you believe in.

The people that give a shit, will stand by you, understand you and love you madly anyway…

Thank you for following my life…

Chrissie,

Image may contain: 1 person, smiling

 

 

 

 

Fridays, Sex & Watermelon Ice Creams…

Image may contain: 1 person, close-up

Morning! Happy Happy Friday! How ya doing? I posted this picture on my ‘socials’ this morning and it’s caused my inbox to go *bonkers.* I’m not sure why everyone’s so excited? However thank you for the *hearts/likes* and everything inbetween, that i’ve received so far. I appreciate it, as it really does help when you’re trying to build some kind of blogging look at me empire..and I’ll always tell you that i’m grateful, because I’m not daft enough to think that I could do it without your attention.

I actually also got called ‘SO Incredibly DUMB’ by a Lady in Scotland, because I captioned the pic with a..

‘Does this count as my Five a Day?’

Lol. (I found it wedged between the love)

In my defense….I am aware that I’m holding an ICE CREAM and not a piece of fruit. Just in case you didn’t know that?  🙂

*ROLLS EYES.*

AND just because I served my selfie up with boobies, doesn’t mean my brain doesn’t actually work. In fact, quite the contrary… It worked an absolute TREAT for six o clock in the morning and completely sober.

Yipppppppppeeee!

However, I understand that it *rubbed* you up the wrong way… I get it, I mean, what could be more annoying than seeing me in a bikini top and a watermelon ice cream lolly, pining for ‘likes’ as soon as you wake up.

BUT JEEZE. LIGHTEN UP! IT’S FLIPPING FRIDAY! Stop being a Snooze Festival! It’s my JOB!

(A polite way of saying ‘Get lost.’ :)) 

You wore the floral blouse work. I wore the watermelon ice cream…It’s cool. Lol. We can all play nicely together, sing nursery rhymes and hold hands around Cyberland.

Glad we swept that under the glitzy bar table.

I’ve got a ton of phone calls to make today. A ton. Everything’s really busy and tomorrow it’s my gorgeous little girl’s BIRTHDAY, so alongside work, I’m planning her day of delight…as she turns SEVEN!!! I couldn’t be more excited. Family means everything to me. We’ll be headed to Sundown Adventure Land in the morning…and HOPEFULLY IT WON’T BE FLIPPING FREEZING, because the kids are gonna force me to ‘water ride’ this, ‘kiddie rollercoaster’ that….and every inch of me will be a ‘shiver.’

(The thought of it alone, has given me a runny nose.)

But yes, lots of work. Loving it. Very lucky. (I’m also trying to get back into shape, as I have shoot galore. Probably should’ve listened to the Scottish chick and not had an ice cream for breakfast.) 

I had ace banter with my chick friend last night, in regards to sex and how I guess all women do actually need it. As you sail into your 30’s you kinda enjoy a bit of ‘ooh laa,’ a great deal more than you ever did in your 20’s. I don’t know what happens?

I’m naturally sensual anyway and I never apologize for that. And I couldn’t be with anyone that I didn’t have great ‘bedroom’ chemistry with….as I couldn’t live with a lifetime of really shit sex. It’s an important part to a relationship and or even a marriage. The rest of the ‘happily ever after’ just seems to happen naturally. (In most cases. Lol)

Then this morning another chick friend of mine…

(Sorry, I’m just looking out my window because I have an 11am meeting to get to with ‘Big A’ from ‘House of Solo’ Magazine and someones BLOCKED MY CAR IN….)

Anyway, one of my chicks friends is off on a Tinder Date. (I hate Tinder. But I do love that ages ago, a bunch of my guys friends had ‘liked’ so many chicks on it, that a message popped up on their phones stating that there were literally NO MORE CHICKS left for them to like.. in their area. They had ‘OUT LIKED’ Tinder itself.One of them was Nick…Who is back on Take Me Out tomorrow night…because he was one of the best boys to ever be on the show. Don’t forget to watch him.) 

