Laughter, Love, Busy Times & Pie

I wrote this yesterday but didn’t bother to publish it…

One of those amazing days where you just SMASH IT. Filled with work. Filled with achievement. One of those glitzy ‘knuckle down’ and get kicking flourishes of absolute ‘in the end’ victory wiggles to wild air guitar vibes and that good old glorious positive energy …AND EVERYWHERE.

‘She never gets stressed. She literally THE MOST chilled person ever.’ said Vogue, Top Knot ‘Double B’ about the Ageing Burmese Glamour Puss to the masses.

Then we wee’d ourselves laughing over the ‘one liner’ of the night, as it seems that there is ALWAYS a moment, during each busy working evening, where in which an accidental inappropriate statement is made that makes us both *pause* and then PISS OURSELVES laughing. Something about the lack of legs and certain sexual preferences. 🙂

Everyone keeps asking me about any news on boys or dating? No news. No dates. I still haven’t even properly managed to effectively reply to ‘London Business Man’ and we’re just friends. I think because it’s kinda in the past for me now and because life and my priorities have altered, I’d just catch up and do drinks with him. Yet in the words of a close chick friend,

‘Didn’t he choose another girl over you at the beginning of last year and now that your doing SO well, he’s decided he made a mistake and now wants to date you?’

And yes…that is EXACTLY what has happened. So, technically, it’s not my fault that i’m unable to effectively reply or see him because surely my Mr.Right would know that I was fantastic right from the beginning? AND understand what I do, where I want to be and believe in it from the get go? Women are like business. You could lose a great deal, over a simple bad minute choice.

Yet, I’m not a ‘Bittery Mittery.’ I’m fun. I’d do cocktails with him in the name of friendship and good times. Like ‘Eton Mess’ and I….’London Business Man’ and I just have different life paths. Great guy. Just not my Mr.Right. And it’s mainly because I’ve noticed that even just as friends, he moans at me because I ‘don’t care about him’ or ‘i’ve forgotten him’ a lot and moans about the fact that I’m working all the time. I don’t like moaning. Yes, I like guys who go for it. If you like a girl…GO FOR IT. Send her that message. Tell her you’re keen. But being moaney at her, for her pursuing a dream and not putting you first is not going to score you points. BOYS do that. MEN weight everything up, pick up the pieces, jigsaw it together and build it into something even greater. As do women. (Yet we nurture and love.) So, I’ll know when I’ve met the right guy, because that’s what he’ll do and he’ll know that i’m the right chick, because that what I’ll do.

I’m open to lvoe and romance and I do hope to find it. YET, I won’t settle for something that isn’t right, because life is far too short for that. To me…..NOTHING is stronger than a TEAM, but the right team is what works. And I mean that  in work and romance. So if you bring the correct love into your life…you can only BLOOM to your highest potential. YET, the wrong dash of ‘ooh laa’ will STRESS YOU  THE FUCK OUT! Haha.  But only because they won’t understand the way your life works…so that part is vital.

I wrote this today after I got back from a rushy day of work work work…

Opposite day! So busy! So stressy! So hilarious, that ‘Firmonell’ and I just looked at each other and laughed with our fingers crossed and the intention to drink a river load of wine as soon as it was all over. Lol.Cupid hates me. But Bacchus and I… are DUDES!

But instead of rambling on, let me skim it for you…There were some great parts between the manic ‘busy.’

Mel baked me a cottage pie and even portioned out ready for me to eat at lunchtime. I love Mel. She is the most thoughtful human ever, who dashed off to get ‘Slimming world’ weighed, yet even managed to remember to bring me gravy. I love Mel. I thanked her with fresh cream Donuts. It was donut kinda day. Then we found ourselves doing these ‘old women’ love life rants at  23 year olds, who were exchanging ‘should get done anyway’ lifts for Chinese food.

Mel: ‘This is why we’re always single.’

Me: ‘You’re not even single anymore.’

I am sat on the shelf on my own. But i don’t care because i’m glitter shelf is FABULOUS. Don’t get it twisted. Lol. It has cottage pie and everything.

I ordered a waist trainer, because I feel all fat and wibbly. I know it’s not going to work. But it makes me feel better doesn’t it, so lets just pretend all’s well and let me get my ‘hour glass frame‘ on.

