Naked Snacking, Castings & Hormones..

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This is how glamourous I am. I mean, everyone thinks that I wake up on a morning, throw on my diamante encrusted robe and get carried to breakfast, in nothing but heels, by half naked Greek male models in togas, with six packs.

I WISH!

Last night, I sat on my bed at around 1.30am, because I was too excited to sleep, with a ripped open packet of prawn cocktail crisps, a ripped open packet of salt and vinegar crisps..a raw green chilli as a side, as I swigged a mini red wine, out of the bottle, in front of my bedroom mirror.

Dirty Nicole: ‘You’ve kinda made that sound glammy?’

It was sort of like the Matrix, if you were snacky and it was a budget porn. Instead of the pills, I chose crisps. Instead of the creepy phone call…I swigged wine. Instead of black cape like coats…I wore nothing.

So basically…nothing like The Matrix, at all?

Hahaha! Hey! Ho!

Wednesday turned out to be a dream, in the end, after a dodgy start. I’ve been influencing…yes. But i’ve been going on a lot of Castings. There’s a lot of new shows coming out and I’ve basically, been on the audition rounds…with everything crossed.

But i’ve got really excited again. I love it so madly.  That’s why I couldn’t sleep. I was on the phone to America, about some show n the early hours of the morning.

I’m an entertainer at heart…nothing makes me happier.

However, I was kinda really stressed, for moments yesterday, but because i’m hormonal. I must be getting my period soon. I can tell because I’m enjoying eating everything I can and I would never EVER do that… in probably a zillion years.

Plus, I wanted one of those ‘Crying to Sam Smith’ baths, that ‘Passionate Jaz’ suggested. She apparently, gets into a RED HOT bath, and with the door closed, plays Sam Smith tracks, alone…and then CRIES. Lol I love it!!

Yippppppppppeee!

‘Yoooooooou SSSAAAaaaaaaY, you love meEEEEee…’

(..as you glug under..)

I decided against having one. I had an ace time with my babies instead. We had a great night. I’m loving being Mama. Ruby & Junior are literally the funnest people I know.

I’m not kidding, when I say that…

Some of my grown up friends aren’t even NEARLY as emotionally stable or confident as they are. Let alone as ACE! Probably because my mates didn’t have the delight of having ME raise them. 😉

Miserable swines.

Then I got called ‘Stuck up.’ (Dull.) At least i’m not ‘Vanilla.’ I’d rather be the absolute WONDER that I am, than a plain old Ryvita. It’s always the people with no excitement in their life, that hate on the ones, that have a GUST in their sails, a GIGGLE  in their wink.

I’m FAR FROM stuck up. You’d know that if you met me.

(Don’t get me wrong, I’m feisty…but what glamour puss isn’t. In fact i’m more polite, than I am feisty always!! Yet, I’m a lot of fun!)

I’m more big headed than I am stuck up. Maybe you got it mixed up? But that’s the truth. I’m humble and kind, yet I don’t think there is anyone, in any form of entertainment, that ISN’T a little big headed and ‘LOOK AT ME.’ 

IT’S OUR JOB.

There’s another Insta Question, that’s come in also, rambling on about my past and whether i’m ashamed of it!!!???!!!

‘Rolls Eyes.’

WHAT!! 

I’ve done really well for myself!!

Ashamed? Why would I EVER be ashamed of my past! I’ve had the most colourful, wonderful experiences so far…If anything I’m grateful, that i’ve been alive! It’s all part of my story and i’m proud of what I’ve achieved, how I’ve developed and glad that I’ve documented every single moment. I lived life with bells on and got up to all kinds of naughty. But I don’t care, because it has all contributed to who I am and what stand for today!!!

Rant Over.

(Techincally, I did say ‘Ask Me Anything.’)

 

Tony Boney: Y’know, there’s this new bracelet out that holds wine…’

Me: ‘It reminds me of a She Wee.’

Toney Boney: ‘Eh???’

Lucy: ‘You drink out of it, from your wrist…Not piss into it, from your vagina..’

