Getting A Preachy & Naked, Showering Grandads

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Happy Tuesday! It’s just a beautiful day and we’re having a beautiful start to Summer. I’m dipped in happiness and i’m trickled in the ‘good life.’ I’m feeling positive and optimistic and the reason why that’s so important to me, is because over the last few days, there’s been some really GREAT BITSFUN BITS and HILARIOUS MOMENTS of just pure life, that you could only wish to Polaroid…I mean in the space of 20 minutes an elderly gentleman offered to ‘soapy sud’ his entire body, in a shower…for my Insta story. He even did the ‘actions’ …which was also a delight. (Not.)

Me: ‘You do know that I WILL make you do it, for insta likes. I AM that shallow.’

KatyP: ‘Haha. Leave her alone now. It’s not wash ya Grandad Day, Mate.’

He was the most hilarious, golf playing soul. Filled with banter and all the wit in the world. I think he was called ‘Trevor’ or something?’ Anyway, he was in a red tshirt….and directly in my eyeline, because to my right hand side, flirting had occurred, that I was trying not to watch. Lol. He definitely indirectly called me ugly..

Me: ‘Aw. Don’t Start. I’m not in the mood for this. I’ve just been grilled about my life for the last 2 hours.’

Then pretended his wine was 4 shots of sambuca (i hate sambuca)  and all the rest of the ‘hard stuff.’ I love a bantery Grandad. They’re just my cuppa tea. And I don’t mean ‘FANCY,’ before you all start sliding into my DM’s. Lol. I do like ‘silver foxes’ though. Or when a guy gets, what I call his ‘salt and pepper‘ in. Y’know what I mean. When they’re going a bit greym on the sides.

IT’S SO SO SEXY! I COULDN’T LOVE IT ANY MORE ON A GUY. IT MAKES MY HEART GO *RAPIDO.*

HOWEVER….

…as the story always goes, over the last few days, there have also had moments where people have BORED me. I’ve been yelled at, ‘earfulled,‘ drained, immersed in the lives of others, who may not be as secure as I. Caught in the tales of those feeling utterly ‘lost‘ and listening to ‘he said/she said‘ drama… of that ever so important… ‘this and that.’

DULL

I’ve watched people cry. I’ve made them feel better. But ultimately it kinda made me realize that i’m nothing like that. I’m really together. I’m really secure. I’m emotionally strong. I’m warm hearted, yet not someone to be messed with. I have my pride, but i’m kind. I’m so direct that there’s not even ONE SEXY BIT of me that is lost. I did ‘being lost’ ages ago, it was ugly…so I got myself a one way ticket, back to ‘FOUND.’

you’re currently lost in the wilderness, sort yourself out, because honestly, you’re not going anywhere in life, emotionally, physically, mentally or financially, until you do.

You can throw yourself 100 ‘pity parties,’ THROW A THOUSAND and it’s not going to make ANY bit of difference. You’re not only going to make people tired of hearing it. You will 100 percent, not have the opportunity to ‘get sexy’ with ANYONE. NO ONE WILL SHAG YOU….ever. Lol.

And yeah, times can be hard, and life can be a bugger….BUT GOD, nothing is more unattractive than staying on ‘Team Lost.’ I cannot say it enough. By all means, feel it, have a blow out, express it…but get over it. Everyone has stuff ‘going on.’ Some handle it better than others. Bad times are temporary. The ones who hold onto bad times, instead of knowing that better times are approaching…to me….are the weakest souls. I actually can’t stand it. I don’t have any time for it.

That was just a very long way of saying…

MAN UP.

But, yes. I’m off to enjoy the sunshine today and grab a drinky. Last Friday..well I think it was Friday? Anyway, I had a good news phone call. ..and it made me feel all excited because, I filmed something a while ago…and it’s almost time for you to see it on your telly box.) I just had to go through everything with the producers and it felt really exciting because it made the moment feel ‘alive’ again.

I love those moments.

But yes, sorry for not blogging over the last in a couple of days. I accidentally decided to prioritize other things over it. Turns out…that wasn’t the best idea. Lesson learnt. I’m at my strongest when I focus on the things that I love…and this blog is certainly ONE of those things…

But i’m back. And I’m loving it….

Let’s just enjoy the sunshine, while we still have it.

ps/ Thank you those who went wild over my half nudey pics. Lol There’s always the ‘naked’ phase in every showman’s career.

What I Need In A Guy….

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Life is flying at a million ‘WTF’s’ per hour. It’s crazy. There’s been kitten strokes, smoke alarms and utter madness, that has been *paused* by bits of calm. So much keeps happening to me and it’s a mixer of ‘all things dandy,‘ drizzled with trips ups. I ‘trip up’ well, so that doesn’t bother me. I can always brush myself off and wink my way forward with a *shrug.* When good things happen, I sort of fill myself with a kitten like’ excitement. Yet, I do get terrified.

But on the whole, I’m glad the clouds have hovered over Yorkshire this afternoon, (today is the Tour De Yorkshire,) as it pretty much keeps me out of trouble. I just can’t keep myself in when the sun comes out to play. Yet that’s what life is about. I’m all ‘Suns out, Wuns’ out. I’m enjoying good times, refraining from over thinking anything and trying to just have fun with everything. You’re a long time dead and well, usually, as the fairytale goes…it kinda all works itself out in the end, doesn’t it?

EVERYTHING HAPPENS FOR A REASON…

Over the last couple of days, i’ve spent quality time with my friends ‘Katy P’ and ‘JD’ and we’ve all just decided that our love lives (over wine) are shocking. They’re shit. Does it ever get better? Where’s my Prince, who comes trotting along on some stallion, with his one arm *scoop,* ready to sweep me away? Where is he? (Can you tell i’m Needy AF’ today. :))

Katy P: ‘I think it’s hard for you date. I mean, men get the wrong impression of you, because they don’t know you well enough. You’re sexy and they love sexy…yet they don’t see the softer side to you… I don’t know whether they don’t want to, or if they aren’t smart enough to?’

In love, I’m sassy and i’m quite the seductress…and I love that about me. I’m forward. More forward than the guys I’ve met. I wish guys WERE more forward with me. YET, at the same time i’m a hopeless romantic…and I can’t help that. After years of failed ‘love’ ..all the way around the world an back, (lol) i’ve learnt to appreciate the small things and treasure the simple things in life.

I do like to feel ‘impressed’ by a guy. I enjoy being chased. I love being ‘wooed.’ I’m not gonna say that I don’t adore the finer things in life, also. However, a guy could buy me a room filled with diamonds, upon diamonds, to show me how much he cares…and I’d appreciate the effort, whole heartedly. But i’d never appreciate that over a simple ‘love letter,’ as that’s something i’d hold close to my heart forever. I’m creative and I adore a creative gift. If i’m being honest, I’d adore a creative partner.

Anything ‘complicated’ or too difficult…is not something that I’m going to enjoy. If you have to try so hard to make someone want you, then it’s a ‘no go’ really, for me. They’re not that interested. They’re not that into you. I’m both unconventional and traditional all in one. Boys should chase girls. Always. If they don’t, then i honestly just think they don’t care. (And sometimes that isn’t the case, I know. But i need a brave man.)

Plus ‘Josh The Bartender’ once told me that when a guy loves a girl he’ll place her on a pedestal and that pedestal will be so high that no other girl will ever even come close to her. I’ve remember that and every time my paths crosses with another…I flashback to it.