‘Ooh if it works on you than i’m getting one,‘ said Hot Sarah, who also recently shared the knowledge that cave women were sexier to cavemen, when they were on their period. SO (yes it didn’t end there…) THEY FOUGHT to come on their period FIRST simply to get laid? HAHAHA. Delcious bit of knowledge for you.

Mel: ‘We’ll watch Chrissie and see if she gets skinnier, we’ll all get one!’

Great! Lol. I’m gonna sit there like a hot oriental pig, in a fricking under garment corset, typing away, as they look upon me, feeding me up with pie and deciding if I look like the face of ‘Waist Trainer UK.’ 🙂 I’m sure my life is more glamorous than this? I’m not going to eat anything. Just wear the waist trainer and drink prosecco..whilst holding a kitten for the ‘aww’ factor and wearing ‘just frilles’ for the ‘ooh’ factor. It comes on Friday, so if I do anything this month…THE MONTH OF LURVE. It will BE with the BEST WAIST LINE EVER….:)

Firmonell: ‘I definitely heard Big D WAIT until I went to bed last night, before he opened a bottle of rum that I had banned him from drinking.’

Me: ‘I’d drink a rum on an evening?’

Firmonell: ‘Yes, but you’re an alcoholic…’

But not to ramble on about all that…

The blog, the brand, the ‘baddaboom’  IS really great right now! It’s buzzing in the palm of my little glittery hand. I’m feeling extra lucky and I shouldn’t say ‘lucky’ because GOD i’ve worked my sexy socks off for everything. But yeah, it’s all just slotting into place and GOD with a waist line AS WELL, you’ll all certainly collapse at knees and worship me at altars.

*I’ve just paused to do a set of sit ups. Hang on…*

Lots of stuff going on, I’m looking forward to The Cocktail experience in March. The best made cocktails, by all your favourite cocktail bars, under one glitzy roof. Ofcourse i’m there. OFCOURSE I’M THERE to cover it. I have Social Day. The British Style Collective. Miss Swimsuit Uk. The UK Blog Awards. Summit Live. The Brits. The British Lifestyle Awards. My personal Cocktail Tour and just everything everywhere, with everyone.

At the same time I have an inbox FILLED with exciting stuff. It’s sort of oozing away with proposals from brands that are, lets say… very ME. I’m excited.

I’ve come home today, thinking that I’d have time to decide who my first ‘Wunna Meet Me’ winner would be, but instead I got caught up with cooking tea for Ruby, blogging, and doing a bunch of interviews. I also have my House of Solo shoot coming out in the magazine shortly. I think ‘Abeiku A’ is at the Leeds fashion Event tonight? Lord knows when it’s due out? But I think we’re talking days now? I’l tell you when it’s out, don’t worry. 😉

I’m definitely in the mood for love. I want a calm, easy ‘love swirl’ of magic. Everyone deserves a bit of romance in February. I want flowers and kittens with bows on goddam it.

Maybe I should make my first ‘Wunna Meet’ winner be a date?

Maybe I should just chill a second and have a gin and tonic…

Love you. N’night! x

 

 

 

Busy Times, Cottages Pies & Chocolate Trains

Busy day! I’ll tell you that there was a moment where in which everything was a bustle, every phone was ringing, every email was swooshed into cyberland and the madness of ‘catch up’ was upon me and well everyone around me.

You see the thing about doing this bit of ‘glitz’ is that it’s worth nothing apart from a bit of ‘ooh look at me’ unless you are smashing that ‘bread and butter’ bell with giant mallets with a smile.

Today was about that…the bread and the butter…and even though the nitty gritty work is busy and quite difficult right now, it’s great because i’m thankful for it. It’s the ‘behind the scenes’ that makes the ‘show’ work. So yes, not everything is a *pout & a pose* in Wunna land there is hard work going down.

But I will firstly say and with mild laughter…THANK YOU EVER SO MUCH for the gzillion messages that I recieved from you all in regards to my weepy Mummy melt down. Lol. Honestly, it was just a moment and then it flew by. That’s why having ex husbands is great because you can always vent out at them. 🙂 It wasn’t so bad. I just needed a rant. I didn’t cry a stream of rivers, or as ‘Double B’ would say,

‘Cry into a cup and drink my own tears.’ Lol

Keiran came around yesterday and with a smile made sure I was fine and everything went back to normal with laughter. Well he kinda said,

‘I’ve made sacrifices too,’ 

..which i’m going to take as boy talk for ‘I’m sorry, you had a melt down.’ Lol.

