My Airport Jiggle to a Sassy Spanish Getaway

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Whatsapp Msg: ‘Morning!’

‘Morning!’

So on April 5th at exactly 4am, my alarm went off, my *wake up* call shimmied and I started getting ready, glamming up, sorting the last bits of packing, wishing that I had a morning mimosa and that was before I kissed the babies, whilst they were still asleep and dashed out the door, with only two pieces of hand luggage ( I always travel light, I’m not a ‘take the pope and the kitchen sink’ kinda gal.) Myย driver pulled up, greeted me like he was the perkiest, most stylish human ON EARTH to ever do 4am…and with a…

‘It’s lovely to meet you…Let me take your bags…’

I stepped into his ‘RS’ and we travelled to Leeds/Bradford airport, so I could get my pretty arse on that flight to Spain.

Wooooooooohoooo!

(I don’t know why i’m shouting ‘Wooohooo’ because I pretty much had a panic attack and got super nervous, the evening before for no real reason, other than being a girl. Yipppeee.)

So, for my airport runs, I used Pit Stop Rentals. (You can search them on INSTAGRAM.) They’re a prestigious, super car, chauffeuring company, who pretty much make sure you get to your destination stylishly, in good time and whilst catering that time to your needs.

I’m a service girl. You all know that from this blog. You can be 2 Star orย 5 Star brand, if the service is poor….I’ll never use that company again…and I guess,ย  it’s is scary territory for some, as they’re very aware that I write a blog. ๐Ÿ™‚ But always great for me, because I mostly get treated deliciously. Lol

We chatted all the way to the airport, as the dawn turned to day. Clear roads. Easy run. Not traffic. Just bliss. I love travelling at that time. We laughed, We joked. He asked me about my career. Why I was headed to Spain? He gave me really good life tips! And it was great because he settled my nerves and not only made me feel really comfy, yet also kinda made me feel extra confident and somewhat powerful. I needed that.

So, i’ll give them MEGA POINTS for service. It was literally like an airport run with ya best friend AND therapy IN ONE…and you know what I’m like, I’ll chat to anyone, about anything….He did great to put up with my ‘extremely glammy’ ๐Ÿ˜‰ย  shit.

As soon as we pulled up…my driver then let me take a gzillion selfies, and let me Snapchat and Insta story my entire journey t….as he turned up the tunes and enjoyed the show! Lol

Driver: ‘Make sure you get chair in! Aw! As if you accidentally deleted the best one.’

Me: ‘I know, I hit the wrong thing.. Are you going in it?’

Driver: ‘Nooo. I don’t have my sunglasses. I’ve been up since 4am.’

Me: ‘Yeah, but you don’t look like shit. You’re hot!’

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By this time, everyone in the car park was glaring at us, so I made the executive decision to quit being a twat and just get myself into the airport. ๐Ÿ™‚ There’s no shame in my game. I’m a ‘You only live once, so make your story worth it’ piece of chicken. If you want to watch…WATCH. It’s only when you scowl and watch that makes me think you’re ‘judgey.’

Now, when i’m chatting service…My Pitstop Rentals Driver, not only grabbed my bags out the boot for me, BUT also carried them all the way into the airport, through the airport, (I had already ‘checked in online‘ with myย Jet2.com app,)ย he helped me avoid the queues, by chatting to the Jet2 representatives for me, and then sat me down, in a cafe, (because I was super early for my fight ,)ย and BOUGHT ME a large coffee and a muffin! Lol.

Is that like the best service on EARTH or what???

Then we started just chatting in general about life. He aske me about my world, my love life, my job.

‘You’re the luckiest girl in the world. I would love to have woken up this moment, and be jetting off on a Spanish getaway for a couple days for… And to have had a career young, where you just casually moved to Hollywood to be a model… Lol.’

I asked HIM about his life and found out that he enjoys all things ‘bouji’ and that he DOESN’T TRAVEL LIGHT.

Me: ‘I always travel light, because I have non working arms and if I need to get away fast, I can. Lol’

Driver: ‘That’s a good idea… I don’t know why i’m agreeing, I DON’T actually ever travel light ever. I’m like a chick. I had a 2 night stay in a hotel, took everything in the world, filled a car, took 4 changes of shoes, my slippers, dressing gown, 2 tracksuits, 4 shirts… 3 pairs of jeans….Two wedding outfits….Lol’

It was like the GQ version of ‘The Hungry Caterpillar,’ the part where he just stuffs everything in his belly.

Yet, I enjoyed that could say the word ‘bouji’ and he totally got what I meant, without question, as sometimes people look at me like i’m speaking a whole different language. And I know when people are just pretending to understand what I’m saying to them. ๐Ÿ˜‰ He wasn’t.

Time flew…and before you know it, we headed to Security, to get through the the Boarding gates. Just so I didn’t have to wait…he paid for me to FAST TRACK through , because the lines looked so horrific…and

OH MY GOD! IT WAS A GOO JOB HE THOUGHT OF THAT!

(At that point he left me to my own devices….as I scheduled in my return pick up…)

‘Thank you so much, I really appreciate everything. I’m back on Saturday at 7pm.’

‘It’s been a pleasure thank you. See you then!’

So, I fast track through to security…and from that point it all goes *TITS UP.*

I get to the security, plonk all my stuff in the trays…that goes through to be examined…

There’s things in my luggage that i’m not allowed to take on the plane, so that get’s put to one side, to be opened up and looked through.

I BLEEP at the ‘walk through,’ so I then have to wait to be patted down and mini searched.

By this time, it is now BUSY AS HELL! There’s what feels like a gzillon people, trying to rush through security.

It takes so so, because it’s so busy, that as my flight is boarding…I’m still at security WAITING FOR MY BAG TO BE OPENED UP AND LOOKED THROUGH.

I was there so long, that my gate was now no longer boarding, BUT CLOSING!!!

By this time, I’d won the support of the crowd, who were all rooting for me to get on this plane…and offering me all kinds of help…and letting me push in.

But no pushing in is allowed…as the have to do everything in order…

So, I did what any ‘Diva’ would do…I asked nicely….I asked nicely again, in the most politest manner.

‘I am so so sorry, as I know it’s not your fault, because it’s really busy and just you having to go through everything…But my gate is flashing *closing* and my bag hasn’t been checked through…’

There was nothing he could do…and to be honest, I got that…But I ‘Glamour Pussed’ him in the eye and he gave me a look like he wanted to help and needed to help…but wasn’t allowed to.

An middle aged couple almost ‘begged’ him to let my bag be searched ahead of their bad. But then the big grumpy boss came over and reiterated that ‘NO SPECIAL TREATMENT‘ was allowed…(which is true Lol…But if I can work it, I will.)

Grumpy but right Boss: ‘Do, not let her put her hands in her suitcase!!! It’s not allowed.’

So after I realized that….I did what any little ‘DIVA’ from the Orient would do (because I wasn’t gonna miss that flight and I wasn’t getting my own way.. )

I KICKED THE FUCK OFF! ๐Ÿ™‚ HURRAH!

‘I have been WAITING HERE FOR HOURS! My gate had boarded and almost CLOSED IN THAT TIME. I’M GONNA MISS MY FLIGHT AND i KNOW YOU DON’T CARE, BUT THIS IS NOT OKAY!!!’

I kinda said it shouty…

And weirdly, it was my turn for my bag to be checked through…It got opened, sent back through the tunnel, came out the other end and then security even HELPED ME repack it as fast as he could….

I thanked everyone….and then

DASHED LIKE CRAZY TO MY CLOSING GATE.

I was in diamante heels and all the Duty Free lot where trying to spritz me with their latest scents as I flew by. Lol

‘I’ve godda go. I’m late for my flight.’

