Breakups, Puddings & Messages…

Last night was fun!! It started with work and quiet moments of blogging. I had half a Peroni, as my merry bit of company. I usually always order that if i’m at my local pub. I don’t even know why? It’s just easy. I’d worked all day. I’d juggled the kids. Mcdonalds got the better of me. (Who knew that they did ‘table service’ now?)

Then an hour zoomed by, at the speed of light.

My pink laptop slammed shut and as the late afternoon kicked in, I sat with friends and just let life take over. Sometimes, that’s all you need to do and I usually hate it when people try to ‘fight the feeling.’ It means they’ve lost their sense of child like ‘adventure.’

My favourite time, is when day turns to night….It’s even better over a tipple.

(I always want to be proposed to, when day turns to night. The reason for that, is simply because it’s such a sexy part of the day for me. It feels really real. It’s exciting, but chilled, all at the same time.)

So, I’m working a lot right now, so i’m making sure I fit in family, rest and fun with friends, whenever I can, really? Today was meant to be quite busy. Yet, I have the whole of Eat Leeds, next week…So I switched things around to chill with the babies today.

IT’S BEEN A STRESSY ONE & NO ONE IS THROWING ME A BONE.

But, next week I’ll be kitty tottering to almost every single swanky bar/restaurant in Leeds city centre. I’m certainly gonna need a good litter of energy for that.

I’m excited through! Who wouldn’t be!! I’m lucky.

Last night was a good time. It was filled with laughter. The bantery kind. Where people were put together to just have some fun! I’m having lots of good times recently. Leeds, last week, was a really good time. My moments of escapism, are always filled with pleasure.

It started off with KatyP and I rambling on to ‘Golfer Jonny’ about how we could never EVER be in a SEX LESS relationship. And I really couldn’t, I’d DIE. I’m no ‘nympho.’ I’m far more in control than that. Yet, when I fancy a guy, ‘Ooooooooooooooh’ do I fancy him…So if I ever have an ‘object of my desire,’ he is usually in for a treat. 😉

At 37, I LOVE a bit of nookie.  I’m a fully grown girl. I love my body and I love to give love and feel loved in return. So, if I had a partner and we’d decided to shimmie through life together, under a flag reading ‘FOREVER.’ I’d chose one with a ‘sexy disposition.’ I’d want him to be in to a bit of the ‘ooh laa.’

I was sat with a guy friend, who was waiting for his bets to roll in, as he showed me pictures of a cocktail, a salsa dancer and a bottle of wine , on his laptop.

Dude: ‘Did you think I did a good job?’

Me: ‘Yeah, yeah.’

Then Ms.Derry (who I adore) sauntered in, with KatyS, on the hunt for a pudding. Who honestly hunts for pudding??? Haha. The lost third course!! They crack me up!

I mean, they got their pudding, after searching MILES for a bit of cake.

‘We’re just three course girls and Electric theatre wouldn’t give us a pudding. We even went to Ego, but we were too late there. So we ended up here.’

(I love Northern girls. ‘Derry’ got chocolate cake and custard. Then fed it to my guy friend, who had initially mocked her pudding choice. I do love custard, but I hate a passing spoon feed, because i’m a total germaphobe. The worst thing anyone could do, is share a spoon. Lol It’s like when people suck a lolly and pass it on to another being for a suck. It’s awful. I’d die.) 

Ms.Derry’s  now fresh and single, after ‘pieing off’ a fifteen year relationship. But the great thing about her is,  that just like ‘Firmonnell’ and I…she’ll simply get on with the next chapter merrily, with a smile and a wink, without moaning.

She’s a fun one and she’s amazing and like we were saying last night, if you are a boy, who is ‘VANILLA,‘ dashed in bland, then we’re far too tasty for ya! Lol. Yet, it’s always the tasty girls, that the boys chase. 😉

My guy friend, sat and learnt about chicks pretty fast…

It’s weird, because this year…has been a year of BREAKUPS. I’ve kinda loved it, as NOW, so many new people are crossing paths and so many new people, now have the opportunity to give a fresh version of life, a go!

A new start is always wonderful!

(People who don’t like them are only scared.) 

Then just as ‘Derry’ was talking about my love life and saying..

Derry: ‘You’ll get it right, the next time around..’

Me: ‘Yeah! Yeah! I’ll definitely get married again, in the future. I’ll get it right, in the end.’

Derry: ‘You’re always so secretive about your relationships.’

…my phone *pinged* and ‘Firmonnell’ (who is my BEST chick friend of all time) starts a Snapchat banter. We enjoy to take the piss out of each other and like I always say, we’re not lame nor basic. We’re not chicks who cry into gin, take warm bubble baths to solve life problems and braid each other’s hair to Kylie tracks.

We’re successful, sassy hotties. Lol. When we chat…WE CHAT and it is GIRL BOSS BANTER.

Executive suites for everyone!

Unfortunately for me, my guy friend grabbed my phone, and started replying to ‘Firmonnell’ ….pretending to me.

People love to do that! But I don’t know why?? Lol

She knew it wasn’t me anyway, as soon as he referred to her as ‘HUN.’ (We would NEVER EVER, relate to each other as ‘HUN.’ We’re not dickheads. Lol)

Me: ‘You should’ve gone with Yo… BITCH.’

She knew when it WAS ME however, as whenever I mentioned a guy that I swirled with, she would give me her blunt sassy answers of ‘nada, no go.’

Me:’ He said he wanted to….’

Firmonnell: ‘He said that five years ago and still hasn’t…Lol’

Then she slagged my guy friend off, to my pretending to be me’ guy friend..because she knew my guy friend, was not actually me. (If you got that, you’re some kind of genius.)

It probably made him die inside a little.

I NEARLY DIED, a little. Lol

Me: ‘I really didn’t say that about you..Lol’

Friend: ‘Well at least I know the truth.’

Yet, let’s refrain from going on my phone and trying to tackle Big Girl banter, because YOU WILL get roasted!! Lol.

It was so much fun. Firmonnell messaged me this morning literally PISSING HERSELF, because she called my guy friend..

‘POOR, AND TOO MUCH.’

Hahaha.

OH LORD!!!

What is my life! No wonder I’m always fucking single!

So many options. Not one of them ever fits. Lol

But other than messing up a phone audition this morning, I don’t have anything else to report. I’ve just had fun with  my dad and the babies, today.

I’m annoyed that I messed up my audition, because it’s something that i’d really be good at. Something that I want. But I was sat in my car, half in pyjamas, half in a pin stripped shirt, whilst listening to an echo on the phone…and I just…Well, I could’ve done better than that!

Let’s hope, I get another shot!

Chrissie x

 

 

 

All four of us.

Prosecco, Mel & Sunstroke…

Image may contain: 1 person

Happy Sunshine. Gosh! It’s Bliss! As if we have an ENTIRE WEEK of blistering warmth, to celebrate our Yorkshire Summer. I don’t know why i’m so chipper about it because ‘sunny times’ are total ‘DANGER ZONE’ for me. The booty shorts come out, the hair flick gets bigger, the ‘sunnies’ get left on any or every bar table in town (i’m awful for saving sunglasses) and worst of all, I get EXTREMELY distracted by ‘good, good times.’ I’m REALLY gonna have to focus on getting work done, as ‘YOLO’ will get the better of me.

I need to pull myself together….AGAIN

I hung out with my good friend Mel on Friday evening, in the sun, over iced prosecco. She looked amazing. She looked really happy and I love that, because it’s contagious. I like to see her happy. She’s been through a lot.

It was so great to see her, because we’ve ended up being really close friends, which is good going to say we began our rapport by ‘BLANKING’ each other and maybe hitting the ‘dislike’ button on occasion. (I didn’t dislike her. I was terrified of her. She disliked me. 🙂 However, now, she’s one of my closest. I’ve EARNED my way into her heart..and if you know Mel, that takes some ******* doing. lol) 

Any time, your chick friend arrives early, (I was already at The Carlton, having a quick drink after work, with Jodie, Scott, KatyP, Golfer Jonny, Ginger Brad, Our Gav and a ‘boys night.’) But yes, sorry..anytime your chick friend arrives early, with an ice cold bucket and cheeky bottle of ‘ready to pour’ prosecco in her hand, You KNOW it’s noting but true love.