But yes, one of my chick friends, who shall remain nameless, is off on a Tinder Date shortly and before this date she had to check in with me this morning to decipher if he was someone I actually knew, or just a ‘Wunna Superfan?’ ( I think he was on one of my friends lists? I don’t know. I have no clue who he is? Lol. If you have my Snapchat, or Insta you’ll know what she said… I can’t repeat it.. But it ended with…

Chick: ‘If he asked me to dress up as you, i’m leaving.’

She’s hilarious! I love her. She also quenched my ego and you’ve got to love that, as I’m certainly a big headed swine. I like to play like i’m humble at times, Lol…But I do now think, i’m quite an ego maniac. It’s disgraceful.

I love how weird dates can make you feel right? I always get nervous…I hope they fall madly in love….

Right, this is short but sweet, as I’ve got a lot of work to get through and a meeting to be at in 30 minutes.

 

Love you lots.

Thank you for following my life.

Chrissie x

See you on on ‘Socials.’ 😉

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Overnight Success, Carbs & Dwarves

Image may contain: 1 person, standing and outdoor

Two little, happy twin dwarf men, have been popping into my dreams for the past 3 nights in a row! (Don’t even ask. My mind is beyond any form of normality.)  They’re just happy as can be, chilling in my dream land….these two twin dwarves.

It worried me and made me eat a ton of carbs for safety. I stuffed everything into the most ‘macca’ sandwich you could imagine, that was filled with everything in the foodie world, that could possibly make the ‘Mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm…’ list.

You would’ve burst into a euphoric sense of ‘NOM NOM.’ I even stopped being ‘Veggie’ for it. 🙂 Or maybe that was the time I had pork scratchings?

On the whole, I’m having a lovely time. I’ve worked a great deal and been quite the ‘social’ queen, that I took the last couple days off away from picture taking and all the rest of the work…just to enjoy some family time with Ruby & Junior. I really cherish that and I used to blog & post about them, a lot more than I do now.

Not because ‘I don’t care’ and only care about ‘selfie taking..’ yet because that part of my life is so special to me…I keep it just for me, because it’s real. I treasure it. There’s a lot of things, that I keep just for me, now.

But back to the Twinny Dwarf Men. (Sounds like kinky a fetish.)

I eventually came to my senses and Googled the SHIT out of what this could possibly mean...??? (My Google History is the MOST BIZARRE sighting!)

Luckily, the omen is good. It apparently means that i’m quite possibly charmed, that i’ll rise to the top in life and be swirled with hood health…(hood health? Lol) I mean, GOOD HEALTH…. and jolly finances in the future? (Your health is actually your life currency. I always forget to be good to myself.)

HELLOOOO ALL THE COCKTAILS!

Right, so I’ve got lots going on and Wunna Land is slowly, but surely slipping on its sexy pants, attaching rockets to the frilly bits…and getting ready to..

*WHOOSH WHOOSH DADDIO*

I’ve always taken chances. Far less impulsively as a grown up. As a 20 something in Hollywood, I was an IMPULSE NIGHTMARE…I learnt a lot of lessons fast and KARMA WAS AN ABSOLUTE TOTAL BITCH. 🙂 It made a decent 30 something year old. I’ll tells ya! And if you can’t be a decent ‘30 something,’ then you’re in BIG TROUBLE. I get that we all learn things at different speeds…But it’s much better to be wiser at 30 something, than to not.

Only DO WHAT YOU LOVE. Only do what you want. Be with someone who adores you. Who you adore. Respect them. Work hard. Take chances. Dreams come true all the time. Every moment of ever day, dreams have come true in my life…consecutively, throughout my whole entire existence.

Literally everything I dreamt of as a little one, in Yorkshire…came true and because I wasn’t afraid to give it a go. Win or lose. I was fearless. As a 13 year old girl, I told my mum and my friends, that I was going to MOVE to Hollywood, be a model and an actor….and marry a movie star. (Lol. That bit’s ‘cringe.’)