I finally get to Gate….Everyone has boarded. I smash through, out of breath, looking all sorry for myself…

He laughs, checks my boarding pass and passport…

‘Please just tell me i’ve made it..’

‘OOooooooh CLOSE!!! Get on love. You’re fine. You’re off to Spain!’

‘AH! I love you! Thank God for that!’

Last one on. The Jet2 staff couldn’t have been lovelier to me!

Just over 10 minutes later….

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I was on my way to Spain….

Get Me To Spain & Ronaldo Beach Towels

Happy Wednesday, my gorgeous whips of lick festival! That’s it. I’m on holiday mode. I’m feeling the chicas and shaking the maracas and booty grinding to my mirror image, to any ‘holiday memory’ song that will have me.

I’ve worked so so hard this year and in fact all of last year…I’ve worked so hard… I could die. I’ve jiggled and juggled and mummied and selfied. I’ve wiggled and waddled and written every piece of my life out for my own settle of mind and for your own delicious entertainment. There’s been great times, hard times…jollies and stress…Right now, I don’t care….Get me to Spain. I fly tomorrow morning.

I AM NOT IN PANTS. SAFETY LAST!

In fact, if i’m being honest, i’m currently sat up in bed blogging and feeling ridiculously IMPRESSED, with how WELL my tan has developed from last night. Yes, I know I’m Asian and already tanned. Yet, before a bit of โ€˜bikiniโ€™ and because i’m a bit of a Glamour Puss…

*Flashback* Guy: ‘Everyone wants a shot at the glamour puss.’

…I do like a quick fake over, to make my tan McJuicy. I used the Model Co, ‘One Hour Tan Mousse’…

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and I’m always really skeptical about fake tans, because I always figure they’re just gonna wash completely off and not be dark enough for me. But i’ve woken up impressed. So GET ME TO SPAIN NOW.

I couldn’t sleep all night. I don’t know why? I’ve flown a lot, but I don’t like flying and airports stress me out. I was up at 4am stroking ‘Rocco’ my kitten (that sounds rude..it wasn’t that fun….that ‘stroke’ was yesterday ๐Ÿ˜‰ ) and did what I normally do, when I can’t sleep and that is..

GOOGLE EVERYTHING. (Apart from myself. I hate doing that because all the pictures are really old and cringe.)

So, on my Google agenda at 4am, was every celebrity…’on the beach.’ Lol. (Yes, I am that sad. Some people Google ‘World Peace,’ I Google ‘beach bodies‘ and I’m okay with that.)

I went with ‘The Kardashians’ obviously, as they calm my soul in bikinis at 4am, when i’m stressed. I even watched an Oprah interview with them all.

Then I don’t know how I got onto it….(I Googled it ๐Ÿ˜‰ )….But I ended up with ‘Cristiano Ronaldo on the beach’ shots. Lol. AGAIN, what a good find at 4am in the morning….It was SO good that I may have become moderately obsessed with his beach shots. I found myself rating his ‘old school’ look, against his ‘new school’ look.

HAHAHAHA. Why am I a tool?

This is why I need to sleep. This is why I need to grow up. This is why my 7 year old daughter Ruby says,

‘Why does everyone else at school have a normal Mum and I have one that’s like a teenager. You’re like a child.’

The most hilarious part of this Google search was that I ended up at this…

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The Cristiano Ronaldo beach towel on ebay. Lol. It could be yours for the bargain price of 30 quid. So I did what any normal girl would do…(no, I didn’t buy it…which reminds me I haven’t packed a towel for my holiday yet,)ย Instead, I *screenshot* it and Snapchatted it to my girl bestie ‘Firmonnell’ who I was messaging last night, with a caption that read…

‘Nothing makes me happier than this towel… Happy Morning!’

The good thing about ‘Firmonnell’ is that she knows I’m an absolute plank, and will just go with it anyway. (Probs because I can get us free cocktails.) And she replied this morning with simple ‘laughy face’ emojis….meaning..

I MAKE PEOPLE HAPPY. (And that like any other normal human being, she can’t be arsed to type before 7am.)

I’m an early bird, so even if I CAN sleep, i’m still up at the crack of dawn. I like to get the most out of my day. Like, I honestly don’t know how people ‘sleep in‘ until noon and slob about eating bacon sarnies, whilst trumping, wondering where life has gone.

Am I in Spain yet? No? Okay cool…

Right, technically, I should take this moment and I do want to take this moment to…

THANK EVERY SINGLE HUMAN AND OR COMPANY…

..That has send me a treat for my holidays. I have been inundated with gifts, products, services and from brands all over the land…and I honestly couldn’t be more grateful. I really, truly appreciate it and I can’t believe how lucky I am. You’ve made me feel really special and in return, I’ll blog, picture and snap the ‘jollies’ out of your products, whilst I’m away. Thank you ever so much. Honestly…I will make sure that they are all over my ‘socials’ throughout my time in Spain.

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Here are a couple of my treats from companies Mirror Image Style (mirrorimagestyle.co.uk) and @Mishmashfashionuk (mishmashfashion.co.uk)ย 

Thank you so much. I’ve tried them all on and they are divine. In total I have 22 bikinis….and you’ll all be rocking this blog and my socials shortly. I’m gonna look ‘Queen’ because of you.

I’ve literally spent the last entire week in bikini fitting, after bikini fitting. Followed by hair piece fitting, after hair piece fitting….It’s been crackers. Yet, I appreciate it all. I feel so lucky. (It makes an old bird smile. ๐Ÿ˜‰ )ย 

I also want to thank ‘Pitstop Rentals, Leeds’ (they’re actually everywhere, all over the North, not just in Leeds) which is a LUXURY/PRESTIGE super car rental and chauffeuring service. I love them so madly and well they will ‘new whipping’ my arse to the airport.

But you’ll all see pictures of everything…as I’ll be placing them everywhere. Make sure you’re following my ‘social’s and stories.’

The diets been going well…I’m still Herbalifing and i’m on Week 4. My body’s changed quite a lot and i’m enjoying feeling a little bit more in shape…and at 37 with two babies…who flipping doesn’t. It’s given me a new lease of life. It made me feel really great! So, i’m certainly doing better for it. I did have someone ‘hate’ on me for doing it, yet mainly because they wanted to indirectly promote their ownย  fitness/nutrition brand all over my wall….

I’ll tell you now. The best way to promote something, is not to ‘hate’ on something or someone else, and place it all over a seemingly popular persons wall to gain audience. As soon as you do. I’m not interested. And I understand that it wasn’t the brand itself, it was someone trying to promote the brand…Yet, they properly went about it, the absolute wrong way. I mean, they even ‘hated’ on the person or people who introduced me to such….and you don’t even know who that was?

I’m a glamour puss. We’re not rude around here. We’re real…in diamonds. Let’s play bouji.

Bottom line, the reason why I decided to initially Herbalife wasย  simply because I saw a body transformation selfie on the Insta profile of a really good friend of mine. He looked amazing. In fact really great. I was personally really impressed….I was SO impressed that it INSPIRED me to want to get back into shape and start feeling extra great.

I spoke to that person…and they helped point me in the right direction…that’s how I ended up here.

Life works via word of mouth, or by the way you choose to cultivate a rapport, with someone. They didn’t ‘hate’ on my wall to promote something because they didn’t have to. They’re classier than that. Instead they showed their own result…which celebrates an achievement..which ended up with ME *tapping* on their door with a ‘help me.’ By all means, mention someone and be lovely about them…Everyone adores that….Yet, just do things correctly….It’s classy and sassy baby boo.

SIMPLES….

It’s funny because I always say, that everything in life, is all about how something makes you FEEL. Nothing more… nothing less.