You don’t strut up towards Wunna Land, without a drink in your hand. It’s the rules…

I love a surprise appearance and with a strut and a ‘BEAM’ and a…

‘I’ve messaged you to say I was early and bought us prosecco…’

‘Shit, I didn’t see it.. Firmonnell’s fuming that I’m here. Haha. She hopes we have a shit time…’

…we shimmied over to our own little table and caught up on life, in the Yorkshire sunshine. I was honestly so happy to see her because I’ve missed her so much and sometimes, you don’t realize how much you miss someone, until you see them again… in the sunshine. Everything’s better in the sunshine.

(The last time I saw her I walked through her front door with a bunch of yellow tulips, before people had *dance offs* to Tina Turner tracks, as I sipped berried prosecco out of gold rimmed flutes and nibbled my favourite olives.) 

‘I got you your favourite olives…You love these.’

I’ve always say that this chapter of my life has caused me to be a rubbish friend…Well, no..I’ll take responsibility and say, I kinda chose to be a rubbish friend. I prioritized things differently, this year.

However, I’ve noticed that I’m never a rubbish friend to Mel. (Probably because she won’t have any of it. I respect her for that. Haha. She’s a real life trooper and I have a lot of love for her, simply because you don’t **** with Mel…EVER. She’s kind once she let’s you in…She’s fun, once she lets you in…)

I have loads of close chick friends, yet really different relationships with them all…We’re all close, but completely different girls…But I like that…What we have in common is GREAT SOULS..and hideous drinking habits.

Firmonnell and I can always be rubbish to each other, even though she’s never rubbishy to me, because we’re soulmates. Our souls entwine as one…to the point where she makes me think I only need her and not even a man in my life…Lol. (Real Talk. Aside from my family and KatyP, she’s probably the only person I speak to every single day.) 

Image result for carrie bradshaw quotes girlfriends are soulmates

*I’ve definitely only put the above paragraph up, so she doesn’t feel as **** for me hanging out with Mel. Haha*

Plus, she says she never reads the blog, because she ‘doesn’t have to read this **** as she knows me in real life…‘ Lol. Which I like, because now I can write whatever I want about her and she’ll never know, OR EVEN BETTER have to ADMIT, that she’s read it. 🙂 

Shush! I’m joking. I love her.

So, Mel and I chattered about life, our love lives to be honest. We’ve kinda had a hard time in love, because that’s the way Cupid wanted it to pan out. I don’t know why, we find it so hard to settle down, even suitors appear through the years and wish to ‘settle?’ I always think, I haven’t because i’m happy and I haven’t yet met the right man.

But we’re single, we’re alive, we’re independent women, with our own careers and children, making the best of what we have.

Then I don’t know what happened, but she started to talk to me and as she did, I started to feel dizzy. I started to feel sick? I felt really drunk. Like it *popped* out of nowhere. I’d only had two drinks before she arrived and I’d only had a glass of prosecco. I felt really woozy, to the point where I her face zoned out…and I just couldn’t even sit up for another second. Lol

‘I need the loo…’

So I rushed off and in the loo, and in the cubicle I felt really poorly. So poorly, I was sick. (I always do this when I’m with Mel. Not the last time, but the time before, I puked in her washing up bowl. Lol) 

I got back and I felt moderately better, but still woozy.

Me: ‘I’ve been sick.’

Mel: ‘What? You always do this with me. How much did you have before I got here?’

Me: ‘Nothing. Just two drinks.’

Mel: ‘We need chip butties…’

(You can tell we’re Northern. We don’t wear tights in winter and we always think comfort food solves all life issues.) 

So chip butties came, because Mel, is literally the Hostest with the Mostest.’ She’s sassy, but she’s really good at taking care of people. She’s nurturing…and THANK GOD, cos i’m awful at looking after adults. Lol. I’m also awful if people cry in front of me, because i never know what the appropriate call of duty is….other than ‘Do you need a wine?’

I couldn’t eat my chip butty…I need to eat more. Then ‘Boys Night’ kept coming up to me, a boy at a time and asking for hugs and love.

‘Why are you all hugging me on boys night? Why are you looking at me? Do boys night, at boys table. We’re doing girls night!! Lol’

‘We just want a hug. Why you being boring..?’

So, I hugged, felt ill, then Tanya (Mel’s Friend) came and I got my second wind! It came out of nowhere and I was back on form. We did another two ice buckets of prosecco and yeah, tipsy then happened.

But we were happy tipsy.

Life filled with laughter and chick tales. (And more hugs from ‘Boys Night.’ I’m honestly like a ‘stag do/boys night’ prop. If boys are out, on a boys night, they sight me and want me to join the party. A bit like Sheffield really. I’m back in Sheffield in a couple weeks.) 

Anyway, I thought I was drunk, hence why I was sick? Makes total sense. But it turns out, (according to my little Doctor Mum) that I had sunstroke. I’m a slow drinker. But I’m a good drinker, in the sense that you’ll never see me falling about. I can do three drinks. That’s not going to make me puke ever.

So please be careful in the sun, this week. I’ve been in direct sunlight, all day long, with no water sipping, absorbing those rays and with wine in my hand always. It’s not good for you, if you’re not careful.

Then yesterday it was the football. I didn’t watch it. But I counted our goals on the cheers, that I heard. I caught up with KatyP and Claire, Golfer Jonny and his mates…Then Little Sam and His Blond Buddy Bud of Banter, with JD joined us..

Blond Buddy Bud: ‘Whenever I go to Bigfellas, random boys come up to me in the loos and tell me they can feel their Gaydar.’

Me: ‘It cos you have cherubim hair.’

Blond Buddy Bud: ‘And I have shoes at home, that i’ve named *Fellas.*

Sam: ‘You should go around the bar, in your wet tshirt, stop guys, tell them you can feel your Gaydar & see how long it takes for you to get punched. Chrissie, can we selfie for my Snapchat.’

Golfer Jonny’s friend Barney had a birthday. He doesn’t look like a gin guy, but he ginned it all day and started singing Wham songs. I like Barney because he once told a guy he looked like someone off the ‘Guess Who’ game. (Lol)

Barney: ‘Does he have a beard? No! Does he have hair? No. It’s HANK off Guess Who!!’

He also stated Golfer Jonny’s jeans were so tight, it looked like his bottom was ‘chewing a toffee’ and went to a chick’s loo, during a DATE, sat on her toliet seat and SNAPPED IT IN HALF, with his arse, due to a strong descent. Haha. 

Long story short. Lots of drama then occurred. I didn’t get to selfie. I didn’t stay out of the sun. I got home safe and woke up fine, this lovely morning.

I’ve got a lot of work to do. A book to write. I think i have birthday drinks this afternoon. I’ve got the babies after school. I have an audition. They actually have an audition to film. I’m feeling really lucky. I’m still pretty single.. I need to concentrate on work. Firmonnell’s throwing a BBQ on Sunday. I’m loving every single INCH of being Mummy. The babies are my WORLD. I’m back on your telly shortly…and I think I still have sunstroke? How do I make it better?

All my love,

Chrissie x

Image may contain: 1 person

 

 

 

 

 

 

Life, Drinks & Mexican Blow Jobs

Image may contain: Chrissie Wunna

Happy Bank Holiday! Suns Out! Funs Out! Let’s get playing! (Can you tell i’m doing shit at this ‘staying in and not drinking when it’s sunny’ thing? But who cares? I had a chilled one yesterday and let’s face it, I’m hear to live with my full face on, not twiddle thumbs in a knitted cardy.) Its important that we stick to our strengths.

If you’re in LA! (And a lot of my closest friends are! I LOVE YOU SO MUCH.) Hope you had an AMAZING ‘CINCO DE MAYO!’ Any excuse to enjoy a tipple, even if we do it in sombreros and celebrate the fact that I invented the ‘Mexican Blowjob.’ (You need to ‘back track’ blog for that information. But it’s totally flipping worth it.)

