Pink Pens, Dance Offs & Girls

G: ‘I’m just a bit distracted because someone’s stole my pink pen?’

Me: ‘I stole A pink pen, but it’s mine now…’

Fairytale Blond: ‘I just found a pink pen in my drawer….’

Pink Pen Purchaser: ‘I have loads of pink pens here….’ *Opens drawer.*

Me: ‘Nooo….That’s how we all have them….We stole them out of your drawer.’

See, it’s the littlest things that mean so much to a girl. Pens that write pink. As simple as that. The most sought after pen on the block. (Listen to this bit Gents…) It looks good. It writes well. It caters to our everyday girly whims…We’re so subconsciously obsessed with these pink pens, that WE STEAL THEM from one another.

It means so much to one girl that she will question it’s whereabouts. Another is so polite that she will simply state that one seemed to have accidentally landed in her personal space. I simply made it clear that I had found one, liked it, stole it and therefore it was now mine. 🙂 And inbetween the casual pink pen debate, there was a ‘giver,’ the girl who thought there were more in supply, having not yet noticed that they had all been stolen. 🙂

That’s kinda how life and being a female works, as soon as guys learn it and learn more about the type of ‘pink pen’ chick he is dealing with…the more successful he will become in the pursuit of winning her heart.

I’ll just leave that piece of ‘juicy’ there for you.

Anyway, i’ve had a busy day. Monday’s are always busy aren’t they? And you can either decide to hide from it, deal with it, or just go with it and get drunk afterward. I’m not quite sure which one I did? But i started early and finished late and still didn’t managed to get everything done. Yipppee! Lol.

I also had a working lunch, where I found myself running (well, I don’t really run do I? I sort of slowly tottered up three flights of stairs as glamourously as I could, with my flipping waist trainer on and my pink laptop under my arm?

*I swing the door open.*

‘You’re not actually gonna blog through your lunch are you?’

‘No. I’ve just godda get these interview questions done and I’m not gonna have the time.’

‘When do they have to be in for?’


Then ‘Firmonnell’ and Mel chipped in as we all conferred and discussed how WE EACH believed a first date should run. (This is why you need your chick friends. Mine are more than helpful when it comes to Wunna land.)

Now we’re really different from one another and all in three different situations. ‘Firmonnells’ married. Mel has a brand new ‘love swirl’ and I’m completely and utterly single. We all like different things in men. Will make different date choices. BUT, after a table chitter chatter, as we overlooked the town, behind a giant glass window, in the middle of our day of business…I actually realised that when to comes to a FIRST DATE, WE ALL WANTED THE EXACT SAME THING and it had nothing to do with the type of guy. Nothing to do with what he’d look like, or how much a date would cost, or where we’d go….?It had nothing to do with the any of the superficial bits of a ‘first date’ and had everything to do with his manner….How thoughtful and creative he would or could be…..SO THOUGHTFUL and I say it all the time, is the new sexy…Yet only to the girls who are emotionally grown.

I can’t tell you anything more about the conversation, as well…you’ll be able to read my answers in the digital feature when it comes out.

We got so engrossed in talking about it, that I only answers ONE of the questions, so I have the rest to do now. But i’m excited because at least everything i’m saying is real and true to what I honestly believe. It’s always based upon my own life experience and not some well PR’d drivel. I do always ask others about their own opinions and life experience, but so I can see something from every angle. Teams are better than going it solo. If your ream is correct. be it in love or business. (I say that ALL the time also.)

Anyway, ‘Firmonnell’ had to dash off after we chatted about Valentines Day cards..

Mel: ‘Is there a card that just says I LIKE YOU? Y’know, so I don’t have to do the whole I LOVE YOU thing?’ 

Firmonnell: ‘I’d really like an I LIKE YOU card. It’s hilarious. You know that there’s now a dating site, where you find your perfect life partner by matching ALL the things you HATE? We’d be good at that!’


Then as Firmonnell swung out the door, Mel and I discussed the ‘Chrissie Wunna’ brand. (I’m single. Have I told you that i’m single? Lol. So, I don’t have to fuss over the whole what ‘valentines card do i buy’ muddle. I can just buy myself a cocktail and wink at my own mirror image. 🙂 I’m fine with that because Cupid is quite obviously a twat OR saving me for something awesome? See, how I tried to be positive then…Lol.)