Bottom line, it’s shocking and reminds me of She Wee, but for your mouth? I don’t know why? I’m just creative.  I mean,  I’d like booze on my wrist…if it was bouji. But really how much wine could you actually fit into, a WIDE wrist bangle.

Not enough for any normal human, Jesus or Ru Paul! 

Plus, it’s not very dainty is it? It’s just…alcoholism at it’s finest.

‘I’ve run out of wine…’

‘Here… there’s some on my fucking wrist.’

Gross!

But stop press!

Did you know that i have blogged for about FIFTEEN YEARS and that CHRISSIEWUNNA.COM has been going for TEN WHOLE YEARS,THIS YEAR! 

It’s my 10 year Anniversary and later on in the year, i’m going to be celebrating it…and THANKING all those who have helped my story come alive. (The first five years of my blog, I wrote in LA, on Myspace, on other people’s computers. Lol) 

Anyway, I’m going, I need to do my face, take a few Insta pics and then grab a quick drinks. I’m gonna make ‘Golfer Jonny’ (KatyP’s boyfriend,) feel my specs up and mould them to my face.

Kinky.

I’m in Leeds, tomorrow, meeting Blackhouse and then I’m headed to Tattu.

Have a great Wednesday.

If I leave you with anything…I’ll tell you that it only takes 21 DAYS to break ANY HABIT! 

All my love,

Chrissie x

Ps/ I’ve just got a DM from my friend Kyle…

‘How many thirsty guys popped up to that photo?’

(The one above. Lol)

Awww…and Firmonnell’s sent me a morning Video snap, saying she misses me. Why can’t guys be just like her!!!!

 

Empires, Kitty Leeds & Totally Rubbish Baskets

‘You always have the strangest basket…’

‘I know! I’m useless. I hate a big shop….How much?’

That’s what the lovely cashier said to me at The Co Op after I purchased a bottle of prosecco and a bag of kitty litter. (Not for myself, but for baby kitten Rocco. 😉 I could never poo in an actual tray, as obviously that would be somewhat unbecoming. J )

I used to really hate supermarket shopping. But now I quite like it. It’s growing on me. Yet, I can only saunter in and buy a couple of things at a time..OH and I don’t enjoy the cold isles. However, do know that these ‘couple of things’ are delivered to the cashier in the most uncanny combinations…to the point where she has noticed my randomness and needs to tell me to get help. 🙂

Here are some Wunna Land supermarket combinations….a bottle of Bailey’s and All Night Tampons..Goats Cheese and Bob The Builders Magazine....a BAG OF CELERY and Tweezers.

It works for me! I need to have the patience to commit to a ‘big shop.’

Anyway, how are you all! I’ve lunched today. I was meant to have a coffee meeting earlier this morning..I got up, ready, dressed and drove there and they didn’t show up and couldn’t even be arsed to tell me.

Yippeee!

I did actually see ‘Hustle Barbie’ en route…(Who keeps trying to steal my girl crush ‘Ellen Degeneres’ …because she’s a vegan. GET YOUR OWN VEGAN CRUSH…LIKE…. THAT CHICK I SAW ON YOUR FACEBOOK WALL CUDDLING A COW…OR WAS IT A DONKEY? 😉 )

Anyway…I didn’t have time to say ‘Hey’ simply because I had to show up for my meeting….that didn’t bother to show up.

How annoying!

Me: ‘Hi. I’ve just seen you…but walked right passed..’

Hustle: ‘Oh cheers! Thanks for popping in!’

But anyway, I shook it off and tinkered to Doncaster to do lunch with The Wunna’s. Plus, I needed a bit of a shop afterward. I ADORE A GOOD SHOP AROUND, when it comes to all girly necessities.

My Mum had a rough morning, so she needed some ‘first born’ love. When she told me the story, of what she went through today,  I was FUMING because even though I’m a fun loving ‘Sasserilla,’ I’m SO LOYAL to the people that I care about…

SO LOYAL, that I’ll not have ANYONE firstly try to cause ‘drama’ where drama isn’t due and secondly….’have a go‘ at someone that I care about.

‘Get your finger out of her face…’

We ate and drank loads. Like ya do. Totally made us feel better. I love my mum. Don’t mess with Wunna Land.