It’s basically, the art of giving someone a blow job…yet at the same time HUMMING the theme tune to the ‘Mexican Hat Dance.‘ And before you all get narky. I’m allowed to say this, because *many moons ago,* I had a Mexican Husband, and that’s when I decided to invent this treat…So THERE. I’m not a floozy. Just a great ‘at the time’ wife? Yay! Divorce!!!  Lol. (Good Save.)

If you’re weird and you don’t know the theme tune to the ‘Mexican Hat Dance‘ IS… Hit *Play* bitches now…  🙂 And yes…I did!

Okay, so i’ve been whining on about my love life for a bit now, and I do want you to know that it IS actually deliberate..and you’ll find out why shortly. However, our  Love lives, be you a girl or boy.. is such an important thing to us, isn’t it? Even if we play it down. I always find it strange when guys or even girls don’t have the time or ability to love. Maybe because i’m the opposite way. But I just couldn’t live a life with someone who was numb to emotion or FUN.

DON’T BE DULL. LIVE. BE FUN. HAVE A LAUGH. I MEAN I DON’T WHY PEOPLE TAKE THEMSELVES OR LIFE SO SERIOUSLY AT TIMES? RELAX. ENJOY IT. I’m someone who just KNOWS how to LIVE…and i’ll go to my grave happy because of it.

*Throws you a life line. Boomerangs you a chance*

Yesterday was super sunny, but I had a chill day kinda day, dedicated to family. I was in INSTA JAIL for the majority of the day and it was fine at first, until i got frustrated, sweaty and ran out of gin…then it wound me up. I’m going off gin. It doesn’t give me the gusto,t he spunk, the ‘Ooh laa’ that I need. Luckily, ‘Miss Murphy’ who I adore, (i’m starting to adore her madly,) sat with opposite me with a..

‘*Like* something and let me screenshot it.’

‘WHEN AM I OUT OF INSTA JAIL. Like i have shit to promote through the week!!’

‘ Miss. Murphy’ does PR for a living, in Leeds but our kids go to school together and what I adore about ‘The Murph’ is that I see her in snippets and when I do, I literally tell her everything, without her permission…sort of like she’s confession box. Whatever that is? 😉 My heart lights up when I see her, because I’ll either get to repent, or she’ll join in with the verbal Tom Foolery, without judgement.

Today, I want drinks and i’m certainly gonna get them. it’s me time. I’m choosing ‘The Carleton’ as my haunt…and well I’ll know everyone there, so I’ll only need to rock up with a smile and bump into EVERYONE. I’m sorted!

Life is great. It’s almost like i’m trying to pretend that.. NOT MUCH is going on, when A LOT of really serious stuff is occurring. I don’t know why i’m doing that?  Maybe i’m worried and I don’t like you to know that? Or maybe I just can’t believe my luck..and i’m absorbing it quietly? Or Maybe I just want you to think life can be easy? I dunno? Yet, it seems to be working. Haha.  So ‘whatevers.’ You’ll hear about it soon, so don’t worry. I’m really excited and like I always say, I’m the luckiest girl in the world.

THINGS ARE CHANGING. NEW PEOPLE ARE SHIMMINING IN..New opportunities are occurring…

(Hahaha. I can’t at all concentrate because ‘The Mexican Hat Dance’ song keeps playing on my laptop and I can’t turn it off. How do I make it stop? It’s putting me off!! Lol Plus, that Husband once through me across a restaurant by accident in LA..so he didn’t even deserve my treat. Don’t get all stressed. He picked me up when drunk and attempted a baby fling…but I FLEW ACROSS TABLES, because I’m light like that? 😉 I was in a tshirt that read ‘I break hearts on a daily basis’ I was 20 something, crying lol and then some other dude called ‘Mickey,’ who has now passed away, tried to comfort me in a strip club. Hahaha.) 

I’m really missing my girl bestie ‘Firmonnell’ right now. You need a good chick team, don’t you and she’s certainly one of THE BEST girls I know. In a world where you live your life publicly online, there’s actually always secrets and well… she certainly knows all mine. She’s the only person I tell EVERYTHING TO, honestly, without censor.

Me: ‘I don’t even know why he didn’t  evenlove me?’

Firmonnell: ‘It’s been done for a long time. It was good FOR the TIME…THAT time…but just move forward. He’s so dull.’

I kinda felt free…

The reason why I love a bit of ‘Firmonnell’ (who needs a better blog name) is because when I don’t tell her the truth, she sees right through me…Yet, she doesn’t make me feel bad for it. Lol.  I messaged her the other day, because I was feeling ‘needy af.’ I just needed advice…this is what she said…

Firmonnell: ‘Find someone who takes your breath away, who can look after you, who makes you laugh, who makes you shine and doesn’t hold you back.’

And from different sides of the city….that’s all I needed to hear. Two chicks, from two different walks of life, threw each other a life line, because they saw the world through the same eyes…

I’d love someone to take my breath away, yet I want them to be bantery and fun, at the same time. I love a ‘handsome’ cheeky chappy. One that can make fun of you, but love you madly. Lol. But to be honestly, i’m pretty happy, because I don’t have to really look…they’ll step forward. It’s what men do.

Anyway, i’m off for breakfast with my daughter, before I drop her off at her daddies…and tinkle down to a beer garden for Bank Holiday. I’m like it’s 9.17am? Is the pub open yet? Hahah.

But enjoy it. Do, DO LIVE!!

It’s Summer right! If you follow this blog religiously, you’ll know that I usually regard Summer time, as a season where people just ‘fling.’ They never seem to fall in love…they ‘crush’ and ‘fling’…as Winter is when the ‘coupling up’ happens., people are more lonely during that time and Christmas kinda fills hearts with merriment and all that jazz. Lol

This Summer is different, because this Summer i’ve grown into a woman. So as you’re drinking out of coconuts (because honestly how many more people can I see on my newsfeed, drinking out of coconuts this year. Last year it was the ‘flamingo/unicorn inflatable..’ Lol) I’m gonna find me some REAL FUN, that fun that LASTS a lifetime…

Chrissie x

Thank you for following my life…

Image may contain: Chrissie Wunna

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Girls Are Mental & I’m Feeling Frisky

If I wake up with a cat on my head again, i’m going to be fuming. I’m a glamour puss. I need to wake up calmly….not with something eating… *wink, wink, nudge, pout*……..my head. 😉 Any other form of ‘eating,‘  of course.. with my consent….is fine.

And do know, that i’m not being intentionally meaning to be smutty….I firstly, really do have a pet kitten named ‘Rocco’ who ate my head this morning…and secondly…right now, I feel like i’m on heat! Haha. I’m a proper ‘old aged’ horn ball.

I don’t know what’s wrong? (What’s right!!! 🙂 ) What’s wrong, with me? Maybe i’m wearing too many faux furs, or eating too much protein? Who knows? But my libido button, has certainly been switched to….’WORKING.’ (And i’m naturally excited by sensuality anyway…so you can IMAGINE how i’m feeling right now.)

*Takes the faux fur off. Puts down the chicken drummer.*

HOSE ME DOWN.

Oh and here’s a quick memo for ya….The above paragraph doesn’t mean you all have toslide into my DM’s’ immediately…At least give it an hour. Lol. I might have calmed down by then….

I’m joking. I really am. I might not be a Virgin Princess, yet just because i’m heated doesn’t mean i’m gonna come running, across fields, with my ‘frillies‘ down by my ankles. (Across fields?? Who do I think I am? It sounds so ‘Sound of Music’…if it was a porn?)Even though everything in Wunna land is done with a wild panache. Do know, that I’m the utter Queen of Self Control. I’m good stock, me 🙂

Mwahahaha!

So, it’s maybe five o clock in the morning, I’m in some satin dressing gown, getting my face done, getting ready to shoot and I look down at my phone and I see 44 Whatsapp notifications. 

When I see this, i know it’s from a group chat, something dramatic and 100 percent from the girls. Boys aren’t like that. (Apart from that one time in LA, a million years ago when Corey called me 22 times in a row for kicks. He even sang on one of the voicemails….Voicemail 22 was simply…’This is call 22, Wunna. Let me in.) I actually kinda liked it. I found it funny. He owns a huge Real Estate company in LA now…So I won’t gobble on about it anymore… in case it gets him into corporate trouble. As that would be shit.

