I can’t park for toffee! Honestly. I drive around glamourously…
Jiggly Jill: ‘No, you don’t. You sing along to Little Mix and drive DIAGONALLY ACROSS car parks, to get to a spot, where there are lanes and arrows and all kinds of roady shit.’
Anyway…then when it comes to actually having to pull up and park, I just can’t get my head around ‘da moves’ and it all just goes wrong. I tried to do the school run this morning. The car park was so busy, filled with Mums, Dads, Nannies & navy blazers…But could I get in a spot and park up.
COULD I **** (I’ll let you put in a word of your choice there.)
I did some 40 point car shuffle, still didn’t squeeze into the spot, got flustered at myself, Ruby & Junior are laughing in the backseat because I’m getting angry at myself…so I had to reverse, drive off and find a side road…just to get the children into school on time. 🙂 It wasn’t even a tight spot. It was just a normal parking spot.
Me: ‘This is why I hate coming late! I need an empty car park in order for me to be able to PARK.’
Ruby: ‘You’re an idiot.’
(And that’s coming from the Heir to the Wunna Land throne. I mean, who creates a human, squeezes them out of their privates, loves them, nurtures them, feeds them, guides them…and then has to look at the back seat and hear them calling you a fool. LOL)
One day i’ll just get driven, so I don’t have to park anywhere that has more than NO CARS around me. 🙂
Love is in the air right? I feel it. I feel it swirling through each one of us, as we ‘almost’ tinker on into February. Everyone’s getting engaged. Everyone’s falling for heros. Everyone’s girly giggling over crushes and it’s making my newsfeed feel delicious.
I Like it.
(Even though I don’t have a Valentine Date and will therefore have to order myself roses…which is code for ‘rum’ to make me feel better, OR just pretend it’s not happening…so I don’t feel as bad. Lol If in doubt. BLOCK IT OUT.)
No, but honestly, it’s just lovely seeing you all so happy and being so open about being happy and in love! It’s a wonderful thing expression and it’s just great to finally have a newsfeed filled with people saying,
‘This girl though…’
‘Honestly, have the most beautiful wife…’
‘Soooo in love…’
‘Couldn’t be without her…’
‘I’m the luckiest girl in the world…’
‘She said *YES*’
It’s like i’m peeking through a giant glass window, looking on in at you all, from my sassy Wunna Land throne…as the Butler, who is obviously, half naked and in a Greek Toga pours me another Prosecco into my frosted iced chalice. I imagine him being from an exotic land and has been taught to only respond to Wunna Land commands…
‘I said BOUJI!!’
I’m never worried about my love life….The right guy will always find you and make you his, if he wants you that badly enough. You meet when you’re meant to. It’s timing. Life timing. Plus, it’s a guys natural instinct. All boys are Heros really. We girls are just able to tend to being heroic, without the use of a prompt. 🙂
So, if you’re single and can’t seem to mingle…Don’t worry. He’ll find you. He’s coming for you. (Hopefully, he’s not creepy. I totally made that sound creepy, instead of lovely. 🙂 Firmonnell sent me a creepy cartoon picture of herself yesterday, in a hole….like a mole….It was our ‘Miss You Monday,‘ day. We have a chick cyber banter every Monday afternoon.)
Firmonnell: ‘Maybe we can have real life Monday Meet Up’s Wunna! Lol’
Me: ‘We’ll do next Monday!’
(Do know, that she’s just being needy, as I did see her almost every single DAY of 2017. Lol When she’s not needy, i’m like ‘HELLLLOOOO, WHY ARE YOU NOT NEEDING ME!’ When she IS needy…I have to point it out, but secretly love it! 🙂 )
I had a quick meet up with *Big A* from ‘House of Solo’ magazine yesterday afternoon. He was running late, so I ended up having drinks with my old school friend Kate, Jodie and a dog, by a fire place. Apparently one got ‘lost down a puddle‘ and the other had ‘no face on.’