We react to how the littlest or even biggest things MAKE US FEEL and the only things that can truly make us FEEL, are other things that can FEEL also.

A bit of a preach there for you. ๐Ÿ˜‰ I’m not saying lets all be kind to one another and wear party hats, whilst we sway to boyband love songs. That’s not human nature. We’re all different.

What I AM saying, is let’s be flipping REAL here, instead of dickheads.. Bottom line, don’t hate on another brand on my wall, simply to promote your own. ๐Ÿ˜‰ It is definitely bad manners.

Hahah. I’m over it now. Life was better when I was Googling Ronaldo beach towels at 4am.

I love life. I adore experience. To me, it’s what life is about. And yeah I’ve done some really outrageous things, during my existence so far, that have placed me in really sticky situations. (But I definitely blame the boogie and Hollywood for them. A tremendously surreal place to grow into an adult.)ย  I’ve always been a ballsy one, a life liver, a wild one, who is never afraid to ‘DO ME.’ And yes, i’ve definitely mellowed out at 37, when it comes to the wild antics, yet not when it comes to TRUE SPIRIT. I’ll always do what i love and what I want. And I never feel like I want or need to explain or justify them…as I’m living my own version of life.

When life dishes out crazy bad/exciting times, and you get caught up with the fine art of mistake making…ย (I did this a lot in my 20’s and I am proud to say that I haven’t mistake made in YEARS now..)ย to me it’s all about the LESSONS YOU LEARN. And if a real lesson HAS been learnt, than I am pretty fine with having that experience. I don’t worry about how I got here. I concentrate on where i’m at now….

Everything happens the way it’s supposed to…and we always find out why in the end…

GET ME TO SPAIN!

Here’s a tune to put you in my Holiday mood. (I did all my fittings to this yesterday, as the children made Zebra’s, which Junior still thinks is a Giraffe out of random Wunna Land. Arts & Crafts bits.)

I might not have chance to blog before I land on Spanish soil tomorrow afternoon…So please do follow my ‘Socials’ and Stories.

Love you lots,

Chrissie x


 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Friends, Wine, Gingers & *C* Bombs

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Morning! Gosh! It’s such a busy time. I’m running around like a topless ๐Ÿ˜‰ chicken, trying to get everything dished, dashed and sorted. It’s absolute mayhem. But, what can I say, I’m loving it. (I never take for granted how lucky I am.)

There’s a lot going on right now and yeah, it can feel stressy and yeah, yesterday I felt like I didn’t have the positive support that I needed…But today’s a new day…I’m breathing, I’m smiling and i’m sat blogging this in a giant faux fur, knee high boots, diamante danglers and with heated rollers in my hair!

THAT MY BITCHES…IS GLAMOUR PUSSING. We’ll call it *EXTRA.* ๐Ÿ˜‰

Anyway, that last Sunday, I ended up meeting ‘Poggy’ at The Carleton for a couple drinks…without my bank card. (I have it now. Life is bliss.) The guy she wanted to maybe go on a date with was busy, yet instead, a different guy had waited all night until his guy friends had each left, then approached her with a…

‘I was waiting for them to leave, so I could get to chat to you….’

They ended up on a ‘date.’ So, even though it’s ‘early days,’ I guess everything happens for a reason. You get what you’re meant to get…and life sort of times things correctly for you. You’ll be surprised at how many things do actually fall into place. It’s magical and like I always say, it’s a ‘magic’ we can’t control.

I never use timing as an excuse. You meet people because you’re meant to meet them..even if right away that second, you have no clue why? It’s always for a reason, a season or a lifetime. You’re paths will keep crossing, until all life elements are correctly in place, and you’ve figured out your connection.

Barmaid to Poggy: ‘He’s the kinda man who will kiss you when you need to be kissed and slap you when you need to be slapped.’

That Sunday night ended up being wilder than I thought? So much fun. Good friends, new memories and all around a table…as day turned to night.

There was laughter, wine and sarcasm as it’s finest…and as always, we definitely got carried away. You can’t get us started with banter, in the name of wit and ‘Being Yorkshire’ we go for it.

I went to school with ‘Poggy’ and she’s been a good friend of mine for years. We were actually laughing over the fact that our ‘careers teacher,’ stated that she would become a marine and that I would become a florist, after we answered a couple of personality questions. Lol.

Poggy: ‘How the F*** did they come up with that!!’

Me: ‘I must have just said I like flowers and pretty things and you must have said that you…’

Pet Laura: ‘Like to kill things…Lol. It’s like The Hunter & The Vajazzle.’

(‘Pet Laura’ is a Dog Groomer. She found herself at our table, wishing she was in Africa, bottle feeding tigers, or something? Then she had gin.)ย 

One gin down and she was naming our vagina’s after ‘Harry Potter’ spells. I distinctly remember looking up and for some reason ‘Poggy’ and ‘Pet Laura’ were doing these weird hand actions and refering to their ‘lady parts’ as..

HUNTER.

(Mine’s not a ‘Hunter,’ mines just tired. Hi, True love! Where are you? Please find me.)

Poggy: ‘I think that because you have such a busy life and a busy life online, you would always need a man who is chilled. Someone who gets on with it and takes that stress away…’

Me: ‘Yeah, I don’t like a stressy man. I don’t like them to come with a bundle of emotional issues… I don’t like things to be complicated. I don’t have time to unfold, mend or cry into wine anymore.’

Y’know, everyone always thinks i’m picky when it comes to love and I’m not picky as in ‘fussy,’ i’m just happy and when you’re happy….you sometimes wonder whether you need to invite another human in? But then I think, I’m gonna need someone to carry heavy bags and do the bins, aren’t I? ๐Ÿ˜‰

So, yeah, I should probably team up with a fella and do ‘lifetime’ sometime shortly.

I just don’t want to invest in a ‘fling’ at 37. I can’t be arsed. I’m not excited by them. I’m too old for that I’ve ‘flung’ all the way through my 20’s, hoping that it would always be forever. Each time I got it wrong. Even after ‘I doing it’ three whole times!

What I’ve learnt, is that I don’t need to worry about it. YOU don’t need to worry about it either. Girls always worry about it. I never do.ย  I have absolute faith, that no matter what, the man who truly loves me, because he can’t help it, (banter, winks, diva strops and all)….will come get me. (I shouldn’t have used the word ‘get’ it makes it sound like he’s gonna kidnap me and throw me in the back of a van.)

But you get what I mean….innit! ๐Ÿ™‚

All I have to do, is ‘sit pretty,’ get on with life…and wait. Cupid an I are mates now. He doesn’t mess with me. I don’t mess with him. It’s simples. Plus, Girls shouldn’t chase boys. We shouldn’t have to. I enjoy the traditional art of the ‘dude coming forward.’

Annnnnyway… (I totally got distracted…)

That Sunday…day turned to night and the bright blue skies, were slowly blanketed with a navy sheet, that almost swirled in a grey mist, littered with stars. (I don’t actually know if there were stars out?? Lol. I’ve made that bit up.)

‘Pet Laura’ had left and just as she did, the outside door swung open and out popped ‘Parsons.’ (She’s a friend of a friend, who is ace, because whenever she’s drunk, she gets really gobby and starts doing hand stands and rollie pollies everywhere.)

The tempo changed to that good old, loud, cracking, fast Northern, naughty, foul mouthed, BANTER.

IT WAS GREAT! (I cannot even repeat what was said.)

‘Parsons’ enjoys to use the *C* bomb, which I always find hilarious. She’s such a free spirit. Such a wild, loud, laugh! In fact, she loves the *C* bomb so much, that she even delivers it in melody.