I miss Josh. Where the fuck are you??

So, after a conversation with ‘Katy P’ about cougar loving, sexting and life… in a Justin Bieber top…

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Katy P: ‘Boys just seem to *go at* sex. Real men, can READ ya body better during sex and grown up women give better blow jobs. We must, because you’ll know, don’t they always looked astonished afterward, with a *where did that come from* face. Lol. But no, I never sext. I’m not good at it. I never know what to say?’

Me: ‘I love sexting. I can talk some filth via message. Lol. But i’m a writer..it’s a strength. Hahaha. But yeah, I know what you mean about the blow job thing. You do know that Toyboys are so in right now. Everyone’s doing it. Shall we get more wine?’

Katy P: ‘Younger men are attracted to the confidence that a WOMAN has… over a young girl. We just say it how it is and get on with it. We’re not naggy. We’re better in bed. We know what we want and if we don’t get it…We sack it off.’

Me: ‘They’re not forward though. They’re more terrified than anything, I think? I can feel them being terrified. I like forward. Not creepy forward. Just emotionally brave men. I don’t like them playing the *game* of love. It’s long. I don’t have time for that shit.’

Katy P: ‘You love eye candy though!!!’

Me: ‘Well yeah. I want them to be hot. Who doesn’t!! But i’m a personality girl. I mean, look at that Creepy Deadpoll guy, that follows you about. I only don’t like him because his personality is off. He’s strange. His social skills are wank.’

Then I found myself stood by hot dogs with one of my besties Jenna, as the Tour De Yorkshire *whizzed* by to cheers. I watched it for a bit and then sacked it off for a drink and a blog at ‘Ego.’ It was there and I supported the women’s race…but let’s face it...ROLL ON THE MEN IN SHORTS!!

Jenna: ‘We might as well become lesbians.’

Me: ‘Bagsy the *lipstick,* one, cos i’ll need you to put the bins out.’

Jenna: ‘You just need someone who’s cares so much, but is like FIRE. Someone who knows what they want…They want YOU and they’re not gonna let ANYONE ELSE FUCKING HAVE YOU. YOUR THEIRS.’

Me: ‘God, you’ve made that sound so hot. Haha. I love that. I’m looking for actions not words. What they DO. Not what they SAY their gonna.. and they need to be self less…I hate selfish people.’

But is that too much to ask for? No. So nowadays, I just do the ‘happy being single’ thing…until a Knight comes a striding in with his ‘one armed scoop.’ I’m someone that will feel it straight away…and i’ll finally be putting the ‘square peg, through the square hole,’ without complications…

Bethy G: ‘Do you want a biscuit. Men are shit, they’re all the same…’

🙂

Chrissie x

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Va Voom, Life & Lucky Little Me..

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Happy MONDAY! The snow has finally disappeared and today in good old Yorkshire…the sun is OUT! I might even have a BBQ and wear a polka dot bikini.

Chick friend Mazzy: ‘How about you do the opposite and just actually put ya clothes on.’

YIPPPPPPPPPPPPEEEEE!

(Why are all my friends dicks.)

I’ve made the official decision to hate snow. It’s not by ANY MEANS, cute, white and fluffy. It’s shit. And if I could influence anything…It would be for you to realize how snow, is ONLY great at Christmas…when we need it.

What have you been up too? I’ve have so much going on right now and i’ve headed myself into a really really busy month. Everything’s really exciting. So exciting that i’m having to pinch myself. I can’t believe it.  I’m filled with *va vooom,* i’m armed with my Bee Venom moisturizer…

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(Thought i’d get that plug in there.. Lol…Venomskincare.co.uk… Follow all their socials. They do the BEST hydrating moisturizer… It is the best anti ageing moisturizer in all of the land…

And i’m on the way UP! I’m taking each day as it comes. I’m not looking to race folk to the finish line, and i’m doing it my way…which is right for me, as I run Wunna Land. 🙂

Welcome to my life…Thank you following it..,

As I told you in my last blog, ALL areas of my life are brimming with ‘Happy’ right now. Everything’s just great and sort of sprinkled with love and excitement. I feel really happy! It seems that in life….no matter what…. it all we really actually care about is being happy. (We look for that ‘happy’ buzz and try and find it everywhere…)

Why do people forget that…

Anyway, I watched a video today by Flora Tea Uk, (i’m obsessed with Japanese flowering teas, in case you didn’t know.) Anyway they were on Dragons Den and today i’m gonna write out the quotes that I read on their video, simply because they made me feel good… (If you don’t like quotes, shoot wine.)

It was the first thing I read this morning, after checking my Intsa, whilst still in bed…

‘Life doesn’t have to be perfect, to be beautiful.’

‘Remember that sometimes not getting what you want, is a stroke of luck.’

‘Happiness is easy….It’s an option you can choose..’

‘Beautiful is simple…You can just look around and find it.’

It made me want to buy tea….So I did. Then straight afterwards, 3 other companies gifted me with flowering teas, with a request to feature.

As a blogger & influencer, you are ‘gifted’ quite a lot…You are treated pretty well whenever you are out and about….(because they know you’ll blog your experience)…Yet, I WILL tell you that I personally, will only let a company or a brand ‘gift’ me ONCE

If I adore the product, place or brand, I’ll tell everyone, about it…They’ll usually then offer to ‘give you, give you’ more, more. HOWEVER, I know what it’s like to run a business and my manners are impeccable, unless i’m filled with cocktails…and I don’t believe it’s right for people to just take. So i’ll always THEN buy into the brand, unless it’s an actual paid partnership deal and well that’s a whole different story. That’s all money and decimal places. Collaborations are business deals at the end of the day, where two parties benefit.

Things are really great right now and because I decided to make a change towards the end of last year. I chose to do what I love…and went for it, because I wasn’t scared to.

It worked. I don’t know how? But I’m so happy.

OH MY GOD! How emotional was ‘Dancing on Ice’ last night! I was flipping crying!! Sat with my Mum, eating celery and crying. It made me cry so much that I Tweeted it out and ITV retweeted it, because they felt my pain. I was in bits. Good producing much!

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I can’t even watch it anymore….

Jake will win…and that’s that. It gets emotional when you’re on a reality show, because you can’t believe what you’ve been through, going through or achieved. It’s pressure, but it’s amazing.

It always gives you a story to tell and that’s what i’m about…That to me, is what life is about…That’s why i sometimes hate it when people don’t let me tell their part of MY story…if they have crossed paths with me.

AT the end of the day, it doesn’t matter. You’re gonna be 80 and be able to look back on this or your story and laugh out loud. It’s so important….

That’s why I love Lisa (as in Appleton,) we were in the loos at a charity event a few months ago, swigging her handbag cider and she said exactly that.

People are so scared of what others think… It’s a weakness, I tells ya! Enjoy your story! Live it!

FUCK WHAT ANYONE THINKS.

Away from that, i’ve had a busy, but wonderful weekend. It’s been filled with Ruby, Junior and family, and then dashed with work. I have a lot of opportunity right now and I just want to say…

THANK YOU

(I can’t believe it.)

I managed to go visit the newly refurbished Costa, at The Frenchgate Centre. I’m currrently doing a lot for my home town, where I was born, which is Doncaster, and it was a pleasure to meet everyone and enjoy a chilled out coffee and a wink… (I moved all the furniture, simply so I could do instagram pics…/LOL) 

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My mum was even laughing…

Mum: ‘I love how she doesn’t even care…She’ll just move everything herself and start pouting and posing like she’s on a full on shoot, like nobodies watching…but everybodies watching’

Me: ‘It’s my job!!! Is it making you feel weird? Lol. Take another pic, but do it from further back…Haha.’