When *Big A* got arrived, he was all stressed out. Obviously he runs a Fashion Magazine. He owns it. With owning things…comes STRESS. I mean, he’s working with some of the biggest artists an models globally right now, so it’s mayhem.
He’s a creative, so he’s good at all the ‘creative shit.’ But when it comes down to the ‘nitty gritty,’ the business, the being organized …He lets it overwhelm him, buries his head in the sand and maybe hides a bit. Lol. Which we all know is fun!
(I literally had a day in LA, it was a Wednesday, where I woke up, read something shitty, had hundreds of emails bombard me at once, thought my life was going to be horrific and still naked, just laid back down in bed, pulled the duvet over my head, and hid… from Wednesday, until around 3pm. And I only got up then because I had an audition at 4.30pm in Burbank.)
So, I emotionally organised *BIG A* and forced ‘do work’ upon him, mid chatter. He’s a sensitive soul, so if you send him a grumpy email, he gets grumpy. I’m insensitive when it comes to things like that. I don’t absorb it. I read a grumpy email…and reply with charm and kindness. I do it all the time.
Like, ‘Big A’ I’m a creative, but when it comes to Wunna Land, I’m good at all the ‘little bits’ as i’m quite organised and i’m used to hearing people moan at me, i’m used to feeling under pressure and well the art of business, PR or attention.
Luckily for me, I don’t OWN a Fashion Magazine (Yipeeee.) I just run my own land…
I turned ‘living my normal every day life’ into my job, because it was the only thing I loved, the only thing I knew how to do and did well. Plus, it’s easy…and I like things that are easy. 🙂 Slogging away at things that don’t wanna ‘give,’ causes wrinkles…causes stress.
I’m ZEN. I’m like a stress free zone…Apart from when i’m parking.
Big A: ‘I have five shoots this week in London and one in New York. I have to organise them all and I have. But Sony have changed the shoot from New York, to LA…and now back to New York at the last minute. It’s stressful!’
Me: ‘Lol. You just need to get on top of it all. Do you want a drink?’
Big A: ‘No. I’m dieting. How’s all your stuff going…’
Me: ‘Yeah…You’re gonna hate to hear it…But really well. It’s really easy, right now. Lol’
Anyway, I’ve godda fly. I’ve got a ‘doer upper’ that i’m doing doing up. It’s a massive job and a ball ache. I kinda just want to *blink* and it look like a magical fairyland filled with style and class. The result is glamourous, but the ‘grind behind the glamour’ is hard as **** (Use your own word.)
I messaged ‘Happy Birthday’ to someone who I’ve got to know more closely over the last year. I like him. He’s ‘Good People.’ Good soul. Funny guy. Works hard. Interesting. Attractive. But funny. I like funny.
He’s another year older, but ‘still feels young.’ He seems pretty happy, so that’s all that matters. If I flashback through snippets of time and messages….It’s actually been a blast!
Like I remember being sat at a bar, as we were messaging back and forth and then receiving this Snapchat filter from him, of him singing along to The Voice, with the ‘bunny ears’ filter on. Lol.
I opened it, watched it and then my phone flipping DIED on me…so he didn’t get a response until 20 minutes later when I had got the bartender to charge my phone for me, behind the bar. Lol. So, he would’ve totally thought I shunned his comedic popstar operatics. When really I was pissing myself out loud. Even at the moment and that was ages ago…I adored him.
An example of being young at heart…
I guess we all still feel young underneath it all, don’t we? We’re all just these kids that had to grow up. Haha.
I think those with young spirits always feel fresh. He’ll be 80 and still feel 20. I’ll be 80, dressed like a slapper at the bar, still thinking i’m hot, flirting with 19 year olds, who obviously think i’m hideous…Yet, I’ll be loving it anyway!
Have the most WONDERFUL Tuesday Everyone!
ps/ Happy Birthday Dude. 😉