Everything at this point turned into a blurry, fun, wine drenched haze. And a red ‘outside heater’ glow, surrounded us. It nurtured us. It kept us safe. It obided to he rules of The Wine Gods.

Now, ‘Poggy’ and ‘Parsons’ got on really well…They have swimming in common. They want to swim everywhere together. They want to travel the world and swim through valleys.

It was like one of those moments when you first meet someone in a bar, but you’re both pissed, think you’re best friends and plan holidays together! ๐Ÿ™‚

Me: ‘You’re definitely not going to swim together.’

Parsons: ‘Everyone thinks i’m fat. But i’m actually a really good swimmer.’

(Then she did ‘swimming arm’ demonstrations at me.)

Me: ‘I only do breast stroke with my face above the water, so it doesn’t ruin my face.’

Anyway, they had some unique ‘hoe’mance’ going on. They loved each other and mocked ‘Parsons’ ginger husband, who was definitely stood, pressing the ‘heater on’ button every 10 seconds.

Poggy: ‘He’s like The King of The Gingers.’

Me: ‘But he’s not even ginger? You can’t be The Ginger King…when you’ve got brown hair? Surely that’s not a title you can take?’

Parsons: ‘He IS ginger. I’ve got a ginger kid and i’m a brunette. I love you *Poggy,* you’re like a blond version of me… in a polo neck.’

(Now, i’ve just looked at my blog notes from that evening and I’ve typed ‘Fast pass to brown hair,’ after that piece of ‘polo neck’ statement. However, I have no clue, what that means now? Lol. All I remember was looking up and seeing the girls bickering over who had said the ‘funniest’ thing..)

‘Why have you put that down. I said something WAAAY MORE FUNNIER THAN HER and that SHOULD MAKE THE BLOG.’

All got really drunk. All had a lot of fun. I got stopped a couple times, that evening by the occasional Geordie and people who love my ‘Blog/Influencey’ stuffs.

I absolutely bantered with you all. But I was far too drunk to dish out advice, which is what everyone was asking me for. ๐Ÿ™‚

I’ve received your DM’s though…So, i’ll try and swizzle in some time to meet and inspire. (I appreciate the love.)

Message me again, in case I forgot. There’s not such thing and reminding me TOO MUCH. I love ‘people reminders’ as I often get lost in work load and jiggery pokery.

Right, I’m off. I’ve got the babies and a lot to try and organize. Things have been so jam packed, that it’s been hectic. I fly to Spain in 7 days. Thursday morning.

I’m kinda really looking forward to getting away for a few days by myself, just to relax and finally get that ‘chill’ time in,ย  that I never seem to prioritize.

It’s been a busy first part of the year…and sometimes I feel like i’m running as fast as I can, but on the spot. Lol.

What I need right now, is to relax…a wine….and a result.

(Things are never that easy though, are they?)

Kisses,

Chrissie,

 

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What Chu’ Know ‘Bout Me…..???

Morning! Morning! Morning! It’s really busy times in Wunna Land and everything is going delightfully. I’m really happy. Things are great. Yeah…I lost my flipping purse and bank cards…But they’re all cancelled off, new ones are headed my way and just like that….life went back to normal. (Even though my Mum did have to take the children and I out to dinner, because I had no access to funds. ๐Ÿ™‚ ) We Pizza Expressed it and I had actually forgot how great the food is there. I only got the Caesar Salad, however it was remarkable! I could have it everyday!

BUT NOT WITHOUT A BANK CARD!

Yippppppeeeee!

Yes! I’m in a great mood. I’m tinkered over in a magical swirl of happiness. I still feel like the luckiest girl alive….and today, my cheeky little swines…You have a…

‘WHAT CHU’ KNOW BOUT ME’ BLOG!

(I do the ‘What Chu’ Know’ blog every so often, when things are a little too busy with work….You inbox me questions…I give you my honest answers…You get to know me better, (maybe on a more personal level…) and we all slip on our stilettos and sing nursery rhymes, to the beat of utter happiness.

You cool? Get it?

Cue SONG:

What is your real name?

Christina Wunna. People are always shocked that my name is actually ‘Christina’ and I have no clue why?

What part of Asian are you from?

I was born in Yorkshire, but both of my parents are Burmese. Making me 100 percent Burmese through blood.

Have you ever got with a girl?

I’ve kissed a girl…Haven’t we all…and maybe messed around with one, once…..back in my Hollywood days….Yet only because I had a weird ‘swinger’ boyfriend. I actually didn’t enjoy it….But being young, I sort of just experimented with the whole thing…for him. I wouldn’t do that now…. I’m far too sassy…. I know what I want….Yet, I don’t judge people on their sexual preferences….Ours just didn’t match…. Lol.

Did you actually go to Private school?

Yeah I did. Hard to believe I know…Lol I went to Hill House in Doncaster, then Ackworth School in Pontefract. I have Doctor parents, so I ended up there. However, both my children actually go to that school there now. Which is lovely.

Weren’t you scared moving to Hollywood when you were young?

No. I was so excited. I wasn’t even scared of the bad things that happen in Hollywood. As soon as I got into my taxi at LAX, after literally just arriving, the taxi driver turned around and said, ‘I’ll give you $100 for a blow job.’ I just looked at him, laughed, said, ‘Don’t be a dick…no’ and he drove me safely to my hotel, without uttering another word. He was more terrified of me. I hate ‘ugly’ humans. Good try. But you lose.

Would you let your daughter be a glamour model?ย 

Not at all. ๐Ÿ™‚ One rule for me….One rule for her… Lol

Would you ever get married again?

Yes. Fourth time lucky. I’ll get it right this time around. I’m just a slow learner when it comes to love. I wear my heart on my sleeve…and it’s shit. Lol

How long have you been single for?

I don’t know….? I don’t really count the minutes, seconds and years of ‘single’ or ‘together‘ life….I just get on with it…

What is you favourite cocktail?

Too vague a question. I love all cocktails. I can literally drink ANYTHING. So it depends on my mood. But I’m a creature of habit, so when I’m hungover, I will find a Bloody Mary. Or at Ego, I’ll always order a ‘Salted Rimmed Margarita,’ When I’m Ginos…I’ll always have an Espresso Martini….When I’m at Tattu i’ll always order the ‘Skull Candy.’ That’s just the way it goes…I attached drinks to memories…They remind me of men, friends or past dates….

Are you completely different to how you were in your 20’s?

Yeah, I’m completely different. You are or will be too. In my 20’s. I loved the 20 year old version of me. I didn’t care what anyone thought. I just LIVED FREELY AND HAPPILY. I was a wild one….I’m not as WILD now…I’m cheeky, but balanced. I just love fun…It’s in my soul…

What do you hate about yourself he most?

Such a nice question? Lol. I hate my wonky bottom tooth, which I never seem to get fixed and I hate that I can’t ever conquer my love life….It’s like i’m on a slow moving merry go around, just doing the same thing over and over again….without learning…

Saw that you just watched Fifty Shades Darker….When it comes to sex, or you Submissive or Dominant, and also when it comes to your regular personality?

I’m sassy. I’m both. Well, I can ‘play’ both. and get off on both. I love to ‘play’ in the bedroom. I’m naughty but fun. It’s good clean filth. Lol. I’m just feel really confident in the bedroom. Yet, I’m not remotely promiscuous. Loyalty is HUGE TO ME. I wouldn’t like to sleep with lots of different people….When you’re in your 30s, you can’t be arsed with the ‘no hopers.’ I have a one track mind and heart…So when I love someone, I love them madly. But only them…

Personality wise…I’m dominant. Really dominant. I’m a ‘Diva. I might play or try and be submissive at times….But I’m not….By nature….I’m bossy. I know what I want…and hate not getting what I want. ๐Ÿ™‚

Your pics are getting hotter and hotter, do you feel under pressure now that your 37 to look good?