I had a whole bunch of chocolate covered coffee beans, as in handfuls and handfuls…. and I don’t know what happened, but I was wired straight after that!!! I couldn’t even think…I was bouncing off walls.

Maybe they were magic beans?

Maybe i’m just a tool..

Right, i’ve got nothing else to say now, as I’ve i’ve got a ton of work to get through!

But I AM currently having a flashback of a time when I was in LA, hungover and booked on a modelling gig for a movie that morning. Two hours later I found myself sat in the very TOP carriage of a ferris wheel, in the blistering LA heat, with a hangover sweat, as movie filming was occurring above and below me and Danny Devito was waiting at the bottom of the ferris wheel for his scene.

What is my life…?

Happy Monday!

Follow me on everything….

It’s the rules.

 

 

2,444,877 Views Later….

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Happy Sunday! I’m having a manic weekend of birthday celebrations for my little girl Ruby. We take celebrations really seriously in Wunna land …Meaning, if there’s any excuse to have a good old *knees up*…WE WILL. That’s what life is about!

She’s manage to survive 7 delightful years on this planet, with ME as her Mother, bestie and life guide…and GOSH, I couldn’t love her any more! I cant even describe how I feel. She’s my absolute treasure. And yeah, she’s a bit sassy…But I expect anything that enters the world, via my ‘lady parts’ to have a bit of ‘ooh laa’ in their system. I’m surprised she didn’t rock out with a 2 for 1 cocktails in her hand.

However…ANYWAY…

…There’s a story to Ruby and her shimmie onto this Earth Ball.

SEVEN YEARS AGO…(It was my daughters actual birthday, yesterday….) I was an itv2 show with Peaches Geldof… being interviewed, because as I had tinkered off the ‘Paris Hiltons BBF’ show a year before…I had fallen pregnant…and I had chosen to be a ‘glammy mammy.’ 

I can’t remember who was around me or on that show??? But, I do remember that big furry animals, Mark Wright, and Dom Jolly, were also being interviewed.

It was my ACTUAL DUE DATE and ITV had paid for a TAXI to pick me up from my doorstep in Yorkshire and DRIVE ME ALL THE WAY to the studio doors in London, to film. It was a 4 hour journey! They’d been on the phone to me all day, because I kept ‘umming’ and ‘arrring…‘about heading to London.

Me: ‘I don’t know if I can come??? I’m not coming down on the train. What if I go into labour!!!! I’m not having a flipping train baby….’

ITV: ‘We’ll sort this out for you…and when you get to the studio, we’ll have a Doctor right there for you, on set. Everything’s sorted. Your hotel’s booked…We’ll get you here. We’ll look after you…Please come. You don’t have too…But COME. Lol.’

And because they couldn’t have looked after me better and because I’d worked with a lot of them recently…The taxi pulled up outside my home…I was 9 months pregnant and IT WAS MY DUE DATE(I had already filmed previously…a couple weeks before the show, for the background story) and dressed in a tracksuit…I jumped in the cab and it drove me all the way to ITV in London….

I arrived there an hour before I was due to film and it was all manic and crazy. I was SO WELL LOOKED AFTER, yet there were bright lights, dressing rooms, green rooms, hair, makeup and outfit changes, chats with the producers, greeting with Peaches and everyone rushing around me to make sure I was okay. In fact, everyone kept trying to feed me. Lol

‘Honestly, I’m fine. I feel like i’ve eaten a whole child.’

The rubbish part about it, was the fact that everyone got to enjoy all the booze in the Green Room…and I got to chill and watch everyone have fun.

*WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA*

Emma, who was also on the Hilton BBF show with me, on ITV2, was being interviewed on the show also. She was actually really lovely that night and rubbing my belly with ‘awws.’ But then she came out of her interview a bit narked off…

Ems: ‘They properly ripped me to shreds and it’s not fair. It’s alright for Chrissie, because she can take it and it’s what her brand IS! She’s fun and sassy…BUT they always make me look BAD and desperate and always make HER look good!!!!’

She’s a sensitive soul. Really lovely by nature. Yet, certainly get’s ripped into on interviews.

I was stood back stage, getting mic’ed up with my preggo bump before strutting down a giant catwalk for my interview. They were playing my VT to start egging the audience on…I was quite a controversial character during that time of my life…So you either ADORED ME MADLY, or HATED ME! It was kinda ‘showbiz’ at it’s finest.

They played the VT…I’m being filmed in the ‘Loose Women’ dressing room, i’ve having a spray tan, i’m being interviewed and dancing in front of a big red curtain on a dark lit stage and I’m rambling on about how i’d like to turn ‘just living life’ into a business, via my blog (which firstly I DID and secondly…they heavily promoted for me…) I had filmed all of this previously.

Anyway, the audience got all riled up and as they introduced me for my entrance, some of them CHEERED LOUDLY…and the rest of them BOOOOOOOOOOED, like their lungs couldn’t possibly *boo* anymore. 🙂

A member of the team just looked and me and smiled and showed me my stage entrance…I wet myself laughing and the *boos* looked back at him in a fit of giggles and said,

‘Cheers, you dick. Lol.’

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But Emma was right! I’m just made for it.

Half the audience loved everything that I stood for. Half of the didn’t like the fact that I was there on my due date, because I apparently should have been at home in my pj’s nesting, with my knitting. But i’m a hustler…What can I say? 😉

And I couldn’t have been looked after better. There was literally staff EVERYWHERE, incase my waters broke…ready to run in and save the day.

Secretly…ITV wanted me to go into Labour during my interview.

Me: ‘I know that you want me to go into Labour. Are you gonna start jumping out on me and scaring me, until my waters break?? Haha.’

This was an elevator conversation…Weirdly, I actually felt fine.I just knew Ruby wasn’t ready to come out yet…

Long story short….That night, Ruby didn’t pop out that night….I stayed over the evening in London, got home safely and even chilled a little, doing squats, eating pineapples and scaring myself, at my own mirror image….

When she did decide to *pop* out…It was filmed, moments of it were placed upon Youtube and just like that Ruby’s birth went VIRAL.

Obviously, I didn’t care about how ‘viral’ anything was at that time because I was in labour, having humans squeeze out of me…Yet, you know how you upload a video….(I wanted to look back and watch it, as it was the first time i’d ever had a baby and I also wanted to show Ruby the video when she was older…Plus, I live my life publicly, so sharing it on Youtube isn’t that much of an issue for me. It’s my job. Back in the day, it was seen as SO TABOO. Now, everyone’s doing it.) 

Anyway…

You know how you upload a video to Youtube and 100 people view it, then 400 people do…and over a 1000 people view it and you get all excited. I missed all that, I was recovering and having babies….

But my Mum walks into my hospital room, with refreshments and her phone in her hand…and says…

‘Chrissie….94,000 people have just watched your birthing video.’

There were loads of little snippets of the birth…Some were on 14,000 views, other’s on 81,000 views, some on 3,000 views and two that were on around 400,0000 views….

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I KNOW!!!

AND JUST LIKE THAT, WITHIN AROUND TWO HOURS….RUBY COMING INTO THE WORLD WENT VIRAL and over….