Anyway, so I figured the ‘drama’ couldn’t be too dramatic because I only saw two of them for a wine lunch on Friday?

I was wrong.

My chick friend ‘Hustle Barbie’ left her boyfriend, packed a suitcase and is now officially single. (She’s headed to stay at her other chick bestie’s home and has packed a suitcase, containing ALL her life necessities…. which only consists of bikinis and Himalayan Salt Lol… )

I love her for that. I mean, even though it’s probably a really difficult time. The wonderful thing about it all, is that she took a chance and committed to a ‘new chapter.’ She wasn’t scared to find her own piece of happiness…She wasn’t scared to live… and I respect that.

Always go with your gut instinct, Always stay loyal to what makes you happy.

I mean I go on about life all the time and how important it is to fully LIVE IT, enjoy it and take those chances…and people sometimes put fear in your soul, to stop you from finding your own piece of ‘happy.’ They’re own insecurity makes them do that to you.

Don’t be part of a couple that doesn’t fit. If it doesn’t make you smile. If you can’t feel the *spark*… It’s just not worth it…for either party.

Always go with your gut instinct. Always stay loyal to what makes you happy.

To be honest, I don’t actually know what’s going on with the girls right now? I love them madly. But I don’t get to see them so much anymore, because I’ve been SO busy with work. Entertainments got a good *grip* of me right now…and i’m working really hard, things are going great…

Mel: ‘Chrissie? If she’s still alive…Where are you?’

We did have lunch on Friday. (They all seem to be breaking up with their boyfriends for Summer Lol. They’ve labelled it ‘Divorce Club.’)

Here’s snippets:

Me: ‘Honestly, you need to stop. You’re making yourself look crazy. Don’t send him a crazy message, get no reply and then justify the crazy message with an *i’m not crazy, honest* message. Hahaha. JUST STOP TEXTING!!! STOP! TEXTING…NOW!’

‘She’s right, just vent on me instead. Tell ME instead.’

Me: ‘Yeah. I vent on her all the time…It works, then you never send that crazy message! You’ve relieved yourself of the stress.’

‘Remember when you went mental over that golfer!’

‘Was she even hot?’

‘It wasn’t about hottness.. Lol.’

‘And if you’re going to send a crazy message…commit to it. Don’t justify it.’

Me: ‘STOP TEXTING.’

‘I just don’t want him to think i’m creepy. I’m not creepy.’

‘But don’t text him *i’m not creepy* Haha.’

‘Well, yeah, because it obviously makes me sound creepy. But I’ve done it now though.’

Bottom line, girls can’t help it. Whether they’re stalking your ex, pining for your attention…creating fake Facebook profiles…Whatever it is….It can’t be helped. It’s hormones…I think?

I mean, we can’t find a hair bobble, when it’s around our flipping wrist…but we know what you did in 2011, with your Dad in Paris. Lol.

And before you all start…I’m not part of the ‘social stalk club. And the reason why I’m not is firstly because people do it to me ALL OF THE TIME…and CREATE ALL OF THE WRONG JUDGMENTS, before they even know me.

I guy once sat next to me in a bar, a few months ago… when I was with my friends…(he was trying to make me go for a drink with him,) but Googled me, whilst I was STILL SAT THERE and went through my whole entire bits of ‘news,’ out loud, with me…in the weirdest sort of fashion? Didn’t try to get to know me at all? Just read out my life to me…in a CV like fashion.

Now, I don’t mind people looking people up. I do it, ALL the time. We ALL do it, when we meet someone new. There’s nothing wrong with that. It’s handy, innit. 😉

BUT I’m polite, so I do it behind your back, 🙂 which makes it okay.

Hahaha. Plus, I was sat right there. He didn’t think to just talk to me, or chat to me, or ask me questions? I liked the attention, but didn’t like the guy. Bad form. Make convo. I mean, men are men, they should know how to win over a girl. It’s human nature.

The second reason why I don’t ‘social stalk’ is because I like to live with my ‘rosie tinted’ specs on, thinking all is okay, fine and dandy. I play the ‘ignorance is bliss‘ game. I don’t look for trouble. Meaning, I won’t ever find it. I’m therefore *blind* to it. Blind and happy, as can be. I don’t wanna know. I also don’t like the sound of a breaking heart. I like an easy life. No stress. Just ‘good times.’

But yeah, chicks are mental. It’s not like you didn’t know that anyway.

I did have a laugh with the girls though, even if they asked me where I sloped off to sometime last month, when we all went to Nat’s birthday…

Me: ‘ Oh, I felt tired…so I said I was looking for you, but just walked out the door and left. Hahaha.’

Hahaha. I ALWAYS DO THAT! Yet, I always tell ONE person…then just slope off quietly. I just needed a sleep. I’d been at fittings all day.

However, I’m glad I did leave now, because they all woke up at my chick friend ‘Double B’s’ house.

One.. found joggers…

‘Who’s random joggers are these?’

One… in the dirtiest crop top ever..

‘What the fuck have you got on? Why does it look like you’ve picked it out of a bin. It has rips and disgusting stains on it.’

‘Double B’ (the hostest with the mostest) apparently woke all the girls up, at the crack of dawn, with her FULL FACE on and in a KIMONO.

Hahahahaha. I’M DYING. I LOVE IT. I WAS SO PROUD. THAT IS SO ME.

Then she had to move her car, so she put joggers on, UNDER HER Kimono and moved her green gangsta Mercedes, so people could do the ‘walk of shame.’

That’s friendship.

I’m glad i went home early and missed it all. Lol.

Cya,

Thank you for following my life. x

 

 

 

Spring Cleans, Hollywood & Really Dodgy Fetish Parties ;)

I’m feeling all boated and knackered today, but i’ve got in the bag. My ‘Va Vooms’ on fire and because I feel like the busiest bee in all of the beautiful land…(Bee’s never look that busy to me, they just look like they try and SOUND busy, yet really they just fly around stinging people, whilst being stripey…) However, yes…I am busy with ‘the niggly bits’ the bits I despise. The bits where it comes in really handy, if OTHER PEOPLE do them for you. 🙂

*PLEASE HELP! HELP AWAY!*

And because I hate all things ‘niggly’ and it’s not wine o clock yet….I stayed really focused and distracted myself 🙂 by not concentrating, Googling bikinis and instead cleaned three rooms of my home from top to bottom, listening to ‘Little Mix’ in pyjama bottoms and a bra, and making work calls.

If I ever decide to clean my home that intensely from top to bottom…You know that I must be trying to bury my head in the glittery sand. I once threw out a pan and bought a new one simply because I couldn’t be arsed to clean it. 🙂

It’s like the most boring distraction in the world ever. It’s lame. Don’t do it. Sleeping with Greek men in togas is a good distratcion…Seeing what Michelle Keegan looks like in a bikini is a distraction…Cocktails…Friends, Banter….ANYTHING.

However, Scrubbing and hoovering is NOT! It’s shit. I only did it to burn extra ‘cos i’m bloated’ calories. But now i feel like I need 20 wines…

I have a really busy next 2 weeks…maybe 3 weeks…It’s jammed and at the same time i’m armed with The Wunna Babies. (Ruby squeezed all my Johnsons Baby Lotion of the pink bottle and and filled it up with water. That was fun. That was great! What a beautiful child. Didn’t at all make me want to RIP MY **&&*&*$$£”””” hair out. 🙂

Like the time when my LA guy roommate kept trying my clothes on in secret, when I was younger. I’d lay them all out, ready for a night on the razzle. I’d come back, after skipping off to buy wine, to find them inside out, worn…and smelling of sweaty boy. Lol. But much better than the time, I walked back in after late night Hollywood drinks…and found 7 grown up males, in pretend NAPPIES/DIAPERS, drinking beer and dancing in the living room….

I walked in with my best friend, who’s now a really successful film producer..(Good switch from ‘Party Boy’) and all I could hear was them panicking and shouting…

‘FUCK!!! DUDE!!!!! SHE’S FUCKING BACK ALREADY! DON’T LET HER GO UPSTAIRS.’

