Leeds, Life & Cocktails

My weekend’s been great! Right from the ‘get go,’ it’s been filled with life. I feel like the luckiest girl alive and to be honest, I have no clue why? There’s just such a buzz that’s swirling around Wunna Land that is nothing short of ‘juicy.’ It’s contagious. Good luck seems to be pouring in (I almost typed ‘pouring gin,’ ) my confident is soaring and…well i’m just feeling great about myself right now. Just like anyone, I go through the ‘ups the downs’ and the dodgy parts that I find the WORST…which i label the ‘inbetweens.’ I’m ALL or NOTHING, always SOMETHING and never chilling in ‘grey.’ When I feel stuck in a rut, (and i’m talking about work) I make positive changes with ease. I don’t find changes, especially positive ones difficult…No one should. So many people are so scared to indulge in the things that they adore? Doing that goes against human nature. It goes against the natural grain of what your soul is made for. Right now…I’m feeling on top of the world and boy, I hope you are toooo!

Right, so Friday night is usually my chill night. I love my ‘Chill Friday,’ as I’ve usually Frisbee’d off a stunningly busy work week, making Friday all about home life, relaxing and refuelling to rubbish telly and take out, in over sized frillies and tshirts, with the kids.

This Friday, straight after work, I ventured off into Leeds with one of my girl besties ‘Hustle Barbie’ to enjoy a chick ‘Mate Date’ at Issho, where we delighted in the finest sushi and raw salmon cuts of ‘over ice’ sashimi, with large delicious ‘prosecco pours’ with bamboo mats, wasabi winks and really magical lighting in one of the most glamourously trendy new spots in Leeds.

I love Issho. It’s always great! Through the day, on an evening. It’s wonderful. The food is divine. The vibe is peaceful, sophisticated, yet stylishly cosy. And as the staff tinkered around us, pouring us fresh bubbles, and making sure our dinner was delightful, we chatted about life, love and where we thought we were headed over the next few months….I adore a good chick dinner out. A bouji one that is. 😉 It was great because I’ve never really hung out with JUST ‘Hustle Barbie,’ over dinner before. There’s always been everyone there. And when you hang out with someone on a ‘one to one’ basis, a layer of them peels away…and you become much closer, share secrets, enjoy laughter and learn about them away from ‘the show’ of life.

I had a really great time and I hope I do a hundred more sushi dinners with her, over prosecco, in great lighting.  I love getting to know people more closely and yeah…Friday was brilliant. We’re more similar than we ever knew and I admire her for it. She’s a really smart, ambitious yet gentle girl. She’s impressive because she’s thoughtful, fair and kind, yet someone who seeks more from life. She wants her happy ending…and we all deserve it! ( I mean GOSH, I even got to see her boudoir. She has a boudoir..

‘You’re making it sound like I own a brothel!’

Her home is spotless, almost like a ‘show home.’ As soon as her front door opens, it smells DIVINE and radiates style and simplicity. There was definitely a point where she came out of the shower however and thought I was sat on her cat Lol. I was knelt in her boudoir, bronzing my face in her big mirror, with my mini fur bag laid by my side. She walked in wrapped in a towel and thought I was sat on Rufus. Lol. Rufus is her glamourous ‘fur ball’ cat. )

Anyway, back to Leeds….

We had a whole bunch of gin in cocktail form, looked down at our phones and saw that ‘Firmonnell’ had found herself into Leeds with her chick friend bestie. She had no clue where she was, so kept sending us selfies and photos of her whereabouts and signs, after giving ‘train prosecco’ to a homeless person out of kindness.

So Hustle and I tinkered out of Issho, walked through the bouji Victoria Gate…and after the delightful elevator gentleman let us out to play under the Leeds night stars…(He couldn’t possibly imagine us walking up or down stairs, so demanded that we took the lift. Yet, i enjoy that there’s an elevator to the entrance of Issho, it just keeps life elegant…and easy. After gin, you want shit to be easy.)

Then we went to find ‘Firmonnell.’

Finding ‘Firmonnell’ was like an episode of The Crystal Fricking Maze. It was like the Matrix, where we were following photographed signs and voicemails across central Leeds, in order to be delivered to her whereabouts. And yeah, okay, we may have taken detours like a cheeky delicious Manahatta stop off, where we ordered Pornstar Martini’s, appreciated attractive humans and danced for Snapchat to the best tunes in all the land.  That might have happened, on our journey to find ‘Firmonnell.’  And we might have tried to stop of at the new ‘Neighbourhood’ bar, yet couldn’t because it was reservation night only. But in the end, we found her….at ‘The Roxy’ where the lager is poured and the beer pong is a played.

My feet KILLED by this point, THEY BURNED LIKE WITCHES GROINS and when we finally got there, turned around and saw her at the back bar all smiles and drunky, all innocent and light…it was almost a relief.

‘OH MY GOSH! FINDING YOU HAS BEEN A NIGHTMARE. MY FEET KILL BECAUSE I’VE TOTTERED AROUND THE WHOLE OF FLIPPING LEEDS TO FIND YOU!!!!!’

We danced, we drank, we laughed, we giggled. Hundreds more people showed up. I think ‘Hustle and I’ tried to go dancing with ‘Firmonnell’ who ended up staying for Beer Pong.’ The Roxy is cool. I’m just a Victoria Gate girl. My feet stuck to things and we didn’t have change for the photobooth and I saw all these empty red plastic cups, all squashed and squished all over a beer drenched ping pong table, that might have had stains on from 1992. It kinda made me gip a little, so ‘Hustle and I’ went off to do dancing….and agreed to meet ‘Firmonnell’ later.

We never ended up meeting. But I knew that would happen. I know ‘Firmonnell’ well and I adore her because we just do our own thing. Lol. We’re ace and just get on with it. It’s how good friends are! Phone tig occurred and ‘Fibre’ was Hustle and I’s choice of jiggle. We had a dance we let loose for a bit, I remember some guy coming up to me because he had me on Snapchat. Then whilst ‘Hustle Barbie’ I were sat downstairs in the cave like toilets, across from giant walled mirrors, we knew Friday was done. She simply said, ‘shall we go?’

Just like that, with our feet a killing, a missed all from ‘Firmonnell’ and earlier than expected, we were in a taxi home. ‘Hustle’ got dropped off first and then my Taxi driver, who ha dno clue where he was going tried to drop me off IN BARNSLEY!

‘You needed to get off at Junction 32!!! WHY ARE WE AT JUNCTION 38!!!’

I got home. I crashed. I woke up the next morning bright and early and spent the entire day shopping, lunching and hotel nighting with my gorgeous little babies Ruby and Junior. They had an audition for a commercial, which they absolutely loved. They loved it as much as I loved chilling in Prosecco Pit Stop waiting for them to finish. J It made me smile. It seems ‘The Wunna Babies’ are actually a ‘thing’ now and like I’ve said before they’re getting offered a lot of opportunities, that I am NOW letting them enjoy. You only live once! Embrace everything that comes at ya! Plus, I believe that NOTHING is better than doing things with the people you love. So whilst I have ‘Opportunity Central ‘ going on in Wunna Land…which i’m really truly grateful for, they actually have THEIR OWN THANG going down….which I guess, on the whole, makes us lucky.

HOTEL NIGHT was wonderful. The kids LOVED IT! I loved it.  I mean, all we did was dinner, chill in our undies, snuggle in our beds and watch telly as a family, but it was BLISS. It was amazing. It was PERFECT! Almost a novelty because I treasure ‘down time.’ Time where in which I can all chill and relax without any worries, or stress. Time where no one can bother us or know what we’re doing. The kids loved it so much. That night, we had the best sleep EVER.

‘I love you mum.’

‘I love you tooo.’

Then as sod’s law kicked in, my phone rang, schedules were put in place. I had a last minute Sunday audition, They had a last minute Sunday audition.

We had to wake up at 7am, for Junior to get picked up by 8.30am…and Just like that…everything went back to normal…..

 

Tuna, Chicks & Bedroom Banter

Mel: ‘I love how you’ve all been sat laughing and joking and spent ya day filled with absolute banter, but as soon as I come out here, to give you five minutes of my precious time, everyone shuts the fuck up, stops talking and starts being all quiet and boring, like they’ve got so much work to do!!’

Thursday was great! It was the most relaxed, easy going, good time kinda day that every kitten needs in their life. No pressure. No drama. Just laughter, banter and hard work. And that hard work that seems so easy because everyone is just having a really good time. I laughed a lot today and it made my soul smile…and GOD I was pathetic and feeling all unloved through half of it, yet when you have great friends, good company and chicks who can take the utter piss out of you for kicks…life is just wonderful. It doesn’t take that much to make someone smile…It’s contagious…and once the happy macarena train starts…it bounces from being to being, until the entire room is filled with glee.