By the age of 21, I was there, in West Hollywood, at a ‘Buffy The Vampire Slayer’ audition, I had got scouted at a coffee shop by a modelling agent… and an actor had got down on one knee and asked me to be his wife. (We’re definitely divorced now, because we certainly weren’t right for each other.) BUT the point is, I did it. It happened. And I knew it would. I knew how that chapter of my life would happen, years before it did. I said it all the time, as a teen…and yeah lots of my teen friends, used to make fun of me for it…

But I did it… 😉

Everyone always sees the success part! I say that a lot, don’t I.

But, I haven’t had it easy. GOD! I didn’t even have it easy until the end of last year. I’VE WORKED my kitten arse off…DAY AND NIGHT... and as a single mum of two…

I juggled EVERYTHING, in order to try and make things happen. I worked lots. I got home, looked after the babies, I blogged. I’d end up having to stay up late, to wait until Ruby & Junior were asleep. THEN wake up at 4.30am, to send out work emails, and hit the different time zones and whilst trying to negotiate ‘collabo’ deals…

At six o clock in the morning… my alarm would go off. I’d get ready for the day and wake the babies up, to do the school run, before smashing a REALLY BUSY work day and maybe even having to finish up late, jump on a train, work in a different city, sleep a little, and check out of a hotel at five o clock in the morning. (As my Mum looked after them.)

This is after having to wake up at  4am, just to get ready….I’d arrive back home at around 7.30am..Do the school run and start the work process over again. 🙂

SO…IT HASN’T BEEN EASY!

But…I DID IT!

NOW! LIFE IS EASY! 🙂

So, yeah..I WILL HAVE a cocktail or FOUR, thank you very much. I’ll celebrate my life and inspire folk along the way.

Every single person who IS a success, has worked SO SO hard. They took risks. They didn’t settle for the life… they never wanted to lead. Yeah, they did what they had to, but their focus was always WHAT THEY LOVED. They made sacrifices. Even through the struggly bits, they believed in themselves. Even when they thought they didn’t…DEEP DOWN, they did.

And it started for me as a kid… I was at dancing school, after normal school…Then acting class, this class, that stage show, an audition here, an audition there…It started when I was five years old, after I BEGGED my little Burmese doctor parents to send me off to perform ANYWHERE, because I was definitely doing their heads in.

I loved it.  I lived for it.

DREAM BIG, WORK HARD. COMMIT TO IT.

(It’s the same when it comes to love.)

It’s weird, because I feel like, there are tons of people who DREAM of having a certain life…They want to LIVE that life….YET AREN’T WILLING TO PUT IN THE WORK, or take the chances? They try and short cut their way to it. (Yet, If you take a ‘short cut,’ you kinda get ‘cut short.’)

And then you have the people who grumble and ‘hate’ on the people who are doing, or have done well. *YAWN.* Things like that, never bother me, because i’m pretty confident and emotionally grown. I’ve been through everything and back again, in stilettos and with a wink.

But I know, that a lot of people find it difficult…So listen up…

When someone hates on you, it’s NEVER about YOU and ALWAYS ABOUT THEM. They’re really transparent & very usually a keyboard warrior.’ So, if you’re getting hated on along the way, don’t let it bother you. Keep doing what you love. I’ve NEVER seen a hater, have a better life, than the person they are actually having a go’ at. And I’m saying this because I watched a really talented human get ‘hated on’ socially by his friends, simply because he went to an audition to be on a TV show. I hope that really talented human, becomes a really big success, one day.

It’s about taking chances without fear…and definitely having the ability to not absorb any negativity thrown at you and instead learning to use it as motivation.

(Why am I sounding like a Self Help book today??? Must be the carbs.)

I mean, on my ‘socials’ these days, I’m receiving a lot of ‘love’ from people and then once in a while, someone will pop into Wunna Land with their knickers all a twist, OR they’ll just be wanting to have a go at ‘trolling’… for attention.