Yes! All the time. It’s stressy. Lol. I have a shoot coming up in a couple weeks in swimwear and looking good for that, has sent me moderately bonkers. But I am vain by nature. I don’t find it a chore to primp. I actually love it.

What are your thoughts on long distance romantic relationships?ย 

I’m fine with long distance relationships. I’m actually really used to them. Most of the guys that i’ve dated have had busy careers, that take them away a lot and my career too, is quite busy…so It’s kinda just the norm. Plus, romantically, i don’t think geography is an issue when you truly love someone…You’d still make it work….if you could be arsed to, or if it was meant to be…

Will you marry me?

Where’s the rock?

Will you marry me…have more kids, cook…clean and be my bed slave, then take me to male chauvinism classes??

No. Simples. Lol

Dinner, what are we eating, where and when?

Lol. Everyone wants to feed me…. I get this question almost 4 times a day, by strangers…

Can I be your slave…?

Noooooo. I’m not a Dom. I don’t get off on humiliating strange men. I once had a guy follow me around G.A.Y in London, begging to be my slave…He literally wouldn’t go away and kept doing everything I told him too…It was so dull….It couldn’t have annoyed me more! My friends were pissing themselves because they said, ‘You’re the only person I know, to go to the bar and come back with a slave.’ย 

Can I spoil you?

No. I hate it when guys say that. Surely real men just spoil you anyway, without having to ask because they want to. If you have to ask a girl that, it means you will never ever do it. I buy my own things. ๐Ÿ™‚

You said you’re back on the tv soon, which show?

Can’t tell you…

Being Asian/Oriental did you find it hard breaking into the glamour modelling industry?

No. I started out in LA and out there, you’re actually at an advantage, because everyone is blond, tanned and beautiful, or brunette tanned and ‘girl next door,‘ meaning they have it a lot tougher, because there’s so much competition. ‘Types’ (as in being ‘asian’) work ALL THE TIME, because there’s really just a handful of you in the entire city and they have to put you in the magazine. Lol.

Do you reckon you’ve met the man of your dreams…?

There is definitely someone who I really fancy right now. In fact, more than fancy….

Do you think you’re a good or bad role model for girls?

I’m not trying to be role model. I just write the diary of my life….The good bits and the bad bits….Sometimes i’m preachy and ‘role model’ like, other times i’m a swine. But that’s what makes me real. That’s what makes me human.

Do you make up the stories on your blog?

Noooooo. Not one piece of it is fabricated. Absolutely every single little bit has truthfully happened….to the point where I even MISS things out, because they’re too inappropriate, or because I don’t want anyone to know. All the people are real…They’ve just been given ‘nicknames’ because then they still have their own sense of privacy, yet can enjoy reading and reliving their piece of the blog without you knowing, who they are.

Over the years, are some of the ‘characters’ you’ve labelled with ‘other names’ and wrote about famous?

Oh God yeah….A lot more than you think.

How do you think your blog has become successful?

Word of mouth. It’s like Chinese Whispers…Someone tells someone, who tells someone else….I’ve met a lot of people in my time…So I guess, a lot of people have accidentally read the blog and just told someone else about it….It’s like a cheeky discovery.

What the most important thing to you?

Ruby & Junior. I don’t value anything more than their journey through life…..I’m a soft mum, so they literally walk all over me….

Love or Money?

Both. I like balance. Lol.

If i were to meet you in person, would I be shocked?

No. ‘Shocked’ isn’t the right word? You might feel awkward at first, But everyone feels a little bit weird, until the first five minutes of ‘pleasantries’ are over…I am SUPER DOOPER GOOD WITH PEOPLE.

Would you have another child?

Yes. I’d have one more…Yet, It’s not something that I NEED to do, as I already have Ruby & Junior. I have my hands kinda full, as a lone parent. So, if I knew that the guy was gonna stick around and we were a whole family and utterly committed…Then ofcourse…yeah. I’m sure parenting is much easier with two of you.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Eye Tests, Frillies, Communication & No Bouncing

I’m feeling amazing today. No real reason why? I just feel AMAZING. And it’s always the best kinda ‘AMAZING,’ when you have no real reason to be happy…yet you just are. It rocks. I’m beaming. I kitten rolled out of the ‘right side of the bed,’ I guess? Maybe it’s the weather? Nah! I don’t even have wine? It must just be life. However, regardless, who needs a flipping reason. When you just feel great, you just feel great and I’ll put that in my frillies and………..wait…

(I don’t know what I was going to say there…? But see how smart I am now…I felt my fingers type ‘frillies’ and disciplined them…momentarily.)ย 

GOD! FEELING AMAZING AND SMART TODAY! There are trophies for that i’m sure!!

To be honest, It could’ve gone the other way! (What a surprise.) AS, I could’ve felt really disappointed at around 9am. HOWEVER, because I was already prepared and because i actually grew up a bit…;) I wasn’t. I took life on the chin and weirdly felt great, in fact supportive…and just ‘37 year old’ got it.

‘See! I’m not as much as a douche as you thought.’

You always think you have it hard, until to realize that others may have it a little harder. And It’s when you grow to understand people….or a person in particular…is when you become strong. You become free. That’s why I swear that communication is KEY.

I grew up today…and it rocked.

(There’s this really strange lady, in a long pink coat and a feathery fascinator on her head, galloping around, by racing horses, ‘hooting and hollering’ like she’s…well fucking nuts, Lol. She’s right in front of my eyes, on a tv screen. The zaniest combo. I mean she looks so posh, yet galloping so nuttily. She definitely can’t have had babies and just bred horses instead, because women who have had babies DO NOT GALLOP, nor do we BOUNCE ON THINGS. I had this conversation at a child’s birthday party on Sunday.)

ME: ‘I don’t trampoline or bounce on things. Anything could fall out of me.’

Other Mum: ‘Thank God you said that, cos I draw the line at bouncing…’

Junior: ‘Mum, can you get me another fish finger…’

(Literally, Elvis, your lost car keys..ANYTHING could fall out of me, if HUMANS HAVE….TWICE. I don’t bounce….on much. ;))

I went to Specsavers today for my 2 year eye test. I love and hate eye tests, yet today it was a breeze. There’s something so comforting and sexy about dark dark rooms, spits of light, whilst your half blind and the joy of cosiness, isn’t there.

The usual two bits I don’t like…is the part where they *puff* fast air into your eye balls. That parts shit. I hate that. AND when the poor optician has to get really REALLY close to your face with his torch, to shine his light in your eyes.

Today…I aced it. I loved it. I’m in a good mood remember. AND he loved that I had a blog. My eyes are dandy! My Optician is a gem and the service that I received today was by far five star! We even got to banter as he showed me ipad shots of the back of my eye.

Me: ‘I don’t know how you do that every day without getting creeped out.’

My eye test was hilarious, because I could just see? So I couldn’t tell much of a difference between stuff?

‘Is it sharper with 1, or sharper with 2?’

‘I can’t tell?? They’re the same. I’m so sorry, I’m so rubbish at this game.’

‘It’s not a game. It’s real life. Is it sharper with 3 or with 4?’

‘They’re similar?? I’m gonna go with 3? Wait! I’m lying to you. 4!’

‘I knew you were lying to me…Lol…That’s why I changed the lens. I had a hunch. Don’t lie to me.’

I kinda just wanted a Corona….All I could see was the pub. ๐Ÿ™‚

‘I hope, i’m interesting in your blog.’