2,444,877 MILLION PEOPLE had at that point, viewed her arrival…

It was that crackers.

And at the time, loads of people said all sorts. Again, I didn’t care. I was so happy to be a new mum. I didn’t know that so many people would even watch it?

However, of course, due to the popularity of the videos…. with all of the love that came flooding in, I lot of ‘hate’ came a tumbling in also, as apparently it was so inappropriate of me, to upload my time in the labour room.

BLAH

In fact, months afterwards… all the hate’ did kinda make me feel a little weird and judged. I forgot to read the love.’ 

HOWEVER, let me tell you, YESTERDAY (my mum, dad, brother and the babies, all celebrated Ruby’s birthday at Sundown Adventure Land, which is one of her favourite places and I do want to thank ALL the staff there for being so utterly wonderful to us and making the day so special. We filmed parts of our day for you and placed them on my ‘social’ stories….They’re on my Insta, Facebook and Snapchat. Are you following them?) 

ANYWAY….Yesterday…..Ruby and I laid down in bed and I showed her the ITV2 show, and she watched a couple of the videos of her birth, that went viral and….

YOU SHOULD’VE SEEN HER BEAM! She did a face at me, like she couldn’t have felt more important. 😉

Ruby: ‘I can’t even believe that I was that special, that I was on the telly, in your belly and so many people watched me being born! Why do you look like a chipmunk?’

She said it so ‘7 year old’ and excited and understood every single part of it, as I told her the entire story from start to finish. She was fascinated. She threw her head back laughing and she just wanted to know everything about that moment….

So now….If i was ever in a situation where in which I was going to have another child….

I’d 100 PERCENT film it and upload it to Youtube…

I never know why so people are always scared of doing the things that feel so right or feel so normal, in case others judge them…when they’re not harming another single soul?

It’s weird that, isn’t it? So many people LIVE for what other people think! Why????  Like, I’m naturally someone who will not care about what ‘Joe Bloggs’ in Kansas thinks about my posts, if I’ve loved every single minute of it or chosen to do deliver it to the world. I’m someone who won’t even care, if someone close to me, a good friend, my mum, or if anyone disagrees with something that I am so passionate about. I’ll do it my way…always….IF, I think i’m right and if not, I’ll ask for help.

So, from my experience, I can tell you…

IN THE LONG RUN…

You will absolutely benefit from doing the things, that are TRUE to what YOU believe is right. The ones that smash it, don’t at all worry about the judgments of others. They go for it.

THEY LIVE THEIR VERSION OF LIFE PROUDLY AND WITHOUT FEAR. 

They don’t get caught up in what other people think of them, because they’re secure enough to stand their own ground.

Yet, the main reason why going with what YOU WANT TO DO, always works, is simply because it’s filled with utter love and over flown with your true passion.

When you do things out of love, wonderful things happen….

Don’t get it twisted 😉

 

 

Auditions, Daffodils & He’s Nothing Like Mary Poppins…

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I’ve a busy day today, so I’m gonna have to keep this sassy, brief and delightful! I’m auditioning and it’s stressful and mainly because I make it stressful. Lol. I put so much pressure on myself because I’m a lunatic. 🙂 (Code for: ‘I just want to do well and have all my dreams come true.’ We all do! But that’s the problem..In my world…everyone wants the same thing.)

Yipppeee!

But, you get what you get and you don’t get what the ‘The Gods’ believe isn’t right for you. I’m actually feeling quite good right now after Whatsapp messages to someone I hold in my highest regard.

I was all pathetic and nervous and trying to sort out my mindset… I’m honest, so i’ll tell anyone exactly how I feel about everything….and he swooshed on in with motivation at the exact right time.

He’s like Mary Poppins…but not nothing like Mary Poppins, AT ALL? Lol. (Bare with me…I’ve gone insane???) What, I’m trying to say is that he spoon fulled me the ‘truth sugar,‘ from one of the most positive angles and in order to gear me up for a ‘smash it,’ bonanza. He did it briefly and real. Not fakey and flourished. (It’s an attractive trait. Kinda made me want to ‘tickle his fancy.’ I love motivational people…not the ones that go on and on… for hours, but the ones that are real and tell you stuff from their own actual life experience…It’s sexy. It always makes me think they’re also really organised…and in the future….I imagine my Knight in Shining Armour to be dead organised….That way they can organise my scattiness.)

ANYWAY….. ( I got distracted…)

Just like that, I felt MIGHTY. The motivational medicine went down a treat…and sometimes it’s all you need…. and with a…

‘Good luck babe…you will smash it…’

I was sorted.

(Why am I currently getting a flash back of Junior misguiding his standup wee?)

‘GET IT IN THE LOO!!! It’s spurting on the floor!’

Monday was great because I got to hang with my girl bestie ‘Firmonnell.’ Miss you Monday turned ‘real life’ and we got to catch up and chat about our world’s combined, as people played with blue and white balls around us and other’s decided to ski.

I always miss her madly, so when we talk, we talk….We get lost it in with a passion. There was a moment where in which we had gotten so ENTHRALLED in our conversation, whilst stood up by a coffee counter…that we forgot we were stood up by a coffee counter and were suddenly awaken by the Barista with a…

‘Do you want chocolate sprinkles on that?’

‘Eh?’

‘Oh shit! Yeah..’

‘Why are you not using the sugars I got you?’

‘I thought they were yours?’

‘What…EIGHT OF THEM.’

‘Let’s sit down..’

Good catch up…Then our other friend ‘Hustle Barbie’ tried to steal my Bestie from me, by presenting her with Daffodils and kindness.

Firmonnell: ‘Hustle’s my new bestie now! She bought me this..’

(Produces photo of daffodils and other loving thoughtful stuff.)

Me: EWW! Why is she stealing my bestie! How dare she be thoughtful. That’s fine. you two can go have a really delightful Vegan time together. I’ll make new friends, with like… Olivia off Love Island.’ Fucking Daffodils.’

Firmonnell: ‘What you buying me?’

Me: ‘Don’t you dare try and game me with the *WHAT YOU BUYING ME’ trick.’

(I’m scarred! It’s not like I haven’t already been on the flipping telly… where I was put through HUGE challenges every single moment of every single day, with a camera in my face…in the name of ‘Hilton.’ Touchy subject, a friendship battle..innit.) 

Anyway, great day with ‘Firmonnell.’

‘See you next week? I’m parked over there…’

Me: ‘Can you at least MAKE LIKE YOU NEED ME…’

Miss you Monday’s‘ are the best!

I’ve actually really super dooper need to go! Shit! My hair needs doing. Just wanted to say..

THANK YOU SO MUCH..

To everyone who is engaging with Wunna Land. My ‘Socials’ have been a delight and i’m grateful. It kinda makes me feel all appreciated. Thank you to those watching my ‘Garden gallop’ video gram. So many people have messaged me asking if it was my actual garden? Random question?

But…yes…I’m not going to gallop, open shirt topless in someone else’s garden. Lol. Well? I might? Depends on where life takes me?

Just quickly, I’ve also noticed that people are getting into ‘banter spats’ on my Facebook Fan Page….Just so you know…regardless. I adore y’all! If it wasn’t for your engagements…this land would not be worth it..and I never take that for granted.