But yes, obviously this whole ‘Chrissie Wunna’ thing is turning into a brand…by accident and like i’ve said, there’s opportunities a knocking always, yet for me finding the correct team to work alongside when it comes to brand management, isn’t easy. I’ve had investors ask to meet me and I like that they sort of believe in ‘this little girls’ blog and think that i’m onto something great. That makes me feel warm…

So Mel and I discussed paperwork, business deals and futures…

Then I don’t know what happened, but we then decided, whilst boiling a kettle, that instead of having a bunch of business types and solicitors fight over or *barter/back & forth* it into Wunna land, we should just gather them ALL into a room and make them have a DANCE OFF. Haha.

Whoever wins, gets Wunna Land. Deal Done!

YES! I totally know geniuses. I’m sold. I Love it! I’m in! Yes to ‘The Robot.’

Then we realized that time had got the better of us and had to get back to work…

That door swung straight back open and we dashed out, with a tea and a phone in our hands, to make good shit happen….

The day flew….but I remember hours late, as I had flounced on my ‘Little Mistress’ faux fur and grabbed my bag, ‘G’ was stood at the top of first flight of stairs…

I absorbed it all really quickly, as I had to dash off madly, but she looked down the flight of stairs at ‘Fairytale Blond, who was sat down working, and with the biggest smirk on her face, she twizzled a pink pen, that she effectively stole and with a warmth of evil victory, simply said,

‘Look what I’ve got…’

Shoulda Pudda…


I’m feeling really good today. Really good! I’m dazzled with light and life and swirling around in a magic that only a glittery magic could champion. I’m bubbling over with ‘joie de vivre’ and totally enjoying all the male models that I have going on, on my Facebook newsfeed.

I mean Gosh…Look at Tommy Maxwell…

and…Fran Murcia…

What is better than waking up on a Wednesday morning and having a newsfeed filled with eye candy! Lol.

I like the Tommy Maxwell pics A LOT! 🙂 He liked TWO of mine! Boom! HAHAHA. I love being a girl. We’re idiots! It’s just fun isn’t it though! 🙂

So, yeah a lot is happening right now. I went through it all last night, couldn’t sleep, emptied it all out and now i feel FABULOUS! I couldn’t feel better if i tried. I think sometimes we just need to get it all out and get back to ‘one’ in order to *victory air punch* and find our sense of fun again. Life is about fun and love! Enjoy it. (You miserable sods!)

I must be feeling odd though, as i nearly took up running this morning. Don’t worry..I stopped myself. I know i’m not fit enough to dare try. And i only stop myself because I saw photos of Victoria the Marathon running, doll of London’s toenails drop off….from running. That was me done. I miss Vicky…(I’ve never called her ‘Vicky’ before. If i could run, the way she could run…i’d be a happy chicken. I think there needs to be gin at the finish line…or a…pervert at the start. 🙂 )

I’m looking forward to Friday evening. I’ve had to reschedule all my botox and teeth whitening because i couldn’t find cover. (You’re all evil. I’m when i’m reschduling youth…you’re dead.) I’m loving my workmate Natalie in a tight bun. She’s struts like she’s ‘all that’ and ofcourse being ‘all that’ is my favourite. I’m missing Lydia…but i’ll see her pissed on Friday. I have a shoot booked and I start new things on Monday.

It’s hump day! I’m on DOSS mode…I love it!

I keep getting these messages from young girls who are all forlorn hen it comes to boys and dating. DO know that all single boys, are usually chatting to looooooooooaaaaads of girls. or more than one…depending on the opportunity that the God Lord has given them. I never know why girls are alarmed by that? Expect that! They’ll have a faourite girl, who is either talking back at them, or ignoring them…or whatever…some that just pass the time…But if they like you…they’ll come get you. Don’t chase them. We’re women, we’re girls…we don’t do that.

If you are doing that (a ‘green light’ is fine)…then you are doing it all wrong! Don’t let a man, make like a girl. 🙂 It is THEIR JOB to chase you and make you their ‘one and only’…. if they wish to. If they don’t…then it’s there fault. 🙂 They weren’t ready emotionally. But don’t be alarmed if a guy is talking to  bunch of chicks…it’s what they do. It doesn’t men they don’t like you…PLUS, if we do it…it’s okay? HAHA.

Don’t sell yourself short…don’t be stupid…but at the same time be open minded and loving. Be warm…true to yourself and happy.

Preach over…

Have a boogie..