I’m not gonna go through everything that happened through the day, as I want you to just feel it…Instead i’m going to give you snippets of all that was said…

‘Does that say drop arses everywhere?’

‘You’ve spelt my name wrong.’

‘She showed me a hamster, on acid in the meeting…’

‘It was a guinea pig.’

‘I just don’t eat things in tins.’

I’m a veggie now…’

‘You fucking had KFC.’

‘Why is everyone palming me off.’

‘Don’t be jealous because I have a Facebook spiritual advisor and you don’t.’

‘She’s sniffing out the cheese.’

‘Fucking speccy eyed cock.’

‘Why doesn’t he love me!’

‘I don’t have bush! My mum does though!’

‘Honestly how many times can someone say TUNA in the space of 3 minutes.’

‘Yeah we’re on a mate date tomorrow. That’s why she’s getting her hair done.’

‘I love spam.’

‘You’re vile.’

‘I only use *not tested on animals* Body Shop Makeup.’

‘Well i’m pretty sure your bronzer is *tested on animals* MAC’.

‘I love that the advent calendar is fucking upside down.’

‘You’re like my wife AND mistress.’

‘No. I’m not having sex with you.’

‘Stop trying to trick me into a date.’

‘I’ll let you dip it in.’

‘She honestly has a clump for a hand.’

‘We’ll show each other our boobs just to piss you off, cos you’re not there.’

‘I fucking have standards. I sleep with hot girls.’

‘Why do guys always only boast about the HOT ONES they’ve slept with and forget to discuss the munters.’

‘She’s not a fucking empath, she’s a fucking weirdo Chrissie,’

‘Stop being sad now. He does love you. ‘

‘You’re so impulsive you need to stop.’

‘My mojo is on POINT.’

The strangest banter occurred. I mean there was a point where we were just naming all the things a human could possibly make with tuna, simply because Mel had a water infection and bought some from Tescos. Then Hustle Barbie showed me a guinea pig in shades, that definitely looked like it was wankered during an executive power point meeting, which was before she dribbled a banana down her face, which ended up dollop plonking itself, from her tight banana ‘willy’ hand clutch.

There may have also been a moment where in which all the girls LAUGHED OUT LOUD at the fact that we’ve certainly more than 10 times each pretended to love sex when you ‘can’t actually at all feel his willy because it’s so THIN.’ (We’ve all been there girls. 😉  Give them the show.) Don’t have shit willies and if you do, be extremely wonderful in other ways in the sack. I’m in my 30’s…Women in their 30’s are in their actual sexual prime. I own my bedroom time and rock my sheets. As a 20 something I will have pretended you were great. As a 30 something, I take control of my sheet time with a guy. My kingdom. My way! Yet, each one of my chick friends and I at some point in life, on numerous occasions, have pretended sex was great…during sex…because it’s good manners. I did that a lot in LA or when I was young. No one likes bad sex. I hate bad sex now that i’m a grown up. And bad sex comes around more than you think. When you have good sex…keep it.  If looks, personality and actual love comes with it….MAKE IT YOURS FOREVER.

Then some random conversation about sex lists happened…

Who knew that people were organised enough to keep actual lists of how many people they slept with? Lol. Everyone seemed to pop out some sex list that had been written in either biro or text into a phone note section. Lol. I mean GOSH, one of my guy friends had typed in every single girl he had ever slept with, next to a number and the country they were from.

‘When will you ever need that list dude!!!!!!’

‘Well who knows, I could end up with some infection and this way it’s much easier because I can just copy& paste one message to each girl, in one go! Hahaha.’

‘Do they count on the list if you don’t remember actually having sex with them?’

‘You should marry number fifty cos you can’t finish on an odd number. I wouldn’t like that me.’

‘You can be my 48’

‘You can be my 117.’

‘Did you know that the average sex partner number is six.’

‘What! Who the hell has only slept with six people??’

‘Well i’ve only been in two long term relationships. I married the second girl.’

‘As if you’ve actually put their nationality on your list.’

‘You’re so well traveled…sexually.’

‘How many guys have you slept with Wunna?’

 

Now, I don’t keep a list. There ain’t no list happening in Wunna Land. We all know I have stories from my delicious Hollywood youth. But I kinda just keep the in my brain for me to treasure and for you to not ever find out. Lol. I love being a grown up and I love sex, but if i’m going to be honest, I kinda just pleasure myself more than I do anything else these days and I love it. This year, I’ve only slept with one person, The rest of the time…I’ve absolutely rode it solo sexually Lol.

I will tell you though that I don’t judge a girl or guy on any list, simply because I would hate for someone to judge me on mine. 🙂 AND because I’m secure enough to not be bothered about someone’s past, I just look forward to the future. 😉  The future is always way more exciting…and people have different types of chemistry in the bedroom. It just takes that one girl or one guy to sweep you off your feet and like I always say, add true love and you can’t help it….you’re hooked.

It’s almost fricking magical.

I’m done now!

Have fun!

Chrissie x

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Life, Marriages & Think They Knows

It’s a funny old thing this life marlarky isn’t it? One minute you can be on the top of the highest mountain ‘star jumping’ to the sound of absolute delight and then all of a sudden, and just like that, The Gods can come and pull that rug from under you and send you off into a spin…a downward spin where you lose your grip.

I’d say i’m quite good at life. I’ve mastered the creative art of it…. In most areas. When I say ‘mastered’ I simply mean that ‘I get it.’ I’m not saying i’m some kind of life champion, I’m just saying that I’m the QUEEN of living my OWN life the way I want to and happily. Even though my love life, seems like it’s been so shit over the years…I can tell you, on the whole, i’ve been quite lucky and been really happy. Happier and luckier than most. It doesn’t seem that way, but I have. Whenever I wasn’t chipper…I changed it, or dealt with it. Made It better. And yeah, there are moments where in which I wish I could ‘moonwalk’ backwards and do things a little differently, simply for closure. Closure that I never received. Yet the fact is that you can’t…so you might as well pull your ankle socks up and get on with it, with a smile. (It doesn’t matter if it’s real or fake…you kinda just have to get on with it. Bad moods, or bad times are really only temporary and people ALWAYS forget that. And yeah I may be coming across as a little ‘Rainbow Brite,’ yet I don’t care because by nature i’m a person who will focus on what is positive about a situation or person, rather than give power to the parts that are negative. Yeah, it can make me look a fool at times. I’ve had my heart and trust broken because of this delicious little manner, a zillion times over. In business and work i’ve trusted people that I shouldn’t have. The shit talkers. J Yet, if you stay true to who you are and stay loyal to what you believe is right…then fuck it….the things or people that ‘stick’ or even more so MAKE THE EFFORT to ‘stick’ are the things and people that are right for you.

(I’m getting this weird flashback of being 24 in LA and running outside in the dark by wheely bins, after an argument with my first husband Mike. It was street lit and the stars were above me. Everything around me was quiet. It wasn’t a big argument. It just felt big at the time. He’d always chase me whenever we fell out, because I would always rush off and leave the room. Only if it was filled with people. It looked to others that ‘the rush off’ was because I was a ‘such a DIVA.’ But really, the ‘rush off’ was always because I didn’t want anyone to see me cry. He always knew that. So as soon as I made an exit dash…he would rush after me. I’ll always take myself away from a negative moment or environment in order to find some kind of positive. He stopped me and turned me around, after chasing me down the street shouting ‘CHRISTINA.’ He never called me ‘Chrissie.’ Infact, his only other nicknames for me were ‘Shorty Doo Wop’ or ‘Baby.’ Anyway, he held my wrist gently and said,

‘INTENT is EVERYTHING and I didn’t intentionally mean to hurt you. I love you. I’ll make it right. INTENT is EVERYTHING CHRISTINA, EVERYTHING. Just stop, a second. Don’t forget who I am!!!!’