But me being Me…It weirdly didn’t bother me. Lol. I found it really funny..Plus, nothing is WORSE than having a secret fetish party and having a human, (who’s not part of the fun) *surprise* walk in…Let alone ‘surprise walk in’ and ALSO make you feel SHITTY… (Yet they were in diapers? Lol. I’m ridiculously laid back , when it comes to ‘taboo’ behaviour. I’ve seen so much…that that wasn’t anything really.

Me: ‘My feet hurt, are there anymore drinks…Why are you pretending to be an octopus? I’m going upstairs…’

Random Nappy Dude: ‘That’s Chrissie W’…’

Roomie: ‘Wunna…Yeah. She’s my roommate.’

Random Nappy Dude: ‘AW! FUCKSAKE DUDE!!!’

Roomie: ‘Don’t let her go upstairs! Oh! Hi, Matt!”

(That was my bestie.)

‘Chrissie, you’ve got some mail and that dude you went on a date with…that weird Bodyguard one…dropped your stuff back… Like a belt?’

Me: ‘Does it say *DIRT* on it? Is it that diamante one? He hasn’t even fixed the *Y* on it, has it…What an idiot. I hate dates… I’m just not gonna speak to him..’

And this was all when i was in my mid 20’s, and whilst my roommate was in a pretend diaper…and he was a lawyer. 🙂

HAHAHA. (Sorry, I’m just pissing myself….. My friend Matt & I did so much better for ourselves…Lol)

Upstairs was awful. Lol. Even I was shocked. I’ve told the story before and it IS embedded in this website…

But yeah…Lol…What I was actually going to say, is that now i’ve told the story…I noticed that the whole random fetish party didn’t bother me at all, yet the guy who decided to try on my clothes, whilst I was out, behind my back, BEFORE I HAD EVEN WORN THEM……

PISSED ME OFF.

So, it must be the little things that wind me up.

But anyway, thank you everyone for reading my blog! I’ve received so many inbox messages from literally all over the world, from ladies, men, girls, guys and saying that they’re loving it, hooked or have just had a first time ‘peek.’

Like ‘Trigg’ had a first time peek yesterday, because he couldn’t follow quite obvious instructions. Lol.

Trigg: ‘I didn’t know I could swipe up?’

Me: ‘What? Even though it says SWIPE UP??’

And a guy from Vienna messaged me this morning saying that he read yesterdays blog and loved it and that HE actually used to work right by me in LA, by The Grove. He has this wonderful Youtube channel about his travels, so I’m gonna check that out today.

Plus, I love that all Ladies, love a ‘school mums’ blog. Unfortunately, I went with diaper ridden fetish party today…But hey…It’s all about balance, right? 😉

I had a moment yesterday, where I stopped a second after being rushed out of a meeting and into a car, where I *paused* and got to chill for a moment….

I sent this message…

‘Missing ya.’

They replied with a..

‘Miss u to xx’

Then life scuttled us along…..

I’ve got lots going on, shoots, influencey things, I’ve got to fit in the time to commit to filming, flights to Spain, meetings, Motherhood…and my friends….

In this Chapter, my newest one…I am being a really shit friend. I went from having all the time in the world, to having no time…Or having to prioritse my time. Plus, I have ‘powers above’ who make me hinder to sacrifices. But I just have to do it. It’s work and i’m building…

But this weekend, it’s my chick friend ‘Fairytales’ birthday drinks…So I’ll be celebrating it with her at The Electric Theatre….

I actually almost forgot, because I had fittings and flights and all sorts of busy mayhem…But Mel reminded me on Monday….I love ‘People Reminders.’ And just like that…I’ll be there!

The Career’s going really well. I’m feeling really confident right now…

I’m gonna SMASH IT.

Cue: FIRE

When guys are like…………

Image may contain: 1 person, close-up

I’m in such a GOOD MOOD today!!! I’m like a juicy little bubble berried  with excitement. You could just *squeeze* me and I’d *POP* confetti, with *squeaks* of laughter and shrieks and ‘ooh laa.‘ Then champagne showers would simply start roaring out of nowhere, as let’s face it it’s Wunna Land. Glasses would be poured.  ‘Handsomes‘ would be winking…. and I would just strut forward, knowing that my version of life just seems to be getting better!

To be fair, after that really shit 2013…or was it 2014? I’ve blanked out deliberately. Lol. One of those years was SHOCKING. After that point…MY LIFE, just changed and I became the luckiest chick ever.

Then at the beginning of 2017 my mentality changed…new people entered Wunna Land. I became closer to people who I never knew I would be so close to….Then my life changed again…and Right now,because I whopped out that sassy Wunna ‘Gusto’ and decided to just  do the things that made me happy, without fear…2018 has ended up (so far) being one of the best years of my life….

YIPPPPPPPPeeeeeeeeEEEEEEEE!

I’m in the most wonderful mood, for no real reason and it’s fantastic because I feel ALIVE! I’m ‘happy go lucky’ by nature. I’m the frill in ya twisters. The *pop* of that champers spray. I’m giddy…I’m great. I’m like a little girl, that’s filled with charm….I’m celebrating life and no one can stop me. And the most wonderous thing about my Tuesday, is the simple the fact that today…I have NO PRESSURE! I’m freeeeeeeeeeee!

So, I’m feeling like a Winner! ( Chicken! Chicken! Dinner!)

To me ‘balance’ is one of the most important things that I measure when it comes to success. (I nearly typed ‘ ‘when it comes to sex‘ then. Lol. How ‘Cougar‘ of me. I can’t wait until my ‘Cougar’ days kick in. I CAN REALLY. I’D HATE IT. After financially and emotionally looking after every single man in the entire world, that Cupid has FORCED me to date…or Life has MADE me cross paths with….A little lost boy, with no job, is not gonna make my wish list. Ever. And I don’t even care. Lol. I can like what or who I want….

At this point in my life, I very much want to be taken care of emotionally, mentally, physically and by a grown up man that I don’t have to pay for. That’s always good, isn’t it! And i’ve noticed that the more successful I’ve become, the more ‘lost little boys, with no job‘ come a knocking.

‘Meal tickets are the other way…Nope…No…Wait…Turn around…A bit to the left…Oh yeah and keep on walking darling…Don’t look back now, you cheeky little thing. Wunna land’s door is FUCKING SLAMMED….beautifully shut. 😉  Oh the kids are swearing at you, from the rosy tinted windows.’

What has happened to men?

I mean, the ‘Little Lost Boy’ aside….It doesn’t take much to value your girl, guy, wife, partner or fancy piece and treat her with both respect…AND like a Princess! 😉

ITS NOT THAT HARD!

I mean my guy friend, the other day was moaning about how  we chicks are all ‘trying to be independent’ now….(He took a chick out on a date, made her pay for THEIR meal and then ‘boned’ her in the back of a car.)

Romance is alive….Shakespeare couldn’t have written it better himself.

We girls have always been independent. Not only have some of us wanted to be. But we’ve also HAD to be.

I’m adventurous and fun by nature. I moved to LA by myself as a kid to chase dreams. That’s my ‘WANTING to be’ independent streak. But my ‘HAVING to be‘ independent streak is still utterly alive, because i’m a lone parent of two little babies…I’m Mum, I’m Dad, I’m Love, I’m Money. I’m everything!

At first that wasn’t by choice. Yet now….It’s great and it’s made me feel powerful… and if I love anything, I love feeling powerful. Lol.

It’s a turn on. (Sick I know.) But I go for that in guys also? I have no clue why, other than sickness? However, yes, I’m totally turned on by it….BUT ONLY IF THEY HAVE A BEAUTIFUL SOUL AND RESEMBLE A DELICIOUS PIECE OF EYE CANDY. 🙂 (Meaning not some big grizzle, ancient years older than me, evil pervert, with 22 beer bellies and a boner.)

I like a well rounded, fun, loyal, loving man. The ‘power’ things is only a sexual turn on. I don’t want you to get it twisted. Lol. It’s not an essential trait that they need. Lol. In the bedroom…I’d find that REALLY SEXY. But like I said, they have to be of the ‘handsome’ variety…You can call me ‘shallow’ for that….and…well..I won’t care. Lol. It’s what I fancy.