It’s pretty rubbish weather today. It’s almost like the skies can’t decide what to do? I want Summer, or at least Spring to shimmie on in now. I don’t like this inbetweeny weather. I’m not grey. I’m not a fence sitter. I need a choice. It effects my outfits. 😉

Before I tinker off…The other day, after a shoot, I stopped to have a chitter with one of my good friends Scott…It was a phone interview and I was sat in my car, at night, in my pyjamas…. But please to click below and take a listen….We’re talking celeb gossip, my time on the Hilton show, ‘behind the scenes’ glamour modelling and my dating life..

I’ve godda go!

Thank you for following my life….

Chrissie x

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Panic Buttons, Good News & That Little Bit Of Pressure…

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I’m at Waterstones in Doncaster. In the cafe, blogging. I’m wedged between two lovely and nattering grannies, who are nibbling crumpets, an edgy chick, who’s hiding under a black beanie, (she’s either having a bad hair day or just wants to hide from Thursday…I do it with sunglasses….If i’m inside and have them on, I think no one can see me… 😉 ) and there’s a spinning tower of ‘Mr Men’ books. ‘Little Miss Tiny‘ has fallen off the spinning tower.

The genius that invented those books, (he’s probably sunning it in Marbs right now) is literally fabulous. I mean, ‘Little Miss Tiny.’ It’s just a tale about someone right tiny, who can’t reach shit. It’s brilliant! Lol.

But anyway, back to Wunna Land.

I AM BUSY!

It’s a super busy time…and I let myself get a little stressed this morning. I forgot to find ‘solutions,’ craved a 10am Mimosa, but didn’t have one…and as Wunna Land is becoming increasing popular, opportunities a wiggling in galore.

THANK GOD! I FEEL LIKE I’VE WORKED SO HARD. I’M KNACKERED. I couldn’t be MORE GRATEFUL! COME! COME! PLEASE COME!

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There’s so much that I want to achieve this year and I guess I ‘hit’ panic button… A button that no one really enjoys too ‘hit.’ But I’m actually okay now, because my little Oriental ‘tough love’ Mother pulled me back into shape.

‘You’re being rubbish at focusing on the positive today. Everything’s fine. Stop panicking. Get the work done!’

I’m great now and I actually received a good news DM yesterday, which made me all hopeful. I like the giddiness that comes along with the feeling of ‘hope.’ All you can do is ‘give something ya all,’ smash it the best way that you can….and hope for the best. The rest is out of your control. That’s down to ‘life magic.’

(Someone’s just posted on my Facebook Fan Page, under my usual picture of the day..He’s commented with a GIF of a young man looking impressed, and with the words that read ‘Helloooo Beautiful,’ flashing across it. I’ve replied with a ‘Thank you ever so much’ because I appreciate the love, be it sent from the heart…. or the penis. However, the GIF is actually of my ex husband…Lol….So it was quite unfortunate picking really.)

Cheers!

I’ll have to delete it or he’ll get arsey. (Who still gets arsey about things that happened in a previous DECADE. Honestly! It’s 2018, where we’re all ‘loving the Universe,’ and sending forgiveness vibes for good karma and stuff. Arsiness is 2000 and late. Don’t do it. The most attractive people are the ‘smilers.’ Even a sneaky snigger of a smile, is incredibly attractive. Not just the ‘squeaky clean, make fresh pie dumplings, by daffodils’ kinda smile.

(What the **** are ‘Fresh Pie Dumplings??’ Lol)

But yes, enjoying the love.

Can you believe that I’ve actually booked a campaign where I get to wear a padded coat! I even sent ‘a lovely’ a message yesterday saying,

‘WHEN YOU BOOK A CAMPAIGN THAT YOU ACTUALLY GET TO WEAR CLOTHES ON…’

‘Hahahahahaha, love it.’

Then he ignored me when I said, that I’d gone from ‘slutty‘ to ‘wifey material‘ in the space of a white bomber jacket.

Saying that, and in general, I really do think this is true….If I was a guy, I’d always have a really beautiful ‘saucy looking’ wife. I’d be secure and confident enough to have a chick like that. Some guys aren’t.

TRUE STORY

Here’s me in clothes for new brand Attitude Avenue! I’m their new  model/face and Influencer and hey they chose well! 😉

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You can actually buy that white padded jacket. You can go to their instagram. It’s also on mine. (Do know that there is more than ’12 likes’ on it now…Lol)

ATTITUDE AVENUE.

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But yes, all the auditions, all the collabos, all the work, all the opportunites and lots of things in the ‘hopeful’ bag of tricks. I’m gonna do well because i’m DETERMINED TOOOOO. Lol. I’m like a power rash. I keep coming back. (Ooh the itches.)

I feel lucky. I know I still goddit. I don’t feel by any means ‘passed it.’ I ain’t over any hill yet, but mainly because I don’t climb hills. 😉 Infact, if anything, I feel at my MOST DYNAMIC. 

SO LET’S PLAY!

TEAM WUNNA LAND!

(Can you cheer here because it’ll make me feel better.) 

Do wish me luck, because you’re following my diary all around the world and I don’t want to balls it all up. I’m in that moderately ‘stressy’ phase of the entertainment business, (people only ever see the result,) where in which I’m ‘auditioning.

It’s the… ‘You want it, you can get it, but you haven’t got it yet’ phase. Infact, no, it’s not stressy. I’m POSITIVE. That’s the wrong word. What i’m saying is… right now, I’m under pressure. A pressure that I put MYSELF UNDER. But it’s good, because then i’ll focus and perform well. I’m not worrying about the things I can’t control, I’m just making sure I give my bit, 100 PERCENT! 

Wish me luck.

COME ON WUNNA!

Hopefully you’re going to be very  surprised this year…Pleasantly surprised…as I did work hard last year, meaning this year there will be a few ‘Wunna Treats’ for you, that you knew nothing about. But like a said, a lot more has come through and I couldn’t be more excited. I’m not really nervous. I’m confident. I just…

WANT! 🙂

You know when I told you not to ‘want‘ because craving things were bad for you and that more people should be happy with their ‘represent’ their ‘where they are now.’

Scrap that…

Desire and Ambition is sexy…. Lol.

Ps/ I’ve just got a message from my mate…’Jonesez.’ He’s moaning because…Well this is what he said…(i’ve had to ******* out their name because we’re slagging our actual acquaintance off, Lol.)

Jonesez: ‘I was properly impressed with your new photoshoot, weird seeing you back in actual clothes..’ ********* is doing my head in.’

Me: ‘Lol, yeah I forgot that I even wore them… Why whats ********* doing?’

Jonesez: ‘Just talking to me unnecessarily all the time…’

HAHAHAHAHAH.

 

 

9am Prosecco Rules, Trench Coats & Photoshoots

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Good morning my delicious Cherry Pies! How are you? I’m feeling great. I’m feeling productive and i’m finally getting my priorities straight. I sometimes wander off that little path of ‘focus,‘ when ‘adventure’ gets the better of me.

But today, i’m all ‘Career First.‘ (I’m always ‘Family’ so that goes without saying.) But, I guess what i’m saying is, that boys…come secondary to that.

BOOYAH! *AIR KISSES HERE.* Girl Power!

Sammi P: ‘You’re almost there. Don’t mess it up right now, by getting emotionally entangled in things that distract you from staying focused.’

Me: ‘Can we have Prosecco at 9am? Is that reasonable?’

Sammi P: ‘Yes. We’ll have to hide.’

Me: ‘We can’t hide, because that’s so *alcoholicy.* We have to own it and embrace it, like it’s completely fine. I want a 9am prosecco by a roaring fire place….Where can I do that?’