It sounds weird him saying that, I know. Lol. Yet this argument was at a time when we were both newly doing very well in our careers, he was on a big US TV show, money and ego has been pouring in and what he meant, or what he needed me to remember in that time, was who he was, on the day we first met, in that acting class….when life was really simple. We were so innocent and he was so happy because we’d been put in the same group. He turned around and whispered to his best friend Tyler, who had come from New York with him and said…on that day…’I’m gonna marry that girl.’ I remembered and he knew that I’d remember. So when I stopped dashing….I just stopped….and just like that…we were okay. Later down the line, we weren’t okay. No one knows why but him and I. Everyone thought they knew why. But they didn’t. Everyone said they knew why…but they didn’t. Neither him and I to this day, ever told anyone why, because we respect one another. Everyone made fun of that time, like it was ‘blip’ of a little marriage…that only lasted around a year. When the truth is, what you saw only lasted a year…it went on for 4 more years behind closed doors. It only ended because I suddenly had to move to England. I didn’t have a choice. I didn’t tell him because I didn’t have chance. Everything was just so quick….He thought I had just changed my number. It was a really traumatic time, that he never forgave me for. We’re ten years on from that time now….Completely different people, with completely different lives, both a success in our own rights. We live in different parts of the world. We’re both the happy with the paths that we chose. The time we were both together was simply a life a chapter. A ten years ago chapter. I learnt, no…we learnt…a lot from one another, in that time. And the best thing about it ALL, is that we could both be in the same room, full of people, look back and with blissful memories, laugh and take the piss out of that time! One of the greatest things about Mike, is that even though he’ll secretly flashback the bad bits, to me he’ll only ever remind me of the good bits.

‘Remember that time, when you came to New York and you were stood shouting outside the bakery at 3am because you needed more bread and I gave you that twig as a gift because I couldn’t afford anything else.’ )

As if i went on that big a tangent.  I’m hormonal right now. I’ll blame the hormones. Just go with it….Where were we? Oh yeah…life…

More than anything, yeah I’d say I’ve lived and it’s all been a very colourful time, with people ‘oohing’ and ‘arring’ at me. (And that doesn’t bother me because at least i’m not DULL. At least i’ve lived some kind of life where in which people have had the chance to ‘ooh’ and ‘arr’ at me, which is what I wanted and therefore it has made me happy. Life is about being happy. Like ‘Diddy’ said, ‘Happy is the new rich.’

But don’t be dull.

Nothing is WORSE TO ME, THAN PEOPLE WHO CAN’T STOP BEING DULL. You know who you are! Don’t do it to me. It gives me a rash. Whenever, I see dull humans, it makes me feel as though they have no grasp of the art of living. And when I say don’t be dull, I don’t mean you need to be hurtling yourself off a cliff on a bungee rope for insta likes. That can still be dull, if you’re dull. It can be anything, from those that daren’t speak their mind. Those that let people walk all over them. Those that can’t stand up for what they believe is right. Or those that try to be ‘goody goody’ and judge others for being fun. AWWWWWWWWWWW! Don’t be dull. Lighten up. It’s the worst.

Know that you’re exactly where you’re meant to be. You’re certainly one decision away from a completely differently life…They are quotes that I’ve read that I believe. So, no matter what, even though there is magic in the air, you are ALWAYS in control…..and if I hate anything, I hate a loss of control. You’ll never find me doing anything, that I do not have a handle on. Even as a child I was that way inclined.

Right now, i’ll tell you, that my life feels so filled up. I can’t find space to relax. I can’t find time to do the things I want to do. Just a moment of silence. Just me. Just ‘sshh.’ The kids have put ‘Wannabe’ on repeat, which is sounding out the upstairs of Wunna land, like it’s some kind of 90’s disco. I’m surrounded by people constantly that aren’t relaxing me! Lol. Everyone constantly wants me to do things for them. And I don’t want anyone to come near me unless they’re either going to massage me, deliver good news, love me or peacefully pour me a prosecco.

Tomorrow…will be a good day. I need a chill before it all gets busy.

I have a shoot to organize, infact THREE to organise, an advert to film, a book to write, four auditions to go to….and i’m meant to be in London next week but I just can’t find the time to get there.

Everything will be okay right? Everything will be okay….

Shortcuts, Interviews & Prosecco

‘Are you Chrissie?’

‘Yeah…Hi…’

(I gave her that ‘100 Watt’ Chrissie Wunna beam. 😉 )

‘You write that blog! My daughter reads it. She loves bloggers. She’s mad on them. She’s just bought that book on..what’s his name? Someone.. Dawson?’

‘Aww…yeah…’

(I was polite, because I didn’t exactly know who that was…Yet, neither did she, so I was on safe ground. Lol)

‘Anyway, i’ve started reading your blog. Thank you so much for coming back…’

‘Oh no…I love it here. The kids even love it here…’

The glamourous lady, all tanned and dark haired, with the perfectly pouty lips, sits down in my stylish yet comfy Prosecco Pit Stop booth. (I love Prosecco Pit Stop in Doncaster. It is a frequent afternoon haunt of mine. I used to go all the time when Shaun Applegate owned it, yet since he’s tinkered off to open up a new cocktail bar in the Victoria Gate, Leeds, which I can’t wait to visit once open, I believe this new sassy lady, is the brand new Pit Stop, ‘Boss Lady.’ I love her.)

‘I’ve just called my husband and said *Chrissie’s Here.* He told me to keep you here until he arrives. Lol. I love that blog, the one where your friend goes down on a girl with a Fishermans Friends. Lol. It’s just so hilarious. My 14 year old daughter showed me the post and asked me what it meant! Hahah!’

‘He actually went down on her with a Hall Soother.  ‘

Then we *paused* before a glamorous ‘girl on girl’ belly laugh and as my children returned back from a toilet trip with Grandad….we all, as a family enjoyed our Brushetta Brunch at our favourite little Doncaster Pit Stop.

‘Be good to me…’

Let’s be honest….She literally has nothing to worry about. I mean, if you’re a glamour puss and you own a Pit Stop that serves my body with Prosecco, then I’m probably going to adore you with every delightful inch of my kitten soul. Even if I tried, I couldn’t find a reason to dislike any human of that calibre.

But annnnyway…..

It’s a busy time in Wunna land and I know I keep harping on about how busy things are right now, but it’s pretty much the truth. My world is currently quite scheduled out and I’m feeling really lucky because I seem to have the best help at hand. I’m enjoying all my work, meetings, shoots, afternoon cocktails (I was at Ego yesterday afternoon) and just life in general. Early nights have been my favourite and yeah, i’m slowly but surely, getting everything built up and ready to take the next stiletto steps upward, upon that glitzy ladder of success. (When I say ‘Success,’ I don’t mean diamonds, riches and golden baths of wealth…Even though that really does sound like one of the most delicious plans. Why am I so stupid? That really is a great plan! Success to me is HAPPINESS. Finding your ‘happy’ and achieving it. Doing something that you love and yeah…having other people love and recognise what you do, feels good. I’m not gonna lie. It feels really good.

I write my blog to inspire. I inspire by telling my story. My own version of life. Everything else… comes from that….A really smart human once told me that if you give the world something of VALUE and simply because you LOVE doing it, you bizarrely get ‘Life Love’ back… threefold. It just comes to you. (That’s the ‘Candy Floss’ version of it. Yet, for shortcuts….having a great PR Team, also works just as well. 😉 I learn everything the hard way, so 10 years of tapping out my life as proved to be beneficial. I don’t know why I didn’t ‘shortcut’ the journey? I should’ve shortcutted the journey. Yet, good thing about missing the shortcut, is that fact that it made me SOLID in what I do.

You can say a lot. All that you want…but I’ve hit every road bump with a *BAZINGA.* Lol. Wunna Land is now one slick operation because of it. No one can take that away from me. I know my life. (Sounds weird, but some people still don’t know where they’re headed and that’s completely fine. You don’t have to know. You just have to be comfortable in the unknown zone. Just appreciate all that you have going on RIGHT NOW. Work hard. Have faith. Listen to your gut instincts and you’ll get there.) I don’t actually know what I’ trying to say, other than, if I can do it, ANYONE CAN. Don’t put yourself on a timer. It happens when it’s meant to happen. People…opportunities…everything finds you when it’s mean to. I’m only saying that because I always used to put myself on a timer.

Shortcuts are great. They’re great. But only when you’re ready. And i’m ready now…I’m all stable and filled with Va Voom. Yet with anything in life, be it in work or love…if you wish for longevity and not a short glittery *pan flash…* it takes the leg work.

Talking about my Va Voom, it’s certainly on point right now. Lol. I definitely heard ‘Firmonnell’ accidentally call me her ‘partner’ instead of her ‘colleague’ and my 20 something year old work colleague  ‘Jonesez’ kept sauntering around me and blushing…because he has some weird Asian girl fetish.

‘Why are you being weird and fancying me right now?’

‘Have you heard ya’self!!!

‘Is it the boobie thing?’