I mean, a few weeks ago someone sent me a DM simply saying,

‘Nob..’

I’ll give’em that. Lol.

Then I recieved another one reading, …

‘You moronic fuck face.’

Yet straight afterward, they deleted their entire profile. Meaning, the last DM they wanted to send was TO ME…and they needed it to say the ABOVE. 🙂

Hahaha…

It’s just life…How it is. Then two minutes later, my inbox and comment feed with filled with love.

Simples.

Laugh it off. Get on with your story…Be a success.

I always reckon, it’s the ones that have chosen to do something out of true LOVE and passion…dipped in determination, be it loud or quiet, that get the best results.The ones that have put in the years of time, years of effort and have steadily grown their own world of ‘clout’…that make it and LAST.

They didn’t take the short cut…they carved their own looooooooooong, steeeeeady path and walked it, ALL THE FLIPPING WAY…with a wine.

Image may contain: 1 person, standing, tree, plant, outdoor and nature

Happy Weekend!

Chrissie.

PS/ Pardon my preachiness.

PPS/ I need to go on a diet. Someone help me!

 

 

 

 

 

 

Swag, Fire & Japanese Living Rooms

Image may contain: 1 person, sitting and indoor

I was laid in bed at 2am this morning, Googling ‘Japanese Living Rooms?’ It was dark. I was naked. I couldn’t sleep because my mind was a swirling with, let’s say ‘solutions.’ (The good thing about me, is that if there’s a problem…a big one…I am really good at finding OUR strength in YOU, evoking my kitten strength and with ‘fire’ creating a more positive solution. I get it from my Mama. Sometimes we do Versace rings, other times we do solutions.)

So, i’d had this brilliant day with Ruby and Junior and The Wunnas. We shopped, we lunched, we movie watched a home…(Karate Kid with Jaden Smith in) and the children were a DREAM. I couldn’t even believe how flipping good they were! I even kept having to TELL them how good they were because, I couldn’t at all believe it!

Ruby: We’re just really happy …’

AWWWW!

(When you’re a Mum. You LOVE HEARING THAT!)

I couldn’t be too bothered with tending to all my ‘socials,’ yesterday, as I do it all week long…I needed a moment off and you never get a moment off….So I posted a quick ‘throw back’ picture, that I actually really love…and got on with my family day.

YIPPPEEEEEEEEEEE! BEAMING!

Balance is everything.

(So if prosecco.)

Brilliant day. Superb! I am the luckiest glamour puss alive and i’m steaming ahead with work, feeling FREE, embracing opportunity and just really enjoying life at 37. It’s easy. But anything you love, or anything that fits you like a glove (be it in work or love) is simple. There’s no stress. No hassle. I like no stress and no hassle.

So, I’m happy.

Image may contain: 1 person, indoor Image may contain: 1 person, sitting and indoor

Around, 9pm, we’re all at mine, settled, chilling and scattered around the home. The kids are in pj’s. I’m in my comfies, which is pj bottoms and just a bra. It’s either that…or just pj bottoms. I’m not really bothered about hiding behind a million layers.. I’m body confident. I even love my wibbly bits, that shouldn’t really be wibbly. I might not be ‘Vogue’, but i’m alright. I’ll live. 🙂

Do KNOW that BOTH my children are body confident because of my ‘no quarms’ attitude to my own body. I guess, I accidentally taught them that. (Saying that, I also taught them to be ‘Divas,’ which isn’t one of my best qualities.)

Anyway, around 8 pm, my mum’s still at mine and she slowly walks, whilst reading a text, upstairs to m room to deliver some ‘awkward news.’ She thought it was bad news. I did for a second. It actually made me grumpy for a moment because she had passed it on the ‘worry parcel,’ (as I like to call it.)

I dropped that ‘parcel’ straight away because it’s not what i’m about. I’ll find a solution with a smile and move it forward with ‘gusto.’ I’m the most flexible, really prepared human being. Lol

My Mum’s really blunt, so she’ll just ‘say it out…’ like I would… I liek that about her. There’s not jigger pokery. Just the facts.