Sammi P: ‘I wish you weren’t such a love bunny. Man up! YOU ARE ALMOST THERE. Anyone that truly cares about you, will understand that, understand you and will always be there.’

Me: ‘I’m 37 not 19. I know that, you plank. Shit, I can’t do Prosecco. I’ve got a brand phone call thing in an hour and I told *Big A* from ‘House of Solo’ that i’d meet him for coffee after I’ve blogged.’

Sammi P: ‘You can do it at 1pm.’

Me: ‘Audition..’

Sammi P: You have no time for me ‘Hollywood.’

Let’s have some fun now. We’ve all nearly got through January, which is always a rubbish month. But I actually recieved some really great news last night before bed…so I’m technically quite chipper! Therefore I need you to be too!

I love good news before bed….You sleep like a baby.

But really how are you all? How’s Monday? Is not as bad as you think! I used to hate Mondays. I love them now. Monday’s rock with bells on.

But d’ya know what doesn’t…trying to find a trench coat, red heels and the right foundation. (I’m an Estee Lauder ‘Double Wear’ user…I just like foundation options.) Anyway, that was yesterday’s mission. I didn’t find a trench coat or GOOD red heels. It’s for a shoot, that i’m directing MYSELF. And I love the ones that I direct myself because they’re always sooo ‘tell a story.’ 

Obviously, if you’ve been on my ‘socials’ of recent. You will have witness the fact that there are quite of a few ‘sexy,’ some may say ‘suggestive’ pictures, that i’ve either taken myself, had taken, shot…and posted up.

Everybodies engaging with them. They’re getting a of interest from the gents…The odd bit of interest from the Ladies… But I just wanted to make sure that the pics don’t make you girls feel odd. They shouldn’t because i’m evil, i’m not remotely ‘slappery’ and if anything, i’m all about embracing your body, enjoying the way you look, expressing confidence, without arrogance and more importantly, embracing and expressing the way you FEEL. It’s the way I see beauty, it’s my version of it….I’m a ‘creative’ by nature…so I kinda see it as ‘being arty.’

So, don’t let it feel weird, as I love all your feeds, all your pics, I love looking into your lives…But I get it. because the other day, the most beautiful Italian model ever, appeared on my newsfeed, fully naked, rolling around in a wine cellar. I adored the photo. I loved it. I loved her. But it did make me feel…’

*Waaaaaaaaaa.*

I guess, she tested my emotional security level a little? Lol. She’s beautiful. What a girl. I want to roll around naked in a wine cellar and look like that! It was a GREAT shot. I actually shoot with the same photographer shortly for a popular magazine and i’m quite nervous…because I feel like he’s shot some of the worlds’ most amazing models…and they’re models of the ‘glamour’ variety…and well I don’t want him to think i’m shit.

Photog: ‘You’re a strong model, a popular model and a TYPE. We’ll shoot Monday. I fly into London at the weekend from Vegas…I’ve booked you in. If i thought you were shit, I wouldn’t waste my time..’

So yes, lots going on…

But i’ve got to dash….Please follow all my ‘socials’ and stories! I have got some career surprises coming up for you next month!

Twitter: chrissiewunna

Instagram: chrissiewunna

Snapchat: chrissiewunna1

Facebook: http://www.facebook.com/chrissiewunnadotcom

Right, i’ve got to go. I’ve got a meeting with ‘House of Solo’ Magazine.

Thank you for following my diary!

Kisses,

Chrissie

Swag, Fire & Japanese Living Rooms

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I was laid in bed at 2am this morning, Googling ‘Japanese Living Rooms?’ It was dark. I was naked. I couldn’t sleep because my mind was a swirling with, let’s say ‘solutions.’ (The good thing about me, is that if there’s a problem…a big one…I am really good at finding OUR strength in YOU, evoking my kitten strength and with ‘fire’ creating a more positive solution. I get it from my Mama. Sometimes we do Versace rings, other times we do solutions.)

So, i’d had this brilliant day with Ruby and Junior and The Wunnas. We shopped, we lunched, we movie watched a home…(Karate Kid with Jaden Smith in) and the children were a DREAM. I couldn’t even believe how flipping good they were! I even kept having to TELL them how good they were because, I couldn’t at all believe it!

Ruby: We’re just really happy …’

AWWWW!

(When you’re a Mum. You LOVE HEARING THAT!)

I couldn’t be too bothered with tending to all my ‘socials,’ yesterday, as I do it all week long…I needed a moment off and you never get a moment off….So I posted a quick ‘throw back’ picture, that I actually really love…and got on with my family day.

YIPPPEEEEEEEEEEE! BEAMING!

Balance is everything.

(So if prosecco.)

Brilliant day. Superb! I am the luckiest glamour puss alive and i’m steaming ahead with work, feeling FREE, embracing opportunity and just really enjoying life at 37. It’s easy. But anything you love, or anything that fits you like a glove (be it in work or love) is simple. There’s no stress. No hassle. I like no stress and no hassle.

So, I’m happy.

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Around, 9pm, we’re all at mine, settled, chilling and scattered around the home. The kids are in pj’s. I’m in my comfies, which is pj bottoms and just a bra. It’s either that…or just pj bottoms. I’m not really bothered about hiding behind a million layers.. I’m body confident. I even love my wibbly bits, that shouldn’t really be wibbly. I might not be ‘Vogue’, but i’m alright. I’ll live. 🙂

Do KNOW that BOTH my children are body confident because of my ‘no quarms’ attitude to my own body. I guess, I accidentally taught them that. (Saying that, I also taught them to be ‘Divas,’ which isn’t one of my best qualities.)

Anyway, around 8 pm, my mum’s still at mine and she slowly walks, whilst reading a text, upstairs to m room to deliver some ‘awkward news.’ She thought it was bad news. I did for a second. It actually made me grumpy for a moment because she had passed it on the ‘worry parcel,’ (as I like to call it.)

I dropped that ‘parcel’ straight away because it’s not what i’m about. I’ll find a solution with a smile and move it forward with ‘gusto.’ I’m the most flexible, really prepared human being. Lol

My Mum’s really blunt, so she’ll just ‘say it out…’ like I would… I liek that about her. There’s not jigger pokery. Just the facts.

Plus, I hate it when people over ‘dramatize’ situations. I say it all the time, y’know…when they make a ‘mountain out of a molehill.’ They only either do it because their own life lacks a ‘thrill,‘ they’re just dull, weak, or they want attention. Lol. That’s my Prosseco theory!

I once dated a boy, who always did that and it annoyed me SO MUCH…that I left him. I can’t stand it that much. 🙂 I just believe that strong people find solutions. We share strength. (My chick friends will tell you..I am awful at sympathy. Hahaha.) Find your swiggedy swag!

Long story short…

I believe everything DOES happen for a reason…So after a moment to myself, a big old think….I marched downstairs with my ‘solution’ face on and my positive ‘I’ve got this Mum’ vibe, in full force.

I’m good like that!

I gave some really big SPEECH. Like I was some kind of Locker Room coach and my team was getting beat…then I wrapped it up with charm, love and ‘so this is what we’re doings…’ and just like that….everyone slept well.

I laid awake until 2am. Haha Maybe, I talk shit and just take on other peoples stress for them?