Last Night, Respect & Boys


Worked all  day, which was fun but oddly difficult, seen as I’m on this utter and complete mode of ‘I only have to do this 7 more times’ doss! I’m silly by nature. Naughty by nature…for humour and innocent, playful kicks…not for the bad of mankind. I’m far too lazy to be evil. It’s takes too much squinting and really…as we know, it totally gives you wrinkles. I’m actually a pretty decent gal, which again shocks people magnificently. LOL. (The package is good. A guy once described me as that, in Hollywood, whilst we were sat in some black car.) However, yes…when it comes to work and when it comes to bowing out gracefully from one chapter and strutting through that glass revolving door, into a new chapter, in pinstripes…your fingers crossed and an excited, yet sassy smile in your eyes…you’ve just got to let your bun out and have some fun for the last few pages. (My boobs are feeling funny? It’s Tuesday night. I’m sat blogging braless on my sofa…and i’m definitely needing a boob top me up. They’ve gone normal after babies.)

Simple day. Fun banter with Chloe about boys. Still have hurting calves from wearing heels all Saturday, meant to be planning a leaving do and thanking God for this Mojito in a can. I’m feeling like i want to prank people, but i can’t. I NEED A MASSAGE. I mean GOD, everyone wants to fly me out to Bermuda and all sorts…but no one wants to treat me to a fricking rub down. Lol. I would literally let anyone, even your pervy Uncle, rub me down at this point. Massages are a Godsend and i used to have them every week. The reason why i find them so sexy is not simply because they are therapeutic…y’know and they keep your blood circulating. BUT when a guy…a guy? Lol. A someone…anyone…(apart from that evil Chinese woman in Camden, London, who broke every bone in my body to calming pan pipe music lol..bitch)…yes…anyway…when a being touches your skin and beings to massage an area of your body, ALL the nerve endings in your body, directly under the palm that is massaging you, come ALIVE! Hoe sexy is that! Hoe? HOW!! You can tell i’m sexually frustrated!! HAHA. I find that exhilarating.

I need that….now.

So yeah, pay for a video message from me, a this, a that, a flight to Bermuda…or just don’t and instead massage me…pronto…and bring a skinny cappuccino with you ‘bitch.’ 🙂 (Private joke.)

It’s life simple pleasures that I enjoy…and diamonds. 😉 I enjoy simple with extravagant luxury. LOl. It’s  tough one.

Got new nails, they’re amazing. Life is good! I spent the evening chatting to Cloughey the evening before last. (I don’t know why people are in a huff about that, as surely we as humans can chitter to anyone we choose? Lol. Well i can anyway. I’m a swine for doing what i think is right for me. But shouldn’t everyone!!! I’m good at listening. But good at taking advice…when i respect the person. If i don’t respect you…i’ll just do my thang…but still politely listen, nod and smile. 🙂 Quite rude actually. HAHAH. That’s how Ben, Keiran…all of them lost their fight with me…when i stopped respecting them….even though i totally respect Keiran now. Yet years have passed. We’re tight now!)

All was well and we were about to plonk cherries on it all..then I drove to the local car garage, Autoserve in Ackworth, (Love James) to get air pumped into my tyre. (He gets that i’m a bimbo when it comes to car knowledge. He respects me for that, with a ‘you’re just a girl’s girl,’ and he gets on with fixing my car. There’s no point in him telling me the car jargon, as i’ll just blank stare him and he knows it.) Anyway, he pumped air into my tyres…I booked to buy two new ones for tomorrow. I realized that i had run out of petrol. I drive to the nearest petrol pump and ‘BOOM,’ with a ‘WHAT THE FUCK WAS THAT,’ from a guy.. stood pumping fuel on the other side of life 😉 …my tyre burst!

I ended up having to make Autoserve come get it, love it, nurture it and do me new wheels tomorrow whilst i’m at work…and drop it off. I went to The Angle to have a wine, as I waited for my Mum to pick me up. The Angel’s lovely. I haven’t been there in ages. I must go lunch there sometime. I’m such an ‘Ego’ whore. (As in the restaurant…and not my massive head.)

All my LA friends are making me jealous, as they’re snapchatting their lives at me. They all also have no clue as to why i’m even single? I’m on little news comments, blogs, feeds and radio stations…because i’m single. At least they don’t get why and are blaming it on the UK boys. 🙂 HAHAH. Could be worse!

I know exactly what i’m looking for in a guy and i know when i’ve found it and when i haven’t. And i also believe in not changing a human to fit your ways and letting them be them…you’d love them regardless, right?