Plus, I hate it when people over ‘dramatize’ situations. I say it all the time, y’know…when they make a ‘mountain out of a molehill.’ They only either do it because their own life lacks a ‘thrill,‘ they’re just dull, weak, or they want attention. Lol. That’s my Prosseco theory!

I once dated a boy, who always did that and it annoyed me SO MUCH…that I left him. I can’t stand it that much. 🙂 I just believe that strong people find solutions. We share strength. (My chick friends will tell you..I am awful at sympathy. Hahaha.) Find your swiggedy swag!

Long story short…

I believe everything DOES happen for a reason…So after a moment to myself, a big old think….I marched downstairs with my ‘solution’ face on and my positive ‘I’ve got this Mum’ vibe, in full force.

I’m good like that!

I gave some really big SPEECH. Like I was some kind of Locker Room coach and my team was getting beat…then I wrapped it up with charm, love and ‘so this is what we’re doings…’ and just like that….everyone slept well.

I laid awake until 2am. Haha Maybe, I talk shit and just take on other peoples stress for them?

In a second, we were sorted. Bad news, was turned into good, to the point where I dare say that I’m excited. I can’t tell you about it yet…but it involves a ‘doer upper.’ Basically, I was just sick of ‘silly dallying’ around and letting someone try to ‘Rule The Roost.’ I took it into my own hands and now it’s getting sorted.

*Cya Doll!*

Wunna is SWAG!

God, I had some much stuff to tell you, but instead i’ve rambled on about all that! But yes, that’s how I ended up Googling ‘Japanese living rooms.’ I couldn’t sleep, because my mind was POSITIVELY busy. I was actually gonna Snapchat the fact that I couldn’t sleep…but whenever I do, everyone messages me frantically because they can’t sleep either…Makes me phone buzz, literally every second, which keeps me up even more. Lol.

I’m loving Sunday. I hope you are too! I’m on my newsfeed and everyones now engaged or getting married. Even flipping Ed Sheran!

GO ON! GOOD BOY!

Someone inboxed me a poem this morning…So I’m saving the read for this afternoon. It’s the same guy who follows me on Instagram, a Wunna Land Fan…He sent me the other one previously, which I posted in my blog. I liked it. It was lovely of him.

I love a poem! Even if it’s just ‘comedy.’

I also recieved the most beautiful card all the way from one of my Gay guy besties in LA, THEO…who i’ve known for 10 years. He is one of my BEST BEST FRIENDS. He sent me the card,just to remind me that he ‘loves’ me and ‘misses’ me…I’ll tell you all about it in my next post, as I need to head off to buy foundation and find breakfast.

I love that my other LA guy friend ‘Tarik,’ (he actually hosted a show called ‘Flab to Fab’ years ago in LA, that a ‘before he was super famous’ Perez Hilton was on. Anyway, Tariks all buff, married and funny. He used to always have a soft spot for Me or any chick really and he’d continuously lean over the gym counter attempting to whisper ‘sweet nothings,’ at me, like I was his world….

Tarik: ‘Bitch, you should love me.’

Me: ‘Hahah. Get lost dude. I don’t. You need to go back to Romance Camp.’

Anyway, he was asked to turn the music up louder, in his home, so it felt like a ‘party party.’ ONLY IN LA, will you hear a guy, before a music turn up, utter the words,

‘GIRL, HOLD MY PROTEIN SHAKE…’

Right, i’m off.

I need foundation.

I hope you love Sunday toooooooooo!

Chrissie x

 

 

2018, Kittens & Baby Pink Undies

Image may contain: 1 person, text

I sailed into 2018 peacefully, armed with the mighty words, that I accumulated via The Fine God, that is P.Diddy…

‘Too blessed to be stressed.’