‘Hahah. No it’s the Asian thing.’

He hates feet though.

I have a busy week ahead. Junior’s loving school. Ruby’s loving life. And on Friday I have the Diversity in Media Awards. I’m up for ‘Blogger of the Year.’ I still haven’t bought a dress and I’ve completely run out of foundation. I forgot to go on my diet and had buckets of Piri Piri chicken wings and bread all weekend. But whatever….having bread wasn’t cheating on my diet. Trying to EVEN BE ON A DIET during the weekend, is surely cheating on BREAD.

I actually had so much other stuff to tell you today, but i’ve forgotten to *tap* it all out. Haha! Yipppee! It’ll have to wait until the next one. This blog has gone on too long today.

Yesterday there was a Chrissie Wunna Q & A in Inscriber Mag…. thanks to Kind Publishing. Incase you missed it…

Here’s the link for you to go and check it out…

http://theinscribermag.com/glamour-girl-burmese-beauty-q-and-a-with-glamour-model-author-and-blogger-chrissie-wunna/

 

 

Busy Minds & Early Nights…

A good day. I mean I’ve nothing to be complaining about really. I’m in a good place. But my minds busy. It’s so busy. I can’t rest it. It’s tiring me out and it’s filled with bundles of work and trundles of thought. I’m even going to have to ‘early night’ it, simply to chill my head. Calm it down. Give it some peace. This month, there’s a lot of work and excitement going on in Wunna land. My Land. So, like I said, it’s nothing bad. Infact, quite the opposite…it’s actually ALL REALLY GOOD. My kitten mind is just doing a jive and right now, I cant make it stop. It has a lot of energy.

Y’know, this only ever happens when I have a great deal going on, or there’s a wee bit of pressure that I kinda have to shimmie alongside. During times like this, I tend to go all quiet and withdraw. It helps me focus. Don’t fret. It’s all fine. I just need to rest my mind to pan pipe music or something lame like that. Lol. (Pan Pipe music always reminds me of that INSANE Chinese Lady in Camden who was in charge of massaging me and delivering total enlightenment to my soul, yet instead almost broke every fricking bone in my body. Haha. What a bitch! J  Don’t go there. SHE’S CRAZY!)

I’m writing my book, my audition went well..

Firmonnell: ‘You’re gonna get that…

and i’m shooting strong.

When it comes to all that. I’m pretty confident.

I have the Diversity in Media awards in 11 days. It’s such an honour. I’m way out my depth. I want to win the award. I won’t win it by any means. Yet, I feel really lucky to have been nominated and then shortlisted in such a great league, amongst some of the nations best talent! It’s insane and such a wonderful award to be representing. So, i’ll do my red carpet strut, tinker my MTV interview like a kitten and just enjoy my evening…(code for NETWORK the Hell out of Wunna Land. 😉 ) It’s being live streamed anyhow, so you’ll get to watch me lose. I’ll do that ‘Ah so happy for the winner’ face for you…then i’ll drink loads and do selfies with everyone.

Away from all that, life is great. I’m feeling really positive. I’m feeling gentle. I’m feeling beautiful. When a girl feels beautiful, she feels like she can conquer anything and it’s the single most divine feeling. Then all my chick friends all decided that they wanted to join some ‘fat club,’ that they’ve made up themselves, where in which they’ll all put in £1, weight themselves weekly at Boots (lol,) only in the name of ‘slimming’ and then whoever has lost the most weight, gets all the quids. Hahah!

Me: ‘I’m not arsed about playing the weighing game. I feel alright right now. I’m all curve happy.’

Firmonnell: ‘Yeah, but we want you’re quid.’

Me: ‘I’ll just watch you all and cheer you on.’

Firmonnell: ‘Yeah, but we want you’re quid.’

Me: ‘Hahah. I’m happy right now and this weighing game will make me all competitive and make me feel like i need to lose a pound just to win and beat you all. It’s pointless and stress for no reason.’

Mel: ‘I’m doing it. It’ll just have to be us.’

I look at Firmonnell…

Me: ‘You told me that looks don’t matter, that it all FADES and that all anyone has to be is FUNNY, so you’re not bored with whoever you’ve chosen to be with.. when you’re 80.’

This all came about because her hubby ‘Big D’ might go on a ‘lose a few pounds’ diet, after someone called him fat. This diet wouldn’t matter because obviously she’s married to him, she’s loves him madly and would love him madly always and anyway, until the say she dies. We all would.

I mean GOD, when I love someone, I love them no matter what. As time passes and you’ve built your bond, it becomes unconditional and nothing can break it, if it’s real. To me it doesn’t matter what they do, where they’re from, how chubby they’re getting…If i love & respect them and they love & respect me too….then that’s pretty much all that’s matters. I have NO CLUE how Big D’s ‘maybe diet,‘turned into a whole weighing game at Boots? Hahaha. That’s chicks for ya!

But this is guys for ya! I’ve just checked my Snapchat and one of my guy friends (he’s only a young 20 something) is looking or an ‘extra money’ Sunday job, because he managed to spend £300 on strippers in an hour on Friday night. Lol. If anyone needed love or a girlfriend more…it’d probably be him right now. He’s actually super romantic and can’t even cope without having someone to love. SO GIRLS. There you have it. If you wanna date my mate, inbox me and i’ll set you up. You’ll only have to dance to a Little Mix track for 3 minutes and you’ll at least make £20….but then you’d have to make him his tea.

I’m so glad i’m a grown up. Haha.

I mean, who can be arsed with being 20 something nowadays? It’s a shambles. Lol. Thirty something is so much sexier, as it’s dashed in a sensible whirl of duty. Yet you can still rock it in Louboutins,clink a cocktail and  strut it like a fox. Thirty something, be you a girl or guy…is HOT AS HELL. There’s a classiness to it. A ‘hey baby, i’ve lived and learnt, a little.’ (Do know that i’m only saying this because i’m a’thirty something.’ When i’m a ‘forty something,’ or even a ‘fifty something,’ that will be the new hot.)

Right, I said I was early nighting it, so i’ll love you and leave you!

But once again, thank you so much for following my life. It means a lot. I hope that somewhere in this absolute decade of blogging you find a piece of Wunna land that inspires you….

 

 

 

 

Hollywood Flashbacks, Swirls & Life

I’m feeling quite wonderful. Everything in my life right now, at thirty six is changing… and believe it or not…. for the absolute better. I’m growing up. No, that’s the wrong way to put it. I’ve grown up. And as the world is following my entire existence online via this diary. I can honestly say that I’ve never ever felt more together, more comfortable, more positive and kinda like the girl..the woman, that i always wanted to be. It took a long time…but for the first time, in that ‘long time,’ I can look back on my life. Look at everything i’ve tinkered in and tonkered with and actually SEE how far i’ve come, how much i’ve developed and how proud I am of the person I am today. I’m finding my ‘happy place.’ No.I’ve found my ‘happy place.’ And just to know that I’ve fought all the fights. I’ve danced with all the danger. I’ve lived. I’ve loved. I’ve been thrown down the ‘life stairs’ a million times over. Every time, I got back up. Even when I didn’t think I could. And every time I did, I took a deep breathe and marched forward (glamorously ofcourse 😉 ) with all the hope, all the faith and a smile on my face that knew everything, no matter WHAT, was going to be okay.

I’ve literally woken up all over the world and gone through the exact little procedure each time. I’ve worked so hard. I’ve loved and had my kitten heart broken over and over again. I’ve won some. I’ve lost some. But I’ve enjoyed every single little piece of my life so far. I’ve been thankful for it. Even the shit bits.

I’ve achieved so much, yet at the same time conquered all the rubbish that comes with the ‘ouchy’ parts. The parts of life, when the rug just gets pulled from under you, without warning and when you still have a prosecco in your hand. It made me who I am today. It made me mates with life. Best mates. And today in return, because of the friendship i’ve had with life, it kinda decided to cut me some slack.

So today, i’m gonna tell you, that you can be whoever you want to be, if you just make mates with life. It doesn’t matter how easy or hard you have it. See it. Believe. Make it yours.

It’s bizarre that i’m being so preachy, as my day started off hilariously. I sent ‘the swirl’ my usual morning message. I do every morning to wish him love. If I love or care about someone, it’s important for me, to make sure I tell them every day. Anything can happen. So i make sure the people I appreciate, KNOW that I do.

Anyway, I had texted out these really rubbish arrows as pointers with the words ‘this much’ typed between them. He replied with a..

‘Just that much. Haha.’