Anyway, the staff and service couldn’t be better at Specsavers. It really couldn’t. I was so impressed. I was even a ‘Diva’ afterwards and asked for a spare free set, because I needed to go to the gym…and with a sly smile and a bit of cheeky love…they gave me one, to make me feel better.

‘Thank you for catering to my Diva Request. Lol. Honestly, i’ll live…it doesn’t matter that much…’

Lady: ‘I’ve got them for you. ๐Ÿ˜‰ ‘

Me: ‘Aww, I feel bad now. Lol’

(I didn’t. ๐Ÿ˜‰ )

But GOSH YES, LIVE IS CURRENTLY AMAZING. I don’t actually know why i’m so happy. I just am…

Find your happy….

It’s worth it…

Chrissie x

 

 

Valentines, Vents & How You Should Adore Your Chick

I’ve just woken up with my son to my left, my kitten to my right and now with my black kitty specs wedged upon my face. I’m trying to read my phone blog notes, but I can’t because my Facebook notifications keep popping up and ruining my flow. Lol. I’m having to duck and weave my neck, just to read any notes, at all!

(No. I haven’t thought to just turn my notifications off.)

Today is a great day. I’m spending it with my babies, Ruby and Junior. We’re just gonna lunch and chill and hang out with my Mum. I’m a family girl…A ‘sassy’ family girl though. ๐Ÿ™‚ But, I love these days because they’re never ever stressful.

They’re FREEEEEEE.

I’m cutting out anything and anyone that’s untrue, negative or not exactly good for the soul.ย  Life is far too short to let nonsense, that doesn’t matter… get the better of you.

Whatever will be will be and I have ultimate faith in life, well my version of it and no matter what, for the last 37 years, i’ve always seemed to land quite safely….with a cocktail in my hand. ๐Ÿ™‚

ย ‘I love cocktails, because they’re beautiful… like little works of art, that totally get you pissed.’

I’ve just watched my LA Bestie’s Instagram story…The one that sent me the lovely card, Theo Breaux.

He’s pissing himself because the ‘Shirtless Tonga Flag Bearer’ is back and has made the Winter Olympics news.

Theo: How is that news??

Now, Theo’s a big beast of a muscly, Gay GOD. No one looks better in Speedos. He’s one of my best best LA friends forever! We grew up together! Go search him on Insta and perv on his pics.

@TheoBreaux

Now, how he ISN’T impressed by the Shirtless Tonga Flag Bearer is not only beyond me, but upsetting me. It’s not even 10am UK time yet, and i’ve already told him off for hating on him…I mean, he’s one of life’s purest treasures. If HE WANTS to be a shirtless sportsman, from Tonga and wave a fucking flag…HE CAN...ALWAYS….(I hope he never stops. Lol)

‘Don’t be hating on the shirtless Tonga guy, dude.’

Oh and the Wunna Fan that I slagged off in my last blog. Lol. The one that only looked at the pictures and never thought to click on my blog, because he didn’t know there was one, sent me a comment reading…

‘ I don’t repeat mistakes..’

Then… he assured me that the blog had been read. ๐Ÿ™‚

Yippppppppppppeeeeee!

I feel bad now. But i do go on rants, because the blog is really precious to me. Yet, I don’t feel that bad, because ‘my rant’ was true to how I felt, and I do want people to be reading the blog. So yeah. I’m gonna go with ‘nevermind’.

Expressing yourself is always better, than saying nothing and exploding.

People can always act anyway or say anything to me, when they’re mad. I always get it and never judge them…It’s only a moment. If I do anything well, I understand people. To me, FEELING something, is always better than being numb to emotion.

The ones that bottle things up, are the ones that turn into lunatics. The ‘Venters’ seem crazy, in that specific moment, yet are usually more stable emotionally, on the whole.

BUT WAIT….

….because it’s almost Valentines Day…I’m currently getting lots of messages, comments, dm’s etc…from you, asking me on Valentine’s Dates. I haven’t replied because my inbox is terrifying. I AM reading them all though and I AM very flattered.

So thank you for the love. I do appreciate it!

One got mad and called me..

‘IGNORANT’ ๐Ÿ™‚

Another thought he had met me before at a Chinese Restaurant in Mayfair, with my friend ‘Kathy.‘ Eh? Who’s Kathy? How can someone think they’ve met me before, if they haven’t? I’m so confused? Lol. But yeah…It wasn’t me. If it was you…This guy wants to date you! Contact him.

One gent, who is a die hard Wunna Fan, (Great taste in Chicks) offered to fly me to Bermuda.

Another, other offered me a pint.

I also had an ‘out of the blue‘ message yesterday stating that I would fall in love with *the message sender* if I saw him, let him take me on a date and that I’d probably have to peel myself off him. Lol. The message was delivered in good humour.

Confident Banter.

I like confident banter. More guys should be more confident. It’s refreshing… He was attractive also. So, it’s flattering. It always makes you feel good doesn’t it..and women should FEEL GOOD.

However. peeling myself off someone would be seemingly quite awkward for everyone. Lol. I don’t think i’m ‘a peeler.’ (I might think about it, yet my SWAGGINESS gets the better of me.) You don’t want to be the girl that clutched onto some guys leg, as he was trying to ‘swift exit’ the bar, texting his ex, telling her that he misses her. Lol. (I actually might have done that before. ๐Ÿ˜‰ )

When it comes to matters of the heart….

I’m a love bunny by nature. But i’m a good balance of wanting you, needing you and loving you…mixed in with being totally independent and free. I believe in love at first sight, yet know that it takes a really long time to understand someone, or learn about someone…

If you’re a guy, please DO treat the one that you adore with absolute love, this Valentines Day. The smallest things make people smile. Being a girl, I know that It means so much to us , even if we don’t say it.

Sooooo many of us chicks, get treated quite badly by gents through our entire jolly years on this Earth Ball…Therefore if there’s a day, where in which you CAN celebrate togetherness, romance and show someone that you appreciate them…WHY NOT.

It doesn’t have to be BIG, it doesn’t have to be clever…It can be anything from the most lavish evening out of utter, shower dripped extravagance, to a simple text that reads,

‘I love you..’

When it’s unexpected it’s the best…

That’s what love is about….Be a team!

 

 

Boys Night, Dating Tips & Auditions…

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Really busy time, so i’m gonna have to bustle through this. I have a ‘dashy’ weekend ahead, which means schedules, train times, those Wunna Land bits of ‘showbizziness’ and…as always… life to conquer. I’ll do it. I always do. And right now, I never felt more confident. I try not to waste time looking over at what other people are doing (I used to do that a lot, it’s human nature…we all get a little nervy.)

However, instead, I’m now just focusing on MY land..WUNNA LAND. If you give something 100 percent…and you’re good at what you do, there is absolutely NO WAY in the jeepers, that you will not succeed.

Luckily, my job right now, is the art ofย  just ‘BEING ME.’ So, if I balls that up, then there’s no help for me. Nor is there enough wine to settle my soul.

I ended up on ‘boys night’ at Ego the other night. I did ‘Girls Night’ didn’t I, last Saturday? I’m one of those chicks who has a great mix of friends, be they girls, boys, young, old….The mix is a ‘jiggle’ but it’s great.

I love boys night. Not as much as girls night, as boys night is far more reserved…My chick friends and I literally tell each other EVERYTHING…and we don’t care, we’ll pour it all out, the good with the bad, with the ugly. Boys are less ‘drama’ and they keep their secrets to themselves…M guy friends are open, yet their level of ‘openess’ is carefully monitored by their pride and sense of masculinity.

(Aside from ‘Jonesez’ he’s like a girl and will cry out his problems over a cocktail, with me.)