I had a wonderful 2017. I don’t have to go through it all, because…well, you all know what happened, I wrote a diary about it almost every day. (Well, I told you the bits that I wanted to tell you. 😉 )

It was a big year of ‘building.’ The kinda year where you have a plan, yet FOR ONCE you actually go about ‘being productive’ with it all. For example…How can I put it?  Last year, I didn’t sit and WATCH the fitness video, whilst eating a packet of crisps. I STOOD UP AND DID THE VIDEO.

Changes were made. Changes that put ‘happiness’ first and because of all that sassy sizzle of hard work…this year….in 2018, I should be rubbing two sticks together and finally making a fire.

There’s been lots of moments where in which *sparks* were lit, yet the fire didn’t burn…because I couldn’t dedicate time to it.

So with ‘timing is everything’ as my cliche. In 2018, i’m just gonna get on with it. That fire will burn.

This is my year.

(And I do mean that in both work and love. People always ask me about my love life…When it comes to love…I very much put my hand on my heart and swear by fate.)

How you all feeling? I’ve watched all your Snapchat & Insta stories and lived your New Year’s Eve with you!

So whether you woke up in a new city, or with a strange human laying next to you, or on a friend.. of a friends sofa… or at home with the kids, on your own..whatever happened? Whether you woke up hungover, sober or immersed in an accidental new chapter…KNOW… that you’re fine.

It’s Monday. It’s cool. You can use January 1st as an excuse to ‘start over.’

During the day, I had a busy New Years Eve, as I was on a train with Ruby & Junior (and my Mum) at 9.12am. I was on Platform Six, at Doncaster train station and headed into Leeds to go do lunch, a ‘Meet and Greet’ and stroke kittens at The Kitty Cafe.

Popular place. I had a WONDERFUL TIME. Really happy to have met you all. (I was late because my Taxi Driver didn’t know how to get there. I hate that, because if I was a taxi driver…I’d KNOW HOW TO DRIVE PLACES.) Fabulous wonderland. That place is spankingly bouji. It’s peaceful, yet busy and I’d say the perfect place to take your children….if they adore kittens.

Ruby & Junior LIVED FOR IT. I couldn’t get them out of the place! I had to pretend that we were buying a kitten, that would magically arrive at our home… by post? JUST TO GET THEM TO LEAVE.

I actually couldn’t believe how amazing the cafe was! You should absolutely go for the experience. However, I was there to ‘meet you’ and ‘greet you’…and that pretty much was my focus. (I love that you can order a Japanese flowering tea there. All the BOUJ!)

Just so you know! There’s actually going to be A GREAT DEAL of opportunities to ‘Meet Me’ and ‘Greet Me’ throughout this year. I’m excited to see you. I love it. It’s my favourite part of the ‘ball.’ A lot of you are asking…So yes, do not fret! The opportunity to say ‘hello’ and tinker in Wunna and will be there.

But anyway, my New Years Eve, was all about family. I had everyone around at my place and after a dance off, a few drinks, a bit of food, mixed in with the art of acting out ‘Little Mix’ videos. (Junior LOVES a shindig. He went bonkers with his dance moves and pout. His soul is every inch Wunna Land. Ruby is sassy, sophisticated, but FUN.)

Junior: ‘Mum, swing that chandelier thing about…No!  Do it really fast, so it makes the room look like a party.’

(Olly Murs ‘Dance With Me’ was on in the background, so loud that you couldn’t hear anyone speak at all. I guzzled Prosecco and forgot to think about my waistline. Oh and DO KNOW, that a Diet Guru did actually contact me and you will SEE which plan I think i’m going to go with….over the next couple weeks. Oh! And everyone keeps messaging me, asking what my New Years resolutions are? I haven’t thought that far ahead yet. Lol. Do people still make New Year resolutions? I thought they had been buried with the art of giving Christmas cards?)

Bottom line, I don’t like to restrict myself, simply because my life turns insane at points and I need to be emotionally and physically ‘flexi’ enough to Rumba along with it, without ‘Stop Signs’ and ‘Tut Tut, Shakey Fingers’ telling me to ‘Watch out.’