🙂

The rest of the conversation went…

‘Don’t get me started, you know what i’m like. I’ll end up sending you a truck load of dwarves dressed as Cupid, with I LOVE YOU tattooed on them.’

I wear my heart on my sleeve. I’ll go for it with ‘skin to the wind.’ I’m embarrassing on every level. But to me, things are perfect with ‘The Swirl.’ He’s just…well, I think he’s wonderful. I can’t stop thinking he’s wonderful…and that… on it’s own… is just so great. He makes my soul smile.

Then Mel sent me a group whatsapp picture of her giant bum bruise. She fell over the other night at the bar, stone cold sober, because the building was apparently made dodgily. Lol.

‘Those bloody steps at ABA.’

Hustle Barbie graced my world with a ‘Sandy from Grease’ wig. It arrived via post at around 10am and just chilled by her side like some creepy pet.

 ‘Alex said I look more like Margaret Thatcher.’

‘You look like Lily Savage.’

Then ‘Lady Shizzle’ informed us that she too was headed to a fancy dress party….as a..what’s it called? Those chicks that you see serving beer at the Bierkeller. Lol.

I don’t know where all these flipping ‘Fancy dress’ parties are coming from?

Me: ‘That’s fine. You all go to your parties. I’ll just show up at Firmonnells in fancy dress for kicks on a Saturday night.’

Firmonnell: ‘You need to do that. I have friends over Saturday night. I’ll text them all and make them all come in Fancy dress. Lol’

I do adore a bit of dress up. But I only really ever shimmied out a fancy dress number, in LA. And when I did, I was only ever a slutty cave girl or a belly dancer? So odd?

*FLASHBACK*

Remember the time I told you that I saved Gay Brandon’s life, after climbing to the top of a West Holywood apartment ROOF, DRESSED in my full slutty cave girl attire and WITH A FUCKING MANGO MARGARITA IN MY HAND. I properly saved his life. I really did!! He didn’t even want to live, until I showed up on that merry rooftop…to chill with him, under the stars…with my cocktail banter and stream of life lessons. Everyone was just sort of muddling around being worried. Understandably, ofcourse. I mean, they weren’t TOO worried. Let’s face it. It was Hollywood. We all had auditions ad early shoots we had to get to in the morning.

I don’t even know what came over me, but i just took it upon myself to go save him. Lol. Half way up, I was like…‘Ewww, I should just leave him up there.’ Haha. Great friend! But once you’ve tried to play ‘hero,’ you’ve just godda with it, don’t you…

Me: ‘You don’t really want to jump off this roof, do ya? Let’s just sit, have a drink, have a chat and well…if you do jump, i’m not coming with you. I’m at Warner Bros at 8.30am. Hahaha.’

Brandon: ‘Thank God your here. I’ve missed your face. I knew you’d come up. You’re stupid like that.’

Me: ‘Are you jumping because you’re gay, troubled, or sick of LA?’

Brandon: ‘Lol…because I don’t know who I am or what I am anymore? And I might even be BI?’

Me: ‘Oh, so you like girls AND guys. Cool. Great news. Can we go back down now…. And don’t be dramatic over the sick of LA thing. We’re all sick of it here, but we’re living it to the world like we love it…cos that’s what we do. We’re entertainers. Get off my drink.’

I don’t know why I went on that tangent? Brandon and I are still really good friends to this day. I remember that moment so vividly. I guess being a 20 something Angeleno wasn’t all it was cracked up to be at times. To be honest. I actually loved it. You could say i was made for it. Not because i was oh so ‘Hollywood.’ I was always a little girl from Yorkshire who had moved to the City of Angels, young..with nothing but an eye for stardom and a suitcase. I was made for that town because I was tough. Emotionally tough. I thank Hollywood for everything, because it sort of turned me into a solid adult.

I can’t even describe how great I feel today. I’m loving this blog, I’m whirled in opportunity, I’m loving being a mum, my love life isn’t rubbish, work is great, I’m settling in and settling down. I’m loving being a grown up. I look forward to being a wife one day, building a bigger family, feeling fulfilled and being happy. I’m counting all my blessings as they’re tinkering in and i couldn’t be more grateful for them.

Today I feel unstoppable.

So each time you fall…please promise me that you will AT LEAST TRY to get back up…..

 

 

 

 

 

The Bigger The Hoops, Love & Cocktails

Woke up this morning feeling not so snazzy. I think i’m gonna go with ROUGH. Yeah rough. I hated it. Feeling rough is just not me anymore. Lol.

I kinda just ran a bath, immersed myself in it, cosied my soul with a delicious bubbly comfort and then dried myself off, before opening ALL the windows, EVERY window in all of the land (I always need to feel free when i’m a pile of roughage) and then I just laid there, butt naked…still on my bed, on top of my flamingo sheets, with my eyes closed, as I let the coolest dancing breeze, slowly and sexily *whooooooosh* on in and tinker all over my rough kitten body. BLISS! It was fucking BLISS!

Junior was at his Dads, Ruby hadn’t got home from her holiday yet and there I was…doing life…butt naked on flamingo sheets, wondering why I had ventured out into Pontefract for drinks. Lol. I am far too old for such Tom Foolery. My body needs all kinds of a rest…and not ‘songs from the 90’s’ madness.

I woke up with a navy blue dot on my hand. It was done in felt tip. We all had one. This is what happened…I went to The Carleton, for ‘just one,’ as the saying goes. I was about to leave after my ‘just one,’ however, as I was getting my bag together, someone tapped me, I looked up and with a…

‘Hey yup…What you doing here…’

…everything turned from a ‘nothing’ to a shimmie.

It was Mel. She decided to smash a bit of ‘Bank Holiday’ Sunday with ‘Fairytale Blond,’ who had also arranged to meet up with ‘Hoops’ for a bit of a local razzle dazzle. Now, I hate going out in Pontefract. I hardly ever do it. I’ll do a village pub and enjoy it, but trendy little cocktail bars in Leeds is my forte. Such a forte now, that they invite me and pay me to show up at them, simply to cause glamourous blog havoc. And I love it. It’s the story telling afterward that I love the most.

Outside drinks where had in the sun, giggles, chats about our love lives….I think they tried to give me love life advice, yet I never listen to advice because I’m stubborn and secretly always know what i’m doing. Haha. I should probably take advice. (I never take advice. My gut instinct is too good.)

But i’m honest, so i’ll always tell the girls what I directly feel about something or anything really. Yet, it’s important to make sure you listen to advice, but then just do what you want, because I’m different to ‘Fairytale,’ who’s so different to Mel, who’s really different to ‘Hoops’ and well…. you get the conga line that i’m trying to form. And we all have different destinations in life.

The reason why i’m saying this is because later that evening ‘Hoops’ (who I adore) had a chat with me, in the dark, under the stars. She told me all these secrets about her own love life. The ‘oohs’ the ‘laa’s’ the naughty bits…and the bits inbetween. 😉 The time she’s going through kinda reminded me of my LA days, so like a magnet, my soul stood by hers.

Then we went back inside…(Oh we ended up getting a taxi into town, even though i tried to refuse the journey)…and after jugs of cocktails, more drinks, chitter chatter, packed bars, and really good times, with really good friends….(I love Fairytale, when she’s drunk, she just turns WILD!) But anyway, ‘Hoops’ decides she’s going to open up and tell everyone the story….Lol

‘Well I told Chrissie, because I knew she wouldn’t judge me…’

Ooh. I felt honoured. Everyone did a supportive *shocked* face. It was literally hilarious. I wasn’t necessarily shocked as ..well i’ve done a lot worse than that in my life. Lol. But I did scan the table and notice that, we as girls are pretty great because we’ll always tell you want you want to hear and wave the flag of support, even if it’s something we would never do ourselves. We’ll understand you and hold ya hand with ‘cocktail smiles.’ Sometimes you need that! It’s not always the best thing, yet sometimes you just need that.

Hoops: ‘The bigger the hoop the bigger the…’

Fairytale: ‘Willy?’

Hoops: ‘No…! Hoe! Hahaha.’

Me: ‘I love that she didn’t get that… I love drunk Fairytale! I love a big hoop! It’s ghetto fabulous.’

Fairytale: ‘Have you seen that granny at the bar….I want to be HER when i’m 80!!! She’s loving it. I AM her!!!’ When I’m 80, i’m gonna rock up to the bar.’

I look away…

Me: ‘Are you okay?’

Hoops: ‘I’m the HAPPIEST i have ever been.’

 Me: ‘Good just checking…Make sure you never let anyone judge you. All the lessons you’ll learn… you’ll learn. I lived a naughty one…and well i havent’ done too badly for myself. Lol. Just enjoy it.’