Guys are now offering to pay me to take me out on dates? I have an ‘i’m ignoring them’ inbox full. Save your dosh. If i don’t fancy you, i won’t go on one. If i do..then i’ll chat to you about everything and meet up with you when i should. I’m too lazy to chat to a hundred boys at a time. I can’t be arsed. I need a connection and i think i’ve found one? Plus, even though you’re not doing it rudely…i’m not escorty at all. I want to find the man of my dreams here…Innit! You’re meant o come striding in with all Knight like and romantic…not with a boner and a wallet. (Does help though. HAHAA.)

I have the whole weekend off and i can’t wait.

Right, back to bed with the babies…They’re both in mine, after the ‘double bangs’ last night. They’re terrified. I have great kids. Ruby’s a mini me. She’s a tough cookie, but filled with love. Junior’s the playful version of me…he’s soooo kind and filled with laughter. For example, the other day when both Dads brought them into my work…Ruby said, ‘Look at all this stuff that I got Daddy to buy me!!!’ Junior saw me carrying a bunch of breakable things at once and said, ‘Daddy, let’s help her carry them.’ 🙂

Single mummying rocks!







Happn Fears & What I want from a Guy


‘Happn,’ is driving me nuts. I’m already having to maybe delete it  and it’s the only dating site that i’m flipping on!! I’m doomed. If you don’t know what it is, it’s a dating site that finds the people that you’ve immediately crossed paths with, helping you to find singles within a 200m radius! In Pontefract, there really are rubbish options. Firstly not that many are really bothered about ‘Happn’ as it’s more of a big city bustly thing. In Doncaster there’s better choices, yet i’m always near a train station, so my suitors are usually from somewhere else but about to board the next train to London or something? I can’t love for them running off.

The terrifying thing about it this particular site, is the fact that if someone, a guy, a girl.. likes you they will send you a charm. That’s nice if you like them, but if you don’t you better have your running shoes on, and start legging it, as they could literally be right next to you in the queue, the next store, on the same train as you…I’m too much of a ‘Puss’ to run. I’m in heels.  (I just wanted to take this moment to say WELL DONE TO MY GIRL GOD VICTORIA for running the London Marathon! Her selfies after that run were amazing! No one looks that good after running that far!! She’s hot! And even got her lashes and tan done for the run! HAHAHA. I adore her! What an achievement. I can’t even run away from strangers from a dating site and look good…let alone in booty shorts and on a televised running show.)

But yes, Happn is not being good to me. It’s like my inbox…a Willy Wonka factory of Boners. I mean there’s even TEENAGERS ON THERE and i’m flipping a hundred years old. I don’t date teenagers….on Wednesdays! Or unless i’m drunk at Biggies! Please!

I mean GOD, even Tony (who’s my friend anyway) was on my list of suitors..shirtless!!! Lol. He’s everywhere…on every site going…he’s currently on the *prowl* …even Tinder has run out of ‘girls in his area’ for him to swipe…HAHAHA. It’s actually a shame as he’s a really great guy… I love Tony, but for me, when he’s your best Pontefract suitor…and you know him already….you’re fucked. And I hate to say it, as it will inflate his ego tenfold…but out of my area options…he was actually the best looking one.


Victoria did tell me that I wasn’t going to find the man of my dreams here. Awesome! *Weeps.* Lol.  So like i said, i’m sitting pretty and letting ‘the flow’ of life happen naturally. I’m happy and i’m positiive that happy people find all sorts goodies, treasure…no…that’s pirates and thieves? Anyway, I can’t wait until she gets married..I’ve told her to strut all the way down the isle…and when she gets to the top of the walkway, instead of looking at Guy, (her hubby to be,) she has to pull out her iphone and take a Selfie! HAHAHAHAHA. But on a serious note, she gives me hope! 🙂 🙂 They both do! Would i get married again…to the right guy…YES.

I know what i’m looking for in a man. I say it all the time and it’s funny how boys approach me. I don’t know if they read the blog, or just guess, then act upon what they think i’ll like, instead of just being themselves…but either way….I’ll feel it immediately. (The connection…not goolies.) But it’s about being mentally stimulated and physically attracted to them all at the same time for me. They need to know how to treat the girl that they desire… really well. They need to have loved, not be afraid to love and know what they’re doing! I want them to be sexy, i want them to be smart. I want them to be openly romantic. I want them to work hard. Be a decent human morally and be a great father. And that’s just to list a few bits and bobs…

Right now, i’m just enjoying the present and not fretting about the future. I’m planning for it…but not stressing about it. (I remember telling Lydia to do that…and she didn’t listen. LOL.)