There was definitely a point last night where I found myself with a left handful of Jelly Babies & a right handful of Bombay Mix.

Oh the glamour!

I ate out of both handfuls..gracefully. Infact, a tiny piece at a time, like I was the Queen.  Then washed it down with prosecco..ungracefully…like I was Captain Jack Sparrow…in a faux fur….Or did I do it like I was Ru Paul? I can’t decide?

Anyway, the family party is going on downstairs. I tinker upstairs to find something. Lords knows what? Maybe my dignity, some help, a cocktail bar, Elvis? Who Knows???

I saunter into my room, slip into my’ comfiest comfies’ and then accidentally fall asleep in my pj’s at around 11.30pm without telling anyone, just before the whole ‘HAPPY NEW YEAR,’ hoo haa. (I do that..When I need to rest, I just disappear…and get comfy. That’s why I always love guys who like to kick back and get comfy, in their comfies.)

Mum: ‘I walked upstairs to find you and you were tucked in bed, with the lights out fast asleep, with a giant bottle of Prosecco by your bedside…even RUBY stayed up!! Haha.’

Woke up this morning feeling,

FRESH AS A DAISY.

So FRESH, I was *breezy.*

So CLEAN, I was *squeaky.*

Tried a whole ‘dazzle’ of Ann Summers numbers on, before noon. Delightful little pieces of ‘cheeky, cheeky.’ I love Ann Summers, I think it’s GREAT. I’ve obviously worked alongside them previously, as I designed a Sex Toy range, with Jacqueline Gold (CEO of the company,) which was filmed and aired on Channel 4. I was ‘fitted’ into all sorts of pieces this morning….Some played well with my body…Some got the ‘thumbs down…Something got the ‘YES!!! THAT’S IT!’ ( I love those moments.)

Image may contain: 1 person

Then I had fish and chips. (Yay! Well done Diet Queen.) And because I worked SO HARD during 2017 and because (here we go) I have such an exciting 2018 of ‘work hard’ but with results for you to enjoy…I kinda wanted to just rest today. I’m already in my comfies, sat on my bed blogging, with a wine.

 So January the 1st. 2018…Wunna Land rested. Lol.

What? If my soul needs to rest, it’ll rest and if my soul needs to play…it’ll play.  🙂 🙂

Tomorrow…I’m headed in with a wink…

Welcome to 2018.

Image may contain: 1 person, text

Check out my Instagram & Facebook Stories for Wunna Land ‘Behind The Scenes’ moments.

x

 

Boo Tricka Hoo & Fitness Guru’s

Hey! Cheeky Boo’s! Happy Halla’s. (That’s meant to be cute talk for Halloween. As in, Boo ‘tricka’ Hoo talk. J ) Now, I’m not someone who can be bothered to celebrate Halloween. I mean, I do it for the kids. But let’s face it. When you’re thirty six, a Glamour Puss, with a cocktail schedule to fit in…You really can’t be arsed to walk around the chilly breezed streets, dressed as a suggestive looking pumpkin, or even bob around to your mate’s, mate’s shindig to sip Prosecco, with lunatics. Lol. I’m casually building an empire. I can do Halloween some other time. 😉 The only pumpkin’s I want to see are ones, carved for me, in the comfort of my own home that are casually filled with rum….with straws.

Anyway! I have a lot on. My life is completely changing. I’m feeling really powerful. I’m feeling all W.O.M.A.N. I’m a bit SASSY today. Yet, i’m going to blame it on Halloween and the Dark Side getting me. (Even though I can’t be arsed to celebrate it.)

Things are exciting. Really exciting. But I will say that away from the excitement,  there are extremely long moments where in which one of my best chicks friends ‘Fairytale Blond’ are submerged utter boredom. (I don’t know how we’re getting through the weeks, but we are…with smiles and probable evening wine.) Don’t let dullness sponge its way through you. Change your environment. It’s really bad for you and gives you wrinkles.