We all laughed. We all loved. We had moved to another pub by now. We were literally wallowing in rounds and rounds of drinks. Then Mel requested…’The Snake,’ which was much better that fucking Steps. (And I love a bit of Steps. Don’t get me wrong. I just wasn’t in the mood to Root Scooting baby’ it.) But i went with it anyway. Fuck it. I’m fun. I love a good song, a love a good dance. I am great on a night out. You can rely on that! I’m made for good times.

Cue song: (Just so you can feel like you were there. This was on in our background.)

Literally pub, to pub, to pub, to pub. Dance off with ‘Hoops.’ Love life chats with Mel and Selfies with ‘Fairytale.’

Fairytale: ‘Take a picture of me and Chrissie. Noooo…another one.’

Each time we left a pub I SWORE that I was going home. They MADE ME go to the next bar..honest!! They MADE ME.

‘You’re staying out Wunna!’

‘I just need to go home.’

‘No. Just come to one more pub..’

We all ended up with blue dots on our hands. That’s what happens when you stay out.

Mel: ‘What the fuck are these?’

They were literally the height of glamour. NOT! I can’t be a Glamour Puss and walk around with a felt tip dot on my hand.

It was such a good time. An accidental, spontaneous blow out. Which is odd, as i’m a girl who enjoys routine. I like to know what i’m doing and when i’m doing it…with a plan. But mainly because I grew up with my entire life scheduled. Even from being a kid, as I was getting pulled out of school to audition for this, model for that, do a dancing competition here, another audition there. Everything was a schedule. Then in LA, my job, acting and modelling…was all completely scheduled to a ‘T.’ It had to be.

Last night was so much fun!

‘Double B is gonna be so pissed off that she’s missed this!’

I left early…I left them all at the Tap & Barrel and some new Gin Bar. I know when i’m done and by then I was done. I needed a sleep and…well…just a sleep. However, during my walk to the cash machine to pull out money for the taxi, I just wanted to *blink* and be home! People kept shouting my name at me. Everyone was out…and I just remember waving at people I didn’t know, wishing that I was home. Hahaha. I’m great when surrounded by people, yet not necessarily when i’m drunk, tired and on my own. I like my bubble. I love Wunna Land. I love my own friends. But I did actually say ‘hello’ to everyone and took the time to chitter with them. I’m good like that. My manners are pretty decent. Even when knackered. I hate bad manners.

I finally got home…and within seconds, after  a bag of crisps, I fell asleep immediately. I could’ve slept in the taxi home, but weirdos were in it with me.

Good night.

My chick friends and I always seem to be there for one another…regardless….even as time passes. That’s what i’ll miss the most, as obviously i’m headed into a new chapter…which will sort of pluck me away from them…They’ll always be a major part of my life…Yet I guess I won’t see them as much. It happens all the time to me, so i’m used to it. Yet life is made of new chapters. I’ve lived so many that I know how important it is to embrace them. Everything happens for a reason. The people you meet, the situations you end up in. Even where you are. They’re important. They’re your ‘stop offs,’ the places where you need to be in order to learn something, before you get delivered to your HAPPY final destination…You might not know why you’re there or how you’re there…But you’re meant to be. You land there to gather a certain piece of life info. You do that at every stop. When you get to your final bit of forever…The last chapter of ‘happiness….’ you appreciate it so much more. You’ll find you’re in the right place, with the right person, doing the right kind of life.

So yeah, I might have felt like death but i’m actually fine now. It was worth it. I’ll feel better. I’ll recover and be right as rain. I’ve made memories…and I’ve ALSO managed to find my way to Ego in Ackworth to cushion my soul with the ‘hair of the dog.’ Yippeee.

‘I need a Fosters. I’m rough.’

To be fair…I’ve done an interview AND A SHOOT this morning. ‘Ego Hannah’ is currently making a ‘Game of Thrones’ themed cocktail and i’m sat at the bar with my pink laptop on my knee…blogging…by a half of Fosters, watching strangers order Pornstar Martinis. (I’ve got really into drinking a Foster’s now. I’d usually Bloody Mary it to recover. But now it’s all about a Foster’s recovery. I still prefer a Bloody Mary, don’t be getting it twisted.)

Wait…They’re making me look at a drawing of a dragon, on a chalkboard….Lol. One second…..

Luca: ‘I love Game of Thrones…It’s all tits and dragons..’

I will tell you that last night before all the madness shimmied my way, I remember sitting at the The Carleton which the girls sat around me and sending a message to ‘The Swirl.’ I think about him a lot. All the time, to be honest. I can’t get him out of my head. It’s a happy ‘lull’ that I feel for him. I can’t really help it. It’s something that’s been built upon and it’s well balanced. It’s a bit of everything…it can be wild, general, loving, funny, sexy, work mode or just normal.

All I sent was…

‘Thinking about you…’

He replied quickly with ‘Kissy Face‘ emojis.

Then i got back to the girls, who would have no clue that I ever sent anyone a message. Lol.

That was our check in. We’d chatted through the day. But that was when we were we zapped out of current worlds, just for a moment, to check into each others….

Thanks for following my life…

Your Questions & Answers

Q: Are you Thai?

A: No, I’m Burmese. But good guess. I always say people are either from the sophisticated part of Asian where they do skyscraper business, play violins and invent ipods. I’m from the slutty part of Asian, where it’s all golden palaces, magic and lagoons.

Q: Worst thing that’s ever happened to you on a date?

A: I could write a book on this. Once this weird guy tried to feel me up on display furniture in LA. He said he wanted to ‘spit in my mouth’ too! Haha! I had to get my guy roommate to show up and pretend he was my boyfriend. That was on a first and last date. Another time I got thrown across an entire Mexican restaurant Lol…I’m laughing but it was actually awful. Funny cos we’re good friends now. That night I accessorised with a blood stained clutch. Another time I got stood up…and that by far was the worse….Just chilling…on my own…on what looked like my PRETEND date….lol. TRAGIC.

Q: You’ve been pretty successful so far…How successful are you hoping to be?

A: I’m ambitious and driven. I want to be the hugest success in my ‘niche,’.. EVER. I want to smash it! Glamourously ofcourse….

Q: Is being a mum of two hard, when there’s just you?

A: It’s been great so far. Yeah, ofcourse it’s not easy but I have so much help and our world ‘Wunna Land’ as we call it … is filled with so much love that i’m really lucky. If anything it’s made me more organized, more determined…and made me feel like i have a purpose. It keeps me young, shows me what love is, helped the wine industry threefold and made me grow up…..fast. J

Q: What couldn’t you live without?

A: Family. Music. Love

Q: Worst physical feature?

A: My Feet. I hate them. I hate feet. They’re weird.

Q: What are you scared of?

A: Crossing roads. Sounds loopy. But honestly, I’m terrified. I once got run over outside Sushi Roku in West Hollywood. I weirdly just got back up, giggled and walked on. I remember looking at the guy, who had rushed out of his car, after hitting into me. He had his baby daughter in the car….He turned white with shock and was shaking. It made me feel bad for him, so I just looked up, got up and said ‘I’m fine, don’t worry’ and walked on. IT FUCKING KILLED. I flashback it whenever I cross a road.

Q: How will you know if you have found your Mr.Right?

A: You know when you know. I’ve had loads of experience at Mr.Wrongs. I’m thirty six. I know what i’m doing these days. J With me it’s always a chemistry, a friendship, a lover, someone who sees the world through the same eyes, a family man, someone who can stand the test of time and a real man who knows how to love a woman.

Q: If you could go back in time and be anything what would it be?

A: A Spice Girl .

Q: Favourite colour?

A: Was yellow, now it’s pink

Q: Motto you live by?

A: That dreams come true…

Q: Reality show you’d most like to be on?

A: Strictly Come Dancing. God! I’d love it. Plus, I’d feel challenged so I’d work hard at it. I already have loads of experience in bantery reality tv…I find it easy, so I’d like to be put through my paces, so to speak.

Q: Everyone says you’ve written the new ‘Sex And The City?’ How does that make you feel?

A: Yeah, I love it. I’m currently be hailed the UK’s Carrie Bradshaw. I read that in an article. It’s obviously amazing, such an honour and such a shock. One of my favourite shows of all time. So well written. If ‘Sex And The City’ & ‘The Bridget Jones Diary’..had a baby…it would be chrissiewunna.com.

Q: Weaknesses?

A: I love a cocktail far too much.

Q: Strengths?

