Influencing Lip Balms, Nudey Balloons & I Fainted

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Mornings make me happy and they’re such an important part of the day because each time you wake up, (whether you’re fresh as a daisy, off to work, rolling some eye candy out of our bed, hungover, happy, worried, or dashing off with the kids,) you get another shot at doing life! It’s a whole new start! It feels good! We kinda take it for granted.

Just like that… everything could stop…So it’s important to remember to treasure and enjoy the things that you have… while you still have them.

Only do the things that make you happy, fall in love, take your chances, look good whilst your doing it and make your wishes and dreams come true. Build your career, build your family, never feel judged by what people think or say and live it with every inch of your soul.

(Why am I trying to sound like some life guru right now? ๐Ÿ™‚ Let’s be real, I fainted last last whilst on the actual toilet at around 1am in the morning. Lol. Am I the only ‘glamour puss’ to ever do that?)

Now, before we all start getting in a tizzy and ringing all these panic bells. It was a comedic faint, not a ‘Call the Doctor’ faint.

My drunk chick friend had been snap chatting last night, before ‘shut eye’ and charger ‘plugins.’ย 

Chick friend: ‘I’m only on 11 percent battery life now. I’m pissed. Mof sleep.’

Me: Don’t you dare wake me up, start all this *look at me, look at me, pay attention to me* thing and then just be like, fuck it i’m off to sleep, once i’m here! Lol’

I was laid in bed, fast asleep…happy as can be….and then my stomach started to kill….It hurt SO much, that I was trying to ignore it. I tried to pretend that it wasn’t actually happening, because ofcourse, when you do, and you close your eyes, whilst hiding under the duvet…it’s not! ๐Ÿ™‚


When I was 19, the guy that I was dating cheated on me and I’d walked into his home and seen him in bed with a girl…that he had ‘boned’ all night.


At the time I was devastated…OFCOURSE! But now, at 37 and after doing moderately well in life, ๐Ÿ˜‰ย  I look back on that memory fondly, like it’s a juicy, yet comedic little burst of Wunna life memory because HE DID the ‘close your eyes, hide under the duvet and pretend it’s not happening’ thing…and in that moment, he must have REALLY shat himself. Poor sod.

He went on to try and win me back. I moved to Hollywood and married a ‘movie star.‘ ๐Ÿ™‚


How have I got this distracted!?! I’m meant to be telling you about my flipping tummy ache.

Hurt so bad (like that cramp you get in your leg that is uncontrollably painful, but just like ouchy bits of life, you have to go through it anyway…Lol.)ย I was trying to *swag* it out. When you *swag* something out, when no ones watching you, it’s really awkward and uncomfortable. ๐Ÿ™‚

Got up, did a giant naked SPRINT to the loo, sat on the toilet and I don’t know what happened, but my whole body did this hot, cold, flush thing, all these yellow blurry dots, *fuzzed* over me, and I kinda just remember keeling over for a moment, losing m mind and feeling all hot and sweaty…

I woke up on the floor, after about a minute or so, right as rain, like i’d just watched a bit of telly, or had a ham sandwich…

Then I ‘naked’ walked back to bed and immediately fell asleep.

Why am I so WEIRD! THAT IS NOT NORMAL. No wonder I’ve been married so many times!!!

Dear Future Husband,

Please just love me anyway…

Look!! I look really good half naked with balloons….

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OOoooh Balloons…

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Sold? Good! Thought so! *Wiggle Wink*

But away from all that….Yesterday was a great day!

I was at a catch up meeting with ‘Big A’ from ‘House of Solo’ Magazine, minding my own business, rambling on about my life, going on about how i’m going to be getting this new amazing body….

…and as I scrolled through my email, I received a message from ‘Amy’ in regards to the Lypsyl Mirror Compact Lip Balm, that I had loved and therefore ‘influenced,’ on my socials.

I loved it so much and like I always say, when you’re an influencer you receive and try out a lot of things, be they products, places, or people….and it’s hard to fit everything into your socials….

However, I genuinely loved my mirror compact madly and was so grateful to Lypsyl, that I basically featured it on my Instagram, Twitter, Snapchat and Facebook immediately…

ALL MY SOCIALS (which you should all be following)

Yesterday….My Lypsyl Mirror Compact and I were featured in The Sun…and Fabulous Magazine…

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How good is that! I literally *SCREECHED* in the middle of Ego, at my meeting….