In a second, we were sorted. Bad news, was turned into good, to the point where I dare say that I’m excited. I can’t tell you about it yet…but it involves a ‘doer upper.’ Basically, I was just sick of ‘silly dallying’ around and letting someone try to ‘Rule The Roost.’ I took it into my own hands and now it’s getting sorted.

*Cya Doll!*

Wunna is SWAG!

God, I had some much stuff to tell you, but instead i’ve rambled on about all that! But yes, that’s how I ended up Googling ‘Japanese living rooms.’ I couldn’t sleep, because my mind was POSITIVELY busy. I was actually gonna Snapchat the fact that I couldn’t sleep…but whenever I do, everyone messages me frantically because they can’t sleep either…Makes me phone buzz, literally every second, which keeps me up even more. Lol.

I’m loving Sunday. I hope you are too! I’m on my newsfeed and everyones now engaged or getting married. Even flipping Ed Sheran!

GO ON! GOOD BOY!

Someone inboxed me a poem this morning…So I’m saving the read for this afternoon. It’s the same guy who follows me on Instagram, a Wunna Land Fan…He sent me the other one previously, which I posted in my blog. I liked it. It was lovely of him.

I love a poem! Even if it’s just ‘comedy.’

I also recieved the most beautiful card all the way from one of my Gay guy besties in LA, THEO…who i’ve known for 10 years. He is one of my BEST BEST FRIENDS. He sent me the card,just to remind me that he ‘loves’ me and ‘misses’ me…I’ll tell you all about it in my next post, as I need to head off to buy foundation and find breakfast.

I love that my other LA guy friend ‘Tarik,’ (he actually hosted a show called ‘Flab to Fab’ years ago in LA, that a ‘before he was super famous’ Perez Hilton was on. Anyway, Tariks all buff, married and funny. He used to always have a soft spot for Me or any chick really and he’d continuously lean over the gym counter attempting to whisper ‘sweet nothings,’ at me, like I was his world….

Tarik: ‘Bitch, you should love me.’

Me: ‘Hahah. Get lost dude. I don’t. You need to go back to Romance Camp.’

Anyway, he was asked to turn the music up louder, in his home, so it felt like a ‘party party.’ ONLY IN LA, will you hear a guy, before a music turn up, utter the words,

‘GIRL, HOLD MY PROTEIN SHAKE…’

Right, i’m off.

I need foundation.

I hope you love Sunday toooooooooo!

Chrissie x

 

 

Dreams Come True, Success & My Sassy Little Fan Page

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I was driving through Badsworth, this morning, the air was fresh..a little nippy, yet weirdly warm. The January skies were filled with a wistful smokiness…a lightness of glee, that glistened with beams of bright whiteness. The sun was calm, yet radiated over my little patch of Yorkshire, with a burst of strength that could only ever be described as happiness.

Right now, I feel like the happiest and the luckiest girl in the world. I might not have everything, but what I do have is just amazing. We kinda spend so much time stressing over the things that we DON’T HAVE, that we forget to really look, step back and appreciate the things that WE DO HAVE going on in our lives, don’t we?

However, saying that…Please do LIVE, take chances and gambles where it’s worth it and only do the things that make your heart bloom with passion. If you’re stuck in something that isn’t right, that isn’t gonna get you, to that place where you finally sit back, kick off ya shoes, breathe and relax with happiness… Then it’s not worth it.

You’ll know if somethings right, because you’ll feel it. Your gut instinct is the most powerful tool you have. You’ll know if somethings right because you’ll love it, you’ll feel passion for it…be it a job, a lifestyle…or someone you care about…and that passion will never ever go away…

Life will always lead you right back there….Right back to it…Right back to them….

So, yes…RIGHT NOW, I might not have everything, my heart ever wished for, but still, i’m the luckiest and happiest kitten in the world. I’ll get there, when i’m meant to…

I’ve worked hard through my life and GOD, so much has happened! Bad shit! GREAT SHIT. It’s been filled with swashes of madness and ‘colour’…I’ve had the most remarkable ‘UP’s,’ the most hilarious ‘downs’ and  the most unbelievable ‘samba’ of achievements.

Right now, it feels like it’s only just the beginning….and I have no clue why, as i’ve been knocking about for ages! Lol. I’m not someone who doesn’t feel accomplished. I’m happy with my ‘tick sheet.’ I’m loving my time back here. I adored growing up in LA. Entertainment has been my life, my passion and because.. good or bad, it a job that makes people ‘feel’ and I love that.

I always tell you when i’m not doing well. I write this diary honestly. I might miss out bits, that I keep to myself personally, yet over an ‘almost’ decade, I’ve pretty much told you everything.

I’ll tell you now…

I’m doing REALLY WELL..

..and i’ve always done alright…Right now, I’m doing really well.

Finally at 37, that Wunna ship is magically a sailing and I am celebrating merrily, with cocktails and a shocked ‘can’t even believe it’ face. I took a chance on a new chapter…and I proved to myself that only doing the things that make you happy is where your success lies. Dreams come true!

SO, I’LL WELCOME YOU TO WUNNA LAND.

MY LAND.

Bring a bottle… 😉

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Why do I keep being so ‘preachy?’ I guess, i’m feeling motivational? I think it’s because I read Tila Tequila’s moronic speech on how homophobia, porn and all people who wear makeup should perish in hell. It’s apparently ‘sorcery’…the ‘Devils’ work and she then went on to state how happy she would be, if everyone of the above ‘label’ DIED She proudly states that she says prayers wishing for that to happen… every single night…

Erm…? That’s not really polite, now is it? Nice and cheery! Good work Tila! What an idiot!

It just made me realise that when you have a voice, an audience….it’s really important to use that voice positively, in good humour, or in hope to inspire…where no harm is caused.

I get that she’s been through a hard time in life. I get it. Infact I know exactly what she’s been through. I know what LA Life is like, I know what being in the glamour modelling industry is like. I know what entertainment is like…I get it. But that girl,  has completely lost her mind and needs help….Needs love. I’m just not in the mood to give her any…. 🙂

I probably need a wine to chill my ‘high horse’ a second. But when horses are high, you might as well stay saddled.

(Saddled? Is that a thing? I know nothing about horses?? I only know that my Mum used to take me horse riding on Saturday’s when I was 7, until I gave it up for dancing school…and the ONLY OTHER time a horse came into my life, was when I accidentally found my LA roommates ‘porn drawer.’ He had a whole DVD dedicated to hot chicks having sex with horses…? He was a lawyer… 🙂 ) 

Thank you for all the love, i’m getting on my ‘socials.‘ I love the Wunna Fan Page banter on Facebook. There’s tons of gents that we leave me messages all day and i’m grateful for it, as i love it when people engage with that I’m doing…Yet, my REAL LIFE guy friends, who are WONDERFUL and who i’ve known since I was a teenager…have started ‘chirping in’ when they believe that the people looking into Wunna land,‘ are in sudden need of acold, COLD shower.’

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I think ‘Reuben’ once gave someone a lesson in chat up lines and referred to someone as a bit of a ‘perv.’  ‘Tomfri’ (only yesterday) gave someone a spelling test…and also decided to make sure ‘Jase the Wunna fan‘ knew his chat up line was less than ‘champion..’

‘Tom Pinto :  @Jase Tennant Smooth as Egyptian whiskey mate…’

My Facebook fanpage is brilliant. I spend my entire day on it replying to everyone…It needs it’s own show…without me in it! I have the best fans…They’re just such characters. They’re great! They even get into their own verbal fights in my comment stream…and I have to tell them to ‘play nicely.’ Everyone’s really complimentary…and i’m not gonna lie…It’s kinda a nice thing to wake up to and read every morning.