Co parenting is never easy…but after a prosecco and good friends it really is wonderful. The Wunna land ‘pity party’ train has left the station.

If it makes you feel better, when I cried on my drive to the coffee shop, a chirpy in appropriate for my mood ‘Little Mix’ song was playing in the background, sort of demeaning my utter pain really. Lol. I didn’t tell you that bit because I wanted you to feel how I was feeling. But i’ll tell you now, as I’m weeing myself at the tantrum.

However, I will say, clever, clever to the boys who thought ‘ah she’s feeling weak’ and messaged straight in with a ‘I’ll be your shoulder to cry on’ approach.

Even though it didn’t work. I found it great, because at least you used your initiative and charm to attempt to get what you wanted. Lol. Yipppeee! I find that sexy.

All’s well because i’m been around my chick friends today. ‘Double B’ rocked a Vogue Top Knot at 9am and if anything made me smile it was that. 🙂 I relooked over the messages that ‘Fairytale Blond’ had sent me in regards to her visit to ‘Spooky Sue,’ (she’s our local physic Lol.) After hearing the results, I want to go see her. But only because she delivered ‘Fairytale Blond’ great news. My reading i’m sure will be filled with confusion. It will make me drink until she tells me what I want to hear. Hahaha.

Then I remembered (and this was all in the mist of the busiest day ever) that I had really wonderful chick friends that I spent 300 days with a year. I mean, you know you’re both Northern and have people who look out for you, when on their DAY OFF, they spend the morning HOME COOKING A COTTAGE PIE, portioning it into lunch boxes and THEN bring it into work for you to devour at your desk with a fork. NO ONE IS BETTER THAN THAT HUMAN. (I love you Mel.) I didn’t even bother waiting to be graceful, I snapped that shit open and stuffed it in my face faster than Speedy Gonzales on cheese wonder pills. That’s what good friends and good people do. They make you cottage pie.

Fuck the diet. I’ll start it in 2019. 🙂

Like I said, everything was so busy that I can’t even begin to tell you where the day went. Yes, it was stressful, but i got through it and when you smash things the best way you can, you don’t feel as bad when you get home, do you?

I had to dash away from work early to go grab my first born (Ruby) from school. I was kinda running late to say that I set off early and even though she’s a regular in her ‘after school’ click, she seemed as happy as can be.

SO HAPPY, that she decided to not rush off and instead show me everything that she and her classmates had made. (They get homework. Lots of it. I never have time to really sit down and do it all with her as much as I should do.)

Anyway, they have these weekly projects where you’re child can score points and you have to pick things to make and present once a week, like ‘Make a pair of binoculars/Kiddie Transport/An Adventure Land/ Write a diary for a week.’ Things like that. Its been running for a while and all Ruby and I have managed to come up with is ‘make a pair of binoculars’ which we did at the last minute on a Sunday night.

YOU SHOULD SEE WHAT SOME OF THE OTHER MUMS HAVE DONE.

Vicky (who is the Mama of one of Ruby’s favourite classmates) ended up dashing in late to the ‘after school’ club pick up, like moi and even HER face in passing was astonished at the work of ‘the others.’

Let’s put it this way, Ruby made TIN FOIL/TOILET ROLL binoculars. Her class mates had made giant half a wall rabbit burrow adventure lands that you could SELL in craft stores. Lol. ONE EVEN MADE AN ENTIRE REAL LIFE LOOKING TRAIN OUT OF FUCKING CHOCOLATE. And to round that chocolate train up (and it wasn’t a kiddie train, it was a full on detailed adult train) IT CAME WITH A POWER POINT PRESENTATION WITH PICTURES!! BY A FIVE YEAR OLD!

Ruby has NOT LUCKED OUT in the Mum department when it comes to homework. But hey, I was in the Daily Mail the other day for drinking? Does that score her points? Lol.

Ooh? I have another Whatsapp message…

London Business Man: ‘You really HAVE forgotten me..’