Everyone loves eye candy. Some people just like to look at eye candy. I like to find eye candy, with an amazing personality, that would make a good hubbster …and just make him MINE. 🙂

Italiano: (My LA Friend..) ‘She pretty much grew up in Hollywood around a bunch of guys. We were all roomates. Models, actors, lawyers, agents… But it was definitely ALL guys and Chrissie…So she kinda picked up a Hollywood dudes mentality when it comes to dating… And it’s fucking awesome. She was the best roomie I ever had!’

(We all just had so much fun. I cannot even begin to TELL you the stories. But they’re scattered throughout my blog… through the years….I loved that at 20, we could just show up to an audition, do really bad at it and then simply say ‘Fuck it’ go to The Standard, order 4 poolside strawberry margaritas and make ourselves feel better, before our next audition.)

I’ve gone on a flipping tangent!

What was I even on about? Balance? Or things I like i guys? I forgot about it all, because I was too busy *bobbing* away with cocktails at ‘The Standard.’

When it comes to men…their spirit needs to play well with mine. I want them to be my best friend. They have to be a family man. I have kids. They are part of my package. I love a laugh. I love a thoughtful person. I love sexy. I LOVE SEXY. Smart. Vain. I love ‘good times.’ But I love to chill and even if I fancy treating myself to utter glamour pussy, dressed ‘to the nines’ luxury, (which I adore,) I also love to just slum it and banter in my comfies…with a takeout.

When it comes to ‘balance’ true success to me, is when someone has everything…Happiness, health, wealth, a career they love, their dream partner, maybe even a family…and it’s all easy and all beautiful.

When I see a man who has that…I see him as ‘Successful.’

(I mean, what’s the point at winning at ONE thing, if during that time, you managed to lose everything else….?)

I learnt that early on in life in LA, when I was about 23. It was a very hard ‘learn.’ Hahaha. I cried a lot for a while…then cried over useless wilies….;)

Throwback convo….Do it in your best American accent….

Christine: ‘What the fuck is up with her…?’

Theo: ‘It’s fine, leave it. She’s crying over a penis…’

I can’t be bothered to write anymore…I need an afternoon tipple…Or an adventure with friends! I met my good friend ‘House of Solo’ Magazines, ‘Big A’ yesterday. He’s on a diet and with an orange juice, showed me all the people he was booking for the front cover of his magazine. This was at Ego…(which is like my local bar.)

BUT…

I’m excited, because I’m actually at Ego this evening for dinner and drinks, with all the Mum’s of Ruby’s class/year…whatever you want to call it. It’s great because we’ve never really hung out with each other before. We only ever see one another in passing…So, it will be really lovely, to just sit down, eat, drink and be merry, and get to know some faces that I pretty much see everyday!

That’s tonight!

Kisses,

Chrissie. x

 

Flashbacks, Fifty Shades & My Flipping Love Life

Image may contain: 1 person, standing

I keep doing this thing where I wake up at around 3am in the morning, because I can’t sleep? I sleep naked and so I’ll moan that i’m chilly, step out of bed, not remember to grab a tshirt and instead unplug my phone (priorities)  and just get back into bed. Then i’ll start to Google everything. Literally anything. Lol. Before I get back into bed, I’ll look in the mirror to see if I look okay, whilst it’s still dark, yet turning into morning??? Why do I do that!!?! No one’s there but ME!!!???!! I’ll Google search until I’m tired. Am I a lunatic? That seems a pretty safe option. 😉

I did watch ‘Fifty Shades Darker’ before I went to bed….which probably didn’t help, as I have to psycho analyse everything that torments me…:) I dreamt about it all night and then found myself Googling ‘Sadists’ incase I knew any? Lol. Everyone I know is now a sadist or a psychopath. That’s what I came up with 🙂 and then I  just fell asleep, until my kitten woke me at six clock, via the fine art of paw tapping, to make sure I was up to do get Ruby ready for school.

All the way to the school run, life moments kept flashbacking at me, during my drive. My mind went back almost 10 years and for a second, it shot to a time, where I was dating Boyband Jonny, it was late afternoon, we were having a difficult time in our relationships, yet I didn’t know why? He was expressive because he was a creative. Yet, closed off emotionally, because…I’m gonna go with….he was an Aquarian? Lol. (Aquarian’s always find me.)

Anyway, (and this was almost a decade ago) i stepped into a black cab in the middle of Camden, where he was living, which would take me back to Kings Cross, so I could shimmie back onto Northern Soil…and before my cab left, he came running down the street, in his skinny jeans, up to the window and passed me a note. I smiled, waved and the car drove away.

During my journey, I opened the folded hand written note and it read…

‘Dear Chrissie,

I know I never show it…and i’m sorry for that. But I want you to know that whenever i’m with you, my heart lights up.’

(It’s strange that he could never tell me, and had to write it. But I appreciated that anyway, because any expression is good expression, right?)

Then my *flashback* stopped… I was still en route to Ruby’s school drop off. (Boyband Jonny is actually gay now and exceedingly happy and settled. He may not have become the Boyband Superstar that he always wanted…But he openly found his happy place, which not only is MORE important…Yet also makes me beam.) 

But anyway, I was driving away, ‘Happy as Larry,’ chatting to Ruby in the car…I get to the big Ackworth roundabout and my mind begins to race again and this time it takes me to this time last year….

‘The Swirl.’ 

It took me to a moment where we were both laid in a bed…his bed, everything was peaceful and it was probably around 11pmish. We’d just watched ‘Britains Got Talent’ and then a round of ‘Celeb Juice,’ before showers in separate bathrooms and night time. I remember him looking at me, saying ‘Things with you are just easy… and after I agreed, we fell asleep that night holding hands.

Then my mind *WHIZZED* me back, almost like it didn’t want me to settle upon that thought. It took me to earlier that day, where ‘The Swirl’ and I were sat on a pale lemon sofa…(which he kept assuring me he didn’t pick..)

‘It was already here when I moved in…’

It made me notice how particular & creative he actually was. (He’s an Aquarian also! They find me.) I noticed a lot of things about him that afternoon…and I loved that, because I adore nothing more than learning about people….simply by observing them… merrily. I’m like a sponge. I’ll take in EVERYTHING.

But anyway, my mind took me to us being sat on this sofa together. We were chilling and watching tv. I made fun of something. He made fun of it also and almost innocently we both burst into this silly banter of laughter. I remember looking at him when he laughed, which made me smile.  I also remember him looking at me when I was laughing, yet when I turned to face him, (as I could feel his eyes on me,) he turned his head away quickly.

Then my *Flashbacks* stopped.

Just like that i was at Ruby’s school…and my normal day had begun.

What is going on with my mind, right now? Both happy moments. Both loving memories.

Yet, I have noticed in love, that I am always in the same place.

I achieve everything work wise. I’m a great mum…I’ve developed with Ruby & Junior threefold. I adore being Mum.It’s not always easy, but I can do it on m own and it has been my greatest gift…my life saver. I dance to New Chapters always because i’m not scared of them. I’m not scared of anything. I’m irrepressible. (My Geography teacher used to always say that about me at school. Lol.)

I’m a life warrior and probably one of the most emotionally together chicks I know! It’s almost like nothing can sort of break me down, because i’ve grown so much, after failing at shit, winning at shit, being broken, yet getting back up each time, with a SMILE ON MY FACE. I feel unbreakable. It’s powerful. It radiates from me…and in a way, i wish every woman felt like that. ( My close chick friends are actually all like that…Well, most of them anyway. 😉 )

During my time in Hollywood, I went through SO much. I had the best time definitely, but. I was in my 20’s growing up in LA. There were both good and bad moments, that I never have EVER told anyone anything about…because i’ve never wanted to. But i’ve experienced life and walked lots of different paths. At 20 it was hard. At 37, it’s now such a blessing.

That’s why I always say it is MUCH MUCH BETTER for someone to come into success, fortune, or fame as a 30 something or older, than it is as a young one….As like with love, you can handle it with a better perspective without getting carried away with the bullshit. (I never get carried away with the bullshit…even if it looks like I am, or have. 😉 )

However, when it comes to my love life…Like I said earlier…I am always in the same place…

..and it’s been that way since I was 19.

I don’t get it?