Other than that, Ruby let a strange man ‘window cleaning’ man into the home whilst i was in the kitchen, and asked the Takeway guy to date me. Grannies are currently sat next to me, talking abut periods. Grannies don’t have periods do they??? I need to do foot rubs with Lisa…I love it whenever Lisa comes into my work with her hubby. She’s one of my favourites…and i need to do Prosecco with her. I’ve had a rude looking burger. Look!

And to help you believe in romance…here’s a throwback picture for you…It of the time when i was married to Keiran…and we were on our annual family holiday in the woods….he made an ‘I love you’ sign out of Giant Jenga in the woods, whilst i was 8 months pregnant, hormonal and moody. Then he climbed up an enormous tree to take a photograph of it, so that i could see it later. We’re separated now and we’re both happy…but it’s just a nice memory to have…and it’s the GOOD memories that you need to remember and that’s all you’ll have when you’re on your last few year, doing ya knitting on your rocking chair..

The Spanish Doc, Sex & Dating Sites


I’m on this crazy blog catch up and it’s killing me! Not having a cyber home to dilly dally my life out onto, means that I’ve bundled up all these juicy life events and emotions, that I know i’m going to have to report and well want to report, yet of course…i’ve not been able to. So bare with me. All i’ve done is keep note, write notes…which if you know how disorganized i am means that all i’ve done is jotted down ‘one words’ here and there, on random bits of anything…even the top wrists of strangers, that will remind me of the event and hopefully *trigger* me back to a moment…the moment. A great deal is actually happening or has happened to me…that now i have an overload of ‘notes’ that I NEED TO SHIMMIE OUT, like luscious greedy eyed…belly dancers…. immediately. *Smash plates here, just because you’re mad. Air kiss afterward.*

I rushed to a coffee shop, armed with a seed parfait, (and of course a couple of dresses that i picked up along the way from Topshop because they were divine and on sale…I even did a backwards run to buy them…a girls goddaa do, what a girls godda do *giggles,*) but yes…I was going mental, but honestly it’s fine. I’ve been writing out my thoughts ready… for the big old blog to get set back up.



(I’m actually knackered right now, because i spent the entire evening not sleeping and instead Googling Shakespeare quotes about flowers and love. Lol. Makes a change from Googling the words ‘leopard print’ or ‘Chrissie Wunna.’ But yes…Bloom and Wild my most favourite flower delivery service in the entire world, and simply because they’re modern yet romantic. You should all be doing it. I mean, what is better than fresh cut flowers that you can arrange yourself!!! It beats the normal, yet still thoughtful bouquet…but yes, they were looking for a quote for their new packaging, so i went online to try and find a delicious one…but i got distracted, randomly obsessed with who i used to call ‘Shake a speare, Sister’ I have no clue why? However, anyway, I then Googled star signs for about an hour. I’m into that, if you didn’t know. I shouldn’t be…but i am. ‘Simple Ben’ used to tell me that it was all a load of pants…Yet, I adore the art of believing that the stars you were born under, may somewhat signify a joyous bundle of personality traits that you, as a delightful sexy human…are made up of. I am like a Dec 19th, Sagittarian Female.)

Anyway, today in my world it’s Sunday April 24th. (That is when i wrote this.) By the time this goes out it probably won’t be at all April. So, ill try and catch you up…

I’ve been chatting to a boy…the ‘new addition’ that has pretty much has placed himself in my mind…constantly. Remember, I have a one track mind, so when i’m focused, I’m focused. I’m not a wishy washy kinda gal, even though i play ‘wishy washy, often. Anyway, I’m amazed by him and find myself messaging him literally every moment that I can, that i have spare that I can find! I even get excited when i see those three ‘message dots’ in a bubble wiggling, which tells me that he’s replying to me. *I KNOW, I KNOW, I’M TRAGIC.* He’s funny, he’s smart…he’s lots of things and has pulled me in. I even told I’m that I owe him a ‘gold star’ simply for being ‘sooooo clever.’ 😉 I’ve definitely romanticized/ glamourised it all in my head…i know this… and i have told him that…HAHA. Yet i can’t help it. I’m like that aren’t I! I’m feisty, i’m sassy, but a chick who wishes upon  stars and dreams of the fairytale. I don’t have it yet..but I WILL once day. To be honest, I think that i’ve managed to adapt myself appropriately to the life that i have lived, the experiences that I’ve had and the way that folk have treated me, the good with the bad. I do it well…and i’m happy, I’m fierce. I’m laughing at life! However, i’ve also noticed that i’m living in some crazy modern day age of dating, which is driving me NUTS. Jesus!