It makes me smile…

Every morning before 9am, I feel SO appreciated after a good old ‘comment read’ session. It’s a good way to start your day. It could be worse…and I know that from experience. So, I’m not complaining. I’m enjoying it!

I feel freee….

Right, I’m headed to bed now…It’s my Mum’s birthday in the morning, I’ve got a bunch of photos to post online and a jimble fo collabos to read through….I have a shoot tomorrow and I’ve got to get sorted for an audition, that I’m excited for!

Dreams come true. Miracles happen. Examples of such are around us constantly. They’re happening every single minute of every single day!

Notice them happening and know that it can happen to you toooo!

Kisses,

Chrissie

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Robot Husbands, Sex & Miracles..

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Today has been one of those ‘miracle‘ kinda days. I haven’t been able to believe the luck that i’ve had, but i’ve been so grateful for it. I was little galloping around, doing *happy* dances, to no music and total strangers…who definitely now think i’m a lunatic.

I kinda started being positive, after a couple days of feeling worried (cos we do get worried don’t we?) Yet, just like magic, with a *wangle* of a wand and a little bit of a *wink*CONSECUTIVELY amazing things just started to happen….one at a time…ALL morning and hopefully. I even had a prosecco and let my eyes ‘fill up’ a little with glee.

Things aren’t always shit. Remember that. So if you’re going through a case of ‘da blues’ and I really hope you’re not…always remember it IS TEMPORARY. 

You’ve got a whole life to live and no one to answer to.

LIVE IT!

So, I’ve got a lot of shoots lined up and it’s all really exciting. I’m writing. I’m loving the blog and well i’m a ‘show girl’ at heart, meaning shoots are my forte. I love them. I live them…I just find it really fun.

(Hang on a second…I’ve just sat on a pocket rock. No…not a ‘pocket rocket,..’ 😉 that’s a whole different blog post… Junior..The littlest Wunna in all the land…my 4 year old son…Well, he gave every WUNNA in the family a rock , a stone each. They’re ones that he had found on his journies of being Junior. We all actually carry a rock around with us, at ALL times for good luck…I’ve just sat on mine. It’s jiggery jaggery and it KILLS!) 

This morning, I posted a whole bunch of photos and a video on all my ‘socials’ on me waking up…I’m not gonna lie. I did film it yesterday to post out today. I even sent it to someone last night before it went ‘live.’ Lol.

Image may contain: one or more people and close-up Image may contain: 1 person, smiling, selfie, phone, indoor and close-up

Image may contain: 1 person, selfie Image may contain: 1 person, selfie, phone and indoor

Anyway, before 11am (it’s now noon) on my Facebook Fanpage the video had 13,000 views. And the thing that’s been so hilarious about the video is the simple fact that it weirdly shocked people?

I post a lot of pictures…sexy ones…because they’re MY favourite. I post them…People seem to like them, they certainly engage with them and I spend my entire day replying to comments (mainly to gents) around the merry world.

I put my pictures up first and the viewers of Wunna Land, went ahead and ‘liked‘…they ‘commented…’ they ‘engaged.’ It’s always pretty fast on my Facebook..almost like fire….which leads them to a ‘click’ onto my diary, this website…so they can find out more.

But as I posted my video, it was like everything *paused* for a second…Everyone tucked their ‘willies’ back in… put on their Sunday bests, got terrified, realized that I AM actually a REAL LIFE human. and not just a picture on their news feed, or a paragraph on a blog post, that they ‘maybe’ place as some kind of ‘social fantasy….’ (Hahaha. Listen to me talking about myself like i’m some kinda Queen of the world 😉 )

…AND THEY PANICKED.

It all became very real, very quickly…and my inbox has been inundated with the weirdest messages, from people who were shocked that i’m real???

I’M SO CONFUSED?

Who’dya think writes this blog? Lol

I post my own selfies…IT IS ME?

I just thought everyone was going to adore me…Lol…Yet, everyone was more shocked, than anything. And the video’s just morning ‘wake up and stretch’ video? It’s chilled. It’s glamourous. It’s me. (It’s also on my ‘Instagram’ so you can go see it there. 🙂 🙂 Follow me too, because growing an instagram following is harder than...(‘I’ll let you fill in something hard, I can’t think of anything right now…’

But yes, record straight. I’m actually a real life person. I know! How scary! No ones even talking to me today on ‘Insta’...like Twitter…. I’ll just have to wait until the American’s wake up and throw me some..

‘Hey Honey, Love the pics.’

I don’t really have anything else to say, other than the fact that you should totally believe in miracles. I’ve had the most remarkable morning. Eat clean. I’ve been eating ‘fresher than fresh’ and it has served my body delightfully. It’s the cleanest, sexiest rush of goodness. I’m glowing.

I’m also getting really worried because y’know I told you about that woman who married the ghost pirate because he didn’t believe she would ever find a good man….Well, last week i read an article that Robot Husbands were going on sale, so we can purchase and program our futures as women.

Now, I love all social development and I adore the amazing things that the world delivers,

YET, LET’S NOT BE IDIOTS.

Let’s find our *SWAG* a second. (Yes guys, there’s Robot Wives also.)

Surely everyone knows that love isn’t about robots and programming? Surely everyone believes that in the end, they’ll find their perfect match.It’s all about fate, timing and true love. Some find it faster than others…but it’s definitely not a race. Surely everyone in the world is NOT THAT LONELY!!!

I mean can you imagine ME, in my flipping living room listening to some Robot Husband, that i’ve had to get dressed and plonk on some chair, telling me that he ‘loves’ me, whilst we enjoy a homemade skinny cocktail together and watch ‘Dancing on Ice,’ as the kids look at me like i’ve finally COMPLETELY LOST THE PLOT. I mean they’re already like..

Ruby: ‘Can’t wait until I’m married and move to LA, so you don’t moan at me for not going to bed on time.. When are we gonna have a proper family…’

Junior: ‘If you ever get a Prince…Like a real daddy…don’t let him touch your boobs, cos they’re mine.’

And then even worst….when it comes to the ‘nookie’ part of the relationship…The part that as a 37 year old I actually adore. I’m sensual by nature…

CAN YOU IMAGINE ME, HAVING TO UNDRESS MY BLOODY ROBOT, DO SEXY EYES AND BECKONS AT HIM, (whilst he just sits there spewing out his..‘yeah baby you’re hot’ lines that i’ve programmed into him

… AND THEN HAVING TO CLAMBER ON TOP OF HIM FOR SEX. YES WITH MY REAL LIFE ROBOT HUSBAND…

WHAT THE ACTUAL…

Wunna land says it’s a no go….

I even had a conversation with my chick friend ‘Jilly G’ about it..

Jilly G: ‘It’s just like a man shaped dildo.’

Me: ‘No it’s fucking not. It’s not a dildo AT ALL. It has eyes. Creepy ROBOT EYES. My dildo’s don’t have eyes? Do yours?

Jilly G: ‘No..Lol..They don’t speak either..’

Me: ‘Oh? I might have one that speaks? Haha.’

Bottom line…I’ll wait it out, marry a ghost pirate, order 100 cats and cry myself to sleep before I EVER INVEST IN A ROBOT HUSBAND.

Love you,

Chrissie x

 

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