I cannot TELL YOU, how utterly important I think it is to DO WHAT YOU LOVE. I say it all the time, I know. But just listen…again. J I’m always one to believe in just being brave and going for it, as you really have nothing to lose, other than lost time. That’s all you have to lose, when you look at the big picture. Happiness and success…and all that jingle, only really happens when you commit to doing the things that you love. And I don’t just mean that in work. I mean that romantically also. It makes such a huge difference. So take a look around yourself today and see whether you’re in ‘Zone Happy’ or just settling because you have to. If you’re just settling, or not working towards something magical that makes you smile…then that’s you done. You might as well ‘grey’ button yourself out for a while, until you wake up.

My New Year is going to rock with shimmie bells and simply because I became brave, stuck a feather in a cap and went with ‘galloping’ to ‘dreams come true.’ (I’ve glamourised that. I don’t gallop.)

But for example… ‘Hustle Barbie’ spoke to me before the weekend, across a desk, with files by her side and said,

‘I don’t know what to do? It’s like I need someone to make my decisions for me.’

Me: ‘You do know what you want to do. You’re just scared to. Which actually DOESN’T make you indecisive. It just makes you a scaredy cat.’

Fear is awful. Don’t do it. It gives you a stress rash. No one wants a rash that begins with ‘Stress.’ Infact, no one wants any rash really, it goes badly with cocktails and first dates. ‘Double B’ currently has thrush, after recovering from tonsillitis. Lol. Normal people wouldn’t then suggest that ‘being a stripper’ might possibly be a better money making’ option for her.

Me: ‘What???? Yeah, best stripper ever! This one comes with THRUSH and Tonsillitis. £20 a dance! Haha.’

Away from that, last night after reading Junior his bed time story. He went for Hansel and Gretel. When I say read, we kinda only watch the ‘read for us’ story together on his tablet. Lol. But he loves it, so that’s all that matters. He adores me laying next to him for a love and a cuddle. I adore a love and a cuddle too with Baby Junior also. It’s bliss.

But anyway, when his little eyes surrendered to sleep. I tucked myself into my own bed, turned out the lights and like everyone began to scroll through my Instagram, Twitter and Facebook. Great tool for catching up with what is going on, secretly stalking the people you fancy, promoting yourself and LEARNING. I love to learn. But only the things I want to learn. 😉

After Googling a whole bunch of people. (I’ve noticed that I never Google myself now. I used to always Google myself.) Anyway, I ended up cyberlanding in the world of Joe Wicks. Done pretty well for himself, hasn’t he! What an amazing. What a talent! He’s built a big old social fitness empire, that has developed into utter success, tv and riches, via the fine art of inspiring others to be fit and healthy. Great guidance occurred before the magic happened. Welcome The Body Coach.

I read all about him…Infact, I was so inspired, I almost signed up for his 90 day fitness plan.  If he can get ME to almost dedicate my life to fitness (eating lean I can already do) than he’s  GODLY. I wish he did the low calorie cocktail version of his plan though. As i’m not sure it caters for Glamour Pusses. His fitness video is all shirtless and lunges, as you jog on the spot. A favourable routine that gets you results. My fitness video would be shopping in stilettos and stopping to LIFT your cocktail glass every 3 seconds. Great for the arms and the soul? If I sign up to his plan. I’m gonna need support. Lots of it. If it actually get through it…then I’ll label him a genius. I’ll leap to his offices and ‘Pineapple Dance Studios’ high kick in glee.

(I then Googled exquisite heart shaped diamonds. 😉 I loe a bit of Dalby Diamonds.)

Right! I’ve got to get ready now….I’ve got to get to work. But this Friday i’m in Leeds, Trinity Leeds, with Candy Mechanics…Where i’m going to be turned into a chocolate lollipop for kicks! I know! I love it. I’m so excited! I’ll tell you more about it when I get home…

Godda dash….