Obviously, It’s a Tinder, Plenty of Fish, world out there, be you 17 or 73 and it’s sooo frustrating.And yeah, i get it, people are busy or don’t get out much to meet others…I’m a busy girl, i work hard…but boys, men, all sorts DO still tinker my path, regardless. I hate online dating, and the stereotypical ‘i’m on a site’ chitter chatter. I’m not on any site but ‘Happn’ and i chose to be on that because I enjoyed the IDEA of the app alerting you when a guy you may like is LITERALLY  crossing life paths with you,…in that exact moment. Some weirdo sent me a charm and i didn’t reply. I sent a Doctor a charm..and he didn’t reply. Lol. (This was yonks ago…it’s not that Doctor.) And well i just don’t go online like that to date, like the rest of my chick friends. Plus, i’m in a different position to them. It all just ends in ‘i’ve blocked you’ or the handsome has ‘signed off,’ anyway. Well that’s what my chick friends tell me. 🙂 What’s sexy about that???  I’m literally stuck in a weird time of ‘dating.’ Nothing seems raw, or romantic or like the fairytale i hope it to be?? I’m panicking a bit. I want to be wooed, cherished, respected and loved. I don’t want someone to send me a cyber charm or score me out of 10, then show me a picture of their willy. *Weeps here.* I’m too old for this shit. HAHA. Just a normal, works hard, amazing, loyal guy, who adores me will do…no ‘charms’…no ‘likes’ no ‘bitch i’ve blocked you.’

As we’re on about dating…

I haven’t talked to the Spanish Doctor in what seems like ages…I came off my 10 days and he came off his busy work week, had family stress and all sorts. I was meant to schedule a date, well a second meet up for the four days that I was off…yet during those days…he had already scheduled himself away to go caving in Wales, with his brother. I got this message..(Wait, let me find it on Whatsapp…?)

Me: ‘So what was it you said you’re doing this weekend?’

Doc: ‘Extreme caving underground in old mines, zip lining and climbing, with falls and jumps, on ropes at 1800ft on Sunday. Then i’m downhill biking on Saturday in North Wales. Wish u were in my arms now. I want to undress you as I kiss ur lips.’

All i did was chill with my babies all weekend, and drink inferior cocktails from a can. (The Pimms one is shit.)  And even though, i internally decided that i’m going to see him again, the initial ‘flush’ of the connection seems to have dimmed a bit for me and i don’t know if it’s because of work and we both haven’t had time, or i’ve gone off him a little…as he seems more insecure about himself now. Lovely being,..but i like brave…or no that’s not what i mean, i enjoy truth…so if you’re not brave…you shouldn’t pretend to be and vice versa.  He’s definitely not as attentive and I’m shattered i wanted time with my children this weekend and go it, so i’m please. However, because i gave him my word.. i was still prepared to see him, regardless..He’s busy and during his free time he wants to feel free and at one with nature. I get that he needs escapism. Yet he’s closed about things now. I mean he still tells me how much he likes me, how beautiful I am and how much he had thought of me daily..without fail and has asked that i see him one evening next week if i’m free. So, i know that he likes me. And when we meet we get on swimmingly. Yet we hardly get to meet, meaning the connection dims and i’m not a little girl like that, they don’t need to be on my doorstep and with me 24/7 by any means. I believe people need freedom to be happy. Yet if you actually liked someone with every inch of your being…the excitement you have for them, doesn’t dim, right? …And i hate saying that, as i adore the *swirl.* And i’m sure that if i visited him again…and I will…i’ll feel the swirl once more. Yet. that ‘swirl’ should remain regardless.