*Wink*

BUT OH MY GOSH! We need to stop everything because I need to find me some kinda crazy ass diet plan immediately, for 2018.

I was doing so well and being all veggie and losing weight left right and centre. I kinda felt ‘banging.’ I felt great. I had a glamour pussy, MILF strut.

Over the last week..I’ve eaten everything…probably even YOU. I’ve drank EVERYTHING…You’re share. I’ve indulged in foods that my body would never ever ALLOW…passed my ever so LYPSAL lips.

So yes…I now feel chubby…which is quite inappropriate to say that I have a  MILLION flipping PHOTOSHOOTS, where in which I AM TO POSE….with either NOTHING or hardly anything on!

Yipppeeee!

FYI/ Thank you to all of you, who are engaging with my ‘socials.’ I love you for it. I appreciate it, deeply.

Lord knows what i’m gonna do, other than ‘wing it?’ But I quite fancy getting into shape right now. I love a diet. I love a bit of action. I hate it when everyone goes on about it because it’s the NEW YEAR. (Even though I’m rambling on about it now. 😉 Why does the New Year make us want to ‘all of sudden’ be skinny? )

I have no clue which diet, or who’s diet to follow??? But i’m sure after posting this…..some Diet Guru…will come a knocking on my glittery door, with a plan, an idea and a collaboration. (It’s how it all works now.)

BOUJI

Everything’s great. I’m actually feeling wonderful. Life is just brill right now. It’s delicious.

I’ve noticed that everyone’s getting geared up for 2018….You’re all posting ‘i’ve had a good year’ quotes and ‘i’ve learnt all these lessons’ quotes, on your feeds. 🙂

I’ll tell you, that I’m excited for times ahead, yet like I said, i’m staying in the present. What’s meant to be is meant to be. What’s yours… is yours. What’s not…is not.

All you have to do is *roll* the ball, down that grassy hill and with that little push, see what magic happens.

Do also know that you still have a whole entire DAY LEFT OF 2017. It’s not over yet. Anything can happen in an hour, let alone an entire day. So, don’t be washing away your sins until it’s time. 🙂

I’m a really lucky girl and i’m going through a really lucky time. I thank YOU for that.

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I thank anyone who’s given me a reason to write this year. You’ve made excellent content and been a great cast (as I like to say) throughout 2017. As people have read my life and if you have been included in this blog this year, they have also read about YOU AND YOURS….GLOBALLY.

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I’ve had the biggest hits of all time this year ( a quarter of a million monthly unique visits) and it’s all stemmed from the fine art of ‘diary writing.’ Something so simple that means so much to me. We’re still smashing every single continent of the world….it’s still being translated into 47 different languages daily and…the blogs age range has been SO wide this year, that it’s danced from SIXTEEN year olds… to those who are SIXTY FIVE years of age. Men AND Women.  Can you even believe it!??!!!

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I’ve kinda taken huge ‘baby steps’ this year, y’know stomped my stiletto firmly, into my patch of ‘cyber’ and you’ve listened. I haven’t been scared this year. I’ve gone for it. I’ve done everything I needed to do, to make changes, to just be happy. Both in love and work.

This year I worked hard…and the blogs beginning to make it’s mark…

THANK YOU SO MUCH!!

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(Honestly, you don’t even know, how much I appreciate you reading this! I’m finally building an empire…)

GOSH!!

I have everything crossed for 2018…You never know what’s going to happen…

But before that…like I said, WE HAVE A WHOLE ENTIRE DAY LEFT of 2017!!

Let’s make it a good one, eh!

Tomorrow morning at 10am…I will be visiting the MUCH TALKED ABOUT  …

KITTY CAFE

IN LEEDS….

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I’ll be there from 10am. (It’s now fully booked out!!)

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I’m taking Ruby and Junior..and we couldn’t be MORE EXCITED to drink exotic teas, sip a couple mocktails and enjoy lunch, as we stroke the resident kittens!!

Follow my Insta stories, Snapchat and Facebook tales….and you’ll get to see what we get up to, when we take on the Kitty Cafe!

All my love,

Chrissie x