House of Solo, ‘Big A’ kept doing these ‘being jealous’ faces at me. Lol.

But it felt really GOOD, to have teamed up with Lypsyl (which is a huge glorious brand,) influence something and then to see it in the national press…

It felt really good!

(They’re such a wonderful team…)

I was jumping around a cocktail bar, they were jumping around their office.

Everyone was filled with excitement…

I felt like theย luckiest girl in the world….and when I’m excited, i’m like a little girl. I beam!

I WILL tell you, that things in my life right now, are kinda wonderful, in ALL areas…..I know! Can you even believe it?ย  And whether I am or not, right now, I feel like the luckiest girl in the world…

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New Vlog, Blogging, Love or Money


So, I heard on the radio today that around 82 percent of people in Yorkshire, would rather have a lottery win, than find their true love. Can you believe it? I mean, I’m in a solid relationship, so i’d never place a donkey of dosh in front of it. (I don’t think? ๐Ÿ˜‰ Lol. ) But there are times, probably in every single moment of every day, ….where in which i say ‘I wish I won the lottery.’ So I completely and utterly get it. Yet, how messed up have we become? It’s surely meant to be love that makes the world go around…and not little bits of printed paper that can buy us things like freedom, a fast car, a girl, or our dream house? Money definitely makes the the journey much easier, as it reduces the normal stress of life, it oils the cogs and relieves us of panic.Yet when that becomes the focus…and we’re wishing it grew on trees because of fear…then we’re fucked. So, if you do anything today, don’t worry about any financial stress you may have and just enjoy love. Tell the people you’re meant to care for, that you do. We forget to do that always. I mean, I posted the Lady Gaga ‘i’m quitting music’ speech to my Facebook wall today…and everything she said was right and mattered. She’s living proof that you can have EVERYTHING financially and not be happy, until you see life for what it’s for and the things that truly matter.

Okay, away from that. I’ve filmed my Vlog and it terrified me. This time around, it’s a little long, and i shook like a leaf all the way through it. It’s just so weird, because i’m really good when i have a camera in my face, yet when it’s Vlog time, I panic and get all nervous. Blogging is far less terrifying. (Ben is currently annoying me by AGAIN, trying to talk to me ALL THE WAY THROUGH my fricking blog. He pines for attention when he doesn’t think he has it. Lol. It’s like having a puppy, an annoying one, that’s just had a ‘Harvey Wallbanger’ in a can and wants you yo play with it. ๐Ÿ™‚ )

Hope you enjoy it though and hope you all start showing ‘cocktails in a can’ some love.

Here you go…Take a peeky..

Tonight, we’ve had a fresh coconut juice night! Remember that I blogged about how shite trying to crack open a coconut was…well Marks and Spencer have come up with a plan…and it’s a real life coconut, that you can ‘ring pull’ open like it’s a can of pop! I know! You then just jab the ‘given to you with the coconut’ straw in the top and Bob’s your Uncle, Mary’s you’re Aunt. You have fresh coconut juice on tap. (Ruby loves it. Junior hates it.)

The babies have actually been amazing tonight. Junior came back from nursery a bit feisty. Yet he always comes back from his Dad’s a bit more feisty, i never know why, yet i’m sure he’s fine? His speech has come on threefold though. He’s so chatty now, that i can’t believe that i’m actually watching him grow right before my own little Asian eyes. Amazing! I love it. It makes Mama happy. Ruby’s just a Mini Me, so in my eyes, a doll. Lol. To be honest, I couldn’t be more proud of her, as she is soooooooooooo keen on school and learning, that it sort of makes me feel like i’ve done an alright job and being Mum.

I’m currently having a Pina Colada and Ben’s listening to ‘Top Five Worst Singers’ on Youtube and every single one of them are my favourite artists and songs! HAHAHA. We’re giggling and right now life just seems soooooooooo lovely. (I want to win the lottery. Lol.) ‘Your cock or mine’ was again my top search today for this blog. Ugh! I’m really not a tranny. I’m a real life girl. (Honest!)