PLUS now, i’m kinda concerned about the ‘sexy’ aspect of it all. Lol. He’s very forward in the sexual department, I don’t know if he pushes it to hide behind, or he’s just a hornball and is excited by me…I’m certainly no prude…we know that. I’m sensual by nature and very in tune with that side of womanhood.Yet,  i’ve got to ‘chemistry’ with someone more before i decide i want to (I was gonna say ‘bone them’ then, HAHA) well have sex with them. I mean God, if i had sex with every boy that told me they were captivated by me, i’d be………well just a dingle, dangle, dirty…. slag. HAHAH. (One boy messaged me yesterday rambling on about me being so fake, nasty and boring because i never replied to him. It started off by him asking me out…I said nothing, he had an entire conversation with himself… mad with himself and them BLOCKED ME. HAHAHAH. It was a charm to watch. I enjoy the madness of people, it’s literally so interesting to witness all sorts of reactions, when you do absolutely nothing at all. People are hard on themselves and without that guy actually knowing, he sort of accidentally  showed me all his insecurities in one fail swoop. Still didn’t fall for it though. Prick. 🙂 )

But yeah, I don’t know what to do about the Spanish Doctor now? I’ll see him again and i know it’ll be lovely. I’m just not ready to share sheets with him…and i get that he’s hot blooded, I get the Latin temperament. I was married to a Mexican. Lol. (Once.) And i get that he’s clever and knows how to try to seduce me…but so am I…and it doesn’t work. (I’m getting a flash back now of when he *rolled his eyes* because I wanted to talk and he just wanted to snog me, to try and get in my pants. Lol.) I’m much more on the ball than others believe… yet  i’m also schooled in the art of boys and dating. A department that he lacks experience in. So yes, i’ll see him and we’ll have amazing time…but i’m not putting out…and we’ll see how he reacts, as i think with busy’ness and everything else, like a mild distance…issues and all sorts…it’d end up being some kind of relationship where i’d meet him, he’d bone me and then i’d go home. And nothing is so snazzy about that. Wooing me is only good, if you potentially hope to love me…and never works if you’re ONLY trying to get into my frillies. I’m too clever for that. I’ll bite you. But remember he’s not a bad guy…he’s just been through a tough time with a alternate girl previously. I can smell it…





Keeping my options open…& Lee walks in…


Smashed Day 1 of what i’m labeling my ’10 day stretch’ with the greatest of ease, a smile, a greeting of a new face, and pretty much like a champion. To say I tottered into the ‘stretch’ dreading it, I sort of didn’t find it too difficult really. I charmed my way through it with…I guess I turned on my ‘steady away’ mode…as they call it.

Everything simple, everything calm…the rain poured down outside…my LA friends spent the entire day messaging me pictures of sunny Beverly Hills, to entice me back over there. (I AM VERY JEALOUS. Give me my Beverly Hills life back immediately.)

But on the whole, I was happy. I’m still waiting for news. I hate waiting for news. I hate waiting for anything. But i’m patient, as I know it’s the smart thing to do. So, if anything, i’ve summoned my inner Buddha…and found my total enlightenment…in the bottom of a wine glass. 🙂 (I hate waiting. I’m a go getter. I need answers immediately and constantly wish I could control them.)

All was well. All was lovely. I tottered into the back, whilst the new face left me for better pastures…as I wonder out..there he is…LEE, my favourite Policeman. I haven’t seen Lee in ages, well definitely haven’t seen him since after the Spanish Doctor date. He’s just returned to work, after his weekend long STAG do. (All i heard was KFC Krushem signs, that they didn’t steal, yet were given. Hmm? Hooters. Drinking games, with Hooter girls on his back and Press ups in front of trams. 🙂 ) What goes on during a Stag do, stays on a Stag Do. When I get married again…and I will. I’m having a Stag do.

But yes. It was REALLY good to see Lee, as it’s weird because I only met him towards the end of last year, so I didn’t know him at all until then…(as he helps secure my place of work…and saves the world or something? Lol. He got a BLACK EYE on his eye, from BANGING HIS OWN FACE, ON A TOILET SEAT! 🙂 He’ll save the world tomorrow.) However since then we’ve become really good friends…sort of like random best buds, but we have this brotherly, sister rapport, that not only comforts me, but cracks me up!

If I actually think about it, of recent, he’s actually the only person that I have told EVERYTHING to, Lol…over the last couple months…and I mean absolutely everything, no sensors or anything. . I’m open by nature anyway, so most people will get a lot out of me. I’m never really embarrassed. i just class the stuff that happens to me, as ‘life.’ Plus, I obviously write a very personal blog, about the ‘goings on’ in my life..Yet he gets the non edited version of it…as do most who know me. Yet Lee gets the full rendition, simply because he can see my face when I tell him the story…I see him almost every day…When I deliver a story, he in real life sees how I might actually feel, as opposed to how I tell you I may feel. I don’t refrain from delivering my true feelings to you, as by nature i’m blunt and truthful. I just skip things…because I can. And that’s only because every being needs to keep some things private.