But yes, I met Webbo, Dipper and Jonesez for dinner and drinks. They were ‘after work’ suited and booted and then I sort of just flounced in a bit late, all a beam, smiles and with a…

‘Two for One margaritas with a salted rim please!’

I am all about a salted rim. ๐Ÿ™‚

We chatted, we caught up, they slagged other boys off and they drilled me about ‘the girls.’

‘What were they saying about us?’

‘What did she say about ME?’

‘Who’s best in bed out of…?’

‘Do they like me? I bet they slagged me off?’

‘Yeah, but honestly…gang bangs are gross…’

‘Why does he always come in and touch me…Don’t man slap me!!’

‘I’m not arsed me, I’ve just said i’m sharing with someone else…’

‘I love it when you get your nipple out on your selfies Wunna.’

‘Shall we eat. I’m starving..’

‘It’s not my fault..You picked her!’

‘Are you honestly still obsessing?’

‘Why are the dudes on your Facebook always asking to marry you?’

‘Yeah, but our Girls night isn’t sweet and lame. We don’t plait each others hair to Boyband tunes. We’re all SASSY…it’s hardcore.’

‘Why have you stopped getting cocktails Wunna?’

‘Stop trying to get me pissed.’

The thing about ‘Boys Night’ is that there is always a boys code…and even though i’m a chick, having all guy friends in LA…I know the code…It’s kinda like ‘Girl Code,’ but you don’t have to remind them not to say anything. ( I do prefer the drama of a ‘Girls Night’…and mainly because i’m a girl. Yet, I am sizzled over with a BOYS sense of inappropriate humour….I don’t care…It’s hilarious. So yes, boys night was ace! I know some great guys!)

BOY CODE, SAVE AS!

I’m currently sat with a half a Peroni, at The Carleton trying to smash out this blog. I was on a phone audition all last night. I had one through the afternoon and then I had to shoot, followed my bambinos and reply to all my ‘socials.’

At the same time, I was going back and forth on email with my agent…and it was all pretty manic. I’m having a really busy time, but i’m loving it. I’m really enjoying and i’m enjoying it because I do what I love.

I have noticed that I don’t like ‘fuss.’ I like everything to be taken care of…with no ‘fuss.’ I don’t like the ‘faffiness’ of projects…I just like to get on with things. That’s when it comes to work and dating….

This is actually a really good tip for guys..

GIRLS DO NOT LIKE FUSS…WE WANT YOU TO TAKE CARE OF SHIT…

Like, if you were to ask us out on a date…We’d prefer if it you took charge, stood up all manly and just said…

‘Right, are you free… on this date….to do this…? Great! I’ll pick you up at *this time…’

(And you organised everything, so we can just get dolled up, enjoy the night and adore you. That’s how it works. So, it’s not just when are you free? It’s…’Are you free on…? Great…I’ll pick you up at..’ It’s gentlemanly.)

In the past, whenever i’ve had to organise a man, i’ve hated it. I’m a ‘Girl Boss,’ I love it when a guy takes care of the little things. It’s thoughtful. They take the stress away from you.

I actually remember being sat at the Coffee Bean, outside in the sun, in West Hollywood, by the Beverly Center. I used to go there every morning.

This guy, with shoulder length blond hair and sunglasses, who was also a model, called ‘Berlin,’ used to sit with me and chat life, each morning…I remember how schooled he was in the art of dating…But I guess the LA boys are, because they do it so much and they do it well. They can’t treat a girl badly on a date, because the ‘show of it all’ is SO important in Hollywood…plus ALL THE GIRLS TALK. You get a bad rep…no girl with touch you.

Berlin: ‘Well, I just text her and told her that i’d love to do dinner with her at ‘Koi,’ tomorrow night and that i’d pick her up at 7pm…and because it was all sorted for her…she just said. I didn’t give her time to think. Lol. Chicks like to have everything organised for them.’

Then we’d go on our auditions for the day. But he was right! Lord knows what he’s up to now?

Anyway, I really do need to go…So sorry for the quickie blog ;)..but sometimes ‘quickies’ are awesome!

Busy, busy weekend ahead!

Hope you loved today’s selfies…

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Thank you for following my diary.

Chrissie x

 

Auditions, Daffodils & He’s Nothing Like Mary Poppins…

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I’ve a busy day today, so I’m gonna have to keep this sassy, brief and delightful! I’m auditioning and it’s stressful and mainly because I make it stressful. Lol. I put so much pressure on myself because I’m a lunatic. ๐Ÿ™‚ (Code for: ‘I just want to do well and have all my dreams come true.’ We all do! But that’s the problem..In my world…everyone wants the same thing.)

Yipppeee!

But, you get what you get and you don’t get what the ‘The Gods’ believe isn’t right for you. I’m actually feeling quite good right now after Whatsapp messages to someone I hold in my highest regard.

I was all pathetic and nervous and trying to sort out my mindset… I’m honest, so i’ll tell anyone exactly how I feel about everything….and he swooshed on in with motivation at the exact right time.

He’s like Mary Poppins…but not nothing like Mary Poppins, AT ALL? Lol. (Bare with me…I’ve gone insane???) What, I’m trying to say is that he spoon fulled me the ‘truth sugar,‘ from one of the most positive angles and in order to gear me up for a ‘smash it,’ bonanza.ย He did it briefly and real. Not fakey and flourished. (It’s an attractive trait. Kinda made me want to ‘tickle his fancy.’ I love motivational people…not the ones that go on and on… for hours, but the ones that are real and tell you stuff from their own actual life experience…It’s sexy. It always makes me think they’re also really organised…and in the future….I imagine my Knight in Shining Armour to be dead organised….That way they can organise my scattiness.)

ANYWAY….. ( I got distracted…)

Just like that, I felt MIGHTY. The motivational medicine went down a treat…and sometimes it’s all you need…. and with a…

‘Good luck babe…you will smash it…’

I was sorted.

(Why am I currently getting a flash back of Junior misguiding his standup wee?)

‘GET IT IN THE LOO!!! It’s spurting on the floor!’

Monday was great because I got to hang with my girl bestie ‘Firmonnell.’ Miss you Monday turned ‘real life’ and we got to catch up and chat about our world’s combined, as people played with blue and white balls around us and other’s decided to ski.

I always miss her madly, so when we talk, we talk….We get lost it in with a passion. There was a moment where in which we had gotten so ENTHRALLED in our conversation, whilst stood up by a coffee counter…that we forgot we were stood up by a coffee counter and were suddenly awaken by the Barista with a…

‘Do you want chocolate sprinkles on that?’

‘Eh?’

‘Oh shit! Yeah..’

‘Why are you not using the sugars I got you?’

‘I thought they were yours?’

‘What…EIGHT OF THEM.’

‘Let’s sit down..’

Good catch up…Then our other friend ‘Hustle Barbie’ tried to steal my Bestie from me, by presenting her with Daffodils and kindness.

Firmonnell: ‘Hustle’s my new bestie now! She bought me this..’

(Produces photo of daffodils and other loving thoughtful stuff.)

Me: EWW! Why is she stealing my bestie! How dare she be thoughtful. That’s fine. you two can go have a really delightful Vegan time together. I’ll make new friends, with like… Olivia off Love Island.’ Fucking Daffodils.’

Firmonnell: ‘What you buying me?’

Me: ‘Don’t you dare try and game me with the *WHAT YOU BUYING ME’ trick.’

(I’m scarred! It’s not like I haven’t already been on the flipping telly… where I was put through HUGE challenges every single moment of every single day, with a camera in my face…in the name of ‘Hilton.’ Touchy subject, a friendship battle..innit.)ย 

Anyway, great day with ‘Firmonnell.’