A: I’m great at making people feel good. I’m also great when it comes to BIG LIFE PROBLEMS. I handle them with ease. I’m also totally non judgemental, you can literally tell me anything and i’ll understand you.

Q: Before the modelling, the blogging…the TV shows….what was your background?

A: I have a back ground in PR and I was a talent agent. I’ve been an Elf at a Grotto. A receptionist. All sorts. Before that the BEST JOB I HONESTLY EVER HAD was being the ‘Meet & Greet’ girl at Crunch Gym on Sunset in West Hollywood. I loved it. I’d go back and do it today….

Q: One of the girls or one of the guys?

A: Definitely one of the girls. I have the best chick friends. I love them more than they know. Plus, they always let me write about them, and I heart them for that! Haha. Saying that, i’m quite happy to kick it with the guys. My sense of humour is boyish. I have loads of guy friends.

Q: Do you still go clubbing?

A: No. I love a cocktail bar but I never enjoy heading to a club now that i’m an oldie. I’m really really social, so i love going out, yet i’m never at a club until 8am unless it’s a really special occasion.

Q: Your favourite genre of modelling?

A: Pin up/Boudior easy! I love all the ‘Old Hollywood’ glamourous pin up shoots. They’re dripping with decadence. They’re divine. I see so much beauty in them.

Q: What made you want to be a glamour model?

A: I don’t even know? I was just sat at a coffee shop in LA and got scouted and i thought it would be a good way to make money.That’s how it happened. Yet, stemming back into my childhood, I remember by Dad always used to have the annual Page 3 calendar and he loved the girls on it. (My mum was always cool with it. Lol) It kinda installed in my subconscious that they were the most beautiful girls in the world, whether they were or not, and simply because my Dad loved them. Hahaha.

Q: Would you let Ruby be a Glamour Model?

A: Absolutely not! It’s a no go. If she chose to be a lingerie model when she was older, then that’s fine, but nothing more than that. I’d be fuming. I’ve worked really hard all my life in order to provide for both children, meaning Ruby wouldn’t need to consider that as a job option. 🙂 I grew up needing to make money. She has the opposite case scenario. I’ve lived that life….and well it’s not something that I’d necessarily want her to go through. (I went on a rant then. Lol)

Q: Your relationship with the art of Attention?

A: I’m an attention whore. I’m not gonna lie to you and pretend i’m not. I love really peaceful moments, when i want peaceful moments, but only because I know ‘Wunna’ attention is going on somewhere. It’s a bad habit. But in the industry that I grew up in…if you didn’t gain the most attention you didn’t work. It mattered. Now with the blog, attention to it is vital because it’s become a business. Yet, i’m quite loyal to my morals so i’d never just do anything for a tiny bit of ‘look of me.’ I see that as ‘young.’ There’s a fun classiness to the 30 something version of me.

Q: Your idols?

A: My parents. They both did so well and started with nothing. They’ve kinda accidentally made me attracted to successful humans. I am so inspired by all successful people. I have so much respect for how much they’ve worked to get where they are. It’s not easy. They just make it look easy.

Q: Why do you love your blog?

A: I’ve documented my life daily for years. When i’m 80 years old, i’ll be able to look back on my time on this Earth and relive it all. I’ll cry into my brandy. (I hate brandy.)

Q: In your blog you give everyone fake names….are they real people? Why do you use fake names, if everything is so real?

A: Firmonnel, Fairytale, Double B, Hustle Barbie, The Swirl, Eton Mess etc…all of them are real people. They’re people who I have in my life daily, they’re not made up. I use ‘label names’ because as humans they’re entitled to their own privacy. Plus, I can freely write about them under their ‘alias names’ which keeps it ‘sexy’ and mysterious. I know who they are. They know you they are. To you…they could be anyone. It’s magical like a sassy fairytale. I hate it when people don’t think they’re all real humans and real stories….but only because I know that they are. I told you. I leave more out of my blog than I put in. So much more happens. I wouldn’t even dare tell you.

Q: Are you confident?

A: yes

Q: Are you insecure?

A: Yes..ofcourse

Q: Are you the girl who has everything?

A: No, I wish.

Q: In love you are…

A: Alive. I’m a hopeless romantic. I’m funny with it though. Not lame. Well…a bit lame.

Q: I take it you’re making a comeback….How is 2018 looking for you?

A: Well if all goes accordingly…wonderfully. Lol. I can’t even believe how well it’s all going right now. Opportunity kinda sprung up at me, out of nowhere…at the end of LAST year, something changed in me…I sorted myself out and worked really hard. Something happened that made me see life differently. I grew 10 ft tall.

Q: Life is…

A: To be enjoyed…I want everyone to find their ‘happy’ because at the end of the day, that’s all that matters.

Q: It’s important to…

A: Be grateful for all that you have and where you currently are in life. You might not have tomorrow, so appreciating your current situation is important, as you are exactly where you’re meant to be and there’s definitely something positive going on in your life, even if you can’t see it. There’s a magic in the air. Some people are so blinded by what they don’t have, that they forget to see and maybe take for granted the things that they do have. It’s a bad habit.

 

 

 

Love, Loyalty & Bunny Tail Thongs

I don’t know how i ended up with my bunny tail thong in my handbag? But i did! (Do note, it is MY bunny tail thong, that I gained from Ann Summers, when they sent me boxes of free things and not the random bunny tail thong of another, that just so creepily happened to be in my handbag. ) However, ofcourse when you have a bunny tail thong in your handbag, you kinda don’t ever want it to just pop out whenever it pleases…as surely it’s just for happy private sexy moments…when you want to be a ‘bunny’ in the bedroom??? Don’t ask. (I’ve only worn it once for picture taking purposes, maybe in the Spring? That picture was sent to a ‘heart throb’…I scored major points. Lol) Anyway…I pulled out my pink ‘Ted Baker’ purse, which was again gifted to me (i’m a bit over it now and need a new one) to pay for..what was it now? Oh GOD! A Blue ‘Push Pop’ for my Baby Ruby and somehow during the glide from my handbag to the open air, it managed to swirl it’s way around my wrist, get entangled within straps and nails and beautifully flick itself onto the counter. Hahaha.

WHY AM I SO EMBARRASING!!!

And to make it worse…the guy at the counter, blushed, fidgeted awkwardly and uncomfortably pretended it wasn’t there. Lol. To me, that’s the worst thing you can do, as i hate awkward moments where things are swept under the rug like they’re not even happening. So, being the unnecessary tool that I am, an ever expressive soul and to firstly break the awkwardness and to try and make him at least feel a little bit better…I just kinda blurted out..

‘Sorry…they’re my pants!’

(AS AND ORDERLY LINE WAITIED BEHIND ME. I don’t know why i thought that would make him feel better. I just thought went with honesty is the best policy? )

He *paused* took my money, still pretended it wasn’t happening, which kinda made me feel rejected. Haha. Then FINALLY, he cracked a tiny Yorkshire smile…and BOOM, life and normality was restored. How did it even get in my bag? Bunny tail thongs must have a life of their own? They’re magic. AND I have noticed that I must never learn lessons, because it’s still in my handbag right now…chilling…waiting for its next appearance, because I keep forgetting to take it out! Learn things the hard way much!

I have a last minute shoot today, that I wasn’t going to go on just yet, but ended up going on in the end simply to bundle all my work into one big ‘yeehaa.’ It’s throwing it down with rain and even though i hate the rain when travelling about…(I love it warm) I’m excited because it will soon be flippin’ Christmas, which is my FAVOURITE TIME OF YEAR! I love the smell of it, the warmth of it, the merriment, the tinsel and the fact that I have a birthday a week before Santa comes. I was meant to be born on Christmas Day, but my mum made them pull me out early because she hated the idea of a Christmas Day labour. Some of you pulled crackers, my mother had a human pulled out of her….EARLY.

I love my Parents. They’re Great! My dad taught me to dream (he’s really creative) and my mum taught me how to turn a dream into a reality. (She’s really practical.) There was a time in my 20’s when I had kinda brought a lot of attention to myself, it was all TV, modelling and all kinds of good and bad press…and during it…they stood by me whole heartedly, strong has bulls…having private talks with me, in support and at the same time as refusing to comment on anything when harassed by others who we didn’t want interfering with my life. The only things she ever said openly to someone who had said something quite derogatory about me, was this…

‘When YOU’RE seeing her as a product, I’m letting you know she’s my daughter. She’s human. I’ll love and protect her until the day she dies. I raised her to be able to handle anything…she can and she does….’

I always remember that.