I KNOW what I want and I don’t always get it. (And i’ll never just settle.) I know what I do NOT want and that is anything that is emotionally challenging…Things should come easily….At 37, I don’t want to be dealing with issues….I just want to gallop around to the sound of happiness and true love.

I believe in boys chasing girls…The ‘old school’ tactics. It shows that they’re confident and it’s not dipped in arrogance. It shows that they’re not scared of love. It’s easy and uncomplicated.

I believe in honest expression..without that you don’t have anything. You might as well be a cardboard cut out. (I once watched one of my guy friends, make potential girlfriends *jump through hoops* to win his affection. He expected them to guess how he was feeling? I never understood why? It taught me a lot about him. He had his own issues. I accepted him for who he was, as he was one of my guy besties and I didn’t ever have to date him. Lol. Yet I always hoped those chicks quit ‘jumping.‘ He wasn’t THAT MUCH of a prize. 🙂

Image may contain: 1 person

I believe in love. I always believe in love. And I hope you do tooo!

So let’s hope that a decade from now….when i’m flipping 47. I won’t be telling you that i’m still in the same place…

But if I am…I’m sure i’ll still be happy…. 😉

Chrissie x

Image may contain: 1 person, smiling, standing

 

 

 

Let’s Not Judge & Bubblegum Bed Spreads

Image may contain: 1 person, text

I’ve slept on Bubblegums, so bare with me….Not sure what’s exactly happened, but my kids managed to place small round multi coloured bubble gum balls, under my flat sheet….? It was like ‘The Princess  The Pea’ but much much shitter and not very royal. Swearing happened. I mean before I had to film yesterday afternoon, I took the children to go watch ‘Peter Rabbit’ at the cinema yesterday morning….(I like to be away from the crowd) and Ruby complained because he VIP Box Seat wasn’t a bed???? What am I raising? Junior’s cool. Ruby is SO high maintenance that even i’m cringing.

It’s weird how we label people right? And even though we always state that we are hardly ever judgmental, by any means….We still judge…don’t we? And we shouldn’t. But it’s just life….innit.

If you know me personally, you’ll know that I’m probably one of the most easy going chicks around. I’m easy breezy, laid back and yeah I’ll strop when I’m hormonally imbalanced, or feel something with a ‘fire’ in my soul…I can be a ‘Diva.’ Yet, 90 percent of the time…I’m cool. I’m swag. Like you’ve got to be a proper TWAT for me to dislike you.

Image may contain: 1 person, sunglasses and text Image may contain: one or more people and text

Recently, I’ve been really busy with work and i’m really happy about that because it’s all I’ve ever wanted. I feel really lucky and i’m counting every single ONE of my sassy little blessings. I’ve worked really hard and it feels good to look back and kinda notice achievement. It sends a buzz through me. Almost like a love buzz. I am in a VERY NEW CHAPTER. It did start earlier, towards the end of last year, with work…HOWEVER, it takes time for change to sink in…and now I can feel this CHAPTER and it is BRIMMING with excitement.

However, on Monday….was it Monday? No….Wednesday. NO wait. It was flipping THURSDAY. Lol. On Thursday, I’d stopped off for a quick ‘boozy’ treat at one of my locals. Kate and Claire had rocked up with wine in their hands, so naturally, they parked themselves at a table that had a ‘Wunna’ parked upon it and we had THE BEST BANTER OF A NATTER EVER. It was wonderful and I really felt ALIVE.

Wine was poured, laughter was out loud and we just talked shit for HOURS. We talked guys, sex, girls, diets and life….We had this discussion on how important it was for women to still feel feminine as they got older. How we should always still have ‘girl’ fun and be treated well by gents and even though we can be feisty, most of the time we’re submissive…as men are the more selfish sex. The best girls are independant and work their own sense of self. Like i’ll still be doing my face at 80 and thinking i’m ‘da bomb.’ 😉

It was such a great afternoon, that we didn’t ever want it to stop. If we didn’t have responsibilities…(The shit thing about being 30 something) it would’ve gone on FOREVER. I would’ve turned 90 and died of laughter at that table, dripped in vino.

But Claire and I have actually known each other for years…in passing. Everyday she walked passed me. Everyday I walked passed. Everyday we said nothing to each other.

Kate: ‘Yeah, she was really shocked when she hung out with you the other day..as she had such a laugh, and didn’t think you were like that…She said she used to see you all the time, but thought you’d never speak to her…’

Claire: ‘WHAT I SAID was, that I used to look at Chrissie, tottering up all glam in her heels and hair and looking all sexy and just thought, she’ll just look at me and think….’

Me: ‘I used to look at you and think that I better not say anything because she’ll just think i’m some kind of bimbo.’

(Claire’s all tattooed, edgy and cool looking….I just thought she wouldn’t be arsed with someone like me…) 

She was saying that just because she has tattoos people often think she’s EVIL, or worships the Devil…And I was saying that everyone already seems to have an opinion of me…Yet from an Oriental girl point of view, if I just randomly find myself stood next to a guy, or an old man at a bar….People will automatically think we’re dating, that i’m a ‘Thai Bride’ or I need a visa. Lol.

Kate: ‘She’s from Doncaster.’

Anyway, The funniest thing was, that on THURSDAY we found out that we were really similar and that we actually got along really really well. So, I’m utterly happy that I sat down on Thursday afternoon, for my ‘boozy treat’ and the rocked up with their bottle of vino.

I’m social by nature. I’m chatty. I’m easy to get along with. But we’re sometimes scared to say ‘Hi’ to new people, right? Or too scared to learn about the new people, that have entered our newest chapter….

We shouldn’t always be…(and I am often cautious because within seconds…and  if i’m too friendly… a semi circle of utter testosterone floods my path of glamour and before you know it they’re talking at me, with ‘wild’ in their eyes and a boners that suggest a distinct lack of control. Lol) 

So, the message of the day is to refrain from labeling others….then making a judgement based upon that label. We chose our own versions of life, our own jobs, paths, our own looks and our own way to success, love and family….

That what makes us humans ACE.

ps/ I’m flipping over this snow. I keep watching everyone’s Instagram Stories and is everyone in the world just in Dubai right now? Or are holiday’s there on the cheap? It’s pool party this, swimwear brunch that…

PLEASE LORD GIVE ME SUN.

Pork Chops, Guinness, Herbalife & The Art of DOING YOU

Image may contain: 1 person, smiling

Kate: ‘But having a pint of Guinness is the equivalent to having a pork chop. There’s a pork chop in every pint!’

Me: ‘Why have I even sat here?’

Claire: ‘Haha..I know, she…’

Me: ‘Why is she ruining lives? She’s not even listening to me. She’s texting.’

Kate: ‘I’m Googling it.

Me: You’re ruining lives…’

Kate: ‘So, 4 cans of Guinness, is like having 4 pork chops. A pork chop in each pint… I don’t even know why you’re bothered, when have YOU EVER had a pint of Guinness????’

Me; ‘I’ve had a Guinness before. As if I haven’t. I had a baby one once too, and…’

Kate: ‘Ooh, there’s a song. Do you want to learn the Guinness/Pork Chop song?’

Claire: ‘She’s probably gonna leave now. I need a gin. I love a gin. It’s the only drink I can drink an entire litre of and feel fine on. Yeah, my head’ll hurt a bit, but I can just get on with it.’

(I love a Northern girl. We just get on with it… Well…apart from me, because i’m DRAMATIC.)

I’m a glamour puss, so i’m sure that means I get away with it? PLUS, because i’m a ‘glamour puss,’ I don’t want to hear what the meat equivalent to every single drink is…I want to hear about boys and diamonds. Pork chop song! Lol. I don’t learn songs like that. I listen to swag dudes, who ‘came in a black Benz and left in a white one.’

Sassy K: ‘Hi…I’m just reminding you that your children are due for pick up in half an hour.’

Thank the Lord for ‘Sassy K.’ I love a reminder. I need ‘people reminders‘ around me always. She’s becoming my favourite human.

How you all feeling? It’s sunny in Yorkshire today! Is it where you are? It feels like Spring. Always makes me feel better. I need sun. I need a holiday. I want one…now. Get me bobbing around a pool in an inflatable with a fruit cocktail immediately. I want to ‘CTRL ALT DEL‘ stress and just pool bob.