‘See you next week? I’m parked over there…’

Me: ‘Can you at least MAKE LIKE YOU NEED ME…’

Miss you Monday’s‘ are the best!

I’ve actually really super dooper need to go! Shit! My hair needs doing. Just wanted to say..

THANK YOU SO MUCH..

To everyone who is engaging with Wunna Land. My ‘Socials’ have been a delight and i’m grateful. It kinda makes me feel all appreciated. Thank you to those watching my ‘Garden gallop’ video gram. So many people have messaged me asking if it was my actual garden? Random question?

But…yes…I’m not going to gallop, open shirt topless in someone else’s garden. Lol. Well? I might? Depends on where life takes me?

Just quickly, I’ve also noticed that people are getting into ‘banter spats’ on my Facebook Fan Page….Just so you know…regardless. I adore y’all! If it wasn’t for your engagements…this land would not be worth it..and I never take that for granted.

It’s pretty rubbish weather today. It’s almost like the skies can’t decide what to do? I want Summer, or at least Spring to shimmie on in now. I don’t like this inbetweeny weather. I’m not grey. I’m not a fence sitter. I need a choice. It effects my outfits. ๐Ÿ˜‰

Before I tinker off…The other day, after a shoot, I stopped to have a chitter with one of my good friends Scott…It was a phone interview and I was sat in my car, at night, in my pyjamas…. But please to click below and take a listen….We’re talking celeb gossip, my time on the Hilton show, ‘behind the scenes’ glamour modelling and my dating life..

I’ve godda go!

Thank you for following my life….

Chrissie x

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Panic Buttons, Good News & That Little Bit Of Pressure…

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I’m at Waterstones in Doncaster. In the cafe, blogging. I’m wedged between two lovely and nattering grannies, who are nibbling crumpets, an edgy chick, who’s hiding under a black beanie, (she’s either having a bad hair day or just wants to hide from Thursday…I do it with sunglasses….If i’m inside and have them on, I think no one can see me… ๐Ÿ˜‰ ) and there’s a spinning tower of ‘Mr Men’ books. ‘Little Miss Tiny‘ has fallen off the spinning tower.

The genius that invented those books, (he’s probably sunning it in Marbs right now)ย is literally fabulous. I mean, ‘Little Miss Tiny.’ It’s just a tale about someone right tiny, who can’t reach shit. It’s brilliant! Lol.

But anyway, back to Wunna Land.

I AM BUSY!

It’s a super busy time…and I let myself get a little stressed this morning. I forgot to find ‘solutions,’ craved a 10am Mimosa, but didn’t have one…and as Wunna Land is becoming increasing popular, opportunities a wiggling in galore.

THANK GOD! I FEEL LIKE I’VE WORKED SO HARD. I’M KNACKERED. I couldn’t be MORE GRATEFUL! COME! COME! PLEASE COME!

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There’s so much that I want to achieve this year and I guess I ‘hit’ panic button… A button that no one really enjoys too ‘hit.’ But I’m actually okay now, because my little Oriental ‘tough love’ Mother pulled me back into shape.

‘You’re being rubbish at focusing on the positive today. Everything’s fine. Stop panicking. Get the work done!’

I’m great now and I actually received a good news DM yesterday, which made me all hopeful. I like the giddiness that comes along with the feeling of ‘hope.’ All you can do is ‘give something ya all,’ smash it the best way that you can….and hope for the best. The rest is out of your control. That’s down to ‘life magic.’

(Someone’s just posted on my Facebook Fan Page, under my usual picture of the day..He’s commented with a GIF of a young man looking impressed, and with the words that read ‘Helloooo Beautiful,’ flashing across it.ย I’ve replied with a ‘Thank you ever so much’ because I appreciate the love, be it sent from the heart…. or the penis. However, the GIF is actually of my ex husband…Lol….So it was quite unfortunate picking really.)

Cheers!

I’ll have to delete it or he’ll get arsey. (Who still gets arsey about things that happened in a previous DECADE. Honestly! It’s 2018, where we’re all ‘loving the Universe,’ andย sending forgiveness vibes for good karmaย and stuff. Arsiness is 2000 and late. Don’t do it. The most attractive people are the ‘smilers.’ Even a sneaky snigger of a smile, is incredibly attractive. Not just the ‘squeaky clean, make fresh pie dumplings, by daffodils’ kinda smile.

(What the **** are ‘Fresh Pie Dumplings??’ Lol)

But yes, enjoying the love.

Can you believe that I’ve actually booked a campaign where I get to wear a padded coat! I even sent ‘a lovely’ a message yesterday saying,

‘WHEN YOU BOOK A CAMPAIGN THAT YOU ACTUALLY GET TO WEAR CLOTHES ON…’

‘Hahahahahaha, love it.’

Then he ignored me when I said, that I’d gone from ‘slutty‘ to ‘wifey material‘ in the space of a white bomber jacket.

Saying that, and in general, I really do think this is true….If I was a guy, I’d always have a really beautiful ‘saucy looking’ wife. I’d be secure and confident enough to have a chick like that. Some guys aren’t.

TRUE STORY

Here’s me in clothes for new brand Attitude Avenue! I’m their newย  model/face and Influencer and hey they chose well! ๐Ÿ˜‰

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You can actually buy that white padded jacket. You can go to their instagram. It’s also on mine. (Do know that there is more than ’12 likes’ on it now…Lol)

ATTITUDE AVENUE.

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But yes, all the auditions, all the collabos, all the work, all the opportunites and lots of things in the ‘hopeful’ bag of tricks. I’m gonna do well because i’m DETERMINED TOOOOO. Lol. I’m like a power rash. I keep coming back. (Ooh the itches.)

I feel lucky. I know I still goddit. I don’t feel by any means ‘passed it.’ I ain’t over any hill yet, but mainly because I don’t climb hills. ๐Ÿ˜‰ Infact, if anything, I feel at my MOST DYNAMIC.ย 

SO LET’S PLAY!

TEAM WUNNA LAND!

(Can you cheer here because it’ll make me feel better.)ย 

Do wish me luck, because you’re following my diary all around the world and I don’t want to balls it all up. I’m in that moderately ‘stressy’ phase of the entertainment business, (people only ever see the result,) where in which I’m ‘auditioning.

It’s the… ‘You want it, you can get it, but you haven’t got it yet’ phase. Infact, no, it’s not stressy. I’m POSITIVE. That’s the wrong word. What i’m saying is… right now, I’m under pressure. A pressure that I put MYSELF UNDER. But it’s good, because then i’ll focus and perform well. I’m not worrying about the things I can’t control, I’m just making sure I give my bit, 100 PERCENT!ย 

Wish me luck.

COME ON WUNNA!

Hopefully you’re going to be veryย  surprised this year…Pleasantly surprised…as I did work hard last year, meaning this year there will be a fewย ‘Wunna Treats’ for you, that you knew nothing about. But like a said, a lot more has come through and I couldn’t be more excited. I’m not really nervous. I’m confident. I just…

WANT! ๐Ÿ™‚

You know when I told you not to ‘want‘ because craving things were bad for you and that more people should be happy with their ‘represent’ their ‘where they are now.’

Scrap that…

Desire and Ambition is sexy…. Lol.

Ps/ I’ve just got a message from my mate…’Jonesez.’ He’s moaning because…Well this is what he said…(i’ve had to ******* out their name because we’re slagging our actual acquaintance off, Lol.)

Jonesez: ‘I was properly impressed with your new photoshoot, weird seeing you back in actual clothes..’ ********* is doing my head in.’

Me: ‘Lol, yeah I forgot that I even wore them… Why whats ********* doing?’

Jonesez: ‘Just talking to me unnecessarily all the time…’

HAHAHAHAHAH.