The best and worst thing about that statement is that I see every inch of Me in Ruby and automatically I have gone into protection mode, to the point where it’s a bit silly. I mean, obviously now ‘The Wunna Babies’ receive offers of all sorts and I go out of my way to turn them all down, just so they start life in a normal loving fashion. They can do charity work, or childrens brands, but away from that…it’s a ‘No.’ Ruby asks me every morning if she can model, start a Vlog, sign up to some show…(I didn’t let her do ‘Secret Lives of Five year olds Lol) and I don’t know if i’m doing the right thing or wrong thing, yet as a parent…I don’t think being six is a good time to venture into entertainment, which is a very adult world. I mean even some adults don’t understand how the world of entertainment works…let alone children..and whilst i’m still working, I wouldn’t be able to be around 24/7 to make sure she’s okay and I would need to be. She hates me for it at times, but trusts me. Lol. It’s my loyalty to her.

I’ve got the heart of a lion and when it comes to love and loyalty, be it within family or romantically…I am great at standing right by, anyone I care about’s side, when they need me the most. I look for that in partners. I find it attractive. Loyalty is HUGE with me. It’s a big old thing. If you can’t be loyal to someone you care about, then you’re weak…and during my time in LA, I knew that I had  to partner up with the strongest man alive.

Ahhh! I’ve just got an instagram message from one of my best chick friends ‘Greedy.’ I miss her madly. She’s trying to be a nurse, whilst watching me be a Glamour Puss. It’s good times. I have the funniest memories with ‘Greedy.’ I really shouldn’t call her that. Haha. Her name is actually ‘Danielle.’ I’m glad her love life isn’t rubbish now. We’d spend hours muddling through it whilst she pondered dessert. She was dating this idiot who she loved madly, but he cheated on her with his ex. She forgave him out of love…and they got back together. Then he cheated on her again…with his ex. Lol. What I love about her is the fact that she felt it all really quickly and cried it out madly, but never ever let it tarnish her faith in love or herself. She’s happy now…with a great guy. BOOM! We have a really honest relationship..another thing that I love in friendships.

Ooh, it’s stopped raining…

See ya! I’m off.

 

 

Boys, Emojis & Fire Talk

Y’know when you just can’t find your way out of a fricking carpark!! No? Just me then. 😉 FFS.

Lord knows what happened, but I got into the carpark with a shimmie, hair toss and maybe even a wink….yet getting out the fucker was like some kind of comedically trippy maze. I drove round and round, up and down, parked up, waved at concerned people, like I totally knew what I was doing, pondered, adjusted my bra, glossed my lips and finally after about 17 minutes, I found my way out. 🙂 Welcome to my world. I’ll definitely make someone a good wife one day. I CAN’T EVEN GET OUT OF CARPARKS. (However, do note, there are other things i CAN DO and well…so bare with me.)

Life is great otherwise. Ruby, Junior and I have a new kitten, after many name changes (Sammi/Beckham/Harry/Sprint…) and after I felt bad from taking it from a weeping child,

Mel: ‘Chrissie…just leave with the kitten. Take it…NOW.’

… we finally all agreed on ROCCO. So Baby Rocco, full name ‘Rocco RoMEo’ is our new kitty addition. Hurrah! He’s amazing. We love him. (We don’t know how to look after pets, so it will be a challenge. I mean how hard can it be? I raised two humans on my own.)

But yes, I’ve been a busy glamour puss, but a chilled one all at the same time. I’ve nothing too hardcore other than posing and pouting for a camera to endure, after a stint of secret filming…until the 21st…so i’m just enjoying the downtown…until i have to step it all up and write a book and tend to a lash line relaunch.. without wine.

I had a chat with my guy friend ‘Marbles’ the other day…and it’s weird how men think? We’re wired so differently….He adores this girl…that he kinda knows…and well this is how our convo went down..

Me: ‘So you fancy her, she’s single, but you’re not gonna tell her?’

Marbles: ‘Yes.’

Me: ‘Hmm…? I can see how that works? NOT! Lol. Girls hate that. We want you to be all masterful..well brave..It makes us feel femme…all of us want some hero, you know that. What was the last message you sent her?’

Marbles: ‘A thumbs up emoji. Lol. And Nah. She might turn me down…I’m flirty but she’s way out of my league…’

WHAT!!! WHAT IS GOING ON? WHAT IS HAPPENING TO MEN! We’ve terrified them. There isn’t leagues. (Well maybe there are leagues.) But there isn’t any leagues. Lol. Nothing is hotter than being brave and expressive regardless. A ‘thumbs up’ emoji is odd to a girl. To us, it means you either didn’t know what to say, didn’t have time to say or even worse couldn’t be bothered to say…

You have one life to live, one honey to woo, a wifey to maybe commit to in the end. And I do know that ‘steady treading’ is always very sensible, as I do believe that the guy or girl that stands the test of time, is one that is worth all your love, if you fancy them and they have a snuggled a cosy spot in your heart.

Yet love isn’t sensible, it’s an emotion, it’s not something that calculated logically. It’s something you feel and can’t help but feel, even if you’ve going through a bumpy run or an easy peasy ‘slip n slide.’ I’m always expressive, too expressive…so expressive, that I have zero qualms or fear when it comes to  delivering how I feel about anyone or anything…it’s how I’M wired. It makes me a good blogger and a decent telly personality. 😉 Yet, it’s just struck me that some people are quite willing to forget that they one shot to ‘go for it’ and instead will go for ‘nah, she’s out of my league.’ EH?

Then ‘Marbles’ (and i’m referring to him as that because he’s certainly lost his) went on to say…

‘Like you. Wunna land is a pretty daunting place to approach..’

Me: ‘No, it’s not, not if you have your OWN LAND going on. Then you’re comfy, you feel all confident. It’s normal. I hate it when people are daunted by Wunna land because it makes me feel like they’ve judged me. Aww no. It’s not me is it? HAHAHA… I’m not your Woo Woo am I…cos I don’t..’

Marbles: ‘Hahah…Nope you big headed bitch. Lol. Men aren’t like that. We’re always a bit sketchy, until we fall head over heels and that happens when we know we can trust the girl. When we feel safe.’

Me: ‘That sounds very girly to me. It’s like a Backstreet boys track. Yeah she might not fancy you, but you’ll know if she does….she’ll tell you, or even better show you… YEEeeeah!’

Marbles: ‘I hope you die an old lonely cat lady…’

Me: ‘Hahahaha. Not only did my friend Kate TELL ME that i now have a Cat Lady starter pack with Rocco, but fuck you because my love life isn’t even that shit right now. 😉 ‘

Marbles: ‘You’re in a swirl…’

Me: ‘It’s pretty good. Infact so good that I might need a wine to celebrate…’

At the end of the day, you work hard, you play hard and well you’ve kinda just godda have that good old faith in love. If someone adores you, no matter what, where or how, they will always still be stood there..even when the mist has risen. If not, you’re sat in your tight t shirt playing the ‘shoulda woulda coulda‘ game (which is shit) or crying into your Louboutin wearing fruity gin sessions. Faith in love (without you realizing) gets you through shit and I MEAN IT. I mean god my time in LA was so emotionally INSANE that it was almost a work of art. I was happy through it and I sailed it with flying colours unscathed. It was only when I got back home to Yorkshire, did a tv show with Hilton, looked back and reflected on LA and thought shit, how the absolute hell did I get through all that smiling. But I did. And yeah I might be thirty six now…and yeah i’ve shimmied with the best…but let me tell you i have NEVER in my entire life felt as empowered and I do now.

The time i’m going through right now is probably the best time of my entire life…and that’s saying something. Like I don’t have to look back and hold onto my ‘misty watercolours’ wistfully as i’m currently SMASHING IT. Someone close to me always whatsapps me and says, ‘You’re on fire, babe’ and makes me feel good because I never would have imagined it.  Y’know, a lot of hard work, glitter and ‘fingers crossed’ has gone into this year and it will continue until the end of the year. I’ve kinda winged it. But i’ve done it. I’m doing it. You can do anything. Remember that! Just go for it. If people don’t like it, fuck’em.

On the whole…I’m buzzing…and not even needing to do it in a Wonderbra and anytime that happens you know you’re winning at life.

Ps/ I’m up for Blogger/Podcaster of the year for the Diversity in Media awards…I kinda wished i tried harder to make everyone vote for me now. Voting has closed and I tinker to the event in September. There’s hit loads of people up for awards like Graham Norton, Rio Ferdinand…some other folk…I keep needing to blink and think and realize that life is all ace!