So we’re like best buds, who have turned into Brother and sister. He’s like the over protective, yet cool big brother, who scowls when I date boys who are not right for me..and give me lectures like, ‘What happened to being celibate and not being bothered about dating?’

I mean, heaven forbid if he and his wife to be, have a little girl (i’ve sworn she’sll come back from their honey moon pregnant)…she’ll never date for him terrifying the boy, with his disapproving Fatherly eyes and head shakes.

Anyway, in walks Lee, and he’s asking me about life and my date. I’m asking him about his Stag. And I’m telling him everything about whats going on with boys, and how i’m feeling. He’s really good at looking out for me. Keeping me grounded…kinda like Jenna would. He genuinely cares. He does thoughtful things for people. I mean before i went into hospital, he was a star….and i adore good people. It makes me smile. But yeah, I’m rambling on about love…he’s thinks i should be single forever and that I currently don’t have any options. Let alone decent options. Lol. And he’s..well probably right. I’m don’t have the best track record. I just want to be cared for correctly and treated correctly, by a genuine soul, who is filled with love, kindness, confidence and decency. Someone exciting and brave when it comes to emotions and love. It’s really important to me when it comes to picking a gent.

I was telling him about the Spanish Doctor date and well I think after ‘chatter’ and tea, we sort of came to the conclusion that it was quite bizarre that after one date…the guy would adore me so much that he would want me forever. And that part is strange…as he’s also quite handsy, and passionate…which makes him pretty full on. Not too bad in my mind. Worth a second date…as the Doctor’s all spiritual and just knows, right? (Lee would do his disapproving *head shake* here.) The Doctor’s actually become a bit withdrawn as of today, and I have a little…as we haven’t sent each other a message all day. That’s normal. That’s fine. But my mind is in a different place, right now..and Lee could tell, as he says the way I tell the story to him, is very different, from what he’s read on this blog.  And it’s only because I felt different today. He’s very  busy. I’m busy. He’s not a bad guy at all. And i will go on a second I I want to get to know him more…as you don’t really know someone that well after one date, right.

However, let’s just say, for a girl that has a one track mind with boys…the Doctor is sort of now ‘an option.’ I’m being open minded about the whole dating thing now…and seeing what occurs naturally in life with the guys that decide or intend to pursue me. He’s still a good option.  I did say that to my favourite policeman…I mean , I just want to know him properly before i get I let a *swirl* carry me away (I hate it when Lee makes me sensible.)

The Spaniard thinks he’s intimidated me with his forwardness and feels all ‘oh nooo’ and more shy now…and he hasn’t. I like forward men. I love expressive men. (He is a bit too handsy. Lol. But it’s only because he’s genuinely so excited by me…so i’m flattered.) I mean, God, it’s better than a ‘dick pic’ from some 19 year old dude that saw me once in ‘Biggies.’

I mean, I also told Lee about something else…and well…he just told me not to be soft and to put things into actual perspective…as I am totally ‘soft’ when it comes to love, by nature. Unless, I think they’re taking the piss! I’m literally the most forgiving human…if i believe you’re genuine. Yet if i don’t and the person doesn’t attempt to prove it..(I’m a girly girl, I love it when men go out of their way to make an effort. I’ll remember it forever…Yet I’ll also remember the

So yeah, I’m keeping my options…

‘You just don’t know what’s gonna happen, or who’s going to just walk into your life… I mean, look at us, we didn’t even know each other last year!’ (A Lee quote.)

And that’s true…the boys that want you and really want you, will do everything they can to make sure you know how much they care for you, want you, or love you. They’ll show you, prove it to you and come get you….

The ones that don’t…just aren’t bothered…and that’s the reality of it all.

Other than that, i got yelled at and threatened by a group of gypsies today, to the point where I had to The Hierarchy to toss them away from my surrounding area…and I gave out ‘really bad,’ but i think it’s really good love life advice to teens. I love that teens come to me, with all their love life problems. They go to other people for important things like Uni choices…and work options..then come to me, for advice of lipstick and boys. 🙂 I love it because it makes me feel as though i’m inspiring…

FYI/ SOOooo disappointed that the Celeb Threesome Sex Scandal, that was banned from the UK tabloids, was only Elton John. Blah! I wanted it to be The Beckhams! Lol