I’m still doing my Herbalife shakes and i’ve actually lost weight. I think i’m a week in and i’ve lost around 4 lbs, I’d say…and my jeans are looser. It’s not difficult, it’s just somewhat difficult for me, due to my lifestyle and my career, lets say. I have a job where in which I’m always invited or requested to cocktail and dine all over the place…for the blog..and it’s not like I can rock up with my shaker and start scooping strawberry powder. It’s bad manners.

But regardless. I’ve managed to do it, the best way I can, in order for it to fit into Wunna Land and my schedule and yeah…First week…i’ve done alright.

Do I get a prize yet? 30 days feels like ages…

At the weekend, i’m filming the advert for CHRISSIEWUNNA.COM. I’m excited for it and hoping to just smash it out quickly, as I have my chick besties birthday that evening in Leeds…which will include, good times and drinking.

Someone from Hong Kong has just rang me? Who’s in Hong Kong? I don’t know anyone who goes to Hong Kong, except ‘London Business Man’ and well we’re not speaking to one another, so it’s not him.

If I could say anything to you today, it would be that you KNOW you’re worth, BE IT in love or work. Don’t sell yourself short. People will sometimes try and make you. They’ll tinkle their fancies and tonker their widdles. Yet, the choice you should always make is the mighty one.

Don’t sell yourself short. Be treated the way you WANT to be treated.

I also had a guy friend of mine walk into a room and sigh. When I asked him what the problem was he just said..

‘I hate it here.’

From what i’ve learnt from my 37 years so far, is that YOU KNOW when you’ve had enough. You’re body, heart or mind will tell you when you’re done….We forget to listen to our souls, don’t we? I’m a really determined person. I don’t ever do what I don’t want to do. And some may call me a ‘diva’ for it…But I don’t care…It’s my choice, my life.

So just as much as I love a ‘people reminder.’ I’m just reminding you to take care of your life and live it the way you’ve always imagined.

Right that’s all now. Kate (who was talking about Pork Chops) has just walked in with a friend…

I’m off to be social.

Thank you for following my life…

Chrissie x

 

 

 

Challenges, Balls & Busy Times

Image may contain: 1 person, smiling, standing

Happy Frinally! How you all doing? I’m utterly rushed off my feet. It’s busy, but it’s all good. I’m feeling grateful for the Wunna Land *buzz* and even though it’s completely what I asked for Lol….I’m not gonna lie and say it’s not hard work.

Hard work pays off…

(And all that…;) )

I have a lot going on. I’m excited to cook with Kwoklyn Wan next month, and to also film the advert for my blog next week. I’m looking forward to celebrate friends birthdays and pick up my new whip. I’m scheduling and rescheduling and i’m trying to get it all sorted. There’s not enough hours in the day, nor is there days in a week.

But it’s exciting times..

I’m lucky. I don’t have it bad.

(And to everyone who has started a blog, a vlog, a social account or whatever it is, that you’ve chosen to ‘Boom,’ DO KNOW, that it takes utter dedication and work. It’s a FULL TIME job…that may not be rewarding at first..Yet once it bursts it’s ridiculously amazing. Like with anything, stick at it. It depends on how much you want it to work, I guess. If you ‘half ass’ it, you’ll get ‘half ass’ results. Which is better than nothing…Yet, with it being so competitive, there are people who aren’t ‘half arsing’ it…with their jobs, their kids, their everything in between and they’re the names that are smashing it or going to smash it in the future.

Preach over. I’m just being real. I get asked about it all the time.

I shot this morning, I also did DAY 2 of my Herbalife challenge (for all of you asking me about that also, do know that you can inbox me at any time and I’ll send you the details.)

Also, i’m getting a lot of emails for ‘meet and greets.’  I’m excited to ‘meet and greet’ with you.  BUTYou do need to make sure you email : info@thecelebritymanagement.com They will get it sorted for you and i’ll hopefully see you soon.

Plus, thank you for all the love i’m getting for, what i’m calling…‘my nipple pics.’ Lol. My nips appreciate the love? I don’t know what to say? If you subscribed to my Only Fans Account (onlyfans.com.chrissiewunna) you would’ve actually seen those pics…and a bit more…at the beginning of the week. Lol (They get exclusive content.)

Right, i’ve got all the blurb out the way! 🙂 I feel like I wrote that in one quick breath.

I have a busy weekend. Which reminds me i need to reschedule something. Ugh. I hate rescheduling, but sometimes, you just have to! 🙁

Mother’s Day is approaching, which a day that means so much to me. I was actually meant to ‘influence’ a brand for Mothers Day but I didn’t have the time to fit it in, which was hard on me, because it’s a brand that I adore.

However, I’m looking forward to both spending time with my own ‘Mama,’ and with Ruby and Junior. (I’ve emailed both Dads today, to do a ‘Day Switch’ with me, as they usually do ‘Sunday with the Babies.’ BUT, both have them have ignored my message. Lol.

WHICH IS ANNOYING.

Co parenting is bliss, but difficult at times.

But the kids are happy…and that makes me smile. (It’s World Book day’ today at their school and Junior actually thought i was pranking him and making him go to school in fancy dress, just for kicks. Lol. As if!!)

Junior: ‘If no one else is dressed up MUM. I’m gonna be SO UPSET AT YOU’

Me: ‘What Ruby’s *Little Red Riding Hood.*’

Junior: ‘That doesn’t count. She’s weird anyway.’

Me: ‘Show me ya pecs.’

(He went as Superman and it’s ace because it has padded pecs and muscles in. LOL. DYING.)

Talking about death…Ruby laid on m bed last night and asked me about the above. She’s recently had two great grandparents pass away and it’s weirdly stuck. It’s in her head constantly.

‘I don’t want you to die. When will I die. I don’t want…’

‘Don’t focus on people dying. Focus on having the best time ever, whilst you can baby. That’s what living is all about.’

I kissed her and she went to bed.

(Awww. I hate that it’s stuck in her head.) 

I’m currently hiding (yes because i’m creepy.) I needed a quiet moment, so i’ve come to a quiet place to secretly blog. You know when you just fancy some ‘you’ time…away from the ‘la dee daa.’ I love quiet chill moments by myself. I guess, when you have a really ‘social’ career…You treasure these moments.

I love them.

I get what Ronnie (one of my LA besties, who came to visit me in London recently) meant now. He’s a celebrity chef out there and well he said, whilst we were drinking in his suite, (well I was, he was ill) that he always posted a week afterward, simply because he didn’t want anyone to know where he exactly was.

Crazy innt.

But I get it now. Lol.

(I remember getting really drunk that night and dancing around a pretend executive suite cage. Ronnie’s gay by the way. Anyway, It ended up being such a hilarious evening. I love memories.)

Loads of people are messaging me telling me that I don’t need to do my 30 Day Challenge. I don’t wanna hear that. I’ve chosen to do it. So I’m doing it. What I need is support. Lol. So grab ya Wunna Flags and start telling me to smash it. I’m not defeatist by any mean. But, I just need to hear champion talk. Lol. You don’t have to do it. But I really want to. So yes, from now…

CHAMPION TALK, Please!

(It’s actually making me feel really good.)

I have also noticed that a bunch of my guy friends are haring on about how they don’t get an ‘International Mens day.’ Lol. Stop being babies…You wouldn’t do anything on it anyway. 🙂 Then I saw  react so incredibly to ‘Steak & Blow Job’ day with with March 14th. I’ve never seen so many excited posts. It’s not until Wednesday. So you just need to calm down.

I’m sure lots of you will get you steak and have us …*fill in the blank.* Lol. 

I do actually think you deserve a day, because it’s not that easy being a dude. So that can be your day to embrace.

Hope you all get blowys and red meat. Lol

ANYWAY…

Right now in life, i’m busy, but i’m feeling happy and free. I’m feeling liberated and finally like i’m getting somewhere. I had to make a switch, which took a lot of balls, but I did it and I haven’t looked back.

Don’t be scared to do the things that make you happy, because if you are, you’ll never feel fulfilled….

Kisses,

Thank you for following my life!

See you on my ‘Socials.’